Small Talk: The Polygamous Cul-de-Sac

[AZChristian]

46 minutes ago, General Days said:

Do we have any thread to discuss all or some of the Brown parents as a group (the way we have the Brown Kids thread)? I paged through all the topics, and didn't find one, but I could have missed it.

Not that I'm aware of.  Each "parent" has their own thread, so having a group thread might cause confusion/duplication.  JMO.

However, I believe you could add a group thread on your own if you'd like.  Click on "Start Topic" at the top of the main Sister Wives board.

[General Days]

39 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

Not that I'm aware of.  Each "parent" has their own thread, so having a group thread might cause confusion/duplication.  JMO.

However, I believe you could add a group thread on your own if you'd like.  Click on "Start Topic" at the top of the main Sister Wives board.

 

Thanks, AZChristian. I knew I could add one, but I didn't want to duplicate something we already had. Now I don't even remember what I wanted to post about. 🤣

[Absolom]

If it's parenting across the family,  maybe the kids' thread works since it would affect the kids.

[General Days]

It was more about comparing how each of the parents functioned in polygamy and what it did to them (but I seriously don't even remember the angle now). It felt broader than what would belong in one wife's thread, or Kody's thread. And I'm not in the midst of a rewatch, so I didn't want to put it in that thread.

It's gone from my head. If it comes back, maybe I'll start a thread (although it seems a little silly this late into the series). 

[Roslyn]

55 minutes ago, General Days said:

It was more about comparing how each of the parents functioned in polygamy and what it did to them (but I seriously don't even remember the angle now). It felt broader than what would belong in one wife's thread, or Kody's thread. And I'm not in the midst of a rewatch, so I didn't want to put it in that thread.

It's gone from my head. If it comes back, maybe I'll start a thread (although it seems a little silly this late into the series). 

Maybe the "General Show Discussion " thread ?

[General Days]

15 hours ago, Roslyn said:

Maybe the "General Show Discussion " thread ?

 

Thank you! I was looking for it, and couldn't find it. I've found it now. I think I missed it, because the "jokey" name is first. If I was Empress of Primetimer, our thread format would be:

PLAIN NAME: JOKEY NAME 

[Yeah No]

Actually this thread is supposed to be for non-show related chit chat while the General Show Discussion thread is for what most of the discussion here has been about for a couple of months now.

[General Days]

38 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

Actually this thread is supposed to be for non-show related chit chat while the General Show Discussion thread is for what most of the discussion here has been about for a couple of months now.

Right. I always understood that Primetimer "Small Talk" threads were supposed to be like the old TWoP Meet Market threads, which actually had a "no show discussion" understanding.

The Meet Markets were chit chat only. When I tried to chat here in early November though, I was thread-nannied to the Primetimer-wide chit chat thread. 

I just couldn't find the General Show Discussion thread, which is pretty sad, since I posted in it less than a month ago. I missed it, when I was looking through all the thread titles yesterday, because of how it was named. So I was thinking the Rewatch thread was our only general show discussion thread (which also has the jokey name first).

Edited December 18, 2024 by General Days

[Yeah No]

23 hours ago, General Days said:

Right. I always understood that Primetimer "Small Talk" threads were supposed to be like the old TWoP Meet Market threads, which actually had a "no show discussion" understanding.

The Meet Markets were chit chat only. When I tried to chat here in early November though, I was thread-nannied to the Primetimer-wide chit chat thread. 

I just couldn't find the General Show Discussion thread, which is pretty sad, since I posted in it less than a month ago. I missed it, when I was looking through all the thread titles yesterday, because of how it was named. So I was thinking the Rewatch thread was our only general show discussion thread (which also has the jokey name first).

Sorry I didn't mean to make you feel like you had to explain yourself. It appears that I wrote my post at the same time you wrote your previous post so I didn't see that you had already found the general show thread.

Happy Holidays!

 

 

 

[Absolom]

Yes, I'm quite, quite, quite aware of the proper use of I and me and the methods for identifying which one to use as are all my children and grandchildren. I think the lesson was taught to them at age 2 to 3 and took five minutes or less. That is why hearing Christine misuse I as the object of a preposition irritates me so much.  

Johnny and me went to town would be irritating as well.  

They are both so basic.  No child left my classroom without understanding certain minimal grammar concepts.

Edited December 21, 2024 by Absolom

[Chalby]

6 hours ago, Absolom said:

Yes, I'm quite, quite, quite aware of the proper use of I and me and the methods for identifying which one to use as are all my children and grandchildren. 

I wasn't implying your grammar isn't proper.

The whole point of me sharing my 'quick fix' example was because I became aware of how difficult certain grammar "rules" are for many people.

I only wanted to make a suggestion for anyone reading the forum thinking, 'I get those two (me I) confused, as well.' 

(I also question a child fully understanding the difference at 2 or 3.)

