Getting to Genoa You All Over Again: Y&R Daily Chat

[MsMalin]

18 hours ago, Waldo13 said:

Natey Nate Nate you are already working side by side with Cruella. You are also working inside Cruella

 

[Rye]

Summer hit a new low today, making a child feel bad about saying it’s wrong to let your family think you’re dead. What a b!tch.

Jack canonizing Diane for admitting she’s done bad things made me throw up in my mouth a little bit.

What’s the over/under on Audra playing recordings of Nate to Cruella to play innocent bystander and take Nate’s job?

[Joimiaroxeu]

I happened to catch the opening scene with Nikki and Victoria and noticed how much slimmer MTS is. Even her face looked thinner to me. Hope she's okay.

[peacheslatour]

I thought Diane was dead? I thought Nikki and Deacon killed her in the park?

[Rye]

2 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

I thought Diane was dead? I thought Nikki and Deacon killed her in the park?

 

[peacheslatour]

Oh dear. Have I stepped on it now?

[Rye]

4 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

Oh dear. Have I stepped on it now?

Honestly I took several years off from this show, so I can’t even give you the specifics. But Diane faked her own death apparently, then resurfaced a couple years ago to reunite with Kyle. 

[One Tough Cookie]

I'm half way thru this epi and all I can say is; i freaking love Tucker.  

His facial expressions are great!

I'll have a mini Fashion Update when I finish watching.

[MsMalin]

Remember how hot Show was on podcasts? CW was going to have 50+! 

Now I guess we have heard the last of them since Elena quit hers. What is it with this show? Bring up ideas hot and heavy then totally drop them.

Edited May 25, 2023 by MsMalin

[One Tough Cookie]

I like Jack, but the make up people make him way too orange IMO.

I wanted to smack the crap out of Dummer. Bouffant Boy was no better.  Recast, please.

I thought Megan Markle's dress looked great on her-the colors really complimented her coloring.

Ashley looked good in aubergine, but I wish she'd tone down the blonde.

I like Victoria's dress, but I am a dark color dresser black,navy,etc, but I would have worn pearls or something.  She looked rather severe, like a librarian.  

Yeah, Imma bitch.

[Joimiaroxeu]

Nikki, what was giving Victoria that glow was the facial Nate gave her earlier. Nate's not an aesthetician. Think about it. 😏

So Harrison is going to attend day camp at Camp Wildwind. Is he going to take the Jabot jet every day because as I recall, that camp is in Pennsylvania. Erica Kane got married on the Wildwind estate at least once. (I see you, JG. 😉)

Ashley's boobage was awfully perky today.

Guess Audra graduated to Tucker's old suite when he moved in with Ashley.

Nate is such an egomaniac he has no clue how easily Audra is working him wrt their advancement opportunities at NE/NM. Moron.

Victoria is pushing 50, right? She has to be old enough to have relationships without her mommy's approval. Besides, even Nikki doesn't realize what a snake Nate is.

Ashley, "mother and grandmother of Abbott children" beats "fake fiance of a non-biological Abbott" any day of the week. Shut up. You're actually terrified of a woman in an ankle bracelet.

Lucy still refers to Grandma Phyllis by her first name and none of the adults correct her.

Is Kyle that tall or is Daniel that short? Bouffant Boy was towering over Omega Sphere Man at the GCAC today.

Audra's right, she does indeed have the benefit of inside, historical knowledge about McCall Unlimited. However, it seems to me she could just as profitably use that info to help Adam versus Nate. Plus, Adam's single and not opposed to office couch sex. 🤠

Summer better hope the mysterious text she received was from her psycho mama and not Chance. And that he's not having her followed.

Tucker. You know Ashley hasn't fallen back in love with you. Be careful, playboy.

Edited May 24, 2023 by Joimiaroxeu

[One Tough Cookie]

51 minutes ago, Joimiaroxeu said:

Summer better hope the mysterious text she received was from her psycho mama and not Chance. And that he's not having her followed.

BINGO!

eta--when Tucker said they didn't announce their engagement at the Gala because they could have been poisoned {or words to that effect} I seriously lol'd so loud I woke up my cat!

Edited May 24, 2023 by One Tough Cookie

[NinjaPenguins]

1 hour ago, Joimiaroxeu said:

Tucker. You know Ashley hasn't fallen back in love with you. Be careful, playboy.

Maybe she hasn’t. But I have.

[Waldo13]

I’m going to say this at the risk of not being  politically correct.  If I remember my world geography, Hai Phong is in Vietnam.  That is where the monkeys with a keyboard decided to have NE build their semi conductor plant. Every thing else is purely fictional on Y&R so why didn’t the monkeys with a keyboard have NE build the semi conductor plant in Wisconsin?  “Build American, buy American” 🇺🇸.  I have nothing against Vietnam. It became a nice place to visit once the bullets, bombs, and the smell of death in the air cleared.  I wouldn’t mind going back today to see it by land after seeing 18 months by air. 

Nikki, what is giving Cruella that glow is the stick up her ass.  That stick is so long you can actually see it dragging behind her as she walks. 

Talking about a stick up their ass, for Ashley it’s a 2x4.  

Then we have Natey Nate Nate. The Home Depot special ordered an entire Pine Tree for Natey Nate Nate could stick up his ass. It was so far up his ass that he could spit pine cones. 

