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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


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Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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On 12/31/2022 at 6:33 PM, SuprSuprElevated said:

My pal Jacques Pepin wants you to know the basic fundamentals of keeping a knife sharp:

 

So much great stuff in this:

  • "You need three knives, good quality knives, a 9"-12" chopping (chef's knife), a utility knife, and a paring knife" 
  • "That being said, I have like 300 knives at my home"
  • How and why to use a steel

This actually hits on one of my own peeves at something I did in my life. If I could go back in time and tell 24 year old JTMacc99 things to remember as he went along in life, one of them would be "Don't buy cheap tools. Save up the first time and buy the good one, as in the long run it's save you money, time, and risk of hurting yourself"

Given enough time, i would give examples to my younger self such as "Buy the snow blower with the slightly bigger clearing area and the big-ass engine. If you decide not to cough up the extra $300, you'll spend 13 years taking twice as long to clear snow, and eventually get annoyed and sell it to buy the big one."

Also: For the love of god, listen to what Jacques said in this video and buy a high quality chef's knife and utility knife. If you choose to get a pretty good quality knife, you'll end up spending tons of money in your life on sharpening tools, and messing around with sort of sharp knives which is a great way to cut yourself.  

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This little thing has been on every kitchen wall I have lived in and has never failed to sharpen any knife. 
An old old old black lady gave it to me as a wedding present back in 85 or 86 ( I can’t remember the year I got married or if it was 25 or 26 so the day either). She made the best food ever so I trusted her about everything.

910E0803-FAF7-4AD2-9A03-24F0D9246EA8.jpeg

Edited by stewedsquash
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19 hours ago, stewedsquash said:

I never knew what Beaver Nuggets were either until I made the mistake of going in Buc-ee’s over the summer.

I was at a Buc-ee's on the night before Thanksgiving, taking a break while driving the motorhome south.  Mr. Outlier likes their bbq sandwiches or something, but I think they were out, so we got some kolaches and were just wandering around in the store.

He spotted Beaver Nuggets near the register.  I read the ingredients and saw they were made of corn meal and said, "They sound weird," and nixed the purchase.  He didn't protest.

Then about a half hour later, a guy we know who was driving the same route was passing through, and we told him he should swing by Buc-ee's because he'd never been to one.  I stayed in the RV while Mr. Outlier went into the store with the friend, to serve as tour guide.

Of course he came back with a bag of Beaver Nuggets.  I tried one and O.M.G.  They're not like caramel corn at all.  Much much lighter and way more delicious.  As if caramel corn were reconstituted in cloud form and kissed by an angel.

The next day, Mr. O was gone on a bike ride for a couple of hours and I was left in the RV with the Beaver Nuggets and no chaperone.  I would eat a few and carefully close the bag tight and put it in the cabinet and then literally one minute later I'd be getting the bag out of the cabinet.  I was getting embarrassed by how fast I was motoring through them so I engaged in some deception and got a spoon and used that to mainline all the beaver dust in the bottom of the bag. 

They're that good.  Between the Nuggets and the to-go sweet tea I'd gotten at a new Whataburger near Nashville, I was one happy sugar fiend.

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How long skin care routines take. 
 

Makeup removal, following up with a cleanser, toner, moisturizer, eye cream, retin-A or something to treat acne, it takes forever. I also have lash and brow serums, but I don’t use them often. 

I wish I could be more low maintenance, but I want pretty skin. 

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Ooh, now I can't wait till my nuggets arrive!!

19 hours ago, JTMacc99 said:

So much great stuff in this:

  • "You need three knives, good quality knives, a 9"-12" chopping (chef's knife), a utility knife, and a paring knife" 
  • "That being said, I have like 300 knives at my home"
  • How and why to use a steel

This actually hits on one of my own peeves at something I did in my life. If I could go back in time and tell 24 year old JTMacc99 things to remember as he went along in life, one of them would be "Don't buy cheap tools. Save up the first time and buy the good one, as in the long run it's save you money, time, and risk of hurting yourself"

Given enough time, i would give examples to my younger self such as "Buy the snow blower with the slightly bigger clearing area and the big-ass engine. If you decide not to cough up the extra $300, you'll spend 13 years taking twice as long to clear snow, and eventually get annoyed and sell it to buy the big one."

Also: For the love of god, listen to what Jacques said in this video and buy a high quality chef's knife and utility knife. If you choose to get a pretty good quality knife, you'll end up spending tons of money in your life on sharpening tools, and messing around with sort of sharp knives which is a great way to cut yourself.  

I really learned to use a knife by watching Jacques Pepin on TV more than 30 years ago.  I invested in some good knives and All-Clad pans, and it's been worth every penny.