Edited December 21, 2024 by Chalby

[Absolom]

I'm sure the kids couldn't have explained the why of the rules, but they were surprisingly able to use I and me correctly.

[LilyD]

On 12/21/2024 at 4:32 AM, Chalby said:

I've taught in the past, and this is a tough one for people to navigate because as youths, everyone is overly aware to use I as in "Amanda and I went to town".

I always remind people to take the other(s) out of the draft sentence to see if it flows. "I went to town". (I is correct here.)

"Amanda brought apples to my mom and I."  Take out mom... "Amanda brought apples to I." (I is wrong, replace with me.)

Brilliant! Thank you for sharing, I teach English as a second language and this is actually really useful.

I also noticed that people often reverse the order nowadays:   "I and Amanda went to town."

I hear it constantly both my own language and English. I was always taught it is an impolite thing to do. It annoys me a lot. 

Edited December 25, 2024 by LilyD

[Quof]

52 minutes ago, LilyD said:

I was always taught it is an impolite thing to do.

Correct.  Putting yourself last is a matter of manners, not grammar. 

[Denize]

I was taught to take the other person out of the sentence to figure out if "I" or "me" is correct in ~1963 (3rd grade) and it has always stuck with me. I always preferred rules that involved common sense rather than "tricks" involving mnemonic devices where I usually forget what one of the letters is supposed to stand for (usually the letter that was a stretch just to spell a word). 

I think people choose "I" because they think it sounds more erudite than talking about mememememe - but not when used incorrectly!

Edited December 25, 2024 by Denize

[Orcinus orca]

7 hours ago, LilyD said:

I also noticed that people often reverse the order nowadays:   "I and Amanda went to town."

The one that drives me bonkers is "Myself and Amanda went to town."  First of all, it is grammatically incorrect.  Second, it's rude.   And third, it just sounds pretentious - and stupid.

[Denize]

18 minutes ago, Orcinus orca said:

The one that drives me bonkers is "Myself and Amanda went to town."  First of all, it is grammatically incorrect.  Second, it's rude.   And third, it just sounds pretentious - and stupid.

That drives me bonkers too.  And people who say such things usually do it with a pretentious look on their face.  And they also tend to use "myself" as the object of someone else's action.  "Sheila sent a letter to Amanda and myself". No! Whereas "I cut myself" is a grammatically correct way of conveying that "I'm a klutz at slicing turkey".

We spent the summer with cousins who said "ain't", like Opie Taylor and others on the Andy Griffith show and when my little brother corrected them they said "our teacher always says ain't".  I suspected that she probably did.

Edited December 25, 2024 by Denize

[Orcinus orca]

25 minutes ago, Denize said:

We spent the summer with cousins who said "ain't", like Opie Taylor and others on the Andy Griffith show and when my little brother corrected them they said "our teacher always says ain't".  I suspected that she probably did.

The past tense of "see" is "saw". But where I live, apparently even the teachers teach it as "seen" because EVERYBODY says it. 

"Did you see the eagle?"  "Yes, I seen it yesterday and my sister seen it the day before".  Arrrgggghhhhhh!

[Quof]

It's Middle Management Myself; if i have more syllables, I must be more important.

[Quof]

1 hour ago, Denize said:

And they also tend to use "myself" as the object of someone else's action. 

An easy rule - "self" is reflexive, it reflects back on something earlier in the sentence.  "I did it myself", "He went himself".  If it is the first time the character is appearing in the sentence, they can't be a "self". 

[RoxiP]

On 12/20/2024 at 9:32 PM, Chalby said:

I've taught in the past, and this is a tough one for people to navigate because as youths, everyone is overly aware to use I as in "Amanda and I went to town".

I always remind people to take the other(s) out of the draft sentence to see if it flows. "I went to town". (I is correct here.)

"Amanda brought apples to my mom and I."  Take out mom... "Amanda brought apples to I." (I is wrong, replace with me.)

I still sometimes do that - as a legal secretary grammar is very important to me (not to mention my mom was a schoolteacher) but there are times that I have to literally think out the sentence in my head...and I still haven't quite gotten down affect/effect.

Recently I've noticed an uptick in the use of "a" in front of a vowel...a apple, a upset stomach - it drives me crazy!  (My mother also disliked the word ain't and we were not allowed to use it at all!)

Edited December 26, 2024 by RoxiP

[Denize]

14 hours ago, RoxiP said:

(My mother also disliked the word ain't and we were not allowed to use it at all!)

We only were allowed to use it when imitating something Lord Peter Wimsey said in the PBS series.  We avoided doing that if the people around us did not seem to be the type to watch Lord Peter Wimsey lest we be deemed uneducated. So it was mainly my sister & me alone using "ain't" with our noses in the air ... and a sniff.

