S01.E03: B-O-N–BONFIRE

[Drogo]

While JJ finds success at school with a group of friends, Maya forces the cancellation of the homecoming bonfire, concerned that the beach location is not wheelchair accessible. Soon, the students speak out against JJ. But when Maya realizes she was wrong, the two stage a fake prank to encourage his classmates to have a change of heart.

Meanwhile, Jimmy helps Ray settle into the new home.

[Crs97]

This show makes me so happy!  Dylan's subplot was the highlight, though I love the Jimmy/Ray bond.  Actually, it was all good.

"I don't know who JJ is, but I'm sorry!"  Best line.

[kat165]

I like this one too. I only watched the first ep because I was bored and sort of curious. But it's the younger son who has kept me watching. Last wk as soon as he mentioned planetarium I knew I'd watch this again. I'm really enjoying the relationship between him and Kripke, too, Crs. I'm even enjoying Minnie Driver surprisingly who I didn't like before.

[Tiger]

This was definitely the strongest episode yet, and I think I could really love this show if it wasnt for the feckless loser dad.  And then excusing his feckless losery because he has a special needs child?!?  Bitch needs to sit down and get a damn job.  

That aside, the scene where the principle from Trophy Wife was soliciting feedback from the students at the faux bonfire had been howling, especially Cedric's reaction to the comments. 

Edited October 6, 2016 by Tiger

[possibilities]

Wow, I hated it. HAAAATED.

It's not like they had to choose between a pathetic BS non-bonfire in the gym and an extremely inaccessible bonfire at some ridiculous place way out of reach. All they needed was to move it to another outdoor venue, maybe a beach or if there's no beach then put it in some other navigable space. Between the darkness and maybe some nearby woods, there'd be plenty of shadows to sneak away and behave illicitly. It's not like teenagers don't drink and have sex and generally engage in debauchery unless they have to scale some outrageous craggy peak.

Manufacturing a false choice in order to imply that you either have to be inclusive OR have fun is utter bullshit.

There may well be times when trade offs and compromises need to be made (I personally would not make it at ANY bonfire because of the smoke destroying my breathing), but the way they set this up, it seemed like it was designed to reinforce the idea that including us is a bummer.

Also, the solution to fake the bullying of JJ was horrible. First of all, they've framed the other team for a serious crime, and then brutalized them for revenge. Just what we need more of in the world! Second, JJ is treated as a mascot, not a friend.

I really thought someone was going to suggest winning people back by throwing a fabulous accessible party, not by staging a hate crime and then brutally punishing people who had nothing to do with it.

[bros402]

I enjoyed the episode. Sure, the alternative bonfire and the staged prank were outrageous - but it was perfectly within suspension of disbelief. I'd say it was the strongest episode so far - they are fleshing out the characters at the right rate, it is nice to learn about the other characters. Though both of the sibling's subplots so far focusing on walking/movement in the two non-pilot episodes is a bit... odd and on-the-nose. Hopefully they have that out of their system. The new AAC board was entertaining, though I hope it is only for this episode.

I like how we learned a bit about JJ before his current school - it sounds like before this, he was in an out of district placement in a multiply disabled school, based on the disabilities that Maya was rattling off.

I'm guessing some people will have issue with the father saying that JJ being the way he is is an excuse and makes him bulletproof, but it is a sitcom - it's the third episode, he'll be fleshed out more.

Edited October 6, 2016 by bros402

[alexvillage]

5 hours ago, possibilities said:

Wow, I hated it. HAAAATED.

It's not like they had to choose between a pathetic BS non-bonfire in the gym and an extremely inaccessible bonfire at some ridiculous place way out of reach. All they needed was to move it to another outdoor venue, maybe a beach or if there's no beach then put it in some other navigable space. Between the darkness and maybe some nearby woods, there'd be plenty of shadows to sneak away and behave illicitly. It's not like teenagers don't drink and have sex and generally engage in debauchery unless they have to scale some outrageous craggy peak.

Manufacturing a false choice in order to imply that you either have to be inclusive OR have fun is utter bullshit.