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11 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

Passive aggressive behavior. If you’re going to be an asshole, just be an asshole. 

My personal tenet. 

Some dress it up by saying "I wear my heart on my sleeve", but for me, it's really more about not having a working filter. The inability to couch one's disdain for a particular person place or thing.

No, I'll probably never be accused of being passive aggrssive.  Asshole, yes. 

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When you're removing an absolutely beautiful 9 X 13 glass dish full of baked shells & meatballs with marinara and cheese, lots of cheese; you lose your grip, dispatching fully a third of the contents all over the bottom of the hot oven. 

This👇 is some rando's squash disaster, but looks eerily similar.  Now add cheese and red sauce, lol.  Thankfully, the dish didn't break.image.png.0bc8c0843d43499c54eb48f46ed48b81.png

Edited by SuprSuprElevated
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2 hours ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

When you're removing an absolutely beautiful 9 X 13 glass dish full of baked shells & meatballs with marinara and cheese, lots of cheese; you lose your grip, dispatching fully a third of the contents all over the bottom of the hot oven. 

This👇 is some rando's squash disaster, but looks eerily similar.  Now add cheese and red sauce, lol.  Thankfully, the dish didn't break.image.png.0bc8c0843d43499c54eb48f46ed48b81.png

Oh god, that happened to me with a pan of enchiladas. And the dish did break. Just about kills ya. My sympathies.

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I belong to a FB group for a relatively obscure author I like.  It's a great place where we chat about all sorts of gentle, non-controversial things.  Anyway that's not my peeve, my peeve is one of the members has turned into a classic Debbie Downer and a day does not seem to go by where she isn't posting something sad either about her personal life or life in general. I am fairly sure she's doing this for the attention and the 'poor baby' responses but you'd think people would wise up after months of this!

So everyone else there is either way nicer than I am or better able to just ignore her.  But I feel like she's taken away my happy FB place and it's peeving me off!

Edited by Elizabeth Anne
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2 hours ago, Elizabeth Anne said:

I belong to a FB group for a relatively obscure author I like.  It's a great place where we chat about all sorts of gentle, non-controversial things.  Anyway that's not my peeve, my peeve is one of the members has turned into a classic Debbie Downer and a day does not seem to go by where she isn't posting something sad either about her personal life or life in general. I am fairly sure she's doing this for the attention and the 'poor baby' responses but you'd think people would wise up after months of this!

So everyone else there is either way nicer than I am or better able to just ignore her.  But I feel like she's taken away my happy FB place and it's peeving me off!

Would you like me to join the group, tell her to stop being a sad sack and then unjoin? I feel like I could start a lucrative business doing that. I know I wish I had someone who could tell my sister in law the same thing you need.
 

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1 hour ago, stewedsquash said:

Would you like me to join the group, tell her to stop being a sad sack and then unjoin? I feel like I could start a lucrative business doing that. I know I wish I had someone who could tell my sister in law the same thing you need.
 

Hey--you could go work for the Karen Company (they take on nasty customer service reps for folks who aren't able to fight for their rights). You'd probably shut down Debbie Downer with one 🔥 post! 

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It's not helpful when you tell someone why you're feeling awful and terrible, and they say something like, "Welcome to life" or "everyone feels that way." Makes me feel like I'm being subtly told that I am being a dramatic diva who doesn't deserve to feel a certain way.

Another peeve I’m having is this stupid fucking walking boot for the metatarsal fracture I still have. I am trying to follow the doctor’s advice, but this boot is just insane, especially inside of my house. It  is so cumbersome and feels slippery on the carpet, especially on the stairs, and it’s noisy on the bare floor. I can’t move well or stoop/squat down with it and I think it’s making the ankle on my other side feel weak/achy. It’s also making my toes feel numb, and I can’t get comfortable on the couch. I am worried that it’s not even helping, even though my actual injury doesn’t even hurt. But I’m also worried that I will have this injury forever — or a limp. And I’m worried I’m going to go broke paying for it now that I have less insurance coverage. Basically, I’m worried all the time. 

Edited by TattleTeeny
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1 hour ago, TattleTeeny said:

It's not helpful when you tell someone why you're feeling awful and terrible, and they say something like, "Welcome to life" or "everyone feels that way." Makes me feel like I'm being subtly told that I am being a dramatic diva who doesn't deserve to feel a certain way.

Understandable. 

I also understand that people generally have only so much sympathy/empathy to dole out, and if a given individual constantly posts woeful, angst-ridden content, they take a risk of losing their audience to apathy. 

