S03.E08: Daughters

[Tara Ariano]

Callie views Rita differently after meeting Rita's daughter, who has an uneasy bond with her mom. Elsewhere, Stef uncovers a new lead in the hit-and-run accident; and Brandon talks to his mothers about the tension he's sensing in their home.

[possibilities]

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Edited August 4, 2015 by possibilities

[smrou]

I don't even know what to say about this episode because I'm so freaking disgusted by the promo for next week. I think I am actually done with this show. 

[Valny]

I don't even know what to say about this episode because I'm so freaking disgusted by the promo for next week. I think I am actually done with this show. 

Re: the promo and that part.....It's like Ground Hog Day or the likes! Same old story!  Brandon and Callie  are like a cockroaches!Their drama just will never end will it!

 

When we see them getting hot and heaving in the promo, I'm going to predict they'll stop before actually having sex. Fingers crossed.

 

 

I don't remember the girls names, but why would the pony-tailed girl lie that Rita hit her?  Maybe obnoxious bleach blonde girl has something over her?

 

I kinda like Brandon blowing up at Lena and Stef.  He made some good points. Also liked Stef apologizing to him afterwards.

Edited August 4, 2015 by Valny

[KaveDweller]

I don't even know what to say about this episode because I'm so freaking disgusted by the promo for next week. I think I am actually done with this show. 

 

Just when I was giving the show the benefit of the doubt about really ending the Braillie thing we get that promo.  Maybe it's a fake out?  If not they should have just let Callie live with Robert.

[ShortyMac]

- Nice to see Jude REALLY act out and reveal some residual issues from being in foster care. He was being written too “perfectly,” like adoption was a cure-all band-aid for his traumatic past.

 

- All the awards to Teri Polo. Also, Stef/Brandon is underrated.

 

- I feel like Brooke has a vendetta against Rita. Maybe she didn’t hit Carmen on purpose, but Brooke won’t go with the truth (if that’s what happened) because she wants to get back at Rita.

 

- If Stef and Lena do end up divorcing once the kiss is revealed, I'm out. Not here for that.

 

- Callie’s automatic placement back at GU was probably illegal. Stef can’t just call Callie’s social worker and be like, “Well, Callie’s staying here.” It’s not her decision to make.

 

- Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Screw Brallie! This is convincing me more and more that Callie won't ever be adopted. They'll always find some way to keep Brallie alive.

Edited August 4, 2015 by ShortyMac

[GildedLily]

As probably the lone Brallie shipper here, that promo made me so very happy. I'm sorry, they hooked me in the pilot and I've never been able to get past it and see them as siblings. At the same time, I fear that it could turn out to be like last summers cliffhanger where they threw the Brallie fans a bone, royally aggravated other fans, promoted the sh*t out of it in promos and social media and ultimately went mostly nowhere.

I think it's time for the show to decide though if she's getting adopted and the Brallie door is foreclosed or if they're going to do an actual romance beyond stolen kisses, brooding looks and adoption melodrama. If it's the former, I'm happy to gain back a Monday hour and wish you all well in enjoying the rest of the run. That's okay. I have season 1 on iTunes when I want to see my couple. But the adoption limbo that we've been in since 1B needs to end. I feel like no fan was happy in S2. The Brallie shippers got nothing significant in the way of their relationship as they had barely any scenes (and we got nothing characters like Lou taking up time only to disappear) and those who wanted a signed and sealed adoption were annoyed as one implausible roadblock after another was created to forestall the adoption and keep Brallie shippers from jumping ship on the show (which many did anyway). The writers need to stop being scared of alienating part of the fan base because when you try to please everyone, you please no one. Resolution and Callie's story moving forward. One way or another. That's what I want from the next 2 eps.

I am curious though, after this ep with their interviews and the finale scene where he's back at GU and then the promo (assuming it's not a dream or fake out), do people still want to see them end up siblings? Can that work? Not being facetious, genuinely curious to hear the other side of this.

Edited August 4, 2015 by GildedLily

[truthaboutluv]

The writers need to stop being scared of alienating part of the fan base because when you try to please everyone, you please no one. Resolution and Callie's story moving forward. One way or another. That's what I want from the next 2 eps.

 

 

This. That's one of the (many) reasons I've mostly stopped watching the show. I don't particularly ship Brandon/Callie but I've never cared enough to be outraged or disgusted by it. But I definitely agree that the writers are screwing up their own show with the need to try to please everyone - because the reality is they can't. So just make a decision and stick with it. However this doesn't surprise me because this is exactly what I feared when I watched the Pilot of the show. 

 

As I've said, in my opinion, the Callie/Brandon romance was telegraphed from the Pilot and it wasn't the least bit subtle. And I remembered when I watched the episode, as much as I thought it was a strong Pilot, I remembered thinking that the writers had to be careful with going there with Callie and Brandon, because they were risking writing themselves into a corner. I personally was fine with Brandon and Callie never being romantic and in fact I figured the show might have pulled a "Life With Derek" type situation.

 

For anyone who watched that show, the storyline was about a couple who married each other after failed marriages and both had children from that previous marriage. Two of the children were a teenage boy and girl and the actors who had amazing chemistry, eventually developed a HUGE shipper following and the writers as well as the actors were well aware of it. The show eventually had some episodes that had a few suggestive comments and moments here and there but they never actually fully crossed line between the characters and always kept them as strictly step-siblings. 

 

I figured that the writers of The Fosters would at least, even if they were willing to eventually cross the line, just tease the idea for awhile but instead they jumped head first before the first half of the season was even over. And I knew things were going to be messy, which it has been, because of exactly what GildedLily pointed out. They want to satisfy the viewers who want to see Callie be adopted by The Fosters but at the same time, want to keep throwing bones to Brandon/Callie shippers. And that's just not going to work and instead will only keep alienating more viewers and fans. Time to make a decision and stick with it. That is why I always felt like that's exactly why the brought in the Robert storyline - sort of as an out in case they decide to not have Callie be adopted. And if so, then just get it over with. Have Callie go be with her father and be done with it. 