There may well be times when trade offs and compromises need to be made (I personally would not make it at ANY bonfire because of the smoke destroying my breathing), but the way they set this up, it seemed like it was designed to reinforce the idea that including us is a bummer.

Also, the solution to fake the bullying of JJ was horrible. First of all, they've framed the other team for a serious crime, and then brutalized them for revenge. Just what we need more of in the world! Second, JJ is treated as a mascot, not a friend.

I really thought someone was going to suggest winning people back by throwing a fabulous accessible party, not by staging a hate crime and then brutally punishing people who had nothing to do with it.

Yes to all of this. 

It is the usual non disabled person is the savior and protector. In this case she is also the one who messed up by not allowing JJ, who is 16, to have self-determination and learn how to self-advocate. It was pity-porn.

The plot, the way I read it, is: Super mom undermines disabled teen, gets a school event cancelled, then saves teen from scorn by creating a fake situation. Event is still inaccessible. Teen is still talked over.

Also, a translator is supposed to do exactly that, translate. Not talk over, for, or instead of. Actually, when on the job, a translator does not talk at all, unless the person they are translating for asks them to. Kenneth talks too much and puts himself in the middle of JJ's business.

Missed JJ's voice in the episode

[Mama No Life]

The JJ stuff is fine, but I really enjoy the younger son and his lines are the best.  I also found the subplot with the aide accidentally ruining running for teen girl.  The whole scene with the coach and the runners made me laugh.

[Big Mother]

UGH. Did not like the family stuff. There's no excuse for them not to pack or unpack like normal human beings. "This family has challenges other families don't." Yeah, but that does not mean you should live like slobs.

The sister's running storyline was pointless.

Kenneth is the only voice of reason here - sticking up for JJ at school and at home. I like him.

I can't stand Maya. But I'll take that over to the Parents thread....

[Silver Raven]

I loved all of the class being politically correct in discussing how to react to JJ's mother causing the bonfire to be canceled.

[Ikki]

My favorite line was from Dylan, at the end: "Does everyone who plays a sport do it for JJ?"

[Empress1]

5 hours ago, Big Mother said:

UGH. Did not like the family stuff. There's no excuse for them not to pack or unpack like normal human beings. "This family has challenges other families don't." Yeah, but that does not mean you should live like slobs.

And can someone tell me why neither of the parents has a job? How are they paying for the house? I know it's shitty, but that doesn't mean it's free! I think the father is funny (there was a head shake he did that cracked me up) so I think he'd be a funny kind of Jim Halpert presence at a workplace.

Not to mention that it makes zero sense for the family to keep the house in a state that makes it hard for JJ to navigate. Pick your shit up off the floor!

[kathyk24]

21 hours ago, bros402 said:

I enjoyed the episode. Sure, the alternative bonfire and the staged prank were outrageous - but it was perfectly within suspension of disbelief. I'd say it was the strongest episode so far - they are fleshing out the characters at the right rate, it is nice to learn about the other characters. Though both of the sibling's subplots so far focusing on walking/movement in the two non-pilot episodes is a bit... odd and on-the-nose. Hopefully they have that out of their system. The new AAC board was entertaining, though I hope it is only for this episode.

I like how we learned a bit about JJ before his current school - it sounds like before this, he was in an out of district placement in a multiply disabled school, based on the disabilities that Maya was rattling off.

I'm guessing some people will have issue with the father saying that JJ being the way he is is an excuse and makes him bulletproof, but it is a sitcom - it's the third episode, he'll be fleshed out more.

I thought this episode did a good job of sending up the families of disabled children are special too. Often families are seen as better because they have a special needs child. JJ's disability is no excuse for the family to be slobs. I loved Dylan's line about running because she liked it not due to her brother. Is JJ the first disabled student at that school? I can't believe that the issue of the bonfire hasn't been addressed yet. I like Maya I think she truly loves her son but she's overprotective. The kind of help JJ needs at 16 is different from the help he needed when he was six.

