Jump to content

Type keyword(s) to search

All Episodes Talk: All Rise


Message added by Meredith Quill

Community Manager Note

Official notice that the topic of Sean DeMarco is off limits. If you have 1-on-1 thoughts to complete please take it to PM with each other.

If you have questions, contact the forum moderator @PrincessPurrsALot.  Do not discuss this limit to this discussion in here. Doing so will result in a warning. 

 

  • Reply
  • Start Topic

Recommended Posts

Ye puppies. In a rerun where mom and daughter have some sort of car payment dispute, the daughter has a Cindy Brady hairdo - unnaturally blonde (the dye job starts just above her ears) sausage ringlets. Is she trying to look 6 years old?

  • Love 4
Link to comment

The plaintiff/sister in the boat case has some really messed up teeth.  They were all jumbled together which could be the cause of strange looking mouth.  The stud in her lip is not a good look for her either.

  • Love 3
Link to comment

Thanks for the heads up on the Googly Eyes sightings...my eyes were fixated on her during the dehydrated case. I think it's those boat neck shirts she wears...it's not a good look for her so she really stands out!!!

  • Love 3
Link to comment

The plaintiff/sister in the boat case has some really messed up teeth.

 

Seriously. Instead of asking her hubby for money to give to her loser brother and his beastly girlfriend, she should have used and done something about that jacked-up grill.

 

I noticed that Loser Brother's neck was extremely red by the time JJ was finished flaying him alive.

  • Love 3
Link to comment

 

The plaintiff/sister in the boat case has some really messed up teeth.  They were all jumbled together which could be the cause of strange looking mouth.  The stud in her lip is not a good look for her either.

OMG I was thinking the plaintiff was semi-normal (except the lip stud) and then during the hallterview she opened her mouth and I flew right off the sofa! Looked like somebody knocked all her teefies out and threw them back in willy nilly in her mouth! I was about to yell "Yahtzee!" from all those dicey looking teefs!

 

The defendant in the rerun case looked like the Good Ship Lollipop sailed without her. 

 

And if we're talking hilarious names, I'm throwing in Imogene Poots (not a JJ name but hilarious nevertheless). In case you're wondering, in Southern culture "poots" is synonymous with "farts". And Imogene is bad enough on its own. 

 

 

Static filled my head watching this and I'm pretty sure that's the permanent condition of these characters. She's disabled?

I was originally thinking maybe she was on some kind of medication for her "migraines" but after a few minutes I realized she must have been on a handful of other pills that she shared with the defendant. There were a well matched pair though, lmao

  • Love 5
Link to comment

Ye puppies. In a rerun where mom and daughter have some sort of car payment dispute, the daughter has a Cindy Brady hairdo - unnaturally blonde (the dye job starts just above her ears) sausage ringlets. Is she trying to look 6 years old?

 

Shirley Temple

 

 

Curly-Top-shirley-temple-27180112-500-37

  • Love 4
Link to comment

Never forget: Kokka Coleman.

 

ETA:

 

 


And Imogene is bad enough on its own.

 

 

"I beg to differ."

 

hPmh8Pi.jpg

 

 

 

Edited by Guest
Link to comment

AngelaHunter, did you mean to leave off Crystal Methhead, or whatever her name was?   And Patti - too hysterical with the "teefies" and Yahtzee!! OMG. So very sorry I missed that episode!  (Screencap, anyone?) 

Love coming here for a daily dose of laughter.

Edited by SandyToes
  • Love 2
Link to comment

Proud Mother - Two sisters fight over a car.  The mother is on the defendant sister side.  What was wrong with her?  She spent her whole 15 minutes of fame making bizarre passive-aggressive grimaces.  Surprise!  She is estranged from the plaintiff daughter!  Being estranged from this fruit loop mother sounds like a good life strategy.  Driving for 6 years without a license, racking up the speeding tickets, and totaling a car while drunk, is NOT a good life strategy.  I wasn't crazy about the defendant knowingly selling a car to someone without a license, and defrauding the insurance, but at least she didn't seem mentally unbalanced like the defendant's side.  3 gavels for memorable facial contortions.

