Michaella and Brandon: He Writes Fairy Tales

[BitterApple]

Thank God Brandon and Michaela got married before the new Duggar scandal broke.

Omg, could you imagine? The Bateses probably didn't even want them there as it is but felt obligated to extend the invitation. If the scandal had broken before the 15th, I wonder if Gil would have disinvited them. I can't imagine he'd let Cheating Doughboy upstage the most important day in his daughter's life.

Regarding subs over BBQ, I wonder if I Michael figured it would be easier and less messy to order large deli trays versus chicken or pork that has to be seasoned, prepared and then kept hot for several hours.

Edited August 20, 2015 by BitterApple

[IndianPaintbrush]

Well, Jana Duggar was one of Michael's bridesmaids.  I doubt the Bates would have disinvited the whole family based on Josh's fuckups.  Were Josh & Anna even there?  I haven't seen photos of them.

 

ETA: I saw an article that said Anna was at the wedding, but not Josh.  

 

Last night's episode had Michael shopping for a wedding dress.  She didn't buy the one she wanted because it was too expensive with all the alterations.  I wondered why Michael didn't do this earlier and attempt the alterations herself.  But maybe she figured it was better to leave the alterations to a professional.

Edited August 21, 2015 by IndianPaintbrush

[zenme]

Thank God Brandon and Michaela got married before the new Duggar scandal broke.

 

IKR? It would have been all the talk at the wedding.

[Flowers]

It's probably just as well that Brandon's family doesn't have a blog. They probably want to have private lives.

That's why his mom's hair is so big. It's FULL OF SECRETS.

[JessDVD]

Four for you, Flowers, you go, Flowers.

I cannot imagine doing alterations on my own wedding dress and I'm relatively handy with a sewing machine. I can understand Michaela refraining.

I sorta know someone who either knows or sorta knows Brandon or his family and I'm dying to ask her about some of the stuff mentioned here but I'm refraining to be polite and non-intrusive. It's a trial.

[Ilovemylabs]

Where do you find it on demand?  I only see HBO, Showtime, History, FX on demand on my new TV.  Really, appreciate it is someone answers.

 

My house burned down last year and I am just back in it.  I don't' have everything returned that will be returned, and wish I could put up a registry.  In my case, if it didn't burn outright, I don't get anything back that had any fabric on it at all, like couches or dining room chairs.  Got the table, no chairs.  No clothes, no linens, no towels, no sheets, no throw or bathroom rugs, nothing from the bedrooms or bathrooms.  If not burned, melted, it was too badly smoke damaged.  Their list shows I do have a TV but they didn't return it,, nor the stand, and it's questionable if it even worked anymore.  I had some things I really didn't want to lose and can't replace, but haven't unpacked very many boxes because there is no where to put whatever is in them.  No furniture.  There is another load coming but who knows when.  It's a real mess.

You poor thing!  Hugs to you.

[BitterApple]

Brandon's family has no blog?! I thought they were mandatory in Fundieland?

[riverblue22]

Michael is a very serious girl, isn't she?  Both she and Brandon seemed to be lacking a sense of humor.  Dull days ahead for those two.

[trimthatfat]

Even when Michael is with Carlin and Tori (who never shut up), she is very much subdued and keeps to herself. I guess that's just her personality.

 

I was a little surprised that Michael's budget wasn't enough for the dress she wanted. I didn't think $2K was terrible including alterations. I hope she didn't settle for a dress she didn't love just because it was cheaper. I've been sewing for 20+ years and I would never try to alter a wedding gown. It's not even worth the money that will be saved. My friend tried to alter her dress by cutting three inches off of the bottom and she botched the job so badly, the dress ended up hitting her mid-calf. She just kept cutting and cutting to make the length even.

Edited August 23, 2015 by trimthatfat

[Sew Sumi]

The dress she tried at the bridal shop was a thousand times better than that cheap thing with the horribly re-constructed bodice that she ended up with. I get that she's cheap, but she also has to look at those pictures of her in that horrible dress for the rest of her life. She really needed the nicer dress to make the wedding look less cheap, which it was all-around. 

