Episode Discussion: TFGH

[CPP83]

What I got out of today - Maurice is the ultimate baby whisperer and I just can't help myself when he has a babe in arms because he is always able to make them grin and giggle and just relax. I had to smile when she reached her bitty finger out at him to tap on his nose.

 

 

Sonny may be total shit, but Maurice has a way with kids that is just special. The way baby Avery rested her head on his shoulder while babbling away with her adorable baby talk was just too cute.

 

And I was chuckling the whole way through when he first asked her to share and then took a bite of her teething biscuit and her beautiful smile after doing so and his reaction to munching on it, it was dimples overload.

 

But that was the only part of the show that I can comment on positively.

 

Michael gives up the baby and then goes and "loses himself" in Sabrina's extra sparkly vagina...I just can't even.

 

And I still think that they have not a single iota of real chemistry, which that wretched song playing during their pillow stare-down helped not at all.

 

Though honestly what is with Ron using baby issues to get people "in the mood"? I am not comfortable with that trend at all and he just keeps doing it.

 

So much of what he's writing is stamped with a capital "D" for disgusting, imho.

 

If a raging fire suddenly broke out at the Metro Court I'd cheer because so many useless characters would perish all at once. From the SERIAL KILLER to the Nina to Morgan and Kiki. Let me just dream about that for a second...

 

Luke's so called "Exit storyline" is more like an excruciating exercise in crap-ass writing from a talentless hack. And now they're throwing Holly and Ethan into the mix?

 

Everything just seems so...awful to me right now. 

[peachmangosteen]

Everything about Michael giving Avery to Sonny, forgiving Carly, taking any of the blame for the mess onto himself was just...bad soap. 

 

OK yea I'm not watching this episode.

[ulkis]

OK yea I'm not watching this episode.

 

I have to watch it lol. 

 

I don't understand though, do you really think it was just because Ron got bored? How does one get bored? Does he have a huge story that needs Sonny and Michael on the same side?* Otherwise, it's not like Michael being cold towards Sonny actually required much writing effort.

 

*Oh God, it's gonna be Michael and Sonny v Morgan and Ava for custody, isn't it?

[TeeVee329]

Carly: You're a great big brother, just ask Joss.

 

Me (once my shock that she actually remembered Joss' name wore off): Bitch, you wouldn't be able to pick Joss out of a lineup.

I don't understand though, do you really think it was just because Ron got bored? How does one get bored?

 

I think he achieved what he really wanted - instilling Sabrina at Michael's side - and now he wants to move on to AvaDenise vs. Sonny.  And he did so in the laziest way possible. 

 

What should have, if it had to happen, been a major moment between Sonny and Michael took less than half the episode so Michael could go bang Sabrina and Sonny and Carly could go on and on about how awesome they are. 

Edited June 29, 2015 by TeeVee329

[CPP83]

It could not be more obvious that Ron got bored and swept it all under the rug as fast as he could.

 

 

 

I'm kind of surprised he held out for this long myself. So many of his so called "big story-lines" have a shelf life of just a few months. 

 

I am going to take a stab at what will come next which may just be that Sabrina winds up pregnant with Michael's kid just before she finds out she's really Sonny's daughter.  

 

 

OK yea I'm not watching this episode.

 

 

 

I can promise you that you will have missed absolutely nothing of any substance.

Edited June 29, 2015 by CPP83

[backhometome]

I couldn't even watch Michael forgive Sonny/Carly. I had to turn the channel. Just awful. 

[Oracle42]

I think he achieved what he really wanted - instilling Sabrina at Michael's side - and now he wants to move on to AvaDenise vs. Sonny. And he did so in the laziest way possible.

.

Yeah, I think the entire point of the AJ custody battle (which was easily the best thing RC has done in the past two years) was pairing up Michael with the blandly uninteresting Disney Sparkle Princess.

I get that RC needs TeCa to anchor his Nurse's Ball but that actress should be Amy Vining the rest of the year

[TeeVee329]

Oh, and now that the plot point's over, I bet Sabrina will miraculously get her job back at GH, like Dr. O would ever hire back the dust mop.

[tvgoddess]

 

Does he have a huge story that needs Sonny and Michael on the same side?

