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Love Fraud - General Discussion


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22 minutes ago, Tachi Rocinante said:

Haven't watched this one yet, but I am hooked on The Vow on HBO, which is a documentary about the NXIVM cult.

Can we get a category for that one?

I’m watching that one as well. So creepy.

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I'm watching both also.  Love Fraud pisses me off on one hand and scares the crap out of me on the other.  I've got three daughters, two of which were all about dating apps and the like, no matter what I said to dissuade them. 

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On 9/5/2020 at 5:41 PM, LuvizBlind said:

I've got three daughters, two of which were all about dating apps and the like, no matter what I said to dissuade them. 

That's pretty much how people meet these days.  And what the guy in this series did isn't because of online dating.  In fact, the woman* who emptied out her husband's 401K to buy a restaurant with Smith met him in a karaoke bar.  He started putting the moves on one of his employees next except she was smart enough to realize the immediate I love yous was creepy.

Online dating was just one of the methods he used to find women he could scam. 

I know Kara said she wanted love an affection in the way she didn't get from her husband, Jim, but the fact that Jim seems to have stuck it out with her is love. 

 

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1 hour ago, anniebird said:

In my culinary experience, Krab (with a K) means imitation crab so who, in their right mind, would eat at a restaurant called Krab Kingz? In Wichita Kansas?

According to that employee who was interviewed, EVERYONE needed that seafood in Wichita! I loved that one of her motivations for applying was so she could get free seafood. At least she was honest about her motivation! Mickey/Richard/Scott mentioned to Karla that the only competition in town was Red Lobster so I guess there aren't a lot of seafood restaurants in Wichita (you know, because they aren't near a major body of water).

I loved that the radio show talking about the new restaurant made sure to note that it was Krab with a K and Kingz with a Z. Those two things should tell you everything you need to know about the restaurant. I am very lucky that I live in California so we can get fresh seafood, but it has turned me into somewhat of a paranoid snob because, like you, I immediately wondered where the hell they were getting their Krab and shrimp in the middle of Kansas.

Mr. EB and I pronounce "krab" as k-rab just to differentiate between actual crab.

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16 hours ago, Irlandesa said:

That's pretty much how people meet these days.  And what the guy in this series did isn't because of online dating.  In fact, the woman* who emptied out her husband's 401K to buy a restaurant with Smith met him in a karaoke bar.  He started putting the moves on one of his employees next except she was smart enough to realize the immediate I love yous was creepy.

Online dating was just one of the methods he used to find women he could scam. 

I know Kara said she wanted love an affection in the way she didn't get from her husband, Jim, but the fact that Jim seems to have stuck it out with her is love. 

 

I get that he met some in other ways; but he also typically had online profiles on various web sites and apps.  Not EVERY woman he was involved with or F'd over is featured in this documentary.  I did a bit of dive into the background on this jerk.  And yeah, it also sucks that the one woman featured screwed over her husband for the sociopath; but he also took her back...  There's all kinds of screwed up people out there; and I am not sorry I watched over my daughters and what they were doing, especially on-line.  They are all happy, healthy and in a great marriage or relationship now.  They have also recounted  about how some of their friends got seriously hurt and/or harmed by not being careful with the online thing.  ymmv

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15 hours ago, Armchair Critic said:

Ironically Karla Krab Kingz was bad at karaoke.

When her husband said that she started going to karaoke and then got obsessed with it, I thought she was going to be this amazing singer. I was disappointed when it turned out that she was just this side of "not tone deaf."

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This has been an interesting season. It could be so easy to be taken in by a confidence man (or woman). They target the vulnerable and naive on purpose. They can just smell desperation. It's so sad he was able to con all these women.

Also, I really like the graphics!

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I was just shaking my head at that message he left for one of the women saying that HE was hurting too, that it wasn't fair for her to hang up on him when he called, and that he deserved a second chance. Even if he was talking to someone who he hadn't hit in the face with an ipad, just the attitude of entitlement was making me mad. I am hurting! I deserve a second chance! ME ME ME! Marcia Marcia Marcia!

