S05.E10: Celebrations

[Drogo]

It's been four weeks since three couples met at the altar and got married as strangers, and Pastor Calvin Roberson stops by to encourage them to celebrate their first holiday together, Labor Day.

[JAndy]

Anyone watching?

[humbleopinion]

Waiting on the Late Coast....

[Evil Queen]

West Coast here so not time yet. Surprised its so quiet. I know this season isn't as hopping around here as past ones but still there is usually something by now. 

[JocelynCavanaugh]

Yeah I'm gonna need Anthony to quit comparing his wife to a clam. 

The vocal fry on this show is excruciating and Cody is the worst by far. 

[Straycat80]

Honestly, I'm finding this season incredibly boring. I'm so tired of week after week of them talking about Cody and Danielle not having sex yet. 

I think I'm out until the last two episodes to see who stays married and who doesn't. 

[JAndy]

What is with Ashley twisting every word that the "experts" are making? They ask one question and she automatically assumes Anthony made a comment. What? She's really paranoid. 

[Mindthinkr]

Yes watching while writing this as it's boring. 

[okerry]

Just now, Mindthinkr said:

Yes watching while writing this as it's boring. 

and soooooooooooooo faaaaaayyyyyyyyykkkkkkkke - all of it. Jeez.

[crgirl412]

10 minutes ago, JAndy said:

What is with Ashley twisting every word that the "experts" are making? They ask one question and she automatically assumes Anthony made a comment. What? She's really paranoid. 

She is so paranoid!!!!  I'm sure she drives guys crazy- Anthony being driven the craziest!!!   

[JAndy]

I don't get why Ashley just didn't say to her sister that it was her day off and to deal with it herself. 

Or say to Anthony and his friend "I'm so sorry, a bunch of people called out sick and they need me there. Can we take a raincheck?" 

Dont just get up and leave! 

[Neurochick]

So did Ashley walk out on Anthony and their friends?  I don't think so.

This season is way too long.

[crgirl412]

Dear Cody & Danielle,

     For the love of God, you two have got to get it together!!!  Someone has to make a move but Cody won't because he has zero game and Danielle won't because she seems to be not as in to him as time goes on and she's comparing her past relationships to this.  She told him that she wants romance throughout their time together in everyday life to just be like normal married people and of course to help get them to the point of having coitus. 

Yes, I'm starting to use BBT language as this is getting just as awkward.     

[JocelynCavanaugh]

Sheila's platonic male friend is pretty cute. I wonder if Nate is feeling inferior...

[JAndy]

7 minutes ago, Neurochick said:

So did Ashley walk out on Anthony and their friends?  I don't think so.

This season is way too long.

She probably was on the phone with her sister for a half an hour or something. 

[ciaoformeow]

42 minutes ago, JAndy said:

What is with Ashley twisting every word that the "experts" are making? They ask one question and she automatically assumes Anthony made a comment. What? She's really paranoid. 

Seriously! 

I'm still in the middle of the episode but she's doing it again now with him. First, it was the expert said this so you must have told them that. Now this episode, anything he says she takes to the extreme. She's starting to seem a little crazy, to be honest. He just sits there eating being chill and you can see a little flicker of concern growing in his eyes. 

[Straycat80]

I live not far from where Cody and Danielle spent Labor Day. It was not at all cold that weekend. All I could think was why was Danielle wearing a stocking cap and flannel jacket?  Gawd, her and Cody are so depressing to watch.

I can't believe Ashley just up and left without saying a word to Anthony and her friends. 

Nate is showing his immaturity by the way he handled his feelings of jealousy towards Shelia best friend. 

Edited June 16, 2017 by Straycat80

[Primetimer]

It's the 'Celebrations' episode of Married At First Sight, but one couple doesn't have much to celebrate.

View the full article

[Evil Queen]

1 minute ago, JAndy said:

In this "after show" or whatever you call it with Jamie Otis, she was really deflecting. And saying things like "I need to support my family - and Anthony - so I needed to be at work" or something like that.  

 

I would have liked her to say "I should have told people where I was going". 

While I haven't seen it yet since I'm West Coast, I have to say I side eye so much with this show at this point on what is just tossed in for a "script" by production. Especially if they find 2 people that seem to hit it off and they think might not give them much in the way of drama. So you have rachel the creep twist some things up to plant a seed of doubt and then it just blooms from there in ways....then if its still not enough let's have her run out on people over work. More so in a day and age when we all have a cellphone on us that we can send a quick text if nothing else in the moment. Plus production always wants to play the game of messing with things to make it look different than it was to begin with (ie Danielle wanting sex with Cody when really she wasn't). I think I'm starting to feel jaded when it comes to this show. 

