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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


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Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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I can't stand Gold Toe brand socks.

 

I know it sounds odd and maybe a little creepy, but I can't stand Gold Toe Socks.

 

I've worn Gold Toe socks once (once) and I hated how the gold thread felt on my toes.

 

Plus, it looks like whomever's wearing them has some horrible toenail fungus problem.  Probably how they were invented, by some guy how actually had toenail fungus and wanted to cover it up!


That's one, "sweetie" is another.

 

You and my mother would get along great.  She gets that all time at the drive-thrus.

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For all those who loathe being called ma'am, how about being called young lady by a male who's young enough to be your son?  I doubt very much these young men would refer to an adult male as young gentleman or young man. Maybe some day I'll get ticked off enough to say something (unless it's a waiter--that's too risky as I wouldn't want him messing around with my food!)

 

Is using the word amongst ok?  I like to use that word some times (depending on what I'm writing or saying).

 

Did anyone see a recent article on Misophonia?  According to wikipedia, it's a rarely diagnosed neuropsychiatric disorder in which negative experiences are triggered by specific sounds (whistling, slurping, sniffing, constant coughing, throat clearing, etc).  When I read the article I got a bit nervous since I have never been able to endure hearing someone whistling (my sister could torment me with that back in the day!)...it's like a paper cut going through me.  Thank goodness people don't go around whistling much any more.

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I haven't heard of Misophonia, but it does make sense. I don't know why I don't like whistling, but I really can't stand it. I will get up and leave, hopefully as politely as I can.

I think I've used the word amongst when saying something was amongst friends or amongst family. I don't know. I think I usually say among, but I bet it's like my southern accent. Oh, no, I totally don't have one...except for..every so often when I get excited. ;)

I don't really talk much on a daily basis except to my cat and sales people. I mostly write or think, so sometimes I speak differently because it comes out faster/no editing.

Edited by Betweenyouandme
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Misophonia - yeah, I celebrated a little in my head when the office manager at work resigned a couple weeks ago.   Because she WHISTLED.  Not constantly, but at random times during the day, sometimes for several minutes.  It puzzled me that I was the only one who was bothered by it, it's such a terrible sound to my ears.  The only whistling I've ever been able to stand is the theme song on the Andy Griffith show.   I guess it's  good whistling, and not screechy or forced.   But, my  husband and sons know better than to try to whistle along with it!  

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I work in retail (sigh) there are many pet peeves (just visit the break room sometime ) but the worst is the nickel & dime customers.  The "mark this down & it will help the economy" or the ones who get their way & still it isn't enough  "you marked it down to $25.00 can you go $20.00"   This is not a flea market it's a store!! Why should myself or my co-workers lose our jobs because you are cheap.  Then they 90% of time get into a car that is worth more than I make in a year.

Edited by tribeca
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That's the thing I don't miss about working in retail.  "Is there anything you can do for me?"  Um, your extra $5 savings isn't worth my job, lady. 

 

Or the people who think the only reason you work in retail is because you're too dumb to have a real job.  Oh no, no one is ever working their way through college/grad school or keeping a second job to earn some supplemental money.

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I work in retail (sigh) there are many pet peeves (just visit the break room sometime ) but the worst is the nickel & dime customers.  The "mark this down & it will help the economy" or the ones who get their way & still it isn't enough  "you marked it down to $25.00 can you go $20.00"   This is not a flea market it's a store!! Why should myself or my co-workers lose our jobs because you are cheap.  Then they 90% of time get into a car that is worth more than I make in a year.

When I was a kid, my mom would do stuff like this. I recall one time, couldn't have been more than 10. She twisted a button off a jacket, pocketed the button, then asked that the jacket be marked down because it was missing a button. I wanted to DIE. When I asked her about it that evening , she denied doing it.

I hated shopping with her. It occurred to me that my mom (and people like her) was the reason clothing manufacturers sewed extra buttons on the inside of clothes.

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The "mark this down & it will help the economy" or the ones who get their way & still it isn't enough "you marked it down to $25.00 can you go $20.00" This is not a flea market it's a store!! Why should myself or my co-workers lose our jobs because you are cheap.

I did this 1x on a whim walking past a couch & loveseat on clearance in a Department store. I asked the salesperson if I could have the set for 2/3 the clearance price, they said talk to the dept. mgr. and got her.

She agreed but said delivery would not be included at that price.

The whole thing was painless on both sides, the manager made the decision and still sold a couch & loveseat where there's more room to price cut.

So I would try it again on bigger ticket items only and ask to talk to the manager. But everyday stuff like shoes & clothes? Never. Every week there's a sale of some sort.

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So I would try it again on bigger ticket items only and ask to talk to the manager. But everyday stuff like shoes & clothes? Never. Every week there's a sale of some sort.
It's true that there's a sale of some sort, but from my point of view as the sales associate, that isn't the point.  The prices of the everyday items like shoes and clothes are non-negotiable.  There's no getting a manager to reduce the price.  So why is the customer wasting their own time by asking?  They probably feel like it can't hurt to ask, but it can change an ordinary transaction into an uncomfortable situation, because oftentimes it seems like people are trying to make you feel bad for not lowering the price.  A price you have no control over.
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I've not worked in retail but have heard tales of people asking for discounts at odd places. What bugs me is when you go to a restaurant with a "friend" that they pick or quickly agree to and then they act put off about either the menu prices or bill. They do this thing where it's like they're waiting for me to pay or they want to guilt me into splitting one meal. I get some people don't want to spend much on food, but please, bring that up before I'm sitting down and about to order. I've never just plopped someone down at a nice restaurant out of nowhere.

