S18.E21: I Had My Cousin's Baby

[Maharincess]

I'm having my cousin's baby.

What the ever loving fuck did I just watch?!

Please tell me somebody else out there watched this! I must discuss this with somebody.

Edited December 31, 2015 by Maharincess

[IvyDancer]

Long time lurker but I had to finally create an account to comment in this thread - I honestly feel skeevy and horrendous after watching this show. It might be the trashiest thing I've ever seen on tv, and that's truly saying something. WOW. 

 

And as a current California resident, I truly wish they would have budgeted accurately and researched their destination. But that is clearly asking and expecting far too much. YEESH. 

[Cosmic Muffin]

I clicked because of the intriguing title; who is Havi, I wondered. Sounds like I missed a creepy episode.

[Drogo]

Sounds like a Game of Thrones episode. 

 

Thread title updated... but you'd have to pull some Clockwork Orange stuff to get me to watch this one. 

 

 

[FozzyBear]

What did I just watch? The fuck? And what is up with Grace? Her and Dylan have a serious serial killer vibe to them.

[Maharincess]

I've seen a lot of crazy shit on TV but this takes the cake.

I spent the entire hour wishing it was fake.

The 20 year old who was having her second baby with her cousin being confused by the fact that her cousin/fiancee's victims wanted him to stay in jail because "he just stole material things, but staying in jail means he'll miss his kids birth" was an idiot. How dare these victims want that thief to stay in jail, don't they know he got his cousin pregnant?! Have they no feelings?

Then the Beverly Hillbillies traveling to Los Angeles with a broken car, no jobs, no place to live and no money...holy shit. These people can't be real can they? I felt so bad for those kids. That nasty, filthy house they lived in wasn't fit for kids.

My brain hurts after watching this.

[Maharincess]

I clicked because of the intriguing title; who is Havi, I wondered. Sounds like I missed a creepy episode.

I messed up the title, I was trying to do it from my phone and it posted before I could finish the title then I couldn't edit.

Sorry for the confusion.

[lisalionheart]

That was bleak. Frankly, I think being born to cousins is the least of these babies' problems. Of course, I'm a bit biased because my paternal grandparents were first cousins, and the worst it seemed to do to my father was that he had one of his earlobes was attached and the other was detached. As I understand it, a first-cousin marriage, without a longer family history of incest, is unlikely to create major birth defects. I don't think it's a GOOD idea, just not a terrible one. (ETA: My grandparents didn't grow up together and didn't meet til they were in their late teens, fwiw.)

 

Grace and her cousin-husband budgeted $800-$1,000 for rent in LA. $800-$1,000. Unless, of course, it had a great view of the Hollywood sign--then they would pay a little more. And they thought $45 a night was too expensive for a hotel? At $45 a night in LA, the two of them should probably have taken shifts watching the door at night. Overall, I was torn on them. On the one hand, they seemed a bit harmless to me--I didn't really get a serial killer vibe, just a low-socioeconomic-status vibe. But their family's response to the situation seemed pretty extreme. I wondered whether there was more to the story than they were sharing.

 

The other one? Oy. Her dismissal of the victims' suffering was smug and selfish. And her mother looked so young.

Edited January 1, 2016 by lisalionheart

[Trampolina]

The Tennessee couple's half assed plan to move to LA was so sad. That budget was ridiculous with $200-400 a month for food and $800-$1000 for rent. Multiply that by 2 and you can live in a city.

It didn't surprise me at all that the other girl felt her loser/cousin boyfriend should get out on bond. I've been a parole officer for 10 years and I've never heard remorse for the victim. Facebook is full of 'free so and so' no matter how heinous the crime is. Good luck to her because that guy will be in and out of prison for the next 30 years.

[FozzyBear]

I predict Lexi has already moved on to her other cousin, her boyfriend's brother(my head hurts just typing that). When she said she needed to focus on her kids I took it as her needing to find a new man. No way she waits 6 years.

