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S10.E04: Torn Between Two Lovers

paulvdb

By paulvdb
in Modern Family [V]

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VartanFan

VartanFan

7 hours ago, Jillybean said:
On 10/18/2018 at 6:57 PM, LeighLeigh said:

So who do think is going to die? Do we still think it’s Deedee?

 

I've always thought it was going to be Jay.  I ffwd the awkward lawyer-house stuff.  Dylan...no.  

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Angeleyes

Angeleyes

It wasn’t clear how long Manny’s girlfriend was planning to stay in the U.S. and/or live in Manny’s dorm room. At the end of the episode Manny was saying that he did some calligraphy for the school president and convinced him to change his mind about the girlfriend staying with him. She seems to want to get into acting. I’m not sure if she’s planning to enroll at the university and/or move to the L.A. area to try to break into the entertainment industry. 

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tribeca

tribeca

Arvin is the boyfriend your mother would choose for you.  Dylan is the boyfriend you would choose for yourself.  

   When Haley talked about what she saw in the future with both men the future with Arvin just didn’t seem like her. 

    Dylan seems to be doing okay for himself.  He has his own place and is putting himself through nursing school.  I think he has more going for him then Haley.    

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LeisureTime

LeisureTime

My only clear memory of Dylan from the earlier seasons involves his band playing music late at night in the Dunphy lawn and keeping Phil and Claire awake, so I don't remember just when nursing school became a dream of his.  I do question it a little bit, and wonder how many of Dylan's choices are made because they're what he wants to do versus thinking it's what he needs to do "to deserve" Haley. This whole dynamic where one person doesn't feel like they're worthy of another as themselves just never sits well with me, in any medium or fandom.

And sure, I know this is TV land, where Dylan and Haley are almost certain to live happily ever after, I just can't stop thinking about real-world resentment and whatnot,

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Mystery

Mystery

(edited)

I wonder if the show would be pushing the Dylan-Haley relationship if he hadn't been on the very first episode. It might seem, to the producers, like a great way to round out the series.

My favorite bit with Dylan in the past was him spinning the sign during "Connection Lost," and answering Claire's "Are you with Haley" with "In what way? Physically, romantically, maritally?" and him answering where is she with "Spiritually, geographically?" I think he even said that sign spinning was his career now. (It helps that I love that episode, anyway.)

Edited by Mystery
you don't close a parentheses with an underscore
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Ottis

Ottis

On 10/17/2018 at 9:07 PM, WhosThatGirl said:

Wow. Alone again in not liking this episode. Kind of funny that everyone thinks this season is super good. Really? What am I missing?

You're not alone. The contrived childless couple was something that might have happened 5 years ago, but not now. That "miscommunication" was silly. All it would have taken was a single question about their "kids" for it to be clear they meant dogs, and also, there is no way that the childless couple would willingly invite another couple with small kids to their home. 

I cannot fathom why Dylan is back, unless he is the one who dies.

Manny's annoying girlfriend felt like it came right from another show. You're the Worst, maybe? 

This show is just paddling in circles.

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WhosThatGirl

WhosThatGirl

1 hour ago, Ottis said:

You're not alone. The contrived childless couple was something that might have happened 5 years ago, but not now. That "miscommunication" was silly. All it would have taken was a single question about their "kids" for it to be clear they meant dogs, and also, there is no way that the childless couple would willingly invite another couple with small kids to their home. 

I cannot fathom why Dylan is back, unless he is the one who dies.

Manny's annoying girlfriend felt like it came right from another show. You're the Worst, maybe? 

This show is just paddling in circles.

Yeah. I feel the same way. A lot of the plots were kind of done before? Like Manny having a girlfriend who annoys Gloria in some way.. has been done many a time. As someone else said the Cam Mitch plot was done before. And Im not at all shocked that between Dylan and Arvin Haley chose Dylan. If it had been between Dylan and Andy, it would have been an actually been something to wonder about. I was just hoping that she wouldn’t chose anyone, actually, considering her options.

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seacliffsal

seacliffsal

For the last couple of episodes, it has hit me that Dylan offers way more than Hayley.  He has always had to fend for himself, and even though he may not be the brightest, he has tried to earn a living (t-shirts, Dude Ranch, Disneyland, etc.).  Hayley has never had to really try to support herself or make her own way as her parents have always financially supported her.  There may be an idea that because Hayley comes from an upper middle class family that somehow she is a more desirable partner.  I also think that all of the adults have babified their children to the point that they haven't had to really grow up.  Luke is the only one who found a job that he was good at and stayed with it.  I guess Hayley is still with the faux Goop company.  

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WhosThatGirl

WhosThatGirl

2 hours ago, seacliffsal said:

For the last couple of episodes, it has hit me that Dylan offers way more than Hayley.  He has always had to fend for himself, and even though he may not be the brightest, he has tried to earn a living (t-shirts, Dude Ranch, Disneyland, etc.).  Hayley has never had to really try to support herself or make her own way as her parents have always financially supported her.  There may be an idea that because Hayley comes from an upper middle class family that somehow she is a more desirable partner.  I also think that all of the adults have babified their children to the point that they haven't had to really grow up.  Luke is the only one who found a job that he was good at and stayed with it.  I guess Hayley is still with the faux Goop company.  

Didn’t Haley have a few moments that the show then destroyed/forgot about? She did super well with photography in college that she was picked to show her art in a show and enough that she was doing something online with photos and fashion? The show then forgot about it. Then she had her own company where she hired girls to make clubs and places look cool or something? I mean yeah.. not super great but she had like a thousand false starts because the show has a real problem figuring out how to navigate the kids as adults into the show. 

