Four Weddings - General Discussion

[AltLivia]

I'm procrastinating, so here's some running commentary for y'all! 

 

And A Love Potion...Just a preliminary comment. I think she's the Orthodox wedding that takes the whole shebang, but could this girl please quit with the "hashtag!" business. You're an adult. The little hand gesture? Please.

 

Non-Jewish Nightclub Wedding - before I reread your reviews, I thought she was the unkempt bride. Her dress just fit her oddly - emphasized the tummy, looked boxy up top. Kind of standard, lacked any imagination. But I liked her wedding - save not having seats for everyone, and essentially having a junk food buffet at dinner.

 

Animal Attraction - If you have a peanut/food  allergy, I support you. Vegetarian/vegan? Fine. If you're gluten free, sure, go for it. Anything further than that I'm just like, "you sure are a special snowflake/ like making restaurant employees and your dining company miserable". That girl looked like the life was slowly draining from her. And her groom looked like Lurch. He instantly dropped her hands after the wedding smooch.  I wondered if her cake topper would be The Corpse Bride.

 

The large prehistoric fish at the sushi bar was disgusting.I could see giving the shindig a 5, which is still a low score. For a bad dinner, bad cake, little decor. Not a three, Nightclub! And I wouldn't have run from the animals. But I really don't want to pet a lion in my dressy best. Just a note: dear god, these brides sure love hanging crystals and gigantic centerpieces. Really? Hanging crystals? All right. Stunning, I guess.

 

Chemical Reaction - I hate this "unity" stuff, unless it's about a family. Sand stuff, chemicals, wine, dove release, butterfly release, zzzz, I've fallen asleep. You're in love, we get it. Also I figured out that Corpse Bride needs some eyebrow help. Meanwhile, Chem bride's dress was awful. Those "pickups" looked like bundled mosquito net. Her vows were incredibly sweet and the other brides (save Nightclub, who likes approximately no one*) seemed to bond with Chem Bride.

 

Orthodox bride - "Hashtag" business aside, that girl is a trip (in a good way). I loved her giant dress - she could probably have fun in anything, but the wedding was kind of shrug-worthy for me.

 

*The nastier her comments got, the more ugly and dumpy Nightclub became to me. And I swear, at one point during a Talking Head after Orthodox's wedding, you could see Nightclub's beige bra strap. Girl, wear a strapless bra with your one-shoulder dress. 

 

"...And A Cotton Ball," when the Cotton Bride first mentioned it I was like, oh dear, maybe everyone will handwave how tasteless plantations can be as a venue (with THAT THEME, too). But good for Valentine for mentioning it. I love that CB princess' uber-special dress (which made her look incredibly short-waisted) popped. But good lord, bridetestant, chill on CB keeping her hands in her pockets. Not everyone wants to show off jewelry.  Valentine was the sweetest - loved her goofing behind the bar. CB's groom looked like Howdy Doody.

 

Football Bride - I loved her ceremony arch. But again, hers was a dress so tight that it emphasizes every flaw (even those you don't have). Unity canvas. Snoozefest. I woke just in time to realize that it looked like excrement. I have seen that beer cozy favor before. I too, do not enjoy ravioli outside of standard meat, savory filling.  Also, accent notwithstanding, it's jarring to hear someone pronounce the L in "salmon"

 

Christmas Bride - I liked her, and she wasn't hyperactive "CHRISTMAS!SANTA!SANTA!" like most holiday themed brides on the show. Her dress was gorgeous (and I think it was/seemed like an Etsy dress). Dear bridetestants, when you have beautiful ceiling rafters, you don't decorate them. It detracts from the architecture. CB's comment about the hot sauce  in the chicken and waffles was just sour grapes at being bested. I loved the hot cocoa bar, and the mulled wine favor.

 

Valentine Bride - Oooh, that venue/reception space looks exceptionally cheap. And that dress looks like she's emerging from an ocean of tulle. Oh gosh, no matter the song, I can't handle singing in someone's face. It makes me cringe. The decor was sad. I wondered about an 8,000 dollar budget and almost 200 people. I did love how the contestants reacted to the homemade food - most people served homemade food on this show get snotty. I'm cool on pinning the money to the dress, but let 'em pin it and then take the money off. Don't dance that way all night!

