Sex And The City - General Discussion

[Ms Blue Jay]

Carrie's so damn self absorbed.  Remember when Aidan screams "You broke my heart!"  Her response is to run away like a child, LOL.

Carrie's entire personality is when Ross does whatever he wants but doesn't like when other people treat him the same.  LOL.

Every single event is seen through Carrie's lens: But how does this affect me?  Aidan is brokenhearted because I cheated on him.  But how does this affect me?  Natasha doesn't want to look at my face because I helped destroy her marriage.  But how does this affect me?  One of the most self-involved protagonists in pop culture.

 

Edited July 10, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[Avabelle]

37 minutes ago, Spartan Girl said:

Or be baffled that Nina Katz, the first woman Aidan dated after he broke his heart TWICE, didn’t like her

That’s a completely reasonable statement but I’ll always defend Carrie when it comes to Nina Katz. Because I thought Nina Katz seemed like an asshole. 

[Scarlett45]

18 minutes ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Carrie's so damn self absorbed.  Remember when Aidan screams "You broke my heart?"  Her response is to run away like a child, LOL.

Carrie's entire personality is when Ross does whatever he wants but doesn't like when other people treat him the same.  LOL.

Every single event is seen through Carrie's lens: But how does this affect me?  Aidan is brokenhearted because I cheated on him.  But how does this affect me?  Natasha doesn't want to look at my face because I helped destroy her marriage.  But how does this affect me?  One of the most self-involved protagonists in pop culture.

 

Another prime example of this- Carrie being upset that Charlotte didnt offer her THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS as a downpayment on her apartment. THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS.

I personally, do not loan anyone money. If a friend is in a rough spot, and I have extra to spare, I will GIFT IT, no questions asked. (I did that once in college for a friend who's cat got sick) Of course if a friend is in-between jobs or in a tight spot, I will treat them "please come hang out, dont worry about the money"- because that can get depressing. But THOUSANDS of dollars for a downpayment on a HOME?

If Carrie was sick or unemployed, I dont doubt the girls would offer her their spare room until she figured things out- no questions asked. But the entitlement Carrie had, and then Charlotte was guilted into selling her engagement ring so that Carrie could have the down payment. 

And yes Carrie, we were judging you- not for the bad money choices but for the assumption that economics dont apply to you. When I have been stupid and spent too much money at Sephora, I missed out on other things, that is life! If you cannot afford your apartment any more, you have to move, thats adulthood. You spent $40k on shoes and have no where to live, that doesnt make you a bad person, but you did it, and there are consequences. I think if Carrie had to move, that wouldve been a big lesson for her, but they wouldve had to build a new set.

[Ms Blue Jay]

41 minutes ago, Avabelle said:

That’s a completely reasonable statement but I’ll always defend Carrie when it comes to Nina Katz. Because I thought Nina Katz seemed like an asshole. 

Same, but I feel like I have a bias against that actor.  I'll have to see how I feel when I rewatch the episode.

Nina Katz was in business that wasn't hers, basically.  I have no problem with Aidan feeling however he wants to feel about Carrie, but Nina had zero to do with it.

Remember what Steve said?  And I can't believe I, resident Steve hater, am quoting his "wisdom" - Nobody knows what happened in our relationship except for the two of us.

Oh and didn't Nina also gossip about Carrie to Heather Graham?  Jesus Nina.  Get a life.

38 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

Another prime example of this- Carrie being upset that Charlotte didnt offer her THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS as a downpayment on her apartment. THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS.

If you ever want to feel catharsis on this subject you can always read where we discussed this for like 20 pages a while back 😄

Edited July 9, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[Scarlett45]

5 minutes ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Same, but I feel like I have a bias against that actor.  I'll have to see how I feel when I rewatch the episode.

Nina Katz was in business that wasn't hers, basically.  I have no problem with Aidan feeling however he wants to feel about Carrie, but Nina had zero to do with it.

Remember what Steve said?  And I can't believe I, resident Steve hater, am quoting his "wisdom" - Nobody knows what happened in our relationship except for the two of us.

Oh and didn't Nina also gossip about Carrie to Heather Graham?  Jesus Nina.  Get a life.

Yeah, but Nina didnt DO anything. She was introduced to Carrie by a mutual friend, and said "I dated Aidan after you." That wasnt being "in Carrie's business", that was having a reaction to new information. Nina was allowed to make a face, given that she was just introduced to a person whom she had a heard a LOT of negative things about. She did not ask Carrie what happened, or want her side of the story, she made a face. 

