S03.E13: The Big Apple of Nathan's Eye

[IndianPaintbrush]

 

A few of the Bates are heading to the Big Apple to visit their friends, Ashley and Anastasia. The city girls show our country boys, Nathan and Lawson, all the exciting sites of the city. They explore Times Square, take a walk across the Brooklyn Bridge, and go ice-skating where Nathan asks an important question.

I'm really looking forward to learning more about Ashley. Here are some photos of the happy couple:

Front-hugging!

Ashley's parents place

Ice skating at Rockefeller Center

Christmas at the Bates

 

So funny that Nathan wore his cowboy hat ice skating.  It's like he was determined to stick out amongst all the city folk.

[BitterApple]

Front hugging?! Ashley, you Jezebel! Run, Nathan, run, before she completely corrupts your soul!

On a completely shallow note, they're a really attractive couple and Bradley is so freaking cute I can't take it.

[Hero]

Aw... they make a cute couple. They both look really happy when they are together. 

 

Bradley is super adorable!

[Sew Sumi]

Front hugging but no hand holding? I don't get these people! 

 

Cute pics! 

[Autumn0516]

I loved this episode. Nathan and Ashley are so cute. I can't believe how touchy feely they get to be.

The end, with all of the family together, was nice. I loved their reactions to Brandon and Michael and John and Alyssa. It was cute to see the babies all getting passed around. Trace had Bradley at one point, and Chad with Allie.

The Bates are just so much more enjoyable to watch than that other family. The kids all have personalities, and you can tell that Gil and Kelly really trust them (to a certain extent) to make their own rules in a relationship.

We may not share many beliefs, but I can't argue that these aren't really nice people who love each other and have a joy for life.

[Patricia07]

I've only watched about 10 minutes of this, but I just have to comment.  I get the feeling that Nathan expects Ashley to adapt, but he's not willing to adapt.

[IndianPaintbrush]

They're adorable together - and so much energy!  But yeah, I get the feeling that Nathan would never even consider moving to NY for her.

 

The good thing is that Ashley gives as good as she gets.  She wasn't afraid to defend NY or joke around with the boys.  I don't think she'll become a Stepford wife.

 

I don't get why Nathan was so worried about everything looking like a proposal.  Don't get me wrong, it totally did - but Ashley should know how they do things by now.  I wonder if her own family doesn't do the silly courtship thing.  

Edited April 8, 2016 by IndianPaintbrush

[andromeda331]

I've only watched about 10 minutes of this, but I just have to comment.  I get the feeling that Nathan expects Ashley to adapt, but he's not willing to adapt.

So did I. I do think Ashley defended NY pretty well but I kept getting the feeling that he was expecting

her to change from city girl to a country girl. And that he wouldn't really have to adapt to anything.

I agree about Bradley. He is so adorable. Even though I expect it still to come I was surprise there

was no announcement about season four.

[birkenstock]

There should be a season 4.  Alyssa posted pictures from Allie Jane's first bday party on instagram with the hashtags bringupbates season 4. Lawson also posted a picture from the bday party with cameramen in frame. I wonder when it will come back - maybe June-ish?  It's getting interesting.  

 

Great season finale.  It's such a contrast from the Duggar courtships and Michaela and Brandon's interactions. Nathan and Ashley are comfortable with each other and have normal physical contact.  I like that Ashley doesn't just keep sweet.  I hope they film more of Ashley's family and her life in New York.  She's a chatty Cathy in her talking heads but its seems natural rather than fame driven. 

 

I agree that Nathan isn't going to adapt to city life.  Ashley at least laid out her needs by saying that she couldn't be too isolated.  Hopefully that means Nathan will give a little in the relationship in terms of where they live.  

