S02.E12: Last Chance For Romance

[SaucyMommy]

I get the sense that Jess has been dating men that have given her crumbs her whole life. So they can give her just enough to show her she cares and she will stay. I don't buy that he actually cares about her. I mean he said "I care about you". And she said "that makes me feel real special".  Wow so after 5 weeks he's saying He cares about you. That's a scrap or a crumb. It's not sustaining. And he's already shown 99 red flags about why staying with him is a bad decision. But she comes off as a woman that has no self esteem and wants to be married more than actually thinking about who she is married to.

[Janet Snakehole]

This is just background noise for me at this point.

The only time I looked up and was glad I did was when Jaclyn's fluffy orange cat was shown.

[Liberty]

Oh I totally forgot:

 

Ryan D comes home with flowers for his wife who is already home.  We then see him frying, (they probably call it sauteing), dinner for his wife who likes to cook.  A couple of weeks ago he warmed up some pasta for his wife who likes to cook.

 

His culinary genius seems to have broken them out of the sushi habit.

[rulesoftravel]

Jessica is an actress.  A model and an actress.  She works as a receptionist to pay the bills when the modeling/acting

gigs are not coming.   But from an interview in 2014:

"In five years you will see (me) on your television screen as a full time successful actress, playing a lead role on a television series,” Jessica said in a 2014 interview with Wits Magazine. “Never let anyone tell you ‘you can’t’ because you can. With determination, motivation and the right support system you can do anything you put your mind to.”

 

 

There are some very cute cats on this show.  To be honest, when I first stumbled on this show, it was the cats I noticed.  It would have been a better show if the cats had been married at first sight.

Edited June 3, 2015 by rulesoftravel

[lids]

About Sean's friends, I think those were the same nerdy guys from the bachelor party.

An apartment she bought and has delayed moving into , so that she could have this "experience." It's not that easy to get out of that and the show knew it ahead of time.

I thought the apartment was still being built and that's why they couldn't move in and looked for a temporary apartment. Of course Davina said the temp apartment had to be in the same location, UES, rolls eyes.

I just don't get her with this condo thing. As a NYer, I see people rent out their condos all the time. She could even put it on Airbnb when it's done. If she really wanted to make it work with Sean, she would move, even just very temporarily. That is NOT how she rolls though. I remember in the first episode when her family was asking her not to get married at first sight and Davina was all: I don't care what they say, I'm going to do what I want. She acted like her family was oppressive. I think the reality is that she can only see things her way and has a really hard time with compromise.

I've seen people say that Devina looked shocked when Sean revealed the promotion but I was watching her face and she starts to roll her eyes even before he gets it out. She knew what he was talking about. They dissect their lives to death I'm positive Sean has made the statement: This is my five year plan (and talked about getting promoted). On top of that, in the finances episode Davina made a big deal about Sean making less than her. Of course he's going to try to prove that he's doing big things, getting promoted, nursing like a boss or whatever. Davina can not expect him to progress in his field while starting all over in the competitive environment that is Manhattan.

In general, those 2 are way to competitive to date each other. Competitive people suck at relationships...ask me how I know.

Also Sean is the type of guy who gains confidence by being complemented over and over which is NOT Davina's thing. The dismal bowling game was key. He feels emasculated and like he can't do anything right so he is preemptively sabotaging himself. Sigh, all these people need (non-televised) therapy.

[Primetimer]

The Married At First Sight couples waste their last week of 'marriage' exchanging gifts and blowing their wedding money. We're ranking them from least to most offensive.

Read the story

[trashjunkie]

I even kind of wonder how truthful Sean was about being a good bowler.  That was probably before Davina called his bluff on it and he had to actually bowl.  And yes to those "friends" being guys he paid off to come down and pose as his friends and yes to them probably being in his bowling league.

 

Considering they showed a quick shot of the scores during the 10th frame and Sean had a 77, he is definitively NOT a good bowler.

[cpcathy]

I had to tape this, as hubby was watching something else. He asks me what I'm taping, and I tell him, it's a reality show that we all hate, but we can't stop watching.

I love the advantage of being able to fast forward through Sean and Davina's baloney. (putting it nicely)

[Drogo]

Are there people out there who have actually had sex with Sean or Davina? What are these people like? Did they just cry for hours afterwards?

What a pair of unsexy individuals.

[moonxyz]

Thank God for the fast forward button. The season should have ended 3 episodes ago. Bring on the reunion already! 

Edited June 3, 2015 by moonxyz

[Crumpet]

 

Of course Davina said the temp apartment had to be in the same location, UES, rolls eyes.

 

I thought in the episode where they were looking for apartments Sean said he didn't want to get to know two neighborhoods, so he wanted the temporary place to be on the UES? 

 

Weird that he applied for the show during a time in his life where he was up for a job with a location requirement (but he still said he was willing to move) and months after his girlfriend/hook up miscarried his child. And the promotion is coming at such an interesting time! Verrrry convenient since, as others stated, he clearly doesn't want to be married.

[rulesoftravel]

I believe you are right that it was Sean who wanted the temporary apartment to be near the one Davina bought.