 

It's already been established that Sonny, Morgan and Michael can't all be on the same side at the same time. So when inevitably it comes out that Avery is really Morgan's, and he flips out that Sonny won't give her to him, he'll have Michael on his side while Morgan gets MWOPish again. Michael will probably be Switzerland when it comes to who gets custody, not sure he'll pick a side. He's too much of a wimp.

 

I was reading tweets about Michael and Sabrina and their love scene, and it just put me right to sleep here at work.

Edited June 29, 2015 by tvgoddess

[peachmangosteen]

I was reading tweets about Michael and Sabrina and their love scene, and it just put me right to sleep here at work.

 

They had a love scene today? Well damn, maybe I will have to watch this ep. I can just fast forward all the bad parts!

[Box305]

We're not there yet in New York and I'm kind of hoping for a special report to interrupt the show. 

 

Is that bad?

[ulkis]

I had to turn this episode all the way the fuck off between Dante and Michael. Thank goodness Patrick wasn't on because I might have thrown my TV into the cul-de-sac.

 

I don't know about the Michael stuff, but the Dante stuff wasn't bad. Although there was an anvillicious segueway later on. After Valerie leaves, Sonny in the next scene says, "you gonna do it again?"

 

Speaking of Sonny! In the previews Dante is confiding in Sonny. This is extra amusing because he said in today's episode that maybe he sucked at marriage because he was raised by a single mother. Just what kind of advice does he think he is gonna get from Sonny???? Literally anyone would be a better confidante on the subject of marital advice! Even Maxie or Morgan.

 

Also I know I'm biased but Valerie's "oh no my pasta isn't that great" "oh no you're really not a bad person" "oh no you're not that short" "oh no those gold chains weren't so bad" is starting to get more than a little irritating. It's my job to fanwank everything he does, Valerie!

 

I'm sure Dillon/Lulu were annoying as heck too but I didn't pay attention.

 

Carly: Despite our faults - haha! - we raised a wonderful son.

 

That laugh is the worst. Also, those two didn't raise shit.

 

I have no words for the sheer stupidity of Ric/Nina/Denise/Franco. Although Bryan Craig looked like he was about to crack up at the end of the show. Glad he thinks it's funny.

It's already been established that Sonny, Morgan and Michael can't all be on the same side at the same time. 

 

it's ridiculous.

 

They had a love scene today? Well damn, maybe I will have to watch this ep. I can just fast forward all the bad parts!

 

They conveniently placed it at the end for you!

Edited June 29, 2015 by ulkis

[dubbel zout]

Michael will probably be Switzerland when it comes to who gets custody, not sure he'll pick a side.

 

In this case I can't blame him. Neither Sonny nor Morgan will take good care of Avery. Sonny will immediately pawn her off to a nanny, and Morgan will ask Lauren or Denise (who will practically eat her) or Carly for help. 

 

Poor Avery. She's the real loser here.

Edited June 29, 2015 by dubbel zout

[ch1]

Poor Avery. She's the real loser here.

 

 

Pretty much.  Sonny/Carly as her parents.  A mother in a bad wig who is just as nuts and bad as her father.  Being conceived in a crypt.  A brother who went back on every reason he gave for taking her out of her father's house - even though none of those reasons have changed....this kid was screwed from the word go.

 

And even if Sonny isn't her father - next in line is ....Morgan. 

 

Question, did Michael bring up Sonny being a man of honor?  I read that online but seriously?  Did that happen?

[TeeVee329]

Sonny/Carly as her parents.  A mother in a bad wig who is just as nuts and bad as her father.  Being conceived in a crypt.  A brother who went back on every reason he gave for taking her out of her father's house - even though none of those reasons have changed.

 

Being related to Kiki.

[dubbel zout]

The cruelest cut of all.

[HeatLifer]

ulkis, I don't like how Valerie is being portrayed as innocent and Dante is all, "I know you feel this, too!!!!" Edited June 29, 2015 by HeatLifer

[ulkis]

ulkis, I don't like how Valerie is being portrayed as innocent and Dante is all, "I know you feel this, too!!!!"

 

Oh, no, nor do I, obviously, but - not that this is much better of him - I think he was saying that to get her to keep going because he wanted some distraction sex. I do think he is attracted to her but he didn't act on it before because it wasn't enough to bother him. 

 

At the end of the episode though they showed that yeah she does have feelings for him so really, she should be getting the heck out of dodge if she really wants to not cause problems, but hey, I guess you wouldn't have a soap otherwise.

