Carlin and Evan: But Mostly Carlin!

[Salacious Kitty]

They can go sightseeing after the wedding. It's not like they have to get back for work. 🙄

[writerwoman]

It’s gonna be five days of a lot of snacks and FaceTime with errrrrbody and rock paper scissors dynamite 🙄

[Heathen]

1 hour ago, GeeGolly said:

Because she's having an EEG due to passing out, falling and having seizures. I believe after one fall she was diagnosed with a concussion. Hospitals don't like folks passing out and injuring themselves on their watch. I'm assuming she'll be off any medications she is taking now (if she's even taking them), so by hospital standards, I'm guessing she's a fall risk.

I'm pretty sure the doctors have figured out that she's lying about all of the above, and they just ordered the test (IF they did) to shut her up. 

[Salacious Kitty]

2 minutes ago, Heathen said:

I'm pretty sure the doctors have figured out that she's lying about all of the above, and they just ordered the test (IF they did) to shut her up. 

I don't think doctors would order the EEG without evidence of prior events. That would be a huge waste of time and money. 

[GeeGolly]

1 hour ago, Salacious Kitty said:

I don't think doctors would order the EEG without evidence of prior events. That would be a huge waste of time and money. 

EEGs are diagnostic tests. They're looking for evidence of events. Everything up to this point is patient reported.

[clueless101]

21 hours ago, BitterApple said:

I agree about Ma and Pa Stewart. I like my in-laws, I really do. But would I want to be with them 24/7 3-4 days at a time, several times a month? No. I'm sure E&C think it's great, because they don't have to do anything, but it's not normal. Don't they want to spend time as a nuclear family? As a couple? Doesn't Carlin have any mom friends? Doesn't Evan have any buddies to bro around with? They attend a big mega-church, right? It's odd they don't seem to have any relationships, aside from the creepy pastor and his wife, especially given that they're both extreme extroverts. 

 

They have no friends.  Who could put up with these people?  Can they even have adult conversations?  And Evan.  Who wants to deal with that moron?

[cereality]

22 minutes ago, clueless101 said:

They have no friends.  Who could put up with these people?  Can they even have adult conversations?  And Evan.  Who wants to deal with that moron?

Exactly. These are people who will 100% go thru life with just family - i.e. people who HAVE to put up with them [and even then some family who can't deal with them have drifted the hell away] and I guess other people who are paid to put up with you like the pastor and his wife; there's a reason they consider paid service providers like photographers to be "sweet friends."

I don't think they understand the concept of having friends and I do chalk that up to Carlin being raised by grifters G&K and Evan being a sheltered little homeschooled mamas boy. I mean they appear to think friends are only around to DO stuff for THEM. I mean there was that girl Christian who appeared to want to help them out when Carlin's episodes began. It started with staying at the house with Carlin or helping Evan get Carlin home after the episode, even staying over their house one time when things happened at night. And then it quickly escalates to them dumping the kids on her so they can go party party at BSB and having her deep clean their tub upon move in?? Uh hello - this girl obviously noticed that you had no troubles grabbing Sbux every hour, nor any problems heading to a beach vacation that same summer with Z&W, nor heading to Vegas for some clothing buyers event. So really did you NEED that much help? Could you have not spent $200 on a move in cleaning service? We never saw her again.

More recently they invite some friends + Z&W over for dinner. Zach is putting together the griddle which is sitting in boxes when he arrives, and then the friend's husband slaves over the hot griddle making fried rice for all bc the manly man who needed the griddle couldn't be bothered!? Never saw that couple again.

Evan invited some guy friend over from church to "help" put up his Christmas lights - meanwhile friend is doing most of the work, climbing on the roof etc. while Evan films and talks!? How much do we want to bet Evan didn't reciprocate the next day/weekend but going to that guy's house to put up lights. Never saw him again.

The only non family place they go is church and pretty sure their rep has gotten around at church. Hello - friends are not free labor, no matter how much Gil grifted nor how much Evan's mommy and daddy told him that he was the handsomest oldest son ever of course EVERYONE wanted to help him . . . .

[BitterApple]

They asked their friend to clean their tub?! How did I miss this? 

I haven't seen Alyssa's minion (Kelsey? Kinsley?) around for a minute either. Maybe she got a clue when Alyssa and John said they don't make their real friends go on camera. 

 

[RebeccatheWriter]

3 hours ago, BitterApple said:

They asked their friend to clean their tub?! How did I miss this?

 

It was really random. It was this woman who appears next to Carlin throughout the video "CARLIN'S BIG FALL CAUGHT ON SECURITY CAMERA! RESULTS IN CONCUSSION!" I remember her in particular because she has what is called Idiopathic Intracranial Hypertension. I have that too and it sucks. I always thought it was crappy that they played up Carlin's symptoms and incidents when she was sitting there dealing with that. 