[Snarklepuss]

I honestly think Danielle would have had sex with Cody by now if he wasn't so awkward about just about everything.  Man, it's nerve wracking enough having sex for the first time with a confident guy let alone with him making things even more nerve wracking.  Danielle should just have a few drinks and ravage him.  I mean seriously now, if he's not going to do it, someone has to!  Stop talking about it non-stop, that only kills any potential romance.  And pastor Cal needs to stop putting pressure on Danielle to have sex with him.  She's already feeling enough pressure as it is without him to make her feel even more.  Another romance killer!  You can't force someone to find feelings for another person!  I understand why Danielle is talking about things happening "organically" - She wants it to be genuine, not just because it's expected of her.  Geesh, this show is beginning to remind me of that zoo documentary on "Animal Planet" where the zookeepers keep checking on the bird couple to see if they've finally "done it", and then realizing that all that constant observation is probably the major reason they haven't done it!

That said, I still have a nagging feeling in my gut that even if Danielle did take the bull by the horns and call his bluff, he'd wuss out on her and wouldn't be able to complete the task.  Or if he did it would still be a very awkward experience.  I think perhaps she senses that and is just saving herself that kind of embarrassment.  She senses the immaturity with him.  She's been there and done that and doesn't want to wear that t shirt again.  That's why she's mentioning the past relationships.  I don't think she has any major unresolved issues like pastor Cal was trying to latch onto - I believe her that she has learned from her past relationships and this is one of those things she's learned to spot.

[Snarklepuss]

2 hours ago, JAndy said:

What is with Ashley twisting every word that the "experts" are making? They ask one question and she automatically assumes Anthony made a comment. What? She's really paranoid. 

Ugh, Anthony is a saint.  Seriously, I think Ashley would even drive a saint insane.  She is so insecure that she constantly twists everything around to the worst case scenario.  Anthony is obviously a great guy and she's treating him like some shady character she picked up in a bar!  I understand this is a new relationship and she has to learn to trust him but he's obviously a decent guy so what's her problem?  She seems to be a shit stirrer.  She reminds me of a friend of mine that even when he gets told by the car mechanic that his car is OK he constantly magnifies every little non-issue like he WANTS them to find something wrong with it!  Dude, leave well enough alone!

That said, I think the scene in the restaurant where she disappears was partially messed with to make it look like she just disappeared.  They didn't follow up with it to show her coming back to the table but I'm sure that in real life she did.  When Anthony went out to look for her she was probably in the ladies' room or something.  Between Ashley and the show they've managed to create problems in that relationship where none exist!
 

2 hours ago, Straycat80 said:

Nate is showing his immaturity by the way he handled his feelings of jealousy towards Shelia best friend. 

Yep, he sure did.  I think he had a little too much to drink which made it even more embarrassing.  But Donnay sure is handsome.  I have had many male platonic friends but none THAT handsome or they wouldn't be friends for long, LOL.  I understand the jealousy just not the way Nate dealt with it, and I'm sure he has nothing to worry about.  Let's hope this isn't the "real" Nate coming out here.  I know I can't be alone in holding my breath hoping this kind of behavior doesn't eventually become a trend.  I actually like him and Sheila together.  I like how they can have fun together with 'Rique.  They have a good sense of humor together, which is important.  They have become my favorite couple this season - Didn't see that coming at all, but it's very refreshing.  I am still holding my breath and crossing my fingers as I say that!

[Agnetha]

Danielle is obnoxious and a waste of time. I wish they would stopped recruiting people who go to the show for the adventure and would only stick to a partner if he/she met their very narrow-minded requirements. For a yogi, she is super judgemental.

[Snarklepuss]

6 minutes ago, Agnetha said:

Danielle is obnoxious and a waste of time. I wish they would stopped recruiting people who go to the show for the adventure and would only stick to a partner if he/she met their very narrow-minded requirements. For a yogi, she is super judgemental.

I doubt Danielle would have had any problem with Cody's brother.  Even though he's younger he looks like he knows how to handle a woman with no problem!

[Agnetha]

It's not about Cody, it's about Danielle herself. 

[Snarklepuss]

5 minutes ago, Agnetha said:

It's not about Cody, it's about Danielle herself. 

Every time a woman doesn't have those feelings for a guy on this show she gets called too picky.  I don't think Danielle's requirements are too picky or that she's not over former boyfriends, I just don't think Cody is going to do it for her.  He wouldn't do it for ME and I'm far from narrow-minded in what I find attractive in a man.  I'm just tired of the women getting blamed for wanting what they want.  Just because Cody isn't an axe murderer or whatever doesn't mean she's wrong for not wanting him that way.

