Small Talk: The Polygamous Cul-de-Sac

suomi · August 1, 2020

1 hour ago, Yeah No said:

Thanks for your good wishes - they mean more than you know!

You are welcome. Jeez I stuck my foot in my mouth when I asked if this is your worst year. 2001 should have entitled you to a free pass from then on. All of that was horrible. I hope you hear good news when you call the hospital tomorrow. Chin up! Or bottoms up, if you enjoy adult beverages.

My blood boiled at Lowe's two nights ago. I got there about 40 minutes before closing for a curbside pickup. I prepped by writing down my order number because they can get snippy if they have to look-up using name or phone number. She said last 4 digits of your payment method? Never been asked that before. I said I paid with my Lowe's card and don't have it with me because I don't carry it unless I'm using it. I heard her roll her eyes before she said then I'm going to have to see your driver's license! Never heard that one before but I said no problem, it's in my wallet.

After 15 minutes she stomped out with my 9 bags of gravel in a shopping cart instead of on a flatbed cart, which is how I transport heavy stuff when I buy it inside. She came to my closed window, I flashed my license, she studied it intently and said where do you want this? My car is an obnoxious little Juke and she could clearly see that a large plastic tub was taking up the back seat so the only choices were the hatchback area or my lap or my sister's lap. I said please put it in the hatchback, she had trouble hearing me so I said it louder. She stomped to the back of the car and... did nothing. She stood in my blind spot but I could see the cart. I thought OK, she's waiting for some muscle, waiting for a male employee to come outside and heft the bags that weigh 50 pounds out of the cart. Back Street Boys came on the radio, Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely, I sang along, a nice way to spend my time. Another song came on and played all the way through, while I eyeballed every male who walked out of the store, thinking he's the one, no he's the one.

Two separate couples walked past my car giving me the hairy eyeball. First one I blew off, the second one I was like WTF, why are they looking at me like that? It was now 15 minutes until closing. She came to my window and gave me the universal WTF sign, wrists bent, palms facing the sky and mumbled something. I loud-talked what? and she said are you going to open your car? I loud-talked the hatchback is unlocked, she said this is not my vehicle, I cannot touch it. I said no one has ever said that before, everyone opens the hatchback and loads, no questions asked, why did you wait back there so long before mentioning this? She rolled her eyes. I said no problem, take the order inside and cancel it. She stomped to the back again, loaded the bags and gotta give her credit very softly closed the hatchback.

Ten minutes until closing. I was ticked. I drove to the parking lot next door and called Lowe's. I recognized the voice when "she" answered (!) and I said hello I need a store manager, please. (I wanted to say this is Karen and I need a manager but I refrained). She gulped and hesitated before saying OK. The nice manager Marilyn picked up almost immediately, I gave her my name and said I just had a very unpleasant experience with an employee from the pickup desk. I didn't know her name but Marilyn recognized her from my description. I knew she was looking up my account because she asked me to spell my first name. I ran it all down to her and she kept saying oh no, oh no. She said all of it was bullshit (my term, not hers), the last 4 digits of my payment method, the driver's license, can't touch the car, waiting so long to even tell me that, the eye rolling. She said you shop here a LOT and I said yep, I have reno-ed and improved and bought appliances at Lowe's for many years. She said please, please come to me next week and let me make this right for you in some way and gave me her schedule. I said thank you, I doubt that I will be doing that but please talk to your employee and she said "Absolutely."

As for the hairy eyeballs... I think she was making faces or flipping me off or something, because why else would two different couples shoot me dirty looks while this was going on? I should have asked Marilyn if they have cameras in the parking lot. The kicker is, August 3 is a full moon and the week before a full moon is when people who are prone to wigging out do so. I thought about that tonight when I read Meowwww's post about her customer encounter today. When I was a CNA I learned that, without fail, patients with very demanding personalities or dementia or Alzheimer's seriously act out the week before the full moon.

I have a store credit balance that needs to be used and I recently found out that Lowe's has really good prices on paper towels and TP, and plenty in stock, but you have to buy it inside. So... after the weekend I'm gonna mask up and stroll past the pickup desk because the paper goods aisle is right there. I'm old, I don't take kindly to being pushed around anymore and sometimes you eat the bear and sometimes the bear eats you.

Irate Panda · August 1, 2020

3 hours ago, suomi said:

You are welcome. Jeez I stuck my foot in my mouth when I asked if this is your worst year. 2001 should have entitled you to a free pass from then on. All of that was horrible. I hope you hear good news when you call the hospital tomorrow. Chin up! Or bottoms up, if you enjoy adult beverages.

My blood boiled at Lowe's two nights ago. I got there about 40 minutes before closing for a curbside pickup. I prepped by writing down my order number because they can get snippy if they have to look-up using name or phone number. She said last 4 digits of your payment method? Never been asked that before. I said I paid with my Lowe's card and don't have it with me because I don't carry it unless I'm using it. I heard her roll her eyes before she said then I'm going to have to see your driver's license! Never heard that one before but I said no problem, it's in my wallet.

After 15 minutes she stomped out with my 9 bags of gravel in a shopping cart instead of on a flatbed cart, which is how I transport heavy stuff when I buy it inside. She came to my closed window, I flashed my license, she studied it intently and said where do you want this? My car is an obnoxious little Juke and she could clearly see that a large plastic tub was taking up the back seat so the only choices were the hatchback area or my lap or my sister's lap. I said please put it in the hatchback, she had trouble hearing me so I said it louder. She stomped to the back of the car and... did nothing. She stood in my blind spot but I could see the cart. I thought OK, she's waiting for some muscle, waiting for a male employee to come outside and heft the bags that weigh 50 pounds out of the cart. Back Street Boys came on the radio, Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely, I sang along, a nice way to spend my time. Another song came on and played all the way through, while I eyeballed every male who walked out of the store, thinking he's the one, no he's the one.

Two separate couples walked past my car giving me the hairy eyeball. First one I blew off, the second one I was like WTF, why are they looking at me like that? It was now 15 minutes until closing. She came to my window and gave me the universal WTF sign, wrists bent, palms facing the sky and mumbled something. I loud-talked what? and she said are you going to open your car? I loud-talked the hatchback is unlocked, she said this is not my vehicle, I cannot touch it. I said no one has ever said that before, everyone opens the hatchback and loads, no questions asked, why did you wait back there so long before mentioning this? She rolled her eyes. I said no problem, take the order inside and cancel it. She stomped to the back again, loaded the bags and gotta give her credit very softly closed the hatchback.

Ten minutes until closing. I was ticked. I drove to the parking lot next door and called Lowe's. I recognized the voice when "she" answered (!) and I said hello I need a store manager, please. (I wanted to say this is Karen and I need a manager but I refrained). She gulped and hesitated before saying OK. The nice manager Marilyn picked up almost immediately, I gave her my name and said I just had a very unpleasant experience with an employee from the pickup desk. I didn't know her name but Marilyn recognized her from my description. I knew she was looking up my account because she asked me to spell my first name. I ran it all down to her and she kept saying oh no, oh no. She said all of it was bullshit (my term, not hers), the last 4 digits of my payment method, the driver's license, can't touch the car, waiting so long to even tell me that, the eye rolling. She said you shop here a LOT and I said yep, I have reno-ed and improved and bought appliances at Lowe's for many years. She said please, please come to me next week and let me make this right for you in some way and gave me her schedule. I said thank you, I doubt that I will be doing that but please talk to your employee and she said "Absolutely."

As for the hairy eyeballs... I think she was making faces or flipping me off or something, because why else would two different couples shoot me dirty looks while this was going on? I should have asked Marilyn if they have cameras in the parking lot. The kicker is, August 3 is a full moon and the week before a full moon is when people who are prone to wigging out do so. I thought about that tonight when I read Meowwww's post about her customer encounter today. When I was a CNA I learned that, without fail, patients with very demanding personalities or dementia or Alzheimer's seriously act out the week before the full moon.

I have a store credit balance that needs to be used and I recently found out that Lowe's has really good prices on paper towels and TP, and plenty in stock, but you have to buy it inside. So... after the weekend I'm gonna mask up and stroll past the pickup desk because the paper goods aisle is right there. I'm old, I don't take kindly to being pushed around anymore and sometimes you eat the bear and sometimes the bear eats you.

I don’t know why she waited so long back there, I could see maybe 5 mins, but 15???....maybe frustration of working curbside, it sounds like there was a lot wrong with the transaction. The store I visit doesn’t have the employees open the trunk either, so they cut down on vehicle to vehicle contact (and liability issues), but some employees do it anyway because it takes less time for them. They do always ask for order confirmation number and ID there too. Unfortunately, I know this because my husband insists on stopping to pick up an order for his “projects” every time I’m with him. Never heard of the last four digits thing.. I do know every time we go there, there seems to be a different variation of the protocol, but write it off to different people. I’m not sure why the lady was so frustrated, but I have to give a shout out to our Lowe’s, curbside can be tiring and backbreaking from the looks of it, and the employees have all been nice and courteous. Same for all the stores I’ve been to, which aren’t many. Luckily, I can pretty much stay home during this hot mess of a pandemic, but I am thankful to have had such great service, especially at our grocery store. These workers are so darn cheerful, I hope they’re getting paid extra for coming to work through all this and smiling so much LOL.