[GeeGolly]

Don't forget their pastor's pool. I believe this year Carlin wrote on a reel, first pool day of the season. Not about her own pool. Not about a nearby public pool. Nope, she wrote it about someone else's private pool.

The Stewarts are so caught up in their SM celebrity they think they are all that. Yet, as others have noted, they are down to Z&E and K&T out of a zillion Bates siblings and Evan's family.

They are definitely the king of people others scurry away from after church and hide from when they're seen in Walmart.

But... lest we forget, Evan, such the hotshot, has the "personal" cell phone number of one of Carlin's MDs. (who wants to tell him its likely a work cell?)

 

[writerwoman]

4 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Don't forget their pastor's pool. I believe this year Carlin wrote on a reel, first pool day of the season. Not about her own pool. Not about a nearby public pool. Nope, she wrote it about someone else's private pool.

The Stewarts are so caught up in their SM celebrity they think they are all that. Yet, as others have noted, they are down to Z&E and K&T out of a zillion Bates siblings and Evan's family.

They are definitely the king of people others scurry away from after church and hide from when they're seen in Walmart.

But... lest we forget, Evan, such the hotshot, has the "personal" cell phone number of one of Carlin's MDs. (who wants to tell him its likely a work cell?)

 

Bless his heart. And I mean that in the most southern way possible 🙄

[RebeccatheWriter]

What was very telling to me was how little help they received from her family when they moved. Zach (and the couple of brothers he recruited) did some of the renovations such as the fireplace surround and the kitchen counters/bar. But for moving day it was basically his family packing, lifting, and unpacking. Earlier this year Gil and Kelly had an issue with one of their bathrooms that they needed repaired. Kelton came running. So did Bobby and family. Those middle three boys were there. Evan was no where to be seen though in one video they mentioned hiring an electrician. 

Kelly showed up in a few videos during renovations and moving to sit around with her Sonic cup and hold the grandchildren, but the lack of friends or her family to assist was very clear. I think it boils down to two things.

1. While they aren't evil or horrible people, they are exhausting. I am right on the line between introvert and extrovert. I would need 2-3 days of solitude after dealing with them. I have a feeling this is why we don't see Josie or Michaela visiting. Michaela will pick up the kids on occasion, but I don't think you're going to see Michaela and Brandon popping over for dinner. 

I don't like to speculate on if Carlin is faking or not faking. My friend did notice that she seems to always have her eyes closed fully and her mouth closed during a fainting/seizure episode. Most people in such a situation have a parted mouth and their eyes are semi-closed. She is a paramedic and teaches it in college. I do wonder if her siblings are wary of Carlin or think that she is being dramatic. Again, I'm not trying to speculate. I just know sometimes our critics share genes with us. 

2. With no show in production, there is no need (financially) to keep up the facade of close knit family. For example the last few I Love You Days or holiday celebrations have not included every single family member. Notably Zach and Whitney have been absent and Carlin and Evan have left early.

However, even with no show, we saw Erin and Chad who moved to another state had help from her parents, five of her brothers, a sister-in-law, two sisters, and various people I didn't recognize. Erin can be just as annoying and too much, but she somehow manages to have family who visit her. 

As a final thought, none of the Bates were raised to have friends. They were supposed to be best friends with each other. Even Kelly strives to be besties with her grown daughters around the time they start planning a wedding. I don't know that they understand the mechanics of friendship and that it is give/take not just take. 

[YupItsMe]

“but I don't think you're going to see Michaela and Brandon popping over for dinner”
 

No one is popping over to Carlin’s house for dinner because they don’t seem to do dinner at home.

[cereality]

I think everyone realizes that C&E are of the - give them an inch, they'll take a mile - variety. Her siblings realize this the most and are no where to be found besides Z&W who have to deal with them [and I do wonder if they regret it and wish they had started their own biz without any siblings at all]. I mean they moved smack in the middle of her episodes when it was still potentially scary and still her siblings had clearly decided - it's NBD and/or what have they ever done for us? I mean Trace pitched C&E SUCH a high price to re-do their floors that they had to go with someone else!? Lol. I mean I guess maybe Lydia influenced him due to being Josie's bestie but let's be real he is the headship of his home, it's his own biz which doesn't make a ton of $ - he could have pitched a normal price if he wanted the job and Lydia couldn't have stopped him. I'm guessing he didn't want weeks of Carlin's screeching and Evan second guessing every little thing he did.