 

Also I did appreciate him saying the #1 reason why he shouldn't have kissed her is because she didn't ask for it. Hooray for acknowledging consent on a show that in general is pretty wretched on the subject.

 

I think they are going so overboard to portray her as innocent so people aren't like "these two are jerks" but meh to that lol. 

 

If she and Dante actually dated, she'd probably cause Dante to be a full-blown Sonny apologist full time. "aaww, he shot you? But you can't even see the scar!" Double dates between Dante/Valerie/Michael/Sabrina would probably turn into poetry readings about how awesome Sonny is, heh.

 

I would pay 10 bucks to see a scene where Morgan confided in Dante that he couldn't stop feeling up Denise, and Dante gets all super wide-eyed and alarmed, realizing he and Morgan are having similar problems oh em gee.

Edited June 29, 2015 by ulkis

[Perkie]

I want someone to ask Ron what the rush is.  Why couldn't Michael have brought Avery over for a visit, then, after seeing her with Sonny make the decision that maybe he should return her.  How do we go from nothing to giving her back completely in such a short time?  I don't get it.  

[ulkis]

I want someone to ask Ron what the rush is.  Why couldn't Michael have brought Avery over for a visit, then, after seeing her with Sonny make the decision that maybe he should return her.  How do we go from nothing to giving her back completely in such a short time?  I don't get it.  

 

It's so Ava will get more desperate and make her next move. Michael would let her see Avery. Sonny won't.

[Lillybee]

Ava will go ballistic when she find out that Sonny has Avery.

 

At least Snarly told Michael that she was sorry for siding with Sonny over him but Sonny couldn't even say that he regretted killing AJ.

[ulkis]

Ava will go ballistic when she find out that Sonny has Avery.

 

At least Snarly told Michael that she was sorry for siding with Sonny over him but Sonny couldn't even say that he regretted killing AJ.

 

I think this is an area where Sonny can't win. If he did say that, I know I'd be calling him a liar and a hypocrite, and Michael would probably get pissed off, because he would know Sonny is lying. It was smarter of him to keep his mouth shut on the subject.

[OnceSane]

Watching Michael and Sabrina's love scene was like watching two blind virgins have sex.

[Bishop]

Question, did Michael bring up Sonny being a man of honor? I read that online but seriously? Did that happen?

Yes, but not in a positive way. He basically said don't raise her like you did me, believing you were a man of honor when you weren't.

Also Michael only forgave Carly (which I didn't like, but was inevitable I guess with RC). He's still distant with Sonny but doesn't want to spend all his time actively hating him. I guess we're lucky we got to see him hate Carly for seven months. He's still staying a Quartermaine and still calling AJ his father. My guess is that he will be politely distant with Sonny from now on, but not forgiving him.

Edited June 29, 2015 by Bishop

[ulkis]

Watching Michael and Sabrina's love scene was like watching two blind virgins have sex.

 

That description is reserved for these two

 

 

Maybe Michael and Sabrina can be two blind, um, penguins having sex? I dunno.

[TeeVee329]

My gawd Starr and Michael were boring.  Heck, all of Starr's romances were boring.

[Bishop]

My gawd Starr and Michael were boring. Heck, all of Starr's romances were boring.

Starr and Kiki were both boring. It didn't matter who they put her with.

[twoods]

They had a love scene today? Well damn, maybe I will have to watch this ep. I can just fast forward all the bad parts!

Pretty much the only reason why I will watch today. After all the Avery drama, it was ridiculous that Michael gave up on her so easily. Horrible plot and pissed me off. It was so nice to see Michael rightfully be mad at his parents. Thanks for nothing Ron.

[LeftPhalange]

I hope Ava and Franco die in a murder suicide.

 

I hope Ric double crosses Madeline and then Nina kills her. 

 

Dante feels something between Valerie and him??? Like what, nausea? Heartburn? Indigestion? Upset stomach? Diarrhea? STFU.

[dubbel zout]

Michael only forgave Carly

 

I'm sort of okay with this. It was gross that she supported Sonny, but she accepted Michael's anger about it a lot better than Sonny did. She took her lumps as much as it was possible for her to do so. She seemed to understand why Michael was mad, whereas Sonny did his usual "Why you gotta hate?" shtick.