Summer❄️❄️❄️❄️, the police will never find her because she has that perfect disguise. The dark wig and glasses makes her invisible 😜.  Summer❄️❄️❄️❄️ apologize to Kyle but still doesn’t confess to seeing Crispy 2.0 herself.  Summer❄️❄️❄️❄️ blames everyone else but herself just what she was taught to do by her mother.  Summer❄️❄️❄️❄️ think about it, if Saint Crispy 2.0 was so blameless then why wouldn’t she fight to defend herself. Isn’t that one of her claims to fame.  

The more I see Audra the more I see why Noah was interested in her. What I can’t see is why Audra was interested in Noah unless it was his last name.  

All this talk about Natey Nate Nate taking over Banana Breath’s or Nikki’s job is so much to do about nothing. Cruella might not have a problem but Victor sure will. The only reason Locke was allowed to get control, was that Victor thought he was dying and NE got control of Locke’s business.  As for Banana Breath quitting NE, a snowball has a better chance in hell. 

I have a big question. Is the entire Grand Albatross being fumigated?  Doesn’t CW own the Grand Albatross so why would Daniel be living at the GCAC and Lucy be getting her manicure there?  

Ashley calling Jack a sanctimonious self righteous hypocrite 😂. Pot meet kettle 😜.  Ashley besides, Diane is a lot more family than Tucker.  Diane is a blood relative Tucker is not. 

Today we get the recurring under lining theme of people being critical of the hypocrites by being hypocritical themselves. 

[WhitneyWhit]

Poor Daniel. For most parents the most stressful talk is the birds and bees, for Daniel it will be explaining Phyllis. 
 

It cracks my shit up when Victoria and Nikki play businesswomen. It reminds me of my business executive Barbie. 
 

I want Tucker and Ashley to get married and for him to dickmatize her into no prenup and somehow wrangle the Abbot house from them, rename it Tucker Land and throw everyone out. 
 

Camp Wildwind. Josh if you don’t sit your ass down. 

Edited May 24, 2023 by WhitneyWhit

[One Tough Cookie]

16 minutes ago, WhitneyWhit said:

I want Tucker and Ashley to get married and for him to dickmatize her into no prenup and somehow wrangle the Abbot house from them, rename it Tucker Land and throw everyone out. 

That would be genius!  I could just see him  answering the door when Jack comes by and condescendingly offers him a drink with the sly smile he has perfected.

I will be so happy when Megan Markle sticks the shiv into poor dumb Nate--he has visions of being the world's bet executive, and won't see her coming.

 

[Julyolo]

Nikki still was "Nose Up" today  in her no to Nate convo with her daughter, and I was intrigued watching that they seemed to have forgotten to put the "Crepe Erase" on the left side of her face. Either that, or there is a limit as to how much Botox can be injected into someone's face before it's lethal. Hope Sharon Case knows about that. When  Nikki was walking all of Victoria's ex husbands down memory lane for her disaster review, she didn't even mention Billy! That's how important he is in the big scheme of things. I do intermittently like Tucker, but sometimes I get vibes off of him that remind me of how a grown up version of Eddie Haskell from "Leave It To Beaver" might have turned out. I felt it especially today during that riot in the Abbott living room when Diane broke up the argument Jack and Ashley were having. Jack was giving me Ward Cleaver, Diane was projecting June. So Audra and Nate will be replicating the unholy triangle Audra had with Tucker when she was was getting Intel at Chancellor Winters? My, my, my....Audra is certainly a one trick phoney. Perfect for Nate.

 

Edited May 25, 2023 by Julyolo

[One Tough Cookie]

1 hour ago, Julyolo said:

to how much Botox can be injected into someone's face before it's lethal. Hope Sharon Case knows about that

She's beyond saving. Her face looks like it would split open if she pens her mouth too wide.

[Kitty Redstone]

8 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

Oh dear. Have I stepped on it now?

No, no not at all! I'm so glad you came over @peacheslatour! Apparently Diane faked her death for some stupid reason and came back into Jack and Kyle's lives through Jack's granddaughter, who is sweet but so bland that I can't even remember her name.

It took some time but eventually her and Jack got together, which drove Phyllis, Ashley and Nikki into an alliance which blew up in their faces. Phyllis faked her own death, framed Diane for it, and subsequently killed a man that Diane had screwed over during her dead days. It's a very aggravating story.

[MsMalin]

11 hours ago, Julyolo said:

do intermittently like Tucker, but sometimes I get vibes off of him that remind me of how a grown up version of Eddie Haskell from "Leave It To Beaver" might have turned out. I felt it especially today during that riot in the Abbott living room when Diane broke up the argument Jack and Ashley were having. Jack was giving me Ward Cleaver, Diane was projecting June. 

 

Edited 11 hours ago by Julyolo

...and who is The Beaver?

[boes]

19 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

I thought Diane was dead? I thought Nikki and Deacon killed her in the park?

Hi Peacheslatour!!!  So happy to see you back!

Diane would be dead again, too, but Hertz will no longer rent Phyllis a car after the Cricket incident, so she had to try with a combination of velour and overacting.  

[peacheslatour]

26 minutes ago, boes said:

Hi Peacheslatour!!!  So happy to see you back!

Diane would be dead again, too, but Hertz will no longer rent Phyllis a car after the Cricket incident, so she had to try with a combination of velour and overacting.  

Thanks, Boesy I just thought I'd watch Show yesterday. I am lost except that Drinki's hair looked like crap.