It was Carrie who hunted her down and made it a bigger deal that what it was. Nina was NOT thinking about her after that incident. She recognized the name and told Carrie they had a mutual person in common. Healther probably asked "did you know her?" and Nina gave the story regarding Aidan, and what she had heard. It was no different than Carrie discussing Big dating/marrying Natasha (before the affair) when she ran into them at that Hampton's party.

 

[Ms Blue Jay]

For me it was Nina's attitude.  She seemed judgemental.  She knew Aidan's side of the story and that's it.  And then she spread it around town, at that.  That's what I mean about being in business that isn't hers.

Quote

That face will be all over Vogue.

Not to mention SNL. Nina Katz loves to talk.

Quote

H - Hi, I'm Heather.
S - Heather Graham. I know. I love you. I'm Stanford Blatch.
N - Sorry. Heather, this is Carrie Bradshaw.
H - Carrie Bradshaw, really?  (Makes a face)

How could Heather Graham possibly know about Carrie's personal life if it wasn't for something that Nina did?  I'm sure it wasn't Aidan who told Heather!

Edited July 9, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[Ms Blue Jay]

35 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

It was no different than Carrie discussing Big dating/marrying Natasha (before the affair) when she ran into them at that Hampton's party.

Who did Carrie tell?  Do you mean her three closest friends?  Carrie was actually really tight-lipped about Big breaking her heart when it came to other people, i.e. the politician, the Yankee, the Jazz-man, Timothy Olyphant, Justin Theroux both times, Bon Jovi, etc.  She had to be coaxed to tell a therapist.  She deliberately didn't like to talk about it.  Meanwhile Nina told random celebrities that Carrie broke Aidan's heart.  Why would Heather even care?

Edited July 9, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[Ms Blue Jay]

37 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

Healther probably asked "did you know her?" and Nina gave the story regarding Aidan, and what she had heard. 

Heather already knew all about Carrie Bradshaw before ever meeting her.

[RealHousewife]

4 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

I agree. I did feel bad for Carrie here.

 

Regarding Charlotte leading a charmed life- she did, and some people just DO! Some people have loving families of origin, are comfortable financially, have good health, are not abused in adulthood, and just "don't get the the things they want sometimes". Also, it's human nature to compare yourself to people who are doing better than you than people are doing worse. 

Also, if your life has been pretty easy, little things DO stress you out- because you have different expectations. Had Charlotte not grown up the way she did, she wouldn't have been so stressed out about "dating since she was 15". That doesn't make Charlotte a bad human being, or unkind or something like that- but perspective is everything. 

True! Charlotte is someone I’d find a great friend. I can’t relate to her with everything, but I think she is a kind character. 

[Spartan Girl]

3 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Yeah, but Nina didnt DO anything. She was introduced to Carrie by a mutual friend, and said "I dated Aidan after you." That wasnt being "in Carrie's business", that was having a reaction to new information. Nina was allowed to make a face, given that she was just introduced to a person whom she had a heard a LOT of negative things about. She did not ask Carrie what happened, or want her side of the story, she made a face. 

It was Carrie who hunted her down and made it a bigger deal that what it was. Nina was NOT thinking about her after that incident. She recognized the name and told Carrie they had a mutual person in common. Healther probably asked "did you know her?" and Nina gave the story regarding Aidan, and what she had heard. It was no different than Carrie discussing Big dating/marrying Natasha (before the affair) when she ran into them at that Hampton's party.

 

Regardless of whether Nina was yapping about Carrie behind her back, I’ll always see Carrie as the bigger asshole because like you said, she fixated on it to the point of obsession when she could have just let it go. Not everyone is going to like you Carrie, that’s just the way it is.

Edited July 9, 2021 by Spartan Girl

[Scarlett45]

48 minutes ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Heather already knew all about Carrie Bradshaw before ever meeting her.

Oh I see. You remember the story better than I do. Yeah Nina was probably a gossipy person, but I don't think Carrie was any better.

[Hiyo]

And just like that...here we go! Scrape that barrel, hun.

Some Photos.

Edited July 9, 2021 by Hiyo

[libgirl2]

4 minutes ago, Hiyo said:

And just like that...here we go! Scrape that barrel, hun.

Some Photos.

I hate to say this but Kristin Davis has had bad work done from the look of the last picture in that article. 

[Ms Blue Jay]

That show has a forum on here:

https://forums.primetimer.com/forum/4849-and-just-like-that/

[chitowngirl]

That long, flat hair with the part down the middle does NOONE any favors. The part should be off the the side, even just a little bit. 

[VCRTracking]

 

 

[Ms Blue Jay]

Season 4......