 

There Goes That Smile Again - The defendant was having the time of his life while the plaintiffs described (1) their dreaded fear of his vicious pitbull, (2) how they wouldn't go near it without a baseball bat in hand (3) the raging beast breaking his chain, (4) the serious injury to their own stupid dog and (5) the very prolonged misery of said dog.  What a knee-slapper this was for him!  That big winsome smile like a happy audience member at the comedy improv three quarters of the way down his cocktail sure charmed Judge Judy... NOT!  Twelve gavels for each smile, minus 4 gavels for each JJ mention of said smile, minus 3 gavels for each day of suffering of the victimized dog, plus one gavel for a baseball bat, divided by two dogs, that makes 3 gavels.

  • Love 4
Link to comment

 

Twelve gavels for each smile, minus 4 gavels for each JJ mention of said smile, minus 3 gavels for each day of suffering of the victimized dog, plus one gavel for a baseball bat, divided by two dogs, that makes 3 gavels.

Gavel Algebra- I like it!!!!

  • Love 1
Link to comment

Proud Mother - Two sisters fight over a car.

 

Tychala and Shria!  Both of them looked older than their dumb mother which was mildly interesting. All you other JJ litigants - go to Minnesota, where one doesn't need a license to buy, rent or drive a car, as long as you tell the officer who stops you (for speeding, drunk driving ,etc) your name and he checks it off! Well, something like that.

 

JJ: "You're not smart enough to get a license in six years." That helped to wipe the dopey grin off the moon face of Shria.

  • Love 6
Link to comment

Can somebody from Minnesota tell us whether or not it is true that you can buy a car in Minnesota without a license (at some place called Car Hop), and that, when the cops pull you over and you tell them you don't have a license, they just let you go

  • Love 4
Link to comment

Tychala and Shria!  Both of them looked older than their dumb mother which was mildly interesting. All you other JJ litigants - go to Minnesota, where one doesn't need a license to buy, rent or drive a car, as long as you tell the officer who stops you (for speeding, drunk driving ,etc) your name and he checks it off! Well, something like that.

 

JJ: "You're not smart enough to get a license in six years." That helped to wipe the dopey grin off the moon face of Shria.

I suspect since she had the insurance card in the sister's name she gave the cop her sister's birthdate and he ran it to see if the license was valid. If so, he let her go. The defendant sort of smirked when Judy asked why she wasn't ticketed and she mentioned the insurance card, that gave me a clue.

  • Love 7
Link to comment

Can somebody from Minnesota tell us whether or not it is true that you can buy a car in Minnesota without a license (at some place called Car Hop), and that, when the cops pull you over and you tell them you don't have a license, they just let you go

Car Hop! They sponsor Judge Judy's program in my area. Their snappy jingle: "Caaaaaar Hop! Cars an' credit to go!" A down payment of $99 (and who knows what kind of usurious interest) gets you your very own vee-hickle to drive off the lot.

 

I had no idea that car dealers in any state could sell to unlicensed customers.

 

One gavel to Tychala's red-shirted witness who stood up (apropos to nothing) and was summarily shot down by JJ -- "like fish in a barrel". 

  • Love 3
Link to comment

 some place called Car Hop...

i've seen ads for that (thanks to a broken ankle I've watched way too much daytime/late night TV lately). Seems to be a chain of used car dealers with ads that would trigger a great John Oliver rant - $99 down even if you have bad credit or no credit! With fine print saying not all people will qualify, of course.

  • Love 3
Link to comment

$99 down even if you have bad credit or no credit! With fine print saying not all people will qualify, of course.

 

If they gave Shria a car it's hard imagine who would NOT qualify.

 

One gavel to Tychala's red-shirted witness who stood up

 

Ooh, I forgot about Mr.Regan, who jumped up like his ass was on fire and when asked what he had to say, just stood there with his jaw hanging open. "Sit down!"

  • Love 3
Link to comment

There Goes That Smile Again - The defendant was having the time of his life while the plaintiffs described (1) their dreaded fear of his vicious pitbull, (2) how they wouldn't go near it without a baseball bat in hand (3) the raging beast breaking his chain, (4) the serious injury to their own stupid dog and (5) the very prolonged misery of said dog. What a knee-slapper this was for him! That big winsome smile like a happy audience member at the comedy improv three quarters of the way down his cocktail sure charmed Judge Judy... NOT! Twelve gavels for each smile, minus 4 gavels for each JJ mention of said smile, minus 3 gavels for each day of suffering of the victimized dog, plus one gavel for a baseball bat, divided by two dogs, that makes 3 gavels.