I was actually surprised that he changed his attitude toward her before getting her to buy a house or a car for him first. I loved that she told him that she was going to leave him. Finally! But then I was shocked that instead of trying to sweet talk her, he got violent. That doesn't seem like his usual MO so I wonder what snapped. Maybe his fragile ego couldn't handle a woman who wasn't fawning all over him.

Hahaha, to be honest, Lee lost all credibility with her one short comment on the blog. No comma before "ladies" and a space before an exclamation point? Clearly I can't trust someone with such terrible grammar skills to have good judgment (I'm only partially kidding). And she's not smart enough to be a good liar. What kind of a person talks to their ex FOUR TIMES A WEEK but expects people to believe that she doesn't know where he is? Okay, Jan. Like why even admit that you talk to him that often? Her lame lie would have been a lot more plausible if she had just said she hadn't talked to him for a while.

And there are two sides to every story? I'd love to hear his explanation for being a bigamist. Her complete denial about what he's been doing was sad and similar to what you hear from friends/family members of other abusers/rapists/murderers: "he didn't do it to me so it can't be true!" I just finished watching I'll Be Gone in the Dark (about the Golden State Killer). He raped at least 50 women and murdered 13 people. His family never suspected. Using Lee's logic, there's no way that the GSK raped or killed anyone (despite the DNA evidence and his confession).

As for her explanation about how before she met him, she had just gotten divorced, her life was boring, and she had been a recluse so going out with him meant she got to dress up again, I wanted to shake her. Listen, you are a grown ass adult. You don't have to meet a man to dress up, go out, and have some fun. I feel pity for women whose personalities are all wrapped up in being someone's wife/girlfriend. You can live a full happy life without being in a relationship with someone! Go out with your friends! Go take art classes! Travel! Learn some new skills! You don't need a man to do any of those things!

Despite saying that their breakup was amicable, it was clear to me that she was still in love with him and would take him back (if they weren't still together).

If you believe his story about his dad leaving, remarrying multiple times, and having lots of kids while his mom beat him, then why would he want to emulate someone who he thought treated him like shit?

Really sad that he took advantage of his own family members: lying to girlfriends about his sister being his daughter, berating said sister for being trailer trash that would never become anything, and tricking his family into giving him power of attorney for his uncle so that he could steal his house.

OMG I laughed so hard when Lee's boyfriend Darryl wanted to help as soon as the producers contacted him and said, "This shit is crazy!" Good for him for recognizing Richard/Scott/whatever the fuck name he's using as a conman.

I totally cracked up when one of the detectives said that the rearview mirror in Richard's car was positioned so that he could look at himself. Not only is that convenient so that he wouldn't notice he was being followed, but WHAT A SURPRISE that this narcissist loves looking at himself. I remember ages ago, I read an article where someone was described as someone so self involved that he probably stared at himself in the mirror while masturbating.

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I had a guy try to swindle me (luckily I didn’t get in as deep as these women) and all I feel is ticked. Some of these women still crying over him I am suspicious would take him back.

WTF Lee? She said she was a professional on top and a hooker on the bottom like Heather Locklear on Melrose Place?! She seems like an alcoholic (still watching and I was right).

No offense but these women all look rough for their age.

OMG they spotted him. Lee you liar.

And he is at the bar with another woman... 🙄

Edited by Armchair Critic
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18 hours ago, ElectricBoogaloo said:

As for her explanation about how before she met him, she had just gotten divorced, her life was boring, and she had been a recluse so going out with him meant she got to dress up again, I wanted to shake her. Listen, you are a grown ass adult. You don't have to meet a man to dress up, go out, and have some fun. I feel pity for women whose personalities are all wrapped up in being someone's wife/girlfriend. You can live a full happy life without being in a relationship with someone! Go out with your friends! Go take art classes! Travel! Learn some new skills! You don't need a man to do any of those things!

