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Meet the Parents: Gil and Kelly Jo Bates

Meredith Quill

By Meredith Quill
in Bringing Up Bates

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Notabug

Notabug

1 hour ago, Heathen said:

It is creepy and alarming, but considering how naive and sheltered most fundies are, I wouldn't say Kelton was a man at 18. Biologically yes, but certainly not intellectually or emotionally. He was probably Josie's peer in terms of emotional maturity. 

Still creepy and alarming. I would have major issues if I had an eighteen-year-old son who wanted to date a fourteen-year-old. I know a couple who started dating when she was fifteen and he was 27. I want to ask how the HELL that was allowed. What were her parents thinking and did his bother to explain he could go to prison for it? That it was creepy and disgusting at bare minimum? 

Many states have a 'close in age exemption' for underage teens having sex.  In Tennessee, the age of consent is 18.  However, people under 18 may legally have sex as long as there is less than a 4 year gap in their ages.  Not that Kelton and Josie would've had sex if they had been allowed to see one another when she was 14; but, it would've been against the law until she turned 18.

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So unbelievable
So unbelievable

If anyone played Lawson's "music" while on my deathbed, I will haunt you for eternity for subjecting me to that shit!

Heathen
Heathen

I question the maturity of someone who uses those stupid emojis in a post about her mother's death. Grow up, Kelly. Act like an adult instead of a goddamn twelve-year-old. 

BetyBee
BetyBee

The latest podcast episode of Digging up the Duggars is about Gil and is entitled "Gil Needs a Story and a Swingset". It's really good and is all about Gil's philosophy of praying for every little thi

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BitterApple

BitterApple

Omg, I don't know if any of you are on the Bates subReddit, but if you haven't seen this video watch the first two minutes.

Alyssa is doing a Q&A with Kelly, and someone asked how strict Kelly was with the older kids versus the younger. Kelly claims she did ALL the child rearing. Notice how Alyssa's body language and expression abruptly shift, like every fiber of her being is fighting to stay silent. 

https://www.reddit.com/r/BringingUpBates/comments/wbmlu5/alyssas_video_part_2/

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floridamom

floridamom

Thank you, BitterApple for that video post. Where is part 1? I agree with the notice of Alyssa's body language about the sister-moms raising the kids. Kelly is full of it there. Also, Kelly did a great tap dance about wearing pants...so, it's "ok" now to be Godly and still wear pants, etc? Why then when the girls were younger were they required to wear the pinafore uniform? Surely, the family mentioned this to Kelly as their "different ideas" were introduced to the relatives. Why not let Callie, etc wear pants/shorts now? Regarding Kelly's weight and health; it's hard for anyone to be publicly asked about their weight. I agree though, that Kelly is a bit lazy about losing some pounds. Perhaps if she got herself up off the recliner, cleaned and organized her house, she would burn a few calories in the process. I am NOT body-shaming the woman at all, just commenting on a public question and answer that was given by Kelly herself. I hope she can take better control of her HEALTH. She is a very pretty woman, always has been.

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BetyBee

BetyBee

33 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

Omg, I don't know if any of you are on the Bates subReddit, but if you haven't seen this video watch the first two minutes.

Alyssa is doing a Q&A with Kelly, and someone asked how strict Kelly was with the older kids versus the younger. Kelly claims she did ALL the child rearing. Notice how Alyssa's body language and expression abruptly shift, like every fiber of her being is fighting to stay silent. 

https://www.reddit.com/r/BringingUpBates/comments/wbmlu5/alyssas_video_part_2/

I ended up watching all of part 2. KJ was not as annoying as in the past. If she has toned down her "charm" then I'm impressed! I didn't know she had surgery either. She was very honest about her struggles with losing weight. She doesn't look healthy, so I hope she cuts back on her sugary drinks and gets regular exercise. It would be nice to be around for all those grandkids! She's probably kidding herself about raising her babies herself, but lots of people change their own history to make themselves look better. I'm sure Alyssa hasn't forgotten the hard times and all the responsibilities the older ones (especially the girls) had. They had no choice in the matter!

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BitterApple

BitterApple

(edited)

Here's Part 1:

https://www.reddit.com/r/BringingUpBates/comments/wbm8aq/alyssas_video_part_1/

With regards to Kelly and weight loss, one thing that stood out to me was how she described herself as an emotional eater. I feel like if she got to the root of why she reaches for food whenever she's sad, depressed, anxious, etc., it would pave the way for a healthier lifestyle. Obviously the Bible verses aren't working. She probably needs to see a therapist. 