 

All that said, I looked at the promo and is everyone sure that's Callie Brandon is hooking up with? Yeah the hair sort of looks like her but I think it's interesting we see the hookup solely from the back. I can absolutely see this being a classic promo fake out. 

Edited August 4, 2015 by truthaboutluv

[RachelKM]

So... I may not be able hang any longer.  Brallie is some Bullshit and I have no patience for it.  Couple that with some crap about Lena and Monty and I may be done.

 

The only bright spot for me was that Callie was about text Marianna when Chloe showed up at Rita's.  I love all references to Mariallie. They have become one of my favorite relationships on the show.

[LisaM]

I really liked the Brandon blowup at Stef and Lena about adding all of the kids to the house -- and especially his talk with Stef. Long overdue and very well done. Especially liked how Stef told Brandon that, if he objected to Mike fostering AJ, he had better speak up now. Also really liked how he mentioned that all of the kids were aware that Stef and Lena were bickering and having problems.

 

Also really liked Jude's meltdown. Also long overdue and realistic. 

 

Liked learning more about Rita's life. No clue what motivated Carmen to lie about Rita hitting her (assuming that it is a lie).

 

Liked seeing Jillian Armenante from Judging Amy as the plumber. Also liked seeing her lust after Stef. As for the Stef/Lena issues, I know that they won't break up regardless of the bickering or the issues but I wish that Lena would finally come clean with the Monte kiss info. Stef may be too busy for therapy but Lena is withholding a bomb.

 

The Brallie thing is a dealbreaker for me so I really hope that TPTB don't go there. Callie is so close to having what she really wants - this family - and only turns to Brandon when she feels that all hope of that is lost. I understand why she felt the need to unburden herself by telling her story - complete with names and details - on her new app but calling out the judge by name who is going to rule on her adoption - not smart. The preview for next week really has me pissed off; hoping that it is a giant fakeout.

[ShadowFacts]

 

All that said, I looked at the promo and is everyone sure that's Callie Brandon is hooking up with? Yeah the hair sort of looks like her but I think it's interesting we see the hookup solely from the back. I can absolutely see this being a classic promo fake out.

 

I'm thinking fakeout of the dream variety.  They've shown Callie to want the family more than Brandon, and I hope they stick with that.  Though she is typically still not making the most measured decisions--naming names on the app before her adoption is final.

 

I liked most everything about the Brandon-Stef interactions, except one thing:  Stef is now tuned into Brandon's feelings and has had her eyes opened to his discomfort in the AJ situation, and is now willing to back him up if he doesn't want Mike to foster AJ.  That sort of throws AJ under the bus and I'm not crazy about it.  Would Brandon be objecting if, say, AJ and Callie couldn't stand each other or were totally neutral towards each other?  Brandon doesn't even live with Mike, and if his jealousy causes AJ to be turned back into the system, ugh.

[truthaboutluv]

Would Brandon be objecting if, say, AJ and Callie couldn't stand each other or were totally neutral towards each other?

 

 

I don't think it's fair to make Brandon's feelings about Mike fostering AJ solely about whatever's going on with AJ and Callie. The show has been fairly consistent I think with regards to Brandon and Mike's complicated history and relationship. The reason Brandon first started down that horrible path of bad decision after bad decision in the second season, was because he one, tried to bribe Anna so she wouldn't lie about Mike and make him lose his job and two, his later trying to hide from Stef that Mike was drinking again because of how Stef would react.

 

I think Brandon is genuinely very protective of Mike despite the issues in their relationship from Mike's alcoholism. There is also a natural tendency in my opinion to feel territorial about his father and I also think it would be upsetting and create some jealousy on his part to see Mike getting along great with AJ, considering all the bad memories he has because of Mike's drinking. So naturally there will be some resentment that this kid gets to come in and get the best version of his dad.

 

Coupled with that, is the fact that we have gotten some small hints and evidence throughout the series that Brandon isn't always gung ho/happy-happy about the how many kids his parents foster and adopt. And I know some who already hate the character may hate him even more for that but I actually think it's realistic and honest.  So considering all that, I think it's very believable and not so surprising he's not exactly enthused about Mike fostering AJ. 

 

Callie is so close to having what she really wants - this family - and only turns to Brandon when she feels that all hope of that is lost. I understand why she felt the need to unburden herself by telling her story - complete with names and details - on her new app but calling out the judge by name who is going to rule on her adoption - not smart.

 

 

With regards to the bolded, this is exactly why I can't help going back to Rita's comment in S2, that Callie is self-destructive. She says she wants to be a part of the Fosters, she certainly gives that impression at times but then things like above, or even making out with Brandon in S1 right after being told by Stef and Lena that they wanted to adopt her and Jude makes me question that. It's like on some level maybe she is trying to sabotage things. I don't think it's to be with Brandon but it's almost like she feels comfortable in the victim role - the "woe is me, I'll never be adopted". If she gets everything she wants, what will she have to be unhappy about?

Edited August 4, 2015 by truthaboutluv

[Bobcatkitten]

My only hope is the preview scene is a flashback or something. Cause if it happens that will be it for me. 

[Primetimer]

Al Lowe ranks the most shocking moments of this week's The Fosters.

Read the story

[Qoass]

Okay, I'll admit I don't watch this show but damn, Rosie O'Donnell looks so slim in that picture!