 

 

There's a difference though . . . I mean, I'm divorced and I am looking hard for someone to be in a relationship with. I know I can have a perfectly fine life without a man. I know that's possible. I have friends I go out with. I have traveled with friends. I take lessons in things that interest me. I volunteer with groups. But you know, sex. Kissing. Cuddling. Physical intimacy. I hate it when friends are like "You don't need a man!" - I know I don't NEED a man. I'd like a man to have regular sex with. Plus, I have learned this year that when the shit hits the fan and you're knee deep in a global pandemic, a bunch of tertiary friends aren't going to come over and spoon you on the couch. So I don't really think there's anything wrong when people say "I would like to feel physically intimate with someone who cares about me" which is all that people are saying when they mention wanting a significant other. A friend is great. I have plenty of friends. But they fill very different roles in your life.

That being said, I'm not so lonely or desperate that I miss red flags. Being online with a bunch of apps, most of the time people are just out there trying their best to find someone. But there have been a few instances of guys who set off all of my warning bells. They try to move too fast, too soon. They are very effusive. It always sets off my spidey sense when they're like "You are stunning!" - Sir, I am cute on a good day. Simma down a bit please. I had one guy who was so effusive so quickly. Non-stop compliments and declarations that he felt like we had SO much in common. Looked him up on our state's casenet and he had a listing a mile long for stalking and domestic abuse. And he had said he was divorced for two years but according to the courts, he had only been divorced for one week when he reached out to me. Another guy kept changing the time we were meeting and where we were meeting. A tiny bit of digging after the date revealed that he was still living with his girlfriend. Hadn't moved out. Hadn't broken up.

So I don't think it's bad to want someone in your life romantically. But you have to do due diligence. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. If they're coming on super strong, be wary. Google is your friend and public records are illuminating. There's no way I'd get engaged to someone or give him any money at all if I hadn't met any of his friends or family or done a records search on him. 

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4 hours ago, EdnasEdibles said:

There's a difference though . . . I mean, I'm divorced and I am looking hard for someone to be in a relationship with. I know I can have a perfectly fine life without a man. I know that's possible. I have friends I go out with. I have traveled with friends. I take lessons in things that interest me. I volunteer with groups. But you know, sex. Kissing. Cuddling. Physical intimacy. I hate it when friends are like "You don't need a man!" - I know I don't NEED a man. I'd like a man to have regular sex with. Plus, I have learned this year that when the shit hits the fan and you're knee deep in a global pandemic, a bunch of tertiary friends aren't going to come over and spoon you on the couch. So I don't really think there's anything wrong when people say "I would like to feel physically intimate with someone who cares about me" which is all that people are saying when they mention wanting a significant other. A friend is great. I have plenty of friends. But they fill very different roles in your life.

That being said, I'm not so lonely or desperate that I miss red flags. Being online with a bunch of apps, most of the time people are just out there trying their best to find someone. But there have been a few instances of guys who set off all of my warning bells. They try to move too fast, too soon. They are very effusive. It always sets off my spidey sense when they're like "You are stunning!" - Sir, I am cute on a good day. Simma down a bit please. I had one guy who was so effusive so quickly. Non-stop compliments and declarations that he felt like we had SO much in common. Looked him up on our state's casenet and he had a listing a mile long for stalking and domestic abuse. And he had said he was divorced for two years but according to the courts, he had only been divorced for one week when he reached out to me. Another guy kept changing the time we were meeting and where we were meeting. A tiny bit of digging after the date revealed that he was still living with his girlfriend. Hadn't moved out. Hadn't broken up.

So I don't think it's bad to want someone in your life romantically. But you have to do due diligence. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. If they're coming on super strong, be wary. Google is your friend and public records are illuminating. There's no way I'd get engaged to someone or give him any money at all if I hadn't met any of his friends or family or done a records search on him. 