 

The whole getting-to-know-you/pre-courtship phase is confusing. They were already bf/gf and Nathan said multiple times that he loved Ashley.  It seems that Nathan and Ashley's version of courtship is pre-engagement and that him asking was a minor formality.  It makes sense why he would make a bigger deal about the courtship since they were a legitimate couple and he wanted her to feel special. I did laugh when he said really quickly that the earrings box was not a ring.  Nathan doesn't seem ready for marriage so I wonder how long their courtship and engagement will be.  

[Katydid]

Take notes, Duggars.  I haven't really been keeping up with the Bates show, but caught this episode last night and found Ashley and Nathan delightfully refreshing compared to the typical forced, awkward "courtship" scenarios that we usually see.  I enjoyed the Cowboy/Big City Girl dynamic, though I agree that growing up in such wildly different surroundings, with each seeming to be very attached to his/her own locale, could potentially be a challenge for them.  Maybe I'm being too optimistic here, but they seem grounded enough that they would break off the courtship if it looked like they weren't going to be able to come up with a living situation that both would be comfortable with. 

[flyingdi]

You know, I think I could watch a Whole hour of the Judson and Jeb Show. Those two are so freaking adorable!

[flyingdi]

When they were packing Lawson even told Nathan he needs to learn to be adaptable. I also enjoyed seeing how well Lawson got along with Ashley and her sister/mother, whoever they were making plans with. You never see that with the Duggars. They seem afraid to be alone with their in laws in case someone is suddenly overcome with lust.

[Misslindsey]

 

I also enjoyed seeing how well Lawson got along with Ashley and her sister/mother, whoever they were making plans with. You never see that with the Duggars. They seem afraid to be alone with their in laws in case someone is suddenly overcome with lust.

I liked that Kelly basically did not think Nathan and Ashley alone in the carriage was a big deal. If that was the Duggar's, Michelle would have been sitting in the middle between Nathan and Ashley.

[IndianPaintbrush]

I forgot to add - it was fun watching Ashley and Erin make Asian noodles together.  Erin continues to impress me with her willingness to try new things.  I don't know if she was already pregnant at that point, but good for her for going to New York without Chad.

[Barb23]

Front hugging but no hand holding? I don't get these people! 

 

Cute pics!

There was plenty of hand holding & the camera seemed to lock on their hands together many times. I was glad to see it was normal hand holding - not the hand sex that the Duggar couples seem to favor. I was secretly hoping they would share a kiss or two. Nothing fancy, just a little peck would have been nice to see. I'm sure they both wanted to kiss esp during the carriage ride. I don't see them making it to their wedding day for their first kiss, as well as other things. Lol. I liked how Kelly didn't make a big deal of things. (Like MEchelle having a stroke on Benessa's hand holding.)

Nathan has to learn you have to be careful in handing over your phone/camera to a stranger to have your picture taken or you may not see said phone again. I'm sure that part was set up & camera crew was right there but all I could think of was when Clark Griswald handed his movie camera to a stranger in the European Vacation movie. I did like the picture of them on the bridge. The noodle making looked fun & is one of those things that seems so easy when done by someone else.

That was nice the whole family was there for the Christmas party. I did notice that Michaela was still clinging to Brandon.

[Fuzzysox]

I really liked last night's epi. Nathan picked a girl that is very much like his sisters, lively and talkative. She seemed very put together and mature. I loved her welcoming nature and I'm pretty sure she will fit right in with the Bateseseseses!

 

The whole family is 1,000 x better than the other family. They are real have real human interactions and just have a good time. I hope they get a season #4.

[BitterApple]

Darn. I wish UP had recent full episodes on their website. We recently moved into a temporary house and we don't get the channel anymore.

I've seen brief clips of Ashley and Nathan together and they're adorable, but in my experience extreme opposites don't play out well in the long term. I'm interested to see how things go once they're out of the "first love where everything is new and exciting" stage and have to settle into real life.

[IndianPaintbrush]

I wouldn't call them extreme opposites, as they have very similar personalities and religious/moral values.  Not saying it will be easy, but they can overcome the geography part with some compromise.