I sincerely hope the defendant watches this episode; self-awareness is a beautiful thing. He was soo adamant that he wasn't smiling when he actually was. Talk about inappropriate affect.

  • Love 2
Link to comment

One of my closest friends smiles and laughs when she gets nervous. The defendant in the (yet another) dog case seemed demented, like it was beyond a nervous tic.

I recently bought a new car, and I think I was only asked for my license when I was test driving, which was weeks before I bought it, and at a different dealership than the one I ended up buying from. I bought it from a dealership out of town and had it delivered to me here, and I don't think they checked my license at all.

I did give them my proof of insurance for the lien-holder, but I don't remember them asking anything about my license. Maybe they assumed I was licensed since I had insurance in my name.

Anyway, there were no winners in the car case. I was hoping JJ wouldn't award anyone anything since both sides had unclean hands. The plaintiff was guilty of giving an unlicensed driver the means to get on the road and ruin someone's life. I couldn't muster up an ounce of sympathy for either side.

  • Love 2
Link to comment

You don't have to have a license to buy a car.  You do have to have a license to drive a car, and the car must be insured.  There are many circumstances under which a person who does not drive would buy a car; on the insurance for the vehicle, they are listed as an excluded driver.  Happens all the time. 

  • Love 2
Link to comment

I honestly don't think the sister knew her sister didn't have a license. She was 21 and the sister was 24. The older sister moved out at 18. I think my  younger sister has a valid license. I see her driving around in a car she owns and I know she makes car payments.  I wasn't actually around when she was licensed. If I saw someone driving a car and getting tickets I would assume they had a license, actually I wouldn't think about it at all.

  • Love 10
Link to comment

 

I did give them my proof of insurance for the lien-holder, but I don't remember them asking anything about my license. Maybe they assumed I was licensed since I had insurance in my name.

Probably because who's going to have insurance but no license?  There are more people with licenses but no insurance (learnt that on JJ ya know). They probably ran your license before you took a test drive - and I'm guessing you didn't buy your car at Car Hop! lol

 

I was sad I missed the two sisters (bad weather no signal, thanks DISH)  I got the impression from the 30 seconds I was able to watch that the plaintiff was in the military or security? She had that tight clipped-off way of answering the few questions I heard  - and the sister was the dumb ass she was tired of bailing out. 

 

I like Toaster Strudel's algebra problem but I would have deducted one gavel because I would have rapped the defendant right between the eyes with it for smiling. IMHO he didn't look nervous, he looked like an asshole. 

  • Love 4
Link to comment
(edited)

Genitals In The Storm - A 25 yr old that started his family of three little miracles when he was 18, with three different women, and was locked up for two years, is being sued for a child-support related loan.  What a prince!  Of course the mother of two that was renting a room with the same relative as him would fall in love on the first day he moved in! Swoon!  His back child support payments alone would have any of us old hags wringing our panties. Three wage-garnished gavels.

 

Rock Tosser Tossed Out - What was that?  Mother admits to starting a rock throwing fight with her fresh adult son, who retaliated with a bunch more pebble throwing, then escalated to tossing fistfuls of stones, ending with six stitches on the forehead of the spectating sister.  JJ tossed out the mother along with her nasty 'tude.  Aye!  Can't they find jobs at the local quarry?  Three granite gravels.

Edited by Toaster Strudel
  • Love 7
Link to comment

Gotta love JJ's questions.  Upon hearing that the dopey defendant has three kids from three different women: "Don't you have any other hobbies, Mr. Wiliams?"  He claims that he won't have any other children - let's not hold our breath waiting for that one to come true (plus, the girlfriend looked pregnant). Folks like that disgust me, but they also let me know that my friends who are still teaching in the trenches of Special Education have job security.