10 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

But... lest we forget, Evan, such the hotshot, has the "personal" cell phone number of one of Carlin's MDs. (who wants to tell him its likely a work cell?)

 

HAHAAHAHA. Bless his heart as they say in the south.

Turned off their last YT bc they were so effing RUDE re the medical staff/scheduling. Legit 100% of the ONE YEAR delay is the fault of the schedulers, nurses etc., NOT ONE THING is THEIR FAULT!? Every time they did something or submitted something to get the test scheduled, the schedulers would just magically put them at the back of the line?? Yeah right bro.

My guess is they were told you need to do these 3 tests + submit these 3 paperwork things before we can schedule. They'd do 1, let 3 months pass, do another, call and be like - can we schedule - uh no, we still need the 4 outstanding things. And in their minds that spins to - these effin' medical assistant/schedulers just keep putting us at the back of the line.

I also do wonder if they have really bad insurance or are doing this without insurance prior authorization or had to dr shop or something bc at one point someone called them to ask if they were "all set on payment." Uh how often have you ever been asked that if insured? If your insurance is the type that needs the prior authorization, they get that done. Sometimes these days they can tell you what your out of pocket will be at least ballpark if it's something big. IDK something about that didn't sound right to me.

But look at Evan acting like a big swinging dick now with his whole - I NEED TO TALK TO THE DOCTOR, THIS TEST NEEDS A TREADMILL. Right Evan - very easy to have big dick energy sitting in your own home filming for your leghumpers who'll agree with anything you say. We all remember you when it was time to advocate for Carlin - uh IDK what to ask, I'm going to bring her daddy along . . . . And btw tests are done how they are done for a reason, you can/should certainly ask questions but if you sit there and demand a treadmill [he won't - in front of outsiders with an education, I bet he's a yes sir, no ma'am kind of guy; just easier to talk big on YT] what are they going to do, haul in a treadmill bc Dr. Stewart has decided one is necessary?

[RebeccatheWriter]

1 hour ago, YupItsMe said:

“but I don't think you're going to see Michaela and Brandon popping over for dinner”
 

No one is popping over to Carlin’s house for dinner because they don’t seem to do dinner at home.

If they do, you have to build their flat top for them or order out.

When Zade was born Evan placed a camera high up in the room and filmed all the visitors and medical staff. I thought it was interesting that the siblings came in mostly one at a time and stayed a short time (completely appropriate). I think they are more comfortable in settings they can control. But then I picture Carlin hooked up to an IV chasing them down the hall, screaming "Pay attention to me!" 

On another note, they needed a sign on the door saying you were at risk of being filmed if you entered the room. While it would have been a courtesy, it is also a safety issue. A co-worker of mine had been in an abusive relationship that turned into stalking and threats. One of the students where we worked recorded bits of class and people in the halls, etc. He had a YT and IG channel where he did day in the life stuff. He was a popular guy and had a lot of followers, including her ex who saw where she worked and heard them refer to her by the name she was using (she picked a different family name). 

[JAYJAY1979]

On 9/2/2023 at 9:26 PM, BitterApple said:

I agree about Ma and Pa Stewart. I like my in-laws, I really do. But would I want to be with them 24/7 3-4 days at a time, several times a month? No. I'm sure E&C think it's great, because they don't have to do anything, but it's not normal. Don't they want to spend time as a nuclear family? As a couple? Doesn't Carlin have any mom friends? Doesn't Evan have any buddies to bro around with? They attend a big mega-church, right? It's odd they don't seem to have any relationships, aside from the creepy pastor and his wife, especially given that they're both extreme extroverts. 

 

I'm not sure if E & C did pre-marital counseling or not... and I'm not sure if the advice my dad and step mom were given is something that would be given to a young couple getting ready to be married but....

Years ago when my dad and now step mom were engaged.. they did pre-marital counseling at the Baptist that they would be attending in the south.  One of the things the counseling/minister asked them was if they had kids and what their relationships were with their kids.  My dad and I have a cordial relationship.. but we don't talk nor see each other all the time.. while my step mom has an almost too close a relationship with her three kids (talks everyday on the phone, baby sits the grand kids, goes on trips with the kids and grandkids, etc).

The minister's one piece of advice was that they needed to marry and not have constant contact with their kids/grandkids because they needed that time to grow as a couple without their grown kids around.

I would think maybe E & C would have benefited from a year on their end with a less enmeshed relationship with their families where they would grow together as a couple and have their own family unit.   I guess that isn't the case.

[BitterApple]

With regards to the camera in the hospital room, how does that work with medical staff? I would not appreciate being filmed at my job. Can they tell them to turn the cameras off before they attend to Carlin? 

 

[ozziemom]

I think the combination of Evan and Carlin together must be overwhelming and most of the Bates siblings find it easier to just avoid them. 