[smrou]

I don't actually think divorce is at all likely with Stef and Lena. Yes, they're having relationship problems, but I think they're pretty far from that point. I mean, if Lena actually does start an affair with Monte then I'd retract that, but I also don't think that's likely. Even if their relationship were in worse shape than it currently is I just don't think the writers would go that far since they are so much the center and heart of the show. I suspect what will happen is that Stef will pick up on the intimacy that seems to have developed between Lena and Monte, suspect there might be an affair, and that will shock her into realizing they really do have problems in their marriage that need to be prioritized and worked on now. Because the whole issue lately has been that Lena recognizes their problems and Stef kinda sorta agrees but is willing to put them on the back burner all the time. 

 

I don't know what is going on with the Rita/Carmen/Brooke situation. The idea that Rita actually punched Carmen in the face seems so outlandish, and Rita a)was the person who said they had to call the police (if it was her I'd think she'd be more likely to try to sweep it under the rug rather than get authorities involved) and b)denied it so fiercely. So that makes me think Carmen and Brooke are lying. But if so, I can't imagine why when Carmen made such a point earlier about how much Rita had helped her. I dunno. It's just weird. 

 

And I genuinely don't know if I can stomach to watch next week to see what happens with these storylines. I'll probably wait and read what people say here before I watch. 

[grannygeek]

As Vera, the prostitute rescued from the orgy by Ani, points out, in the world of True Detective, “everything’s fucking”

 

Also in the world of The Fosters. But especially with regard to Brandon "Dead Eyes" Foster and sad self-destructive Callie.

Also Marianna and Mat and Wyatt. Jesus and anything female that moves. Jude and Connor. Lena and Monte.

As I've said before on this forum, this series has so many good stories to tell but ultimately everything devolves to the fuckie-fuckie.

Guess because the network suits keep sending notes over, believing that their target audience is composed of mindless twits with their attention focused only between their legs.

[AmeliaBedelia]

I have some mixed feelings, but overall, I did like this episode.

 

Rita/Rosie is always a welcome addition to the show for me. The actress playing her daughter kinda sucked, but I felt terrible for Rita all the same.

 

Jude's voice is cracking and he grew a foot! I watched a few eps from season one a couple days ago, and I miss baby Jude a little bit.

 

The interview with Brandon/Callie was edited well. I thought it was interesting how their answers didn't quite match up. They should have gotten their stories straight like Mariana suggested. 

 

I wish I cared about the car accident investigation, but I just don't. Everyone basically came out of it unscathed. I don't want there to be a twist that AJ or his brother were involved somehow. That would be too much.

 

Stef and Lena arguing/therapy is a weak point and has soured a lot of season three for me. I hate when characters keep secrets for no reason.

 

The music game was on point for this ep. I especially liked the choices for the Stef/Brandon scene and the Brandon/Callie text thing at the end.

 

Based on previews, I do think Brandon/Callie go for it. I'm okay with it. Like others have said, the show just needs to pick a lane. A dream situation and/or leaving Callie's adoption in peril again as the cliffhanger would suck and not entice me to watch the second half of season three.

[ShadowFacts]

 

I don't think it's fair to make Brandon's feelings about Mike fostering AJ solely about whatever's going on with AJ and Callie. The show has been fairly consistent I think with regards to Brandon and Mike's complicated history and relationship. The reason Brandon first started down that horrible path of bad decision after bad decision in the second season, was because he one, tried to bribe Anna so she wouldn't lie about Mike and make him lose his job and two, his later trying to hide from Stef that Mike was drinking again because of how Stef would react.

 

I think Brandon is genuinely very protective of Mike despite the issues in their relationship from Mike's alcoholism. There is also a natural tendency in my opinion to feel territorial about his father and I also think it would be upsetting and create some jealousy on his part to see Mike getting along great with AJ, considering all the bad memories he has because of Mike's drinking. So naturally there will be some resentment that this kid gets to come in and get the best version of his dad.

 

Coupled with that, is the fact that we have gotten some small hints and evidence throughout the series that Brandon isn't always gung ho/happy-happy about the how many kids his parents foster and adopt. And I know some who already hate the character may hate him even more for that but I actually think it's realistic and honest.  So considering all that, I think it's very believable and not so surprising he's not exactly enthused about Mike fostering AJ.

 

I totally agree that Brandon's hostility toward AJ is multi-faceted.  But he was giving AJ the side-eye before he found him replacing his baseball, so I think Callie is at the heart of his problem with AJ.  What I really don't like, though, is that Stef's awakening toward her son's feelings is going to be at the expense of another foster kid.  She is now saying she will support Brandon if he wants to oppose Mike bringing AJ into his family, when she was the one who pretty much encouraged Mike to do it.  That's not fair to AJ.  Stef's timeline for tuning into Brandon is all wrong, in terms of the impact on a foster kid situation she helped create.  That adult behavior doesn't sit right with me. 

[LisaM]

I think that Brandon's issues with Mike fostering AJ go deeper than Callie. Brandon commented to Mike that Mike had come to the house to visit AJ more in two weeks than he visited Brandon in many months. I think that Brandon sees Mike trying to be the kind of father to AJ that he wasn't with Brandon - and Brandon is jealous of this. I also think that Brandon believes that AJ has much more in common with Mike (particularly sports) than he does.

[Al Lowe]

I meant to go back and add this to the piece: was anyone else totally grossed out and offended by the GU girls' "hilarious" jokes about how Callie should "lock her doors" at Rita's house?

[ShortyMac]

I also want to say that I don't agree with Callie in that the judge is purposely blocking her adoption. The state would have access to all files and documents involving her; they are perfectly within their rights to investigate the Callie/Brandon thing with the restraining order. Also, the judge was correct to let Robert get to know Callie as he did not knowingly abandon her and he is her biological father.