 

We don't know how tanning works.  I was wondering why he was interested in getting a tan. Oh wait, Tannif?  Then to the rock fight....it was described like a snowball fight. Do they keep an arsenal of rocks around, so they'll be ready when these fights break out?  But then I heard their hallterview....shit, maybe this is the way to go? The son said that they were always a close family, and he loves them. The mother said her son wanted to fight like people in the streets, so she obliged. Then, the mother was ready to keep it movin --- she's already planning a loving 2015 Christmas morning with the whole fam!  My mother has some screws loose and is currently fighting me (no rocks....yet. But it is the kind of stuff you'd see on JJ). Maybe I should just start collecting rocks now, schedule a fight, and then be done with all the nonsense.

 

I must say that I do enjoy the rerun case that's on the second episode, with the scary/angry refrigerator wife of professional liar DeSean "Carlos" Marquez and his medical office mistress.

Edited by CoolWhipLite
  • Love 4
Link to comment

What a prince!

 

Don't be hasty. Did you really look at Travis? Did you listen to him speaking? If you had, you'd understand why so many women couldn't help throwing themselves at him and begging for his golden seed. Plaintiff was pretty silly to offer Travis and his new squeeze - who started breeding at 17 - a place to stay. Really, what did she expect?

 

I have to say that after watching the Jacksons I am so happy that my family (which may have been slightly disfunctional) never settled any disputes by throwing rocks. In fact, I can't remember a single incident where my mother threw a rock at me. Of course if she had, I would have tossed back just pebbles to make sure I didn't really injure her, you understand.

 

I must say that I do enjoy the rerun case that's on the second episode, with the scary/angry refrigerator wife of professional liar DeSean "Carlos" Marquez and his medical office mistress.

 

Ha! I had forgotten all about those bunch of fucking idiots. Honestly, if I were Sheri, I would have paid the medical bills for my injuries inflicted by the beastly Mrs. Marquez rather than tell the whole world I was totally infatuated with the irresistable DeSean "Carlos" "Mighty Joe Young" Marquez and admit in front of my daughter that I went for booty calls with him at some (no doubt) seedy No-Tell Motel. I really REALLY hope that Mrs. Marquez gave her honey a real ass-kicking. She looks like just the person who could do it.

  • Love 3
Link to comment

Before I forget, the first episode today included Googly-Eyes from afar.  I have finally worked out who she looks like!  Check all the pictures of her on this link!

 

Theda Bara http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theda_Bara

 

Except for I don't think Theda Bara had an adam's apple.

HAHAHA  lol!!  Just give Theda's bangs a blunt cut and stick her in the courtroom's gallery, and it's Googly-Eyes! 

 

All jokes aside, that was a fascinating read.

  • Love 3
Link to comment

OH MY GOD  I had forgotten the despicable Marquez couple!  ARGH I cannot tell you the depth of my hatred for these two: Him, for being a smug cockhound and cheater who doesn't wear his ring and BIG FAT LIAR, and his wife who just can't and won't comprehend that her precious penis-person has cheated on her regularly. GAH!  The other woman didn't take any vows, YOUR HUSBAND DID.

  • Love 6
Link to comment

smug cockhound and cheater who doesn't wear his ring and BIG FAT LIAR

 

And why not? Try to imagine how many women want some 'o that!

 

Maybe it's just me, but if I had a boyfriend who suggested we go to a hotel to get it on, I might get a  niggling suspicion that perhaps he's not free after all. Especially a hunk of burning love like DeSean "Carlos". That's the problem with having a man so desirable. You have to understand that other women want him too.

 

Except for I don't think Theda Bara had an adam's apple.

 

The Adam's apple, the Dutchboy hairdo and the spinster librarian outfit are...interesting.

  • Love 5
Link to comment

 

Probably because who's going to have insurance but no license?  There are more people with licenses but no insurance (learnt that on JJ ya know). They probably ran your license before you took a test drive - and I'm guessing you didn't buy your car at Car Hop! lol

No. Until yesterday, I'd never heard of the Car Hop!

 

A lot of people have insurance and no licenses. This happens with my clients. Their license will get suspended or cancelled, and the insurance company doesn't find out until they re-run their MVR, which may not happen until renewal. Of course, they claim not to know their licenses were suspended. What happens here is people will get a camera ticket and ignore it. Then the DMV will suspend their license. (Full disclosure: I'm talking about commercial policies. I have no idea if personal insurance companies run MVRs more frequently than that. Unlike many JJ litigants, I've never had a license suspended, revoked, cancelled, used as someone else's ID in a traffic stop, etc.)

