S01.E19: The High Road

[druzy]

Ashley invites Bar’s mom over to make peace. Kyler gives Lexi an ultimatum. Kayla faces a choice that could affect her and Izaiah’s lives for years. Jade turns to Sean when Kloie gets sick. Brianna clashes with her mom.

Airs: November 5, 2018

[Mr. Miner]

If brain dead Kayla does not extend the protection order. I would give her two weeks to get her ungrateful ass out of my house.

[Soobs]

Call  me old fashioned but one way to show respect and make peace with someone is to actually get off the couch and greet them at the door. Ashley leaned over and kind of swatted the door open like you would for a pet. The tearful hug between Bar's mom and Ashley with Bar's mom whispering something about loyalty was Godfather level creepy.

Kyler's disrespect of Lexi is reaching emotional abuse levels of toxic. Not something to model in front of a kid.

Did Brianna's mom spend all her Mtv money? I had to laugh when she asked her boyfriend his opinion and then got pissed at his answer. He's allowed to have his opinion, jeez!

[Pepper Mostly]

Kayla is a complete, unmitigated idiot. "it'll just make things worse". Gah. Girl, the guy dragged you out of a car and beat you! He is not going to change! How that dumbshit manages to get her own teeth brushed boggles my mind.

Every week I express amazement that Lexi sees anything attractive in Kyler. Still amazed. And that scene where he gave her the replacement promise ring was utterly cringeworthy. They might have been two strangers on the subway. You know when you drop something and someone hands it to you because it fell close to their foot? Like that. Not a sign of affection or happiness from either of them. Just wordlessly sitting there, staring at their feet. Love's young dream, right there.

Ashley and Bar, I'm pulling for them. I think Ashley showed some growth here. And I like Bar. He seems sweet and thoughtful. He's got a trashy family and he loves them. But he doesn't want to be them.

Brianna and her moronic family baffle me. How long have they been in Oregon? Why are they sitting around complaining instead of, you know, looking for jobs?

[Dance4Life]

Kayla won’t extend the protective order.  I bet all my Skittles that the Court won’t proceed in the assault case because Kayla won’t cooperate. 

 

Did Kayla neglect her son?  His hair in the front is as long as a toddler’s but the back is bald.  Now he needs to wear a helmet.  

[Pepper Mostly]

34 minutes ago, Dance4Life said:

Kayla won’t extend the protective order.  I bet all my Skittles that the Court won’t proceed in the assault case because Kayla won’t cooperate.

I think you have hit the nail right on the head. I wondered why she kept saying it was "he said she said", or that there wasn't enough evidence to charge Stephan. There was a witness right there! Her friend called the cops while Stephan was beating her!

Izaiah wears a helmet to correct the shape of his head. I don't think that's due to neglect.

[eskimo]

35 minutes ago, Dance4Life said:

Did Kayla neglect her son?  His hair in the front is as long as a toddler’s but the back is bald.  Now he needs to wear a helmet.  

I think the hair loss is from the helmet.  He's been wearing it long enough that he's been fitted for his second one.  Something about if the shape of his skull, and if it were to continue to grow without intervention eventually his eyes would be misaligned.  It was a little strange to see the difference between the back and the front, but in this case I don't think it's neglect at all. 

I agree 100% about her not wanting to cooperate.  He's got some kind of hold on her.  She's weak when it comes to him.

[Dance4Life]

7 minutes ago, Pepper Mostly said:

I think you have hit the nail right on the head. I wondered why she kept saying it was "he said she said", or that there wasn't enough evidence to charge Stephan. There was a witness right there! Her friend called the cops while Stephan was beating her!

Izaiah wears a helmet to correct the shape of his head. I don't think that's due to neglect.

 

4 minutes ago, eskimo said:

I think the hair loss is from the helmet.  He's been wearing it long enough that he's been fitted for his second one.  Something about if the shape of his skull, and if it were to continue to grow without intervention eventually his eyes would be misaligned.  It was a little strange to see the difference between the back and the front, but in this case I don't think it's neglect at all. 