There's nothing wrong with wanting physical intimacy/sex/cuddling or a romantic partner (I never said there was anything wrong with wanting that). What set my alarms off with Lee was that she said her life was boring, she was a recluse, and she didn't dress up/go out until Scott/Rick/Love Fraud guy came into her life. Based on what she said, she wasn't doing anything to bring happiness or fulfillment or any activity outside of her house until he came alone and THAT is what I had an issue with.

Living a full life isn't reserved for when you find a boyfriend, which seemed to be her attitude. She said that once he came along, they went out all the time and she had a reason to dress up which is ridiculous. You can go out to restaurants, movies, plays, concerts, or hell just the local bars without a boyfriend. You can have fun without a boyfriend. You can wear cute outfits without a boyfriend. But she said she didn't do any of that stuff between her divorce and when she started dating Mr. Love Fraud. To me, that sounds like someone whose self worth is too wrapped up in having a man in her life. It's not a boyfriend's responsibility to make your life stop being boring or to give you a reason to dress up, but she chose not to do anything until she had a man to take her places which I find sad. She needs to learn how to take responsibility for her own life and her own happiness instead of waiting for some guy to show up on her doorstep to sweep her off her feet and fix everything in her life. And on the flip side, what kind of guy is going to think, "Ooh, a depressed shut in who never leaves the house - I've found my soulmate"? Someone like this guy who wants to take advantage of the situation.

Thank goodness you have a good BS alarm (and you know to google people!). There are too many people out there who are liars and will try to hide the truth about their lives and relationships. I want to believe people are telling the truth, but if you can find information that contradicts their stories with a simple google search then what else are they hiding? On the other hand, it's good that some of these liars are too stupid to cover their own tracks. Makes it easier to find out the truth quickly!

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I see what you mean. Yes. It's a good distinction. I still go out plenty without a man and enjoy dressing up and having fun even if I'm not dating anyone. I'd just prefer to be dating someone - ha! But yes, there are a lot of people who don't know how to function without a significant other. I remember there was an episode of How I Met Your Mother where one character broke up with his long term girlfriend and was sad about not going out to brunch and his friends were like "You do know you can get brunch with other people, right?" 

I really do believe that the majority of people online are looking for love. Or sex. But at least they're honest. But there is a small percentage that have terrible intentions. And those guys can sniff it out.

There was a case here that hit our weekly of a man who was swindling money out of women and money out of a grieving dad by saying he was going to make a documentary about his son. He's a pretty cute guy too. I went to college with him. He'd be a great season 2 of Love Fraud. But a simple google search would uncover so much about this guy. 

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On 9/7/2020 at 3:47 PM, anniebird said:

In my culinary experience, Krab (with a K) means imitation crab so who, in their right mind, would eat at a restaurant called Krab Kingz? In Wichita Kansas?

I used to live a couple of blocks from where that Krab Kingz was in Wichita, but a couple of decades before it was there.  The location had a lot of turnover - we'd just get to try a restaurant (whatever was there), and decide we'd go back, and it closed!

When we moved from Nebraska to Virginia, I joked that I was moving to where I could get crab instead of settling for krab. 😉

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I think Krab Kingz is a franchise. We have one near me and there was (or might still be?) one about 10 minutes away. I went once for take-out. It's not bad. Very salty. It's very "crab boil" where you get a big aluminum tray filled with crab legs, corn, potatoes. It's all covered in salty seasoning and you get butter on the side. Its not terrible but not my favorite. Not fancy at all. But also not really cheap. 

I could not believe he convinced the one Krab Kingz lady that the owner wasn't his girlfriend but that she was just obsessed with him and the other Krab Kingz lady dated him. For like 3 days. And they had a ton of selfies together in their three day relationship. I was side eyeing that lady. And the owner. Why would you stand for this? Good lord. HE ISN'T EVEN CUTE. 

Edited by EdnasEdibles
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I watched episode 3 today.  It’s an interesting program, but it seems like everything is drug out, and with long lingering shots of buildings and landscapes that do nothing to move the story along.  These 4 episodes could probably have been completed and the story done in 2 or 3 episodes. Of course I haven’t see the 4th episode yet.