Edited September 28, 2014 by ScullyInApt42

[BC Mama]

I did notice when the bride was presented (the one who won) the women in wigs.  Including the older woman in the blond wig.  The last Jewish wedding I attended I think more half the women wore wigs and they were all rather noticeable.  The first couple of times I had to stop myself from reaching out and smoothing it down a bit.  I'm such a twit sometimes.  There was something very, I don't know, comforting?  seeing so many traditional elements.  As a non-Jewish person it had a really nice Old World feel to it.  Was hers the wedding that the others complained about the service even as they sat back in the testing row?  Yeah there was a lot about that group that was unlikeable.

 

I was thrilled to see three Jewish weddings in one episode! But, I was disappointed in all of the snark. I had a pretty traditional Jewish wedding myself, and I think Arlene's wedding was such a joy (although my wedding was much more sedate). I had some flashbacks when they were dancing the hora! Ours felt like it went on forever, and I felt like I was on the verge of collapsing by the end. :) Good times. 

 

I think the thing with the football reception, was that a whole lot of those people wouldn't have shown up without being able to watch the games.

 

I agree! I am not a sports girl (unless my Maple Leafs make into the playoffs!) so I don't really get it, but it was important to the couple and a lot of the guests. My parents got married on Super Bowl Sunday (they think the Rabbi rushed through the ceremony so he could go watch the game) and there was definitely people sneaking off to check on the game in their cars.

[heebiejeebie]

I don't think there was any doubt that without the football access many of the guests would have found a way to watch the game anyway.   For me that wasn't the puzzler.  What was the puzzler was picking a date any decent fan knows is problematic three years prior.  You know Florida is a big game.  And the more important to the standings and season, the more likely it is going to be prime time airing.  She ended up thinking she was having it both ways.   But really she diluted both.  This from a (until recently) diehard family football gathering participant.  Home and away games, the fall football season is a huge family multi-month series of events.

 

For the non-football fans who might have traveled and put out considerable outlay, the wedding was a bit of a joke.  i can just imagine some of my relatives attending such a wedding and finding it loud and distracting from what they hoped would be a family event and a significant milestone for the family as well. 

 

For the footballs fans, no matter how many big screens, the distractions of the wedding would be annoying.  Even more so because they aren't cretins so would feel guilty for feeling the need to watch their game.  Add in lots of in state fans attending might have season tickets they now have to give up.  Even if they get face value, I can just imagine how happy they would be to lose out on going.  Let alone if Florida is really high in the rankings and your team manages to topple them. 

 

For me she tried to mix two things. Whether it was an odd attempt to match her fandom with her wedding or was some kind of control issue (I have seen way too many weddings the last couple of years where seemingly sweet brides and grooms really put out the entire party of guests in one way or another).  She ended up, again just me, really diluting at best the two by mixing them -- making neither the focus they should have been allowed for those who place importance on either.  Heck even if you got married on a game day that looks like a gimmee.  Or even easier, pick one of the 38 or so Saturday's they don't play.  Again, three years in advance.  You know when there is a 'by'.  i could have been thrilled she was getting married and a diehard fan and I would have been disgruntled even a little with how I had to spend my night in conjunction with both.

[Missy Vixen]

Also why would you sign up to compete on a show where you are so limited in what you can eat?

I was also mystified by the fact that woman could eat almost nothing the other brides served while complaining about that fact. If one's food allergies are that limiting, it might be a good idea to a) bring a snack or b) talk to the other brides beforehand to see what might be worked out as far as food. It's also not appropriate for her to downgrade them because of her food allergies -- if she doesn't speak up ahead of time, she has nobody to blame but herself.

[Missy Vixen]

The football themed bride: Regular season game? Important, but not the end of the world. A bride in the Seattle area got a ton of press because of her wedding, which was scheduled during this year's Super Bowl. I was astonished her now-husband didn't talk her into rescheduling.

 

I would have loved to go to the reception with the home-cooked food. It looked delicious.