 

Here's the cake, for your judgment. :D

 

https://instagram.com/p/6vnP3EMbim/

[CarolMK]

I like the cake better than her wedding dress. Wonder if maybe Michaela (that's what Brandon and now Kelly are calling her so I'm going with that) just preferred a simpler dress? I did like two of the ones she tried on at the dress shop. As for the cost, I'm surprised that the dress wasn't going to be comped as a result of being on their show, but maybe the Bates family doesn't receive a big salary since they're on a smaller network than TLC.  Does anybody have any idea what the ratings are for this show?

[trimthatfat]

The cake design is very busy with the bow and what appears to be a picture frame at the top. I don't like it, but I believe Kelly (and some of the kids) said her sister makes incredible cakes so I bet it was delicious.

 

Just looked at Michael and Brandon's IG - they've already posted a PDA pic. Haha. I wasn't expecting that from them.

Edited August 24, 2015 by trimthatfat

[Absolom]

I thought the cake was too busy also.  At least it's nice than that one cake we saw earlier. 

 

I wondered about the dress not being comped after the shop was in the episode.  At least they could have offered more than a 20% discount for the advertisement. 

 

The ratings aren't great in the big world.  I've only found any for one episode.  They are probably good for such a tiny network though.

[lookeyloo]

The cake design is very busy with the bow and what appears to be a picture frame at the top. I don't like it, but I believe Kelly (and some of the kids) said her sister makes incredible cakes so I bet it was delicious.

 

Just looked at Michael and Brandon's IG - they've already posted a PDA pic. Haha. I wasn't expecting that from them.

Don't love the cake.  Looks like Michaela has dropped some weight for the wedding.  Not fat shaming, just noticing that she did what a lot of brides do (me included).  

 

And they seem like better kissers than any of the Duggars.

[BitterApple]

Don't love the cake. Looks like Michaela has dropped some weight for the wedding. Not fat shaming, just noticing that she did what a lot of brides do (me included).

And they seem like better kissers than any of the Duggars.

When they were shopping for dresses, Michael requested something that would make her look slim, so maybe her weight was an insecurity for her. She wasn't fat by any means but it seems like these Fundies prize extreme thinness, whether it suits your body type or not.

[lookeyloo]

Agree she wasn't fat at all, just looked smaller in the gown and kissing pic.  I hope this turns out to be what she expected and more (not less!)  PS, I had a cousin who was average, not in a bad way. - just the way most of us are.  For her wedding she went on a huge diet and had her makeup professionally done.  The groom hardly recognized her!!

[RedBaron]

https://instagram.com/p/6sgYbyPmW2/?taken-by=brandon_michael_jn15

 

Aw. looks like Brandon and Michael are enjoying their honeymoon.

[riverblue22]

I'm pretty sure that lake picture is Jenny Lake north of Jackson Hole, Wyoming.

[IndianPaintbrush]

Really?  They just went up, like, 20 notches.  I live in Wyoming and my husband and I also honeymooned in Jackson Hole & the Tetons.

[IndianPaintbrush]

Wow. After watching Michaela's refusal to let go of Kaci Lynn in last week's episode, I am genuinely concerned she is going to kidnap one of her nieces or nephews if she doesn't get pregnant soon.                                                              

[BitterApple]

3 hours ago, IndianPaintbrush said:

Wow. After watching Michaela's refusal to let go of Kaci Lynn in last week's episode, I am genuinely concerned she is going to kidnap one of her nieces or nephews if she doesn't get pregnant soon.                                                              

That sounds like the makings of a Lifetime movie. 

[luvmylabs]

I like the genuineness of the Bates, as opposed to the Duggars.  Everything with the Duggars seems so  GRIM to me.  You don't see a lot of genuine smiles or hysterical laughter.  Fundy or not, the Bates seem more genuine.  Their personal religious values come up occasionally, but they are not pushed like they are on the Duggar show.  We've seen broken 'courting' twice with the Bates (Zach and Nathan) but never once with the Duggars.  I think the Bates raise their kids and let them go out there to enjoy life, and make mistakes, if that is what is going to happen.

[dargosmydaddy]

4 hours ago, luvmylabs said:

We've seen broken 'courting' twice with the Bates (Zach and Nathan) but never once with the Duggars. 

Josiah and Marjorie...

[andromeda331]

Josh also had one before Anna. Holt or someone, that family that was featured in the first special 14 Kids and Counting.

[luvmylabs]

21 hours ago, dargosmydaddy said:

Josiah and Marjorie...