  • Love 3
Link to comment

 

A lot of people have insurance and no licenses. This happens with my clients. Their license will get suspended or cancelled, and the insurance company doesn't find out until they re-run their MVR, which may not happen until renewal.

I stand corrected. I live in Florida and once your license gets revoked they send a notice to your insurance company immediately. Likewise, if your insurance lapses, they send a notice ASAP to the DMV. And in Florida if you have unpaid tickets they can put out a warrant for you. ( My daughter who was 18 at the time got a ticket for running a stale light - one of her friends at work told her that her boyfriend who worked for a lawyer would get her ticket cancelled if she gave him $50 - she got a "your license is being revoked by tonight, we're sending your ins co a notice -  and we're issuing a warrant for you" notice in the mail  (she had a clean driving record up to that point). Obviously co-workers BF was a big fat liar , and DD had to go to the DMV at the last minute and pay $130 for the ticket and deal with the freak-out factor that she nearly got her license revoked for one ticket. Of course that doesn't mean that people don't break the law and drive on their cousin's sister's babysitter's baby daddy's insurance. 

 

The lovely rock-throwing family made me laugh. I wanna show up to their house on Xmas with a bottle of vodka, wait and hour and watch the shenanigans begin. 

  • Love 3
Link to comment

I stand corrected. I live in Florida and once your license gets revoked they send a notice to your insurance company immediately. Likewise, if your insurance lapses, they send a notice ASAP to the DMV. And in Florida if you have unpaid tickets they can put out a warrant for you. ( My daughter who was 18 at the time got a ticket for running a stale light - one of her friends at work told her that her boyfriend who worked for a lawyer would get her ticket cancelled if she gave him $50 - she got a "your license is being revoked by tonight, we're sending your ins co a notice -  and we're issuing a warrant for you" notice in the mail  (she had a clean driving record up to that point). Obviously co-workers BF was a big fat liar , and DD had to go to the DMV at the last minute and pay $130 for the ticket and deal with the freak-out factor that she nearly got her license revoked for one ticket. Of course that doesn't mean that people don't break the law and drive on their cousin's sister's babysitter's baby daddy's insurance. 

I wish they did that here. We have a ton of uninsured drivers and a ton of unlicensed drivers. My uninsured motorists premium is higher than my liability premium for the first time in my driving life. It's insanity.

  • Love 2
Link to comment

 

Genitals In The Storm -

and the girlfriends teefs.  It looked like she had filed them to little points (what was left).  

With JJ's father being a dentist - why does she not just stroke out on the bench with the some of the teef issues that come in front of her?

  • Love 3
Link to comment

Don't be hasty. Did you really look at Travis? Did you listen to him speaking? If you had, you'd understand why so many women couldn't help throwing themselves at him and begging for his golden seed. Plaintiff was pretty silly to offer Travis and his new squeeze - who started breeding at 17 - a place to stay. Really, what did she expect?

 

I have to say that after watching the Jacksons I am so happy that my family (which may have been slightly disfunctional) never settled any disputes by throwing rocks. In fact, I can't remember a single incident where my mother threw a rock at me. Of course if she had, I would have tossed back just pebbles to make sure I didn't really injure her, you understand.

 

Ha! I had forgotten all about those bunch of fucking idiots. Honestly, if I were Sheri, I would have paid the medical bills for my injuries inflicted by the beastly Mrs. Marquez rather than tell the whole world I was totally infatuated with the irresistable DeSean "Carlos" "Mighty Joe Young" Marquez and admit in front of my daughter that I went for booty calls with him at some (no doubt) seedy No-Tell Motel. I really REALLY hope that Mrs. Marquez gave her honey a real ass-kicking. She looks like just the person who could do it.

 

Speak? I thought something was wrong with my hearing because he sounded like he was talking with his mouthful of mush!

 

In my family we have a saying "Rocks don't hurt people. People hurt people."

 

Don't forget, Sheri also went to Carlos' home and probably did some horizontal bumping there too. I was waiting for JJ to have Carlos testify. But she just let him sit there looking constipated.