Carrie pesters Aidan to take her back.  Finally he screams at her "YOU BROKE MY HEART!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Carrie runs away.  LOL.

Then Aidan gives in to Carrie and gets back together with her.  They don't really address anything........ Now I see how this could be a recipe for disaster!

Re:  The Bullshit Bagels scenario

Miranda hung up on Carrie.  Carrie had to work, I think, or to go to a meeting.  Being that Miranda hung up, she couldn't really explain.  I honestly think Carrie did pretty good in that crisis because Aidan was spectacular at helping Miranda.  And he's so strong!  I don't think Carrie was so bad here.

Edited July 13, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[T Summer]

11 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Season 4......

Carrie pesters Aidan to take her back.  Finally he screams at her "YOU BROKE MY HEART!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Carrie runs away.  LOL.

Then Aidan gives in to Carrie and gets back together with her.  They don't really address anything........ Now I see how this could be a recipe for disaster!

Given that, how unrealistic, unthinkable  and unimaginable was it for Aiden to beam at Carrie over muhammara in Abu Dhabi in that dreadful 2nd movie saying any of this B.S.?

"Man... that was my big mistake. Trying to get a rock on you.
You're not like other women. Man, are you not.
Fuck, you look good. You look hot. I'm sorry, but you do."

....before kissing her?

_______________________________________________________________________________

s6 e12 The One is on. It's the one where Big comes back to NYC for a diagnostic cardiac procedure  and when he closes his eyes in the hospital bed and tricks her into thinking he's out of it,  then opens his eyes and looks right at her...  Carrie of course screams!

...and she screams again when she sees a clown at Brady's birthday party!

Is this chick in the Guiness Book of World Records for most screams by a single actress  in a long running comedy or drama series? If not, she certainly should be.

[RealHousewife]

7 minutes ago, T Summer said:

 

 

Is this chick in the Guiness Book of World Records for most screams by a single actress  in a long running comedy or drama series? If not, she certainly should be.

lol! I act as a hobby and have done SATC stuff in acting class. I realized just how screechy Carrie was once I had to play her. 

[ifionlyknew]

4 hours ago, T Summer said:

Is this chick in the Guiness Book of World Records for most screams by a single actress  in a long running comedy or drama series? If not, she certainly should be.

I'm inclined to believe that was an acting choice SJP made and she either kept making that choice or the director decided to make that a thing.  Either way it ruins a lot of scenes for me.  

[Scarlett45]

21 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Miranda hung up on Carrie.  Carrie had to work, I think, or to go to a meeting.  Being that Miranda hung up, she couldn't really explain.  I honestly think Carrie did pretty good in that crisis because Aidan was spectacular at helping Miranda.  And he's so strong!  I don't think Carrie was so bad here.

As someone who hurt my back for the first time recently, and understood how awful it was, I think Miranda was in the wrong here. 
 

I get that she was in so much pain and helpless, but she did need help RIGHT THEN. Carrie sent someone she trusted to assist Miranda, who had the physical strength to lift her in her injury (and he did). Yes, I would be embarrassed if my friend’s boyfriend saw me naked- but this was a caregiving/medical thing. Aidan is a gentleman. 
 

Now that being said, Carrie should’ve brought the cream cheese with the bagels! Because Miranda was injured and needed a little TLC. 

[Hiyo]

Quote

Now that being said, Carrie should’ve brought the cream cheese with the bagels! Because Miranda was injured and needed a little TLC. 

And also, maybe wait longer than 20 seconds before pulling her patented "Enough about you, lets talk about my favorite subject, namely me" routine.

[Scarlett45]

Just now, Hiyo said:

And also, maybe wait longer than 20 seconds before pulling her patented "Enough about you, lets talk about my favorite subject, namely me" routine.

Yes- Carrie should’ve helped her friend get comfortable and situated, before she started in about Aidan.  

[Ms Blue Jay]

13 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

Yes- Carrie should’ve helped her friend get comfortable and situated, before she started in about Aidan.  

I actually watched the scene with bated breath because I was thinking that Carrie was going to do something horrible, but against my estimation, she asked Miranda how she was and was very caring.  Carrie asked what the next steps were for Miranda's recovery and listened.  THEN she started talking about Aidan.

For Carrie, this is all pretty good. So she forgot the cream cheese, whatever, she still brought something!  She's never exactly been the hostess with the mostest; she's not Charlotte.

Edited July 14, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[Ms Blue Jay]

And now I'm at the dreaded "Sex and the Country" episode where Carrie keeps screaming at squirrels.