Pickleinthemiddle · August 1, 2020

3 hours ago, Irate Panda said:

I don’t know why she waited so long back there, I could see maybe 5 mins, but 15???....maybe frustration of working curbside, it sounds like there was a lot wrong with the transaction. The store I visit doesn’t have the employees open the trunk either, so they cut down on vehicle to vehicle contact (and liability issues), but some employees do it anyway because it takes less time for them. They do always ask for order confirmation number and ID there too. Unfortunately, I know this because my husband insists on stopping to pick up an order for his “projects” every time I’m with him. Never heard of the last four digits thing.. I do know every time we go there, there seems to be a different variation of the protocol, but write it off to different people. I’m not sure why the lady was so frustrated, but I have to give a shout out to our Lowe’s, curbside can be tiring and backbreaking from the looks of it, and the employees have all been nice and courteous. Same for all the stores I’ve been to, which aren’t many. Luckily, I can pretty much stay home during this hot mess of a pandemic, but I am thankful to have had such great service, especially at our grocery store. These workers are so darn cheerful, I hope they’re getting paid extra for coming to work through all this and smiling so much LOL.

A few of our local stores let you know to pop open your trunk or the back of you vehicle when you pull up so the employee doesn't have to touch your vehicle. then you close it yourself.

Yeah No · August 1, 2020

7 hours ago, suomi said:

You are welcome. Jeez I stuck my foot in my mouth when I asked if this is your worst year. 2001 should have entitled you to a free pass from then on. All of that was horrible. I hope you hear good news when you call the hospital tomorrow. Chin up! Or bottoms up, if you enjoy adult beverages.

No worries, in spite of all that my life continues to find ways to top itself in the crappy department. Now we are all experiencing the effects of the pandemic on top of the usual stuff. I did hear from my friend - she is feeling MUCH better after having the mass removed. They still think it's just an infection (not the "C" word) but they are doing the biopsy, which she says they should have the results of today if you can believe that. I am just SO relieved, I can't even tell you! I didn't sleep very well last night - I think I'm going to take a nap later.

7 hours ago, suomi said:

My blood boiled at Lowe's two nights ago. I got there about 40 minutes before closing for a curbside pickup. I prepped by writing down my order number because they can get snippy if they have to look-up using name or phone number. She said last 4 digits of your payment method? Never been asked that before. I said I paid with my Lowe's card and don't have it with me because I don't carry it unless I'm using it. I heard her roll her eyes before she said then I'm going to have to see your driver's license! Never heard that one before but I said no problem, it's in my wallet.

After 15 minutes she stomped out with my 9 bags of gravel in a shopping cart instead of on a flatbed cart, which is how I transport heavy stuff when I buy it inside. She came to my closed window, I flashed my license, she studied it intently and said where do you want this? My car is an obnoxious little Juke and she could clearly see that a large plastic tub was taking up the back seat so the only choices were the hatchback area or my lap or my sister's lap. I said please put it in the hatchback, she had trouble hearing me so I said it louder. She stomped to the back of the car and... did nothing. She stood in my blind spot but I could see the cart. I thought OK, she's waiting for some muscle, waiting for a male employee to come outside and heft the bags that weigh 50 pounds out of the cart. Back Street Boys came on the radio, Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely, I sang along, a nice way to spend my time. Another song came on and played all the way through, while I eyeballed every male who walked out of the store, thinking he's the one, no he's the one.

Two separate couples walked past my car giving me the hairy eyeball. First one I blew off, the second one I was like WTF, why are they looking at me like that? It was now 15 minutes until closing. She came to my window and gave me the universal WTF sign, wrists bent, palms facing the sky and mumbled something. I loud-talked what? and she said are you going to open your car? I loud-talked the hatchback is unlocked, she said this is not my vehicle, I cannot touch it. I said no one has ever said that before, everyone opens the hatchback and loads, no questions asked, why did you wait back there so long before mentioning this? She rolled her eyes. I said no problem, take the order inside and cancel it. She stomped to the back again, loaded the bags and gotta give her credit very softly closed the hatchback.

My mind boggles at this kind of thing. I seriously think we have a crisis of common sense in our society these days. At least she could have come forward to ask you to open the hatch for her. Maybe she assumed you had an internally operated lift-gate, which I am pretty sure the Juke does not (I have a Rogue, which does, but I know that the smaller Rogue Sport does NOT, it's not even available as an option). So what were you supposed to do, get out of the vehicle and open it for her? If that was her expectation, it was on her to ask you to do that, but then to cop such a surly attitude on top of that is amazing, but not surprising, sadly. If they have some sort of rule or procedure, it's on them to tell you what it is, not to expect you to know. And they probably don't, so her expectation was even more presumptuous. The ignorance of people these days is depressing.

Interestingly, I just placed a pick-up order with Lowe's last night. I have to replace my rolling kitchen island/sideboard because the old one was a piece of junk and after 10 years is literally falling apart (I should have known better to buy it at Big Lots, but there you go). I was going to buy it on Amazon but only 2 days after adding a couple of this brand and color to my wishlist, it was suddenly sold out with no warning. Usually on Amazon the site tells you there are only a few left and to order soon. Not this time! I couldn't believe it - even the Home Depot was suddenly out of stock. I noticed that even most of the other colors were out of stock as well - I wanted white. The only site I could find it on was Lowe's and even there it warned that it was almost out of stock. Fortunately Lowe's price was the same low price I found on Amazon, so I was lucky. I elected to pick it up at the store because this week we're going to see some bad weather as a storm moves up the coast, plus I don't know what day I'm going to NYC yet. I just didn't want a huge box being delivered in a nasty rain storm or have to sit outside all day if we're not home. I figure this way we can pick it up on a day that works for us. Even though they said it would be there by Aug. 5, the site warns that there could be delays due to the pandemic.

So anyway, thanks for the warning about Lowe's pickup - I deliberately chose a nicer Lowe's a little further away because the one in the town closest to us is one I'd like to avoid just because of past experience with employees that either are not with it, or the store being disorganized about stuff like this - I once ordered something for pick up at the closer Lowe's and they spent an hour trying to find it! The Home Depot in that town is no better. So I hope I chose a better Lowe's, LOL. I'll let you know how it turns out.

deirdra · August 1, 2020

7 hours ago, Pickleinthemiddle said:

A few of our local stores let you know to pop open your trunk or the back of you vehicle when you pull up so the employee doesn't have to touch your vehicle. then you close it yourself.

They do that around here too, and because I can unlock but not open my hatch from inside, I have to walk around and lift the hatch, stand back or get back in the car while they load it and close the hatch once they've left. But there was no reason for her to wait more than 15 seconds when she saw that you weren't opening it. Most ask for the license plate so they don't put your stuff in the wrong car.

dreadfulLeigh · August 2, 2020

On 7/28/2020 at 3:15 PM, suomi said:

I blame a lot on the dumbing down of education by school systems and parents not insisting that their kids read. When we went to church or some place where grooming mattered my mom got me ready first and plopped me down with an encyclopedia volume while she got the littles ready. Then we all sat and turned pages while she got ready.

Over the last hundred years a high school education has steadily lost its exchange rate for way too many kids.

My grandmother was born in 1910 and in her day city high schools offered Greek, Latin, German, Italian and French and math and science (and music) at levels equivalent to a classic education.

My mom was born in 1928 and Greek and Latin were long gone but city high schools offered German, Italian, French and Spanish. Four years of math, science and social studies were required and music (which included music appreciation) was greatly favored.

I was born in 1950 and in my podunk town French and Spanish were the language electives. Only those who played in the band were exposed to music. Core requirements were 4 years of English and math, 2 years of social studies and one year of science and civics. Electives were in vogue but you could choose to take 4 years of any core.

My daughter was born in 1971 and I was floored that she was presented with a menu heavy on electives and what amounted to remedial cores. You could choose 4 years of cores but WTF that 2-3 years of those earned a diploma.

My 1968 diploma is the equivalent of the first 2 years of college. When I watched Jeopardy with my daughter and the grands we had to raise our hand before answering and they would say "Again, with her hand in the air" and it didn't compute when I said "I read a lot and I went to high school." They had attended high school and read a fair amount and they weren't raising their hands. Whassup?

My impressions may not be typical but they illustrate a trend. Although I should confess that at a recent reunion a classmate said "I remember you reading the encyclopedia for fun." The US should not rank as low as it does. FFS we have the internet now! Pffftt.

I can understand the sentiment! Unless you’re especially curious and seek out extra bits of knowledge or intellectual pursuits, there’s not much that the basic educational foundation presented to children can provide anymore.

I took French in HS, extra science classes, band, chorus, theatre, AP literature. German and Dutch in university and so many extra courses I should have about 5 minors 😂 And I used to read the encyclopedia for fun as a child, in the pre-internet days.