Edited by Milz
  • Love 3
Link to comment

Speak? I thought something was wrong with my hearing because he sounded like he was talking with his mouthful of mush!

 

Exactly! It seems there are places on this continent where incoherent, moronic muttering and drawling is hawt enough to get women panting with lust.

 

I was waiting for JJ to have Carlos testify. But she just let him sit there looking constipated.

 

For which I was grateful. Mrs. Carlos was way more than enough, with her, "It's not my fault she don't know how to fight."  I gasped along with the audience.

  • Love 4
Link to comment

Exactly! It seems there are places on this continent where incoherent, moronic muttering and drawling is hawt enough to get women panting with lust.

 

 

Mush Mouth: Hey, mumble mumble mumble,  for me?

 

What he really said "Hey, I don't have money. Can you buy this drink for me?"

 

What she hears "Hey, I admire your intelligence, beauty and demeanor. You're the only goddess for me?"

 

Mush Mouth: Mumble, mumble, mumble, mumble, baby.

 

What he really said: "I'm currently unable to support myself let alone a family, perhaps one day maybe"

 

What she hears "I love you. I love you. I love you. Let's have a baby."

Edited by Milz
  • Love 8
Link to comment
What she hears "I love you. I love you. I love you. Let's have a baby."

I think that's giving these people too much credit. I think it's more, "Let's f**k" because they are too stupid to even know how babies are made. 

 

And can someone help me out? My "Delete This Recording" finger acted a little too hastily and I mistakenly deleted the fantastic rerun episode (I think it was from Tuesday?) starring the plaintiff who looked EXACTLY like Pamela Smart vs. her ex-boyfriend (who she lived with for 18 years without every marrying) over a repossessed 20+-year-old car. His glamorous girlfriend (who I believe was named Jessica Rodriguez) called Pam Smart, Jr. out in her hallterview: "She needs to go to the Lemon Tree and CUT THAT MULLET!" Then she threatened her with some physical violence because why not. Anyway -- anyone catch the plaintiff's name? I was all set to Google her and then I erased the episode! Grr!

Edited by Guest
Link to comment

 

 

Mush Mouth: Hey, mumble mumble mumble,  for me?

What he really said "Hey, I don't have money. Can you buy this drink for me?"

What she hears "Hey, I admire your intelligence, beauty and demeanor. You're the only goddess for me?"

Mush Mouth: Mumble, mumble, mumble, mumble, baby.

What he really said: "I'm currently unable to support myself let alone a family, perhaps one day maybe"

What she hears "I love you. I love you. I love you. Let's have a baby."

LMAO-  now I have to stop to clean the tea off my screen.  That is one of the most astute explanations of the women of JJ Land!

Link to comment

 

I wish they did that here. We have a ton of uninsured drivers and a ton of unlicensed drivers. My uninsured motorists premium is higher than my liability premium for the first time in my driving life. It's insanity.

In my decades on the road I have been hit 4 times.  3 were uninsured and 2 of those had no license.  It's been several years since the last one, now my suburb outside Dallas does instant towing if there is no proof of insurance at an accident.  If I am ever in the position again and the hitter is uninsured, I am going to stand on the road making faces like a four year old.  I will loudly be saying "Nanner, Nanner, Nanner" as the car is hooked up!

Edited by zillabreeze
  • Love 5
Link to comment

I think it's more, "Let's f**k" because they are too stupid to even know how babies are made.

 

It seems that way. How many women have we heard say, "I found out I was pregnant", as though it never occured to them that could be a consequence of banging some loser night and day every time he gets out on parole? Birth control? What for?

  • Love 3
Link to comment

 

Ooh, I forgot about Mr.Regan, who jumped up like his ass was on fire and when asked what he had to say, just stood there with his jaw hanging open. "Sit down!"

 

 

   I was in a therapy group last night and this poor woman was crying her heart out about all the terrible things that have happened to her over twenty years.

 

   I was trying to think of something else and for some strange reason I thought of Angela's post  about Mr. Regan and had the hardest time not laughing....I grabbed for my ice tea and pretended I had to cough which gave me a reason to leave the room.

 

  I did laugh all the way home. 

 

Edited by PsychoKlown
Link to comment

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...