I stand corrected!  Thanks!  But the Duggars didn't really deal with Josiah and Marjorie's breakup on the show, did they?  They were too busy with Joshgate.  I thought the episode with Nathan and his breakup was kind of touching.

[Sew Sumi]

On 10/16/2016 at 1:41 PM, andromeda331 said:

Josh also had one before Anna. Holt or someone, that family that was featured in the first special 14 Kids and Counting.

Yeah, Kaeliegh Holt. All we've been told is that the fathers basically betrothed them at 14, before Smuggar began molesting his sisters. We never did find out when in the process Jim Holt broke it off, but if Smuggar had to repent in front of the homechurch, well, the Holts were there. 

Back to Michael, I also wondered about her refusal to let go of Kaci Lynn at the picnic. I get that the rest of the family, aside from Alyssa, gets to see her all the time, but even so, that was excessive. 

[BitterApple]

Michael's always been kind of an odd duck to me. I wouldn't be surprised if she's a total psycho underneath those frumpers and Keds. Something about the way she was so obsessed over Brandon was just weird. I think Alyssa is the most normal member of the family (relatively speaking, of course).

[Gweilo]

IF Michael is struggling to get pregnant, and IF her family knows, and they keep talking on TV about how much she just looooooves babies, that's such a dick move, Bateses.

[Sew Sumi]

I think Michael and Brandon attended the Staddon/Neely wedding, an IBLP Royalty affair (brother of the groom Robert Staddon is David Waller's bestie), and I believe the groom also works at Headquarters. The wedding was in mid-July and took place in bumfuck North Carolina, so the 3 hour drive through the backroads of the Appalachians makes sense. Erin wasn't at this picnic, but they probably need to keep her off camera for the time being until they air her birth special, or maybe she actually had to give a piano lesson or something. Brooklyn was born on my anniversary, 8/6, and in Show Timing, Erin is still pregnant. 

[Absolom]

Erin was at the picnic and still pregnant.  She was sitting on a blanket with Carson. 

[Sew Sumi]

Ah, I missed seeing her. But it works with the timeline I threw out there. This season (#21 on Thursday) has dragged on FOREVER! Are they going to end with Brooklyn's birth or start Season 5 with it? 

I'd throw out a Michael pregnancy announcement, but as of early August (hell, as of maybe a few weeks ago now), she's not pregnant - or admitting to it - on social media. And trust me, she gets bombarded with that question on every post she makes, poor thing. 

[Absolom]

I was looking for Erin to see what Carson looked like at the picnic.  I didn't see Chad though.  I have the feeling Michael will announce on her own schedule and won't be as open as Erin if there are problems. 

[IndianPaintbrush]

12 hours ago, Gweilo said:

IF Michael is struggling to get pregnant, and IF her family knows, and they keep talking on TV about how much she just looooooves babies, that's such a dick move, Bateses.

I don't think Michaela minds people talking about how much she loves babies.  She's quite open about it, and she was the one who made a big show of refusing to let go of Kaci Lynn.  A dick move would be talking about why she's not pregnant yet, but the family isn't doing that.

[Sew Sumi]

Not on camera, at any rate. And I bet if it was taped, Kelly likely asked that they not use that footage. Michael doesn't strike me as the type to make waves, even if they concern (and in this case potentially hurt) her. 

[flyingdi]

In defense of Michael, I truly believe every family has that one person who monopolizes the new babies.  Just grabs them and won't let them go for the whole visit.

[cereality]

Just saw a preview for the new season starting on Thursday -- and it looks like Brandon and Michaels ARE having trouble conceiving and are choosing to be open about it/discuss it on the show. I'm a bit surprised with the openness actually -- though maybe it makes their lives easier this way bc all of their fundie friends and family members won't be in their face as much or whispering about why 18 months post-wedding there isn't a baby yet. In the preview Michaela says that she always assumed when you want to start a family, you start one -- she didn't anticipate/realize there would be problems. And then Brandon said something about leaving it in God's hand and viewing this as God saying -- not right now -- rather than saying no. I hope Brandon turns out to be like Chad -- supportive of his wife no matter what. I mean they're young so they probably will have a baby, but I hope he can still make her feel special/content even if she ends up not being a mom -- given that that was her life's goal.