[possibilities]

Al, yes, I thought the "jokes" about Rita were obnoxious. I didn't think they were unrealistic (i.e. I believed the girls would talk that way, because I've seen it again and again in real life), but I was disappointed that the show put them in, and thought that "she dated A MAN!!" was an inadequate response. Of course, maybe they trust the audience to recognize and parse the bullshit without the show doing it for them, and maybe they wanted to foreshadow that the GU residents do have issues with Rita and like to falsely accuse her of things, so I didn't get too worked up over it, but I agree it was offensive and not anyone's finest moment.

I actually liked Brandon more this week than I usually do. Having an outburst suits him more than having him sulk. I was glad Stef started to realize she's been holding him to an unequal standard, and began to address it. I don't agree with the idea that the adults should let a kid veto what is ultimately an adult decision (i.e. whether to foster AJ or anyone else), but I think if he has issues she's right to say she'll support him in talking about it with the other parents. I think ultimately that is more to his advantage anyway. What Brandon really needs is for Mike to address their relationship, not for Mike to get AJ out of the picture so Mike can go back to not paying attention. And also, going forward, Brandon needs to be able to trust his parents, not to get rid of another kid, but to be more of a parent for him. Part of Brandon's problem is that he's been feeling obligated to BE a parent (to his drunk parent), and to now burden him with the parental decision to abandon another kid? Not fair, not going to help him in the long run, and a very bad idea. But for sure, addressing his issues would be smart.

In a way, I think Stef ignores Brandon the way she ignores Lena. She takes them for granted because she feels secure about them, she thinks they are OK and doesn't worry about losing them. I like that the show is more and more showing how Stef's decisions back fire on the family, although Lena's passivity is also starting to annoy the crap out of me, because her just withdrawing, not sharing what she should, and generally festering behind Stef's back is not any better.

I hate the promos whether they are accurate or whether they are a fake out. I think the fake out is a cheap, manipulative ploy and undermines the credibility of the show. And if it's real? I don't know which thing annoys me more, the teen part or the adult part, but either way: knock it off, show!

Did anyone see exactly what Brandon was texting, and whether he sent it or erased it? I tried, but either my eyes or my screen just aren't good enough.

I agree that Callie is wrong to accuse the judge of deliberately blocking her adoption, but I think it illustrates her way of thinking accurately, and is very in character.

Jude is less adorable now, but I can't really argue with his actions. It makes sense, even if it doesn't make me squee.

[bybrandy]

I don't know if I would come back to this show if they went there with Brallie.   However, if they are going there they might as well let me know now so I can stop watching.   It would be better for the show for them to pick a direction even if that direction was one I abhor.   

 

Seriously, there were things I wanted to talk about in this episode but I can't even because all I can remember is how much I loathed that preview.   

 

 

Love Jude, even angry, scared, lashing out Jude.   And if they do go there with Callie and Brandon I want more angry, lashing out Jude.  It might be the only thing I have left in this show.   

[ShortyMac]

Did anyone see exactly what Brandon was texting, and whether he sent it or erased it? I tried, but either my eyes or my screen just aren't good enough.

 

Yeah. He said, "I'm here. Out front. I need to talk to you." He erased it and drove away; Callie saw the Mini Cooper and looked at her phone and there were no new messages.

[Kat]

My favorite part of this episode was Jude confronting Callie - "Why do you keep doing this?"

 

Overall I found this episode very frustrating to watch. I used be very adamantly anti-Brallie, but as others have said, at this point I just need the writers of this dumb show to make a final decision about these two teenagers and their relationship.

 

 

Oh, and hey Monte? I see you being all squirrelly. I really wanted to slap that smug smile off her face when Jude yelled at Lena about her and Stef getting a divorce. I really need this woman off my television.

[ShortyMac]

I always enjoy reading these recaps. This woman was in foster care and adopted, so it's nice to have that perspective:

 

http://ficdirectory.tumblr.com/post/125864225902/the-fosters-my-thoughts-on-episode

[Ikki]

Yeah. He said, "I'm here. Out front. I need to talk to you." He erased it and drove away; Callie saw the Mini Cooper and looked at her phone and there were no new messages.

Was this pretty much the last minute? My recording cut off at the end, at the point where Jude had just walked up the stairs.

 

I'm a bit glad I didn't see the preview, since it sounds like it would just annoy me. As for whether I'll keep watching if Brallie happens, I've watched stupider (The Secret Life of the American Teenager).

[ShortyMac]

Was this pretty much the last minute? My recording cut off at the end, at the point where Jude had just walked up the stairs.

 

Yeah, it was the last scene.

[SeanBottai]

I don't know why, but the way Brandon was texting with one thumb was like the grossest thing I've seen on TV this year. And I watch a lot of gruesome shows.

[Perfect Xero]

I almost choked at Stef saying that Brandon has always done the right thing. I guess that was the dynamic before the series started, but he's made a bunch of pretty awful decisions. Also thought that his "sorry to hear that buddy" to Jude was a nice enough but kind of a basic level reaction to finding out that Jude was having a bad day, but Stef acted like he'd shown the ultimate act of human compassion.

 

I imagine that they're intentionally keeping Robert in the dark about the Brandon restraining order investigation, but it'd be nice to know.

 

Why was it taking Stef so long to watch the security camera footage? She seemed to be just letting it play at normal speed instead of fast forwarding and stopping the video each time someone walked in to the store.

 

Also, it really took Brandon to point out that if they didn't see the driver/car leaving, then the driver probably remained within the no camera area? I guess there's a reason why Stef and Mike haven't been promoted to detective ...

 

ETA: The question of who hit who should be pretty easy. I don't think that you can punch someone hard enough to leave a mark like that without doing similar damage to your own hand.