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Mesmerizing show. I binged 3 episodes today. 

How is it that I can't miss a stop sign without getting caught, but people like him can commit endless felonies for years without getting caught. Or get probation when they do? It's insane, like they live in an alternate universe. 

Years ago, truly by accident, I passed a school bus. By the time I realized it, it was too late so I kept going, feeling guilty. Next day out of nowhere, the police called my house and I was hit with a huge fine, deservedly so. Another time I was driving home with a car full of children, one crying loudly, and went a bit over the speed limit. Pulled over. Big fine. 

Again, alternate universe. 

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I currently live in Wichita on the same street where Krab Kingz was located. Yes i ate there a handful of times with my best friend who loved the place. 

Tbh it was a crummy experience. The waitress spilled the tray of drinks on us, came back to tell us they were now out of syrup for my soda. Someone was right when they said the only other shellfish option in town is red lobster. If you're brave you could find sub par crab and shrimp at an all you can eat Chinese buffet. 

Every time I drove by the restaurant on my way to work I would shutter at the name. Krab with a k. Kingz with a z. Gimme a break. And my money back. And your husbands money back. 

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I can't believe he only got 6 months for all the crap he pulled, including bigamy. I knew he'd be up to his old tricks in no time and, lo, he was. At least it appears someone is still following him. I'm sorry to hear about Carla the Bounty Hunter. She is scrappy.

Lee's father is a very stupid old man. He was still defending Scott until they proved it was him who sunk the boat. Then he got mad. Over the boat, not over what he did to his daughter and other women. It's clear Lee had a very poor father figure, no wonder she went the way she did. Grr.

That was an interesting series. I'd like to know if Scott got caught again for his cons after the series wrapped.

Ah hah! Here's a follow-up article from Oprah: https://www.oprahmag.com/entertainment/a33915040/richard-scott-smith-love-fraud-now/

and a link to "the website" exposing him: http://scottthecrooksmith.weebly.com/

Edited by Ms Lark
Answering my own question.
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I'm also watching The Vow on HBO and in that thread we were talking what a colossal disappointment Keith (the cult leader) was in real life and how befuddling it is that he had so many followers.

That is exactly how I felt during the interview with Scott.  He gave me the willies and I can't believe he got so many women to open themselves up so fully to him.  Like...eww, that guy? 

I found myself laughing at his audacity to portray himself as a victim and who he compared himself to.  Oh goodness.

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13 hours ago, Irlandesa said:

That is exactly how I felt during the interview with Scott.  He gave me the willies and I can't believe he got so many women to open themselves up so fully to him.  Like...eww, that guy? 

Yes. I was so uncomfortable when he was facing the camera. He came across as so creepy and his facial tics, especially the winking, were unnerving. I don't think I would be able to get through 60 seconds talking to him so I couldn't believe so many women had fallen for him.

My favorite part of the interview was when he said he'd been married 5 times and the interviewer got him to admit to 5 more! A total of 10 times! His lie covered half of his marriages.

He's not wrong about who he compared himself to. That's another one who pretends to be religious and is unable to name one piece of scripture.

Edited by DoubleUTeeEff
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Agree with all who say they can’t figure out what was attractive enough about this man that he was able to date and marry multiple people.  He must be more charming in person.  He looks average at best and the crying and talking about how much he wants to be loved would be a big turn off. Oh well, there’s no accounting for taste.

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I am not confused at all that this guy was able to hook up with so many woman, even though he was a weasel.   I've watched many daytime court show and seen an endless parade of woman who will attach themselves with the skeeviest, crackheadiest, most worthless man just so they have someone in their bed.   They open their homes, their wallets and their beds to a halfway decent schmoe so they can be in a relationship and "nest". 

After the creep shows his real colors, like Scott does, that's usually when the woman goes to court to try to get her money/property/dignity back.  