I was born in the 80s and definitely saw a shift in education throughout my school experience as Standardized testing became more and more dominant. Soon, not only were we spending more time testing, we were beginning to spend more time practicing to test. That alone is enough to drive out intellectual curiosity in the average child.

it’s why I’m still considering homeschooling my children. In a few hours a day at home, I can give my children so much that increased classroom management, waiting for large classes of students and emphasis on standardized testing can’t. I want them to be curious,not have it ground out of them. I want them to enjoyed being challenged, not just do the bare minimum. I want them to seek out everything they are fascinated by, not just parrot rout memorization. Granted that is a huge privilege to be able to even consider that option. And I’m not saying our area schools are terrible bastardizations of education. But something has been lost in the intervening years and education is sadly lacking intellect and scientific thought and curiosity. The pursuit of knowledge purely for knowledge. Not to monetize it nor to lord it above others.

dreadfulLeigh · August 2, 2020

I’m so proud. As a youngish COL, I grew early on into my burgeoning get-off-my-lawn COL status, proudly donning the mantel. Today, my not yet 5 yo too as grasped that mantel’s edge.

Our neighbor has been ruining—I mean, renovating 🙄 his ca 1895 house for the past few months. He’s getting close to total destruction...erm, completion and has ramped up the length of his working days. Of late, sawing in his backyard, just beside ours, has been his main preoccupation.

My daughter walked out to the back door this afternoon to the obnoxious whine of a table saw and said loudly with the clarity of a innocent child, “Ugh! It’s sooo LOUD!” And cast a hard eye towards our neighbor. She is my child through and through.

suomi · August 2, 2020

I had to leave out some details when that Lowe's post turned into War and Peace. I tried to pick up that order twice before. I was there on the 24th when I was also picking up my birthday meal from Olive Garden. The only question after I gave my order number was which slot I was parked in. Waited 30 minutes and then called and said I'm leaving because I need to pick up some food in 5 minutes and he was cool with it. Went back two days later, gave order number and slot number, no questions asked. Waited 25 minutes and then my sister needed a bathroom and couldn't wait so I said I need to leave, he said no problem. Next time was the 29th, the night I posted about.

When I pulled in for one of those attempted pickups an employee was in the process of closing both of a vehicle's back doors, Maybe he loaded something long and had to adjust it by going to both sides of the car. I started picking up a few times a month after curbside began and never had a problem. I've spent about $25,000 at Lowe's here and in Saint George since 2014. Upgraded a bathroom and kitchen, and appliances and light fixtures, sold that place and upgraded the next place. Paint, flooring, countertops, vanities, toilets, tile, light fixtures, ceiling fans, shutters, appliances, patio furniture, gazebo, siding and insulation. Ate half of the labor but got the materials cost back both times I sold. Moved here, kinda bored because it's new and doesn't need much. Shutters, carpet and rain gutters but not from Lowe's, bought the washer/dryer there. Waiting on city to approve carport plan, storage shed will be here next month. It could be said that home improvement is my hobby. My mom was the same way but she always wanted to move when she was done so she could repeat the process. I hang in there for awhile. Would've stayed in SG but it got too hard to breathe in the summer. (Emphysema).

During my conversation with the manager, who I've somewhat come to know, she said pickup employees are trained to look at payment method first and if they see Lowe's Card the only thing they are supposed to say is which slot are you parked in. (I pick up groceries at WalMart every week and they also ask just one question). They want Lowe's Card customers in and out ASAP. She said some of the employees chafe at that so it's OK to verify using small talk. Are you picking up both orders today or I want to make sure your order is complete, how many items did you order? If your answers match what they see on their screen your identity is verified according to manager guidelines. I told her LOL I always use my LC and sometimes I've been asked those questions. I say I only have one order or there are two orders and you sent a pickup email for one of them. Or, I ordered 6 planters, a push broom and a 50' garden hose. Bingo, she said. She also told me there are no restrictions on opening and closing hatchbacks or doors but employees can't do tailgates.

deirdra · August 2, 2020

10 hours ago, suomi said:

but employees can't do tailgates.

How odd. So if someone orders huge bags of crushed rock, the employee would lift them over the tailgate of a pickup truck rather than open it? You'd think they'd leave it up to the customer - if you don't want employees touching your doors, hatches or tailgates, open them in advance; leaving them closed implies that you are OK with the employee touching them. For some people it is not Covid they are worried about, but someone slamming a door or not using the electronic closer button.

Sandy W · August 2, 2020

1 hour ago, deirdra said:

How odd. So if someone orders huge bags of crushed rock, the employee would lift them over the tailgate of a pickup truck rather than open it? You'd think they'd leave it up to the customer - if you don't want employees touching your doors, hatches or tailgates, open them in advance; leaving them closed implies that you are OK with the employee touching them. For some people it is not Covid they are worried about, but someone slamming a door or not using the electronic closer button.

The policy may be for the benefit of the employee, to minimize surface contacts that they encounter. Handles of the in-store pushcarts and shopping buggys can be sanitized but there is no way they could wipe down the customer's doors or closer buttons before opening or closing doors. They could wear plastic or rubber gloves but then you would have customers questioning if they disposed of and used fresh gloves for each customer.

Edited August 2, 2020 by Sandy W

suomi · August 2, 2020

I think it's a safety issue because tailgates are heavy and "come at you" when they open. I haven't had a p/u since the '90s and the gate was never my favorite feature. Are they hydraulic on newer vehicles?

Dogs in trucks is a thing here. I saw a family leash their dog through the back slider and the wife held the leash while hubby opened and closed the tailgate. The employee and the hubby did a cute do-si-do getting out of each other's way. LOL. People-watching is entertaining.

suomi · August 2, 2020

1 hour ago, deirdra said:

How odd. So if someone orders huge bags of crushed rock, the employee would lift them over the tailgate of a pickup truck rather than open it?

We didn't get into specifics but I'm pretty sure she meant the customer opens and closes the gate as needed.

Kohola3 · August 2, 2020

On 8/1/2020 at 7:32 AM, Irate Panda said:

I don’t know why she waited so long back there, I could see maybe 5 mins, but 15???....maybe frustration of working curbside, it sounds like there was a lot wrong with the transaction.

I'm going to postulate that it was more of a stalling tactic. If the store was closing in less than an hour, hanging around outside faking "customer not cooperating" kept her from having to do more than one or two more curbside deliveries.

suomi · August 2, 2020

39 minutes ago, Kohola3 said:

I'm going to postulate that it was more of a stalling tactic. If the store was closing in less than an hour, hanging around outside faking "customer not cooperating" kept her from having to do more than one or two more curbside deliveries.

Thank you, that was my entire point. I got there at 8:20, she walked out of the store at 8:35, they close at 9. Because I was getting that feeling it really really irritated me when she came off with the WTF gesture at ME when the ball had been in her court the entire time. I was a passive bystander, she was the one expected to perform.

She who answers the phone controls the flow. If you can't supply the last 4 digits she asks for and don't have your license with you, so sorry, she can't help you, come back tomorrow.

It made me re-visit the two times I left empty-handed after waiting 25 and 30 minutes.

Does management not survey pickup order check-in time and fulfillment time? I'm glad that everyone else there is so nice.

suomi · August 2, 2020

Are we tracking the Dragon astronauts, who are just a few minutes from splashdown? They're in the loss of signal phase right now and their speed has slowed to 16 mph!

Makes me nostalgic, in the olden days we said that my mom launched astronauts and my grandmother landed them.

ETA: Splashdown! Woot.

Edited August 2, 2020 by suomi

Sandy W · August 2, 2020

Sounds like massive mis-communication on the part of the store. There should be clearly stated protocols for accepting curbside delivery of your purchases posted on the website they maintain for online ordering plus signs and hand-out flyers for those who enter the store to purchase, then visit the pick-up area.

There may be valid reasons for employees to not engage in opening or closing your car/truck doors, possibly insurance liabilities or union edicts intended to safeguard the employees. In Suomi's instance, it sounds like the employee was just being a bitch or has been speculated, killing time, also killing important goodwill to the facility. It wouldn't have hurt her to step forward to your driver door and explain the reason she wasn't acting to open your door and if the store hasn't posted a procedure, the blame lies with them.

Irate Panda · August 2, 2020

The woman/girl (not sure of her age) should have told you to open your car, actually whoever you talked to on the phone first should have told you that. I have no idea if each Lowe’s store is different, ours tells us to have the vehicle open and have the ID out. I’m not sure if this is how the salesperson always acts or if she was tired and grumpy after a long day of curbside. I think a lot of these stores are understaff, I’m still trying to figure out why the woman is lugging heavy bags in a cart and not a flat bed or maybe it’s easier for her to lift them from the car because it’s not as low.

I’ll be the first to admit, you couldn’t pay me enough to work at a store in a pandemic, but if the customer is acting normal, which I assume @Suomi was, the worker should have stated what she needed earlier. Do they do curbside up until they close or do they stop sometime before that? If it’s up to the last minute I don’t know why the girl is wasting time, what’s the point she already lugged them out there, and she can slowly put them in the vehicle (I.e still wasting time, but not pissing the customer completely off) I don’t know her obviously but it seems like she was having a bad day and took it out on you.