[Bajovane]

Man, oh man, the differences between the Bates and Duggars really came out with this episode.  Nathan and Ashley not only do full on, squishy frontal hugs, but they held hands even BEFORE they were officially courting.  It is refreshing to see how natural and normal they seem with each other.  They know each other very well and I believe they will be very happy together.  It won't be too long before an engagement is announced.

Ma and Pa Duggar would be utterly scandalized if their kids were like that!!

[Clemgo3165]

I wouldn't call them extreme opposites, as they have very similar personalities and religious/moral values.  Not saying it will be easy, but they can overcome the geography part with some compromise.

 

I thought the same. At the heart of it, they have very similar values and both are outgoing and energetic, willing to try new things. They'll have a great time together. Geography is an issue, but if Ashley can settle for a smaller city, say Knoxville, then he could have some land and be close to his family and she could be within 10 minutes of a mall. It's not NYC but it's not the holler either.

 

I was just happy to see a group of young adults who seem to openly care for one another, have some ambition outside of the home, and who are interested in the world outside their front door. Kelly and Gil allow their kids much more freedom and so far none of them have turned into heathens.

Edited April 8, 2016 by Clemgo3165

[Sew Sumi]

I like Ashley's spunk. I just hope country living doesn't diminish her shine. I also hope Nathan can be brought to a compromise.

And then there's Lawson. Could he chew up the camera any more? I get it in the skating bit, but obnoxiously counting the boy/girl votes, and his behavior at Ashley's home had me rolling my eyes.

[BitterApple]

I like Ashley's spunk. I just hope country living doesn't diminish her shine. I also hope Nathan can be brought to a compromise.

And then there's Lawson. Could he chew up the camera any more? I get it in the skating bit, but obnoxiously counting the boy/girl votes, and his behavior at Ashley's home had me rolling my eyes.

I think Lawson's head is seriously gassed up by all the girls on his Instagram who tell him how handsome he is. I noticed he's big on posting pictures of himself with Carson and Bradley, and the cynical part of me wonders if he does it solely for the "awwww" factor. The more I see of him, the less I like him.

[Hero]

Lawson is so obnoxious. He's similar to Carson in which they both love to be the center of attention.

Nathan has really pretty eyes. He ans Ashley are a very attractive couple.

It's so refreshing how both of the families interacted with each other. There was no awkward silences and they seem to enjoy each other.

[Micks Picks]

Some things the Bateseseses do that the Duggars don't is smile, laugh, explore, experiment, be free and easy, and enjoy the things and variety of people the good Lord provided for them.

[absolutelyido]

For all their faults, I like that Gil and Kelly both seem to actually like children. Kelly is often shown holding her children and her grandchildren. I haven't ever seen any of the kids look at them as if they wonder who the heck these people are and why are they around me with the cameras.

I think Gil and Kelly just adore children. When they arrived at Ashley's house, Kelly immediately took the baby that Ashley's Mom was holding. Later, while the others were decorating Kelly & Gil were sitting on the couch. Kelly was holding Carson and Gil was giving a bottle to the baby (not sure if the baby was Ashley's sibling or one of their daycare kids).

 

Great season finale.  It's such a contrast from the Duggar courtships and Michaela and Brandon's interactions. Nathan and Ashley are comfortable with each other and have normal physical contact.

I agree that Michaela and Brandon always seem really stiff and formal, and really not all that much fun. But, at least they do seemed well matched in their personalities. From what we see, it really seems like each of the married kids have spouses that they are well suited to because it seems like they actually had an opportunity to get to know each other really well before marriage.

 

I just love this family. They are fun to watch because of the fun they have with each other.

Edited April 8, 2016 by absolutelyido

[Barb23]

I like Ashley's spunk. I just hope country living doesn't diminish her shine. I also hope Nathan can be brought to a compromise.