[bros402]

2 hours ago, kathyk24 said:

I thought this episode did a good job of sending up the families of disabled children are special too. Often families are seen as better because they have a special needs child. JJ's disability is no excuse for the family to be slobs. I loved Dylan's line about running because she liked it not due to her brother. Is JJ the first disabled student at that school? I can't believe that the issue of the bonfire hasn't been addressed yet. I like Maya I think she truly loves her son but she's overprotective. The kind of help JJ needs at 16 is different from the help he needed when he was six.

JJ is the first disabled student at that school, judging by everything seen so far.

[kassygreene]

When Jimmy (& Ray) say bulletproof, substitute bullshit-proof to get the true feel.  Doctors and other specialists do their thing; when it works they take the credit, when it fails they refer you on.  

My brother was diagnosed (autism) in the 60s.  My parents ignored all of the traditional medical treatments (which were a. put him in an institution and b. forget he existed), found an experimental treatment (behavior modification), and we moved twice for this, plus my mother got a degree in Special Ed, and my brother has never been in an institution nor forgotten.  To get to today, my entire family had to be bullshit-proof.

Since American broadcast networks are not bullshit-proof, bulletproof is the word that got used.

[Bobcatkitten]

I admit I laugh a fair amount watching this. But these people are just awful. 

They don't care about their home, which is like a trash heap. Their children are rude. Am I supposed to like them?

[dmmetler]

I can't imagine parents would be OK with the bonfire as initially described as a school-sponsored activity. I could see it as an unofficial annual event that the school turns a blind eye to until Mama Bear Maya forces them to call attention to, but the liability of that being an official school event...just...no. 

[OnceSane]

Dylan and her track team (coach included) were the best part of the episode.  I also liked the students discussing whether they should express their anger/disappointment at JJ in order to treat him the same way they would anyone else.

[tennisgurl]

Dylan and the track team were my favorite part. Her spreading her existential gloom everywhere was pretty much where I think this show wants to be. Funny with a weirdly dark twist. 

I do hope they dont continue with the whole "we have a special needs child so we can be lazy assholes" thing for too long. I would like to see some growth from them. Its one thing to not care what people think, its another to be selfish and to live in a slob hole. I hope that we are getting closer to some self growth. And why dont the parents have jobs? Are they living off someones rich dead relative or something? 

I am torn on the bonfire/prank to get everyone back on JJs side thing. I mean, its kind of funny in a sitcom way, but its also all really stupid. How easy would it be to just make a bonfire thats more easily accessible? And wouldn't it be better for everyone if JJs family hosted a super cool party? It might have even been funnier, if they had played it right. 

The students all deciding that being mad at JJ was the only way to respect JJ was quite funny, although they should really have been mad at JJs mom. 

[Maharincess]

10 hours ago, scribe95 said:

I admit I laugh a fair amount watching this. But these people are just awful. 

They don't care about their home, which is like a trash heap. Their children are rude. Am I supposed to like them?

I may not like having them as neighbors but as a sitcom family I friggin love them.  If they were a normal family doing normal things it wouldn't be funny, it would be real life.  I would much rather watch a crazy, messy, loud, dysfunctional family than a quiet, "normal" family who are just quietly living life. 

I've noticed that The Middle and this show seem to get nitpicked for not being realistic more than any other show. 

I liked this episode. I love the scenes with Dylan and the dad, (I can't remember his name) It seems like they're trying to make each other better people and I like them together. 

Edit: @scribe95, I wasn't referring to you in this comment.  I was speaking in general terms. Sorry if there was a misunderstanding. 

Edited October 8, 2016 by Maharincess

[neuromom]

On 10/7/2016 at 7:23 PM, Maharincess said:

I may not like having them as neighbors but as a sitcom family I friggin love them.  If they were a normal family doing normal things it wouldn't be funny, it would be real life.  I would much rather watch a crazy, messy, loud, dysfunctional family than a quiet, "normal" family who are just quietly living life. 

I've noticed that The Middle and this show seem to get nitpicked for not being realistic more than any other show. 

I liked this episode. I love the scenes with Dylan and the dad, (I can't remember his name) It seems like they're trying to make each other better people and I like them together. 