One time my ex best friend wanted to have a drink somewhere. I wasn't that familiar with the area but knew there was a Mexican chain restaurant nearby. I asked her about it, she had been there before, and said that would be great. She said they have a nice patio. Okay, we get there. She looks at the menu and sighs. I ask what's up. She says, the cheapest drink they have is 6$ because I don't drink beer. I said, do you want to leave? She says no because she likes the patio. Ummmm...so..... she then realizes I'm not buying her drinks and so she saddles up at brunch time to this elderly gentleman and gets him to buy her 3 margaritas, quail, and some queso. She's married.

These types of episodes are why we are no longer at all close. I'd rather we had gotten takeout from McDonalds and eaten in a park together than sit there, insulted and bored, while she ignored me as she chomped on her quail with a seventy year old, hiding her wedding ring.

Oh, yeah. And, then hearing the bragging on the way home about how she didn't have to pay a dime. Um. I'd much rather pay my bill and get to talk to my friend rather than what she did. But, no, I'm supposed to be in awe of how pretty she is. Well, sorry, but your insides are rotten.

Can you sense my hostility is still there?

Edited by Betweenyouandme
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This kind of thing happens a lot to me, and it really ruins me ever offering to pay because if I do it once to be nice, it always comes as expected. I cringe when a new friend starts talking about money problems.

I'm very sympathetic but A. my sympathy stops when I'm guilted about a 6$ drink but then the person claims their husband makes what my dad makes and also buys completely unnecessary clothes, etc 24/7 and B. when the only time we hang out is when they think I'll pay and then suddenly we stop hanging out when I no longer offer.

I don't have many friends in the first place. The last thing I want to feel is used by the few I have.

I mean, last year, I started hanging out with this girl. I paid for stuff because she really didn't make much, and I wanted to be nice. Then, she asks me for $10,000. No joke. It really, really hurt my feelings. I'd known her for two months, hung out about four times. I said I didn't feel comfortable with that in a nice way, and you guessed it, never heard from her again.

At any rate, I don't want to become stingy. But, in a friendship, it can't be 100% give. I also really dislike confrontations and awkwardness. And, it never fails to amaze me how bold some people are.

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people in the left lane driving the same speed as the people in the right lane.  The left lane is the "passing" lane.  If there is a lane to the right of you, drive faster than the people in it.

 

 

Sorry, I can't do that in my state - the cops bust you for "speeding" when you're really just passing.  They also like to nail you for not coming to a full and complete stop before turning right on red.

 

Me:

  • People who wear flip flops away from the pool/beach.  Double peeving when they wear them at school, church,  weddings, etc.

 

  • People who can't distinguish the correct spelling for "their" and "there". 

 

  • People who say, "concur" when they mean "agree".  I'd learned in a law class many years ago that concur meant to agree with an [opinion] but for a different reason than that of the other person.

 

  • People (often foreign visitors) who automatically assume that as an American, I must be stupid, ignorant, or coarse.   

 

  • People who can't be bothered to put their cellphones/iPhones away at the table.  I can't tell you how annoying it is when someone can't look up at you during the meal.  What's so darn important that you have to have your nose buried in a screen?

 

  • People who tailgate or honk at me for doing the speed limit.

 

  • When products get smaller but the price is still about the same.  I went to buy a 5lb bag of white sugar only to find 4lb bags and 10lb bags.  Why is it I get charged the same for 1 pound less of food?  Not to mention not giving me the option of a 5lb bag anymore.   

 

  • Inappropriate or sexy clothes for children.  When my neice was about 6, many of the clothes for her age and size were all about bare midriffs, asymmetrical tops and short skirts.  I had to buy some patterns and have a seamstress make some appropriate things to wear!

 

people who think the only reason you work in retail is because you're too dumb to have a real job

 

 

This.  I also once worked in retail and was looked down upon far more than I'd care to admit.  One fellow was a tourist who said to me, "I'm from Quebec.  That's in Canada."  I was so pissed I decided to have a chat with him on the current events going on in Quebec -  in French.  He shut up after that.

Edited by magicdog
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Inappropriate or sexy clothes for children.  When my neice was about 6, many of the clothes for her age and size were all about bare midriffs, asymmetrical tops and short skirts.

Yup. When your kid is young, Mommy-Daughter matching outfits may seem cute - even if it is revealing or tight.  Younger* moms often tend to dress more trendy and don't see it as an issue.  When your daughter starts to develop, Dad suddenly doesn't find trendy wear "cute" any longer on his pre-teen/teen daughter when he notices she's attracting attention.  By that time, it is too late to tell your daughter that the skimpy clothes are off-limits - especially if Mom sees nothing wrong with it.

 

*Based on my own observation of friends who got married due to pregnancy when the wife was 16 or younger.  There were several kids from the neighborhood where this was the pattern.

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My current number one is pausing the TV show you are watching on the DVR in the room with other people (even if they are only sort of paying attention) and then wandering off for 10 minutes to take a phone call, smoke a cigarette, read some texts, and so on. 

 

Look, if you need a break to do some stuff, just tell the other people you would like to pick back up on your show when you get back.  And then hit the live TV button. Freaking CSPAN would be better than just dead silence looking at a frozen image on the screen.

 

 

- Pushing the button for the elevator or crosswalk more than once

 

- Signs at the supermarket reading "15 items or less" (instead of "fewer") and people who get in those lines with 16 or more items

Heh. But pushing the button several times just feels better sometimes. Everybody knows it doesn't help. 

 

I had a lady not to long ago hit the line in front of me with 37 items. Not even remotely close to 15. I liked that I could identify her as a genuine asshole and not somebody who might have been in a hurry due to an emergency at home or somebody who just thought that 20 items looked like 15 since they all fit in the basket.