Edited May 25, 2023 by peacheslatour

[MollyB]

17 hours ago, Joimiaroxeu said:

Nate is such an egomaniac he has no clue how easily Audra is working him

He's really blinded by his own light-maybe because he believes all the bullsh!t Vic feeds him about how smart he is and what great ideas he has.  I'm not sure what skills transfer over from being chief of surgery but I'm pretty sure Audra has him beat.  Tucker was her mentor, ffs, and she has a lot more time put in corporate gameplaying than Nate ever will.

 

16 hours ago, Waldo13 said:

I have a big question. Is the entire Grand Albatross being fumigated?  

Yeah, how long does it take for one room?  Now we have the 'one room' of the GCAC to contend with.  I've stopped looking for any signs of set decor being changed.  What I'm dying to see is when everybody comes back to their room at the same time.  We'd have Nate and Vic in bed, Sally/Nick/Adam on the couch battling the baby plans, Daniel and his daughter with an awkward moment in the bathroom, Phylth behind the potted palm and Chance crawling around looking for clues.  Then enters Assley and Tucker for a quick non-abbott house romp with Audra right behind them.  Good times.

[One Tough Cookie]

OH. FUCK. NO.

[Rye]

Nine minutes in, Syphyllis has been on screen for 10 seconds and I’m already yelling. You’re staying at… the club? Because you put on a hat and all black?? What about your dumb face? The key’s in Summer’s back pocket?? Throw the whole show away.

Tucker is so well written I don’t think JG is writing for him. I think most of it is ad-libs. Otherwise the other characters would have some humor and self-awareness. Like Tucker’s dialogue and the rest of this dreck can’t be coming from the same person. He broke my heart today when Assly said she was using him. She better not make him skip town. And then pivots immediately into wedding plans, what a 🤬

How many coffees does one need to sell to break even on owning a coffee shop? Sharon only sells coffee to people she knows personally. Is it $1000 a cup? Also all these date nights to empty clubs and bars are so depressing and uncomfortable. Nothing says “exciting night on the town” like doing exactly what you do at home for more money in less comfortable chairs and clothes.

They dead made a kids table. The kids talking about what train wrecks the adults are was hilarious if you ignore the obvious need for therapy.

I just don’t see any chemistry between Sharon and Chance. Put him with somebody else (not Summer, though he does seem to have more chemistry with her than Sharon).

Dude, get Phyllis off my screen I stg. I don’t 👏🏾want 👏🏾 it.

Edited May 25, 2023 by Rye

[pvandal]

Summer: "I didn't know if you were eating out of a dumpster or..."

Phyllis: "Eating out of a dumpster? No silly girl, I only have sex on those."

[MsMalin]

^ yeah, and I thought Chance was searching for Phyllis in the dumpster today.

[boes]

8 minutes ago, MsMalin said:

^ yeah, and I thought Chance was searching for Phyllis in the dumpster today.

https://media.giphy.com/media/MPj7W6FhLILqUY4QjS/giphy.gif

"Yup.  Phyllis was definitely here.  I found her underwear."

Edited May 25, 2023 by boes

[Js Nana]

When Billy explained to Jack that Ashley was afraid that Diane would use her marriage to Jack as a way of wheedling her way into a position of power in Jabot, I remembered back to a scene from an episode from about 5 (?) months ago, when Diane was touching Jack's desk and chair like she was trying them on for size.

[One Tough Cookie]

3 hours ago, MsMalin said:

^ yeah, and I thought Chance was searching for Phyllis in the dumpster today.

If only....I wonder if he had a warrant for the room search?  I know the dumpster was fair game; no warrant needed, but could the paper be excluded b/c it was  found during an illegal warrant {Proud Judge Judy School of Law Graduate}?

I think Ashley is falling for Tucker, as much as she can't admit it to herself.

Oh, Bluetooth:  Those neon choppers and the hideous neon duck lips give you away even a in a dark room.

1 hour ago, Js Nana said:

When Billy explained to Jack that Ashley was afraid that Diane would use her marriage to Jack as a way of wheedling her way into a position of power in Jabot, I remembered back to a scene from an episode from about 5 (?) months ago, when Diane was touching Jack's desk and chair like she was trying them on for size.

I totally remember that; she had a enigmatic smile on her face....

[Desperado]

I’m watching but skipping a lot, like the P. scenes and the awkward new spouse family event.

I was distracted by Summer and Daniel wearing the same exact brown. It doesn’t take much. 😂

Chase wants to buy Sharon FIVE bottles of champagne? That’s my kind of guy! 🥂 But… why?

Another “why” - I hope Tucker being Ashley’s lap dog is a con and he’s planning to take over something, anything, because I cannot buy him being blinded by love by her. 

Edited May 26, 2023 by Desperado

[WhitneyWhit]

I know damn well this show didn’t have Crispy show up at the GCAC looking like she just came from a live production of The Incredibles and calling it a disguise. 
 

I know that the only emotion Sharon is capable of these days is 10 mg of Percocet but did she mean to play that scene as if she was having a sentimental thought of Phyllis? I mean she does remember how and why Summer even exists, right?

Speaking of Summer, were her pants on backwards? 
 

Has LauraLee always delivered her lines with such…breathless flair and I just never noticed? She sounds like she’s fighting for her Iife in nearly every scene. Speak if that scene though, again, the story of Crispy (sadly) being alive did not come from Jack. It came from Daniel. Why do those two never mention that? 

[Waldo13]

Once again I have to ask Summer❄️❄️❄️❄️ how is Crispy 2.0 going to clear herself while she’s hiding?  What information can Crispy 2.0 gather if she is hiding.  Crispy 2.0 has come back to GC in anonymity but she doesn’t even need the wig anymore. All Crispy 2.0 needs is a baseball cap and glasses to render her invisible 😜.  I guess, by being invisible, Crispy 2.0 was able to put the room key in Summer❄️❄️❄️❄️’s back pocket. 