Not talking about you specifically TT, or any site in particular, just in general terms. Just like an in-person conversation, after a while, people's eyes will glaze over, literally or virtually.

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1 minute ago, TattleTeeny said:

Yeah, I get it. It’s not that though. It’s probably just a reflexive response but it makes me feel like I’m not being listened to. 

The peeve I have related to not feeling listened to is when I try to tell someone something that is bothering me or even something making me happy - the key here is trying to talk about me - and they instantly turn the conversation around to something about themselves. Sigh.  I don't think I'm a me me me person, but it would be nice once in awhile to have certain specific people of my acquaintance actually talk to me about me!

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2 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

It's not helpful when you tell someone why you're feeling awful and terrible, and they say something like, "Welcome to life" or "everyone feels that way." Makes me feel like I'm being subtly told that I am being a dramatic diva who doesn't deserve to feel a certain way.

On a related note, if I tell you (general you) something bad, like my broken water pipes, please don't remind me of how many people are so much worse off than I am.  It doesn't make my situation better, and it doesn't make me feel better about my situation.  

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9 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

Yeah, I get it. It’s not that though. It’s probably just a reflexive response but it makes me feel like I’m not being listened to. 

This is part of it:

image.png.5b2cb29171523c2a7a279025df11f655.png

Again, the you is collective.

Edited by SuprSuprElevated
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Pet peeve - while I like the new emoticons I keep choosing the wrong one to express my feelings about a post.  Which if I don't notice it and change it definitely would give people the wrong idea of my thought process.  Hmm, or sadly, maybe the right idea.

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24 minutes ago, Elizabeth Anne said:

Pet peeve - while I like the new emoticons I keep choosing the wrong one to express my feelings about a post.  Which if I don't notice it and change it definitely would give people the wrong idea of my thought process.  Hmm, or sadly, maybe the right idea.

I wonder how much attention the average user pays to which one is chosen, either in bestowing or receiving.  I'm lazy, so when Love was the default for liking something, that's what I clicked, and now that it's Like, that's what I click.  I'll slide over to Laugh or Hugs when that's what I want to convey, but any sort of "Yep" reaction just gets the default rather than me parsing the degree of my reaction. 

(Okay, since I hate the clutter of posts having umpteen different reaction icons and numbers on the bottom, if a post already has all of one kind of reaction other than Like - as sometimes happens with applause - I'll slide over and pick that instead for neatness.)

They're all supposed to be positive, other than the Sad icon, which is still not negative as to the poster -- "You've shared news that makes me sad" rather than "I am saddened by how fucking dumb you are" is what it's meant for.  Now, I am sure the latter happens, just as I am sure many use the Mind Blown icon (who is not a happy-looking fellow) to react negatively to a poster's opinion (along with using it to react negatively to whatever "Wow, that is awful" action of a character or celebrity they're reporting) rather than the intended "That's so cool/fascinating, my mind is blown", and several use the Fire icon to indicate flames on the side of my face level of hatred rather than the intended "That's fire!" sentiment (which I'd never heard of until the addition of that icon).  But everything other than Sad gives the poster a reputation point, so which one of the many other options is chosen doesn't really matter.

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I accidentally hit the laughing emoji when I meant to hit the sad emoji on a post last week and panicked that the person thought I was laughing at their pain. Even after I quickly changed it, I still worried. 

My pet peeve are all of the disgusting new ads on this site. Toes covered in white gunk, oil dripping into ears, skin tags. Wtf? It is so gross.

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6 hours ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

Understandable. 

I also understand that people generally have only so much sympathy/empathy to dole out, and if a given individual constantly posts woeful, angst-ridden content, they take a risk of losing their audience to apathy. 

Not talking about you specifically TT, or any site in particular, just in general terms. Just like an in-person conversation, after a while, people's eyes will glaze over, literally or virtually.

Oh agree with you. I know some one who lost custody of her kids. All the conversation is about that… 

This person rightfully lost custody. Her kids are better off in a different home.

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10 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

Another peeve I’m having is this stupid fucking walking boot for the metatarsal fracture I still have. I am trying to follow the doctor’s advice, but this boot is just insane, especially inside of my house. It  is so cumbersome and feels slippery on the carpet, especially on the stairs, and it’s noisy on the bare floor. I can’t move well or stoop/squat down with it and I think it’s making the ankle on my other side feel weak/achy. It’s also making my toes feel numb, and I can’t get comfortable on the couch. I am worried that it’s not even helping, even though my actual injury doesn’t even hurt. But I’m also worried that I will have this injury forever — or a limp. And I’m worried I’m going to go broke paying for it now that I have less insurance coverage. Basically, I’m worried all the time. 