I recall C& E had loads of excuses around the scheduling of the EEG, it was always something pretty lame IIRC, typical C&E nonsense. Most of us snarkers felt like they were avoiding the test for reasons known only to them.

[Heathen]

4 hours ago, cereality said:

I also do wonder if they have really bad insurance or are doing this without insurance prior authorization or had to dr shop or something bc at one point someone called them to ask if they were "all set on payment." Uh how often have you ever been asked that if insured? If your insurance is the type that needs the prior authorization, they get that done. Sometimes these days they can tell you what your out of pocket will be at least ballpark if it's something big. IDK something about that didn't sound right to me.

But look at Evan acting like a big swinging dick now with his whole - I NEED TO TALK TO THE DOCTOR, THIS TEST NEEDS A TREADMILL. Right Evan - very easy to have big dick energy sitting in your own home filming for your leghumpers who'll agree with anything you say. We all remember you when it was time to advocate for Carlin - uh IDK what to ask, I'm going to bring her daddy along . . . . And btw tests are done how they are done for a reason, you can/should certainly ask questions but if you sit there and demand a treadmill [he won't - in front of outsiders with an education, I bet he's a yes sir, no ma'am kind of guy; just easier to talk big on YT] what are they going to do, haul in a treadmill bc Dr. Stewart has decided one is necessary?

I would bet money that they've been doctor-shopping. People with factitious disorder are notorious for hopping from one doctor or hospital to another until they get what they want. 

LOL at "big swinging dick" -- Giggle Boy probably does think that he's the big cheese, compared to those losers who get up and go to work every day. 

[RebeccatheWriter]

3 hours ago, JAYJAY1979 said:

I'm not sure if E & C did pre-marital counseling or not... and I'm not sure if the advice my dad and step mom were given is something that would be given to a young couple getting ready to be married but....

Per the show they did because they got a discount on their marriage license. I think that Gil did the counseling, but I'm not 100% sure.

 

2 hours ago, BitterApple said:

With regards to the camera in the hospital room, how does that work with medical staff? I would not appreciate being filmed at my job. Can they tell them to turn the cameras off before they attend to Carlin? 

 

Most places would not allow it. However, the Bates (Gil and Kelly) have negotiated such things for years in terms of the show. So I wonder if there was some sort of agreement in effect. If I have the timeline right, Zade was born not long after the show was canceled. There may have been an agreement already in effect with that and Carlin/Evan just did what they wanted.

I don't know that they told people though. He had to climb on something to put a camera up there. So they could have "forgotten." 

The USSC rulings on this sort of thing say that you should not be photographed or videoed without permission in any location where you have an expectation of privacy. I would argue that a hospital room is such a place.

I would say at the very least there should have been a sign on the door so that someone not wanting to be recorded would know to steer clear. I don't think they did it because Tori visited and she was visibly pregnant. She refuses to be on camera these days and probably would have told them no. That was how pregnancy 3 or 4 was revealed. 

Evan could have jumped up and turned it off when nobody was there. However, that seems like a bit much for him. There was tons of footage from the mounted camera, including Carlin sleeping and them eating, etc. When they went to leave and go home, she was wheeled out and he ran back in to get the camera. 

Edited September 5, 2023 by RebeccatheWriter

[JAYJAY1979]

14 minutes ago, RebeccatheWriter said:

Per the show they did because they got a discount on their marriage license. I think that Gil did the counseling, but I'm not 100% sure.

 

Most places would not allow it. However, the Bates (Gil and Kelly) have negotiated such things for years in terms of the show. So I wonder if there was some sort of agreement in effect. If I have the timeline right, Zade was born not long after the show was canceled. There may have been an agreement already in effect with that and Carlin/Evan just did what they wanted.

I don't know that they told people though. He had to climb on something to put a camera up there. So they could have "forgotten." 

The USSC rulings on this sort of thing say that you should not be photographed or videoed without permission in any location where you have an expectation of privacy. I would argue that a hospital room is such a place.

I would say at the very least there should have been a sign on the door so that someone not wanting to be recorded would know to steer clear. I don't think they did it because Tori visited and she was visibly pregnant. She refuses to be on camera these days and probably would have told them no. That was how pregnancy 3 or 4 was revealed. 

Evan could have jumped up and turned it off when nobody was there. However, that seems like a bit much for him. There was tons of footage from the mounted camera, including Carlin sleeping and them eating, etc. When they went to leave and go home, she was wheeled out and he ran back in to get the camera. 