 

I think Sean got into this with the idea that they could sex it up for 6 weeks and then say "buhbye" to marriage, but because she had discovered how "real Italian" he is (WTF), she would remain a friend with benefits anytime he wanted to take a ride into Manhattan.   His ability to read people is lacking.  And there is no cat.  My interest dwindles if there is no cat.

Edited June 3, 2015 by rulesoftravel

[BunnySlippers]

Oh I totally forgot:

 

Ryan D comes home with flowers for his wife who is already home.  We then see him frying, (they probably call it sauteing), dinner for his wife who likes to cook.  A couple of weeks ago he warmed up some pasta for his wife who likes to cook.

 

His culinary genius seems to have broken them out of the sushi habit.

 

I noticed that, too, about the cooking. I don't think I've seen Jess cook even once on this show. Maybe they just don't show it, but why wouldn't they? I just don't get it; if she said she likes to cook, then why is she sitting on her butt at the breakfast bar while he's doing the cooking? Especially if she was home first. I've also seen him wash the dishes while she's just standing around. It's actually one of the positives I see in Ryan D; as much as a hotheaded jerk he can be, at least he's not sexist when it comes to cooking/washing up. I'm definitely not saying that Jessica should do all the housework, but it should be a shared responsibility.

 

And I was quite surprised by the flowers. I wonder if it was really his idea or the producers prompted him to do that.

 

I just don't get her with this condo thing. As a NYer, I see people rent out their condos all the time. She could even put it on Airbnb when it's done. If she really wanted to make it work with Sean, she would move, even just very temporarily. That is NOT how she rolls though. I remember in the first episode when her family was asking her not to get married at first sight and Davina was all: I don't care what they say, I'm going to do what I want. She acted like her family was oppressive. I think the reality is that she can only see things her way and has a really hard time with compromise.

I've seen people say that Devina looked shocked when Sean revealed the promotion but I was watching her face and she starts to roll her eyes even before he gets it out. She knew what he was talking about. They dissect their lives to death I'm positive Sean has made the statement: This is my five year plan (and talked about getting promoted). On top of that, in the finances episode Davina made a big deal about Sean making less than her. Of course he's going to try to prove that he's doing big things, getting promoted, nursing like a boss or whatever. Davina can not expect him to progress in his field while starting all over in the competitive environment that is Manhattan.

 

 

I don't live in NY, but I used to live in the capital city of a European country, so I actually had the same thought: why couldn't she just rent out her condo if she really wanted to make her marriage work? I think she just likes living in Manhattan and the 2 year thing is just an excuse.

 

I couldn't believe that Sean brought up the promotion and the fact that he doesn't want to move to NY during the dinner that was supposed to be a special event for the two of them.

 

And I couldn't believe that Jaclyn and Ryan R chose to do that tacky photoshoot for their special event.

 

Edited June 3, 2015 by BunnySlippers

[rulesoftravel]

I couldn't believe that to bring romance into their relationship, Sean took Davina bowling with two of his buddies.   God, how very passionate.

[mamey2422]

Considering they showed a quick shot of the scores during the 10th frame and Sean had a 77, he is definitively NOT a good bowler.

 

While I think Davina could certainly have handled the situation better and been more flexible, Sean seriously bugs me because of what a liar he comes across as. 

 

He says he's open to moving to NYC but then isn't. I understand he underestimated what moving would mean for him but I personally believe he straight up lied from the beginning. He says he's Christian Grey-level sexual but doesn't attempt any form of intimacy with Davina. He says he's a good bowler but then stinks up the joint. I imagine being in a relationship with him is like this times a hundred. Saying one thing but doing another. 

[cinsays]

   As Neurochick said - "Davina said she wouldn't move, now the show either could have told her to forget it, or found her a man in Manhattan, not matched her with someone who lived in New Jersey".  

   Did they tell Sean that he was not only agreeing to move, but it was to a specific area of the upper east side, 2 hours away from work?  I doubt it.

   Would you want your trauma nurse to be treating you if he was exhausted from a long commute every day?

    And, would you want to do it just to live with this unmovable princess?

   As for Ryan and Jessica, I just don't buy the complete turnaround from him pretty much saying he hated her and just a few days later he's buying her flowers and acting like she's the best thing that ever happened to him.  All an act, I think.  And, no, Jessica, you won't be a big star in 5 years that we will all know.

   As for Ryan and Jaclynn, I find them to be pretty much sincere and caring people. I hope they make it, if that is what they both want.  

   I also don't see why there is so much talk about how awful his teeth and his voice are when those things are not at all important in a relationship if you love someone.

[suzeecat]

I keep coming back to comparing this "experiment" to a job search.  I imagine someone unhappy at their current job going to an interview and the interviewer asks "Would you be willing to relocate?", and the job seeker thinks "gee, I really hate my current job situation.  Maybe travelling would be FUN and GLAMOROUS!"  and responds "Yes, I would be willing to relocate". Then the job seeker gets the job and gets sent to Timbuktu for six months and all they can think about is how cozy the cubicle was at their old job. 

Yeah, everything seems doable and possibly even wonderful before you actually have to DO IT.

[Jade Foxx]

So, what was that comment Jaclyn made about not letting NasalRyan eat bananas, because it's a turn off?

 

Was that a joke (?)

 

This is the only question I have after this horrid episode.