The other couple: what was the plan once they got to LA? All the "extra" expenses couldn't have added up to more than another couple of thousand, which would have kept them going maybe a few extra weeks in LA. Then what? Were they expecting to get discovered or something? And if they were so broke how did they get back to Tennessee?

[Maharincess]

I wonder what the plan was for the Tennessee couple after the first month. If they thought they had enough for a month in LA, what happens when the month is over? Neither one had any job prospects there, they had no friends or family there.

The birthday party thing was weird. You hear that you aren't invited so you have your kid scribble on paper, call it a card and go to the party anyway? Did they think that the piece of scribbled paper would get them inside? I was confused on that, I agree there was more to that story.

They seem like the types who show up at your door when they're broke and want money, that's probably why they weren't allowed in.

It's legal here in California to marry a first cousin but I just couldn't imagine doing it. You share the same grandparents! It's just so bizarre to me. There aren't any non blood relatives in your town for you to marry?

I had to let my dogs out and missed the very end, what did they say about the girl with the cousin/fiancée in prison?

[IvyDancer]

For the Tennessee couple - I kept trying to figure out what their end game was - perhaps maybe you could conceivably drive to LA on their budget (HA!!!!!) I was shocked they made it to be honest - but what were their plans for jobs once they got here? Also, I totally balked at their budget for a nightly hotel. I don't even think a place infested with bed bugs would rent for under $100/night in LA. 

 

And yes, Lexi and her father who said "what it is" as a greeting ended me. No remorse, no self-awareness, no forethought whatsoever. Just bizarre. Sad, disappointing and bizarre. 

 

And finally, for both couples, it seemed weird to me to envision a wedding where only one side (or three sides rather than the expected four) could be invited and show up. I mean, they only have one set of grandparents. 

Edited December 31, 2015 by IvyDancer

[meatball77]

This should could have just been called True Life I'm Poor.  It was just all so depressing.  The couple that traveled to LA, that was practically a guide to how families become homeless and how hard it is to leave small towns.  I suspect that MTV paid for their trip back after they ended up homeless. 

[CocoaGoddess]

I cannot believe what I just watched. I CANNOT. I've been watching True Life since it started, and I can honestly say that this is one of the saddest episodes ever. 

 

If you have to call a state ahead of time to find out the cost of bread, then it's probably not a great idea to uproot your entire family and spend your last $1000 on dreams of living it up in a beach house. My god. What did they even do for a living, did they say? And what hotel did they initially book that they couldn't get into when they finally made it to LA? Or should I say, which skid row hotel? Because he was scandalized at the idea of paying $45 per night for a room ... 

[Christina]

In most jurisdictions, to be held without bail requires that you are a substantial risk for running, such as wealthy and have the ability to move to another country, or more likely in this case, have committed a crime that has a punishment of life in prison. This was probably home invasions while someone was home and with a weapon. The six year sentence threw me, because even with a plea agreement, that seems low for a home invasion. So I looked him up. The Daily Mail had an article about the show, with photos of him with Alexis and a photo of the tattoo on her hip that said Andrew Allen. I then pulled up his mug shots and he had charges for 2nd degree burglary with violence and a 1st degree burglary along with receiving stolen goods.

 

Daily Mail Link: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3380625/Two-women-love-cousins-having-babies-speak-taboo-relationships.html

Mugshots: http://southcarolina.arrests.org/search.php?fname=Andrew&lname=Allen&fpartial=True

 

I also found an article on a grand larceny charge that was unrelated to the burglaries: http://www.independentmail.com/news/clemson-university-police-charge-two-in-equipment-theft-ep-348489218-346143732.html

 

Finally, I came across an update from MTV about Alexis. I was going to put what she said about their relationship behind a spoiler tag, but it doesn't seem to be working, so I'll just post the link. http://www.mtv.com/news/2719275/true-life-update-i-had-my-cousins-baby/

 

Finally, the Tennessee couple were just stupid. They packed up with no plans and thought California would be better for them? Were they thinking they would get a reality show or something? I'm sure their families had to help them when they returned with no jobs or home. If they didn't grow up with each other, the family backlash was probably over something unrelated to them being cousins. Both couples were eye rollingly dumb to watch.