Edited by BitterApple
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floridamom

floridamom

I watched the first part...thank you, Bitter Apple for that. The simplest advice for losing weight naturally would be to do what I did some years ago. I lost 52 pounds simply by eating less and moving more. I walked twice a day up and down my own block. It didn't cost me one dollar to do those things. I also danced in the mirror by myself listening to old pop music. There is no real secret to losing weight. These things will do it for you if you are diligent and stick to it.  Why do people who send questions in ask the same old ones over and over again? I thought part 2 was a bit more in-depth. Kelly could never live in Florida if she continues her current style of clothing. It is way too hot down here most of the year to wear those heavy denim skirts and blouses she sports. Her hair would be pulled up above her neck most of the time also. Today it will be 96deg here in Orlando...not including the heat index and humidity. I'm glad Alyssa dresses her children in normal clothing and bathing suits.  Yes, some history has been re-written by Kelly in this Q&A. 

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SMama

SMama

22 minutes ago, Absolom said:

Kelly is going the wrong way on her weight.  She looks heavier in that video than the last time I saw her.  Although I do like that top and that she seems quite comfortable in pants.  She's reached the point in life where she'll likely be fighting her weight the rest of her life.  

She was wearing pants? How did ai miss that?

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Cinnabon

Cinnabon

(edited)
4 hours ago, BetyBee said:

but lots of people change their own history to make themselves look better.

Let’s call it exactly what it is  - she lies. 

4 hours ago, SMama said:

The full Q&A video is on Alyssa’s YouTube. Kelly did some serious history revision. 

Lies. 🤣

Edited by Cinnabon
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ozziemom

ozziemom

I almost laughed out loud when KJ was explaining how she dealt with morning sickness and taking care of all the other kids. Apparently she would lay on the couch and they would gather around with their workbooks. Yeah right. We’ve seen evidence of how wild the Bateses were when they were younger. In actuality Michael was probably taking care of them all while Alyssa cooked. Sounds like Gil was never around to help. That I believe.

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Salacious Kitty

Salacious Kitty

(edited)
23 minutes ago, ozziemom said:

I almost laughed out loud when KJ was explaining how she dealt with morning sickness and taking care of all the other kids. Apparently she would lay on the couch and they would gather around with their workbooks. Yeah right. We’ve seen evidence of how wild the Bateses were when they were younger. In actuality Michael was probably taking care of them all while Alyssa cooked. Sounds like Gil was never around to help. That I believe.

That might have been when Gil still worked at Nabisco. He was probably around a lot more after he quit and tried to work for himself. It's never been made clear when they found Gothard, but I assume that coincided with Gil quitting his benefitted job.

Edited by Salacious Kitty
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So unbelievable

So unbelievable

As usual, I ff through most of the "interview" on Reddit.  Her voice is so grating to me.  Those questions are nothing new, except the ones about her health.  I would be trying a lot harder if I was faced with those health risks.  I also would think her kids were try to steer her in the right direction with eating and exercise.  She used to go on walks with a lot of the girls.  Maybe that was only when they were about to pop.

I've not seen KJ with her hair down in ages it seems.  It always looks horrible when she has it up in a clip.   A hot mess.  She should get a more flattering and easy to manage hairstyle. 

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cereality

cereality

(edited)

Super interesting that G&K had some of their camera/sound guys from UP over at the house and posted a whole video montage of it. They are very clearly pitching another show, which is all the more interesting when Whit said recently that the show was Z's parents' show but they'd let us know if anything was brewing. I mean Law and Tiff came in from Nashville; warring factions Erin and Whit are both there; Tori is there and she hardly participates in these kinds of things; the younger kids look less feral; Isiah is in a freaking suit?? And some of their "fellowshipping" was held at Tori's house. Guaranteed they are trying to get a Counting On kind of spin off - ok we'll leave off the couples that are racist [uh all of them?] but look at all this interesting stuff our married couples are doing [uh making babies], and look we can't be racist, we have an Asian DIL. Interesting to beg your camera and sound guys for a show? Like they have authority regarding production decisions?

Hate to say it it also screams a bit like -- look look we can't be racist, we had these black guys over to our house and our kids and grandkids were paying with them. Though maybe don't caption it "some of the guys we've learned to love."

Noticeably Carlin and Evan aren't there. Major FOMO over there I'm sure. I kind of wonder if the family - while keeping sweet/spouting God's will - blames Carlin for the cancelation of the show. Not the racist who laughed about George Floyd [Trace], but the one who filmed and posted it and then did a non apology [Carlin].

Edited by cereality
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Salacious Kitty

Salacious Kitty

How would UP rebrand the show? Go the Duggar route and focus bc on the married kids? That might be tough given that it's been confirmed several times that this is Gil's baby. Is he stuffing his kids like JB did, or are they getting paid? 

I only saw one reel of the kid boxing with a crew member. Was there any evidence that this was being filmed?