I'm posting something about this at the health section.

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17 hours ago, emma675 said:

I accidentally hit the laughing emoji when I meant to hit the sad emoji on a post last week and panicked that the person thought I was laughing at their pain. Even after I quickly changed it, I still worried. 

My pet peeve are all of the disgusting new ads on this site. Toes covered in white gunk, oil dripping into ears, skin tags. Wtf? It is so gross.

I have a couple of ad blockers that my son installed so I never see them.

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Here's my peeve:  I went to the new combo Dunkin/Baskin Robbins in our neighborhood, and not only did they have only a reduced complement of ice cream flavors (they didn't have my fave, Jamoca Almond Fudge), but then they didn't have the handy cone holder at the cash register so you can pay and get your change before having to pick up the cone.  I've seen this less and less often lately, unfortunately.

The manager got so angry at me for asking the cashier to hold the cone while I put my change away that he threatened to throw it at me.  He came very close.  I won't be going back there. 

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7 minutes ago, EtheltoTillie said:

The manager got so angry at me for asking the cashier to hold the cone while I put my change away that he threatened to throw it at me.  He came very close.  I won't be going back there. 

I rarely complain to higher ups but I think I'd make an exception in this situation! That kind of reaction on the part of a manager is unacceptable and I'd hope the owner(s) would feel the same way.

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43 minutes ago, Elizabeth Anne said:

I rarely complain to higher ups but I think I'd make an exception in this situation! That kind of reaction on the part of a manager is unacceptable and I'd hope the owner(s) would feel the same way.

I understand, but I won't do that.  I'll just let it go.  Won't go back there.

I'm more peeved that I'm always the one who asks about things like this and no one else does.  Everyone else just sucks it up!  Everyone who goes in there (they've been open for a month) just accepts that they have to struggle with their cone and money.  Why do I have this personality and no one else does?  And, gee they invented cone holders decades ago.  Why is this not in every store?  I now think I never want to buy an ice cream cone any more rather than face this problem again.  This isn't the first time, but it's the first time someone threatened to throw a cone at me. 

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3 hours ago, EtheltoTillie said:

Here's my peeve:  I went to the new combo Dunkin/Baskin Robbins in our neighborhood, and not only did they have only a reduced complement of ice cream flavors (they didn't have my fave, Jamoca Almond Fudge), but then they didn't have the handy cone holder at the cash register so you can pay and get your change before having to pick up the cone.  I've seen this less and less often lately, unfortunately.

The manager got so angry at me for asking the cashier to hold the cone while I put my change away that he threatened to throw it at me.  He came very close.  I won't be going back there. 

I feel sorry for the poor employees who have to work for this unstable jerk. He sounds scary.

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5 minutes ago, annzeepark914 said:

I feel sorry for the poor employees who have to work for this unstable jerk. He sounds scary.

Probably just some high school kid too. Hey, kids! Stay in school or this will be your work environment.

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4 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

Probably just some high school kid too. Hey, kids! Stay in school or this will be your work environment.

Exactly.  He was a young guy too, although unlikely a high school student--older.  I don't want to get him fired.  Again, I just get frustrated about how people look at me like I have three heads when I ask about obvious things.  Don't they see people struggle 50 times a day with the change and the cones?  Then I feel like a Karen. 

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36 minutes ago, EtheltoTillie said:

Exactly.  He was a young guy too, although unlikely a high school student--older.  I don't want to get him fired.  Again, I just get frustrated about how people look at me like I have three heads when I ask about obvious things.  Don't they see people struggle 50 times a day with the change and the cones?  Then I feel like a Karen. 

If this happened to me I'd definitely contact the corporate office. This young manager needs to learn you can't treat customers this way. I've never heard of a store employee/mgr threatening to throw something at a customer. 

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9 minutes ago, annzeepark914 said:

If this happened to me I'd definitely contact the corporate office. This young manager needs to learn you can't treat customers this way. I've never heard of a store employee/mgr threatening to throw something at a customer. 

As a store manager myself, I can't even imagine such a thing. I would email corporate, emphasing that the subordinate did nothing wrong, it was all on the manager. That person should not be managing a paper route.

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I understand your thinking here, but it's just too much for the circumstances.  To the extent I had any role in escalating the situation, I would not want to take it to that level.  It would be a grievous wrong.  I just want every store to get cone holders!

 

ETA, my multiquotes didn't work. 

Edited by EtheltoTillie
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1 hour ago, EtheltoTillie said:

Exactly.  He was a young guy too, although unlikely a high school student--older.  I don't want to get him fired.  Again, I just get frustrated about how people look at me like I have three heads when I ask about obvious things.  Don't they see people struggle 50 times a day with the change and the cones?  Then I feel like a Karen. 