Crispy 2.0 though is not ready to reveal herself as being alive. The longer Diane twists in the wind the better.  I declare 🐂💩 on how much Crispy 2.0 loves her kids. Crispy 2.0 can never get me to believe she loves her kids more than she loves herself.  Crispy 2.0’s love, for her kids  is like Victor’s love for his kids. They are just useful tools to get what they want.  If it comes to a trial, Crispy 2.0 is willing to allow her children to lie to protect her. Crispy 2.0 has already had her children commit a crime. What’s one more. 

Chance hopefully you have found the evidence that Crispy 2.0 is alive but I don’t trust the GCPD forensics lab to identify the fingerprint DNA.  Hey Chance, you rifled through the garage to find the evidence but you didn’t put the garbage back in the dumpster.  I find it quite comical that Chance found the evidence, in a dumpster, that could prove Crispy 2.0 is alive.  A dumpster is were Crispy 2.0 also had sex.

How wise was it that the kids not only to sit at a separate table but to put an extra table between them.  It was quite enlightening for Johnny, Conor, and Lucy to discuss their heritage.  In a way, the are more self aware than the adults. Did I see a chemistry test between Johnny and Lucy?  It looks like Conor is the odd man out 😥. Conor, give it a few weeks to make you and Katie teenagers and you can have a girlfriend also. 

 

Summer❄️❄️❄️❄️ lives in reality 😳, well maybe but that is Summer❄️❄️❄️❄️’s reality and that’s a very lonely place. 

[One Tough Cookie]

5 minutes ago, Desperado said:

Another “why” - I hope Tucker being Ashley’s lap dog is a con and he’s planning to take over something, anything, because I cannot buy him being blinded by love by her

I do, however, buy his attempts at personal rehabilitation and trying to change. It's hard, I know from experience, but it can be done.  I'm rooting for those crazy kids.

I'm anxious to see the size of the rock that winds up on her finger!

[Stpauliegirl]

Looks like Show has given up on the Grand Phoenix set.  Most of its former residents seem to have moved to the GCAC, Mariah and Tessa had dinner and a room there, and people are hanging out at Neil’s jazz lounge. Ok by me as those sets are much nicer than the GP sets.

[MsMalin]

11 minutes ago, Stpauliegirl said:

Looks like Show has given up on the Grand Phoenix set

Funny thing is, I read today they are having a contest and the prize is a tour of the sets. That will be an awfully short tour.

******************

Okay, so if that trash was a couple of weeks old, how did Chance know it was tears and mascara?  More likely p*$$ and $h:!  !!!

*********** 

Finally someone (Connor) said out loud that Sally and Nick were fucked up. Those kids showed more sense in 5 minutes than the adults have all year.

[boes]

I see it was 2 for 1 Reptile night at the Neil Winters Jazz Club and Vomitorium.  So Devon, the moral lighthouse of Genoa City, is planning to use Tucker's wish to develop a closer relationship with him so he can get dirt on his plans?!?  Isn't this very similar to what he accused Tucker of doing with him which he found so morally repugnant?  What a prince of a guy.

Abby practically swallowed her tongue with outrage at Tucker for possibly getting close with her mother and is apoplectic at the idea of Lil' Dom getting to love his grandfather and then leave town.  Put aside the nonsensical idea that anyone is bound to the borders of a town because an absence might upset the baby, but hearing Abby get outraged by Tucker at all is pretty damn rich.  

She seems to forget, or dismiss as unimportant, that she RAN HIM DOWN, full intent to kill, and then let her mother take the blame.  And she's worried that Tucker might be a bad influence?  Look in the mirror, Abby, and look deep.

She and Devon seemed truly made for each other today.

Oh, damn, the Kraken wakes, just as delusional and awful as before she died.  Let's see.....she's mad at Christine for believing she's dead and she's mad at Jack, Michael and Kyle for believing she's alive.  She's now developed super sleuthing powers and can slip key cards in pants pockets, but she still can't learn to not slather on the lip gloss like she's glazing a honey baked ham.  Dummer seems to think the hole she's dug for herself isn't deep enough and goes all in on keeping her mother hidden.  

Ugh.  It was such a pleasure to have Phyllis off screen.  Now my headache is back.

Let's not forget that dinner.  ButtBiscuit was so pissed that Lily didn't seem to miss the wind from his nostrils dancing through her hair, nor did she seem to miss his ponderous attempts at humor.  Chelsea bubbled like a holy water fountain and Daniel sat there seeming to wonder where his life went wrong.  Fun times.  I like Lily but a strong pass on the parmesan crusted halibut.  Cheese and fish, is that a thing?

Last and definitely least, it looks like Rumplestilskin aka Connor has already gotten jealous of Johnnie and Lucy's budding friendship.  Daniel better get ready because it can't be long before the apple of Chelsea's crossed eye locks Lucy in somebody's garage.

But here's hoping it's Nick's.  At least then Christian will have someone to talk to.

Edited May 26, 2023 by boes

[Rye]

I’m hoping Summer is successful in convincing Phyllis not to see Daniel so Summer can be solely on the hook for aiding and abetting. Daniel has no criminal liability at this point; he’s had no contact with Phyllis and as soon as he heard information he reported it to the authorities. Here’s hoping Dummer goes down all by her lonesome.