[Bubbacat]

So, what was that comment Jaclyn made about not letting NasalRyan eat bananas, because it's a turn off?

 

I could be wrong (I wasn't paying that much attention), but I thought that Jaclyn said Ryan wouldn't eat bananas in front of her -- not that she wouldn't let him. And she thought it was funny. Thus, the banana socks. I don't know. Either way, it was kind of stupid. And I actually like Jaclyn and Ryan (well . . . compared to the other two nebulous "couples," anyway).

[Drogo]

When gift-shopping for Ryan R., the correct choice is always a Neti Pot.  

[MissScarlett]

Also Sean is the type of guy who gains confidence by being complemented over and over which is NOT Davina's thing. The dismal bowling game was key. He feels emasculated and like he can't do anything right so he is preemptively sabotaging himself. Sigh, all these people need (non-televised) therapy.

 

True story!  When Davina reprimanded him for not being able to read her mind on the honeymoon, that was it for Sean.  He started to pull away and she started to push him away (being the guarded - red flag seeker that she is).  These two need to deal with their issues before getting married.  Getting married has only exacerbated their issues as individuals, which helped to further torpedo their relationship with one another.

 

I still don't believe that Sean was ever "in this for the right reasons".  YMMV of course.

 

I do think that once he saw that he and Davina were incompatible, he began to back away slowly all the while trying to soften the blow for Davina (giving her false hope, lying, refusing to be present, re-locate, etc.).  He didn't do these things in an upfront and obvious way, which is where the slime factor comes in.  As for him being accommodating and the only one to compromise -- i'm sorry but I just didn't see it.  Other than agreeing to live in their Manhattan apartment a couple of times a week (which, i'm sure the show made mandatory) -- where else has he compromised?

 

On some level, Davina knew that Sean needed a lot of nurturing and she ignored it.  He wasn't fulfilling her needs, so she definitely wasn't going to fulfill his.  She tried to communicate but he didn't care.  He was dunzo.

 

At this point, I can't blame Davina for rolling her eyes.  It's always one thing or another with Sean.  The dude needs to man up.

 

Davina needs someone who has his shit together and chases her.  Sean needs someone who can give him undivided attention and nurturing.

 

Jess & RyD are making noble last hour attempts at making their relationship good.  I was kind of bored with their segment to be honest.  I don't get warm fuzzies from this union but appreciate the attempt.

 

Jaclyn & "Waking up from anesthesia" Ryan -- they make me sad, I think.  I was so hopeful for them and and still am... but Jaclyn is definitely more guarded and Ryan is now more excited.  It doesn't appear to be very balanced but the potential is there.

 

All in all, this season has been a disappointment.

While I think Davina could certainly have handled the situation better and been more flexible, Sean seriously bugs me because of what a liar he comes across as. 

 

He says he's open to moving to NYC but then isn't. I understand he underestimated what moving would mean for him but I personally believe he straight up lied from the beginning. He says he's Christian Grey-level sexual but doesn't attempt any form of intimacy with Davina. He says he's a good bowler but then stinks up the joint. I imagine being in a relationship with him is like this times a hundred. Saying one thing but doing another. 

 

THIS!  This is exactly how I feel about him.  All talk and no action.  His actions have spoken louder than all of the words he used this season.

[BunnySlippers]

I'm curious what you all think about Ryan R seemingly trying to take away every leadership role from Jaclyn. I understand that he doesn't want to be emasculated etc. etc. but is it just me thinking that he tries to relegate her to a "Yes, Sir, you're the man, Sir" kind of position? It just seems to me like he wants a traditional kind of division of roles between them. He wants to be the leader and he wants Jaclyn to be the follower. I agree that Jaclyn shouldn't be so pushy and aggressive, but I don't think that she should be a quiet little mouse who can never, ever, take the lead in anything either. There should be some kind of equality in the relationship if it's going to work in the long run. Or is it just me thinking this way, and he's not as bad about it as I think?

[SaucyMommy]

I'm curious what you all think about Ryan R seemingly trying to take away every leadership role from Jaclyn. I understand that he doesn't want to be emasculated etc. etc. but is it just me thinking that he tries to relegate her to a "Yes, Sir, you're the man, Sir" kind of position? It just seems to me like he wants a traditional kind of division of roles between them. He wants to be the leader and he wants Jaclyn to be the follower. I agree that Jaclyn shouldn't be so pushy and aggressive, but I don't think that she should be a quiet little mouse who can never, ever, take the lead in anything either. There should be some kind of equality in the relationship if it's going to work in the long run. Or is it just me thinking this way, and he's not as bad about it as I think?

I can see that for sure. I don't understand why he cares so much if she wants to do things for him. In my marriage I for sure make more decisions than my hubby but that's just because he takes forever to decide. I don't see them working long term, and I don't know why everyone loves them. I find them boring. My husband says "How can she stand listening to him talk or even be married to him?"

[BunnySlippers]

I can see that for sure. I don't understand why he cares so much if she wants to do things for him. In my marriage I for sure make more decisions than my hubby but that's just because he takes forever to decide. I don't see them working long term, and I don't know why everyone loves them. I find them boring. My husband says "How can she stand listening to him talk or even be married to him?"