 

Four Weddings loses its cheesy fun factor when viewers are confronted with overly competitive brides who will cut a bitch if they don't get a few days at a middling resort in Mexico. There are some things out of any bride's control. To dock her points because she had a religious ceremony longer than ten minutes or one's hair got messed up on the trolley ride to the ceremony -- ridiculous. I always wonder what happens after all the brides view the show, too. Any score below 5 shouldn't be allowed, IMHO.

[auntjess]

 

I always wonder what happens after all the brides view the show, too.

This is what I'd love to see.  Have a viewing with all of them there.  Wouldn't that be great fun, when they heard the comments?

[millk]

I know someone online who had a sister on the show and she said all the brides are friends/friendly now but there were some rocky moments after the show aired. (A Long Island episode - don't think I even remember which one it was sorry)

 

And yes, why  pick a date during the season if you are die hard fans? I live in an area where people are all about dirt track racing and have had friend who would never get married on a date when there was racing.

[Biosynth]

So, Jungle Wedding/food allergy bride.  At first I thought she was going to be fussy, but honestly, she didn't seem so bad.  Sure I get it that it felt annoying that she was always asking, but gosh, she gets sick from stuff, I would ask too if I had those allergies. 

 

She did seem very nice to the other brides and gave pretty good scores.  And I LOVED the animals at the wedding!  Oh my gosh, I would be all over that baby tiger.  I wanted her to win.  And I thought that Night Club bride was too nasty.  Giving her a 3?  Good grief woman, you had a wedding at a NIGHT CLUB!  I wouldn't have liked that, personally.  She introduced herself as a little too honest.  It irks me when people use that as an excuse to be rude.  Honesty shouldn't equal rudeness.  Sheesh, get some manners.

 

Football bride.  Ug.  I understand that it's important to her and her groom and some of her guests, but seriously, was this tail gait day or wedding day?  I like football to a degree, but I probably would leave early if the wedding was only football and people yelling at the tv screen.  I'm surprised they didn't spike a football instead of the kiss at the ceremony.

 

Though I agree that Valentine bride's wedding was a little on the tacky side, she herself was such a sweetie and she was good natured and fun.  She and her groom had a good time at their wedding.  And the food looked amazing!

 

And baby tiger.

Edited September 29, 2014 by Biosynth

[cpcathy]

You should only score below a five if, like, you didn't get FOOD TO EAT!

 

I still remember the bride (very young girl) who gave another a 2 because she and her husband were giggling through the ceremony.

[BC Mama]

I agree. You should not penalize a bride for how religious a ceremony is. A couple shouldn't dilute their faith to please the guests, or to get points! But, I was really surprised that they said the orthodox wedding was an hour. There are a other ceremonies that happen that day (like the bedeken where the groom places the bride's veil over her face, or the signing of the kettubah) but the chuppah, which is the portion the guest brides were at is usually pretty shot - like 20 to 30 minutes. I wonder if they were exaggerating because they were bored with a ceremony that was unfamiliar to them.

 

And, I agree with the criticisms of slouching Samantha. I am not a make-up girl myself, so I sympathize with a bride for not wanting to glam out on her wedding day (although I did get my hair done, and had a simple make-up job). But, if she wanted to go the no-make-up, no undo route, she would have been better off going with a simple flowing dress, and no tiara. I don't want to be mean, but she looked like an awkward pre-teen playing dress-up. And, I don't think it is fair to criticize anyone for not being able to accommodate some really extreme allergies. I think it is possible that because of the rules of the show, she might not have been able to let them know her restrictions, but she should have come prepared. I'm a vegetarian, and I don't expect people to go out of their way for me. 

Edited September 29, 2014 by BC Mama

[mjstrick]

I've probably seen just about every old episode of this show, but admit I haven't watched the new ones.  Probably due to the fact that I am the MOB for a wedding 5 days before Christmas in an SEC college town.  People always ask, "WHY December 20"?  Simple answer, football.

[peggy06]

Savannah episode last night. Not much that was noteworthy, except perhaps the surprise wedding. I thought that was a bad choice on her part. The surprise almost didn't come off, since she had to wave her hands and try to get attention of the crowd. It also always seems a bit of a burden to your guests to ask them to come in costume, but they did seem to be having fun, and at least it wasn't a tacky Halloween costume thing.