11 minutes ago, boes said:

She seems to forget, or dismiss as unimportant, that she RAN HIM DOWN, full intent to kill, and then let her mother take the blame.  And she's worried that Tucker might be a bad influence?  Look in the mirror, Abby, and look deep.

I wasn’t watching when this happened, so it’s news to me, but it reminded me of Phylth snotting about Christine not liking her like she didn’t literally try to murder her by running her over with a car.

[Joimiaroxeu]

Interesting how Lily went straight to the GCAC to see Daniel when she got back from NYC. Are they officially together now?

Blah, blah, blah, Summer. Stop trying to deflect blame from your nutbag criminal mommy to your brother.

Wow, the show finally acknowledged that Chance doesn't work for Christine. Their repeated informal meetings to discuss Diane's case have definitely been outside the chain of command.

Lily kept holding her bag close in front of her today like she was trying to hide something. Is CK pregnant?

Steak frites. In a Cuban food-themed restaurant. 🤔

Finally, my wish came true and Lucy and Johnny met! A rich, entitled boy and a down-to-earth upper middle-class girl. It's a match made in soap opera heaven and YA romance novels.

So apparently there's either a garbage collector strike in GC or the NoTell Motel is way behind on their payments to their trash removal service. Eww, Chance, you better burn your clothes after that nasty adventure in dumpster diving.

Poor Connor, lol. Is he still at the "girls have cooties" stage or is he just bothered by Johnny's attention being diverted to Lucy?

Shut up, Billy. If you feel a way seeing Lily happy with Daniel instead of mourning her breakup with you, tough titties.

Wills said it best: "How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child." Devon, if you go looking for trouble with Tucker you're likely to find it. Especially since you're already convinced on Abby's whackadoodle behalf that he's up to no good.

Edited May 26, 2023 by Joimiaroxeu

[lurkerbee]

1 hour ago, Stpauliegirl said:

Looks like Show has given up on the Grand Phoenix set.  Most of its former residents seem to have moved to the GCAC, Mariah and Tessa had dinner and a room there, and people are hanging out at Neil’s jazz lounge. Ok by me as those sets are much nicer than the GP sets.

I'm glad the GCAC is back but am still waiting for everyone who had been living at GP to explain why they moved to the GCAC at the same time. It was like one day they were at the GP and the next, with no explanation at all, they were living at the GCAC. It's like the GP never existed. (And if that's the case, I want both Phyllis and Diane to move there permanently.)

Edited May 26, 2023 by lurkerbee

[Snaporaz]

Maybe I'm giving him too much credit, but I have to believe that JG put in all of those Phyllis<>dumpster references just for us.  If so, I apologize for 5% of the things I've said about you, Josh!

Stupor Girl and The Roast Beast in one room maxed out my asshole tolerance quotient for the week.  Daniel must have been switched at birth.

10 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

Thanks, Boesy I just thought I'd watch Show yesterday. I am lost except that Drinki's hair looked like crap.

Now that you've put your toe in the water, you need to dive back in, @peacheslatour!  You have been missed.  I was just thinking of you recently when the SyFy channel had a Bates Motel marathon on Mother's Day!   

 

[MsMalin]

6 minutes ago, Snaporaz said:

The Roast Beast

Brilliant!

[NinjaPenguins]

Daniel: Remembers what an asshole his sister is.

Lily: Give me some sugar.

Lucy: Heheheh.

@@@@@@@@

Christine: I need MOAR evidence to persecute Diane with!

Chance: Well, you’re up crap creek without a poop knife. The shit is flowing upstream to the Summers sewage containment pen.

Christine: I’m supposed to believe a woman who joyfully pancaked me with a car is out there watching Diane twist in the wind?

Chance: I could also investigate what’s preventing oxygen from reaching your brain.

@@@@@@@

Tucker: Are there any real feelings behind the amazing show we put on at the Abbott Theatre?

Ashley: I have feelings for your penis and its capabilities.

Tucker: Meh.

@@@@@@@@

Sharon: Oh, hey, asshole. How are you? I’ve been thinking about you. Coincidentally I’ve had a pebble in my sandal all day long.

Summer: Oh, you know. One day at a time. My brother’s an uptight twat, my husband is a dildo wig stand and my hair is tragic.

Sharon: Can I get you anything? Directions to the exit?

Summer: Two large coffees and a bag of carbs.

Sharon: You reminded me of Phyllis just then. I think it was the word “bag”. As long as you’re an asshole, it will be like your mom never died.

Summer: Thanks. Checks phone. A message from an unknown caller: CAW CAW THE EAGLE FLIES AT MIDNIGHT. TBD.

@@@@@@@@

Abby: You know how everyone acts like Diane is the devil’s dogwalker?

Devon: I guess?

Abby: i feel like everyone has forgotten that Tucker McCall is Satan’s pool boy, skimming his Olympic sized fire pit and fanning Beelzebub while feeding him Concord grapes in a saucy manner.

Devon: You started on the champagne without me, right?

@@@@@@@

Lily: Sorry you had to see that.

Lucy: I once watched Grandpa Paul soak in butter for two hours in a desperate attempt to slide him out of his tight pants. Nothing fazes me.

Lily: Let me take you guys out to dinner.

Daniel: We have plans. How I wish I was scheduled for a root canal or battery acid colonic instead.

Lucy: Come with us.

Daniel: Trust me. Save yourself. It’s too late for Lucy and me.

Lily: Where are you going? I’d love to tag along.

Daniel: We’re having dinner with Buttbiscuit, Chelz, Connor and Johnny. I’m wondering if I have the courage to slam my dick in a car door to get out of it.