A lot of people pay with their phones, so no. 

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I used to work at a Baskin Robbins. One of the first things we were trained on (after hand washing) was once you pass the food over the counter you can't take it back. I also don't recall having cone holders at the checkstand but I worked there in the late 90s / early 2000s so that memory could have been lost to time.

I wonder if they were discontinued for sanitary purposes.

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On 1/7/2023 at 10:53 AM, SuprSuprElevated said:

Understandable. 

I also understand that people generally have only so much sympathy/empathy to dole out, and if a given individual constantly posts woeful, angst-ridden content, they take a risk of losing their audience to apathy. 

Not talking about you specifically TT, or any site in particular, just in general terms. Just like an in-person conversation, after a while, people's eyes will glaze over, literally or virtually.

 

On 1/7/2023 at 11:55 AM, Browncoat said:

On a related note, if I tell you (general you) something bad, like my broken water pipes, please don't remind me of how many people are so much worse off than I am.  It doesn't make my situation better, and it doesn't make me feel better about my situation.  

Agree with both of you.

What’s that saying, a broken toe may not be a broken leg, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt. I think there should be a balance between being dismissive of someone’s pain/toxic positivity and dealing with people who are constant doom and gloom, especially when there is no reason for it. I deal with my own mental health struggles, and I’ve found I’m happier limiting my interaction with negative Nancys. I know I rant about her a lot, but my sister is one of them. She’s healthy, makes great money, spared a lot of the trauma I experienced, but she constantly focuses on negativity. I can only try to cheer her up and encourage her to get professional help (like I have) so many times. I’m concerned how she would handle a health struggle or loss of a loved one when someone deleting her on SM or the MAC counter being booked put her in a sour mood. 

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18 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

think there should be a balance between being dismissive of someone’s pain/toxic positivity and dealing with people who are constant doom and gloom, especially when there is no reason for it.

This made me think of this:

3DD30AE8-5A2D-4785-A490-FB27BA2C9421.jpeg

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31 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

 

Agree with both of you.

What’s that saying, a broken toe may not be a broken leg, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt. I think there should be a balance between being dismissive of someone’s pain/toxic positivity and dealing with people who are constant doom and gloom, especially when there is no reason for it. I deal with my own mental health struggles, and I’ve found I’m happier limiting my interaction with negative Nancys. I know I rant about her a lot, but my sister is one of them. She’s healthy, makes great money, spared a lot of the trauma I experienced, but she constantly focuses on negativity. I can only try to cheer her up and encourage her to get professional help (like I have) so many times. I’m concerned how she would handle a health struggle or loss of a loved one when someone deleting her on SM or the MAC counter being booked put her in a sour mood. 

Beautifully put!  it's never good to be dismissive of other's problems and feelings, but to offer the right kind and amount of sympathy and support requires finding the balance as you say.  Also, it is good take care of yourself and not let others drag you down.  It took me a long time to learn that I had a right to not let people drag me into their downward spiral. I didn't need to "adopt" another adult and take responsibility/ownership of their issues.

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16 hours ago, EtheltoTillie said:

Again, I just get frustrated about how people look at me like I have three heads when I ask about obvious things.  Don't they see people struggle 50 times a day with the change and the cones?  Then I feel like a Karen. 

 

15 hours ago, PRgal said:

A lot of people pay with their phones, so no. 

 

15 hours ago, theredhead77 said:

I used to work at a Baskin Robbins. One of the first things we were trained on (after hand washing) was once you pass the food over the counter you can't take it back. I also don't recall having cone holders at the checkstand but I worked there in the late 90s / early 2000s so that memory could have been lost to time.

I wonder if they were discontinued for sanitary purposes

@EtheltoTillie I don't feel you did anything wrong and don't want to make you feel bad for asking so please don't take it that way. These two responses were what I was thinking; sanitary reasons and many people now use apple pay or tap-and-go cards to pay, even when I pay cash I just throw the change in my pocket real quick, heck, I've dumped it in my purse if I don't have pockets, and I take care of it later. I do not think the manager handled it well however. He  could have just explained that for sanitary reasons the cashier is not allowed to touch it. 

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Thanks for the follow up, @KittyMom4.  I should have been paying with my phone, like I do most places, duh.

Or I should have walked out with no cone at all.  Recall that they didn't have my favorite flavor, but I purchased a pralines and cream for my husband, who was waiting outside with our dog.  I really was craving that Jamoca Almond Fudge. 

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