[Agnetha]

4 minutes ago, Snarklepuss said:

Every time a woman doesn't have those feelings for a guy on this show she gets called too picky.  I don't think Danielle's requirements are too picky or that she's not over former boyfriends, I just don't think Cody is going to do it for her.  He wouldn't do it for ME and I'm far from narrow-minded in what I find attractive in a man.  I'm just tired of the women getting blamed for wanting what they want.  Just because Cody isn't an axe murderer or whatever doesn't mean she's wrong for not wanting him that way.

Please don't generalize just because you disagree with my view of Danielle.

I liked Heather and even Ashley I could understand at times. Nobody expects Danielle to fall in love with him. But if you know exactly what you want, don't go on this show. And if you do and don't like the person you are paired up with, be honest about it instead of getting hang up on some minor stuff and pretending that is the root cause of your anger when it isn't. I'm older and more self-confident than Cody, but even I would crumble under her judgemental eye. 

[Snarklepuss]

Just now, Agnetha said:

Please don't generalize just because you disagree with my view of Danielle.

I liked Heather and even Ashley I could understand at times. Nobody expects Danielle to fall in love with him. But if you know exactly what you want, don't go on this show. And if you do and don't like the person you are paired up with, be honest about it instead of getting hang up on some minor stuff and pretending that is the root cause of your anger when it isn't. I'm older and more self-confident than Cody, but even I would crumble under her judgemental eye. 

My point is I don't think it's fair to say that Danielle is that narrow in what she wants.  Take me for example.  I said early on this season that I found nothing attractive about Anthony but that if he turned out to be a decent guy I might change my mind.  I really didn't see that happening, though, because I originally found him so unattractive physically.  I also started this season saying I found Cody attractive and I was fully intending that to go on all season.  Now if I were put on a desert island with the two of them I would choose Anthony with no reservations and actually find him attractive.  He has nice "man" qualities.  He doesn't have to be a "he-man" or be drop dead handsome, just have that certain somethin' going on, which I think he does.  Can't really explain that.  It's visceral.  And I don't doubt that with the right guy Danielle might have come around that way too.  But Cody has conducted himself in such a way as to be a total cold shower to any interest Danielle might have for him.  Even I feel that way about him right through the TV.  I can't judge her as being too picky in the face of that.  IMO she is acting like just about every woman including myself that I have ever known.  I can't see her as judgmental nor would I feel like I'd crumble under her judgment!  I could blow her over with a feather!

[Evil Queen]

Danielle is using whatever she can as an excuse instead of just being honest and straight forward that she is not attracted to Cody. They need to not have sex at all. It needs to not be pushed on either of them IMO. The fact is Danielle is not going to feel "romantic" about Cody and she has stated so. They need to quite the edit like she wants him when she doesn't. If Danielle was REALLY going to put the work in towards the marriage she would haven't have been turning him down when he has tried to have sex with her and would have not been nitpicking every little damn thing he does or doesn't do. No matter what there is not "romance" every day in a marriage. It is sure coming off as she went into this looking at this like it was just another "adventure" than something serious. She is seriously lacking in communicating when she isn't being on honest that she just is not into Cody in that manner. 

I think once Ashley gets to know Anthony more and that he is being straightforward with her when needed that she will learn its all good. We have no clue what her past relationships have been like but it seems like maybe they weren't very honest with here on things or could have been later down the line and she felt misled. I get it. I've been there. It took me a while to believe my husband after the crap I had gone through. Yet once I realized it wasn't the same as the past ones it was all ok. It doesn't help how rachel was with her and twisted shit to put that doubt there. Her disappearing, they obviously knew something was going on with her work. I would bet if she didn't come back that she had sent a text or called as soon as she could. Yet let's instead twist it to something else for the show because they aren't giving them drama the producers want for tv. SMH

Sheila needs to watch it with Nate. If he is that way about this guy as her friend there is issues that will come up always I bet. You can tell the booze had been flowing at that gathering though. I still have side eye going with that one. 

 

2 minutes ago, Snarklepuss said:

I'm just tired of the women getting blamed for wanting what they want.  Just because Cody isn't an axe murderer or whatever doesn't mean she's wrong for not wanting him that way.

No one has said she was wrong for not being into him but wrong for not being honest with Cody on it. I don't even see all the women blamed for things on this show when they are not wanting it. I was one of the ones that stood up for Heather last season because she got the major shit end of the deal. Sonia, I hated she was pushed into sticking that crap out when she was saying her gut was telling her otherwise. Yet with this I think Cody got the shit end. Its something we just disagree on in that manner this season. I just know I rather not see them have sex at all and its better they didn't just do it just because. 