So if Gil did the counseling.. then they didn't get actual good pre marital counseling.  I would think it would be a conflict of interest to have the brides father handling the pre marital counseling because those sessions are supposed to actually help couples before they get married.. and having her father be there would make the couple less apt to be honest.

[Salacious Kitty]

2 minutes ago, JAYJAY1979 said:

So if Gil did the counseling.. then they didn't get actual good pre marital counseling.  I would think it would be a conflict of interest to have the brides father handling the pre marital counseling because those sessions are supposed to actually help couples before they get married.. and having her father be there would make the couple less apt to be honest.

I don't think fundies are looking for honesty in pre marital counseling. The counselor, be it Gil or some outside entity, tells them their roles (as if they haven't been drilled into the couple from birth), and the couple politely nods. I doubt they do much talking.

[RebeccatheWriter]

1 hour ago, Salacious Kitty said:

I don't think fundies are looking for honesty in pre marital counseling. The counselor, be it Gil or some outside entity, tells them their roles (as if they haven't been drilled into the couple from birth), and the couple politely nods. I doubt they do much talking.

It's a workbook from IBLP that he uses. They showed it briefly with Michael and Brandon. 

[Salacious Kitty]

4 minutes ago, RebeccatheWriter said:

It's a workbook from IBLP that he uses. They showed it briefly with Michael and Brandon. 

Not surprised. 

[GeeGolly]

I'm fairly certain Tori announced her last two pregnancies with photo shoots. I remember because she managed to have her last 3 kids in the first 2 years of the pandemic. Pregnancies and deliveries were big deals then with the ever changing rules regarding covid safety protocols. Kolter was born within days of the lockdown and the girls were born in the summers of 2021 and 2022.

Plus it seemed every Bates sister had covid during their pregnancies, although we usually found that out after the fact.

I'm going to guess every labor and delivery nurse have become adept at avoiding getting caught in photos or reels since everyone walks around with a camera in their pockets.

At least Tori's kids don't have influencers for parents. I can't imagine being C&E's kids. Or even Josie's kids.

Carlin and Evan. ⬇️

Edited September 5, 2023 by GeeGolly

[writerwoman]

Granted, I have never been married so I’m halfway asking this as a serious question, but where do you get a “discount marriage license” that’s not Vegas??

[clueless101]

10 minutes ago, writerwoman said:

Granted, I have never been married so I’m halfway asking this as a serious question, but where do you get a “discount marriage license” that’s not Vegas??

Back when I got married, it was like $25.  

 

[3 is enough]

I don’t think there is such a thing as a discount marriage certificate. It’s a county issued document and the same price for everyone.  Maybe they meant they got a discount on the counseling?

[ozziemom]

C&E are so clueless Gil probably told them there was a discount and since he’s the king of grifting, they believed him.

[RebeccatheWriter]

On the show, the clerk processing the license asks them if they have done the premarital counseling because it was like $30 cheaper if they did. Gil comments that it is worth it just for that discount.

Yes, this is a thing. The kicker is that nobody actually checks. If you answer yes, they give you the discount. It is pretty common in most Tennessee counties and in Georgia. I can't speak to anywhere else.

 

ETA: I just watched that part again. The woman behind the counter, who I recognize because I had to get a copy of my parents' license, asks them if they did premarital counseling. They say yes (this is after Carlin doesn't remember if she was born in TN, doesn't know her parents' real names or where they were born, and doesn't know her social). Kelsey (the clerk) says it will be $40. Gil asks her how much it saved them to do the counseling. She says it saved them $60. 

Note: Carlin tries to get Gil to pay for it but he refuses and tells them they have to put some effort into getting married.

Edited September 5, 2023 by RebeccatheWriter
Clarify what was on the show.

[AstridM]

11 minutes ago, RebeccatheWriter said:

this is after Carlin doesn't remember if she was born in TN, doesn't know her parents' real names or where they were born, and doesn't know her social)

Unbelievable 🤦‍♀️.

[Salacious Kitty]

48 minutes ago, AstridM said:

Unbelievable 🤦‍♀️.

Totally believe. Carlin is that stupid.

[Notabug]

4 minutes ago, Salacious Kitty said:

Totally believe. Carlin is that stupid.

It's not just that she is dumb, but she is willfully ignorant.  Carlin not only doesn't know basic details that most of us have known since childhood, she doesn't care and will make no effort to learn.

[RebeccatheWriter]

9 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

I'm fairly certain Tori announced her last two pregnancies with photo shoots. I remember because she managed to have her last 3 kids in the first 2 years of the pandemic. Pregnancies and deliveries were big deals then with the ever changing rules regarding covid safety protocols. Kolter was born within days of the lockdown and the girls were born in the summers of 2021 and 2022.