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52 minutes ago, For Cereals said:

I agree, this could’ve been a Dateline episode.  Way too drawn out.

The plot could certainly have been told in an hour, but I enjoyed getting to know the various characters along the way. I have to say I was never bored. 

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OMG I just can't with this guy's level of delusion. When the interviewer asked if he wanted to say anything to the women on the blog, he said, "My life has been very, very difficult at every single turn which you created. I hope you're really satisfied and I hope you're happy with your results." Uhhhh, okay. Talk about a complete lack of ability to take responsibility for the choices he made and the things he did. I guess they made him marry multiple women! And how big of him to say he forgives them for what they did to him.

Boo hoo, he's always the victim. Characterizing the other women of getting together on martini night to think of ways to ruin his life just made me roll my eyes. When he was crying about how he wants to be on Facebook but he can't because everyone googles now, my reaction was oh STFU. If you aren't trying to hide all of your million wives and scams, then there's no reason why you can't be on Facebook.

Ha, I loved when the interviewer asked if he prayed and he claimed that he prays every day so she asked what his favorite scripture was and he couldn't name a single thing. I cracked up when he claimed he was "only" married to five women and then the interviewer started naming other women who he was married too and he admitted that he was married to all the others. "I didn't even realize I was married to two women at the same time - twice!" SURE, JAN. I absolutely love when liars get caught lying.

At least before the jailhouse interview, we were able to pretend/imagine that somehow he was this charming personable guy but the interview definitely dispelled that. He came off as someone who's very insincere but read some self-help blogs so that he can say what he thinks people want to hear. "I'm working on me." "I just want someone to love me." "I can only move forward."

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THIS WAS THE GUY THAT CHARMED ALL THESE WOMEN? Someone is playing a huge joke on us, right? You would think this guy had George Clooney level charm oozing out of every pore? I could barely get thru the 10 minute interview without feeling I needed a shower. The weird affectations he had, his puffy odd crooked lips, did anyone else feel a total gay vibe coming off of him (nothing wrong with being gay btw), I’m just saying for all these women to fall for him in DAYS enough to hand over money, leave their husbands, WHAT? This guy? I’m literally stumbling around my office mumbling “this is the guy?” and my coworkers are wondering what’s wrong with me. But I’m like so baffled I don’t know what to do, like Bermuda Triangle levels of baffled. If this guy conned me I’m not sure I would even admit it, he was the most charmless, unattractive, whiny weirdo I've seen in a long time. These women should invest in some hard core therapy because I can’t imagine on my lowest day thinking this guy was the answer to my prayers for a man (and I’ve been single a long time).

And because it can’t be said enough, THIS WAS THE GUY?

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On 9/22/2020 at 1:16 PM, sadie said:

THIS WAS THE GUY THAT CHARMED ALL THESE WOMEN? Someone is playing a huge joke on us, right? You would think this guy had George Clooney level charm oozing out of every pore? I could barely get thru the 10 minute interview without feeling I needed a shower. The weird affectations he had, his puffy odd crooked lips, did anyone else feel a total gay vibe coming off of him (nothing wrong with being gay btw), I’m just saying for all these women to fall for him in DAYS enough to hand over money, leave their husbands, WHAT? This guy? I’m literally stumbling around my office mumbling “this is the guy?” and my coworkers are wondering what’s wrong with me. But I’m like so baffled I don’t know what to do, like Bermuda Triangle levels of baffled. If this guy conned me I’m not sure I would even admit it, he was the most charmless, unattractive, whiny weirdo I've seen in a long time. These women should invest in some hard core therapy because I can’t imagine on my lowest day thinking this guy was the answer to my prayers for a man (and I’ve been single a long time).

And because it can’t be said enough, THIS WAS THE GUY?