 

I would have been happy with either the first or the last wedding winning. The first had a nice ceremony setting, and that bride seemed like a genuinely nice person. Cheerful and smiling at the other weddings, and most of her comments were positive. The last wedding (Liz) was strictly traditional, but I think she won based on the beautiful table settings and flowers at the reception. Her dress was odd. I liked the lines, and the full but not bouffant skirt. I didn't like the sash and a piece of fabric overlay on the bodice that made it seem too fussy,

 

I actually missed the end of the Miami episode, so I hope someone can fill me in on who won. From what I saw, all of these weddings were fine. Nothing outstanding about any of them. I liked the bride who had the unfortunate gnat invasion at the ceremony because she seemed fun and nice at all the other weddings. She was really cute dancing with the little kid at wedding #1. Oh, and Desiree was gorgeous, but I think a couple of them low-balled her wedding because of too many orchids? Weird. The last wedding, I couldn't take my eyes off the dress because it seemed to fit oddly and overpowered the bride.

Edited October 4, 2014 by peggy06

[BradandJanet]

Well, one of the Miami brides did make a funny comment about worrying about the orchid population after seeing Desiree's wedding. I was wondering how much she spent on all those flowers.

[millk]

Surprise wedding bride made a good choice because with those eyebrows she is always surprised! 

 

Not a good idea to have a chocolate unity ceremony (is that even a thing?) when it is beyond hot out. Save it for an AC venue.

[cpcathy]

Little ceremonies like the sand ceremony and the chocolate thing (I DO think they made that up!) strike me as oh so precious, and especially if it's a zillion degrees outside, your guests can only think "Get to the I dos!"

 

No way Surprise Bride was 28, there's no way. If she was, her makeup did no favors for her.

[Patrizio]

The Savannah brides were interesting. Thought he train depot venue was different but drab, really needed more decoration and lighting. I liked this bride's dress, hair, and bouquet, the best; but emphatically agree with previous poster-she was no 28! LOL! I must confess that whenever I see the bald head/facial hair combo of the groom, I automatically think biker/civil war re-enactor; in either case-LOSER! Also, she needs to understand that her wedding was not edgy. Sorry. Hated the preacher's daughter bride. Way to show respect for your Dad, with the lap dance. I'm tired of these women describing themselves as "curvy". Honey, what you were in those bandage dresses you wore to the other weddings showed off rolls of fat, not a defined waist. Her wedding dress was too long, and her makeup was so thick that she resembled a drag queen. Whenever someone describes themselves as a DIVA, I know I'm gonna hate. Her food did look good though. The first bride with the halter dress was a sweet girl,  did'nt care for the dress though. She had the prettiest smile. Wedding was meh. Hate a drinking game at a wedding. The Asian bride's wedding was the nicest, I got the feeling that there was a wedding planner involved somewhere. Her dress did nothing for her, but  she was the Winner and MVP wedding guest so I give her major props for that accomplishment.

[BC Mama]

Personally, I don't like the idea of a surprise wedding. If I was invited from out of town, but declined in order to save money to attend the wedding, I'd be pissed. Perhaps they had no out of town guests, but that seems unlikely.

And, I didn't understand the costumes. What era was it supposed to be? There seemed to be costumes from a range of about a hundred years.

[poeticlicensed]

Savannah episode - The bride that won had stunning flowers and decorated her venue beautifully. And the groom was super-personable. My guess is that's part of why they won. Bride with the halter dress. OK, when you wear a halter you shouldn't wear a necklace. Curvy diva should have invested some money in the dresses she wore to the other weddings. To tight, too low cut. THey did a side shot of her in a green dress and I saw a whole lot of pink bra.  And sexy dances don't belong at weddings, period. I agree the surprise wedding did not work. And the venue was too dark. Perhaps to mask the fact that the bride was not 28. 

 

Miami weddings - I do not care for tons of colored uplighting, especially in pink and blue. The candy themed wedding looked like a kids b-day party. It was almost like she was casting about for a theme, because you must have a theme, and said well, I like candy. I do too, but that doesn't make it a good theme for a wedding. I love me some orchids, but that orchid wedding was overwhelming. Orchids are insanely expensive. 