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Mrs. Hanson

Mrs. Hanson

On 10/21/2018 at 10:50 AM, tribeca said:

Arvin is the boyfriend your mother would choose for you.  Dylan is the boyfriend you would choose for yourself.  

I think Andy is one a father would pick for his daughter too.  I am biased, I know!!!  I would not pick Dylan for myself, though.....too dim.

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SnarkySheep

SnarkySheep

(edited)

Overall I enjoyed the episode (favorite line, paraphrased: "What did we spend all our money on??" "Lily." "Oh, yeah!")

But I agree with @seacliffsal - I'm having a REALLY hard time pretending that Haley is such a desirable woman that literally every single guy she's ever dated can't live without her. Yes, she's a pretty girl, but nothing extraordinary; and once you're past high school, people generally look for more than "OMG she's hot" in a partner. As I've stated on a previous thread, Haley has literally nothing going for her (college dropout, series of odd going-nowhere jobs, still lives at home, not even a very nice person most of the time.) But she's constantly portrayed as the world's best catch for any man...I mean, seriously, Dylan and Arvin fighting over her? SERIOUSLY??

Edited by SnarkySheep
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TheLastKidPicked

TheLastKidPicked

1 hour ago, SnarkySheep said:

But I agree with @seacliffsal - I'm having a REALLY hard time pretending that Haley is such a desirable woman that literally every single guy she's ever dated can't live without her. Yes, she's a pretty girl, but nothing extraordinary; and once you're past high school, people generally look for more than "OMG she's hot" in a partner. As I've stated on a previous thread, Haley has literally nothing going for her (college dropout, series of odd going-nowhere jobs, still lives at home, not even a very nice person most of the time.) But she's constantly portrayed as the world's best catch for any man...I mean, seriously, Dylan and Arvin fighting over her? SERIOUSLY??

I agree with both of you, but I'm willing to forgive the show because it led up to a great scene with Phil and Claire.  When Phil was explaining,  "I'm no help deciding because when I met your mom there was no choice" and he goes on to profess his love.  How could you not want Phil to be your husband?

And then Claire explaining how she fell in love with Phil.  And realizing it was for the same reasons Haley fell in love with Dylan.  

When this show gets it right-- it really gets it right.

  • Love 8
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qtpye

qtpye

On 10/25/2018 at 4:39 PM, SnarkySheep said:

Overall I enjoyed the episode (favorite line, paraphrased: "What did we spend all our money on??" "Lily." "Oh, yeah!")

But I agree with @seacliffsal - I'm having a REALLY hard time pretending that Haley is such a desirable woman that literally every single guy she's ever dated can't live without her. Yes, she's a pretty girl, but nothing extraordinary; and once you're past high school, people generally look for more than "OMG she's hot" in a partner. As I've stated on a previous thread, Haley has literally nothing going for her (college dropout, series of odd going-nowhere jobs, still lives at home, not even a very nice person most of the time.) But she's constantly portrayed as the world's best catch for any man...I mean, seriously, Dylan and Arvin fighting over her? SERIOUSLY??

Thank you. Hailey, is pretty, but so what? Why the hell would this supposedly brilliant professor be into her? Also, good-looking guys with bright futures would have tons of women after them and not be considered losers. An example is Chandler and Ross from Friends, who supposedly worshipped any attractive woman they could get because they were "nerds". In reality, they would be the cream of the dating crop in NYC. Also, Hailey is in LA, where attractive people are really not rare. The fact that every guy goes gaga for her is getting old, but they really have not developed the character in any other way. She might as well be Kelly from Saved by the Bell.

On 10/25/2018 at 6:49 PM, TheLastKidPicked said:

I agree with both of you, but I'm willing to forgive the show because it led up to a great scene with Phil and Claire.  When Phil was explaining,  "I'm no help deciding because when I met your mom there was no choice" and he goes on to profess his love.  How could you not want Phil to be your husband?

And then Claire explaining how she fell in love with Phil.  And realizing it was for the same reasons Haley fell in love with Dylan.  

When this show gets it right-- it really gets it right.

That was so sweet. I am also glad that the show finally admitted that even though Claire is smoking hot, that Phil is a pretty decent looking guy himself.

On 10/30/2018 at 10:19 AM, nowornever said:

I'm still struggling with Dylan being in nursing school.  There's just no way.  

Yes, I like Dylan, but there is no way he could get into nursing school unless he just seems socially dim but is actually quite academically gifted.

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WhosThatGirl

WhosThatGirl

The problem is as I said they gave Haley a ton of opportunities that made her seem like she had more going on, only then to retract it for th he reason that the show has to keep her in a box to keep her relevant to the show and the plots. Same with how they’ve shoehorned Alex to ALWAYS being around even though she’s in college(having her defer for a year because one summer she got mono).

The only one of the Dumphy kids who has a plausible reason for still living at home and going to school at this point is Luke. It always made sense that he maybe wouldn’t go to school right away and if he did, he would have probably had to live at home.

Alex.. is confusing. Even when she’s living at the dorms she’s still always around the house. Because the show needs her to be.

But haley.. I think they’ve always retracted anything to make her better because like alex the show needs her to be present and around. 

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jhlipton

jhlipton

On 11/1/2018 at 9:34 AM, qtpye said:

An example is Chandler and Ross from Friends, who supposedly worshipped any attractive woman they could get because they were "nerds". In reality, they would be the cream of the dating crop in NYC.

Chandler was a bit insecure but basically a good guy.  Ross... was Ross.  Ugh.  The idea that Aisha Tyler (yum!!!) would spend more than 5 minutes with him was dubious.

Living Single was much better in this regard (and so many others).  The two smartest people on the show, Max and Kyle, never had any problem getting dates, despite their acerbic personalities.  (I loved to watch them fight!!!) 

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