[RoxiP]

9 hours ago, Denize said:

We only were allowed to use it when imitating something Lord Peter Wimsey said in the PBS series.  We avoided doing that if the people around us did not seem to be the type to watch Lord Peter Wimsey lest we be deemed uneducated. So it was mainly my sister & me alone using "ain't" with our noses in the air ... and a sniff.

it's all about the sniff...LOL!

[BAForever]

On 12/25/2024 at 1:15 PM, Denize said:

We spent the summer with cousins who said "ain't", like Opie Taylor and others on the Andy Griffith show and when my little brother corrected them they said "our teacher always says ain't".  I suspected that she probably did.

I remember the phrase "Ain't 'aint' in the dictionary" from years ago. I still use it with my students. I do think some of it is regional. When I lived in Wisconsin, I can't recall hearing the word ain't. Fast forward to Oklahoma, it's more prevalent. 

[Elizzikra]

1 hour ago, BAForever said:

I remember the phrase "Ain't 'aint' in the dictionary" from years ago. I still use it with my students. I do think some of it is regional. When I lived in Wisconsin, I can't recall hearing the word ain't. Fast forward to Oklahoma, it's more prevalent. 

My relatives from southern Virginia and North Carolina say it constantly. It also sometimes becomes “hain’t.”

[Chalby]

On 12/26/2024 at 6:21 AM, RoxiP said:

Recently I've noticed an uptick in the use of "a" in front of a vowel...a apple, a upset stomach - it drives me crazy!  (My mother also disliked the word ain't and we were not allowed to use it at all!)

Yes! To everything you wrote. Your mother and my mother could have been sisters. And I see nothing wrong in what they passed down to us.

3 hours ago, BAForever said:

I remember the phrase "Ain't 'aint' in the dictionary" from years ago. I still use it with my students. I do think some of it is regional. When I lived in Wisconsin, I can't recall hearing the word ain't. Fast forward to Oklahoma, it's more prevalent. 

I have always used a dictionary from 1910 when I taught because it came in handy to explain the proper definition of certain words (ie: [homophobic epithet]). It would always surprise me when people would take words that were used in everyday language and make them insults.

Ain't is in my dictionary as the contraction for "am not" but even in 1910 it said it was never considered proper usage.

[Chalby]

On 12/25/2024 at 11:43 AM, Orcinus orca said:

The past tense of "see" is "saw". But where I live, apparently even the teachers teach it as "seen" because EVERYBODY says it. 

"Did you see the eagle?"  "Yes, I seen it yesterday and my sister seen it the day before".  Arrrgggghhhhhh!

As a teacher, this kills me. Yes, the word "seen" can be used but if it's attached to a subject it needs the helper 'have' or 'had'. 

But in the sentence you supplied, "aaargh" is right! They should have used saw or had seen.

On 12/25/2024 at 11:01 AM, Orcinus orca said:

The one that drives me bonkers is "Myself and Amanda went to town."  First of all, it is grammatically incorrect.

Exactly! If they took out Amanda, no one says "Myself went to town". That's when they'd be able to see it should be "Amanda and I", or "I and Amanda" but that is awkward as it sounds like an afterthought.

[Denize]

In the olden days, when a paper quoted someone saying "I seen an eagle yesterday", it would be written "I seen (sic) an eagle yesterday" or "Citizen X said that he had seen an eagle yesterday".  But nobody knows Latin anymore.

[General Days]

Happy New Year, my friends, May 2025 be better even than we hope.

[Yeah No]

On 12/30/2024 at 8:36 PM, Denize said:

In the olden days, when a paper quoted someone saying "I seen an eagle yesterday", it would be written "I seen (sic) an eagle yesterday" or "Citizen X said that he had seen an eagle yesterday".  But nobody knows Latin anymore.

Yup. They barely know English let alone Latin. 😏

10 hours ago, General Days said:

Happy New Year, my friends, May 2025 be better even than we hope.

Or fear, depending on your mood, lol. 🤯

[Gramto6]

[General Days]

20 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Yup. They barely know English let alone Latin. 😏

Or fear, depending on your mood, lol. 🤯

 

I've utterly rejected reality. 

[RoxiP]

Yes to all of the above!  I realize I'm getting old (66) but the degradation of our use of language is sad.  I work in a field where words are important (assistant to attorneys) and even some of our attorneys no longer have proper word usage.

[Yeah No]

16 hours ago, RoxiP said:

Yes to all of the above!  I realize I'm getting old (66) but the degradation of our use of language is sad.  I work in a field where words are important (assistant to attorneys) and even some of our attorneys no longer have proper word usage.

I'm your age and I'm seeing this too. One of my best male friends is a lawyer and he was always one of the only people I knew that could send me running for the dictionary but now I even catch HIM making mistakes! WHAT IS HAPPENING?  LOL 

I tell him he's hanging around with his adult children too much and it's rubbing off on him.