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I listen to NPR at work and my favorite midday program takes calls from listeners during the show.  Every.single.person starts their call with "Hi, how are you?".  Polite, right?  Except the hosts just said that they were fine to the caller before that.  If you were truly polite, you wouldn't have to ask because you would have been listening.

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I listen to NPR at work and my favorite midday program takes calls from listeners during the show.  Every.single.person starts their call with "Hi, how are you?".  Polite, right?  Except the hosts just said that they were fine to the caller before that.  If you were truly polite, you wouldn't have to ask because you would have been listening.

Yes. Same thing with sports radio. The caller will go on about, "Thank you for taking my call; I can't believe I made it on the air; you guys get me through my day; I love hearing your take on sports, etc." Just ask your friggin question already.

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The caller will go on about, "Thank you for taking my call; I can't believe I made it on the air; you guys get me through my day; I love hearing your take on sports, etc."

 

 

Same with my favorite talk radio shows.  I do cut them a bit of slack with the thanks offered for taking the call;  it's good manners since they often have to go through a screener first and not everyone has something relevant to bring to the discussion.  Others get a bit star struck - others get the radio version of the "deer in the headlights" and choke on air and sometimes a good host can help bring them out of it.

Edited by magicdog
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I want to poke pencils in my ears when I happen to catch a caller, almost any caller, on a radio show.  The morning radio announcer says "call and tell us about your favourite Christmas present", and gets a slew of callers who.cannot.get.to.the.point.  It's like the litigants on Judge Judy who want to tell their entire life story instead of simply answering her question.   It makes me go all Chandler Bing "Get there faster!'

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Apparently my neutral face is somewhat serious and my pet peeve is when random people tell me to smile or ask me why I look so serious. I had one guy in the checkout line say, "You look like you want to kill someone." My response was, "Not until just now." I really don't understand the need to comment on other people's expressions anyway. Even if I were in a foul mood how is making a comment helpful?

Also people I don't know very well who feel the need to touch me, piss me off. I'm glad you like my shirt there is no reason you need to touch it (or my hair when I get it cut for that matter). I am especially upset by people who do it even after I ask them to please not invade my personal space because they think it's funny that I stiffen up when touched.

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Grocery store/store pet peeves.

 

Granted, I have a disability that makes walking/balance  difficult. But I hate when parents let their kids run amok in stores (chasing each other, playing tag and hide and seek). I've nearly been knocked over on several occasions. There's no one to look to because the parents aren't even in the same aisle. Or I've seen parents playing along with their kids. Adults playing tag in a store, hiding from their kids in carousels of clothing!

 

Related: anyone seen those grocery carts with the big Fisher Price carts attached for kids to ride in? Those things take up the majority of the aisle! I'm always shirking away from them, afraid they're going to knock me over. They look hard to steer and pointless. I'm going to sound cranky, but I was raised  to think that going to the grocery store was an errand and not about your entertainment, as a kid. Honestly, those car carts would knock over even an able-bodied person!

Edited by AltLivia
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Grocery store/store pet peeves.

 

Granted, I have a disability that makes walking/balance  difficult. But I hate when parents let their kids run amok in stores (chasing each other, playing tag and hide and seek). I've nearly been knocked over on several occasions. There's no one to look to because the parents aren't even in the same aisle. Or I've seen parents playing along with their kids. Adults playing tag in a store, hiding from their kids in carousels of clothing!

 

Related: anyone seen those grocery carts with the big Fisher Price carts attached for kids to ride in? Those things take up the majority of the aisle! I'm always shirking away from them, afraid they're going to knock me over. They look hard to steer and pointless. I'm going to sound cranky, but I was raised  to think that going to the grocery store was an errand and not about your entertainment, as a kid. Honestly, those car carts would knock over even an able-bodied person!

I'll be cranky with you...The free range children are a problem. And I tried to use one of those racing cart grocery carts exatly once when my son was small - they are a nightmare to maneuver! 

 

When my kids were smaller I usually had to take them to the store with me.  Our first stop was always the bakery to get a bagel (cinnamon raisin was the bagel of choice).  My two happily munched the bagel as we went through the store as quickly as possible.  We normally got done just a few minutes after they finished so one of them would be in charge of the bagel bag and letting the cashier know about the bagels so we could pay for them.

 

One of my summer jobs was a cashier in a grocery store.  I am inordantly peeved when I see that someone has changed their mind about an item and sets it down on the closest shelf.  I even see cold items and meat randomly strewn about the store - so so inconsiderate!  If you don't take it back to the proper location, at least take it up to the cashier.  They always have other items that need to be re-shelved and it really is not a big deal.

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Sorry, I can't do that in my state - the cops bust you for "speeding" when you're really just passing. They also like to nail you for not coming to a full and complete stop before turning right on red.

Me:

  • People who wear flip flops away from the pool/beach. Double peeving when they wear them at school, church, weddings, etc.
  • People who can't distinguish the correct spelling for "their" and "there".
  • People who say, "concur" when they mean "agree". I'd learned in a law class many years ago that concur meant to agree with an [opinion] but for a different reason than that of the other person.
  • People (often foreign visitors) who automatically assume that as an American, I must be stupid, ignorant, or coarse.
  • People who can't be bothered to put their cellphones/iPhones away at the table. I can't tell you how annoying it is when someone can't look up at you during the meal. What's so darn important that you have to have your nose buried in a screen?
  • People who tailgate or honk at me for doing the speed limit.
  • When products get smaller but the price is still about the same. I went to buy a 5lb bag of white sugar only to find 4lb bags and 10lb bags. Why is it I get charged the same for 1 pound less of food? Not to mention not giving me the option of a 5lb bag anymore.
  • Inappropriate or sexy clothes for children. When my neice was about 6, many of the clothes for her age and size were all about bare midriffs, asymmetrical tops and short skirts. I had to buy some patterns and have a seamstress make some appropriate things to wear!
This. I also once worked in retail and was looked down upon far more than I'd care to admit. One fellow was a tourist who said to me, "I'm from Quebec. That's in Canada." I was so pissed I decided to have a chat with him on the current events going on in Quebec - in French. He shut up after that.
Here, here on the idiots who think only other idiots must work retail, food service or other odd jobs!!