BTW what was she bringing out again? If it were heavy, she could have been mad about that and took it out on you, but I’m assuming it was light enough that you could get it out of your vehicle yourself, so sounds like she was just grumpy.

suomi · August 3, 2020

For our bird lovers: I've heard of swifts but OK, whatever, just a bird. But holy crow (heh)! They stay aloft for as long as 10 months. They sleep, mate and eat while flying, they drink while swooping on water. The wings are too long to manage a takeoff from a horizontal surface and their legs are too short and weak to stand. This essay is long-ish, but way cool.

The Mysterious Life of Birds Who Never Come Down

Swifts spend all their time in the sky. What can their journeys tell us about the future?

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/07/29/magazine/vesper-flights.html

suomi · August 3, 2020

Hard to believe this isn't a photograph. "Wish I was at the Getty."

Beauty in blue

Jean-Étienne Liotard brought the medium of pastel to a level of rare perfection with his portrait of a 7-year-old girl

https://www.washingtonpost.com/graphics/2020/entertainment/jean-etienne-liotard-portrait-maria-frederike-van-reede-athlone/?hpid=hp_sundayarts-panel-8-12_liotard-gwif-0802%3Ahomepage%2Fstory-ans&itid=hp_sundayarts-panel-8-12_liotard-gwif-0802%3Ahomepage%2Fstory-ans

Gramto6 · August 3, 2020

I have been to the Getty years ago. It was an awesome experience! The artwork there is breathtaking!

Meowwww · August 3, 2020

On 8/2/2020 at 11:46 AM, suomi said:

I think it's a safety issue because tailgates are heavy and "come at you" when they open. I haven't had a p/u since the '90s and the gate was never my favorite feature. Are they hydraulic on newer vehicles?

Dogs in trucks is a thing here. I saw a family leash their dog through the back slider and the wife held the leash while hubby opened and closed the tailgate. The employee and the hubby did a cute do-si-do getting out of each other's way. LOL. People-watching is entertaining.

I have a 2019 truck. I push the tailgate button, it pops open an inch then lowers verrrry slowly. It must be hydraulic because you can’t pull on it to make it go faster.

Teafortwo · August 4, 2020

Please allow me to vent a small bit.

I dread doing laundry in the my small building's basement laundry room. It's always dirty and we have a terrible family living on the ground floor who never remove their stuff from the machines. I put off doing wash for over 2 weeks and started at 11 pm tonight to avoid running into anyone. I dried my clothes for over an hour because our dryers don't work well. (They were repaired a few weeks ago but the bad family puts too much bulky heavy stuff in them so they break again. Rugs, king sized quilts etc. So it's 1 am and walk down 4 flights only to find my stuff has not dried at all. I put it in the other dryer and now it's dry. But now I feel like it's not clean since it was tumbling in the broken dryer for over an hour. Who knows what other stuff before mine was in there not drying? I feel like I have to start over again tomorrow.

We only have 2 washers and 2 dryers. For some reason no one else ever reports these problems to our manager (I emailed them already). Management responds and sends repairman very quickly. The issue is my shit neighbors. The bad family is a French chef and his Brazilian wife (speaks almost no English) and their two lovely girls under the age of 8. The chef is a hot head. You literally can't ask him to flatten a cardboard box (per recycling rules here they have to be flattened) withoit him getting irate and "it's my property, you can't tell me what to do). He's done illegal renovations without getting required permission from our board and management co and permits from the city. The board never reprimands him. It is just awful. They can't or won't even follow the pictures on big stickers on our recycling bins showing how/what to recycle - they put dirty plaatic and glass containers and even dirty diapers in our recycling bins.

We're supposed to keep our hallways clear and there are 6 bicycles in the ground floor entryway. SIX. Plus baby carriages. My next door neighbor is another bad actor. He has a shelf with two rows of shoes, a ladder and umbrella stand outside his apt, plus a bathmat instead of a doormat, with 3 additional pairs of shoes carelessly kicked off and floating in the hallway so you have to step over them to use the stairs. I can't complain because he will retaliate by slamming his door so hard my walls shake and cranking his stereo. Also because I have 2 pairs of shoes by my door (but not encroaching on the walkway) and I don't want to have to bring them inside, which the Board will have to tell me to do if they reprimand him. So I say nothing.

The Board president doesn't live here because his apt is undergoing renovation that started 2 weeks before covid hit, and has been protracted as a result. But he's so non-confrontational that I doubt he'd do anything even if he were here. Even though he lives above me and used to see the pile of my next door neighbor's shoes every day.

I love my neighborhood and I used to love my building but it's just gone to hell. The hot headed chef did not have the Brazilian wife when he purchased the apt. Tragically, his first wife, who was lovely and had an upper management job with a large clothing retailer, died of cancer about 8 months after they moved in. The Brazilian wife would follow the rules if he told her to, but he is the worst violator. He got angry with me when I alerted him to the fact that his king sized quilt had caused the then brand new washing machine to malfunction (at the end of the cycle it was full of water and suds - the spin cycle could not handle such a large item. That was over 2 years ago and I've never said anything to him again. There are pictures on the machine showing that you should leave several inches of empty space above your items.

Thanks for listening. I know that so many are undergoing much worse than this minor annoyance but I'm just fed up!

PS Right now there are only 8 other residents (including the shit family) besides me living here. You'd think 2 washer and 2 dryers would be sufficient and that harmony and consideration could be obtainable but unfortunately not. The shoe/loud music neighbor is an entitled late 20s whose father bought him the apt 6 years ago. He was away traveling for a year which was wonderful but unfortunately he returned in June.

Edited August 4, 2020 by Teafortwo

Yeah No · August 4, 2020

6 hours ago, Teafortwo said:

Please allow me to vent a small bit.

Ah, the specific "joys" of living in NYC. 😏

Tea, having lived in apartments in NY for so much of my life, I really understand your feelings here. Boards are worthless. You mentioned a building manager - can you talk to them or their boss/company about this stuff? Because I know that a lot of what you are describing wouldn't be allowed in my father's building and the manager would be all in their faces about these things. Unless you have a weak manager. The one in my dad's building is like "Cynthia" from those Geico commercials - you know, the woman that chops down the mailbox with a chainsaw because it's "two inches over regulation". The owners thanking her is no joke - the manager can make your life miserable if you aren't cooperative. I know I have complained about her and the management co. but at least that building is run like a tight ship. So there are trade-offs to this situation.

"Sigh", to live in a building with the bicycles and baby carriages in the hallway again.....Nostalgia. But in my case they were at least hidden under the stairway or in the basement hallway and not in the way. And all that other stuff would be removed as a "fire code violation". A dirty laundry room especially in the pandemic would be cleaned up post haste.

But I know how limited you are in getting resolution (or peace) on any of this no matter what you do. There are so many annoyances people put up with to live in NYC and I know how the older I get the less I would be willing to put up with them, which is one big reason I'm not renovating my Dad's apartment and moving into it. Once upon a time we might have considered doing that. It's a shame, but I'm living with it. And don't worry about it feeling like "small stuff" compared to what others are going through. I also imagine that being home more because of the pandemic is only heightening the annoyance factor. If you have annoying neighbors, suddenly that becomes a bigger issue when you're home more. I remember when I lived in NYC I was out a lot so my own annoying neighbors didn't bother me as much as they would now. No way would I live with that now.

It sounds like you live in a walk-up. What you talk about reminds me of my girlfriend's building when she lived in Park Slope. I would have given my right ear to live in that neighborhood, but she was forced out when the building owners (this was a rental) decided to do a major building renovation so they could cash in on co-oping it. Unfortunately she couldn't find anything affordable in Brooklyn after that and ended up in Flushing, which was inconvenient for her in a lot of ways. She ended up back in the Bronx in a rental where she started out (of course she never listened to me that she should buy a co-op in several neighborhoods, including my father's building, before they went sky high). She's my oldest friend that's in the hospital right now - The mass was removed and she's feeling MUCH better. They're just waiting for the biopsy results before letting her go home but they don't think it's cancer. I'm doing my best to be optimistic.

Anyway, if you ever get tired enough I might be able to give you some advice about moving out. I used to call myself "the idiot savant of real estate" because I seem to have an innate knowledge about it, especially in the NY/CT area. Let me know! Hugs to you and don't hesitate to vent again when necessary!

Edited August 4, 2020 by Yeah No

TurtlePower · August 4, 2020

52 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

Ah, the specific "joys" of living in NYC. 😏

Tea, having lived in apartments in NY for so much of my life, I really understand your feelings here. Boards are worthless. You mentioned a building manager - can you talk to them or their boss/company about this stuff? Because I know that a lot of what you are describing wouldn't be allowed in my father's building and the manager would be all in their faces about these things. Unless you have a weak manager. The one in my dad's building is like "Cynthia" from those Geico commercials - you know, the woman that chops down the mailbox with a chainsaw because it's "two inches over regulation". The owners thanking her is no joke - the manager can make your life miserable if you aren't cooperative. I know I have complained about her and the management co. but at least that building is run like a tight ship. So there are trade-offs to this situation.