Plus it seemed every Bates sister had covid during their pregnancies, although we usually found that out after the fact.

I'm going to guess every labor and delivery nurse have become adept at avoiding getting caught in photos or reels since everyone walks around with a camera in their pockets.

At least Tori's kids don't have influencers for parents. I can't imagine being C&E's kids. Or even Josie's kids.

Carlin and Evan. ⬇️

The issue with what they did was it recorded the whole room and was not obvious like a phone or regular DSLR would be where someone holds it.  

In terms of Tori, yes she announces close to delivery time. I used her as an example of someone who wouldn't be cool with appearing on camera. 

[Natalie68]

On 9/4/2023 at 8:13 PM, Salacious Kitty said:

I don't think fundies are looking for honesty in pre marital counseling. The counselor, be it Gil or some outside entity, tells them their roles (as if they haven't been drilled into the couple from birth), and the couple politely nods. I doubt they do much talking.

If I learned nothing else about fundies, it is that they are NOT honest people.  And all the ones we seem to know about seem like assholes.  Ok, I know, giant swath of judgment bandied about, but its what I see a lot.

On 9/5/2023 at 9:20 AM, AstridM said:

Unbelievable 🤦‍♀️.

Major dumbfuckery

[cereality]

May just be me but whatever Bobby did/didn’t do is making me view C&E (and Z&W and K&T’s) marriages in a new light.

I mean the Bates have been getting married since 2013, and there was never a Jill Duggar type of situation – where Jill used to show up at Walmart HQ to have lunch with HER man daily at the cafeteria and then often even sat outside in the parking lot after lunch until 5 pm. I mean clearly Jill needed everyone to know at all times that there was a wife and she was close at hand.

Then Bobby has an emotional affair or is talking to other women or whatever while Tori is 6 mos pregnant, they run out of Nashville in March 2019, and suddenly Whit has her man staying home a year later and Carlin has her man staying home 3 yrs later – though Evan has let on that Carlin used to cry daily begging him not to go to work for a long time prior.  So I’m thinking Whit and Carlin both started the project of convincing their men that they needed to be home, not out all day with god knows who. I mean funny that before 2019, Whit had no issues with Z working in a city office, going away to a police academy, and being a cop.

Not suggesting that Tori sat down and told her sisters what happened bc I imagine it was too humiliating, but let’s be real G&K knew and Kelly has a big big mouth. I can’t imagine that in the lead up to Carlin’s wedding which was only 2 mos after Bobby/Tori moved back, Kelly wasn’t giving motherly advice in god speak regarding – keep your man close, men are tempted by the devil, often the devil takes the form of hussies who’ll tempt YOUR man, it’s YOUR job to keep tabs on your man 24-7. At the wedding, Gil’s charge pretty much told Carlin to suck her man’s dick 24-7. Gil went on and on and on about – PRAISE him, praise him all the time, praise him for every little thing, that’ll build him up, he’ll be able to fly blah blah. But that was clearly Gil speak for – if he does anything it’s bc YOU didn’t suck hard enough.

Kind of explains Carlin’s years of daily crying of – don’t go to school, don’t go to apprenticeship. Evan held her off for a few years, I imagine by convincing her that all he does is sit in a classroom and his class was 100% guys. But Evan has said before that her anxiety got worse in 2021 – i.e. pregnancy #2. Bobby cheated on her sister while she was pregnant too. And now here was Evan not just in class but at an apprenticeship, and his assignments were all at a hospital.

Gasp a hospital – you know a place where he’d likely enter the hospital Sbux or cafeteria. OMG what if one of the many nurses or med techs or HR women at the hospital dared speak to MY MAN?? I kind of wonder if that’s why he was the weirdo who’d spend his dinner breaks on the phone with Carlin sitting in his car!? Like to show her – I’m not talking to anyone besides you, I’m not even sitting with the other guys anywhere on a hospital campus where a nurse can dare smile at me . . . .

Katie got married well after all this and apparently she’s been the jealous type since day 1 – checking Trav’s phone, getting pissed off if the drive thru woman at Sbux dares to say hi or smile at him etc. Makes you wonder . . . .

[RebeccatheWriter]

So after us questioning where are Carlin and Evan's friends, the church friend showed back up in Carlin's Instagram today. 

Looks like they are at a car show in the parking lot of the church. She and Carlin were trying to identify a car. Carlin says it is a Ford Rider. 

[BitterApple]

Layla is enrolled in dance!!!

Wow, they actually followed through. Even if E&C are just taking her for content purposes, it's still a win. Layla seemed genuinely thrilled with her first class. 