I'm a high school teacher full-time, but I do promotional jobs at various retail/food establishments on the side because it's decent dough that supplements my teaching salary nicely.

On one of my promo jobs last summer(I was conducting surveys with customers at Cracker Barrel, which went about as well as you'd think), I had an old man actually take me aside and say, "You seem like a very intelligent young lady, so you really should consider getting an education so you don't have to do jobs like these." I got the biggest kick out of telling that old jackass, "Actually, I'm a full-time teacher who does jobs like these on the side so that I can pay off the loans from my TWO MASTERS DEGREES, but I appreciate your concern, sir."

I still have to chuckle over how dumbfounded he looked in response just before he scurried away in embarrassment.

Other pet peeves:

---MLM/Pyramid Schemes & Promo Parties:

Please don't invite me to yet another party where I'm guilted into buying your overpriced, unnecessary shit. I don't need your crappy wraps/make-up/jewelry/home goods/Scentsy/oils, etc. And I sure don't need you to "sign me up" under your suspicious "sales team" for some shady product that will only make you and your minions a few hundreds richer while this shady company makes all the buckets of money it's promised you and millions of other suckers.

---People who stare at other people:

You look like a moronic cow. Please stop it.

---Being made to feel like an idiot for not watching popular scripted TV programs:

Yes, I'm too lazy to commit to watching TV shows that involve me keeping up with intricate, detailed plots. And no, I don't want to waste my time "binge-watching" anything. Yes, just because I like to watch The Real Housewives of Wherever and other silly reality shows on my off-time doesn't mean you have the right to act superior to me and sit there judging my taste in television. And just because I don't jizz all over "Game of Thrones" or "Mad Men" or "Downton Abby" and the like doesn't mean I'm an idiot, I just like to shut off my brain and relax with goofy trash after a long workday.

---Inconsiderate drivers:

Please get off your horn, you made your point in 2 seconds! Please, please stop texting---text at a stoplight if you must! Please, PLEASE use your turn signal; how difficult is this and how lazy are you if you can't manage this?! Please get out of the left lane if you drive like Mr. Magoo. Please don't hog the entire line of traffic if you're making a turn or not making a turn; try to think about the line of traffic behind you. And if you're at a long turning light, please don't leave huge gaps between you and the next car!!!

---Nail-biters:

If I see you nibbling your nails, be assured that I will likely never want to be around you again, because I know that everything you've touched has also been exposed to your saliva and germs, and that's disgusting. I've actually broken up relationships over this, it disgusts me on such a visceral level.

---Long nails:

If women had any idea what kind of germs and bacteria linger under those long nails, they'd cut them immediately. I've worked in healthcare/seniorcare positions, so I've seen it firsthand. And once you've seen food and fecal-matter stuck under long nails, you're over them forever.

---Tans, fake/spray tans & tanning beds:

It just looks so trashy to me. Why is looking like a leather handbag or a barbecued oompa-loompa desirable? What's wrong with just learning to love your skin in its naturally pasty state??

---Botox:

I know a few gals in their early-20's already getting "preventative" injections. It just seems scary and there hasn't been enough research in its long-term effects for me to sign up for getting poison regularly shot into my skin. It's just sad to think that it's such an acceptable thing nowadays.

---People who preach their religion/politics on Facebook:

None of us cares and you're not going to convince us otherwise, so please keep your moronic views to yourself, thanks. The rest of us on FB actually like to go there to socialize and for shits and giggles, so please spare us your creepy agendas.

---Zealously Religious folks/fundies:

I don't care who or what you worship, just please leave me out of it and please don't even attempt to invite me to your church(no, your church is not "different" or "fun" to me) under the guise of pretending to genuinely befriend me.

---Vocal-fry/upspeak:

Thanks for this, Kardashians; you've now convinced young women around the US that talking like this makes them seem sexy and sophisticated, when it' makes them sound like unprofessional imbeciles. It's become this generation's version of "Valley Girl" shtick.

---Pinterest:

I waste enough time online. I don't need yet another reason in the form of an online scrapbook I force my friends to see.

Okay, enough of this pet peeves novel, sorry!

((I'm sure long-winded posts on forums are among many pet-peeves too, after all))

Edited by Sun-Bun
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I am inordantly peeved when I see that someone has changed their mind about an item and sets it down on the closest shelf.  I even see cold items and meat randomly strewn about the store - so so inconsiderate!  If you don't take it back to the proper location, at least take it up to the cashier.  They always have other items that need to be re-shelved and it really is not a big deal.

 

What annoys me most on that front is when people place an unwanted item in the magazine rack at the checkout line.  You are right there!  Just hand it to the cashier and explain you changed your mind.  The couple of times I've handed perishable items to a cashier, saying, "Someone left this here," they have done some pretty good grumbling about how often people do that and how crazy it makes them.

 

And I hate "free range children" (totally stealing that) in the grocery store, too.  I remember my mom taking me, and I either rode in the seat of the cart when I was little enough or walked along with her once I wasn't.  I knew to stay out of people's way, not pull anything off the shelves other than something she'd asked me to get, etc.  I obviously wouldn't have been paying attention then the way I do as an adult, but it seems like that was the norm -- kids running all over the damn place, lying down in the middle of the aisle ... that shit didn't happen often back in my day, and when it did, the kid got yanked back into place real quick.