Edited August 5, 2015 by Perfect Xero

[Glade]

Jude looks a lot older then in his last episode.  But I enjoyed his story here, and especially his discussion with Rita and Callie.  I can so relate to being silenced and trying not to speak up or act out of fear of abandonment.  I'm glad if Jude can yell instead of going mute again.  Brandon's confronting Stef and her revelation about how she's been viewing/treating him was also right on.  

 

I don't really care that much about Rita being arrested, since she did assault her daughter solely based on words that she said earlier in the episode.  If that girl wants a clean record to join the military or whatever, I'd think lying to the police would not be a great idea (unless this is like a blackmail plot or something.)  Whatever.

 

So is Aj's brother the driver of the hit and run car? 

 

I agree that B/C need a definite conclusion of their relationship--nothing ambiguous. 

Edited August 5, 2015 by Glade

[Valny]

My favorite part of this episode was Jude confronting Callie - "Why do you keep doing this?"

 

So say we all Jude!

[Kat]

 

I don't know why, but the way Brandon was texting with one thumb was like the grossest thing I've seen on TV this year. And I watch a lot of gruesome shows.

Hee!!! I too found it disconcerting.

[marceline]

I'm usually unimpressed with Brandon but I was glad he finally called out Stef and Lena for the way they've taken his tolerance for granted. Think of all the things he's had to deal with: his parents divorce, alcoholic dad, his mom "becoming" a lesbian, a step mom, and now this parade of children coming through his house and life. Yet Stef and Lena seem to be almost compulsive about adding more kids by any means necessary. He was long overdue to vent.

 

The other reaction I liked was when Stef told him that if he didn't want Mike to foster AJ she would back him up. That long moment of silence followed by "Thanks" just felt right. She finally put into words what Brandon has to have been wondering and you could see he was gobsmacked by that.

 

The stuff with Rita...wow. After everything she has done for the girls in that house, to have this happen? I'm afraid this could be Rita's exit story. Not that she'll go to jail but that she'll leave when this is all cleared up because the woman is worn down.

 

Callie putting people on blast on the internet? Ugh. Anytime someone on this show does something impulsive, stupid and destructive, I'm going to start calling it pulling a Callie.

 

"Why do you keep doing this?" Jude sweetie, that's a question for the ages.

[Ikki]

Also thought that his "sorry to hear that buddy" to Jude was a nice enough but kind of a basic level reaction to finding out that Jude was having a bad day, but Stef acted like he'd shown the ultimate act of human compassion.

I thought this was kind of hilarious. I felt his platitude came off more awkward than anything, and then for Stef to respond like that... obviously it wasn't just about what he had said to Jude, but it could've used a better setup.

[Perfect Xero]

One thing I find interesting about the Rita hitting What'sHerName story is that this is the first time I can recall that the show has presented a situation where we might not be expected to take the Foster kid's word at face value about something bad/abusive that happened off screen. It's interesting that it happens in the same episode where Callie is shown calling out her abusers* on the internet and naming their names.

 

*Speaking of Callie naming her abusers, Callie lumping the judge in with Liam and the abusive foster father was way out of line, IMO. Her adoption was held up by the extreme circumstances of them finding her actual birth father, and now because of rules that she and Brandon knowingly violated. I know it's frustrating to feel like she doesn't have control of her own life, or whatever, but she should be very aware that these issues aren't coming from the judge. And naming his name while presenting a very limited story of what's happening is just irresponsible of her.

[ShadowFacts]

 

The stuff with Rita...wow. After everything she has done for the girls in that house, to have this happen? I'm afraid this could be Rita's exit story. Not that she'll go to jail but that she'll leave when this is all cleared up because the woman is worn down.

 

I think it may be time for her to take care of herself, what with hitting her daughter after a fairly mild verbal provocation, the type she would have to deal with all day long in her work.  Even if she didn't do it, (and I don't think she did, she wouldn't have immediately said we have to call the police and then totally deny it) she probably realizes she is too burned out and reactive and needs to remove herself from possibly getting physical with one of the girls. 

[possibilities]

The question of who hit who should be pretty easy. I don't think that you can punch someone hard enough to leave a mark like that without doing similar damage to your own hand.

 

I would love it if they would give a definitive answer to what happened, and I hope it comes sooner rather than later. I was glad, though, that they let it happen off-camera though, so for at least a little while viewers could consider their biases and whether or not they're well-founded.

 

 

On the one hand, we know Rita, and like her, and think she wouldn't hit one of the GU residents, let alone one who she actually liked and respected. On the other hand, she did just hit her daughter. And then again, we hardly know New Girl, Blondie. And she's been seen to be sullen and a little rebellious, and to hate Carmen, so it's easy to imagine her acting out. But we have never seen her do anything violent, and she did back down and go wash dishes when told to do so, so it's not like she's actually been shown to be completely out of control, either. And then Carmen-- why would she defend her enemy and accuse her supporter? And why were the girls fighting to start with? The easy assumption is that Newbie is blackmailing Carmen. But even that goes with the discovery that Our Model Success Story is not who she appears to be, because she has something she wants to hide badly enough to frame someone who she supposedly likes and respects.

 

 

 

And also: why was it so easy to arrest Rita, and so hard to do anything about Liam, the people who were fostering Kiara, the guy who was beating Jude, the lady who locked Callie in a room, or any of the other nefarious actors in the system?

 

 

 

Leaving the story ambiguous for at least a little while forces all those questions in a way that showing what really happened would not have.

Edited August 5, 2015 by possibilities

[LeGrandElephant]

I don't even know what to say about this episode because I'm so freaking disgusted by the promo for next week. I think I am actually done with this show. 