I just saw the first scream and holy Moses.  She screams in utterly abandoned TERROR.  Like, full bodied full throated scream.  It's such an overreaction.  Poor Aidan thinks she's being attacked or something.  

Carrie drives a pick up truck to get herself a burger.  I'm surprised that she can drive.

It's nice that even though Miranda screamed at Steve after finding out he had cancer and they both acknowledged she was a jerk, Steve also thanked her because she kicked his ass and probably helped him a huge deal by finding the right doctor and insurance plan.

Big acts so pathetic over Willow Summers - which is fine, that's totally his right - but why does Carrie feel the need to help him through it?  They can be friends, but why be friends in this particular way?  It's not Carrie's fault that Big has no friends.  Which, he likely does, anyone remember Mr. Marvelous?  He needs to call someone who is NOT Carrie to moan about Willow.

Edited July 14, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[Scarlett45]

47 minutes ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Big acts so pathetic over Willow Summers - which is fine, that's totally his right - but why does Carrie feel the need to help him through it?  They can be friends, but why be friends in this particular way?  It's not Carrie's fault that Big has no friends.  Which, he likely does, anyone remember Mr. Marvelous?  He needs to call someone who is NOT Carrie to moan about Willow.

Carrie and Big were way too emotionally enmeshed for exes that didn’t have kids. 
 

They weren’t just ex’s that were in the same social circle- they were very emotionally intimate. I think Carrie would’ve used any opportunity to be close to Big no matter what she told herself. 

[RealHousewife]

1 hour ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Big acts so pathetic over Willow Summers - which is fine, that's totally his right - but why does Carrie feel the need to help him through it?  They can be friends, but why be friends in this particular way?  It's not Carrie's fault that Big has no friends.  Which, he likely does, anyone remember Mr. Marvelous?  He needs to call someone who is NOT Carrie to moan about Willow.

Right, talking the way he did about Willow to Carrie was so inappropriate. Save that for your buddies. 

"We talked, had a few... went up to her hotel... dress comes off... red panties. Kept her high heels on. I lifted her up, I put her on the bed…"

Seriously? Who talks like that to a female friend? And Carrie wasn't just any female friend, but an ex who never got over him. Gross. 

26 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

Carrie and Big were way too emotionally enmeshed for exes that didn’t have kids. 
 

They weren’t just ex’s that were in the same social circle- they were very emotionally intimate. I think Carrie would’ve used any opportunity to be close to Big no matter what she told herself. 

I know. Carrie insisting to Aiden that Big would always be part of her life was ridiculous. They had no children. They did not work together. There was no reason for them to have any contact, much less being close. Big and Carrie were both terrible respecting each other and other people they dated. 

It's possible for men and women to be friends, but there must be limits. Your ex should not be your best buddy. Do not discuss your sex life. Do not bring your ex to your current man's place. This is especially rotten if you cheated on your current partner with this ex. I don't find any of this to be unreasonable. Carrie really expected so much of Aiden. Aiden wasn't some super jealous guy. He didn't find a hello text from Big and flip out. Carrie basically cheated on him and threw it in his face. Both Big and Carrie lacked sensitivity toward the feelings of others.  

Edited July 14, 2021 by RealHousewife

[Ms Blue Jay]

32 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

They weren’t just ex’s that were in the same social circle- they were very emotionally intimate. I think Carrie would’ve used any opportunity to be close to Big no matter what she told herself. 

I think you're right.

10 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

Right, talking the way he did about Willow to Carrie was so inappropriate. Save that for your buddies. 

"We talked, had a few... went up to her hotel... dress comes off... red panties. Kept her high heels on. I lifted her up, I put her on the bed…"

Seriously? Who talks like that to a female friend? And Carrie wasn't just any female friend, but an ex who never got over him. Gross. 

LOL RIGHT???????  He was sooooo over the top!

10 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

Carrie really expected so much of Aiden. Aiden wasn't some super jealous guy. He didn't find a hello text from Big and flip out. Carrie basically cheated on him and threw it in his face. Both Big and Carrie lacked sensitivity toward the feelings of others.  

Right?  I mean, that's putting it mildly!  LOL!

[Black Knight]

4 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Carrie drives a pick up truck to get herself a burger.  I'm surprised that she can drive.

It was established in the baby shower episode in season 1 that Carrie can drive. She's the one who ends up driving the rental car out to Laney's house after all the women first pile into the passenger seats and realize nobody's taken the driver's seat.

[Ms Blue Jay]

19 minutes ago, Black Knight said:

It was established in the baby shower episode in season 1 that Carrie can drive. She's the one who ends up driving the rental car out to Laney's house after all the women first pile into the passenger seats and realize nobody's taken the driver's seat.