5 minutes ago, Agnetha said:

Nobody expects Danielle to fall in love with him. But if you know exactly what you want, don't go on this show. And if you do and don't like the person you are paired up with, be honest about it instead of getting hang up on some minor stuff and pretending that is the root cause of your anger when it isn't. I'm older and more self-confident than Cody, but even I would crumble under her judgemental eye. 

Exactly!! If you go in this thinking you will hit it off right then and there or "feel it" right off the bat you will have a 50/50 chance for disappointment. It would be best to be honest about it all instead of what is going on. All she has been doing is nitpicking anything and everything IMO and its going to take the toll on anyone in that situation. I know it would myself if I was having that happen to me. 

 

2 minutes ago, Snarklepuss said:

to any interest Danielle might have for him.

She hasn't had any though. She has basically said more than one time she wasn't feeling that romance/chemistry for him she hoped to. IMO that says she is not interested at all. She has done nothing to say she was even the slightest bit interested in Cody at all IMO. I think she has done the opposite in hopes he would just say he wasn't. 

[Snarklepuss]

1 minute ago, Evil Queen said:

Danielle is using whatever she can as an excuse instead of just being honest and straight forward that she is not attracted to Cody. They need to not have sex at all. It needs to not be pushed on either of them IMO. The fact is Danielle is not going to feel "romantic" about Cody and she has stated so. They need to quite the edit like she wants him when she doesn't. If Danielle was REALLY going to put the work in towards the marriage she would haven't have been turning him down when he has tried to have sex with her and would have not been nitpicking every little damn thing he does or doesn't do. No matter what there is not "romance" every day in a marriage. It is sure coming off as she went into this looking at this like it was just another "adventure" than something serious. She is seriously lacking in communicating when she isn't being on honest that she just is not into Cody in that manner.

First of all, I think she HAS been honest with Cody about her lack of feelings "that way" for him - In fact, I don't think she could have been more open about them than in this episode.  I wonder how that could be missed or misconstrued as what she has been saying is very clear to me. And that's what Cody's so upset about - That she was honest with him and he doesn't know what to do with that knowledge.  He's very disappointed but doesn't seem to know what to do to turn it around.  Especially when the pastor is putting pressure on HER to change her feelings.  That kind of pressure usually does not work, in fact, just the opposite.

Secondly, I don't think someone should feel forced to have sex with someone or be told they're not "putting in the work" to make the marriage work.  IMO forcing herself to have sex can only hurt any potential chance of success for the relationship.  I just can't get on board with that kind of thinking.  When people don't feel like having sex with someone I think the LAST thing they should do is force themselves to have it or let anyone else make them feel like they're not doing right by not having it.  And IMO she doesn't OWE him sex even if she did marry him.  If she doesn't feel it, she doesn't feel it.  She is under no obligation to feel like having sex with him or get told she's failing in the relationship.  I can't put those kinds of expectations on people.  I'm sure she signed up for this hoping to be matched with someone she could feel that way about.  I really doubt she was cavalier about this experience.  IMO she doesn't strike me as the type.

I realized after watching one of the Jamie Otis shows that Danielle is an only child, plus I'm sure she's an introvert.  I am both.  I realize we can be misunderstood.  Story of my life.

[Evil Queen]

19 minutes ago, Snarklepuss said:

Secondly, I don't think someone should feel forced to have sex with someone or be told they're not "putting in the work" to make the marriage work.  IMO forcing herself to have sex can only hurt any potential chance of success for the relationship.  I just can't get on board with that kind of thinking.  When people don't feel like having sex with someone I think the LAST thing they should do is force themselves to have it or let anyone else make them feel like they're not doing right by not having it.  And IMO she doesn't OWE him sex even if she did marry him.  If she doesn't feel it, she doesn't feel it.  She is under no obligation to feel like having sex with him or get told she's failing in the relationship.  I can't put those kinds of expectations on people.  I'm sure she signed up for this hoping to be matched with someone she could feel that way about.  I really doubt she was cavalier about this experience.  IMO she doesn't strike me as the type.

You do know I said they should NOT have sex at all. I have said this for a while now while many others were saying he should be trying harder and pushing it because she was wanting it. IMO I think its best they didn't yet and shouldn't at all. Why shouldn't someone be told they are not putting the work into the a marriage when they are not? She got married. She has to expect to put some work into it or be honest and say its not going to work at all instead of saying she will try to do this or that. Its really just pointless though because its not going to make her change her mind on him at all. Which is fine but she needs to say that instead of she will try to do something to see if it can work. Don't string him along and give him a glimmer of hope when its obviously pointless. Obviously this is just stuff we will not agree on though in the end. Last I will say on it though. 

[Racj82]

I feel like the editing is leaning in on the sex aspect with Cody and Danielle but I think that Cody is longing for a romantic connection period. The physical connection his brother has right now with the friend is something he's longing for just as much as anything else. 