 

I'm glad I'm not the only one then! In my marriage, we discuss everything and try to come to a decision together. Sometimes it's me who makes the final decision, sometimes it's my husband (he can take forever to decide about something, too, LOL). I hope that if Jaclyn and Ryan stay together, eventually they'll develop a system at least a little bit like that; if not, I think Jaclyn should walk away and find someone who appreciates her more.

 

[Drogo]

I can't help but feel that Jaclyn was given the wrong Ryan.  I think she is exactly the type Ryan D. was looking for:  an attractive bigmouth Jewish/Italian wife from NYC who can dish it out and take it, thoroughly devoted to husband and family. Instead she got Baby Ryan.  

 

I also seem to like Ryan D. more than most, maybe because I knew quite a few like him growing up in NYC... and because I can't imagine being married to someone as passive-aggressive as Jessica.  Six weeks with her and I'd be certifiable.   

[Lnmop]

I wish I had the money they spent on makeup and manicures on the show! I'd be rich!

[Happenings12]

I do think that once he saw that he and Davina were incompatible, he began to back away slowly all the while trying to soften the blow for Davina (giving her false hope, lying, refusing to be present, re-locate, etc.).  He didn't do these things in an upfront and obvious way, which is where the slime factor comes in.  As for him being accommodating and the only one to compromise -- i'm sorry but I just didn't see it.  Other than agreeing to live in their Manhattan apartment a couple of times a week (which, i'm sure the show made mandatory) -- where else has he compromised?

 

*Stacked his shifts so he works 3 16 hour days instead of 4 12 hours to spend an extra day in Manhattan with the wife.

 

*Moved 2 hours plus away from his family.

 

*Moved 2 hours plus away from his friends. (How messed up is it that the first time they visit Sean's "life" it is to go bowling on week 6 at the "Experts" recommending? And apparently that simple act so reinvigorated Sean that Davina immediately noticed a huge change in his demeanor)

 

*Did all the commuting back and forth the whole 6 weeks. Why couldn't they spend 1 freaking night at his place in NJ and Davina commute to work? She can't even do 1 commute to make things easier on this guy over the course of 6 weeks? Really?

 

Someone mentioned Davina owned her apartment, well he owned his house in NJ. Why does her stuff trump his? I also agree with the poster who said she knew of the promotion. She wasn't shocked, she was mad he was bringing it up.

 

Anyway both are toxic together and will most likely divorce but they had huge potential if he had tried a little harder and she had tried....well at all.

 

I'm curious what you all think about Ryan R seemingly trying to take away every leadership role from Jaclyn. I understand that he doesn't want to be emasculated etc. etc. but is it just me thinking that he tries to relegate her to a "Yes, Sir, you're the man, Sir" kind of position? It just seems to me like he wants a traditional kind of division of roles between them. He wants to be the leader and he wants Jaclyn to be the follower. I agree that Jaclyn shouldn't be so pushy and aggressive, but I don't think that she should be a quiet little mouse who can never, ever, take the lead in anything either. There should be some kind of equality in the relationship if it's going to work in the long run. Or is it just me thinking this way, and he's not as bad about it as I think?

 

He's overcompensating. He doesn't want full control BUT she was so overbearing at first he reached too far. He's said he likes how she asserts herself at times he just wants to lead now and again too. What he wants is a 50/50 give and take, he just doesn't realize it fully yet. If they stay together I imagine he'll take full lead for a bit, realize that don't work either and then they will have to compromise somewhere in the middle. Maybe 50/50, 60/40...something like that.

[Drogo]

Sean, re: Davina's advantage at bowling-

"I don't have any of my equipment."

Dude.. professional bowlers would be embarrassed to say that foolishness out loud.

[BunnySlippers]

 

*Did all the commuting back and forth the whole 6 weeks. Why couldn't they spend 1 freaking night at his place in NJ and Davina commute to work? She can't even do 1 commute to make things easier on this guy over the course of 6 weeks? Really?

 

...

He's overcompensating. He doesn't want full control BUT she was so overbearing at first he reached too far. He's said he likes how she asserts herself at times he just wants to lead now and again too. What he wants is a 50/50 give and take, he just doesn't realize it fully yet. If they stay together I imagine he'll take full lead for a bit, realize that don't work either and then they will have to compromise somewhere in the middle. Maybe 50/50, 60/40...something like that.

 

I have the vague impression that in one of the early shows Davina visited Sean in NJ. Was it maybe when they celebrated Christmas together? But I agree that she could have spent some time in his house at least on some weekends.

 

I hope you're right about Ryan R. That arrangement would make for a much better marriage.

 

[Vinyasa]

Does anyone think this whole show is scripted?

 

Are the producers setting up these scenes?

[Happenings12]

I have the vague impression that in one of the early shows Davina visited Sean in NJ. Was it maybe when they celebrated Christmas together? But I agree that she could have spent some time in his house at least on some weekends.

 

Now that I think about it, I think you're right. They spent Christmas in NJ cause he had to work right before X-Mas. Was this before they got the temp apartment? I think it was. I don't think after they got the apartment she ever returned to NJ. Whatever. I'm over them. I believe that Sean got railroaded about a lot of this stuff but there is no way to verify or prove anything 1 way or the other. Meanwhile Davina and her buddy Chris are still twittering garbage, like compairing Sean to Caitlyn Jenner. So sick. So pathetic. So sad.