Edited by Bastet
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I try and do my shopping while the kids are in preschool but sometimes I have no choice. I co sign on those big honking carts with the race cars. I used one once and that was it. I do like the idea about the bagels.

Unfortunately, my shopping experience consists of three stores. SAMs Club for the bulky items, Aldi for the canned goods, misc., and my local grocery store chain for fresh produce, misc. my kids have really upped their behavior game in the local grocery store since we discovered the Free Popcorn for kids 12 and under kiosk! I wish every store had something similar!

I try not to judge other parents in the store but yes, not actively trying to reign in your child when they are mis behaving in public causes me to be judgy. Shopping is a hassle and a chore but kids need to learn how to behave.period.

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---MLM/Pyramid Schemes & Promo Parties:

Please don't invite me to yet another party where I'm guilted into buying your overpriced, unnecessary shit. I don't need your crappy wraps/make-up/jewelry/home goods/Scentsy/oils, etc. And I sure don't need you to "sign me up" under your suspicious "sales team" for some shady product that will only make you and your minions a few hundreds richer while this shady company makes all the buckets of money it's promised you and millions of other suckers.

 

My friend started selling Mary Kay when we were in college. She'd just started, and I thought that when she showed me her wares she was just psyched about the opportunity. She didn't have a kit or anything. Wrong! It was a sales pitch. I felt so pressured that I spent 25 bucks. Turns out she quit selling shortly after that  and I never got the things that I paid for. 

 

I have another friend who sells Avon. Like, as a profession. She does so well (?)that she opened an office to work from/recruit! It's bizarre. She used to be in beauty pageants and is well known locally.

 

My mom sold (really atrocious)home goods for a time when I was in junior high.  She was always trying to sell to my friends' parents and it was clear they wanted nothing to do with it. I was so very proud of my mom for trying something new, but it was uncomfortable.

 

We do have a pizza stone(?) that my mom picked up from a Pampered Chef party. It's great. Unnecessary, but great. 

 

 

---People who stare at other people:

You look like a moronic cow. Please stop it.

Cosigned. I get stared at so much because of the way I walk. My parents always told me that "everyone stares at everyone else!" but I don't. At most, I'll give someone a polite smile of acknowledgement. *

 

* I make an exception for the parents of free-range kids.If I fall and am injured because your kid ran square into me, you'll wish I just gave you a stare.

Edited by AltLivia
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I try not to judge other parents in the store but yes, not actively trying to reign in your child when they are mis behaving in public causes me to be judgy.

 

Same here.  Even the most conscientious parent with a normally well-behaved child is going to experience moments of rebellion, meltdown, etc.  If I see a kid acting obnoxious in public, I do not automatically shoot daggers at the parent(s) and assume they're negligently turning out a little snot.  (I don't like kids, period, but I honestly do not do that.)  However, if the parent ignores said behavior or just rattles off a series of disinterested, ineffectual admonitions, I let the judging commence.  And if the kid is in my way or endangering someone (like the kid rolling around a drugstore aisle while a woman with a cane tried to maneuver around him, with Dad looking right at him and doing nothing more than motioning to him to get up because he was too busy on what was clearly a social call), they'll hear about it. 

 

MLM/Pyramid Schemes & Promo Parties:

 

I've been to a couple of Pampered Chef parties and one for some candle line, and both were fine because it was a nice evening of wine, snacks, and conversation and I don't feel any pressure to buy no matter what someone does.  But I've heard so many horror stories of people whose friends or co-workers tried to recruit them into the cult, and that would annoy the hell out of me.  I always think of the Designing Women episode when Charlene gets sucked in to becoming a Lady June Belle, selling cleaning products.  ("You can't be in here, you're not Belles."  "Oh yes we are.  We're hell's belles and we're getting you out of here.")

 

Vocal-fry/upspeak

 

This is a goddamned epidemic, and it needs to stop.  I do not remember the Valley Girl phase being this widespread and annoying -- and I lived quite close to the San Fernando Valley.

Edited by Bastet
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'I was in a large grocery store on a Saturday morning - my bad - and the place was packed.  You could hear a child "literally" screaming bloody murder throughout the store.  Seriously, shoppers were stopping in the aisles to ask each other "Is someone murdering a child?"   When I finally entered the same aisle as the not-yet-dead child, I saw a boy about 8 screaming his head off, while mom and grandma carried on shopping.   Finally, one older lady whispered "poor dear, maybe he's autistic."  I don't give a tiny rat's hiney what the child's problem was. There were two adults.  If he can't handle grocery stores at all, he can stay home with one of the adults.  If he was just having a temporary meltdown, one adult should have taken him the car. I get there are times when parents don't have a choice but to drag a child along.  But this parent had a choice.

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One of my summer jobs was a cashier in a grocery store.  I am inordantly peeved when I see that someone has changed their mind about an item and sets it down on the closest shelf.  I even see cold items and meat randomly strewn about the store - so so inconsiderate!  If you don't take it back to the proper location, at least take it up to the cashier.  They always have other items that need to be re-shelved and it really is not a big deal.
Is it true (at least at the store you worked at) that if perishables get found somewhere, they're supposed to be discarded?  If so, then it annoys me more than it already did, because if the store has to chuck what had been a perfectly salable item, it seems to me that it's a loss for them the same as if it had been stolen.