"Sigh", to live in a building with the bicycles and baby carriages in the hallway again.....Nostalgia. But in my case they were at least hidden under the stairway or in the basement hallway and not in the way. And all that other stuff would be removed as a "fire code violation". A dirty laundry room especially in the pandemic would be cleaned up post haste.

But I know how limited you are in getting resolution (or peace) on any of this no matter what you do. There are so many annoyances people put up with to live in NYC and I know how the older I get the less I would be willing to put up with them, which is one big reason I'm not renovating my Dad's apartment and moving into it. Once upon a time we might have considered doing that. It's a shame, but I'm living with it. And don't worry about it feeling like "small stuff" compared to what others are going through. I also imagine that being home more because of the pandemic is only heightening the annoyance factor. If you have annoying neighbors, suddenly that becomes a bigger issue when you're home more. I remember when I lived in NYC I was out a lot so my own annoying neighbors didn't bother me as much as they would now. No way would I live with that now.

It sounds like you live in a walk-up. What you talk about reminds me of my girlfriend's building when she lived in Park Slope. I would have given my right ear to live in that neighborhood, but she was forced out when the building owners (this was a rental) decided to do a major building renovation so they could cash in on co-oping it. Unfortunately she couldn't find anything affordable in Brooklyn after that and ended up in Flushing, which was inconvenient for her in a lot of ways. She ended up back in the Bronx in a rental where she started out (of course she never listened to me that she should buy a co-op in several neighborhoods, including my father's building, before they went sky high). She's my oldest friend that's in the hospital right now - The mass was removed and she's feeling MUCH better. They're just waiting for the biopsy results before letting her go home but they don't think it's cancer. I'm doing my best to be optimistic.

Anyway, if you ever get tired enough I might be able to give you some advice about moving out. I used to call myself "the idiot savant of real estate" because I seem to have an innate knowledge about it, especially in the NY/CT area. Let me know! Hugs to you and don't hesitate to vent again when necessary!

I am fascinated by NYC culture. I find myself wondering why people are willing to pay so much for tiny apartments (and also hoping that their job pays well). It was the same when I was working in Israel--some people I knew lived in Ramat Gan and it was this teeeeeeny apartment they paid one million (equivalent) dollars for. I learned Israel is a very expensive country to live in.

I grew up in the sticks on 200 acres of farmland, limestone caves and woods so it is difficult for me to imagine living in expensive, small spaces. I like to be able to run and hide from people 😆

Teafortwo · August 4, 2020

6 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Boards are worthless. You mentioned a building manager - can you talk to them or their boss/company about this stuff?

Believe me, I've tried. The building manager sends out notices that no one reads. In Feb. they sent out a mailing saying that any items left in the hallways would be removed and discarded. Never followed through. There isn't much they can do - they are not on site.

Thanks for your long and detailed response. I know you understand my predicament and yes, it is worse now that I am home all the time.

PS I found out this morning that the coop board KNEW about the broken dryer but did not have the courtesy to let the rest of us know. They are apparently now discussing the pros and cons of repairing vs. replacing so it may take awhile. Anything new that they buy will be subject to destruction by the terrible chef's family anyway.

I'm just trying to enjoy the fact that this is the first day in the 70s in probably six weeks, and I have the windows open to a nice breeze. I've lived here for 25 years and this is the worst board we've ever had. I was on the board myself for over 10 years and oversaw major capital improvements (new boiler and hot water heater; conversion from oil to natural gas heat that included rebuilding and relining the chimney, and on and on). I got maneuvered off the board when new people started moving in. For awhile it was a relief not to deal with all the issues but these past several years it's just been awful. Sigh....

Teafortwo · August 4, 2020

5 hours ago, TurtlePower said:

I am fascinated by NYC culture. I find myself wondering why people are willing to pay so much for tiny apartments (and also hoping that their job pays well)

There has been quite an exodus lately - renters, especially those working from home, have been leaving in droves for the suburbs, which now have bidding wars and often cash-only transactions on home purchases. It's crazy. People compare it to 9/11, but it is not the same at all. We went through a few months of declines/anthrax scares but after awhile more people wanted to live in the city than ever and prices jumped. I know, because I was fortunate to be able to buy my apartment in 2000, after renting it from the previous owner for 5 years. So I got in before the craziness in prices. However if and when I were to sell, I would face large taxes and other expenses, leaving not much left to move anywhere else.

Kohola3 · August 4, 2020

I am so sorry for all of you living in that nightmare. I know that many people living in NYC )or downtown in any large city) love it but I think I would hang myself if I had to live cheek-by-jowl with people I don't like!

On the other hand, I am at least 3 hours from culture of any kind and I do miss museums, theaters, and so forth. And local restaurants are all mom and pop greasy spoons. So there are definitely trade offs!

Teafortwo · August 5, 2020

5 hours ago, Kohola3 said:

I am so sorry for all of you living in that nightmare. I know that many people living in NYC )or downtown in any large city) love it but I think I would hang myself if I had to live cheek-by-jowl with people I don't like!

On the other hand, I am at least 3 hours from culture of any kind and I do miss museums, theaters, and so forth. And local restaurants are all mom and pop greasy spoons. So there are definitely trade offs!

Thanks, yeah, in normal times it was mostly tolerable - and I often went to the local laundromat, which was very clean and had enough machines where I could do two or three loads at once and get the whole thing done, including walking there and back, in about 2 hours. Without going up and down 4 flights of stairs to the basement multiple times.

And I'm not eating out at all, so though I do miss some restaurants they are off the table (so to speak). I'm trying to focus on the things I love about my space and my large north-facing windows where I can see the sky, but sometimes, like last night, I get derailed.

suomi · August 5, 2020

Has anyone tried freezing fat cells? I don't want liposuction and can't afford Cool Sculpting. I get frighteningly short of breath with anything more than minimal exertion around the house so walking and swimming are out of the question. I probably could bounce and walk in a pool because the supporting water would provide some momentum but public pools are out of the question now.

No excess fat in arms, legs or back only my abdomen and that is the most dangerous fat. My doctor said walking would be easier if I was moving a smaller load. I'm hoping to make a difference in what I ask of my body.

I bought a home system on Amazon for $100. You freeze three gel packs (that remain flexible when frozen) and load them into pockets on a wrap-around belt. You start with 5-10 minutes and work up to 60 minutes, 3 times per week, and gently massage the cold area (using your preferred lotion) for a few minutes when you're done. The frozen fat cells die and become waste and are slowly flushed out of your body when you use the toilet. A full course is 10-12 weeks.

I decided to try it after reading positive reviews and seeing very impressive before-and-after weekly photos on Amazon. I registered the extensive warranty at the product website and asked two questions and both times received an answer within a few hours. They will replace up to three gel packs for free during the first 12 months.

The recommended loss range is 10-20 pounds and I'm hoping to say adios to at least 15 pounds and hopefully 20. If you gain weight again it will happen in a different area so I am keeping "be careful what you wish for" in mind.

So that's why I'm wondering if anyone has tried it, professional or do-it-yourself, and if it worked for you. (Or someone you know).

crazycatlady58 · August 5, 2020

@suomi please let us know if it worked.

suomi · August 5, 2020

@crazycatlady58

Measuring once a week is suggested and I'm a couple days and one more treatment shy of that but I noticed a difference this morning.

I blame my weight gain on a few things. Heh. For 10 years I raced from one patient to another while bending, stretching and lifting for eight hours a day. Five years into that, when my weight was fine, I was told to stop many years of hormone replacement therapy (don't have even a speck of an ovary anymore) at the same time I started a few years on an anti-depressant. Wearing scrubs all day and yoga pants at night lulled me into denying my expanding waistline, and my stack of jeans gathered cobwebs.

Stopping the HRT resulted in instant menopause and I went an entire winter without wearing a jacket even when the temps were well below freezing - blessed relief from hot flashes. It took nearly a year to taper off the anti-depressant and I'm glad I don't take it anymore. I was diagnosed with emphysema five years ago and its progression has kicked my ability to exercise in the teeth. I was skinny-to-slender all my life until I ran into a perfect storm of medical issues.

When I retired I started living in Soma Cool Nights Sleepshirts, 93% rayon/7% spandex. They are so cute! I have probably a dozen of them, Large and XL because I had to size-up four years ago. I sleep in them of course and wear them with leggings when I run errands.

The XL sizing varies a bit, I swim in some and others are just loose and comfy and I wear those outside in the yard. The Large sizing is consistent, it hugs my fat middle and requires constant adjusting (because of the spandex) so I wear those inside where only my sister sees me. She likes to walk by and say "Boop" while poking me in the belly. Grrr.