 

Maybe I'm just showing my age, but I do not understand why you would be with someone for a very long time, have a couple of kids, then have a big wedding. Unless you are rolling in dough, why spend tens of thousands on a party? Put it in the kids college fund instead. 

[BC Mama]

Maybe I'm just showing my age, but I do not understand why you would be with someone for a very long time, have a couple of kids, then have a big wedding. Unless you are rolling in dough, why spend tens of thousands on a party? Put it in the kids college fund instead. 

 

My guess on this was when they got married, they could not afford the wedding they wanted. I remember my grandmother's cousin and husband, who are quite well off now, had a very elaborate high-end vow-renewal for their 50th anniversary. They had gotten married just before the groom was leaving to fight in WW2, and they were quite poor then. It was really sweet. 

[Patrizio]

I agree with poeticlicensed. I found one of the most distasteful winners was the one who had a three year old, then suprised the groom with the sonogram of their soon to be  second child in an intra-wedding video made after their big church wedding. I would think that anyone who has enough disposable income and their child's future is already secure, wouldnt feel the need to enter a contest for a free honeymoon. I guess I'm not figuring in the huge egos of some of these folks.

[peggy06]

Maybe I'm just showing my age, but I do not understand why you would be with someone for a very long time, have a couple of kids, then have a big wedding. Unless you are rolling in dough, why spend tens of thousands on a party? Put it in the kids college fund instead.

Well, I'm showing my age too then because I agree 100%. At some point, realize that ship has sailed and there are more important things in life than a fancy wedding.

[cpcathy]

Vow renewals also boil my blood. I can't watch Say Yes to the Dress any more because they're filled with older brides having a freaking vow renewal. I feel it's just a way to get to have another party and wear another pretty dress!

[auntjess]

I didn't hate any of these, but I was sorry Desiree won because of something she said, but can't remember what it was now. 
The tall one, Alexa, Andrea? called anothe dress bland, which seemed a strange description.  It was the one with skirt that was all ruffles.  Not my taste either, but I'd go for busy or gaudy, not bland.

Have you all noticed how much cheaper the weddings are this season?
Miami, which used have really expensive weddings, sometimes over $100K, had the most expensive, I think, at $28 K.
To me, that's a LOT, but not what it was.  I wonder if the wedding venue market tanked, like the real estate market did a few years back. 

That would be a good thing.
I liked Liz who won the second one, but I was rooting for Shey, because she was a nice guest.
And the old-faced surprise bride was my least favorite.
In the first show, I disliked Ashley, though I think she won, from the beginning.  She made a graceless remark at the meeting.
As to the unity ceremonies, let's move that to the off-top thread, because I'm sure we can come up with some inventive  ones.

[peggy06]

Vow renewals also boil my blood. I can't watch Say Yes to the Dress any more because they're filled with older brides having a freaking vow renewal. I feel it's just a way to get to have another party and wear another pretty dress!

Maybe the sheets and towels and electrical gadgets they got as gifts at the wedding are worn out and in need of replacement. :)

Edited October 6, 2014 by peggy06

[NikSac]

Personally, I don't like the idea of a surprise wedding. If I was invited from out of town, but declined in order to save money to attend the wedding, I'd be pissed. Perhaps they had no out of town guests, but that seems unlikely.

And, I didn't understand the costumes. What era was it supposed to be? There seemed to be costumes from a range of about a hundred years.

 

I agree and was thinking the same thing about the surprise wedding. I'd be pretty upset if I declined the engagement party in order to save money to attend the wedding, or because I didn't have the time/money/inclination to get a costume, etc. and found out I missed the wedding entirely. I hope her closest friends and family at least had some idea they really needed to be there.

 

I'm not a fan of the costume thing either. I got annoyed when the last wedding I went to had a strict "dress code" and it wasn't even a costume. I think I'd decline an engagement party like this just because I didn't have the right costume, but I'd still feel bad finding out it was actually the wedding. Then again, I don't really have friends who would do something like this, so maybe in her circle of friends none of it's all that out of the ordinary.