Lily: I live for awkward shit like that. C’mon, Lucy. I’ll explain how Billy Abbott’s transformation into posterior pastry happened on the way over.

@@@@@@@

Tucker: You’re just using me for sex?

Ashley: Is that so wrong?

Tucker: Where do we stand? Fuck buddies? Friends? Lovers? Roomies? 

Ashley: I suppose you deserve to know. I’m hooked on orgasms. And, my god, your coffee…Perverts would pay five figures to watch you manipulate a hazelnut.

Tucker: Great. That and a buck will get me a cup of - never mind.

Ashley: I let you move in. Every day, I trust you a microjot more. Every day, my heart opens one sixty-seventh of an inch to you. Now let us prattle on about our totally fake wedding. I’ll begin with a psychotic glee over sticking it to Jack.

@@@@@@@

Christine: So his Lord of Mightyness at the Abbott manse has convinced you of the rightness of his cause. Well, la dee da.

Chance: Yeah, it’s one strand of long, red hair. But it’s a sign of something. Something dark and oppressive and possibly demonic.

Christine: You don’t directly report to me, so I can’t tell you to step off my airtight masterpiece of a case. But the new chief, who wears pants that are properly tailored, won’t take kindly to you doing smart police work or rectifying injustice. That’s not how we roll in the G.C.

Chance: When I’m off duty, I’ll pursue the truth like Nicholas Newman chasing a bus with a banana in the tailpipe.

@@@@@@@

Sharon: Remember, there are people who love you and care about you. Not me, but somebody, somewhere. Probably.

Summer: If you see my dad, remind him I exist.

Summer turns to leave and is confronted with the sexy face of law enforcement.

Summer: Sorry!

Chance: What’s with all the food? Feeding the pigeons? Or perhaps some other kind of bird?

Summer: Any developments in the case? Not that I’d pass it on to interested parties who were presumed dead.

Chance: The case is closed.

Summer: Yay! Another text from Unknown rolls in. It says ROOM 535. CAW CAW. BRING CARRION. KEY IN BACK POCKET. TOTALLY NOT A CREEPER. Summer conspicuously fondles her own butt and pulls a key card out. Huh. Could have sworn that was a wedgie.

@@@@@@@

Sharon: I feel so bad for her. Really, nature or nurture, she had no other destiny than to become an asshole.

Chance: Clearly. I’ll take all the caffeine you can give me.

Sharon: Speaking of giving, do I have you to thank for an anonymous gift?

Chance: When I give a lady something, they know who it’s from.

@@@@@@@

Daniel: Look who I found! I even told her exactly where I was going and she still came with me.

Lily: I hope it’s okay if I join you because I’m sure as hell not going to miss this.

Chelsea: Do not usurp my position as the center of the universe and all shall be well.

Billy: I, for one, am delighted. By the end of the evening, I’ll have that shit eating grin wiped off Daniel’s face.

Chelsea: Oh dear. I guess I’ll have to bother the waiter for another place setting and we’ll have to rearrange all the furniture in the restaurant to accommodate Lily. But it’s fine. What a lovely surprise.

Johnny: We could just have a kid’s table and a grown up’s table, like at Thanksgiving. You can sit with Chelsea and Lily tonight, Dad.

Connor: Cool.

Lucy: Thank god.

@@@@@@@

Phyllis: The baby bird returns to the nest. Caw caw!

Summer: Caw caw caw! Oh how I missed you. But should you be staying somewhere that a lot of your friends and family frequent?

Phyllis: You didn’t know it was me when I swiped that key card down your asscrack like I was charging new shoes to my Visa.

Summer: You fooled me, which is really really hard to do. That means your disguise is brilliant and you won’t ever get caught.

Phyllis: I called your brother. Haha. I just breathed into the phone and didn’t speak. He knew it was me, right? He could probably feel my maternal love in every breath.

Summer: Yeah, he knew.

Phyllis: I would never abandon my kids. Never abandon them. I’d never let my children think I was dead. What I did wasn’t about my kids, it was about my understandable fixation on Diane. She caused all the pain you and Daniel felt.

Summer: I know. Here are the mealworms and fried unicorn teats you wanted. I hope you haven’t been eating out of dumpsters.

Phyllis: Nah. That’s a very prudish use of a dumpster. I’m really quite financially comfortable thanks to a certain velour benefactor.

Summer: Gosh, maybe he could testify on your behalf if you’re found.

Phyllis: ….

Summer: I gotta tattle on Daniel. You’re going to want to duct tape him to a tree when you find out what a little shit he is.

@@@@@@@@

Lily: I think I’ll order the parmesan encrusted walrus filets.

Daniel: I’m torn between the steak tits and the paella.

Billy: I don’t know what to order. I can smell every ingredient in the kitchen and it all smells so good.

Lily: You’ll just end up ordering your favorite, the seared crab testicles.

Chelsea: Billy’s tastes have evolved. He’s more into sautéed deer taint with candied Funyuns now.

Lily: Well, we can all agree on artichoke dip, right?

Daniel: We can all agree that it sucks.

@@@@@@@@@

Johnny: So we’re decided then. Three burgers, tots, fries and onion rings.

Connor: That dork Billy is probably ordering seafood dick again.

Lucy: Lily kinda filled me on Billy and his fat ass nostrils. She dated him and now he’s with your mom?

Connor: Ugh. And get this. Johnny is my brother.