I agree 100% about her not wanting to cooperate.  He's got some kind of hold on her.  She's weak when it comes to him.

Yea, because if that was the case (Court not wanting to proceed) she wasn’t even mad or concerned. She could have gotten her justice by extending the protective to 2 years.  But, I don’t believe she will.

 

Even if she goes to court for the 2 year order this can help Stephan get back on track.  She could tell him.  You act right and pay child support for the next 6 months and I can talk with the courts.  

 

Anyone got the chills when the mother told her that he might kill them in a baby voice?

 

Happy to hear that the hair loss is from the helmet and not neglect.  Kayla probably styles it in a Trump comb-over and why she keeps it so long in the front.  ? 

 

Maybe it is just me but I don’t think that kid is his.  Looks nothing like the parents. 

[Pepper Mostly]

16 minutes ago, eskimo said:

I agree 100% about her not wanting to cooperate.  He's got some kind of hold on her.  She's weak when it comes to him.

I don't get it at all. He brings nothing to the table. He's not handsome, or charming, or intelligent, or witty, or kind, or charismatic. He's mean, stupid, ugly, and full of rage. I'd be embarrassed to be seen with such a loser. You know, you sometimes might say about a friend "I don't know why she stays with him. But when he turns on the charm...." This asshole wouldn't know charm if it bit him.

[Icanteven]

I cannot stand Kyler... what the hell is up with him and his ultimatums?! You don’t contact me for a whole day and I’ll get you another promise ring. Um, no, chubby face. And don’t even get me started on his hair and hat ?

And, I agree, Kayla is not going to extend the protection order and probably isn’t working with the cops to get the domestic violence charge filed. Same things going to keep happening to her.

Edited November 6, 2018 by Icanteven

[configdotsys]

Oy vey!

I FF past Ashley’s segments because there’s nothing remotely interesting there.

Lexi is a puppy dog. What she sees in that doughy, unattractive, unwashed-looking dude is beyond my comprehension. She lost the ring and had no remorse? If I lost a ring that my husband gave me, I would be in tears and ripping the place to pieces re-enacting everything I did and praying that I would find it. A replacement just would not be the same, let alone a replacement that comes with the “If you don’t bother me all day and night Friday, I’ll get you another one.” Then she gets the cold, impersonal, “Here, since you held up your part of the bargain,” and hands her the box. How romantic.

Brianna just opened up a world of surprise for her baby’s daddy who will now be responsible for repaying any assistance she gets and will likely get attached for child support. Good. I get that Brianna hates the guy and wants nothing to do with him but using the Judge Judy logic: the support is for Braeson. He deserves to be supported by both parents. If you want to be all tough and strong and “I don’t need his money,” then fine, don’t use his money, put it all in account for Braeson’s future. I felt bad for Robert as he was put in one of those “If I don’t completely agree with her, I’m dead,” but wasn’t smart enough to realize that. I have some advice for you Brianna: If you don’t want to hear the answer, then don’t ask the question.

Saved Kayla for last. I HATE her. Bitch. Her mother needs to grow a pair and tell her if she is going to let the order expire, then she needs to go make a life for herself out of the house or mom needs to try to get guardianship of Izaiah becuase obviously Kayla is dumb as fuck and will allow an abusive jerk around again in no time. Give me a fucking break with Stephan’s “Yes, ma’am” shit on the phone with his mother. He’s an asshole. Always was and it was only a matter of time before he became physically abusive. It’s hard for me to believe that this never happened before in some form. She is doing a disservice to Iziah AND Stephan by not following through. Following through will put Stephan on notice that he HAS to get this addressed and get help or whatever. As her mother said, it also puts it down in writing as a record. Dropping it will be useless. It'll disappear. He’ll be contrite and back around in no time until the next blow up. She’s a moron.

[Quilty]

Kyler is so gross. In every way.

[eskimo]

Lexi and Kyler have less chemistry than most people do with the checker at their local grocery store. 