Yeah, I know that.  She also drives in LA, and stick, at that.  I'm still surprised that she can drive.  There's almost no opportunities to drive in NYC.  I live in a big city too and I lost my ability and nerve to drive years ago.  If someone randomly sat me in a pick up truck I'd call a cab.  

Edited July 15, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[Scarlett45]

1 hour ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Yeah, I know that.  She also drives in LA, and stick, at that.  I'm still surprised that she can drive.  There's almost no opportunities to drive in NYC.  I live in a big city too and I lost my ability and nerve to drive years ago.  If someone randomly sat me in a pick up truck I'd call a cab.  

Some people like driving more than others. I love driving. I didn’t drive for 4 months at a time my first year of college because I didn’t have a car there, but I couldn’t imagine losing my ability or nerve to drive unless I lost my eyesight or got injured in some way- it’s so therapeutic sometimes for me. 
 

So Carrie driving even though she didn’t need to on the regular didn’t surprise me. That would be me if I lived in NYC. I could see Carrie taking pride in being the one in her friend group that could drive a stick (she couldn’t drive it well, but she managed). 

[qtpye]

5 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

Right, talking the way he did about Willow to Carrie was so inappropriate. Save that for your buddies. 

"We talked, had a few... went up to her hotel... dress comes off... red panties. Kept her high heels on. I lifted her up, I put her on the bed…"

Seriously? Who talks like that to a female friend? And Carrie wasn't just any female friend, but an ex who never got over him. Gross. 

I know. Carrie insisting to Aiden that Big would always be part of her life was ridiculous. They had no children. They did not work together. There was no reason for them to have any contact, much less being close. Big and Carrie were both terrible respecting each other and other people they dated. 

It's possible for men and women to be friends, but there must be limits. Your ex should not be your best buddy. Do not discuss your sex life. Do not bring your ex to your current man's place. This is especially rotten if you cheated on your current partner with this ex. I don't find any of this to be unreasonable. Carrie really expected so much of Aiden. Aiden wasn't some super jealous guy. He didn't find a hello text from Big and flip out. Carrie basically cheated on him and threw it in his face. Both Big and Carrie lacked sensitivity toward the feelings of others.  

I feel like Big was friend-zoning Carrie and Carrie was always secretly hoping for something more...so she stayed in the friendzone.

I know people always talk about men getting friend-zoned but I think it is actually worse for women because most women actually do not mind being friends.

I knew a girl who has liked this guy from when we were young. They never had a relationship but she has always taken the title of his "best friend" in hopes that it could lead to something romantic.

He has grown up and married someone else. She actually sometimes babysits his kids and is still 'hoping' when she could have easily moved on to someone else years ago.

[Avabelle]

8 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

I'm still surprised that she can drive

I’m not - I never watched Carrie Diaries S don’t take the background there as cannon but I always imagined she had a relatively normal upbringing with her mother outside New York where she learned to drive etc. I never feel like she grew up privileged like Charlotte or super driven like I imagine Miranda was. I feel like her and Samantha had similar modest upbringings.

[Ms Blue Jay]

2 hours ago, Avabelle said:

I’m not - I never watched Carrie Diaries S don’t take the background there as cannon but I always imagined she had a relatively normal upbringing with her mother outside New York where she learned to drive etc. I never feel like she grew up privileged like Charlotte or super driven like I imagine Miranda was. I feel like her and Samantha had similar modest upbringings.

Being out of practice when it comes to driving can be a mark of less privilege, not necessarily more.  In my city parking spots are extremely expensive.  It's also expensive to own a car what with the cost, payments, gas.  That's why a lot of people don't bother and just take public transit instead.  So a lot of people in the city spend decades without a car.

[ifionlyknew]

15 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

I think Carrie would’ve used any opportunity to be close to Big no matter what she told herself. 

This is true.  No matter she was back with Aidan.  No matter her being "friends" with Big was disrespectful to Big.  It was what Carrie wanted.  She had a hard time quitting Big the same way she had trouble quitting cigarettes.

9 hours ago, qtpye said:

I feel like Big was friend-zoning Carrie and Carrie was always secretly hoping for something more...so she stayed in the friendzone.

I think after she broke it off with him at the end of season one because he wouldn't say she is the one Carrie decided she would just wait him out till he did say she is the one.  I think no matter who she was with in her mind she always thought her and Big would end up together.

2 hours ago, Avabelle said:

I never watched Carrie Diaries S don’t take the background there as cannon but I always imagined she had a relatively normal upbringing with her mother outside New York where she learned to drive etc. I never feel like she grew up privileged like Charlotte or super driven like I imagine Miranda was. I feel like her and Samantha had similar modest upbringings.