And then there's Lawson. Could he chew up the camera any more? I get it in the skating bit, but obnoxiously counting the boy/girl votes, and his behavior at Ashley's home had me rolling my eyes.

You nailed it with the word "spunk." Even tho you were describing a non-Bates, "spunk" is what the Duggar kids seem to be missing. Well we know Jana had spunk when she was younger but that was taken from her.

[Absolom]

Ratings:  210K viewers and a .06 rating.

[riverblue22]

Wow there was a lot of hugging in that show--good for them!  I thought they were going to kiss, and I don't know how they will get to the altar kiss-free.  Again, good for them!

 

Anybody know what Nathan does for a living?  Somehow I think he is in the tree business with his dad.  I hope it's something else that he can transfer to a more urban location.  Ashley is more sophisticated and I don't see her in the boonies.

[cereality]

I like them. I like their method of dating -- holding hands, hugging etc. I like that when they were going on the carriage ride, Lawson said "this carriage doesn't have a 3rd seat" and Nathan was quick to shut it down and say -- that's ok, I only need 2 seats. I like that when they were at Bryant Park, they were skating by themselves without his brother or her sister 6 inches behind them to listen to conversation. I like that after they announced the courtship, Gil, Kelly and Erin left and gave Nathan an extra day with his girlfriend (with Lawson in tow).

 

I don't understand OTOH what they possibly have in common. I realize they share the same faith and beliefs, but he is a true country boy and she is a true NYC girl. She was quick to point out -- more than once -- how "country" he was dressed; she seemed a bit embarrassed of his huge cowboy hat. When asked whether she could give up the city, she said she wants some "elbow room" and can't be 70 miles from the closest shopping mall -- when New Yorkers say that, that tends to mean they'd be ok with a house in NJ not in Rocky Top. And he's totally un/underexposed -- at the Chinese restaurants, she was saying to him that this would broaden his horizons, as he pushed his food around the plate. He struggled to explain or understand what a crepe is. I just don't get how two such opposites will make it work, and for her sake, after the newness of marriage and s*x wears off, I hope he understands that rural Tenn. will NOT make his wife happy in the long term and opts to at least move her to Knoxville or Nashville -- where there is plenty of shopping and at least decent Chinese and Mexican food.

 

For as unexposed as this family is, they seemed to handle NYC well. You could tell Kelly, Gil and Nathan are NOT into NYC -- they pretty much said it when they got off the plane. Yet all 3 seemed to like the boat tour; Kelly seemed excited for Chinatown and both Kelly and Gil seemed to like the food; Gil and Nathan seemed to love the ice cream place and Gil was even filming how they were making the ice cream.

 

I LOVED Erin. She seemed to dive right into everything. She was very honest that they rarely try new foods and if they do it's always American, and yet she was chowing down at the restaurant and jumped right in to try making the noodles. And even said -- I can get it with practice, I'm going to do it all the time at home and Chad's going to be wondering why we have noodles all the time!!

[BitterApple]

Cereality, I wonder if their lack of trying new food has something to do with the fact that, until a few years ago, this family was dirt poor. Pre-tv, going out to eat was probably a once in a blue moon occasion. I guess it would make sense that they'd go for what they know, rather than risk wasting money on exotic quisine the kids may not like.

My brother and his wife lived in Manhattan for ten years and when they bought a house in Brooklyn, they talked about it as if they were moving to a foreign country. Ashley strikes me as having a Carrie Bradshaw-style attachment to New York. Idk, she just comes off a lot smarter and more sophisticated than Nathan, and I'm not saying it in a geography snob kind of way. Hopefully they can reach a compromise, and Nathan isn't thinking that she'll love Rocky Top once she gets used to it. Because I don't see that happening, lol.

[cereality]

Cereality, I wonder if their lack of trying new food has something to do with the fact that, until a few years ago, this family was dirt poor. Pre-tv, going out to eat was probably a once in a blue moon occasion. I guess it would make sense that they'd go for what they know, rather than risk wasting money on exotic quisine the kids may not like.