I agree! He is so creepy, his whole face looks ...crooked? I was expecting a Ted Bundy type but this guy looks like a serial killer. This is probably the reason why he didn't get away with too much money. Textbook sociopath, always the victim, nothing is ever his fault. Did he compare himself to Donald Trump? I can't with this crazy asshole. I mean, he oozes crazy...women fell for this !?!?! Really !?!?!?

Edited by sainte-chapelle
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15 hours ago, sainte-chapelle said:

I agree! He is so creepy, his whole face looks ...crooked? I was expecting a Ted Bundy type but this guy looks like a serial killer. This is probably the reason why he didn't get away with too much money. Textbook sociopath, always the victim, nothing is ever his fault. Did he compare himself to Donald Trump? I can't with this crazy asshole. I mean, he oozes crazy...women fell for this !?!?! Really !?!?!?

I feel like I'm 50% ewwwww and then 50%  . . . I get it.

OK, so to illustrate. I'm in my mid-40s. I live in the midwest. I divorced a few years ago. I've been trying to date. So far this year: A 50 year old man who told me that I was too old. A 42 year old man who has never been married and never had kids and isn't ready for a commitment after ending a relationship 3 years ago. A 40 year old attorney who told me that he usually only dates women in their 20s. I did not hear from him again. A 40 year old man who spent the entire first date complaining about how his ex-wife is a "whore" who cheated on him. I did not contact him. A 43 year old man who's been divorced for 5 years, also mentioned his ex was in her 20s. Spent a month dating him and then he finally ghosted me and I wrote him to be like "What's going on" and he told me that he felt no chemistry with me. And a 45 year old man who lied about how many times he's been married. Lied about whether he smokes (which I wouldn't care about the smoking but I care about the lying). I'm getting a general bad feeling about him and can't put my finger on it so I'm going to end it. 

So that's what's out there. With the last guy, he's OK looking. He has a job. He's been attentive but not too attentive. He's been a little over the top though. A little too faux humble. A little too "aww shucks, you're pretty" in a way that rings false. I am in a cranky mood lately so I dont' feel like dealing with it. But, I absolutely have been spending way too many days trying to figure out if I should bother or if I'm being too picky? Or what? So I kind of get it. You go out. You try. Society keeps telling you that you're old and middle aged and past your prime. And I weigh more than I did the last time I was single. I have stretch marks and scars that weren't there in my 20s. I'm lonely. Friends tell me I'm being too picky. So I doubt myself. 

I can see how someone would doubt themselves enough to overlook the issues. And if you're really vulnerable and hurt . . . I don't know. I can't see it and yet . . . I can. 

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2 hours ago, EdnasEdibles said:

I feel like I'm 50% ewwwww and then 50%  . . . I get it.

OK, so to illustrate. I'm in my mid-40s. I live in the midwest. I divorced a few years ago. I've been trying to date. So far this year: A 50 year old man who told me that I was too old. A 42 year old man who has never been married and never had kids and isn't ready for a commitment after ending a relationship 3 years ago. A 40 year old attorney who told me that he usually only dates women in their 20s. I did not hear from him again. A 40 year old man who spent the entire first date complaining about how his ex-wife is a "whore" who cheated on him. I did not contact him. A 43 year old man who's been divorced for 5 years, also mentioned his ex was in her 20s. Spent a month dating him and then he finally ghosted me and I wrote him to be like "What's going on" and he told me that he felt no chemistry with me. And a 45 year old man who lied about how many times he's been married. Lied about whether he smokes (which I wouldn't care about the smoking but I care about the lying). I'm getting a general bad feeling about him and can't put my finger on it so I'm going to end it. 

So that's what's out there. With the last guy, he's OK looking. He has a job. He's been attentive but not too attentive. He's been a little over the top though. A little too faux humble. A little too "aww shucks, you're pretty" in a way that rings false. I am in a cranky mood lately so I dont' feel like dealing with it. But, I absolutely have been spending way too many days trying to figure out if I should bother or if I'm being too picky? Or what? So I kind of get it. You go out. You try. Society keeps telling you that you're old and middle aged and past your prime. And I weigh more than I did the last time I was single. I have stretch marks and scars that weren't there in my 20s. I'm lonely. Friends tell me I'm being too picky. So I doubt myself. 