[LakeGal]

Why did they drag this season out with the same stuff 3 weeks in a row.  I wanted to see them have the couples meet.  It would have been alot more entertaining to me to see the 3 women have a girl's night out and the 3 men meet and hang out.  They would each get to meet 2 others going through the same experience.  I would have found that interesting.  I was so bored with them talking to the therapists and repeating the same stuff.  

[BunnySlippers]

Now that I think about it, I think you're right. They spent Christmas in NJ cause he had to work right before X-Mas. Was this before they got the temp apartment? I think it was. I don't think after they got the apartment she ever returned to NJ. Whatever. I'm over them. I believe that Sean got railroaded about a lot of this stuff but there is no way to verify or prove anything 1 way or the other. Meanwhile Davina and her buddy Chris are still twittering garbage, like compairing Sean to Caitlyn Jenner. So sick. So pathetic. So sad.

 

Yes, I think it was before they got the apartment, but I'm not sure.

 

That's awful about Davina and Chris. Sad, indeed.

[sookisooki]

OKAY, one positive about last night's show. Jaclyn making fun of rhino-challenged Ryan, "so does this pizza come with sausage- or NO? Are we going later? or NO? lol!! She's pretty funny.  OK, that's all I got....

[Bella]

Let's be careful to keep the social media stuff out of the episode thread. I just moved a post.

[Snarklepuss]

So, what was that comment Jaclyn made about not letting NasalRyan eat bananas, because it's a turn off?

 

Was that a joke (?)

 

This is the only question I have after this horrid episode.

 

The only reason I remember this is because Mr. Snarklepuss brought my attention to it because he doesn't like bananas - In the episode where Jaclyn and Ryan go grocery shopping she mentioned she didn't like bananas.  I think that's why she would consider Ryan eating bananas to be a turn off.

[Snarklepuss]

I don't understand how Davina was supposed to be so open to moving when Sean clearly was not interested in her or marriage in general, and she probably knew it.  Why take drastic measures to uproot herself for someone who has no promise?  He did the commuting because he felt forced into doing it by the show, not because he was acting in good faith.  And why shouldn't he be the one doing the commuting when he was the one who misled everyone by saying he was open to moving to a new area?  I think he did it as if to show everyone that he was not lying about being open to moving, meanwhile he was still lying, just trying to cover the lie by acting OK with moving to Manhattan.  The show probably reminded them that they would have to move in together to fulfill the contract they signed for the show.  If he really liked her he would do it voluntarily, not like it was under duress (which is what he did, IMHO).  He would also do it without acting like it was only temporary.  I seem to remember him pretty much saying he would do it temporarily in an early episode.  He would have no reason to blame her for not wanting to move because he himself didn't really want to move. 

 

I think the moving issue would have been worked out between them if Sean had any interest at all in Davina.  I think Davina would have been open to him and to possible changes in her living situation if he had shown any interest in her (or marriage in general) at all.  She mentioned a plan in which she saw herself moving to the suburbs in the future.  If he was the one she definitely WOULD have put that apartment up for rent. but yikes, I think she would have to have her head examined to do all that for a guy that could mislead her already and then put on an obvious fake act to make himself look honest. 

 

I think when he brought up the promotion, he may have already done so but not used it as an excuse to get out of the marriage.  He may have acted like it was a remote possibility as if to warn her that he may not be up for a relationship with her.  I think he possibly used the promotion as a cover for his lack of interest in her or a relationship in general.  So when he brings up the promotion as a reason the relationship can't work out, it really means he wants out of the relationship, only he's too much of a wimp to admit that it's not about the promotion at all but about his lack of interest in her.  Of course my theory is that he was not up for marriage in the first place.  He never once acted like a guy who wants marriage.  I've seen them before, I know what they look like.  I think both Ryans want marriage.  That's very obvious to me.  Whether or not they want it with the women they were matched with on this show is up in the air and TBD, but they obviously want it.  Sean acts like a slippery character who would find a way to slither out of anything at the last minute because he's a phoney baloney.

[Vicky8675309]

way too many episodes….boring

The only people I find slightly interesting are Ryan the douche (I don't think he is a douche) and Jacqueline (sp?). I wish they were paired up instead of passive aggressive Jessica and basement Ryan (waking up from anesthesia). WTF~ Jessica don't cook after bragging about cooking but Ryan ("douche") does the cooking and cleaning (and gave her both closets). Jessica's cat likes him. I think Jac's cat like basement Ryan but he annoys me more than the other Ryan and Sean (lol).

Sean and Davina are annoying together but apart I am sure they are ok and have the usual flaws that people have. I don't think Sean has a personality disorder. Davina doesn't come off well on the show or on twitter but I don't like or dislike her any more or less than I like/dislike Sean. I feel more sorry for Sean since he has people claiming to be colleagues (bullsh*t) on social media trashing him and Davina retweeting negative stuff about him. Hopefully she learns that is not wise behavior.

Edited June 4, 2015 by Vicky8675309

[rulesoftravel]

 

 

Sean, re: Davina's advantage at bowling-

"I don't have any of my equipment."

I think that's Sean's excuse for a lot of things.