At the end of the day, neither person is fully at fault between the two if them. It's not a either or situation. It almost never is on this show. You can't make something work just because it's what you want. It's a feeling. But, Danielle just isn't feeling it. Cody is trying which makes him come off better but I can't blame either party for mentally checking out. Forcing a connection won't solve the problem. 

It's difficult on the Danielle side because it's look like she's basically keeping Codys hopes up by not just shutting the whole thing down but who wants to be that person? You can understand someone basically just faking it until the experiment is done. It makes you look like you tried and it just couldn't work. Neither person is bad for what they are doing. I don't think there is any malicious intent. Just a shitty situation.

It is also true neither one of them should have been in the show. Cody needs more time to figure out who he is and wants to be. Danielle has her eyes set too closely on specifics in a mate for this to work unless the matchmaker can tick all her boxes. Nothing wrong with wanting what you want but she strikes as the list type. He must have or do this, this and this. No wiggle room. Too hard to reach the expectations. 

[LennieBriscoe]

I don't find Cody attractive, with his adolescent voice and tragic stubble. He keeps speaking of marriage and being a husband in very weird distancing language, like the concept is foreign to him. I can't see Danielle's choosing to stay with Cody. 

Anthony is getting fat; his arms tell the tale. Sis is trying to wreck things. 

Nate, be cool. BFF is not a threat, IYKWIM. But your mother? PITA who needs to be read the Biblical Riot Act, aka Genesis 2:24---"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh." (KJV)

[Snarklepuss]

see post below....

Edited June 16, 2017 by Snarklepuss

[bichonblitz]

10 hours ago, Straycat80 said:

I can't believe Ashley just up and left without saying a word to Anthony and her friends. 

She said in the after show that she did leave, she blamed it on the fact that she feels so much responsibility for the "family business". I get it, when you are the owner/manager of a business, it never stops. But as usual, no apology from Ashley for leaving her husband high and dry with their friends. I have a high stress job and sometimes I have to stop what I'm doing when I'm off work to handle it. It's how she did it that I find unacceptable. Why couldn't she just go back to the table and explain that she had an emergency at work and had to leave. Unless it's crazy editing, and that's not really how it went down, the whole thing was weird. I know I certainly wouldn't want to be with someone that disappears like that. I guess we will see the continuation of that scene next week. 

10 hours ago, Straycat80 said:

Nate is showing his immaturity by the way he handled his feelings of jealousy towards Shelia best friend. 

The party looked like a lot of fun, everybody was laughing and having a great time. Then Nate ruined it. Too much alcohol will do that to a person. Maybe Nate is one of those people that get mean and mouthy when they have too much to drink. 

Cody and Danielle- how uncomfortable was it watching the Codester's brother and Danielle's friend hanging all over each other? Cody and Danielle were not even sitting next to each other and yet the brother and friend were sitting on top of each other, lol! 

[MrSmith]

11 hours ago, JAndy said:

What is with Ashley twisting every word that the "experts" are making? They ask one question and she automatically assumes Anthony made a comment. What? She's really paranoid. 

She's not so much paranoid as she is insecure and vastly over-thinking things. She seems to be waiting for Anthony to leave her and is working overtime to give him reasons to cut and run.

[Snarklepuss]

6 hours ago, Evil Queen said:

You do know I said they should NOT have sex at all. I have said this for a while now while many others were saying he should be trying harder and pushing it because she was wanting it. IMO I think its best they didn't yet and shouldn't at all. Why shouldn't someone be told they are not putting the work into the a marriage when they are not? She got married. She has to expect to put some work into it or be honest and say its not going to work at all instead of saying she will try to do this or that. Its really just pointless though because its not going to make her change her mind on him at all. Which is fine but she needs to say that instead of she will try to do something to see if it can work. Don't string him along and give him a glimmer of hope when its obviously pointless. Obviously this is just stuff we will not agree on though in the end. Last I will say on it though. 

I don't think Danielle can win in this situation.  I think the show puts a lot of pressure on them to stick with it and "try" to make things work, and I think she is in earnest about that which is why she hasn't left the show.  She does not strike me as an Atlanta Ashley who was FOS and lying through her teeth to the camera.  I don't even think Danielle herself can explain why she doesn't feel for him, she just doesn't.  The "manly man" thing was a weak explanation and the best she could do to verbalize something that is very hard for her to figure out.