 

 

My thought was that maybe its a different girl who just looks like Callie from the back, specifically to fake us out with the promos. 

 

When Callie was calling out the judge by name I was just thinking "stupid stupid stupid". Honestly, do we even know if the judge has done anything wrong or anything to antagonize Callie? It seemed to be the social worker who decided to delay things by investigating further, and she has a point. 

Edited August 5, 2015 by LeGrandElephant

[LeGrandElephant]

 

*Speaking of Callie naming her abusers, Callie lumping the judge in with Liam and the abusive foster father was way out of line, IMO. Her adoption was held up by the extreme circumstances of them finding her actual birth father, and now because of rules that she and Brandon knowingly violated. I know it's frustrating to feel like she doesn't have control of her own life, or whatever, but she should be very aware that these issues aren't coming from the judge. And naming his name while presenting a very limited story of what's happening is just irresponsible of her.

 

Yeah, exactly what I was thinking but said better.

 

Also, I don't think she asked Jude if he was ok with everyone at his school knowing he had been beaten by a previous foster father. 

Edited August 6, 2015 by LeGrandElephant

[SparedTurkey]

 

I'm usually unimpressed with Brandon but I was glad he finally called out Stef and Lena for the way they've taken his tolerance for granted. Think of all the things he's had to deal with: his parents divorce, alcoholic dad, his mom "becoming" a lesbian, a step mom, and now this parade of children coming through his house and life. Yet Stef and Lena seem to be almost compulsive about adding more kids by any means necessary. He was long overdue to vent.

But look at what Brandon has done - Continued to attempt to canoodle Callie - despite Stef talking to him about it as soon as Mariana's Quincenera episode (maybe 1X03 or 4? - I may well be wrong, but it was early in the show), to him breaking a restraining order to see Callie (which, did the audience know that S/L didn't know? if not, at least I guess S/L do know now AND it justifies them betting quite pissed about it-) and him being pissed at AJ (maybe because of Callie/the softball, but maybe/probably not - more likely because of race yes? I would be much happier and more inclined to like Brandon if it were even framed as an age thing. But it isn't so I am not).

 

Combining all that with the selling fake ID's, AND, stealing Lena's keys to the school, AND, attempting to bribe Ana, I am surprised Brandon was allowed to go on tour, let alone to Idlewyld. Let alone have a pretty awesome (and by the looks of it new) car at the end of it all. Without him even being told/considering it would even be shared with his SIBLINGS.

 

I do like the story of foster parents perhaps assuming that a biological kid would be okay with any foster kid that comes along. I also like the idea of showing that foster parents are more inclined to let foster kids get away with maladaptive behaviour. However, that doesn't seem like what the show is selling. Rather - the show/Stef /Lena have pointed out A LOT that Brandon was totally fine with Mariana and Jesus when they came to live with them. Also, while Mariana gets shamed for sex (by both, because Lena told her to not tell Callie about Wyatt), Stef offers to buy Brandon condoms. Similarly, Jesus, clearly wasn't offered condoms and the morning-after pill turned into a thing. Mariana was led by the nose by her biological mother - Brandon at all but consoled over Mike's drinking.

 

Ultimately, what the show is trying to sell I buy the reverse - Stef/Lena (and Mike) let Brandon out of a hell of a lot of bad decisions/consequences and that generosity is not extended to the other kids. Maybe if the show develops the story into Stef feeling unnessecarily guilty about recognising and embracing her lesbianism and is projecting that onto Brandon and letting him get away with bad behaviour, then if done well, okay. But at the moment, this looks like a biological white kid being told he is the victim of a cruel world and has done nothing wrong at all ever, in contrast to his adopted persons-of-colour adopted/foster siblings who have been through a lot more trauma not of their own making.

[truthaboutluv]

However, that doesn't seem like what the show is selling. Rather - the show/Stef /Lena have pointed out A LOT that Brandon was totally fine with Mariana and Jesus when they came to live with them.

 

 

Brandon was like 7 or 8 when Lena and Stef adopted Mariana and Jesus. He likely just saw them as fun playmates he got to keep and for a long time it was just the three of them. Their lives didn't change for another number of years when they brought Callie into the home, at which point Brandon was 16 already. So we're looking at 8 years or so of where it was just him, Mariana and Jesus. And in less than a year, Lena and Stef decided to adopt Callie AND her younger brother. Imagine your household jumping from three kids to five in less than a year. 

 

Also, while Mariana gets shamed for sex (by both, because Lena told her to not tell Callie about Wyatt), Stef offers to buy Brandon condoms.

 

 

Was that shaming or just wanting to avoid a very awkward family situation, considering Wyatt is Callie's ex-boyfriend or ex whatever they were. And as for Brandon and the condoms, it was my understanding in the first season that they figured out or suspected Brandon was sexually active with Talya and so rather than bury their heads in the sand, Stef decided it was better to be safe than sorry and so she started not so subtly placing condoms in the bathroom. In my opinion, that is no different than what she did with Jesus and his girlfriend, risking the anger of the girl's parents because she gave their minor kid, the morning after pill. I don't remember Stef being really angry with Jesus in finding out what happened. She was upset he'd been careless to not use protection but she didn't seem necessarily angry at the reality that he had sex. She just accepted it happened and then tried to minimize the risk of any major consequences from it. Jesus not using protection wasn't about him not being offered but him being careless in his actions. 

 

Combining all that with the selling fake ID's, AND, stealing Lena's keys to the school, AND, attempting to bribe Ana, I am surprised Brandon was allowed to go on tour, let alone to Idlewyld. Let alone have a pretty awesome (and by the looks of it new) car at the end of it all. Without him even being told/considering it would even be shared with his SIBLINGS.