Johnny: Chelsea is my bio mom but I was raised by another lady and my dad. Chelsea forced herself on my dad. I read it in Grampire’s personal book of the dead.

Lucy: My bio mom raped my dad! She was so totally fucked up but Phyllis busted her out of jail anyway. Heather raised me and we live in Portugal.

Johnny: Grampire paid Chelsea to drug my father. Our grandparents suuuucccckkkk.

Connor: I’m getting a new baby sister. My dad, Adam, is having a baby with his ex-girlfriend, Sally. Sally is dating my Uncle Nick.

Lucy: Your Uncle Nick is so gross. He spent Phyllis’ service digging for gold in the nose mines. He was in up to his hairy knuckles.

Connor: He always rolls them and eats them. I locked my cousin Christian in the garage and the big, dumb baboon still hasn’t let him out.

Johnny: I think Christian might be your brother. I heard Mom discussing it once.

Connor: Why not? Maybe Dom and Harrison are my brothers too.

Lucy: I have two crazy grandmas. They’ve both killed people and tried to kill tons more. I read online they’ve both dumpster dived with Deacon Sharpe, whatever that means.

Johnny: Adults are the worst.

@@@@@@@

Abby: Prepare yourself. I am going to work myself up into a lather over Tucker. The only big announcement I want to hear from my mom and Tucker is that he’s moving to Sumatra to commune with the coffee gods.

Devon: He made me a latte yesterday. I think he is the coffee god.

Abby: How dare he smirk around the family mansion. That’s like a billion times worse than me squatting at the Chancellor estate. He even sleeps in my mom’s bed! I bet his turtlenecks hang right next to her dresses.

Devon: Maybe if your mom trusts him, he’s given her a reason to? She’s pretty sharp.

Abby: Oh I’m getting lathered up now. He can never be trusted. He tried to steal my family’s company! That sniveling little bitch!

Devon: It’s hard to keep track of when you’re all in with the Abbots and when you’re not.

Abby: If he tries to steal Jabot again, I will fuck Tucker up with a boot to the fucking skull. Grrrrrr.

@@@@@@@

Sharon: I got a bottle of champagne delivered with a cryptic note. Detective Kong told me to throw it away, as if I didn’t know.

Chance: Hey, when I finally drag Phyllis out of her non-existent grave, I’ll buy you five bottles of champagne.

Sharon: I’d like that. I’ll need to be blackout drunk to put up with Phyllis.

Chance: It’s kind of creepy, sending champagne to someone anonymously. Want me to look into it?

Sharon: Nah. It’s certainly not some degenerate freak from my past.

@@@@@@@

Ashley: We’ll have the most extravagant wedding possible. It will take place in a castle overlooking the sea. I’ll arrive via horse drawn carriage and will browbeat Jack into giving me away while wearing a suit of armor. Trained swans will act as the flower girl and keeper of the rings. Why are you looking at me like that? 

Tucker: I’m dazzled. And a little frightened.

Ashley: I thought you’d be all hot for an over the top ceremony.

Tucker: When you’re standing next to me at the altar, will you feel anything? Anything at all?

Ashley: If I stick my tongue down your throat, will you stop harshing my mellow?

@@@@@@@

Devon: Tucker’s retired now. And, no offense, but Jabot ain’t all that and a bag of chips.

Abby: What about Dominic? I’m worried he’ll get attached to Tucker and then his grandfather will take the company and run. I want my son to loathe his grandfather because I fill his head with my biased opinions, not because of actual experience.

Devon: I don’t even know how to respond.

Abby: I’ll beat that motherfucker comatose with a hockey stick if he so much as looks at Jabot sideways.

Devon: While your feisty side is exciting, I think you should chill and let me keep an eye on Tucker. If he needs crushing, I’ll do it.

Abby: How?

Devon: Tucker wants a father-son connection, so I’ll give it to him. If he opens up and admits he’s after Jabot, I’ll warn you.

Abby: Good, good. Assume the worst about him and pretend to care in the hopes he’ll admit to skullduggery. Just what history’s greatest monster deserves.

@@@@@@@

Summer: Daniel told everyone you’re alive. That fucking drip. He told Jack and Michael and Diane and Christine and Chance and Lucy. He’s out of control with his morality bullshit!

Phyllis: Chance and Christine, huh? What was their response?

Summer: Chance was all grouchy and Christine doesn’t buy it.

Phyllis: Caw caw! Man, you should have seen that bitch bug and Tightpockets laying there in broken heaps with my tire tracks on their backs all those years ago. I just bet that whore is living the dream thinking I’m dead and buried.

Summer: Well, um, actually she seems to be trying really hard to convict Diane of your murder.

Phyllis: Lying isn’t ladylike, Supergirl.

Summer: Daniel did me one favor, I guess. He told everyone you contacted him and set up a meeting. He kept me out of it. I would have hung him out to dry, personally. He’s so friggin’ weak.

Phyllis: God forbid you protect your own mother instead of Kyle’s! God forbid. Kyle has no right to be angry. No right!

Summer: I know! I’m tired of his “my mom is teh innocent” bullshit. Who cares? I need to make sure you can be as free as Diane.

Phyllis: Bring your brother to me.

Summer: Hell no. Daniel will roll an ankle sprinting out of here to find a cop. He’s way too invested in not allowing people to rot in prison when they’ve done nothing wrong. He can’t be trusted.

Phyllis: I want to hug him.

Summer: No! You were right not to confide in Daniel. How could you let Danny raise him into such a squishy do-gooder dumbass? We’re playing this MY way. I’m a big tough grown up who can easily mastermind a clever scheme to protect you.