 

Please get off your horn, you made your point in 2 seconds!
Well, technically horns aren't there to make a point but rather to alert other drivers of things, and one's own irritation doesn't count, so even 2 seconds is too long.  But really, honking out of anger doesn't even make any sense.  Either the person you're honking at knows what they did was bad and feel bad about it without you honking, or they don't and therefore don't know you're honking at them, or they don't give a fuck that they did something annoying.  So in all three cases, the honking is completely unnecessary, not to mention that it puts other drivers in the vicinity on edge as they try to determine who is honking and for what.
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Is it true (at least at the store you worked at) that if perishables get found somewhere, they're supposed to be discarded?  If so, then it annoys me more than it already did, because if the store has to chuck what had been a perfectly salable item, it seems to me that it's a loss for them the same as if it had been stolen.

 

I once spent a good 45 minutes circling a grocery store, carefully selecting each piece of produce, a beautiful pork loin, all the ingredients for a specific meal as well as everything else for the week. As I got in the line, an announcement was made "please evacuate the store."  There was an odor of melting plastic from the storage room and dozens of shoppers were made to leave immediately. (then the cute firemen arrived!).  I've always wondered what they did with all of the perishable items in the carts abandoned in the aisles. 

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Well, technically horns aren't there to make a point but rather to alert other drivers of things, so even 2 seconds is too long. But really, honking out of anger doesn't even make any sense. Either the person you're honking at knows what they did was bad and feel bad about it without you honking, or they don't and therefore don't know you're honking at them, or they don't give a fuck that they did something annoying. So in all three cases, the honking is completely unnecessary, not to mention that it puts other drivers in the vicinity on edge as they try to determine who is honking and for what.

EXACTLY!!! More and more drivers these days seem to find it perfectly acceptable to layyyyy on their horns for extended amounts of times for the stupidest of infractions, which means the rest of us otherwise sane drivers on the road all cringe at once. And it's times like this those when I wish car horns just didn't exist period. Seriously.

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Is it true (at least at the store you worked at) that if perishables get found somewhere, they're supposed to be discarded?  If so, then it annoys me more than it already did, because if the store has to chuck what had been a perfectly salable item, it seems to me that it's a loss for them the same as if it had been stolen.

That was the rule.  The reality was that the stock guys usually nabbed it if it wasn't actually deadly.  Their favorite was when someone put down something from the deli, especially deli meat.  They'd nab a roll from the bakery and be in nirvana.

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The grocery store that I shop at has these mini grocery carts for kids to use, with a sign on it that says something like, "Future Customer!" Cute idea but more often than not I see kids running with them, not looking where they're going while pushing their little carts into people. I guess if they're entertained that's all that matters though!

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From several days ago:

 

Betweenyouandme's story reminded me of something that happened several years ago. A coworker's husband invited several of us to dinner to celebrate his wife's birthday. When the check came, the husband passed it around so we could all pay for our meal. Some of us looked at each other like, are you kidding?

Ack, this post reminded me of an annoying situation I had with a friend the other day. When we go out, she prefers that we each pay our own way. This can get a bit annoying because my friend likes to keep track and it's not like either of us often carries exact change. She'll say, "Oh, I don't have cash on me, so why don't I pay for everything with a credit card and you just pay me back?" Or she'll insist on splitting the check each time. It's all very minor, but gets tedious to deal with every single time we go somewhere that requires spending money. So, anyway, the other day we were at this restaurant and the bill came around. She suggested splitting it, as usual, but I said, "No, I'll cover it," and gave my credit card to the waiter. My friend decided to be obstinate and the following conversation ensued:

 

Friend: Why aren't we going to split the check?
Me: Why should we?
Friend: Why not?
Me: But why?
Friend: Why not?
Me: Why?
Friend: Why not?
And so on.

 

Just....argh! It's not like I was taking advantage of Friend; on the contrary, I was the one offering to pay the bill! She was just being annoying because I was deviating from what she wanted/expected. I finally sorta-snapped at her that I didn't like constantly splitting things out to the last dollar, that it made me feel like a penny pincher, and that I knew neither of us would take advantage of the other, so who gives a fuck about keeping exact score. (maybe not with those exact words lol)

 

Another time, we were in a cafeteria and my friend forgot her wallet, so I said I'd cover her. She kept self-flagellating about that and saying how she'd pay me back and I was just going, "Dude, who cares? It's one meal. IDGAF." It's better than having a friend who always tries to take advantage of you, but it's still irritating to deal with someone for whom the idea of friends treating each other is apparently a foreign concept. And we're close friends, too!

Edited by galax-arena
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---Long nails:

If women had any idea what kind of germs and bacteria linger under those long nails, they'd cut them immediately. I've worked in healthcare/seniorcare positions, so I've seen it firsthand. And once you've seen food and fecal-matter stuck under long nails, you're over them forever.

---Tans, fake/spray tans & tanning beds:

It just looks so trashy to me. Why is looking like a leather handbag or a barbecued oompa-loompa desirable? What's wrong with just learning to love your skin in its naturally pasty state??

 

On the nails - I remember a study about preemies in a hospital, and death and infection statistics.  Babies cared for by nurses with fake nails got more infections, because of a bacteria that got into the respirators.  MORE BABIES DIED when cared for by fake-nailed nurses.  There are now regulations about fake nails for nurses, also for food care workers, in some states.  I don't want people with fake nails touching anything I touch. 

 

Tans - i don't get it. Maybe because I don't get tan?  I'm white, like pale, ivory-colored.   The sun makes me burn and blister and peel . I work in healthcare, and I continue to be confused by college educated people who talk about their vacations in terms of "I'll come back with a tan, you'll all be so jealous", and "I can't wait to be TAN."   Really -   is that a vacation?  sitting in the sun and baking your skin? Have you heard of melanoma?   I have had people tell me that I SHOULD get more sun, because I'm pale.  I'm stunned.   People come in varying shades of white/beige/brown/black.  Why is it OK to tell people on the pale end of that spectrum that our color is not acceptable?  