[FozzyBear]

I wonder what the plan was for the Tennessee couple after the first month. If they thought they had enough for a month in LA, what happens when the month is over? Neither one had any job prospects there, they had no friends or family there.

The birthday party thing was weird. You hear that you aren't invited so you have your kid scribble on paper, call it a card and go to the party anyway? Did they think that the piece of scribbled paper would get them inside? I was confused on that, I agree there was more to that story.

They seem like the types who show up at your door when they're broke and want money, that's probably why they weren't allowed in.

It's legal here in California to marry a first cousin but I just couldn't imagine doing it. You share the same grandparents! It's just so bizarre to me. There aren't any non blood relatives in your town for you to marry?

I had to let my dogs out and missed the very end, what did they say about the girl with the cousin/fiancée in prison?

I got a similar vibe from the Tennessee couple. Just a wired grifting, con artist kind of thing. It made me wonder if the marriage was what they were blaming everything on, but really the bad blood ran much deeper.

[Empress1]

I cannot believe what I just watched. I CANNOT. I've been watching True Life since it started, and I can honestly say that this is one of the saddest episodes ever. 

 

If you have to call a state ahead of time to find out the cost of bread, then it's probably not a great idea to uproot your entire family and spend your last $1000 on dreams of living it up in a beach house. My god. What did they even do for a living, did they say? And what hotel did they initially book that they couldn't get into when they finally made it to LA? Or should I say, which skid row hotel? Because he was scandalized at the idea of paying $45 per night for a room ... 

 

I felt really weird watching this. There were all kinds of stereotypes here - of course all the participants were poor Southern folks, the kids in the TN family were rarely dressed, they lived in trailers, the levels of education seemed low, there was poverty, the black guy was in jail. (I'm guessing that engagement broke off pretty quick with the six-year sentence.) It felt really gross, to me. 

 

I can't figure out why the TN couple had to move to LA. There was zero chance they were going to make it there. None. When he said $800 - $1000 a month for rent unless they got a view of the Hollywood sign, I was like " ... Oh no." And they had no plan. I can understand wanting a fresh start, but why LA? Why not a bigger city in TN like Nashville, or another city in a closer Southern state? I'm guessing the wife was a SAHM; she has two kids under three. No idea about him. And how did they get home if they were broke?

 

I have True Life season-passed but I've deleted the past few episodes because they were boring. I was like, well, maybe I'm getting too old for it. And then here this was on my TiVo. I watched it straight through, but I kind of judge myself for it.

[ethalfrida]

Historically, first cousins have married in order to continue the bloodline and to keep the money in the family. I am not saying it is not one of the skeeviest things among humans, just that it is not new.

 

Europeans most notedly. But remember in Gone With The Wind, Ashley Wilkes and his first cousin Melanie was betrothed then married. He was the one Scarlett O'hara loved.

 

I have to agree. I wanted to turn away because it made me uncomfortable but continued to watch in disbelief because neighter of the these families had much going on. And even though it didn't seem to be a continued practice in their families there seemed to be some issues amongst them in dealing with reasoning... 

Edited January 1, 2016 by ethalfrida

[qtpye]

OH MY GOD.  I wish I had something intelligent to say, but it is nothing that has not been said before.  I too was about to delete this show from my dvr and then this episode happened.

 

There will be no good outcomes for those babies.  The TN cousins pick up and move across the country with two small children and no plans whatsoever.  I wonder if they thought looking pitiful would cause this show to provide them with housing or a new car?  I mean was anyone surprised that the bucket of bolts they were driving broke down, after hauling a U-haul for that many miles?

 

The trailer in TN was filthy and the girls were running around in their diapers for most of the time.  I grew up in the south and these people made me cringe with horror.