[Happenings12]

I don't understand how Davina was supposed to be so open to moving when Sean clearly was not interested in her or marriage in general, and she probably knew it.  Why take drastic measures to uproot herself for someone who has no promise?  He did the commuting because he felt forced into doing it by the show, not because he was acting in good faith.  And why shouldn't he be the one doing the commuting when he was the one who misled everyone by saying he was open to moving to a new area?  I think he did it as if to show everyone that he was not lying about being open to moving, meanwhile he was still lying, just trying to cover the lie by acting OK with moving to Manhattan.  The show probably reminded them that they would have to move in together to fulfill the contract they signed for the show.  If he really liked her he would do it voluntarily, not like it was under duress (which is what he did, IMHO).  He would also do it without acting like it was only temporary.  I seem to remember him pretty much saying he would do it temporarily in an early episode.  He would have no reason to blame her for not wanting to move because he himself didn't really want to move. 

 

I think the moving issue would have been worked out between them if Sean had any interest at all in Davina.  I think Davina would have been open to him and to possible changes in her living situation if he had shown any interest in her (or marriage in general) at all.  She mentioned a plan in which she saw herself moving to the suburbs in the future.  If he was the one she definitely WOULD have put that apartment up for rent. but yikes, I think she would have to have her head examined to do all that for a guy that could mislead her already and then put on an obvious fake act to make himself look honest.

 

She knew all this on day 1? BS. You could make this argument if she was open to moving at first then got to know him and pulled back, but she didn't. She was stuck in cement from the jump. And yes he said he'd move but I doubt he considered said move would be 2+ hours away and his wife would be completely unreasonable at meeting him halfway. You are right about the temporary thing though. They only rented that apartment for the 6 weeks. Davina's plan was to move them into her real apartment and have Sean commute 4+ hours a day while working 12-16 hours. That is just insane.

 

Your premise goes both ways BTW. If she wanted the marriage to work the bare minimum she could have done was offer to at least TALK about moving closer to NJ. She wouldn't even give him lip service. She was a brick wall on the subject. She wanted a husband who would move in to her apartment giving up his entire life and basically adopting hers. She wanted a pet not a husband. Get a cat, girl. Everyone else has one. I really think living on the UES is some kind of status symbol for her she is desperately clinging to.

 

 

 

I think when he brought up the promotion, he may have already done so but not used it as an excuse to get out of the marriage.  He may have acted like it was a remote possibility as if to warn her that he may not be up for a relationship with her.

It probably was at the time. It took like 2 years to happen after all. How exactly did she act like someone who wants to be in a marriage? Name some sacrifices she made for the relationship. Hell, name 1. He moves for her and she makes the entire transition a nightmare for him. Granted he didn't handle it well at first but what stopped her from consoling him through his initial unease thus strengthening their bond? She expected an instant fairy tale husband that fell to his knees to please her every desire but wound up with a flawed person who has faults and desires of his own and she hated that. This was supposed to be about her, her, her. A husband who has his own issues. How weak (Her words.). She's way too old for that kind of nonsense. Actually forget the cat and get a dog. She's headed down the road to weird cat lady at the end of the block already. Time is not on her side.....especially, if she wants kids.

Edited June 4, 2015 by Happenings12

[mamey2422]

She knew all this on day 1? BS. You could make this argument if she was open to moving at first then got to know him and pulled back, but she didn't. She was stuck in cement from the jump./quote]

Fair or not, I think Davina made up her mind about Sean on their honeymoon on that darn sleigh ride. She saw him as weak and unavailable and, I agree, she turned into a wall which brought out Sean's bullying issues. They truly brought out the worst in each other - not a good match.

[sookisooki]

She knew all this on day 1? BS. You could make this argument if she was open to moving at first then got to know him and pulled back, but she didn't. She was stuck in cement from the jump. And yes he said he'd move but I doubt he considered said move would be 2+ hours away and his wife would be completely unreasonable at meeting him halfway. You are right about the temporary thing though. They only rented that apartment for the 6 weeks. Davina's plan was to move them into her real apartment and have Sean commute 4+ hours a day while working 12-16 hours. That is just insane.

 

Your premise goes both ways BTW. If she wanted the marriage to work the bare minimum she could have done was offer to at least TALK about moving closer to NJ. She wouldn't even give him lip service. She was a brick wall on the subject. She wanted a husband who would move in to her apartment giving up his entire life and basically adopting hers. She wanted a pet not a husband. Get a cat, girl. Everyone else has one. I really think living on the UES is some kind of status symbol for her she is desperately clinging to.

 

 

It probably was at the time. It took like 2 years to happen after all. How exactly did she act like someone who wants to be in a marriage? Name some sacrifices she made for the relationship. Hell, name 1. He moves for her and she makes the entire transition a nightmare for him. Granted he didn't handle it well at first but what stopped her from consoling him through his initial unease thus strengthening their bond? She expected an instant fairy tale husband that fell to his knees to please her every desire but wound up with a flawed person who has faults and desires of his own and she hated that. This was supposed to be about her, her, her. A husband who has his own issues. How weak (Her words.). She's way too old for that kind of nonsense. Actually forget the cat and get a dog. She's headed down the road to weird cat lady at the end of the block already. Time is not on her side.....especially, if she wants kids.