 

Kids in grocery stores.  My kids were not always well-behaved,they were not easy kids.  (ADHD, food allergies, speech delays, etc, etc. )   but I was pretty firm about tantrums in stores.  My tactic was a reward at the end of the trip.  The candy/gum shelf by the register, Mcdonald's or Dairy Queen  on the way home - if you behave in the store, you get a treat.  It worked pretty well.  It only works, though, if they know you mean it, and they don't always earn the treat.   And when my kids were older, I would give them lists of stuff to get from other aisles and bring back to me.

 

 A store in my area used to have those mini-carts for kids to push through the store.  I asked what happened to them, the manager said "they don't last long".   He explained that stores get those when they first open, to engage families, but the parents just throw them in the trunk for the kids to play with at home, and the stores don't bother to keep replacing the stolen carts.  That's my pet peeve - parents TEACHING kids to steal.  The same parents, I'm sure, would flip out when the same kids end up shoplifting. 

 

Vocal fry - drive me up a wall!  A young woman I work with does this, and I swear I'm the only one who is annoyed by it.  

Edited by backformore
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About who pays/splitting checks, etc - My parents are elderly.  when my dad goes to dinner, he pays.  He insists on it.  My siblings know this, and they will "invite"  my parents to dinner.  My dad will pay.  ALL THE TIME.  He will shout and make a scene if someone else tries to pay.   I sometimes invite my parents to my home for dinner, I never invite them out to a restaurant, because I think it is presumptuous to "invite"  them to buy me dinner.   My mom complains that my sister and my brother invite them out all the time, but I don't.  She doesn't see why it "such a big deal who pays."   I just can't bring myself to go along with this. 

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I hate when people host a party and then expect their guests to supply most of the food and drink.  Unless you've specified that it's a potluck, I think you should have a reasonable array of food and drink available (of whatever form you're going for -- it can all be munchies, it can be a barbecue, whatever) so that whatever edible/potable items people bring as a host gift are a bonus.  This isn't college, where you can just tell people to grab a six pack and come over at X time.  If you're hosting a party, then host a party.

 

As for splitting bills at restaurants, unless one of us is treating the other for some occasion, my friends and I usually split it - but 50/50, not each person putting in exactly what their food and drink cost.  (We're using credit cards, because it's more convenient than cash, so it's easy (for us, anyway) to just stick two in there and say, "Split it in half.")  If that night one person had a burger and a beer and the other had steak and two martinis, so be it -- over time, it all comes out pretty even.  I'm open to that kind of split, or to "I've got it this time, you get the next one," but figuring out to the dollar what each person owes does grate on me. 

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As for splitting bills at restaurants, unless one of us is treating the other for some occasion, my friends and I usually split it - but 50/50, not each person putting in exactly what their food and drink cost. (We're using credit cards, because it's more convenient than cash, so it's easy (for us, anyway) to just stick two in there and say, "Split it in half.") If that night one person had a burger and a beer and the other had steak and two martinis, so be it -- over time, it all comes out pretty even. I'm open to that kind of split, or to "I've got it this time, you get the next one," but figuring out to the dollar what each person owes does grate on me.

Yes, exactly. I totally agree. I mean, I don't mind asking for separate checks if the waiter/tress asks or if someone had 5 specialty cocktails and the other had none, but I don't care down to the dollar. I really don't care at all. It's the intent.

That same friend I talked about posts up, If we split, she gets annoyed and very vocal if it's just split 50/50. She will add it up, and she will ask for money. However, if hers cost more, I never hear a peep. Which again is why I don't hang out anymore with her. I don't want to feel used or embarrassed by cheapness. It ruins my meal to have to wait for her to scour the checks like she's looking over a medical chart. Which is why my motto is...go out when and where you can afford it!!!!!!!!

She also rarely leaves a tip because she thinks I tip well. Hmmm...which means I either have to then tip double or the server is no longer getting a good tip for the table.

Grrrr

I'm sorry to keep going on about the same person. We were friends for several years and used to vacation together and go out 2-4 times a week together. It was really hard for me to stop the friendship because it was so one-sided and I got my feelings hurt at least two out of every three times I saw her.

Edited by Betweenyouandme
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I hate when people host a party and then expect their guests to supply most of the food and drink. Unless you've specified that it's a potluck, I think you should have a reasonable array of food and drink available (of whatever form you're going for -- it can all be munchies, it can be a barbecue, whatever) so that whatever edible/potable items people bring as a host gift are a bonus. This isn't college, where you can just tell people to grab a six pack and come over at X time. If you're hosting a party, then host a party.

Thank you!!! Yet another pet-peeve of mine.

I've actually had arguments with friends over this---it's just plain tacky throwing parties like these, unless you've specified that it's truly a "pot luck" kinda gathering. And even then, I think it's chincey and goes against the whole point of *hosting* a party.

More and more party invites I get seem to include the dreaded words "BYOB" or "bring a dish of your choice." To which I feel like writing back, "How about you quit being such a cheapskate and admit that you either can't afford to throw a party or you simply have no class?!"

A friend of friends just sent me a housewarming invite that stated, "BYOB and bring a covered dish of your choice." I wanted to take that invite and shove it right back up his cheap ass---if I wanted to make my own food and drink my own booze I'd just stay home!!((and I'd probably enjoy myself more at home, given how lame this person and his friends truly must be))

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facebook parties where they are selling stuff (junk).  If you expect me to spend money than you need to entertain me!

  Splitting the bill is fine expect I don't drink so if you order drinks that are usually $5.00 or more splitting the check is really unfair.

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I'm a little confused. If people are mentioning right up front for people to bring food, how is that not a potluck?

I suppose it's just a case of formalities to me---if you simply organize it as a fun and stylishly casual occasion unto itself, like "So-and-so's Potluck Party", I can somewhat dig it. But when it's carelessly attached to a festive occasion like holidays or birthdays or even housewarmings, it just seems stingy and déclassé.