Imagine my surprise today when I realized I was outside watering in a Large leopard print and it wasn't hugging my gut. When I came inside I verified in front of a mirror that the fabric doesn't hang up when I twist my torso or reach for something. It takes a few weeks for murdered fat cells to entirely leave the body but I will guess I lost at least an inch after two 60-minute treatments. Stoked! My goal is 10 inches.

crazycatlady58 · August 5, 2020

Do they feel very cold? Living near Houston in the summer you need all the cooling you can get.

suomi · August 5, 2020

Definitely very cold. It reaches a point where it begins to register as uncomfortable but it's fleeting and I go back to merely being aware that it's very cold. LOL, maybe that's when the murdering begins.

The belt is 8 inches wide and 51 inches long, with a 3x5 inch velcro closure. The gel packs sit in three separate pockets right next to each other, 7 inches wide and 30 inches long altogether. That 30 inches covers the side of my body as well. You wear it any way you want, high or low, backward, sideways, etc. Each pocket has a thick plastic divider and the packs sit on either side of it. You can choose to use the divider as an extra barrier from the cold, that's what I've done because I'm a newbie. Not ready to try the right close position yet.

There are smaller belts for legs and thighs, and you could load one or two gel packs in this big belt for those areas. But I'm guessing 51 inches of belt would be annoying on an arm or leg.

The reviews and photos on Amazon helped me decide. Didn't check prices anywhere else, just went with Amazon Prime 2-day free delivery. Once I made up my mind I wanted it Now.

ETA This process was discovered while studying the effects of frostbite. It was observed that fat cells were either greatly reduced in number or no longer existed in areas of the body that recovered from frostbite and returned to normal.

https://isavera.com/

Edited August 5, 2020 by suomi

Yeah No · August 6, 2020

I wish I could join in on the discussion, but I'm living through yet another nightmare right now. I don't know if any of you have followed the news regarding that storm that went up the East coast the other day but it hit CT really hard and something like 700,000 residents were left without power, me and most of my town and most of the adjacent towns were among them. Although the storm didn't feel that bad and I don't see half the destruction of other storms like Sandy and Irene, they tell us it was bad enough to cause all of this trouble. I hear there are a lot of power outages in NY and NJ as well. I don't have to tell all of you that we are all dealing with a lot already and now this - It feels like a conspiracy to prevent me from taking care of my father's apartment. I'm not going down to NY with all this going on. We are staying in a local hotel in another town which thankfully has power for the next couple of nights, but now I hear that it may take days, even WEEKS before power is restored. I can't believe this! Everyone is angry at the power company, and people around here were already angry at them for jacking up rates last month which nearly DOUBLED people's bills! The state legislature had just put a hold on that insane rate increase after many of our usually meek and mild mannered residents staged a huge protest at the capital and signed a petition which has well over 100,000 signatures already! And now they're under fire and investigation for this as well. They were supposed to have spent tons of money to be prepared for storms like this, and it's just more of the same old incompetence.

This comes very soon after we spent almost a week w/o air conditioning in 95+ degree weather! And it's going up into the 90s again next week! I don't know how long I'll be able to continue to stay here - I know it's pretty crowded already and I don't know if they'll let us extend our reservation. We have a generator but have only been able to hook things up to it with extension cords so the AC is not possible, and I left the rolling AC in my father's apartment to use there. So we're totally screwed. This is a dire situation. People are acting crazy and there was a bad accident on the main road near me this morning. I don't really have the money to stay here but we just couldn't take more sweltering nights. Fortunately one of my husband's local rich clients is away and is letting us use his fridge - He has one of those very expensive whole house generators. So we packed up all the stuff from the fridge into big garbage bags and stuffed them into his Sub Zero. I had to leave some things like ketchup, mustard and BBQ sauce because there wasn't enough room, so I know things are going to spoil and get thrown away. It's unavoidable. He thinks he may have a few days propane left but he's not sure how long it will last - We may lose a couple of hundred dollars worth of groceries. He offered us to stay at his house but we don't feel comfortable with that - where would we sleep? We'd feel awkward. We needed this right now like a hole in the head. My stress level is through the roof! My best friend is STILL in the hospital - they are still trying to figure out what's wrong with her.

I have to tell you guys, even my usually optimistic husband is now telling me he is right there with me in terms of attitude about all of this. WTF????? Our parents NEVER had to deal with ANYTHING even CLOSE to this at this point in their lives. They were able to retire in relative peace and not feel like it's the freaking apocalypse around every corner every freaking DAY.

Anyway, @Teafortwo, I'm sorry I can't respond more right now to your posts and to others here as well. I hate to once AGAIN ask for prayers but here I am. I seriously don't know how much more of this I can take. How many tragedies and disasters can one person have to deal with in only a few months and not have a breakdown already? I'm really trying my best but it's getting harder all the time. The saying "this too shall pass" also won't help because every time I think I'm past the worst of it, another blow is just around the corner.

Kbo · August 6, 2020

12 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I wish I could join in on the discussion, but I'm living through yet another nightmare right now. I don't know if any of you have followed the news regarding that storm that went up the East coast the other day but it hit CT really hard and something like 700,000 residents were left without power, me and most of my town and most of the adjacent towns were among them. Although the storm didn't feel that bad and I don't see half the destruction of other storms like Sandy and Irene, they tell us it was bad enough to cause all of this trouble. I hear there are a lot of power outages in NY and NJ as well. I don't have to tell all of you that we are all dealing with a lot already and now this - It feels like a conspiracy to prevent me from taking care of my father's apartment. I'm not going down to NY with all this going on. We are staying in a local hotel in another town which thankfully has power for the next couple of nights, but now I hear that it may take days, even WEEKS before power is restored. I can't believe this! Everyone is angry at the power company, and people around here were already angry at them for jacking up rates last month which nearly DOUBLED people's bills! The state legislature had just put a hold on that insane rate increase after many of our usually meek and mild mannered residents staged a huge protest at the capital and signed a petition which has well over 100,000 signatures already! And now they're under fire and investigation for this as well. They were supposed to have spent tons of money to be prepared for storms like this, and it's just more of the same old incompetence.

This comes very soon after we spent almost a week w/o air conditioning in 95+ degree weather! And it's going up into the 90s again next week! I don't know how long I'll be able to continue to stay here - I know it's pretty crowded already and I don't know if they'll let us extend our reservation. We have a generator but have only been able to hook things up to it with extension cords so the AC is not possible, and I left the rolling AC in my father's apartment to use there. So we're totally screwed. This is a dire situation. People are acting crazy and there was a bad accident on the main road near me this morning. I don't really have the money to stay here but we just couldn't take more sweltering nights. Fortunately one of my husband's local rich clients is away and is letting us use his fridge - He has one of those very expensive whole house generators. So we packed up all the stuff from the fridge into big garbage bags and stuffed them into his Sub Zero. I had to leave some things like ketchup, mustard and BBQ sauce because there wasn't enough room, so I know things are going to spoil and get thrown away. It's unavoidable. He thinks he may have a few days propane left but he's not sure how long it will last - We may lose a couple of hundred dollars worth of groceries. He offered us to stay at his house but we don't feel comfortable with that - where would we sleep? We'd feel awkward. We needed this right now like a hole in the head. My stress level is through the roof! My best friend is STILL in the hospital - they are still trying to figure out what's wrong with her.

I have to tell you guys, even my usually optimistic husband is now telling me he is right there with me in terms of attitude about all of this. WTF????? Our parents NEVER had to deal with ANYTHING even CLOSE to this at this point in their lives. They were able to retire in relative peace and not feel like it's the freaking apocalypse around every corner every freaking DAY.

Anyway, @Teafortwo, I'm sorry I can't respond more right now to your posts and to others here as well. I hate to once AGAIN ask for prayers but here I am. I seriously don't know how much more of this I can take. How many tragedies and disasters can one person have to deal with in only a few months and not have a breakdown already? I'm really trying my best but it's getting harder all the time. The saying "this too shall pass" also won't help because every time I think I'm past the worst of it, another blow is just around the corner.

@Yeah No, I am so sorry 🙁. I know words don’t help much when it feels like your world is spinning off it’s axis, but sending you big hugs and warm thoughts. Wait, make that cool, refreshing thoughts 😉. Hope they get your power restored soon!

HighlandWarriorGrl · August 6, 2020

17 hours ago, suomi said:

There are smaller belts for legs and thighs, and you could load one or two gel packs in this big belt for those areas. But I'm guessing 51 inches of belt would be annoying on an arm or leg.

The reviews and photos on Amazon helped me decide. Didn't check prices anywhere else, just went with Amazon Prime 2-day free delivery. Once I made up my mind I wanted it Now.

ETA This process was discovered while studying the effects of frostbite. It was observed that fat cells were either greatly reduced in number or no longer existed in areas of the body that recovered from frostbite and returned to normal.

https://isavera.com/

I tried looking on Amazon for the system and all I saw was the arm, leg, and “man-boob” sets. No belly set, which is where I need the help! Strange. Maybe they are sold out. Keep us posted on your progress because I’m definitely interested!

suomi · August 6, 2020

@HighlandWarriorGrl

The belly system is available at the company website for what I paid at Amazon - $99. I don't know anything about the shipping cost/speed.