[suzeecat]

Drinking game every time Brianna says "It's not my job".  Never mind, there's enough brain damage in this world!

[MaggieG]

21 hours ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Kayla is a complete, unmitigated idiot. "it'll just make things worse". Gah. Girl, the guy dragged you out of a car and beat you! He is not going to change! How that dumbshit manages to get her own teeth brushed boggles my mind.

Every week I express amazement that Lexi sees anything attractive in Kyler. Still amazed. And that scene where he gave her the replacement promise ring was utterly cringeworthy. They might have been two strangers on the subway. You know when you drop something and someone hands it to you because it fell close to their foot? Like that. Not a sign of affection or happiness from either of them. Just wordlessly sitting there, staring at their feet. Love's young dream, right there.

Ashley and Bar, I'm pulling for them. I think Ashley showed some growth here. And I like Bar. He seems sweet and thoughtful. He's got a trashy family and he loves them. But he doesn't want to be them.

Brianna and her moronic family baffle me. How long have they been in Oregon? Why are they sitting around complaining instead of, you know, looking for jobs?

Completely agree with everything. I also continue to be amazed at what Lexi sees in Kyler. I just don't get it. I do continue to root for Lexi to come to her senses and dump him and continue on her funeral director path. 

I have no hope for Kayla. She's an idiot and this cycle with Stephan is going to keep happening.

Bar's reaction to when his mom and Ashley were hugging was kinda cute.

This is a nitpick but I wish Brianna would wear actual shoes and not socks with those slip-on flip flops. I feel like she has those on her feet in every one of her scenes

[gunderda]

22 hours ago, eskimo said:

I agree 100% about her not wanting to cooperate.  He's got some kind of hold on her.  She's weak when it comes to him.

It's called living in a fairytale and doesn't end until being a full grown adult - or until someone else comes along to take his place. Although it happens to adults too!

i have to kind of side with Kyler a bit.. even though I think he's the worst.  He CAN put an ultimatum on the ring if she freaking lost the first one without a care in the world. I was totally on his side when she was all "you shouldn't give me ultimatums" and he kept says "BUT YOU LOST THE RING"  fucking idiots...

[Rembeeazy]

Kayla is as dumb as they come. He abused you. If his actions cause him to not be able to see his son then it will be a lesson learned.

Also, I'm not understanding how Izaiah's bald spot could/would be a sign of neglect. My son is 3 and the hair in the back of his head still doesn't grow evenly with the front. Plus he was likely wearing the helmet most of the day in the beginning, which would contribute to it as well. 

[Pepper Mostly]

Stephan hisses "you'd call the police on the father of your son?" but Kayla is too dumb to clap back "you'd beat the shit out of your son's mother?". Dumb as a plank.

[teapot]

Brianna (Breanna?) is a nasty little thing, isn't she?  the way that she snapped at the baby in the last ep when he was pulling her hair (the struggle is real, I had a ponytail from 1991-1995, I get it) and got so pissy when she had to Get! A ! Job!  (why do all people on reality shows get so terrified when the J-O-B word is brought up?  most people I know have jobs, and I promise, we're all fine...)

And in this ep, when she asked her BF if she should contact Baby Daddy's fam, and he was like "it couldn't hurt" and then she almost killed him?  I could see it coming a mile away (not that I haven't been guilty of that myself, a few thousand times) and I was yelling at the TV, "daaanger!!" Rule number one, if you only want one answer, do not ask the question.

I think I didn't get it last season because Danae was so freaking terrible, but, yeah, no, not a fan. 

[configdotsys]

Brianna seems to get pissy when she has to do something and it all doesn't go the way she wants it. I'm assuming like any other bureaucracy, getting child support, housing assistance, food stamps, WIC, etc. takes some time to process. I don't know if they require an interview or what but she could have filed for these benefits as soon as they got there and found jobs around watching Braeson until these things came through. Then, if someone was working nights or whatever, they could try to find a day job and all be on the same schedule, or close to it.