 

Alexis has two babies by two different men and she is not even in her mid twenties?  She was begging for money, but was covered in giant expensive tattoos.  I really hope she does not have another baby with her other cousin.  I wonder how sympathetic she would be if someone broke in her house and only stole "material things".

 

I also noticed that all the people were rather good looking (though you have to wash a layer of filth off the TN cousins).  I wonder if they thought being on t.v. would get them discovered or maybe provide a rich benefactor?

[yogi2014L]

Ugh this was so so weird on so many levels but I have to (yes I feel ashamed) that I watched the whole thing and it was one of the better 'True Life" episodes I have seen in a while

Lately I feel like MTV has been showing adults doing like cosplay or their hobbies. BORING.

 

The TN couple is completely naive and stupid and I fear for their Kids. The mom was very pretty, IMO. This is horrible but I could see her stripping or something down the line to pay the bills. 

 

I really dont know what couple is trashier. The mom (Lexi) 100% is going to be a couple with Tony  and probably will have his kid in the next year or two. Some people just cannot help themselves. 

[beesknees]

Good Lord.  Who moves to L.A. with only a few thousand dollars in their pocket?  And a family of four yet!  And no jobs lined up!  Sigh.

Yeah, that didn't have disaster written all over it.  Thank God everything was well thought out.  The tip-off for those morons should have been the horror/pearl-clutching they expressed at eggs costing $3.50 a dozen.  Hee.

 

$45 a night for a motel room was too much? *Crickets*  I was waiting for the dude to suggest they sleep in the U-Haul for the night to save money.  The other chick with the dude in jail.  Just depressing.  That shit-hole of a trailer made me want to cry.  Well, at least she had enough sense not to drag her two babies around the country with no money and no plan.  

 

I'm glad her significant other got six years in jail.  He'd be nothing but a drain on their relationship and a general menace to society.  

Edited January 5, 2016 by beesknees

[Spencer Hastings]

I turned to my sister while watching this and said "Keep your hypothetical daughter the hell away from my hypothetical son." THAT is how closely related these people are.

The one girl with the guy in jail said she'd known her boyfriends's brother for as long as she'd known her boyfriend because he's her cousin too? You've known them for a long time because you are family. You were born into this crap. Your parents are siblings. Your grandparents are the same people. I can't even. No way does she stay single. She had two different guys waiting.

The California couple had something off about them. If they hadn't already been cousins I most definitely would have made an incest joke. Her giggling, his overall demeanor...there was something odd there. And I won't even get into the fact that they thought they could drive a '96 Taurus to Califoria without incident. THAT was their first mistake. Add in $800-1000 for rent in Los Angeles and not even having a prayer lined up...yikes!!

I think I would have been fine sitting back and enjoying the train wreck if I hadn't been distracted with how much they looked alike. I spent half the show picking out similar features on their faces. So weird.

Edited January 5, 2016 by Spencer Hastings

[Spacecow]

It's 1 am and I really should go to bed but I'm absolutely enthralled by this trainwreck. The Tennessee couple couldn't be more of a stereotype if they tried. That trailer looked like it smelled so bad. I agree with earlier posters that they seem like con artists/grifters/generally sketchy people. 

Edited January 5, 2016 by Spacecow

[heatherchandler]

It's 1 am and I really should go to bed but I'm absolutely enthralled by this trainwreck. The Tennessee couple couldn't be more of a stereotype if they tried. That trailer looked like it smelled so bad. I agree with earlier posters that they seem like con artists/grifters/generally sketchy people. 

 

Help me God I also stayed up late to watch this.  It was mesmerizing.

 

I think it should have been called: True Life: I am an Idiot.  That was basically the premise.

 

I could not STAND the TN dude's beard.  So disgusting.

[qtpye]

If you guys ever look up the 90's remake of the Beverly Hillbillies (the one with Jim Varney as Jed Clampett), the male TN cousin sounds almost exactly like Jethro Bodine played by Diedrich Bader.  Actually Jethro, for being as dumb as he was, never hit on Ellie Mae.