Phyllis: No pressure.

@@@@@@@

Chelsea: And so my game will be a beacon of hope, a shining light of optimism to those struggling in the darkness of their own insignificance. Playing it will teach people that if they mess up their own lives, attempt suicide and emotionally burden their children, they too can aspire to transcendence. There can only be one me, of course, but if customers buy my game, they can gain my blessing via pixel.

Lily: Your game is bad and you should feel bad.

Billy: Enough shop talk. Let’s order dessert.

Daniel: Let’s put this evening out of its misery. At least the kids had fun.

Johnny: FLIRT

Lucy: FLIRT

Connor: Knowing look. SULK.

Johnny: Lucy and I will be out front, talking about all the stuff I’ve seen Dad inhale.

Billy: You can’t throw me under the bus. I’ll just snort it.

Chelsea: Connor and I will walk home. Right, buddy?

Connor: Whatever.

Chelsea: Did something happen?

Connor: Let’s just go. Girls are stupid.

Billy, Daniel and Lily linger in the entryway.

Lily: That was… something.

Billy: It was nice seeing you guys. I hope you’re doing well, Daniel. You know, I used to put it on your mom all over the Jabot offices.

Daniel: That’s like bragging that you got to eat fries at McDonald’s. Shit eating grin still intact, bro.

Billy: Yeah, well, I’m glad you have Lily’s friendship. Ya burnt.

@@@@@@@

Chance is outside the no-tell motel where Jeremy Stark took his last breath. He has already searched the room where the murder actually happened, but the plot dictates he find none of the blood particles that must be buried in every crevice and crack. He stares at the trash heap in the alley, puzzling over the teflon coated dumpsters. He wades in, opening his first bag of garbage.

Chance: I guess they pick up the trash here once per month. That is very convenient for storyline purposes. Hmmm. Lots of used condoms. I guess the Genoa City elites don’t fuck here. Ahhh, small animal bones. I’m on the trail now. A program from Phyllis’ service? Jesus in jorts, who designed this crap? Someone who clearly couldn’t spring for Photoshop, the cheap bastards. At least use matte paper!

Chance makes a call, sexily.

Chance: Yeah, can I get a forensics team out to the Booty Call Inn? I’d also like to know if DNA can be extracted from tears. Turns out Crispy might be uncooked after all.

 

[Kitty Redstone]

Absolutely brilliant as always @NinjaPenguins! It's impossible to pick my favorite part, but this:

1 hour ago, NinjaPenguins said:

Abby: i feel like everyone has forgotten that Tucker McCall is Satan’s pool boy, skimming his Olympic sized fire pit and fanning Beelzebub while feeding him Concord grapes in a saucy manner.

 

I can totally picture in my head. If TSJ doesn't dress up as Dionysus for the Y&R Halloween party this year, then there is something wrong with the universe.

Thank you so much for the laughs. I really needed it tonight.

[boes]

NinjaPenguins, this time you had me laughing so hard, one got stuck and we had to call the paramedics to do a laughectomy.  They offered to help me fake my death in a firey crash but I declined.

Then, I read THIS 

Quote

 

Billy: It was nice seeing you guys. I hope you’re doing well, Daniel. You know, I used to put it on your mom all over the Jabot offices.

Daniel: That’s like bragging that you got to eat fries at McDonald’s. Shit eating grin still intact, bro.

 

 

and you done killed ####DEAD#### again.

[Sweetpea4Utoo]

What was the reason for Daniel to break bread with Billy and Chelsea?

[boes]

5 minutes ago, Sweetpea4Utoo said:

What was the reason for Daniel to break bread with Billy and Chelsea?

His life sucks so bad right now he wanted to see if he could make it even worse?

That's all that I can come up with.

[NinjaPenguins]

Chelsea invited him after running into him somewhere, probably so she could blither blather about her dumb gaming concept. Daniel might have accepted thinking the children would act as a buffer or that Buttbiscuit’s twin tunnels of despair would absorb the sounds coming out of Chelsea’s mouth hole. And if dinner with the egos that ate Genoa City wasn’t punishment enough, now Bluetooth McCrispy wants to hug him, and his horrible sibling is treating his misguided attempt to protect her marriage like a federal crime.

[One Tough Cookie]

At last, a story line that doesn't have a corporate line with actors spewing lines about profit margins, budgets, foreign markets, etc.  Refreshing.

I am sincerely hoping MS's hotel room as a a carbon monoxide leak.

@NinjaPenguinsI can't..to much humor to pick one out. Have you sent your resume to the YR office yet?

[Rye]

I’m sorry, Dummer the Pouting Phenom is a CEO?? That’s nearly as ridiculous as Nikki “Tassels” Newman overseeing operations for an international conglomerate. It actually makes me feel a little bad for Nate (and Neil), scheming and grinding for a C-suite position they just literally hand to anybody.

Phyllis is absolutely disgusting, breezily saying she shouldn’t have come back, just to fish for Summer to clamor after her. An open wound of her daughter’s trauma is just an endless source of validation for this c***.

Finally you won…? Cool. Cool. Go directly to jail.

Even Summer started to be shocked and disgusted that Phyllis watched the memorial. Note Phyllis’s initial narcissistic reaction was to shrug and say she needed to know how her kids felt, duh. She only pivoted to (FAKE) remorse when she calculated she was losing Summer’s adulation.

Yes, Cricket, it does sound exactly like Phyllis. Nice of you to join us.

wtf is Sharon wearing.