The arm/leg belts are out of stock there.

laurakaye · August 6, 2020

@Yeah No...without going into detail, a few years ago I went through something similar for about five months. It got to the point that there was not one member of my immediate family that wasn't going through something life-changing (including both of my kids) and I got to a point where I somehow basically logged into my brain and flipped the "Emotions" switch to OFF because someone had to be the strong one and that someone, I decided, was going to have to be me. I still am not sure how I got through everything, but when I look back I recall telling myself many, many, MANY times that I had to take things one day at a time, and when that was too much - one hour at a time. Literally. I would sometimes take a post-it note and write down each hour and then cross it off when it passed. I was able to be strong for everyone else, but at a cost to myself in the form of anxiety which reared its ugly head a couple of years later, triggered by something that I still don't understand. This year has been a royal b!tch to so many people in a myriad of ways. All I can say is that you HAVE to disconnect once in awhile and do what you need to do to take care of yourself, even if it's just for a small part of the day. For me, it was taking the long way home after work so I could cry in my car. "This too shall pass" means absolutely nothing when you're in the thick of the storm.

Edited August 6, 2020 by laurakaye

Yeah No · August 7, 2020

7 hours ago, Kbo said:

@Yeah No, I am so sorry 🙁. I know words don’t help much when it feels like your world is spinning off it’s axis, but sending you big hugs and warm thoughts. Wait, make that cool, refreshing thoughts 😉. Hope they get your power restored soon!

Thank you so much - fortunately we got our power back today so we checked out of the hotel. We were so exhausted we went right home and vegged out in front of "Guy's Grocery Games". We were very lucky as we know a few people who are still without power even in our town. Thank goodness, we needed the break! Then later I had to go to the PO with an eBay sale so Mr. Yeah No said why don't we go together since he needed to get the new limo. washed and we wanted to get something for dinner since all of our food is in someone else's fridge and we're just too bushed to deal with that today. That house is still w/o power but the generator should still be on until we get there tomorrow.

So we ended up going to Taco Bell. We thought we could go inside for carry out because the stretch limo. is too long to fit through that particular drive through. I went in while he waited in the lot. As soon as I walked inside I was told by the clerks that the restaurant is actually closed for carry out and that I'd either have to go through the drive through or order from their app to get curbside pickup as per company policy. OK, whatever, so I went outside and ordered that way. Then I realized that the only option they gave us for pickup was going through the drive through. So I decided to go back to the store to tell them our order number and where we were parked so they could bring it to us. On the way there I tripped and fell. Now mind you, they had just done construction on the walkway to the door and had put tape up so you don't walk there, so I went around that and the curb was so high my foot "missed" and I took a tumble. Meanwhile if I could have walked on the section that was taped off that wouldn't have happened because it had a "depression" where pedestrians can walk without having to step up. And of course where I had to step up was insanely high for a curb of any kind. Anyway, I scraped my knee mildly and my wrist is a little sore, but the worst part is where my underwire bra pinched me under my breast. Ugh, that hurts. I've iced everything and have taken Tylenol and feel better, but what an ordeal. My husband saw me fall and quickly ran to me to pick me up. A man waiting in his car at the drive through also rushed to my aid. He saw my husband cutting in and apologized saying he was only trying to help. I guess he thought he was not appreciated. I said, "No, you're OK, thanks for your concern, it's just that he's my husband". He helped me up and I hobbled over to the car. Then he got up and went over to the restaurant and banged on the window, only this time he was joined by two other men trying to achieve the same thing. At this point the line at the drive thru was so long no one wanted to sit on it after ordering online. I guess everyone without power was looking for a quick meal. Anyway when my husband told the clerk what had happened he apologized profusely and brought the food out to us right away with several additional treats like cookies and cinnamon twists (just what me and my pandemic weight gain need now).

Anyway, I enjoyed the food but I am exhausted now and my ribs still ache. Ugh. And the hits just keep on comin'!

In better news, my girlfriend is being released from the hospital tomorrow. They still don't know what's wrong with her but they are loading her up with doctor appointments and tests. I feel for her because she's not feeling 100% plus lives alone and has to deal with all of that in NY without a car. At least she is used to ordering all her groceries online now.

I think I just need a few days of absolute rest.

Thanks to all of you for your good wishes.

Gramto6 · August 7, 2020

@Yeah No ((((hugs)))) and 🙏🙏🙏

Teafortwo · August 7, 2020

22 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I'm really trying my best but it's getting harder all the time. The saying "this too shall pass" also won't help because every time I think I'm past the worst of it, another blow is just around the corner.

No need to apologize. You're doing your best and that's all any of us can do. And I agree, "this too shall pass" doesn't work with so many overlapping crises. It's all just too much. I'm glad you were able to save your food at least for now -- hoping the propane lasts to keep the generator going until the power is restored over at the client's house.

My neighborhood was spared the power outages, thank goodness, but we have lots of beautiful old trees that were knocked over by the wind. The area near where I was staying when I was down at the Jersey shore during the first part of the pandemic had a tornado hit them, in addition to the storm. A large part of NJ is also still without power. People are begging the electric company to come remove the downed power lines in their driveways.

Glad you were able to get online and let us know what is going on, so we can keep you in our best thoughts.

ETA I just saw your latest post, thank goodness your power is back on -- and your fall wasn't worse! Hope you and hubby can get some good rest tonight.

Edited August 7, 2020 by Teafortwo

suomi · August 7, 2020

Unfortunately, NOAA has labeled this hurricane season as "extremely active." Twenty-four named storms are predicted and twenty-one letters are allotted per season. If it goes as expected they will finish the season using the Greek alphabet. Twelve hurricanes and five major hurricanes are expected, almost doubling what is normal. This could put this season on a par with records set in 2005. (Katrina and Wilma). Isiais is the fifth landfall storm this year, putting the season two weeks ahead of pace.

Edited August 7, 2020 by suomi
typo

Olliesmom · August 7, 2020

On 8/4/2020 at 11:21 PM, Teafortwo said:

Thanks, yeah, in normal times it was mostly tolerable - and I often went to the local laundromat, which was very clean and had enough machines where I could do two or three loads at once and get the whole thing done, including walking there and back, in about 2 hours. Without going up and down 4 flights of stairs to the basement multiple times.

And I'm not eating out at all, so though I do miss some restaurants they are off the table (so to speak). I'm trying to focus on the things I love about my space and my large north-facing windows where I can see the sky, but sometimes, like last night, I get derailed.

I grew up in Queens, NY and now live In a small condo complex - 8 units - in CT. The board is useless so I feel your pain. I go to to the local laundromat. No stress, even with Coven and the coin shortage lol. And, it’s takes far less time.

Yeah No · August 7, 2020

2 hours ago, Teafortwo said:

Glad you were able to get online and let us know what is going on, so we can keep you in our best thoughts.

ETA I just saw your latest post, thank goodness your power is back on -- and your fall wasn't worse! Hope you and hubby can get some good rest tonight.

Thank you! Don't look now, but I think I may have bruised or fractured a rib. I know I should see a doctor but so far it doesn't seem that bad judging from the list of possible symptoms I'm reading online, like "shortness of breath" when breathing deeply. I can breath deeply without stabbing pain. I have some pain upon breathing deeply but it doesn't inhibit me from doing so, even when the Tylenol wears off. I am feeling the same level of pain when I cough or attempt to bend too far. It's right under my right breast where the band of my bra sits. I think the underwire may have been to blame as my body never hit the ground so it didn't happen as a result of blunt trauma. Otherwise my knee and wrist are absolutely fine. I have been continually icing my rib area, which helps. Getting up from a prone position on the couch is a challenge without pain because of the twisting involved. I need to brace myself a lot. I don't think getting up out of bed is going to be as bad because the bed is higher and it's easier to get up without as much effort.

I really, really, really don't want to have to see a doctor. I know there could be complications like the rib pressing on an organ if there's a fracture but I think if it was that bad I'd be in much worse pain, and I don't even have any of the symptoms they list for any of those complications. Hubbie fractured a rib falling off a bicycle years ago and he was in much more pain. I didn't even feel this happen and there was no pain at all until I got home 20 minutes later.

I swear I'm not superstitious but it's like there's a conspiracy to keep me from dealing with that freaking apartment! I'm not going to let this stop me. I won't bend and lift anything but I will make my husband do that stuff without any hesitation because frankly last time he just stood there while I did all the grunt work. I may offer to be the driver both ways, though, which is fine with me. I'm not going to go there until next week now anyway so hopefully I'll be feeling a little better by then. If my symptoms don't improve I will break down and see a doctor. I'm also going to talk with a friend who was once an athlete and knows a lot about such injuries.

Note to self: Buy more wire-free bras.

Yeah No · August 7, 2020

On 8/4/2020 at 10:44 AM, TurtlePower said:

I am fascinated by NYC culture. I find myself wondering why people are willing to pay so much for tiny apartments (and also hoping that their job pays well).