I've even heard of potluck-style engagement parties and wedding receptions! Yeesh!!!

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That same friend I talked about posts up, If we split, she gets annoyed and very vocal if it's just split 50/50. She will add it up, and she will ask for money. However, if hers cost more, I never hear a peep. Which again is why I don't hang out anymore with her. I don't want to feel used or embarrassed by cheapness. It ruins my meal to have to wait for her to scour the checks like she's looking over a medical chart. Which is why my motto is...go out when and where you can afford it!!!!!!!!

She also rarely leaves a tip because she thinks I tip well. Hmmm...which means I either have to then tip double or the server is no longer getting a good tip for the table.

Grrrr

I'm sorry to keep going on about the same person. We were friends for several years and used to vacation together and go out 2-4 times a week together. It was really hard for me to stop the friendship because it was so one-sided and I got my feelings hurt at least two out of every three times I saw her.

Wow - I've gotten stuck in a larger group setting where they end up splitting the bill evenly despite big differences in drink consumption and meal prices, but in smaller groups or one on one I haven't encountered that.

 

Some people just have very different views about money and check splitting.  If a friend repeatedly took the tactic yours did, I would just do the same to her or ask for separate checks from the start to save the hassle.

 

I used to work with a woman and we both would run low on cash sometimes due to our own circumstances.  There was $20 we lent back and forth to each other over the course of a couple of years, that we don't know who ended up owing whom at the end of that job.  She was a great friend, as well as co-worker, but after reading your story I appreciate her even more!

 

ETA: Bad tippers are the worst.  When I went to visit family that I only saw every 5 years or so, my cousin warned me ahead of time about Grandpa :  Do not let him leave the table after you because he would take the bulk of the tip.  He was still thinking a tip in the amount (not percent) he would have left back in the day was perfectly adequate and you were just a fool with your money.

Edited by DeLurker
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ETA: Bad tippers are the worst. When I went to visit family that I only saw every 5 years or so, my cousin warned me ahead of time about Grandpa : Do not let him leave the table after you because he would take the bulk of the tip. He was still thinking a tip in the amount (not percent) he would have left back in the day was perfectly adequate and you were just a fool with your money.

Sounds just like my mom. She's a 70-something Boomer and still can't fathom how tipping nowadays has gone up to 20-25% from the former standard 15%---and we even argue about her leaving *that* much, because she always insists on using her credit card to go out to eat, and if I don't have spare cash with me to grab the tip myself, it can get beyond embarrassing when getting the check and figuring up the tip. She will literally argue over 50 cents, and get downright ugly over one dollar.

To add insult to insult, I've left a cash tip on the table and have caught her stealing it if I don't watch her. I can't tell you how many times we have argued over this, and I've told her how she is basically stealing from servers. And me!

It really makes going out to eat with her not enjoyable, because she only regularly goes to 2-3 local restaurants she likes(often with other family/friends who won't add tip, unlike me) and I can tell by our service when the servers have spread the word that her cheap ass is an awful tipper. And then she'll ask me why we're getting treated so poorly, and I have to tell her it's because the servers all know how awful her tipping is and so then she finds another local restaurant to haunt and it's the same damned circle of shame all over again.

Yes, I've tried to get her to just enjoy a meal at my place or hers, but she likes going out and getting served her cheap Chardonnay. She won't go anywhere else or do anything else.

Never mind that she is a rich woman---she's also been raised to be a cheapskate her whole life.(her mother was a product of the Great Depression and even would pull regular "dine and ditch" routines back in her childhood)

Edited by Sun-Bun
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Sun-Bun, does she say "As a senior..." ?  Because my mother prefaces every comment with "As a senior..."  (She's done it since age 55, BTW.)

 

"As a senior, it's important to vote." "Yes, mother. I'm not a senior, but I believe it's important to vote."

"As a senior, groceries are expensive." "Yes, mother.  I'm not a senior, but I agree groceries are becoming increasingly expensive."

"As a senior, I like cookies."  "Me too."

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Sun-Bun, does she say "As a senior..." ? Because my mother prefaces every comment with "As a senior..." (She's done it since age 55, BTW.)

"As a senior, it's important to vote." "Yes, mother. I'm not a senior, but I believe it's important to vote."

"As a senior, groceries are expensive." "Yes, mother. I'm not a senior, but I agree groceries are becoming increasingly expensive."

"As a senior, I like cookies." "Me too."

My grandma would just say, "I'm old, and I can say and do what I want." Luckily, it was just words to family and friends because she stopped driving and going out alone decades before she passed away. She'd turn from being a sweet lady to too loudly proclaiming my cousin's new girl friend was "a big old gal, probably playing ball like a boy."

I loved her very much. Times like this though I tried to be quiet and let my mom change the subject. I can't be rude to a 95 yr old over something like that. It would cause a huge scene and I'd feel awful all around, drawing more attention to what was said anyway.

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ETA: Bad tippers are the worst.  When I went to visit family that I only saw every 5 years or so, my cousin warned me ahead of time about Grandpa :  Do not let him leave the table after you because he would take the bulk of the tip.  He was still thinking a tip in the amount (not percent) he would have left back in the day was perfectly adequate and you were just a fool with your money.

 

My grandma (now deceased) used to leave a DIME "for the girl" at a restaurant.  Old habit, she was born in 1890 and back then, a dime was a tip - 10% of what you might pay for a sandwich and coffee at the Woolworth's counter. And, women didn't go to dinner alone, so men were in charge of tips at nice restaurants. 

 She would also yell out - You left your money on the table!  when she saw dollars, because back in her day, tips were only coins.  

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