 

One of the most disturbing things I have ever seen on television.  As the poster up thread said, being cousins was actually the least of these people's worries.

Edited January 5, 2016 by qtpye

[puppytoes]

I feel so dirty after watching this mess. MTV has really gone downhill. True Life used to be fun to watch. This was downright revolting. They really went to the bottom of the barrel to find these people.

[luvly]

The TN couple, or the wife at least, definitely moved to LA to get discovered. There was a part right before they were leaving where she's talking to the camera and saying she's hoping people in LA accept that "we're in love, we have two babies and we're cousins". Something about the way she phrased it and the glazed look in her eyes coupled with the giant smile on her face just screamed "reality show pitch".

Edited January 6, 2016 by luvly

[aulait]

I can't figure out why the TN couple had to move to LA. There was zero chance they were going to make it there. None. When he said $800 - $1000 a month for rent unless they got a view of the Hollywood sign, I was like " ... Oh no." And they had no plan. I can understand wanting a fresh start, but why LA? Why not a bigger city in TN like Nashville, or another city in a closer Southern state? I'm guessing the wife was a SAHM; she has two kids under three. No idea about him. And how did they get home if they were broke?

 

Um yeah. That was exactly what I thought. Certainly there were many large cities that were closer/cheaper/no one knew them. MANY. IMO they (actually I got the distinct impression it was SHE who pushed it forward, not him) wanted LA was to start a career in something or it was some long held dream to live where the beautiful people are and everything is golden and so they decided to wing it. So sad with two little kids, driving that huge gas guzzler with a POS car on the back all over the dangerous parts of LA looking for a good hotel under $45. If calling a dollar store was the amount of research they did, good lordy. 

 

 

I wonder what the plan was for the Tennessee couple after the first month. If they thought they had enough for a month in LA, what happens when the month is over? Neither one had any job prospects there, they had no friends or family there.

The birthday party thing was weird. You hear that you aren't invited so you have your kid scribble on paper, call it a card and go to the party anyway? Did they think that the piece of scribbled paper would get them inside? I was confused on that, I agree there was more to that story.

They seem like the types who show up at your door when they're broke and want money, that's probably why they weren't allowed in.

 

Drama. They did it straight up for drama! People who like drama and are used to dysfunction do stuff like that. I would not be surprised if they are big time grifters as well, but the party was 100% drama seeking. When she said she was nervous as they were driving there I wanted to say, "YES! Its because you are seeking out drama! Listen to that feeling!". Instead her dirty husband (though I could see he would be handsome if he lost the ridiculous beard) says, "That's normal". No help for these two. 

[AngryCarrot86]

I feel like I've seen that TN couple somewhere before...."Faces of Meth" perhaps?  But really...there's no way those two weren't on drugs.  The wife especially. 

[Christina]

While reading something on one of the Teen Moms, I think, I came across this article on this show. http://theashleysrealityroundup.com/2016/01/06/the-couples-of-true-life-i-had-my-cousins-baby-where-are-they-now/

 

This website has been correct in the past about the teen moms, but I'm guessing they have an insider for those shows. According to this article, the TN husband had a job in LA which fell through after they arrived, It also has several comments from the family on Facebook about the couple, including that they are 3rd cousins, didn't know each other, and haven't been shunned. Even more interesting:

 

 

 

Grace’s mother and stepfather both wrote that Grace and Dylan were so nervous as to how they would be portrayed on the episode that they allegedly went through procedures to get MTV to not air the episode. Grace’s mother wrote that by doing so, the couple forfeited the money they were to receive from MTV for doing the show.  “They had even signed papers with ‘True Life’ before they came home to not air the show because of the way the show was gonna turn out,” Grace’s mom wrote. “So they did not receive a penny for it…. They had signed papers to cancel it. And [MTV] went ahead and aired it.” Grace’s stepdad claimed on Facebook that the couple was supposed to get about $2,000 for doing the episode.

[Indy]

I finally watched this mess....I miss old True Life when my brain didn't die a little after watching episodes....