[Sew Sumi]

Yeah, I saw that preview during the Bates marathon they dropped last Thursday. I hope that Michael has been tested for the blood clotting disorder that Erin has. However, with that said, Erin had THREE miscarriages in pretty short order before Carson was conceived. Even with her problems, he was conceived around 9 months into their marriage. 

We don't know if Michael has suffered miscarriages, but I think they would have mentioned them to drum up social media sympathy for her, especially the leghumpers on IG who keep asking her if she's pregnant. That has to hurt. At any rate, if she has not even conceived yet, they might want to get Brandon checked out. But these ARE fundies, and the problem NEVER resides with the man. What fundie man have we ever heard admit that his swimmers weren't up to par? I've followed fundies for years and NOT A SINGLE MAN has owned up to issues with his sperm. Why would Brandon be any different? Whatever's wrong will remain Michael's fault (and her guilt), and it will just be chalked up to "God's will," as Brandon has already been quoted as saying. 

All that said, it will be interesting to see how they have treated their infertility. If it is even considered as such; it hasn't even been 18 months yet. 

[BitterApple]

I haven't seen the preview, but it doesn't sound like Brandon is too interested in getting to the root of the problem. The "leaving it in God's hands" rationalization sounds like a cop out to me.

[cereality]

I feel like Erin and Chad aggressively sought out treatment and would have done the same if the problem had been with Chad -- though I'm sure they would have kept it on the DL that Prince Chad was having trouble getting his woman pregnant. It just seems like Chad and Erin have a more "equal" marriage -- or at least as equal as a fundie marriage can be. Meaning if Chad had taken the approach of -- it's God's will, we'll just keep trying -- and who knows maybe he did -- I feel like Erin would have felt comfortable saying to him she didn't want to just sit and wait and she believed it was God's will that they seek out medical care and Chad would have moved mountains to get them to the right doctor. With Brandon and Michaela -- I just don't know. I feel like Brandon "controls" the marriage in that quiet, headship way. So if Brandon says --it's God's will -- I bet Michaela just nods along, even if she would rather seek out medical advice; I feel like she probably can't even bring it up and if she brings it up, he'll shut it down and tell her they need to simply pray harder. It's the set up for guilt and resentment for the wife bc she wants something desperately that she isn't getting and she can't seek out medical advice bc her husband says no/it isn't necessary/doesn't believe in it . . . .

[Absolom]

I more got the feeling that Brandon was deflecting the conversation.  He didn't seem to want to get into details so do some God talk to derail it all.  That maintains both the religious perspective and also their privacy. 

[BitterApple]

Cereality, that's the vibe I get as well. Michael is so grateful she didn't end up a Spinster that she's not going to rock the boat and question Brandon or risk upsetting him in any way. That's why I've said a million times it's never ideal for a woman to be in a relationship where she's more into the guy than he is to her. It skews the power in the guy's favor and puts the woman in a position where she's always walking on eggshells trying to earn his love. 

[andromeda331]

Exactly, and don't forget this is her dream guy. Michael waited years to be with Brandon. She'll do anything he says because she waited for him and now finally is with him.

[Autumn0516]

Michaela just posted a blog post about her infertility and trusting God. 

[Sew Sumi]

We have a good discussion going on on the Sweet Fellowship thread (Duggars board). You can read the blog post there. 

[trimthatfat]

On 6/25/2017 at 2:51 PM, Autumn0516 said:

Michaela just posted a blog post about her infertility and trusting God. 

I just saw it. She mentioned seeing a specialist and "tests". The wording was kind of vague in the blog about the kind of testing, but I respect her privacy so I can understand why she didn't specify. It's great and brave of her to share this difficult moment - there are a lot of women out there who can relate who might feel embarrassed about their own fertility issues.

It really breaks my heart when these young women beat themselves up for not being able to have children immediately, but that's what happens when you raise children to believe their main worth is in their ability to conceive kids. I can't imagine the toll it takes on her to see her siblings have children while she's waiting. If Tori and Bobby marry and have children before Michael, I'm sure that'll send her tumbling emotionally.

Edited August 13, 2017 by trimthatfat

[luvmylabs]

On 8/13/2017 at 8:03 AM, trimthatfat said:

I just saw it. She mentioned seeing a specialist and "tests". The wording was kind of vague in the blog about the kind of testing, but I respect her privacy so I can understand why she didn't specify. It's great and brave of her to share this difficult moment - there are a lot of women out there who can relate who might feel embarrassed about their own fertility issues.