There's an entitlement mentality to Brianna that is very aggravating. She has this air that she deserves an easy go of it for some weird reason. She doesn't seem very supportive of her boyfriend and evidently doesn't give any thought to the fact that he picked up and moved pretty far from his family and is probably hurting about that but trying to hide it so he doesn't look like-- in his mind-- a wuss.

She's a petulant child and throws tantrums any time she doesn't get her way or if everyone doesn't agree with her.

[IvySpice]

OMG I can't with the battered women. I used to think I wanted to work in domestic violence law, and I learned quick that I don't because the cases are ALL LIKE THIS. Kayla isn't financially dependent on Stephan...they don't live together...there's a vulnerable infant in danger...her mom and friends are providing the voice of sanity...and she still chooses to put her family and herself in the line of fire based on her deluded fantasies about this ugly, useless, violent man.

Pray to your higher powers that Kayla never turns up dead. That story is already beginning to unfold. The violence cranks up when she does anything to assert her rights, like seek child support. If Stephan had $8, we'd see a bunch of red roses next. That dent in the car bumper is going to be her head.

Quote

You know, you sometimes might say about a friend "I don't know why she stays with him. But when he turns on the charm...." 

I've seen lots of women with equally charmless, meritless assholes. Stephan is no departure from the norm in my experience.

Quote

I had to laugh when [Brianna] asked her boyfriend his opinion and then got pissed at his answer.

That was HI-larious! "Why would you even say that??" Because you asked him, dumbass! (And because he's right. Contacting the bio dad's family has nothing to do with the bio dad's right to a second chance or Brianna's duty to him. It has to do with BRAESON'S potential benefit from having grandparents in his life. Since you're on the verge of homelessness and dependent on public benefits, Brianna, you might look into whether there are some other adults in the world who could help support him.)

Edited November 10, 2018 by IvySpice

[Blissfool]

On 11/6/2018 at 2:03 PM, Pepper Mostly said:

I don't get it at all. He brings nothing to the table. He's not handsome, or charming, or intelligent, or witty, or kind, or charismatic. He's mean, stupid, ugly, and full of rage. I'd be embarrassed to be seen with such a loser. You know, you sometimes might say about a friend "I don't know why she stays with him. But when he turns on the charm...." This asshole wouldn't know charm if it bit him.

I know you're talking about Stephan, but you could easily be talking about Kyler. 

 

I don't think Kayla is dumb. I think she is scared. If she goes against Stephan she knows he is capable of killing her. An order of protection is just a piece of paper. It's just gonna infuriate him. For her peace of mind, it's better to just keep him on her "good side." Really, it's a double-edged sword. I used to live this many years ago. 

[IvySpice]

Quote

I think she is scared. If she goes against Stephan she knows he is capable of killing her. An order of protection is just a piece of paper. It's just gonna infuriate him. For her peace of mind, it's better to just keep him on her "good side." Really, it's a double-edged sword.

This is a perfectly reasonable theory, except that Kayla explained her own motivation, and I believe her. She told her mother why she didn't want the two-year order: because of her hope that Stephan will "get help" and change. If she'd told her mom she didn't want the order because she feared provoking Stephan, I'd believe her, but she didn't. 

Kayla's mom -- and especially her friend who witnessed the assault and called the police -- are just as aware as Kayla of Stephan's dangerousness. Yet they think the order of protection is a good idea. Why? Because they aren't concerned about what's best for Stephan, or Stephan's opportunity to be a father to his child, and Kayla is.

The order of protection is a tool to get Stephan locked up. That's the only way Kayla and Izaiah can be safe. The people around Kayla can see that; Kayla's still swimming in delusion and love, and she can't.