Even 20 years ago when I worked for and with lawyers in a Fortune 100 company I was sometimes shocked at what I saw and heard. One of them pretty much ended every sentence with a question mark. When he would submit documents for a meeting with management, my boss (also a lawyer, but whose language skills were stellar) would have me rewrite them. And this guy supposedly went to a well known and respected law school. No lie.

[tearknee]

Madison means "son of Maud" and Ryan means "little king".

 

When are these women/AFABs going to name their cis baby sons Ellen or Anne?

[Twiz44]

Don’t get me started on “less” vs. “fewer”.

 

[CalicoKitty]

3 hours ago, Twiz44 said:

Don’t get me started on “less” vs. “fewer”.

 

This is one of my pet peeves.  I find myself correcting the ads on TV or people on the radio when I hear "less"when it should be "fewer". Why is this so hard to understand?

[Orcinus orca]

13 minutes ago, CalicoKitty said:

Why is this so hard to understand?

Because people basically don't care, were never taught correctly, or are too lazy to look it up. A sad decline for sure.  

I am older than dirt and I figure I can send coded messages to everyone of my age in nursing homes.  Since they no longer teach cursive, we don't even need anything fancy, the youngsters won't  have a clue.

[Absolom]

Just be careful.  They still teach cursive in my grandkids' district.

[Denize]

I don't "eat healthy", I eat healthily or healthfully

[Yeah No]

Meri and her "mine and Kody's relationship". 🙄 It's like chalk on a blackboard every time I hear it. 

[CalicoKitty]

You can put the time in you message using a real clock.  Kids today can't read an analog clock.  Only digital.  A skill I used to teach to Kindergarteners.

[precious pupp]

My daughter had a Fischer Price teaching clock.  Of course, she is over 40.  She never did like to use cursive writing, though.  

[Absolom]

3 hours ago, CalicoKitty said:

You can put the time in you message using a real clock.  Kids today can't read an analog clock.  Only digital.  A skill I used to teach to Kindergarteners.

Beware the grandparents like me who made sure the kids could tell time on all clocks.  :)  

[Yeah No]

40 minutes ago, Absolom said:

Beware the grandparents like me who made sure the kids could tell time on all clocks.  :)  

It's ridiculous that you have to teach them. It's not like analog clocks are going away permanently that soon. They still exist, even on my smart watch. Like when heat sensitive buttons came out everyone thought manual buttons and turn knobs would go away. They haven't because (shock, surprise) many people prefer them. They are more intuitive and easier to use. Analog clock faces are iconic. If nothing else, they are a design choice. Go to any home store and you'll see many of them for sale. I just don't get a lot of things these days!

This reminds me of a segment I saw on my morning news the other day about how grade school kids now are fascinated by typewriters. When interviewed about why, they all said they loved how simple and easy they were to use, plus they didn't have any distractions built in like on computers. Gotta love that.

[Yeah No]

My husband and I were talking about this clock subject and he told me about a YouTube video he saw in which college students were asked how many minutes were in a quarter of an hour. Most of them said 25 minutes, probably because they were basing a quarter on being 25% of a whole. But as all of us know, an hour is not 100 minutes, it's 60 minutes, which is something harder to visualize if not looking at an analog clock. The fact that so many young people don't know this is frankly shocking and unacceptable.

I also remembered when digital clocks and watches first came on the scene in the early 1970s and everyone ran out and got them. P.S. That was 50 years ago and yet we still have analog clocks and watches.

[Absolom]

22 hours ago, Yeah No said:

It's ridiculous that you have to teach them. It's not like analog clocks are going away permanently that soon.

They teach it in school, but it's one or two lessons only.  It's maybe a grandma thing, but we have to have something to talk to the grandkids about and the clocks are as good a subject as any and we made a game out of telling time and discussing half hours, quarter hours.  We even got into lawyer billing hours.  Both parents are lawyers so that made sense with them.

Edited January 9 by Absolom

[Orcinus orca]

Good thing seniors know about analog clocks because it is now part of the annual health care check for Medicare.  They have you draw a clock and have the hands show a particular time like 1:55.

[Absolom]

My doctor doesn't do the mini-cog as long as I'm giving the proper medical name for procedures and can rattle off medications.

[Denize]

I had to do a cognitive test after falling & hitting my head. I like symmetry so I put in the 12,6,3,9 then the intervening numbers & the doc said she'd never seen anyone do it that way, but I passed!  Another test involved decoding a page of symbols - as fast as possible for one minute. The key showed each symbol representing a different number.  I felt like I was decoding one of the Zodiac Killer's letters. Since I like True Crime and puzzles like this, I have had lots of practice and the doc again was surprised how fast I could do it.  In the future, half the analog clock test time would be devoted to teaching the patient what a clock looks like.  One guy could get the numbers in the right places but then wrote the digital time in the middle of the clock.