Edited June 29, 2015 by dubbel zout

[TeeVee329]

I never saw Carly give one sincere apology to Michael and she's repeatedly insisted that AJ wasn't Michael's father.  How can he forgive her when she's not sorry?

 

 I will forever be sad he didn't buy the Metro Court out from under her.

Edited June 29, 2015 by TeeVee329

[ulkis]

I'm sort of okay with this. It was gross that she supported Sonny, but she accepted Michael's anger about it a lot better than Sonny did. She took her lumps as much as it was possible for her to do so. She seemed to understand why Michael was mad, whereas Sonny did his usual "Why you gotta hate?" shtick.

 

I think he started to get "why you gotta hate" after he took away Avery, but before that I felt like Sonny was a lot more understanding of why Michael was mad.  Carly cried and whined about how Sonny was Michael's true father, like TeeVee said.

[dubbel zout]

I forgot about all that—I was thinking more about how she tried to get Sonny to calm down about Avery and all that.

 

I'm still okay with Michael forgiving her, though, because she's only an accessory after the fact. 

 

But this:

 

I will forever be sad he didn't buy the Metro Court out from under her.

 

Sigh. Talk about a lost opportunity.

Edited June 29, 2015 by dubbel zout

[jsbt]

How long did it take Dante to actively want to jump Valerie's bones? A week? Never happen, and I'm not even a serious fan of (either) Lulu and Dante. Dante is too devoted.

[TeeVee329]

And yet, I don't feel any real sympathy for Lulu because the way the writers have her handling this whole thing is beyond stupid.

[jsbt]

I mostly feel bad for Dante and Valerie. They do have chemistry IMO, but the story is so stupid and rushed for everyone involved.

[backbiter]

I don't really remember Hayden having that much interaction with Michael. She must have though for her to be having this weird extended coma dream about him and not Jake. I wish she would wake up. *sigh*

[ulkis]

I mostly feel bad for Dante and Valerie. They do have chemistry IMO, but the story is so stupid and rushed for everyone involved.

 

She seems to have no personality beyond telling Dante how amazing he is. Hey, I totally relate, heh,  but on screen it's a little wearisome. But then, if that wasn't her personality the only other option seems to be nowadays "snarky one liners", and the show's already overloaded with that.

 

And yet, I don't feel any real sympathy for Lulu because the way the writers have her handling this whole thing is beyond stupid.

 

Her passive-aggressive "no I really hate lying to my husband" statements are as annoying as Valerie's "oh no I don't get why she's so threatened I'm only around all the time" statements. They must really be related! If Lulu feels that bad she needs to stop lying or shut up about it.

[jsbt]

I think Valerie's got moxie. I don't care! But yes, 75% of the time she is just sighing after Dante because that's all they give her.

[dubbel zout]

Her passive-aggressive "no I really hate lying to my husband" statements

 

That's one of the main things that drives me to rage blackouts. For Lulu to continue as if there's absolutely nothing she can tell Dante is just so insanely dumb. The only reason she can't is because the story won't work otherwise. GAH.

Edited June 29, 2015 by dubbel zout

[HeatLifer]

JT and the chick who plays Valerie basically have the same script. All Patrick and Valerie do is say what Dante and Sam want to hear while perfect rainbows blow out of their asses.

[ulkis]

JT and the chick who plays Valerie basically have the same script. All Patrick and Valerie do is say what Dante and Sam want to hear while perfect rainbows blow out of their asses.

 

Although I think Dante is actually listening to the compliments. At this point, I'm pretty sure whatever Patrick says goes in one of her ears and right out the other.

[fishsanwitt]

I hate this Lulu. No depth, no insight,no subtlety, no nuance. Over-sized head on a tiny body - that's it. 

 

I've been ff-ing most of the scenes - I brake for Tracy, Laura and (because I have to) Luke. Bring on Cowboy! And then get Luke gone. 

[Perkie]

 

It's so Ava will get more desperate and make her next move. Michael would let her see Avery. Sonny won't.

But again, why does that have to happen so soon.  Ava could have visited Avery one more time, just to get even deeper into the baby rabies.  Then Michael starts to soften towards Sonny, after seeing Denise, a virtual stranger, so taken by Avery.  Then visitation, then transfer than Ava versus Sonny.  A week and a half is all it would have needed to lead up.  Is there something more pressing that I need to see taking up that time?