My brother and his wife lived in Manhattan for ten years and when they bought a house in Brooklyn, they talked about it as if they were moving to a foreign country. Ashley strikes me as having a Carrie Bradshaw-style attachment to New York. Idk, she just comes off a lot smarter and more sophisticated than Nathan, and I'm not saying it in a geography snob kind of way. Hopefully they can reach a compromise, and Nathan isn't thinking that she'll love Rocky Top once she gets used to it. Because I don't see that happening, lol.

I bet you're right re new foods. I always forget that this isn't a family that's wealthy due to yrs of being on TV. They were living off of Gil's tree business and probably didn't have a whole lot for extras with 19 kids. I bet eating out was a special treat for birthdays and anniversaries and then they'd pick the restaurants they know everyone would like, rather than venturing out for Chinese or sushi and having some kids be disappointed.

 

Ashley comes across like a born and raised New Yorker. I lived in NYC for 10 yrs and even I got attached, even though I never loved it. But the born and raised New Yorkers think NOTHING is better and think EVERYPLACE besides the 5 boroughs is the boonies; to them Long Island or New Jersey is an adjustment so I can't even imagine the adjustment to Rocky Top. I think she'll be ok for a while. She's young and in love and will be over the moon to follow her young, sexy (to her) husband anywhere. Plus there are a lot of sisters in law to get to know, and I think many of them match her loud, fun personality well -- esp. Tori, Carlin, Josie, and Erin to a certain extent though she isn't loud. So I think the transition to marriage, keeping her own home, and hanging with the big family may make her happy for a yr or two. After that though -- when every weekend is the same and just involves church and then hanging out at that Bates compound or going to one of the 5 American restaurants or the 1 mall in the next "big" town -- I think she will then start to feel a bit suffocated and wonder if this is what the next 50 yrs will be like. Plus she'll be far from her own family, and I assume she is close to her own 7 (or 9?) siblings.

 

At that point, I think it will be up to Nathan to realize that this is about HIS nuclear family, and not just keeping the life he was raised with. I think Lawson had the right idea when talking to Nathan about clothing -- saying sometimes you have to adapt to where you are, you can do that while still being proud of your own upbringing (when he was trying to talk him out of packing flannel and a cowboy hat for NYC). While Nathan may right now be thinking that once Ashley moves to Rocky Top, she'll get to love it like he does and will just forget about NYC -- the nice thing is that Nathan knows he's marrying a spunky girl who is quick to tell it like it is and doesn't just stare adoringly at him. He knows what spunky girls are like -- he was raised with Tori, Carlin, and Josie. So at some level, I think he realizes he's marrying a girl who views herself as his equal and that means he won't just get to act like the headship of the family and do whatever he wants without considering her. And I also think that having brothers like Lawson and Zach and a brother in law like Chad -- all of whom seem reasonable -- if he were to ever go to them and suggest that Ashely is miserable, all of them would tell him to consider his wife's needs -- rather than telling him, you're the man, who cares what she thinks.

[Sew Sumi]

I hope you're right. Erin is orgasmic over her little shabby chic house in the boonies. I just can't picture Ashley in that lifestyle. Unfortunately, from what I understand, Nathan is toed to the tree business.

I just see Ashley getting absorbed like Whitney and the Duggar spouses.

[cereality]

Erin was raised in that small town, and I think Chad is from a similar small town in Oklahoma -- not from Tulsa or OK City. To them having your own (or rented) shabby chic cottage in the country is a sign that you have arrived -- you are independent of your parents and are raising your kids in their own home with a backyard. I think they love nothing more than Chad doing home renovation projects or being out on the back deck finishing some piece of furniture, while Erin is in the kitchen whipping up dinner -- as they talk to each other thru the kitchen windows. At least that's how I picture their life when Chad is home. Ashley OTOH may want something more than that. I'm sure she'll cook, but somehow I don't see her finding joy in cooking, cleaning and child rearing; she seems like a girl who'll want to be out doing things. And while she'll support Nathan, I don't see her fawning all over some home renovation project he does. It's just that in SUCH a small town, there are only so many places to go and in a few months -- she will have discovered all the nearby shops, theaters etc. Whereas I'd imagine having lived 20+ yrs in NYC, she likely STILL hasn't discovered ALL there is to do -- bc there is so much.