New York continues to attract people who go there for their careers because there are obviously more opportunities there than many other places. Plus the culture is a lure, especially for young people because there's just so much to do there. You would never get bored or be without people around. There are so many people that you can find your "niche" or your milieu. It was great being young in NYC. It was where "it was at" and everything happened. You could meet famous people just walking down the street. Even humble people could have regular contact with famous people in their daily jobs. Plus there are a gazillion fantastic restaurants and cultural institutions to peruse. There is deep history and up to the moment trendiness, wherever you look. If you want to join a group for any interest, it exists there. You don't have to search very hard. Even if you don't have any affiliations the city itself is an interest. You can let it all happen around you and see something amazing every day. I grew up with this and was spoiled by it. An introvert by nature, I was used to just watching the daily show without having to interact much with it.

My husband is a self-taught church historian of NYC. He can tell the church on a TV show almost immediately. He will also point out when the outside photos of the church don't match the inside, LOL. We can name the Manhattan neighborhood just by seeing a brief flash on the screen. We have frozen the frame on TV shows and movies and discussed which streets we were looking at in a birds eye view. Even though I rarely go there this knowledge is innate to me from having grown up in the city and spending the first 33 years of my life living there.

Unfortunately, the quaint culture that was NY in the 20th century has seen a lot of erosion and change in the 20 years since then, and for a lot of us "old timers" the changes haven't been for the better. Even a lot of the relative "new timers" feel the same way! The city became even more expensive than it was in the 2000s and 2010s because of rich trust fund babies that flooded in from what they considered their culturally deprived suburbs. This same phenomenon happened in a lot of cities around the world. Unfortunately they ended up hastening the demise of the quaintness that drew them to NY in the first place by bringing their own culture with them. The rising prices they caused drove small "mom and pop" stores to close and many, many iconic places that made NY the wonderful place it always was slowly vanished. The phenomenon continues to happen. I don't go to NY much anymore but I am told not to pay attention to the changes because it would really damage my soul. I used to follow a blog and Facebook page called "Jeremiah's Vanishing NY" but had to stop because it was too painful. The NYC that my parents loved so much was vanishing before my eyes. Critics say that NY was always changing a lot but they just don't get it. This is a complete change of character, not just things coming and going at the usual pace being replaced by similar things. It's been nothing short of a city losing its soul.

So unfortunately now the pandemic is causing its own issues in NYC that are prompting a lot of the rich transplants to pick up stakes and leave. I could be quoted saying 10 years ago that these people would be the first to leave if ever NYC were to go through hard times for any reason again. So they descend upon the place, take it over, make it over in their soulless image and then leave at the first sign of trouble. I knew that was bound to happen sooner or later. I saw it happen in the bad old days of crack, crime and the homeless crisis, so I knew it would happen again. I don't blame anyone for leaving NYC right now, but there are a lot of people that can't afford to leave or are tied to the place because of their careers.

So anyway, I am one of those native NYers that feels gypped and cheated out of a wonderful place that my parents for the most part got to enjoy for most of their lives. Like a lot of people like me who moved out during the "crack and crime" epidemic 30 or so years ago, I have a love-hate relationship with the place. I never loved it more than during the "Sex and the City" era. I had such nostalgia and homesickness watching that show that I regretted leaving and wished I could go back. Hubbie and I used to discuss it once in a while. Of course, that was just before the place started changing for the worse. By about 2013 or so, we realized we didn't want to go back. And that hurt. I was still jealous of hubbie for being down in NY every week as a limo. driver. He got to continue to go to places during his down time that I could rarely visit myself. He would chronicle some of his visits on video which he would share with me. We would still go there on weekends once a month or so, but that pretty much stopped about 4 years ago. Now thanks to the pandemic, neither of us has reasons to go there other than to deal with my father's apartment in the Bronx. And we don't care to have any reason either. It's very, very sad. So I live with more than just the sadness I've spoken about before.

Anyway, I hope that helps explain some of my POV on this. My NYC best friend feels the same way. She isn't happy with what the city has become, but is pretty much trapped there now because she never learned how to drive. Don't get me started - I was always telling her she should learn. At this age it would be very hard to learn how to drive. I can tell many stories of people trying to get their licenses after the age of 40 (including my own grandmother) and none of them turned out very well. No one talks about this, but driving is one of those things you have to learn before a certain age or you most likely won't be very good at it. A friend of mine from high school's wife got her license at 40 and she has accidents all the time. And this is not a rare story, I could tell more. Pretty scary.

Yeah No · August 7, 2020

On 8/4/2020 at 4:46 PM, Teafortwo said:

There has been quite an exodus lately - renters, especially those working from home, have been leaving in droves for the suburbs, which now have bidding wars and often cash-only transactions on home purchases. It's crazy. People compare it to 9/11, but it is not the same at all. We went through a few months of declines/anthrax scares but after awhile more people wanted to live in the city than ever and prices jumped. I know, because I was fortunate to be able to buy my apartment in 2000, after renting it from the previous owner for 5 years. So I got in before the craziness in prices. However if and when I were to sell, I would face large taxes and other expenses, leaving not much left to move anywhere else.

I worry about that when selling my father's apartment. I know that you end up paying tons of taxes and fees from the co-op when you sell. That is why I tell people not to get too excited about what I'll have when it's all said and done. I've said it here before that I will be lucky to break even. Very sad.

Yeah No · August 7, 2020

10 hours ago, suomi said:

@HighlandWarriorGrl

The belly system is available at the company website for what I paid at Amazon - $99. I don't know anything about the shipping cost/speed.

The arm/leg belts are out of stock there.

I am REALLY interested in this. I'll have to look into it when I have time. I've been meaning to bring up whether anyone else was experiencing "pandemic weight gain". I have and it's been really alarming me because I was doing so well maintaining for a long time. Now no matter what I do it seems like I can't lose it for love or money. I might have gained 6-10 lbs. but on me it all goes to my stomach so it's not a pretty sight. Plus I am short 5'1.5" tall right now (I once was 5' 1 and 3/4" tall) so only a few pounds looks tremendous on me and makes me go up 1-2 sizes! Plus I tend to retain fluid worse in the summer and experience a little bit of a water weight gain every season anyway. It's gotten to the point where my summer pants are always a size larger than my winter pants (even with the water pills). But add the pandemic gain to that and it's really starting to depress me. I had heard about this and filed it away for "some day". If you report back here that you liked the results I might do it sooner!

Edited August 7, 2020 by Yeah No

suomi · August 7, 2020

I'm a country mouse so I don't like cities but I enjoy observing from a distance. Every Sunday I read Metropolitan Diary in the NY Times because the vignettes are interesting and entertaining, and sometimes touching. My two favorites this week:

Dear Diary:

It was the early ’70s, and we were at our favorite Chinatown restaurant. Our party of five included a former New York City junior high school teacher, Cathleen McDonnell Pietronuto.

As usual, the restaurant was crowded, and the noise level was getting out of control.

At some point, Cathy stood up.

“There is entirely too much noise in this room,” she announced in her classroom-tested voice.

Total silence.

Then a tentative voice piped up from across the dining room.

“Miss McDonnell?”

_ _ _

Dear Diary:

My wife and I came to New York in November 2002 for my second New York City Marathon. We splurged and booked a room at a boutique hotel near the New York Public Library, where runners board early morning buses that take them to where the race starts on Staten Island.

We registered at the desk with an assistant manager, who struck us as the type of well-mannered, middle-age gentleman one might encounter at a traditional European hotel.

I made conversation by mentioning the huge number of international runners I had seen. He volunteered that he was from what had been known as Czechoslovakia. We fell into an easy, extended chat about distance running.

Eventually, he insisted on personally showing us to the room we had booked on a lower floor. He seemed intent on continuing our conversation.

As he pulled our luggage trolley onto the elevator, a twinkle came to his eyes.

“I bet you don’t know the name of the greatest Czech distance runner of all time,” he said.

Somehow, my usually unreliable memory jumped to life.

“Um, yeah, Emil Zatopek,” I stammered.

His face lit up, and he beamed with pride.

After a moment’s reflection, he spoke again.

“The room you reserved just isn’t right for you,” he said. “Allow me to upgrade you to a larger suite on an upper floor.”

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/08/02/nyregion/metropolitan-diary.html

laurakaye · August 7, 2020

9 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Note to self: Buy more wire-free bras.

Not sure of your "situation" but if I'm bra shopping and it's got an underwire, it goes back on the hanger. If there's a comfortable brand of bras that have a wire, I'd love to know what it is because as far as I'm concerned they don't exist. And once the bra comes off after working and running errands and going for a walk, it does not go back on. I don't care. Fortunately it's not like they drop to my knees or anything like that but there are some unbreakable rules one must live by, and that's one of mine.

Apologies for the TMI. Carry on.

suomi · August 7, 2020

The genealogy site Ancestry has changed hands again, the third time in eleven years. The first time it sold for over a billion dollars; Blackstone just paid 4.7 billion.

Gee, didn"t realize family trees could be worth that much. /s

A whole lotta DNA results and other private information sold to the highest bidder. What could go wrong?

Edited August 7, 2020 by suomi

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