 

I don't disagree that the writers had Brandon do a lot of stupid things that should have gotten him in a lot of trouble but the fact is that is not just true of him. Marianna sold drugs in the first season where one girl almost died and far as I know Stef and Lena still don't know and she never suffered any major consequences for it. Jesus also almost got seriously sick because of her, because it was his pills she was stealing. Not to mention that she tried to put it on Callie as the one selling the drugs. Then she and Jesus later got themselves into a situation with Ana that resulted in Stef being shot and Mike being investigated and almost losing his job. And I don't remember either suffering any major consequences for their action. Incidentally, that incident is what led to Brandon's bribing Ana and then later selling fake ID's to get the money back that he used to bribe Ana. And Stef did have them arrest Brandon at the dance, in front of everyone and walk him out in handcuffs. 

 

YMMV but I am definitely not seeing this "the white kid is getting away with everything and being told he is more important than the other kids.." and I'm definitely not getting the notion that Brandon's issue with AJ is race related. As noted, Lena and Stef still love and forgive Brandon for his stupid actions, because he is their kid but Stef has laid into Brandon plenty, particularly when Callie first ran away. After Brandon admitted they kissed, Stef and Lena were furious and Stef especially seemed to react like the situation was entirely his fault.

 

After all, she's the one who initiated the restraining order against him, to keep him from Callie. She's the one who basically told him get over whatever he thought he felt, because Callie was being adopted and that was it. Personally I had the unpopular opinion that that was one of the many problems in that whole situation. Stef and Lena never truly tried to deal with or address the Callie and Brandon situation - it was just "she's being adopted, she'll be your sister, get over it." And again Stef was the one who told the police officer to arrest Brandon and hand cuff him in front of his classmates. I guess my opinion is that I don't believe that we've seen favoritism from Stef and Lena towards Brandon and that they seem to love him more than the other kids.

Edited August 6, 2015 by truthaboutluv

[LeGrandElephant]

I always enjoy reading these recaps. This woman was in foster care and adopted, so it's nice to have that perspective:

 

http://ficdirectory.tumblr.com/post/125864225902/the-fosters-my-thoughts-on-episode

 

She pointed out something that had bothered me - why is Rita treating Callie like an equal friend to confide in, instead of a kid she's responsible for? 

 

I noticed that when Callie talks about this app, she always says things like foster kids have no choice where they live, no control over their lives, etc. And while that's completely true, its actually true of most kids, foster or not. Kids don't choose their parents, where they live, etc. They rarely choose anything big like where they go to school. I guess it depends on your parents, but I think many kids in our society don't get any of those choices till they're 18. Obviously there are a lot of problems that foster kids have that other kids don't, but the way she was phrasing those ones didn't quite seem to work to me. 

 

And another good point made by the girls at girls united - its an app, and most foster kids aren't going to have smartphones even if they are allowed to use the web. I hope she made it so it will work on ancient library computers. 

 

The part about helping foster kids find people they've lost touch with and find resources is great, but the part about calling out authority figures by name in videos, not so smart. The people to do that are former foster kids who are now over 18, and who can't be so easily retaliated against. 

 

Does anyone else think that half of the girls at Girls United look like they're 30?

Edited August 6, 2015 by LeGrandElephant

[SparedTurkey]

 

Brandon was like 7 or 8 when Lena and Stef adopted Mariana and Jesus.

While I find it hard to believe a 7/8 year old only would be completely fine getting 2 new siblings (sibling rivalry anyone) the show has said Brandon was completely fine with it. So him cracking it at Stef about never being asked seems to be little but an attempt to either make us feel sorry for Brandon or make him look, well, not as bad as he looked.

 

Re: Mariana and the sex - the show openly acknowledged Stef shamed her first. Plus it was pretty clear that Lena was telling Mariana to keep it quiet because of the whole Monty thing. And while they don't know about Mariana's drug debacle - they do know what Brandon has done. Lena raked Mariana over the coals over the Ana-Stef shooting thing. As far as I can tell no one said a word to Brandon after he got beat. Yes the cops took him out of the dance - but he was never charged. He hasn't had to live with the consequences of anything he has done. Except, I guess, not getting to nail Callie.

 

I just think that at the end of the day, the show has put in things, intentionally or not, that suggest Brandon does get special treatment, which made Stef's whole speech a bit....wrong. I mean - Brandon gets his own room + the one at Mike's. He assumed he wouldn't have to share his car with his siblings. There is a bit of entitlement there.

 

And maybe the animosity with AJ isn't racial. But AJ is basically the male black version of Callie - separated from brother in foster system - only Brandon has 0 compassion. And Callie nearly got Brandon shot 5 seconds after they met. As for AJ? Didn't steal from Bandon.

 

I just don't see Brandon as the specialist most wonderfullest sibling snowflake who is secretly angsty and painy because his life has been pretty traumatic and life just piles on him and Stef/Lena don't care. The show bends over backwards for him.

[Eeksquire]

 

While I find it hard to believe a 7/8 year old only would be completely fine getting 2 new siblings (sibling rivalry anyone) the show has said Brandon was completely fine with it.

Eh, I could believe that a 7/8 year old would think that siblings would be AWESOME... until they actually showed up in the house and didn't go away.  

 

I don't know what to do with this episode - I (mostly) liked all of the individual story lines, with the exception of Stef's continued Quest to Find the Hit and Run Driver, which is wildly inappropriate in so many directions I don't know what to do with it except ignore it, but I am so disappointed by the preview that I am preemptively disappointed by whatever will come next.

[possibilities]

I vigorously disagree with the idea that a kid should be asked by the parents if it's okay to bring another kid into the family. I have never heard of this being done when there's a pregnancy involved, and I think it's insane to put the child in that position, no matter how or why the kids arrive.