And that is what separates women from girls who live in fairy tale land in thier head.  A woman has the emotional power to seduce psychologically, physically, etc. She had an opportunity to make him 'rethink' the situation. Was it a guarantee that the marriage would stick? No. But we sure would have been looking at an entirely different relationship.

[Snarklepuss]

She knew all this on day 1? BS. You could make this argument if she was open to moving at first then got to know him and pulled back, but she didn't. She was stuck in cement from the jump. And yes he said he'd move but I doubt he considered said move would be 2+ hours away and his wife would be completely unreasonable at meeting him halfway. You are right about the temporary thing though. They only rented that apartment for the 6 weeks. Davina's plan was to move them into her real apartment and have Sean commute 4+ hours a day while working 12-16 hours. That is just insane.

 

I don't think anyone knows whether Davina really would have made changes for the right guy, but my suspicion is that she wouldn't have been such a "brick wall" if Sean had really impressed her.  My whole point was that Davina was making him put his money where his mouth was in claiming he would be OK with moving.  We don't know what Davina's living circumstances are.  Being from NY myself I've known a lot of people who live in Manhattan who don't even own cars and a few who don't even have licenses or have them but never drive.  Seriously!  In many ways living in Manhattan can be like living on a desert Island without a boat.  Either someone joins you on the Island or forget it, there's no way you can join them.  Owning a car in Manhattan is extremely expensive and difficult.   The traffic in and out of Manhattan is difficult too.  And I know all about that.  These kinds of logistics were never discussed by the show but I know they would have made a huge difference in understanding why things happened the way they did.  Davina couldn't just drop a renovation project in Manhattan to live in NJ. And she shouldn't have to - She specified that was a requirement to the show in the first place.  And forget about commuting to Manhattan from NJ on a daily basis.  That would have been next to impossible.  If she has any regular working hours she would have had to get up at 4:00 a.m. every morning.  And that's one reason why Sean only ended up doing it on his days off.  Sean even mentioned in this episode that the one day he tried commuting to NJ it took him 2 hours.  I am not surprised one bit about that timing.   I also wonder what a fortune it must have cost for him to keep his car in NY.  I can't imagine he would have parked on the street!  Finding parking on the street in Manhattan is extremely difficult.  So I don't think Davina was being so unmovable during the experiment for no reason.  I still think if Sean had acted more interested in her she might have been more willing to discuss the future with him post-apartment.

 

I am contrasting Davina and Sean to Ryan and Jaclyn.  As the two of them began to like each other more suddenly the distance difficulties seemed to work themselves out a little bit.  Ryan became less rigid about needing to be so close to his Niece on a daily basis and both of them started making noises about being willing to relocate their jobs.  Usually these logistics are worked out AFTER the couple starts to like each other more and see a future with their partner.  The problem with Sean and Davina is that things never jelled between them so of course neither of them is going to be very willing to make huge permanent changes.  Personally I don't think Sean is capable of an intimate relationship with a woman.  Davina is no prize in that way either but I think there's more hope for her than for him.  Unless he gets a mail order bride, LOL.  But I seriously don't think Sean is looking for marriage and never was.

[Snarklepuss]

It probably was at the time. It took like 2 years to happen after all. How exactly did she act like someone who wants to be in a marriage? Name some sacrifices she made for the relationship. Hell, name 1. He moves for her and she makes the entire transition a nightmare for him. Granted he didn't handle it well at first but what stopped her from consoling him through his initial unease thus strengthening their bond? She expected an instant fairy tale husband that fell to his knees to please her every desire but wound up with a flawed person who has faults and desires of his own and she hated that. This was supposed to be about her, her, her. A husband who has his own issues. How weak (Her words.). She's way too old for that kind of nonsense. Actually forget the cat and get a dog. She's headed down the road to weird cat lady at the end of the block already. Time is not on her side.....especially, if she wants kids.

 

I personally think Davina didn't act interested in a relationship with HIM.  She would have acted interested and made some sacrifices if the guy had impressed her.  I don't think Sean would have acted any differently with any other woman who was looking for marriage.  I think he would have only acted interested if the woman was a sexpot who wanted to have sex with him.  Sean acted "weak" because he was freaked out at realizing that Davina was looking for the real thing, not just a few rolls in the sack and a lark on a reality show.  I don't think he bargained for that.  And I still believe that the only reason Sean made "sacrifices" is because he was forced to put his money where his mouth was about being willing to relocate.  And still, he only did that because he knew it was temporary and because it had to happen for him to fulfill his promise to the show, not because he was on board with doing whatever he could to make the relationship work.  And I am sure that was not lost on Davina, and it only made her dislike him all the more.

[Drogo]

"That's why we're here... bowling... in New Jersey, with... you fine people." 

 

LOL, Davina.  You crack me up with your condescension. 

[CindyBee]

 

 

I am contrasting Davina and Sean to Ryan and Jaclyn.  As the two of them began to like each other more suddenly the distance difficulties seemed to work themselves out a little bit.  Ryan became less rigid about needing to be so close to his Niece on a daily basis and both of them started making noises about being willing to relocate their jobs.  Usually these logistics are worked out AFTER the couple starts to like each other more and see a future with their partner.  The problem with Sean and Davina is that things never jelled between them so of course neither of them is going to be very willing to make huge permanent changes.  Personally I don't think Sean is capable of an intimate relationship with a woman.  Davina is no prize in that way either but I think there's more hope for her than for him.  Unless he gets a mail order bride, LOL.  But I seriously don't think Sean is looking for marriage and never was.