Meanwhile, Alyssa's latest clickbait video was a "week full of sports," which consisted of her daughters sitting on the sidelines watching other kids have fun. 🙄

Edited September 9, 2023 by BitterApple

[SMama]

On 9/4/2023 at 3:54 PM, JAYJAY1979 said:

I'm not sure if E & C did pre-marital counseling or not... and I'm not sure if the advice my dad and step mom were given is something that would be given to a young couple getting ready to be married but....

Years ago when my dad and now step mom were engaged.. they did pre-marital counseling at the Baptist that they would be attending in the south.  One of the things the counseling/minister asked them was if they had kids and what their relationships were with their kids.  My dad and I have a cordial relationship.. but we don't talk nor see each other all the time.. while my step mom has an almost too close a relationship with her three kids (talks everyday on the phone, baby sits the grand kids, goes on trips with the kids and grandkids, etc).

The minister's one piece of advice was that they needed to marry and not have constant contact with their kids/grandkids because they needed that time to grow as a couple without their grown kids around.

I would think maybe E & C would have benefited from a year on their end with a less enmeshed relationship with their families where they would grow together as a couple and have their own family unit.   I guess that isn't the case.

And as much as I dislike Reverend Rad Homie, I give him credit for saying no visitors the first six months (I think?) of their marriage. And I got a great laugh when  Dumb Ass Ben said it didn’t apply to him and family, only to be proved wrong. 

[65mickey]

Sounds to me like Jeremy needed 6 months to get complete mind control over Jinger. I have never heard of a husband issuing this type of command to his wife. And I have never known of a woman who would put up with something like this. Jinger went from one dominating man to another. 

[JAYJAY1979]

16 hours ago, cereality said:

May just be me but whatever Bobby did/didn’t do is making me view C&E (and Z&W and K&T’s) marriages in a new light.

I mean the Bates have been getting married since 2013, and there was never a Jill Duggar type of situation – where Jill used to show up at Walmart HQ to have lunch with HER man daily at the cafeteria and then often even sat outside in the parking lot after lunch until 5 pm. I mean clearly Jill needed everyone to know at all times that there was a wife and she was close at hand.

Then Bobby has an emotional affair or is talking to other women or whatever while Tori is 6 mos pregnant, they run out of Nashville in March 2019, and suddenly Whit has her man staying home a year later and Carlin has her man staying home 3 yrs later – though Evan has let on that Carlin used to cry daily begging him not to go to work for a long time prior.  So I’m thinking Whit and Carlin both started the project of convincing their men that they needed to be home, not out all day with god knows who. I mean funny that before 2019, Whit had no issues with Z working in a city office, going away to a police academy, and being a cop.

Not suggesting that Tori sat down and told her sisters what happened bc I imagine it was too humiliating, but let’s be real G&K knew and Kelly has a big big mouth. I can’t imagine that in the lead up to Carlin’s wedding which was only 2 mos after Bobby/Tori moved back, Kelly wasn’t giving motherly advice in god speak regarding – keep your man close, men are tempted by the devil, often the devil takes the form of hussies who’ll tempt YOUR man, it’s YOUR job to keep tabs on your man 24-7. At the wedding, Gil’s charge pretty much told Carlin to suck her man’s dick 24-7. Gil went on and on and on about – PRAISE him, praise him all the time, praise him for every little thing, that’ll build him up, he’ll be able to fly blah blah. But that was clearly Gil speak for – if he does anything it’s bc YOU didn’t suck hard enough.

Kind of explains Carlin’s years of daily crying of – don’t go to school, don’t go to apprenticeship. Evan held her off for a few years, I imagine by convincing her that all he does is sit in a classroom and his class was 100% guys. But Evan has said before that her anxiety got worse in 2021 – i.e. pregnancy #2. Bobby cheated on her sister while she was pregnant too. And now here was Evan not just in class but at an apprenticeship, and his assignments were all at a hospital.

Gasp a hospital – you know a place where he’d likely enter the hospital Sbux or cafeteria. OMG what if one of the many nurses or med techs or HR women at the hospital dared speak to MY MAN?? I kind of wonder if that’s why he was the weirdo who’d spend his dinner breaks on the phone with Carlin sitting in his car!? Like to show her – I’m not talking to anyone besides you, I’m not even sitting with the other guys anywhere on a hospital campus where a nurse can dare smile at me . . . .

Katie got married well after all this and apparently she’s been the jealous type since day 1 – checking Trav’s phone, getting pissed off if the drive thru woman at Sbux dares to say hi or smile at him etc. Makes you wonder . . . .

I think the Bobby thing may have enhanced/worsened the insecurity most of these Bates daughters have.