The sad truth is you can't force yourself to have feelings.  They either happen or they don't.  And IMO Danielle shouldn't be trashed because she doesn't have feelings for a guy who just isn't doing it for her, especially when I can see why.  It's not even about his physical appearance for her or for me - She is constantly saying that he's a good looking guy.  It's something about him as a person that is a huge turn-off to her sexually speaking.  I feel it myself so I can't judge her for not having those feelings for him.  I think he is a good looking guy but everything about his body language and personality says "wet noodle", not "sexually attractive".  So I just can't feel that way about him at all.  In fact, he is in the minus column for me!  I think Danielle is hoping that her feelings will turn around, but to be honest, if they're not there in the beginning, the longer it goes without them showing up the more hopeless it gets.  I don't think she is lying to herself or the camera, she just can't change something that is either there or not.  If Cody had any self confidence in himself as a man he would be up to the challenge and not give in to feeling weak and rejected.  But he is and he's only making it worse for himself.  It's not uncommon for a guy to have an interest in a woman that doesn't feel "that way" about him, but I think if it's ever going to happen he can't act all victimized and run to his mommy about it or it's only going to be a further turn-off for her.

I know I have told this story before but Mr. Snarkle liked me at a distance for a long time and I did not share the feeling.  I knew he liked me but I didn't feel "that way" about him.  Fortunately he didn't get all vocal fry and "poor me" about it, nor did he pressure me.  He stayed in my group of friends like nothing happened until one day magically "poof", I suddenly found my feelings for him.  Unfortunately this show is a pressure cooker that can only ruin things at a stage of a relationship when they can go either way.  It's only when the pursuing partner has hung back and not acted oppressive in one way or the other that the non-interested party has had a change of heart.  Pastor Cal is not doing them any favors by continuing to put pressure on both of them, IMO.

[gonecrackers]

I won't be able to get to this until later but the comments are interesting, as always.

Cody can't be that much of an insecure mess as he opened his own gym, & went on a TV show to marry a stranger & had no idea how it would turn out. He took a huge risk & that does take some guts (or stupidity, depending on how you look at it- & that would include all of the participants).

It doesn't mean he isn't insecure in ways, but I think we all have stuff. I also think we have stuff that gets brought out, for the better or for the worse, depending on who we are with & the situation. I think the logistics of being on this show, then dealing with Danielle's expectations, & the 'experts' interference is bringing out the worst for him, so of course he's not looking good at all. I can give him the benefit of the doubt.

I find Danielle irritating for some reasons, but I would never say it's okay to pressure someone to have sex with someone they're not feeling it with; that's not right at all & I fully support Danielle's decision to hang back... (as I fully supported Heather leaving Derek & gave her credit for even sticking out the honeymoon with him, but I won't go there!).

Not sure what's up with Nate - maybe too many drinks, from what I'm reading here, or maybe editing? Maybe he was told to lay it on thick with the platonic friend. Personally, I don't agree with opposite sex friends for marrieds, as I've heard too much happening with that; opens too many doors that shouldn't be opened & too many people do go through those doors. That's my personal feeling & I understand if Nate has an issue, but it sounds like he handled it crappy, which might have just been for dramatic effect.

As for Ashley, sounds like she's acting like everything I've thought she is - needy, insecure, selfish & bratty. However, I will give a bit in that of course the show will spin things & edit to get what they want. However, the less you give them to work with, the less they can do. It sounds like she's obliging, & that could just be a bit of 'real' coming through.

[Snarklepuss]

9 minutes ago, gonecrackers said:

Cody can't be that much of an insecure mess as he opened his own gym, & went on a TV show to marry a stranger & had no idea how it would turn out. He took a huge risk & that does take some guts (or stupidity, depending on how you look at it- & that would include all of the participants).

It doesn't mean he isn't insecure in ways, but I think we all have stuff. I also think we have stuff that gets brought out, for the better or for the worse, depending on who we are with & the situation. I think the logistics of being on this show, then dealing with Danielle's expectations, & the 'experts' interference is bringing out the worst for him, so of course he's not looking good at all. I can give him the benefit of the doubt.

I definitely think that Cody's confidence issues have mostly to do with women.  In other areas of his life he obviously has more confidence.  Some guys in my experience can only feel confident with a woman if she is all over them.  They're not up to the challenge of someone that isn't into them initially and it makes their man-confidence crumble, which is what I think is happening here with him and making him look worse.  That's just based on my own experience!  Of course, I don't think Danielle is purposely trying to make him feel that way which is why I won't judge her for it.

[Empress1]

16 minutes ago, MrSmith said:

She's not so much paranoid as she is insecure and vastly over-thinking things. She seems to be waiting for Anthony to leave her and is working overtime to give him reasons to cut and run.

Agreed, and it's annoying and tiring to watch. I had a roommate who was like this, constantly asking about what this meant or that meant with every guy, and projecting all her insecurities onto their very innocuous comments. One time our other roommate was like "He's with you until he's not, can you just chill?" and she was like "YOU THINK HE'S NOT GOING TO BE WITH ME?" She was confident in other areas but not about men. (She did find someone; she's married with a toddler now.) Anthony is a good dude and their problems, such as they are, are small. She can just ride the wave of being in a new relationship that seems to be going well and stop waiting for the other shoe to drop. 