 

I was talking to a coworker yesterday at lunch--we both watch this stupid show and like to yak about it--and she said she felt that IF Davina had actually started to fall in love or even in like with Sean, than staying so rigid on her living situation would have most probably changed.  But since they never even got to the like stage, her being open to discussing a different path became mute.  And it made for pretty craptacular TV the past few months.

 

And I agree, we do see that with Ryan & Jaclyn, as they got to know each other and started to see a future after filming ended, their previous statements of not being open to relocation became something to be reevaluated.  

[humbleopinion]

Davina's stilted comment upon meeting her bowling partners made me guffaw.

 Davina has certainly earned her success as pharm rep.

The ability to muster up that comment reflects years of glad handing.

 

Hoping that producers planted the merry widow thingee Jac was wearing in the photo shoot, too skeevy to think otherwise.

 

 

The Tiffany money clip cost Jess about 2 hundy.

Ryan got a heads up from the producers of how much was spent on his gift so he had to buy the gallon sized jug of eau de cologne for Jess.

Anybody recognize the brand by the shape and design of the Costco sized bottle?

[Happenings12]

I personally think Davina didn't act interested in a relationship with HIM.  She would have acted interested and made some sacrifices if the guy had impressed her.  I don't think Sean would have acted any differently with any other woman who was looking for marriage.  I think he would have only acted interested if the woman was a sexpot who wanted to have sex with him.  Sean acted "weak" because he was freaked out at realizing that Davina was looking for the real thing, not just a few rolls in the sack and a lark on a reality show.  I don't think he bargained for that.

 

 

I don't see where you get that from. If Sean is only in it for sex why not hit the layup he has right in front of him. He doesn't even try with Davina, to the point that some think he's a closeted gay man.

 

There are so many theories on this guy it's nuts. He's gay. No, he's axsexual. No, he's a playboy sexaholic. What the hell?

 

"That's why we're here... bowling... in New Jersey, with... you fine people." 

 

LOL, Davina.  You crack me up with your condescension. 

 

I missed that part. She really does think she's better than others, doesn't she? Oh, Davina. We've seen your crazy twitter meltdowns. You're really not.

[Snarklepuss]

I don't see where you get that from. If Sean is only in it for sex why not hit the layup he has right in front of him. He doesn't even try with Davina, to the point that some think he's a closeted gay man.

 

There are so many theories on this guy it's nuts. He's gay. No, he's axsexual. No, he's a playboy sexaholic. What the hell?

 

I left out that I also agree with the theory (not one I created) about him wanting to be on the show as a gateway to bigger, better reality show fame, such as The Bachelor.  If you want to know why people are spouting off  these theories I suggest reading the Social Media thread from start to finish because this is not the thread to discuss that.  I think people are sensing that the guy wasn't serious about the process from the get-go and are trying to create plausible reasons to explain it, such as he's gay, he's asexual, etc..  And despite all his protestations, a lot of people (including myself) aren't buying it.  If he really wanted this he would be showing more emotion to that effect.  He is so closed off and devoid of emotions that it makes him look suspicious like he's hiding something.  Even Davina's facial expressions reveal more of what she's feeling than his do.  When he coldly brought up the promotion I couldn't believe it.  Her face said to me, "Oh here we go, I can't freakin' believe you're going to use THAT as your get out of jail free card".  It felt cold and calculating to me, like he had been rehearsing it for weeks and waiting for the right moment to say it.  Her reaction also seemed to me like she half expected it all along, which is one big reason why she never invested more of herself in him.

 

I have to admit that I was once in a relationship in which the guy said one thing but acted the other.  He would throw out little red flags to sort-of clue me in that he was really not as into me as he was trying to act like he was.  Those comments were contrary to what he was saying out of the other side of his mouth.  I had to learn to read between the lines to figure out where he was really coming from.   When he dumped me, I half expected it.  I stuck out the relationship with a "wait and see" attitude but I knew deep down that he was just not that into me.  I think Davina would have had to be deaf, dumb and blind not to read the signs with Sean and be half expecting his bailing on her in the end no matter what she did.  I really can't see him as ever letting his walls down for Davina even if she sold her NY apartment and camped out in his living room in NJ.

Edited June 4, 2015 by Snarklepuss

[rulesoftravel]

I think both Davina and Sean appear to be rather unpleasant, inflexible people.   Neither of them should have been accepted for this show and they definitely should not have been matched.   It has not made for compelling TV.

 

 

Edited to add-the problem with reality tv is that we don't always grasp how unreal it all is.  Editing, editing, editing.   These people who are chosen for this show become household names (in some households).  I think the folly of that is more apparent daily.   All they did to earn this fame is agree to be on a show that pretty much makes a mockery of marriage.   That has "experts" saying things like "listen, give gifts, stop being an asshole."   And they drag family and friends into it.   I'm so guilty of watching this and thinking I have a handle on what makes these people tick.  This just in-I don't really have a clue.   

Edited June 4, 2015 by rulesoftravel