[Barb23]

I don't see Ashley popping out a kid every year either. Even tho she comes from a larger family that does daycare, I just can't picture her doing the 5 kids under the age of 5 thing.

I don't think it's necessary to have a big event planned to ask a person to court. But it is nice that the Bates kids have put more effort into it than Ben asking Jessa Duggar to court in the family closet sized office with both of her parents present. (With Ben holding a drink/coffee cup in his hand.)

[BitterApple]

I actually looked up Rocky Top on Wiki, and damn, there ain't much out there. The population of the town is under 2,000 and a third of the families are below the poverty line. I knew where the Bates lived was rural, but I didn't realize it was THAT rural.

I hope Ashley and Nathan can reach a happy medium, but if Nathan is working in the tree business I don't know how far they could move away. Knoxville is 24 miles from the Bateses, so that would be a lot of gas used going back and forth to work.

[SongbirdHollow]

I read all your comments before watching the episode, and kind of poo-poo'ed the idea that she couldn't adjust, but after seeing it..... Even Knoxville is not gonna cut it for that girl. I think she's great, but I kept thinking, "Nathan, have you heard of Farmers Only?"

[Clemgo3165]

I read all your comments before watching the episode, and kind of poo-poo'ed the idea that she couldn't adjust, but after seeing it..... Even Knoxville is not gonna cut it for that girl. I think she's great, but I kept thinking, "Nathan, have you heard of Farmers Only?"

 

I think she'll give it a try and may find she likes with all of the family around. But I think she'd likely be happier in Nashville or Atlanta. Both are big enough to be interesting and lively, but both have close in semi-rural areas where a tree man could thrive.

 

 

Knoxville is 24 miles from the Bateses, so that would be a lot of gas used going back and forth to work.

 

Eh, I drive 42 miles round trip every day to work and only fill the tank once a week. Of course Nathan would probably have a truck, but maybe he could leave that at the homestead and drive something more economical to and from.

Edited April 14, 2016 by Clemgo3165

[Absolom]

How's this for a scary thought.  The could live in Knoxville and he could find a job there. 

[Patricia07]

You mean ask THE MAN to adjust??? 

[Sew Sumi]

Hey, CHAD did, but as we all know, he's the exception to every rule we have about fundies. 

[EtheltoTillie]

My dad was a tree man in NYC. True story.

[Jenilane6]

Looks like Nathan and Ashley are splits according to the preview for next week.

[3 is enough]

I was just going to ask about that.  I thought they were engaged?  Could be just creative editing to pull viewers in for next week.

[3 is enough]

There was a shot of Nathan talking about "problems" and "we will be friends".  It was very fast though.  

[cereality]

I though the same thing - he looked super serious and maybe even a but sad as he said they love each but "problems" and "we'll stay good friends and keep talking." It sounds like the beginning of the end, unless they go back to their lives without one or the other flying to NYC or Tenn every few months and realize they miss each other 24-7. Not super likely but stranger things have happened.

[Sew Sumi]

I think it's a red herring. They were still together back in April - after that was shot - at the Gothard conference in Big Sandy. She traveled with the family to at least Georgia. She's been quiet on SM other than posting pics with her sisters. If she's been to TN, it's being kept very quiet, and the same goes for a break up, which could have happened, but later than when this scene was filmed. 

If it was the Duggars, they'd say they'd "walked through fire" blah blah blah. At least, we get semi-regular speak from the Bateseseseses.