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Cinnabon

Cinnabon

(edited)
52 minutes ago, Jeanne222 said:

I figured they would get another show. Just like the Duggers got Counting on!

 It was just a matter of time!

I don’t think it’s going to happen. Sounds like they hired the crew themselves. Whatever caused UP to drop them will eventually come out .

Edited by Cinnabon
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SMama

SMama

Gil was once asked about compensation for the sons who worked with him when he had the tree business. He said they got a cot to sleep on and three squares. He obviously felt he was being generous. This is why I never thought he shared the show income with his adult kids.  There certainly were perks and freebies but I doubt they saw any money. 

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Salacious Kitty

Salacious Kitty

4 minutes ago, SMama said:

Gil was once asked about compensation for the sons who worked with him when he had the tree business. He said they got a cot to sleep on and three squares. He obviously felt he was being generous. This is why I never thought he shared the show income with his adult kids.  There certainly were perks and freebies but I doubt they saw any money. 

Wow, I never heard that about Gil and the tree business. What an asshole. 

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Heathen

Heathen

24 minutes ago, Salacious Kitty said:

Wow, I never heard that about Gil and the tree business. What an asshole. 

Not surprising, though. This is, after all, the guy who quit a decent job with insurance to be a tree trimmer, sans insurance, while sticking the local ER with unpaid medical bills for basic healthcare for the huge family he clearly could not afford. In other words, in Gil's worldview, it's revolving around him. Kelly's too. 

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Absolom

Absolom

(edited)
26 minutes ago, Salacious Kitty said:

Oh dear, that's hideous.

Exactly what I was going to type.  That's just a no and where did she find it so I can avoid the store.

Oh she was modeling Bates' Cheapwear?  I thought that's what she'd worn to the reveal.  Still hideous.

Edited by Absolom
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Meow Mix

Meow Mix

On 8/30/2022 at 10:21 PM, SMama said:

Gil was once asked about compensation for the sons who worked with him when he had the tree business. He said they got a cot to sleep on and three squares. He obviously felt he was being generous. This is why I never thought he shared the show income with his adult kids.  There certainly were perks and freebies but I doubt they saw any money. 

Sounds like prison to me.  Gil is a creep.

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SMama

SMama

KJ and G don’t even bother to pretend they are caring for the minors at home. Jud and Jeb are in Michigan with Michael. Callie drove back to Nashville with Tiffany and Lawson, and Addie is in Arkansas as a baby helper.  I would not be surprised if Ellie was dispatched to Florida to be a sister mom to Alyssa’s girls.

When do these kids go to school? My HS sophomore was doing homework last night until 8 p.m., and has homework M-F. She is in honors classes, but damn, even regular HS work should keep the teens somewhat busy.

Callie is such a cutie and a workhorse. That little girl not only became a nanny for Carlin and Evan (and looked exhausted), but did some serious cleaning when Lydia and Trace were getting their duplex done. I hope if she’s staying with T&L that they spoil her senseless and allow her to be a little girl. Kelly and Gil are despicable. 

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BitterApple

BitterApple

(edited)

Tiffany seems cool and didn't grow up in a family where children were turned into indentured servants, so I imagine time at her house would be fun. She strikes me as a little lonely and wanting a buddy, not a lazy grifter like Alyssa who just wants to dump her responsibilities on someone else. Will it change when she has kids? Time will tell, but I'll give her the benefit of the doubt for now. 

I agree K&G don't even keep up a pretense about homeschooling anymore. It's sad their youngest group of children are like quasi-orphans, being shuffled around to various foster parents. 

Edited by BitterApple
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Heathen

Heathen

22 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

This is one reason why humans shouldn't have litters of children - it'll be 40 years between the birth of Zach and Jeb's 18th birthday. I'm not making excuses for K&G, as they are the idiots who had 19 kids, but as a parent myself I can't imagine raising (I know, I know) kids for 40 freaking years.

My great-grandparents had thirteen kids. The oldest and youngest were 27 years, nine months apart. Do that math! When the youngest child was born, there were already 12+ grandchildren, including a seven-year-old. 

Topic: I hate seeing girls work so hard while their brothers get to goof off and do fun stuff like go on trips. It's not exclusive to fundies, though -- when they visited their mother, my mother and her sisters would end up cooking and being helpful while their lazy POS brothers watched football, but the lazy ones got all the attention and praise. And my grandmother was not a fundie. I think it was the same in her family of origin, too. 

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ozziemom

ozziemom

1 hour ago, Heathen said:

My great-grandparents had thirteen kids. The oldest and youngest were 27 years, nine months apart. Do that math! When the youngest child was born, there were already 12+ grandchildren, including a seven-year-old. 