Edit: @scribe95, I wasn't referring to you in this comment.  I was speaking in general terms. Sorry if there was a misunderstanding. 

You nailed it! They are a SITCOM family. I know there have been some complaints with some of the ridiculous and OTT moments in the show. For me, it did bother me that she tested the EMS system with a fake call for service. Borderline illegal , and lots of liability if those ambulances crashed while responding to the fake call. 

But, I've had to realize that this is NOT a documentary, or a drama, or a movie of the week. It's a sitcoms. Which means it's OTT, sometimes ridiculous, sometimes unrealistic. But it's FUNNY ..which is the job of a sitcom. And there plenty of real moments in there.

ON 10/6/2016 AT 0:47 PM, BIG MOTHER SAID:

 

[Gulftastic]

Writing 'rubbish' on the fake banner over the tied-up JJ was a bit of a giveaway, wasn't it? AFAIK, it's not a word Americans use in that context, is it?

I liked Minny Driver saying 'American Football'.

Edited October 9, 2016 by Gulftastic

[Crs97]

"Rubbish" should have tipped them off, but we are talking about a group of guys who didn't know why there was a key lying in front of JJ. I think she was safe!  Actually, I had hoped that Kenneth and she would've shared a wink because he figured it out.

[Seelouis]

I hope very soon they address how it must affect JJ to constantly be the cause of "we can't have nice things...we are jerks...we don't get to....because of JJ". I don't think they can keep this "it's all because of JJ" excuse going without showing that it's unfair to all of the kids, including JJ.  

[Bobcatkitten]

My suspension of disbelief only goes so far. I mean the parents have no jobs. How are they paying for physical therapy and clothes and food?

[Big Mother]

I think one of them is probably working but we don't see it / they don't talk about it.

[neuromom]

Actually, I imagine that Maya is probably designated JJ's IHSS provider. I work "full time" as my son's provider. In fact, I'm not allowed to have any other full time jobs, though I'm allowed to work a little part time side job while he is in school. And my career paid a good salary, so I took a pay cut, but I'm the best (and really only one ) that can really do best by my son. His needs are more complex than even JJ's.

[Mama No Life]

A lot of people clearly don't understand the financial stress of disabled children.  If mom and dad were working, JJ wouldn't qualify for state and federal programs for medicaid, so they would have to pay for most of his therapies, medicines, etc out of pocket or, if they are lucky, they pay for what's left over after insurance covers its tiny bit.  However, if they have little income, medicaid will not only pay for all of it, but he can get SSI disability.   Absurdly, many families are better off financially and emotionally with no source of employment income.  Parents are essentially punished for trying to pay their share. Ain't America great?

Again, I know it's a sitcom and for all we know both of them have jobs that haven't been shown.  But in reality, it looks a lot like this sitcom.....

[bros402]

12 hours ago, Mama No Life said:

A lot of people clearly don't understand the financial stress of disabled children.  If mom and dad were working, JJ wouldn't qualify for state and federal programs for medicaid, so they would have to pay for most of his therapies, medicines, etc out of pocket or, if they are lucky, they pay for what's left over after insurance covers its tiny bit.  However, if they have little income, medicaid will not only pay for all of it, but he can get SSI disability.   Absurdly, many families are better off financially and emotionally with no source of employment income.  Parents are essentially punished for trying to pay their share. Ain't America great?

Again, I know it's a sitcom and for all we know both of them have jobs that haven't been shown.  But in reality, it looks a lot like this sitcom.....

SSI and Disability are different. They *did* pay the OT out of pocket in the second episode - well, they had to pay a cancellation fee.