 

 

However, I do think that when major things happen in a kid's life, the parents should be noticing how the kid is reacting, and try to work it out if there are problems with adjustment.

 

 

I think from Brandon's perspective, he kissed Callie and got a restraining order. AJ kissed Callie and got a pass. I know that's not how we see it and it's not how the moms see it. But Brandon's still using teenage logic.

 

 

It's compounded by Mike visiting all the time to see AJ and not visiting all the time to see Brandon.

 

 

And maybe AJ returned the baseball, but he did take it and he did plan to sell it, even if he changed his mind. Brandon hasn't told anyone about that, but in his mind I'm sure that makes him "the bigger person" and "oh so tolerant" and "carrying burdens" and combined with the general feeling that he's "sacrificing" for others-- again, we see he makes choices to be a martyr or put himself in risky situations, but in his mind "it's all for others" -- teen logic again-- so that's why he's upset.

 

 

He also has the statutory rape by Dani, which for some reason no one thought he needed counseling to get over, and the beatdown that messed up his hand.

 

 

His parents think he's coping well, don't know the half of what is going on for him in general, and don't pay attention unless he acts out, by which time it's gotten to the criminal level and he's being handcuffed and so on. The fact that they don't notice all the outrageous shit he's been involved in, by itself would make most kids somewhat resentful, I think. From an outside perspective, he is getting away with stuff because of his favored status. From his perspective, his parents are too busy running after everybody else to even notice him. Again, kid logic.

 

 

I think it's partly because as adults we all see him as having had an easier life, so expect him to have fewer problems-- which is what Stef said. But from his kid perspective, he sees more attention going to the other kids, and his own problems being ignored-- and because he doesn't let anyone know there's a problem, and tries to handle it by himself, til they catch him at something, and then they're angry because they are expecting more from him than from "kids who have troubled backgrounds"... he feels like they don't appreciate how hard he's trying or the pressure he's under, which is true in a way, even if it's partly his fault for keeping things a secret.

 

 

The one time we ever saw him ask for help before getting caught, was when he felt paranoid after the pot brownie incident, and called Lena. And she was great with him, so you'd think that experience might have made him think he could go to them for help with other problems, too. But it's pretty typical for children who grew up trying to protect and take care of an alcoholic parent to have a hard time seeing their parents as reliable sources of aid, or to expect to get cared for when needed. So I guess in that way it makes sense that he doesn't get over his sulky individualism so easily. It also looks like Stef and Lena never really faced how bad the Mike situation was, and so Brandon no doubt carries around some "you never protected me, you let me visit unsupervised with a drunk person who drove me around sloshed" etc narrative. He thinks they are oblivious because they were.

 

 

Anyway, I get that he has privileged problems in some ways, but I also get that even if he didn't have it as bad as the twins with Ana, or as bad as Callie and Jude and AJ, to him his problems are still painful and real, so he wanted that to be acknowledged.

 

 

And for any parent, you really do have to attend to all your children's problems, not compare them and decide to only attend to the most severe.

Edited August 7, 2015 by possibilities

[LeGrandElephant]

I vigorously disagree with the idea that a kid should be asked by the parents if it's okay to bring another kid into the family. I have never heard of this being done when there's a pregnancy involved, and I think it's insane to put the child in that position, no matter how or why the kids arrive.

 

I this its important to make sure they're ok with it, which isn't necessarily the same as asking permission. When my little sister was going to be born, my parents did all sorts of things to make sure I wouldn't resent the new baby. It depends on the kid's age but I do think it's important to take that seriously. I also think it's reasonable to ask a kid what they think of the idea of having a new sibling, and taking that into account in how you handle the situation on various levels.

Going from a household of 3 teenagers to a household of 6 teenagers is a big deal and its not surprising there would be resentment and a feeling of instability and lack of control all around.

[ShadowFacts]

 

I vigorously disagree with the idea that a kid should be asked by the parents if it's okay to bring another kid into the family. I have never heard of this being done when there's a pregnancy involved, and I think it's insane to put the child in that position, no matter how or why the kids arrive.

 

I agree, and it's kind of an indication of privilege to think that parents would involve a kid in this decision.  In most places in the world over the last centuries, family planning hasn't been even been a thing.  Even giving appropriate amounts of attention to each child is a luxury for families struggling to survive day to day.  The fact that we can ponder these questions shows how relatively lucky we are compared to millions of others.  Every one of the Adams-Foster kids has had it rough one way or the other;  abandonment, neglect, alcohol or drug-affected parents, and more.  So what we see is them all acting out in various ways, and each one coming to terms with being in a newly-formed family, and the parents sometimes getting it right and sometimes not.  This episode showed Brandon putting his feelings out in a healthier way than usual, and Stef listening.  I like that, but I just wouldn't want AJ getting thrown under the bus.  Have a similar honest conversation with Mike. 

[marceline]

 

I vigorously disagree with the idea that a kid should be asked by the parents if it's okay to bring another kid into the family. I have never heard of this being done when there's a pregnancy involved, and I think it's insane to put the child in that position, no matter how or why the kids arrive.

 

I don't think there's a one size fits all approach to adding members to a family. Each situation is unique and should be treated as such. Brandon's life is basically defined by the upheaval around him. At this point given everything he's had to adjust to, it's just asking for trouble not to makes sure he's alright with these changes. He's not a six year old. He's well on his way to adulthood and at some point just heaping new siblings on him and expecting him to be okay with it is unrealistic. He's getting old enough that one day he could just move out and not come back. Then of course Stef and Lena would be having long tortuous conversations about "Why doesn't Brandon call or visit?" When people don't feel heard, they have two options: talk louder (see the fistfight at Callie's party) or stop talking (see Jude's mutism.)