You raise these kids to be one another's best friend, live together in a huge boarding school set up, and then as they hit adult-hood.. they entered into marriage with little to no preparation for what marriage truly is.  Sure the daughters all knew how to do food prep, cleaning, etc.. but marriage is a lot more then just domestic duties.

When Tori was engaged, both Erin and Alyssa both hinted that it was lonely when they first got married because they went from being with a bunch of siblings/people to just them and their husband.  I wonder if both Erin/Alyssa also had the crying and anxiety episodes when their husbands went to work/school like Carlin/Katie both did?  All either of them would say was that it was quiet, kind of boring, and it was an adjustment cooking for two people vs 20+ people.

And I wonder if Gil really quit his office job at Nabisco because Kelly also became fearful/paranoid over him potentially talking to another woman at his job?  This could possibly be generational trauma that has passed down from Gil/Kelly to their kids.

[BetyBee]

I would not be surprised to learn that Gil was also a cheater. I do know that he would justify it and make it Kelly's fault. It's never the fault of the man. 

[Absolom]

2 hours ago, 65mickey said:

Sounds to me like Jeremy needed 6 months to get complete mind control over Jinger. I have never heard of a husband issuing this type of command to his wife. And I have never known of a woman who would put up with something like this. Jinger went from one dominating man to another. 

I think Jeremy realized Jinger needed to detox from her family and needed cord cutting time.

Given how JB interfered with Jill and Derick it was probably a good idea.

The Bateses have prepared none of their children for life in the real world.  Even Zach was upset when he went to training and was calling Whitney crying.  It would not surprise me to find that Bobby was looking for attention whether he physically cheated or not, but it would certainly reinforce the insecurity of Tori's sisters if he was let go due any form of improper relationship.  Carlin was at the point of that making an impact on how she dealt with her own marriage and now we have the two immature clowns going.  I'm still thrilled Layla gets to dance and be even the tiniest bit normal.

Edited September 10, 2023 by Absolom

[Meow Mix]

After reading all of this, it makes me think cheating must be rampant in these communities.  In all my years in church, I never remember cheating being discussed like this.  And while some couples I knew went through a honeymoon phase where they were joined at the hip for a short while, no one was this insecure.  I can't imaging being with someone always afraid that if someone in the drive through smiles at them that they will fall into bed with them.  This is just such an unhealthy way to go through life.  

[Heathen]

7 minutes ago, Meow Mix said:

After reading all of this, it makes me think cheating must be rampant in these communities.  In all my years in church, I never remember cheating being discussed like this.  And while some couples I knew went through a honeymoon phase where they were joined at the hip for a short while, no one was this insecure.  I can't imaging being with someone always afraid that if someone in the drive through smiles at them that they will fall into bed with them.  This is just such an unhealthy way to go through life.  

The difference is that for these bible beaters, cheating means anything from talking to someone alone after church with their spouses five feet away, to a torrid years-long love affair. I would bet money that any cheating in Fundie World is more like the former than the latter. 

I do know a few non-fundie women who are that insecure. My bitch of a sister-in-law is one. I think it's rooted in women thinking they are nothing without a man, any man. And it's usually the women who get married young -- the aforementioned bitch was 21 -- who are that shallow. 

[RebeccatheWriter]

8 hours ago, JAYJAY1979 said:

And I wonder if Gil really quit his office job at Nabisco because Kelly also became fearful/paranoid over him potentially talking to another woman at his job?  This could possibly be generational trauma that has passed down from Gil/Kelly to their kids.

She may have complained about needing help with the kids, but I think it was more of an IBLP thing. They were really harping on not working for non-believers around that time.

[GeeGolly]

Carlin, her siblings, the Duggar kids and their ilk were all raised ass backwards. They were prematurely given adult responsibilities and then when they inched closer to adulthood they were treated like toddlers who were incapable of making reasonable decisions.  They were explicitly taught not to trust anyone, including themselves. They were taught what they wore, what they read, what they looked at, how they moved their bodies and what they touched could make them and others lose control.

So they go from a gaggle of siblings, accountability partners, to being home alone and releasing their spouses into the wild. Its a wonder they stay sane.

[clueless101]

What will the duo do to get attention today since Trace and Lydia are having the baby.  Evan can’t handle not being the center of attention 

 

[Heathen]

40 minutes ago, clueless101 said:

What will the duo do to get attention today since Trace and Lydia are having the baby.  Evan can’t handle not being the center of attention 

 

Neither can Carlin. Cue "seizure." 

[Tdoc72]

4 hours ago, clueless101 said:

What will the duo do to get attention today since Trace and Lydia are having the baby.  Evan can’t handle not being the center of attention 

 

I would say camped out in the waiting room w/a bag of snacks since he loves that. But I don’t think E&C are that close to L&T.