It was rude as hell of her to leave without saying anything. Hell, even send a text as you're walking away - "So sorry, emergency at work, gotta run. I'll make it up to you." I think even that would be tacky but at least it's something.

I found that scene with Danielle and Pastor Cal kind of sad because the truth is, Danielle isn't projecting her issues with her exes onto Cody; she's just not that into him. It has nothing to do with her exes. That's not the problem. It's just not there for her. I commend Cody for saying that he feels like he's not getting anywhere with her; he isn't, and I don't think he's going to. Danielle is in a tough spot. What's the honorable thing to do? Cut bait now? Have a conversation off-camera and try to get through the 8 weeks, then agree to part on decision day? She definitely shouldn't be pressured to have sex with him; that might give him hope and I don't think there is any.

Nate needs to chill about Sheila's friend. They're friends. I think it would be shitty of her to drop him because Nate is insecure. I like the way she's playing it - she's trying to include them both so Nate can see there's nothing to worry about. He came across badly there.

[gonecrackers]

5 minutes ago, Snarklepuss said:

18 minutes ago, gonecrackers said:

Cody can't be that much of an insecure mess as he opened his own gym, & went on a TV show to marry a stranger & had no idea how it would turn out. He took a huge risk & that does take some guts (or stupidity, depending on how you look at it- & that would include all of the participants).

It doesn't mean he isn't insecure in ways, but I think we all have stuff. I also think we have stuff that gets brought out, for the better or for the worse, depending on who we are with & the situation. I think the logistics of being on this show, then dealing with Danielle's expectations, & the 'experts' interference is bringing out the worst for him, so of course he's not looking good at all. I can give him the benefit of the doubt.

I definitely think that Cody's confidence issues have mostly to do with women.  In other areas of his life he obviously has more confidence.  Some guys in my experience can only feel confident with a woman if she is all over them.  They're not up to the challenge of someone that isn't into them initially and it makes their man-confidence crumble, which is what I think is happening here with him and making him look worse.  That's just based on my own experience!  Of course, I don't think Danielle is purposely trying to make him feel that way which is why I won't judge her for it.

I think that's pretty much what I was trying to say but I think it's not just Danielle, or women in general, but the whole situation that is bad for him. I don't know what he's like with other women so I can't judge that. But I do think if someone is comfortable they can be a completely different person.

4 minutes ago, Empress1 said:

Anthony is a good dude and their problems, such as they are, are small. She can just ride the wave of being in a new relationship that seems to be going well and stop waiting for the other shoe to drop. 

She could ruin any relationship by tiring the guy out on this behavior, or just bolt herself from her own insecurities. This is why if something doesn't change I don't see a good long term situation for them.

[gonecrackers]

9 minutes ago, MrSmith said:

I disagree. If you're committed to your significant other and your relationship - whether that's a dating relationship, engagement, or marriage - and you're not looking to "better deal" your significant other, then there's no reason why a friend of the opposite sex would pose any danger to your relationship. If you're committed, then you'll behave as though your S.O. is right there even when they're not, enforce boundaries proactively, and even terminate friendships if the friend doesn't respect the boundaries you've set.

Well definitely, one needs to be ready to do just that. It's not something that often happens though, unfortunately. Many relationships are strong enough, but then again, others are not, then again, others thought they were then they weren't. But again, that's my $.02.

Either way this is about Nate & his behavior, which I haven't seen yet. But I would never say to challenge the friend in a crappy way like that as it isn't doing Nate any favors for himself or their marriage.

Edited June 16, 2017 by gonecrackers

[Empress1]

10 minutes ago, MrSmith said:

I disagree. If you're committed to your significant other and your relationship - whether that's a dating relationship, engagement, or marriage - and you're not looking to "better deal" your significant other, then there's no reason why a friend of the opposite sex would pose any danger to your relationship. If you're committed, then you'll behave as though your S.O. is right there even when they're not, enforce boundaries proactively, and even terminate friendships if the friend doesn't respect the boundaries you've set.

And from what I've seen, Sheila is doing just that. She made a point to say to her friend that she wanted to include Nate in their activities, and given that she talked to Nate about how his friends in relationships acted in the club, I think it's a safe bet that she'd make a point to act right. And honestly, based on their interactions, I see no reason for Nate to worry. I saw two friends having dinner. I don't think her friend is interested in her, I don't think she's interested in him - for all we know, he's in a relationship.

[humbleopinion]

Danielle has underestimated Cody's ability to get sympathy.