Topic: I hate seeing girls work so hard while their brothers get to goof off and do fun stuff like go on trips. It's not exclusive to fundies, though -- when they visited their mother, my mother and her sisters would end up cooking and being helpful while their lazy POS brothers watched football, but the lazy ones got all the attention and praise. And my grandmother was not a fundie. I think it was the same in her family of origin, too. 

I think we might be cousins. This sounds just like my maternal family. Not Fundie but my grandmother often said “my boy, my joy” and the boys could do no wrong.

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andromeda331

andromeda331

3 hours ago, Heathen said:

My great-grandparents had thirteen kids. The oldest and youngest were 27 years, nine months apart. Do that math! When the youngest child was born, there were already 12+ grandchildren, including a seven-year-old. 

Topic: I hate seeing girls work so hard while their brothers get to goof off and do fun stuff like go on trips. It's not exclusive to fundies, though -- when they visited their mother, my mother and her sisters would end up cooking and being helpful while their lazy POS brothers watched football, but the lazy ones got all the attention and praise. And my grandmother was not a fundie. I think it was the same in her family of origin, too. 

The girls really get  a raw deal.

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AgathaC

AgathaC

3 hours ago, ozziemom said:

I think we might be cousins. This sounds just like my maternal family. Not Fundie but my grandmother often said “my boy, my joy” and the boys could do no wrong.

Ugh. That sort of attitude drives me nuts. But then I’m from an all-girl immediate family and had to put up with the “still trying for a boy, huh?” and “your poor dad” jokes. So I’m a little sensitive. (I guess it helped a little that my paternal family, which is boy-heavy, tended to lean the other way and coddle the girls.)

My nephew was the first grandchild and first boy for my parents’ line and I was a little worried. I was heartened to see that as he got older, whenever he tried to be lazy or get his younger sisters to wait on him, he was firmly told by both parents to do it himself.

I knew a family growing up that favored their boy to the point that one girl exaggerated her asthma and the other one regularly failed classes in school, solely for attention. Sad.

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Salacious Kitty

Salacious Kitty

33 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

I'm sorry to hear about Kelly's mother. She seemed really frail even before she got COVID. Not to sound callous, but I'm shocked she made it through that. Kelly didn't seem particularly concerned about her, so I'm wondering what the history is there. 

Well, reading Kelly's IG post, one would think she was the most devoted of daughters. Her mother was much ignored, as far as I could tell, in favor of the more holy Papa Bill and Mama Jane. 

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Heathen

Heathen

57 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

I'm sorry to hear about Kelly's mother. She seemed really frail even before she got COVID. Not to sound callous, but I'm shocked she made it through that. Kelly didn't seem particularly concerned about her, so I'm wondering what the history is there. 

Kelly comes across as incredibly self-centered anyway.

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BitterApple

BitterApple

9 hours ago, Heathen said:

Kelly comes across as incredibly self-centered anyway.

Yeah, I love how she managed to get a plug in for Lawson's and Erin's CD's in the middle of her tribute. 🙄

It doesn't seem the kids were that close to their grandmother either. Only Michael and Alyssa have posted about her passing, although in fairness it's still early. 

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ginger90

ginger90

Kelly’s post:

My mom went to the ER on Saturday with RSV, but sadly her lungs got much worse by Mon. night & her health began to decline rapidly. Early this morning she went to be with the Lord.💔😭 She always said she didn’t want to die alone, & we filled her room with so much love these past few days… All of her children, plus her 2 siblings gathered & sat by her bedside. Mom was able to respond to us the majority of the time; she kept smiling, waving, blowing kisses, & squeezing our hands. She asked me again & again to keep the music playing that her grandkids had made, so we played piano music with Scripture readings from Erin’s new cd, along with many songs from Lawson’s & Travis’ cds… Mom loved her children, grandchildren, & her great grand children! She loved bragging on them, like any grandmother, & she lit up when they entered the room! She had such a fun side, & she loved embarrassing us! Many times, I would show up to a church party or school event to see her dressed up as some crazy character, sitting right in the middle of my friends, mingling & telling stories, & of course, I’d be surprised & embarrassed all at the same time, but she was such a hit with all of my friends! They loved her outgoing personality! She was also full of wisdom, I’ve learned so much from her over the years that have affected my perspective on things. She had so many great tidbits of advice! I will always be grateful for the impact she had on molding me into the person I am today. There’s no way to tell how greatly she will be missed! It was a hard day, a painful day, a tear-filled day as her health faded & we sat through the night saying our goodbyes!This evening, as I sat with my sisters in the funeral home, we hugged & smiled as we told story after story, reflecting on memories! Mom, we will always remember your spunky, fun personality! We will always remember your diligence, your sacrifice, the late night card games, the tuna fish gravy (🙈😂 that’s for you, Brenda!), & so so so many special memories! You will be forever missed 😭😭 & forever loved!

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