I never watched the Carrie Diaries but I read the book. Carrie was raised by her father. I think her mother died. She had a younger sister.  And I think her father was a professor maybe. Of course in the show Carrie's father left her and her mother and there was never a mention of a sister.

 

[Scarlett45]

13 hours ago, qtpye said:

I know people always talk about men getting friend-zoned but I think it is actually worse for women because most women actually do not mind being friends.

I knew a girl who has liked this guy from when we were young. They never had a relationship but she has always taken the title of his "best friend" in hopes that it could lead to something romantic.

He has grown up and married someone else. She actually sometimes babysits his kids and is still 'hoping' when she could have easily moved on to someone else years ago.

Women get friend-zoned as well. There are men that will use a woman for her emotional labor (and sometimes sexual activity), KNOWING she is into him but having no intention of giving her what she wants. The "comfort girl"- all of the emotional and sometimes sexual benefits of having a relationship but none of the work. I have a few friends that went through that in their 20s (they had low self esteem, often related to their appearance) but they grew out of it. I think women are more in the danger of being friend-zoned because women tend to be more emotionally giving. Carrie was certainly Big's "comfort" girl, but they did have a relationship at one point- I still contend Carrie was too old to be that stupid. The first breakup, okay, but after that- she didn't just didn't want to see the writing on the wall. 

3 hours ago, ifionlyknew said:

I think after she broke it off with him at the end of season one because he wouldn't say she is the one Carrie decided she would just wait him out till he did say she is the one.  I think no matter who she was with in her mind she always thought her and Big would end up together.

I had not seen it that way but you are brilliant. YES I think that was the issue. she was going to 'wait him out', and have sex/ fun with other people along the way.

3 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Being out of practice when it comes to driving can be a mark of less privilege, not necessarily more.  In my city parking spots are extremely expensive.  It's also expensive to own a car what with the cost, payments, gas.  That's why a lot of people don't bother and just take public transit instead.  So a lot of people in the city spend decades without a car.

Yeah- so many of my sister's caregivers have not owned cars/don't drive (I live in Chicago, the actual city proper). If you have another method of transportation, car ownership is not always the most economical choice. There's a difference between having a driver (like Big did) and taking public transit because you have to get to work and that is the most affordable way to get there.

[ifionlyknew]

4 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

I still contend Carrie was too old to be that stupid.

I was that stupid.  LOL. And I was older than what Carrie was.  You can convince yourself of a lot of things when you want it to be true.

5 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

There's a difference between having a driver (like Big did) and taking public transit because you have to get to work and that is the most affordable way to get there.

You know we didn't see the four women maneuver around the city all that much. A couple times in cabs.  Never the subway.  Carrie once considered riding a bus.  We did see them walk a lot.

[Scarlett45]

29 minutes ago, ifionlyknew said:

You know we didn't see the four women maneuver around the city all that much. A couple times in cabs.  Never the subway.  Carrie once considered riding a bus.  We did see them walk a lot.

We saw them get in cabs a lot but transpiration isn't exactly "tv friendly"- not much is happening to get from point A to point B so it makes sense that we saw it. 

30 minutes ago, ifionlyknew said:

I was that stupid.  LOL. And I was older than what Carrie was.  You can convince yourself of a lot of things when you want it to be true.

I am sure you are a brilliant person who made a mistake- Carrie had this PATTERN of making the same mistake over and over again. My grandfather used to say "you are entitled to one mistake of every kind, after that, It wasn't a mistake it was a choice".

 

With Carrie I just wish she would've OWNED her choices. Everything was always someone else's fault. First Big's fault for leading her on, Aidan's fault for not understanding what Big meant to her. Up through season 2, I did get Carrie, she wanted to believe that Big cared about her as much as she cared about him. "He was the one with the whip, but I was the one that tied myself up."- after that she never just owned "yes I am tying myself up and that is my choice, and if I suffer I did this to myself." Carrie lacked the same emotional maturity she always accused Big of lacking. 

 

Maybe they were right for each other after all.

[ifionlyknew]

3 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

I am sure you are a brilliant person who made a mistake- Carrie had this PATTERN of making the same mistake over and over again.

Thank you.