[configdotsys]

Just once, I would like to see Kayla grow a backbone, keep the order and say, "Listen, you fuck. No one is putting Izaiah in danger on my watch. You want to see him, get the fuck to some therapy and deal with your anger and then maybe we'll talk. Oh, and if you come around here again or harass me in any way, I'll call the cops. You will never touch me again." Instead, she tries to reason with him, drops the order, acts like a fucking wuss, makes excuses for his behavior and gets pissy when no one agrees with her. Her mother is worse, pussyfooting around and delicately disagreeing with her. No wonder Kayla puts up with this shit. Way to raise a dim bulb that takes abuse there, mom. Kayla has her entire life to look forward to these kinds of encounters with this loser. There comes a point when your bad situation becomes self-inflicted. If she was living with him with no family support and trapped, I could understand why a woman would stay in that situation but Kayla has every out possible and doesn't want to avail herself of them. That is all on her now. 

[ChristmasJones]

I know we are a snark forum, but Kayla, unfortunately, is not out of the norm in her behavior with Stephan.  I'm sure many here are familiar with the statistic that, on average, a woman will leave a domestic violence relationship seven times before leaving for good.  I wish that Kayla's mother would help her get some professional counseling.

[configdotsys]

On 11/10/2018 at 3:26 PM, ChristmasJones said:

I know we are a snark forum, but Kayla, unfortunately, is not out of the norm in her behavior with Stephan.  I'm sure many here are familiar with the statistic that, on average, a woman will leave a domestic violence relationship seven times before leaving for good.  I wish that Kayla's mother would help her get some professional counseling.

I hear you. But what makes me crazy is that this is not a situation in which a person has married the abuser, has kids, doesn't work and has no family around or means to getting out. She is also a minor so her mother-- if she chose to-- could lay down the law about seeing him.

Kayla has family and friends, does not live with him and yet is ready to let this go. Her mother seems to walk on egg shells around her when talking to her about this destructive relationship. If mom isn't outraged, it's no surprise that Kayla just takes things as they come. Mom behaved the same way during Stephan's psychotic tirade at HER home last season. I could not believe the lack of a reaction from both of them. I also have no doubt whatsoever that Kayla has seen this behavior plenty of times before. Her mother seems to be the "I better be careful with what I say because I don't want to upset her." Well, if that's the barometer you're using, it's no surprise at all why Kayla is the way she is. The mother is like the Mike Brady dealing with with Buddy Hinton's father, "I'll just reason with him. Calm, cool reasoning." How'd that work out?

That there is a baby involved means to me that all bets are off. Mom needs to tell Kayla that she will take the photos of her bruises and a tape of his tirade last season show them to CPS and ask for guardianship of Izaiah if she doesn't smarten up. Fine, Kayla, you think this dude is just swell, go hang out with him or whatever, but the kid stays here...

People may say that that's not the way to maintain a good relationship with your teen daughter but my way of thinking is that the mother was too busy being her friend that any type of discipline or authority she tries to put forth is viewed as cruel and mean. Eff that. Sometimes you need to get extreme to knock sense into a person. If Mom going for guardianship with physical proof of the danger of Stephan isn't enough to convince Kayla that this is serious, then Kayla can look forward to a life of bad decisions, struggling and always being miserable.

[akr]

Perhaps Kayla's mom was glad to finally be done being the single mom of someone too young to take her of herself and doesn't want guardianship of a baby. 

[configdotsys]

1 hour ago, akr said:

Perhaps Kayla's mom was glad to finally be done being the single mom of someone too young to take her of herself and doesn't want guardianship of a baby. 

Perhaps she was but she's not really free of anything. The baby lives with her. She pays for everything and I'd bet takes more care of him than Kayla does. So she essentially does all the duties of a parent with zero say. And as a bonus gets to watch her daughter shrug off being in danger of this psycho. 

[lezlers]

On ‎11‎/‎6‎/‎2018 at 11:02 AM, Dance4Life said:

Kayla won’t extend the protective order.  I bet all my Skittles that the Court won’t proceed in the assault case because Kayla won’t cooperate. 

 

Did Kayla neglect her son?  His hair in the front is as long as a toddler’s but the back is bald.  Now he needs to wear a helmet.  

LOL. His hair is like that BECAUSE of the helmet.   And he needed the helmet because of the way his head is shaped, not because of neglect.  Have you seen his bio dad's triangle head?  I don't think that could've been helped.