It really breaks my heart when these young women beat themselves up for not being able to have children immediately, but that's what happens when you raise children to believe their main worth is in their ability to conceive kids. I can't imagine the toll it takes on her to see her siblings have children while she's waiting. If Tori and Bobby marry and have children before Michael, I'm sure that'll send her tumbling emotionally.

Having gone through this myself, I can say that the testing she and Brandon have had thus far is pretty standard for fertility issues.  In this last episode they were pretty specific about the testing they are having done now.  How long have they been married.  The usual time to see a specialist if you haven't conceived after a year of unprotected sex...I was older so we only waited 6 months.

[Sew Sumi]

They'd been married 2 years (almost exactly) when they visited Dr. Vick. 

[luvmylabs]

On 1/31/2018 at 4:02 PM, XrystalPond said:

Fertility issues are hard no matter what the belief system or thoughts you have about the role of women versus men, etc. However, it has to be even harder when she has not only been brought up to believe that a woman's role is strictly to be a wife and mother. I know of situations with some evangelicals and fundamentalists where the husband believes it is within his rights to divorce the woman if she cannot have children. Women with fertility issues (or even issues that can lead to infertility) are basically considered damaged goods and not worthy of a husband who could marry someone else and contribute to providing soldiers for God's Army.

I sincerely hope that this is not the case for Michael and Brandon's beliefs. She seems like a good person who wants to have a family of her own. It's got to be tough dealing with these issues in such a patriarchal system and with two sisters who are now both on their third child each.  Due to cancer and other issues, I had a complete hysterectomy. While I did have children, it was difficult to be around family who were popping out babies left and right all the time. We're not even a family that celebrates that (cultural differences), but it still was painful to walk into a family event and smell the baby powder or see all the blankets and tiny little beings. I am lucky to have a husband who understands and just reminds me of all the things we can do not tied down with an infant and all the amazing things still to come. I hope that Michael and Brandon can see those things too.

I know those feelings so well!  Everyone in my age group, family and friends were having kids.  Those things go in cycles...everyone is getting engaged, everyone is getting married, everyone is having kids.  You do tend to feel left out.  And people can be unintentionally cruel with their questions.  That being said, I doubt that infertility would cause Brandon and Michaela to even consider divorce.  Like us, they will probably turn to adoption.  As I had printed on my kid's 'birth' announcements, "You didn't grow under my heart, but in it."

[floridamom]

About the adoption thing...although Kelly's mother adopted, I believe two girls, Kelly and her mother are complete opposites of one another. From what I have seen, Mrs. Kelly's mother doesn't adhere to any of the Gothard/ATI/IBLP stuff that Kelly and Gil believe in. Her mother seems to be a mainstream regular Christian person. Didn't she marry her present husband in a regular Lutheran Church? That woman looks great, dresses great and seems to live a normal life. Many things, I'm sure Kelly and Gil don't adhere to. I bet Kelly's mother goes to the movies, watches regular television and has kissed her present husband prior to marrying...I bet they also were ALONE TOGETHER from time to time. My opinion would be although Kelly has feelings for her adopted sister(s) she doesn't believe in the practice....Gil also would not allow it in his home.

[andromeda331]

3 hours ago, floridamom said:

About the adoption thing...although Kelly's mother adopted, I believe two girls, Kelly and her mother are complete opposites of one another. From what I have seen, Mrs. Kelly's mother doesn't adhere to any of the Gothard/ATI/IBLP stuff that Kelly and Gil believe in. Her mother seems to be a mainstream regular Christian person. Didn't she marry her present husband in a regular Lutheran Church? That woman looks great, dresses great and seems to live a normal life. Many things, I'm sure Kelly and Gil don't adhere to. I bet Kelly's mother goes to the movies, watches regular television and has kissed her present husband prior to marrying...I bet they also were ALONE TOGETHER from time to time. My opinion would be although Kelly has feelings for her adopted sister(s) she doesn't believe in the practice....Gil also would not allow it in his home.

I do agree. Despite having two sisters who are black Kelly still had that Confederate room. You do not put up a picture of Nathan Bedford Forrest if you love your sisters.