When Carrie broke things off with  Big at the end of season one I thought she was overreacting.  She wanted something more and he wasn't willing to give that to her. Which was his right.  But she made the choice to say no I want more and if you can't do that I'm not playing this game anymore.  But then she did end up playing the game again.  She even hid it from her friends.    When she had the affair with him I understood it.  I thought she was wrong for doing it but I understood it.    Big had hurt her badly and here he was wanting her again. That can fuck with your emotions.  However once that blew up and Natasha and Aidan both got hurt her and Big should have realized they were toxic together.  And something I just realized. We saw Carrie feel badly about hurting Aidan but we never saw Big even show an ounce of regret for hurting Natasha. All he seemed concerned about was how much it was going to cost  him.  As much as I love Chris Noth as I have gotten older and upon multiple re watches I like Big less and less.  

[Scarlett45]

11 minutes ago, ifionlyknew said:

We saw Carrie feel badly about hurting Aidan but we never saw Big even show an ounce of regret for hurting Natasha. All he seemed concerned about was how much it was going to cost  him.  As much as I love Chris Noth as I have gotten older and upon multiple re watches I like Big less and less.  

Big was a jerk, and he had a history of cheating on wives. Big was very selfish, he really had no business being married. He cheated on his first wife and she left him (which she had every right to do, and he seemed to understand that); he cheated on Natasha, and I think that that point he was just emotionally done with her and didn't care about her feelings. This man brought his side chick, into his marital home, to have sex in his wife's bed, and eat her food. NO MAN (or person) with a tiny bit of respect for their partner, would do that- even if they did want to cheat/have sex with another person or something. You dont violate their home like that.

 

He didn't leave because again- it would've cost him, not that he actually wanted to be married to Natasha while having Carrie (or someone else) on the side.

I dont know why after all that Carrie even wanted him. I think Big only ended up with Carrie because he was getting older and tired, mortality was staring him in the face and he was lonely. He was familiar with her, and knew she wouldnt ask him to deal with babies or elder care, thus he was willing to be with her.

[ifionlyknew]

6 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

I dont know why after all that Carrie even wanted him. I think Big only ended up with Carrie because he was getting older and tired, mortality was staring him in the face and he was lonely. He was familiar with her, and knew she wouldnt ask him to deal with babies or elder care, thus he was willing to be with her.

All of this is true.  But the writers thought that was the happily ever after ending.  A lot of fans clamored for it. Myself included.  I absolutely loved the scene when Miranda told Big go get our girl.  I am not a fan of Carrie but I now think she would have been better off coming back from Paris and starting fresh.  And then the first movie could have been about Carrie finding a new love.  

[andromeda331]

26 minutes ago, ifionlyknew said:

All of this is true.  But the writers thought that was the happily ever after ending.  A lot of fans clamored for it. Myself included.  I absolutely loved the scene when Miranda told Big go get our girl.  I am not a fan of Carrie but I now think she would have been better off coming back from Paris and starting fresh.  And then the first movie could have been about Carrie finding a new love.  

I wish they had done that instead. Carrie and Big were toxic and shouldn't end up together. I wanted Carrie to come back to New York on her own when she realized Paris wasn't working out instead of being "rescued". 

[Hiyo]

Quote

Carrie and Big were toxic and shouldn't end up together.

Hey, the single people of NYC (and probably the entire Tri-State area) all dodged a huge bullet once Carrie and Big got together for good.

[Scarlett45]

1 hour ago, ifionlyknew said:

All of this is true.  But the writers thought that was the happily ever after ending.  A lot of fans clamored for it. Myself included.  I absolutely loved the scene when Miranda told Big go get our girl.  I am not a fan of Carrie but I now think she would have been better off coming back from Paris and starting fresh.  And then the first movie could have been about Carrie finding a new love.  

 

50 minutes ago, andromeda331 said:

I wish they had done that instead. Carrie and Big were toxic and shouldn't end up together. I wanted Carrie to come back to New York on her own when she realized Paris wasn't working out instead of being "rescued". 

I agree with this. I think Carrie should've come back from Paris on her own terms, renewed to start a new life. 

I have to say the writers for the 1st movie were at least consistent. Big and his decision to leave Carrie at the altar and embarrass her because he was "freaking out" about the bride and groom thing (ummmm he is the one that suggested they get married) was consistent with his character through seasons 1-6. He was a non entity in the second movie for the most part.

[ifionlyknew]

6 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

He was a non entity in the second movie for the most part.

Which begs the question, what is his role in the new show? Are they still married? If so are they happily married?  If so why is Aidan part of the new show?

One of things I enjoyed about the original show was the women finding their way through life and it didn't always involve a man.  I did enjoy Charlotte realizing her happily ever after didn't have to be picture perfect.  I also enjoyed Samantha realizing it was OK to like a guy.  But the strongest stories were the ones about the women's friendship.  I hope the new show focuses on that and not just standard couple issues.  