[auntjess]

If you want to do a vow renewal, fine, but you shouldn't be in a competition with folks who haven't had a wedding yet.

The (very few) vow renewal's I've been to, have had the bride wearing an age-appropriate dress, a long dress that a woman of middle age or old would wear, and NOT in white.

As far as spending money on a wedding that's more needed elsewhere, twice on Mike Holmes, I've heard couples say they had to postpone getting married because their home repair bills were so high.
Dammit, getting married is cheap.  What's a license, $25 or $50 bucks? 

You may not be able to afford a wedding, but you can afford a marriage.
 

Edited October 6, 2014 by auntjess

[Shugardrawers]

As long as we are airing our pet peeves about this show:

 

Putting brides up against each other with wildly disparate budgets.  If one spends 10k and another spends 100k who do you think will win?

 

CBs who judge based on things they personally don't like but aren't relevant.  One doesn't like red, another doesn't like white meat chicken, another docks points because the bride used silk flowers (when she's allergic to flowers so that makes total sense).  Another can't eat chocolate and so had to forgo the wedding cake.

 

Along the same lines:  CBs who dock points for something the bride had no control over:  It was an unseasonably cool day for an outdoor wedding in August.  My plated food was cold by the time I got it.  The waiter was rude and inexperienced.  There were a lot of bugs.  

 

And my biggest of all:  The couple didn't seem "in love"/affectionate enough.  Ok so they didn't consummate on the dance floor.  Maybe they have ultra conservative families or are not into big PDAs?  One even docked points because the GUESTS didn't dress up enough!

 

These "ladies" (and at times I use the term loosely) should be judging based on the stated categories:  Food (within the bride's control), venue, dress, overall experience, etc.  It was too cold for an outdoor (tented) reception in August is not a good reason to dock points.  The best she can do is move indoors IF space is available when the weather reports start to come in.  She made rain contingency plans what more do you want?  

 

Other than having a cash bar I can't see whining too much about what's served at a reception.  A bride can't accommodate EVERY request or her reception would cost a fortune.  Eat what you can and be glad you got a free meal out of it!  Now, if the food was TRULY bad (especially when the bride and groom had done a tasting) that MIGHT warrant some docking.  

 

These women need to stop thinking of themselves as the guests of honor and enjoy themselves.  The scores would be a lot fairer if compared to your average wedding and NOT the fantasy you have in your head.

(I still have no sympathy for the same sex brides who ordered in pizza for their reception and very little else.  TACKY!!!  CHEAP!!!)

[Shugardrawers]

As far as spending money on a wedding that's more needed elsewhere, twice on Mike Holmes, I've heard couples say they had to postpone getting married because their home repair bills were so high.

Dammit, getting married is cheap.  What's a license, $25 or $50 bucks? 

You may not be able to afford a wedding, but you can afford a marriage.

 

A-fricking-MEN!!!!  Are you wanting to get MARRIED or have a wedding?  Because that's two different things!

Edited October 6, 2014 by Shugardrawers

[NikSac]

As long as we are airing our pet peeves about this show:

 

Putting brides up against each other with wildly disparate budgets.  If one spends 10k and another spends 100k who do you think will win?

 

CBs who judge based on things they personally don't like but aren't relevant.  One doesn't like red, another doesn't like white meat chicken, another docks points because the bride used silk flowers (when she's allergic to flowers so that makes total sense).  Another can't eat chocolate and so had to forgo the wedding cake.

 

Along the same lines:  CBs who dock points for something the bride had no control over:  It was an unseasonably cool day for an outdoor wedding in August.  My plated food was cold by the time I got it.  The waiter was rude and inexperienced.  There were a lot of bugs.  

 

And my biggest of all:  The couple didn't seem "in love"/affectionate enough.  Ok so they didn't consummate on the dance floor.  Maybe they have ultra conservative families or are not into big PDAs?  One even docked points because the GUESTS didn't dress up enough!

 

These "ladies" (and at times I use the term loosely) should be judging based on the stated categories:  Food (within the bride's control), venue, dress, overall experience, etc.  It was too cold for an outdoor (tented) reception in August is not a good reason to dock points.  The best she can do is move indoors IF space is available when the weather reports start to come in.  She made rain contingency plans what more do you want?  