 

 

At least Snarly told Michael that she was sorry for siding with Sonny

Yes, but I don't remember seeing Sonny in the room at the time.  It's like Carly sort of took Michael aside to tell him, like she didn't want Sonny to hear her apologize.  

 

 

How long did it take Dante to actively want to jump Valerie's bones?

I don't think he actually wanted to.  DZ's been playing it like she's his kid sister from the get go.  To me, he's hurt and upset and he figured why not jump her bones.  I think it could have been anyone, Maxie, Jordan (wasted opportunity!).  

 

 

For Lulu to continue as if there's absolutely nothing she can tell Dante is just so insanely dumb

It's ridiculous because as DZ has been playing Dante, if she'd told him the truth, he likely would have supported her going and not made a big deal out of it like Luke claimed he would.   He may have wanted to join her in a cop capacity, only because it involved Lucky, and they were once partners.  

[Francie]

She seems to have no personality beyond telling Dante how amazing he is. Hey, I totally relate, heh,  but on screen it's a little wearisome. But then, if that wasn't her personality the only other option seems to be nowadays "snarky one liners", and the show's already overloaded with that.

 

 

 

 

Her passive-aggressive "no I really hate lying to my husband" statements are as annoying as Valerie's "oh no I don't get why she's so threatened I'm only around all the time" statements. They must really be related! If Lulu feels that bad she needs to stop lying or shut up about it.

The writers are bending over backwards to make all four of them not be looked on negatively for their inevitable respective affairs.

 

It works only up to a point though.  Because no matter what, people can control their actions.  So, just like the line on a graph that always gets closer it, but never can hit zero, so it is with extramarital affairs. There is no point where you hit the line of "I could no longer avoid choosing not to have sexual contact with this person."  Yeah, you know what, you really could.  You really, really could.

 

Ron'll never get that. 

[SlovakPrincess]

Everything about Michael giving Avery to Sonny, forgiving Carly, taking any of the blame for the mess onto himself was just...bad soap. 

 

It could not be more obvious that Ron got bored and swept it all under the rug as fast as he could.

 

Booo.

 

That is some epic bullshit right there.  

 

Although, really, it's all been turned into epic bullshit at this point.  Character traits don't matter, logical motivations don't matter -- let's have the characters just do whatever the fuck whenever! Yay!

 

Putting aside what disgusting smug assholes Sonny and Carly are ... Michael can really just hand over a baby like that?  Did he not bond with her at all?  :(

[ulkis]

That is some epic bullshit right there.  

 

Although, really, it's all been turned into epic bullshit at this point.  Character traits don't matter, logical motivations don't matter -- let's have the characters just do whatever the fuck whenever! Yay!

 

Putting aside what disgusting smug assholes Sonny and Carly are ... Michael can really just hand over a baby like that?  Did he not bond with her at all?  :(

 

No, he talked about missing her later on in the episode.

[SlovakPrincess]

I hadn't noticed the kids sleeping all the time, but at least we see them occasionally, unlike little Tommy Hardy who was invisible for 20 years. Every time Gail asked Audrey where he was, Audrey would say he was in his room playing. And then one day, boom, he's a psychiatrist.

 

 

Actually (fun fact!), Tommy was occasionally allowed out of his room, but apparently only when there was another boy around he could befriend.   In 1980 or so, Tommy was a preteen hanging out with Anne Logan's annoying son Jeremy.   Then he disappeared for about 2 years, and reappeared, SORAS-ed, as a college freshman ... so that Blackie (the John Stamos character) could have a buddy.   I feel compelled to mention this mostly because of a hilarious scene in '82, wherein Blackie takes Tommy to a bar, and naive goody-two-shoes Tommy innocently flirts with a prostitute and tries to invite her to the homecoming dance.   

[dubbel zout]

Mo is so good with babies. It's such a shame that Sonny shouldn't be allowed near them. "She looks more and more like you every day." *ducks to avoid anvils that Sonny isn't Avery's father*

 

I'm looking forward to seeing Ava learn that Michael gave Avery back to Sonny.

[CPP83]

No, he talked about missing her later on in the episode.

 

 

 

But heaven forbid that he felt the "sads" over his decision so Sabrina decided to distract him with her extra sparkly, do you want sprinkles with that, pretty princess vagina.

 

I'm still surprised that a rainbow didn't shoot out and render him blind when her bra was unhooked to expose her lady lumps.