[Scarlett45]

35 minutes ago, ifionlyknew said:

Which begs the question, what is his role in the new show? Are they still married? If so are they happily married?  If so why is Aidan part of the new show?

One of things I enjoyed about the original show was the women finding their way through life and it didn't always involve a man.  I did enjoy Charlotte realizing her happily ever after didn't have to be picture perfect.  I also enjoyed Samantha realizing it was OK to like a guy.  But the strongest stories were the ones about the women's friendship.  I hope the new show focuses on that and not just standard couple issues.  

Taking my reply to the "And Just Like That" anticipation thread.

[qtpye]

7 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Women get friend-zoned as well. There are men that will use a woman for her emotional labor (and sometimes sexual activity), KNOWING she is into him but having no intention of giving her what she wants. The "comfort girl"- all of the emotional and sometimes sexual benefits of having a relationship but none of the work. I have a few friends that went through that in their 20s (they had low self esteem, often related to their appearance) but they grew out of it. I think women are more in the danger of being friend-zoned because women tend to be more emotionally giving. Carrie was certainly Big's "comfort" girl, but they did have a relationship at one point- I still contend Carrie was too old to be that stupid. The first breakup, okay, but after that- she didn't just didn't want to see the writing on the wall. 

I had not seen it that way but you are brilliant. YES I think that was the issue. she was going to 'wait him out', and have sex/ fun with other people along the way.

Yeah- so many of my sister's caregivers have not owned cars/don't drive (I live in Chicago, the actual city proper). If you have another method of transportation, car ownership is not always the most economical choice. There's a difference between having a driver (like Big did) and taking public transit because you have to get to work and that is the most affordable way to get there.

I wish that the bolded part could be shouted from the rooftops because I have seen so many of my friends get hurt by being the "comfort girls" because women do tend to be more emotionally giving.

Most men eventually do not want to be a friend to a woman they are romantically or sexually attracted to and eventually move on. However, I have seen women hold on for years while these guys use them.

Also, it has been my experience that, unlike Big and Carrie, most "comfort girls" do not end up getting the guy (not that these types of guys are any type of prize or reward).

[Scarlett45]

1 hour ago, qtpye said:

I wish that the bolded part could be shouted from the rooftops because I have seen so many of my friends get hurt by being the "comfort girls" because women do tend to be more emotionally giving.

Most men eventually do not want to be a friend to a woman they are romantically or sexually attracted to and eventually move on. However, I have seen women hold on for years while these guys use them.

Also, it has been my experience that, unlike Big and Carrie, most "comfort girls" do not end up getting the guy (not that these types of guys are any type of prize or reward).

(Bolding mine) YES! I have seen it too. YEARS. 
 

You’re right, most of the time Carrie wouldn’t have ended up with Big, he would’ve kept stringing her along and using her. I also think if Natasha had not been the type to end the marriage (for whatever reason), Big would’ve stayed married to Natasha. No doubt about it. Big only wanted Carrie when there was no one else and he was just too tired to “hunt” any more. His health had scared him and he realized he didn’t have anyone he could call. 
 

That’s another reason I don’t like that they ended up together. Miranda & Steve ending up together was more realistic- they dated, had issues, broke up; but stayed “friendly”. After hooking up, conceiving a child and coparenting together they realized “hey this is something deeper, let’s make a life together.” Charlotte and Harry was realistic- no Harry wasn’t the “type” Charlotte wanted but he was successful and the sex was amazing. I love the scene where they have sex for the first time and he goes (paraphrasing) “you are so sexy” and she says “stop I’m wearing my glasses”- it’s so damn funny!!!!!!
 

[ifionlyknew]

I wasn't an Aidan fan but at least him and Carrie had a real relationship.  What Carrie had with Big was at best dating and at worst hooking up.  The more and more I think about it I wonder how many viewers thought maybe if I just hang in there the guy who's been stringing me along will finally tell me I'm the one.

[Scarlett45]

19 minutes ago, ifionlyknew said:

I wasn't an Aidan fan but at least him and Carrie had a real relationship.  What Carrie had with Big was at best dating and at worst hooking up.  The more and more I think about it I wonder how many viewers thought maybe if I just hang in there the guy who's been stringing me along will finally tell me I'm the one.

I think Aidan was a good man, but all wrong for Carrie. And I think Carrie wasn’t a total fool, she knew Aidan was a great guy and she wanted to be loved by someone like that. 
 

I think Carrie and Big had a relationship- not a very deep one, and Carrie was much more heavily invested in it than he was. But he did consider Carrie his girlfriend the second time around.