Danielle's purpose to be on the show was to generate eyeball traffic on her SM platforms(she was thinking long term, knowing the episodes would be shown in the future when she was out doing Bali yoga, representing over priced products, whatever she could line up in between shooting the episodes and air time to take advantage of being connected to M@FS) and find love... if not, like ...for a few months.

She lost her grasp of the situation during the honeymoon when Cody pulled away from her and wasn't going to be her puppet.

A month in, Cody is in charge and he is just driving the bus over her and putting it in reverse to drive over her again.

The Codester lowering the boom when he implied that she is sabotaging the marriage, wanting it to fail.

Even though he looks like a mess, sounds like  bacon cooking on a cast iron skillet, he controls Danielle... leaving her sputtering about sparks and wind taken out of her sails....

[MrSmith]

13 minutes ago, Empress1 said:

And from what I've seen, Sheila is doing just that. She made a point to say to her friend that she wanted to include Nate in their activities, and given that she talked to Nate about how his friends in relationships acted in the club, I think it's a safe bet that she'd make a point to act right. And honestly, based on their interactions, I see no reason for Nate to worry. I saw two friends having dinner. I don't think her friend is interested in her, I don't think she's interested in him - for all we know, he's in a relationship.

Yeah, absolutely. Sheila's doing nothing wrong. Nate is being the asshat here. I personally do not understand why all these people have such a hard time with trust. I've been cheated on before and, in spite of that, I still gave girlfriends my trust from the start. After all, they haven't done anything that gives me any reason not to trust them and relationships fall apart fast without trust. So I always trusted them until they gave me a reason to start doubting them. To my mind, that's the easiest route to navigate; I think it's much harder to be suspicious and distrustful from the outset, especially because how does the other person win your trust then? You can't prove a negative and they spend most of their time during the day away from you. For me, this is why it's so silly for Nate to be such a doucecanoe about Donnay.

[Mr. Miner]

Oh Nate! you were being so smoove up til now.

[humbleopinion]

N8 must have been watching When Harry Met Sally...you cannot be friends with the opposite sex...you always want to bang them...

Donnay does threaten N8 because he knows Sheila better.

The fact that Donnay holds such a dear place in Sheila's heart AND they have never had sex.... bugs N8.

[humbleopinion]

Nice contrast of how Danielle was dressed on her trip to the country...knit hat, long sleeves, thick jacket versus Angie's flimsy summer top, sandals because she has Charlie's lap and body heat keeping her warm and toasty.

Angie... all smiles, comfortable with the brothers' friends and the outing, giving Charlie a lap dance in front of the cameras and the group versus Danielle's body language, folding into herself just like the  chair she is sitting in.

[Palomar]

Quote

 I commend Cody for saying that he feels like he's not getting anywhere with her; he isn't, and I don't think he's going to. Danielle is in a tough spot. What's the honorable thing to do? Cut bait now? Have a conversation off-camera and try to get through the 8 weeks, then agree to part on decision day? She definitely shouldn't be pressured to have sex with him; that might give him hope and I don't think there is any.

 

You might as well be truthful instead of acting like things are going well.  Do they really even share the same bed like they are showing?  Maybe if Cody just stops trying and treats her like a roommate the rest of the way, it will shake her up enough to rethink their situation.  I sure hope we are done with hearing about "the spark".  But, maybe it was just not meant to be.   If they are sleeping in the same bed, you would think it would just happen some morning or something., "organically".

[humbleopinion]

Producer influenced/ created the whole Ashley leaving the outing for work drama.

Her bar staff didn't show up for work and she needed to go to work.

Ashley probably told a producer and the crew to tell Anthony she had to go and she left instead of having the camera crew follow her back up to the rooftop annoying the other customers in the Sausage Factory.

Producer wanting a little drama to add spice to the bland Petta/D'Amico soup directed Anthony to go out to the street and look for Ash.

He'll look at his phone and see that she texted him and that will be the logical ending...or she will emerge from the ladies room and be back with the group when he returns from the street.

Nothing burgers with their beers...or to keep in theme with the restaurant nothing sausage sammies with their craft brews...

Edited June 16, 2017 by humbleopinion
more nonsense

[bichonblitz]

23 minutes ago, humbleopinion said:

Ashley probably told a producer and the crew to tell Anthony she had to go and she left instead of having the camera crew follow her back up to the rooftop annoying the other customers in the Sausage Factory.

Supposedly she went downstairs to get drinks, the cameras were not on her at that time. The camera's were on Anthony and friends upstairs. She should have gone back to the rooftop herself. It's her husband. And their friends. How long would it have taken her to do that? It was rude IMHO. 

Edited June 16, 2017 by bichonblitz