Since it is a family of 5 - two ineligible children, the parents have to earn less than $4,525 a month for a disabled child to qualify for SSI - https://www.ssa.gov/ssi/text-child-ussi.htm

[Mama No Life]

Yes, what would I know?  As a single mother of two, making a teacher salary, my autistic son was not able to qualify for any benefits until he was 18 and showed no income of his own.    4525 for two parents isn't much, you know?  Roughtly 54K for a family of 5.  And then not even that when you're paying for meds/therapies/etc. Which was my point.  Why kill yourself for two small paying jobs when you have to constantly ask off for dr appts, therapy, etc when you're just as well off not working?  I've known lots of people give up the stress of working so they can take care of their special needs kids. They give up vacations, new clothes and furniture....again, sounds pretty much like this show.

 

And SSI is supplemental income for the disabled.  No, It's not the same as SS disability but I think it's clear to all of us that JJ didn't get hurt on the job.

I could do this all day......

[possibilities]

There's also the issue of medical expenses. My friend with CP-- her wheelchair cost $25,000 and needed to be replaced from time to time (every few years). Her husband's medical insurance through his job did not always cover it, so they had to pay for the chair out of pocket. He had a middle class job, so they did not qualify for medicaid or other government help, so besides having to pay for the chair out of pocket, they also had to pay for her attendant help (feeding, toileting, dressing, transfers, hygiene, etc). Her husband did as much of her care as he could, but they still needed several hours a day of help while he was at work, and then when he injured his back they needed full time help. They were in extreme financial duress but he liked his job and didn't want to stop working. At the time of her death, they were on the verge of bankruptcy and I still think the stress is what killed her.

[neuromom]

4 hours ago, Mama No Life said:

Yes, what would I know?  As a single mother of two, making a teacher salary, my autistic son was not able to qualify for any benefits until he was 18 and showed no income of his own.    4525 for two parents isn't much, you know?  Roughtly 54K for a family of 5.  And then not even that when you're paying for meds/therapies/etc. Which was my point.  Why kill yourself for two small paying jobs when you have to constantly ask off for dr appts, therapy, etc when you're just as well off not working?  I've known lots of people give up the stress of working so they can take care of their special needs kids. They give up vacations, new clothes and furniture....again, sounds pretty much like this show.

 

And SSI is supplemental income for the disabled.  No, It's not the same as SS disability but I think it's clear to all of us that JJ didn't get hurt on the job.

I could do this all day......

Taking this over to the "Real families real IEPs " thread..

[Mama No Life]

Ooops, sorry....should have done that myself! My apologies....

[GRChereck]

I thought the pilot episode had a couple of sweet Jimmy moments (his talk with Ray in the car, his advice to Maya when she barged in on his shower -- "You fight and fight to make sure JJ has a normal life... Maybe he's not the only one who deserves that."), and the second ep did an admirable job of at least attempting to flesh out his character a bit, but "Bonfire" is the one where I totally fell in love with him.

At first I had to wonder whether his trash-collecting was maybe a coping mechanism (due to the family's money struggles, or possibly rooted in some childhood trauma), or just a quirk the writers gave him as they were still trying to figure out his personality early on; but the show apparently dropped that thread after this ep. Indeed, I was impressed how quickly it took him to clean up the house and throw out most of the crap* after realizing Ray's embarrassment over not being able to bring friends over (though I suppose when he inadvertently took that college girl's stuff, he couldn't resist because it was so much nicer than his usual findings on people's curbs).

And of course, his "bulletproof" speech finally sealed the deal; the writing (and John's performance) really made me feel the impact that JJ's CP diagnosis at birth must have had on Jimmy, as well as his vulnerability in opening up to Ray about it. His chill-dude, who-cares-what-others-think? attitude began to have real, serious weight behind it (making him more than just another lazy bumbling-dad sitcom cliche).

I must also mention that I liked Dylan having her own little plot (kicked off by Kenneth); although I was mildly disappointed that it only ended up being a setup to a closing-tag punchline ("Does everyone who plays a sport do it for JJ?"), I found it genuinely surprising and hilarious how she managed to drag her track teammates and coach into her existential quandary.

*- Several episodes before we saw him play electric guitar in "Road Trip," I had guessed Jimmy was likely a musician when I had first noticed that his "crap" included a broken keyboard (which ended up getting tossed in the trash again and crushed) and an acoustic guitar.

Edited February 26, 2017 by GRChereck