I can see how someone would doubt themselves enough to overlook the issues. And if you're really vulnerable and hurt . . . I don't know. I can't see it and yet . . . I can. 

Yea I can see that. I have single friends in their 40's and even though I live in a large city dating is very difficult. My friend is currently dating a man who is 'separated ' but there are red flags. She is willingto  ignore them because she feels she is being overly suspicious 

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On 9/22/2020 at 1:16 PM, sadie said:

The weird affectations he had, his puffy odd crooked lips, did anyone else feel a total gay vibe coming off of him (nothing wrong with being gay btw), I’m just saying for all these women to fall for him in DAYS enough to hand over money, leave their husbands, WHAT? This guy?

You're not the only one. As we were watching his interview and he offered up some sad sack excuse I literally shouted at the tv: "Maybe because you're gay!" And I say this as a gay person. 

But overall add me to the list of people thinking, "Him, really? HIM???" I failed to see even an ounce of charisma in the guy.

And his prison sentence was an absolute joke. 

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Me at my TV during Scott's jail interview:

giphy.gif

Dude is a straight up PSYCHO. 

Didn't surprise me at all he found some other idiot to prey on. 

 

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On 9/13/2020 at 8:26 PM, Armchair Critic said:

WTF Lee? . . . She seems like an alcoholic

Lee is an alcoholic, imo, which would explain her deluded judgement.

 

On 9/28/2020 at 6:49 AM, MicheleinPhilly said:

WHAT? This guy?

Biggest surprise of the series. I too felt a gay vibe. Unless this dude changed drastically throughout the time, I cannot fathom anyone doing anything but running away from this guy. Like someone said before, anyone that says I love you so quickly, followed immediately by: lets buy stuff, lets get married, how about putting me on all of your financials, has got to be a predator. Very depressing to see such desperation in women that should know better.

Who was this guy talking to on the phone all the time? New targets?  

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On 9/13/2020 at 5:59 AM, Ms Lark said:

Also, I really like the graphics!

I thought the directors, Heidi Ewing and Rachel Grady (Jesus Camp, Detropia), did an excellent job of telling this story from multiple perspectives. I too loved the graphics (ILLUSTRATOR-Martin O’Neill, ANIMATION-Andrew Griffin).

What he did to his family was more disturbing than how he used the women. 

I've only come across one sociopath in real life, neighbor. Mistook him for your average dick. Surprisingly, up close and personal you can tell something is seriously wrong with them. After seeing his interview, I am having a difficult time seeing anything close to a Player.

Edited by itsadryheat
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Discussion of the Showtime Love Fraud episodes on YouTube (by Donna Andersen of love fraud.com)

Episode 1: 10 truths & 1 scary fallacy: https://youtu.be/ahZwOfGM7aM

Episode 2: Sociopaths target our dreams: https://youtu.be/sQZo3WbFcYY

Episode 3: Explaining sociopaths: Nature & nurture: https://youtu.be/RnKgdGW5g0c

Podcast      https://www.realcrimeprofile.com/

Sept 2 Discussing Love Fraud Episode 1: Husbands & Wives 

Sept 9 Discussing Love Fraud Episode 2: Karla and the Krab Kingz 

Sept 16 Discussing Love Fraud Episode 3: Lovebombing & Lee

Sept 23 Discussing Love Fraud Episode 4: Catch and Release

Edited by itsadryheat
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I thought this could have been a tight 2 hours but him having his ass handed to him in that final interview in prison was legit one of the most satisfying endings I have ever seen for one of these multi-part docuseries. The questioning over the marriages chef’s kiss! And the follow up to his waxing about how he loves the Bible and has been reading it with “what’s your favorite passage” and the panicked look in the eye with no answer was also lovely! 

Edited by biakbiak
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