 

Both situations were super screwy, particularly the unwashed duo trying to move to LA. I think that the least of the problems those poor kids are going to have is that their parents are cousins (my college roommate's grandparents - both sets of them - were first cousins and she's brilliant and looks like Barbie so apparently inbreeding isn't always a bad thing...but nobody was in jail or moving cross-country without money so that probably helped things).  

[pakalolo]

According to this article, the TN husband had a job in LA which fell through after they arrived, It also has several comments from the family on Facebook about the couple, including that they are 3rd cousins, didn't know each other, and haven't been shunned.

If they say they weren't shunned does that mean they made their children create cards and took them to someone's empty house and pretended to be ignored by a birthday party full of relatives? I mean, it was a weird scene anyway, but they just made it up for MTV and none of the camera people or producers noticed it was a completely empty house?

[heatherchandler]

It also has several comments from the family on Facebook about the couple, including that they are 3rd cousins, didn't know each other, and haven't been shunned.

What kind of crazy person must you be to pretend to be fucking your COUSIN in order to get a tv deal?? Edited February 3, 2016 by heatherchandler

[ShaNaeNae]

When Tennessee mom was crying into the camera, you can see a small roach running up the cabinet behind her.  A small one, you know the ones where it could mean your house is infested.

[StatisticalOutlier]

The 20 year old who was having her second baby with her cousin being confused by the fact that her cousin/fiancee's victims wanted him to stay in jail because "he just stole material things, but staying in jail means he'll miss his kids birth" was an idiot.

 

Please try not to misquote people.  She said he stole "materialistic things." 

 

And speaking of misquoting, I meant to remember exactly what she said about being disappointed in him, because she expected better from family, or something like that.  Man, what a burden:  fiance, baby daddy AND relative.

 

But it also kills me because it's so often these people's families that cause problems in the first place.  And cousins, in particular.  Start paying attention to news reports, and you'll notice it.  Retribution shootings are almost always for cousins.  A liquor store got knocked over?  I guarantee it's somebody and his cousin.  Young kids playing with matches?  There will be a cousin there.

 

 

That was bleak. Frankly, I think being born to cousins is the least of these babies' problems. Of course, I'm a bit biased because my paternal grandparents were first cousins, and the worst it seemed to do to my father was that he had one of his earlobes was attached and the other was detached. As I understand it, a first-cousin marriage, without a longer family history of incest, is unlikely to create major birth defects.

 

Well, that guy with the beard--maybe he just doesn't present well on television, but it makes me wonder about the "longer family history of incest" thing.  So very many poor choices springing from that brain.

 

That beard alone should be considered a criminal offense  It's ugly and gross, and it just doesn't look good on him.  He's way too vertical to have a vertical beard, too.  And he had a very weird gait.  Maybe it's just a physical deformity unrelated to anything else, but the entire package screams something-going-on-upstream.  Fortunately, it turns out they're third cousins, and maybe the kids will favor the wife's side.  She's pretty, and if her daughters adopt that scary smile/laugh whenever relating something bad thing, it can probably be eliminated with therapy; they're going to need it anyway.

 

 

Alexis has two babies by two different men and she is not even in her mid twenties?  She was begging for money, but was covered in giant expensive tattoos.  I really hope she does not have another baby with her other cousin.  I wonder how sympathetic she would be if someone broke in her house and only stole "material things".

 

Again, it's materialistic things.  Fortunately, her most prized possessions are indelibly inked on her body, and from the looks of where she was living, people would be more likely to want to break OUT of her house.  That big hole in the wall covered with saran wrap?  Yikes.  It's nice she has money to spend on tats and a snood, but fuddy duddy that I am, I think it should go toward making a decent home for her children. 

 

But most interesting to me was that her affect reminded me so much of Jenelle on Teen Mom 2.  Is it a South Carolina thing?  The way they talk, and the way their faces look when talking (kind of dead), and the way they both say "my child" all the time.  Creepy.

Edited February 9, 2016 by StatisticalOutlier