 

Other than having a cash bar I can't see whining too much about what's served at a reception.  A bride can't accommodate EVERY request or her reception would cost a fortune.  Eat what you can and be glad you got a free meal out of it!  Now, if the food was TRULY bad (especially when the bride and groom had done a tasting) that MIGHT warrant some docking.  

 

These women need to stop thinking of themselves as the guests of honor and enjoy themselves.  The scores would be a lot fairer if compared to your average wedding and NOT the fantasy you have in your head.

(I still have no sympathy for the same sex brides who ordered in pizza for their reception and very little else.  TACKY!!!  CHEAP!!!)

 

Is there any way to "like" this once per sentence?  Because this post deserves it!

 

The budget thing always drives me nuts. Actually I like it when the lower budget bride/couple wins in spite of their budget, but it bugs me that it's even a factor. They should match them somewhat equally.

 

I do think the guests are really important, but it's about the guests' comfort in general, not some over the top expectations. Example: I went to an outdoor wedding when it was 106 degrees out, and fairly last minute the bride/groom decided to make hand-held fans for the guests, did the best they could to provide some shade via patio umbrellas, found an indoor space where their elderly and heat-sensitive guests could at least see while inside, and made the ceremony way shorter. It was still full of love and commitment, but 5 minutes instead of 25. THAT to me was a "winning" wedding from a guest's perspective, and that's what I look for on this show - weddings where the couple gets a happy marriage but also do the best they can for their guests.

 

YES the guest brides who judge based on personal preference, or allergies, or whatever, drive me crazy too!  I can't even imagine faulting someone for serving something I happen to be allergic to or prefer not to eat. Silk flowers... if they look good, who cares?  If they look horrible then yes I can see it, but if they look nice then what does it matter if the guest bride likes fresh flowers better?

 

I can kind of see docking the food but only if it's really bad (which happens), but do people expect perfect food, to their tastes, and to perfect done-ness at a reception?  Although worse may be the brides that complain the food was too good and there was too much of it, and therefore they are too full and so the wedding gets a lower score.

 

I think I quietly give every wedding I go to now "scores" in my head and it makes me realize I probably need to stop watching this show - however, it's too entertaining, apparently. I give it a 6...

Edited October 6, 2014 by NikSac

[Quof]

Vow renewals also boil my blood. I can't watch Say Yes to the Dress any more because they're filled with older brides having a freaking vow renewal. I feel it's just a way to get to have another party and wear another pretty dress!

 

 

As Oprah says, I can buy a new dress and have a nice party with all my friends any time I want, without it being a wedding. 

 

Big vow renewals are all about getting attention. And gifts.

 

Edited cuz that last thought was mine, not Oprah's.

Edited October 6, 2014 by Quof

[BC Mama]

CBs who judge based on things they personally don't like but aren't relevant.  One doesn't like red, another doesn't like white meat chicken, another docks points because the bride used silk flowers (when she's allergic to flowers so that makes total sense).  Another can't eat chocolate and so had to forgo the wedding cake.

 

Along the same lines:  CBs who dock points for something the bride had no control over:  It was an unseasonably cool day for an outdoor wedding in August.  My plated food was cold by the time I got it.  The waiter was rude and inexperienced.  There were a lot of bugs.  

 

And my biggest of all:  The couple didn't seem "in love"/affectionate enough.  Ok so they didn't consummate on the dance floor.  Maybe they have ultra conservative families or are not into big PDAs?  One even docked points because the GUESTS didn't dress up enough!

 

These "ladies" (and at times I use the term loosely) should be judging based on the stated categories:  Food (within the bride's control), venue, dress, overall experience, etc.  It was too cold for an outdoor (tented) reception in August is not a good reason to dock points.  The best she can do is move indoors IF space is available when the weather reports start to come in.  She made rain contingency plans what more do you want?  

 

Other than having a cash bar I can't see whining too much about what's served at a reception.  A bride can't accommodate EVERY request or her reception would cost a fortune.  Eat what you can and be glad you got a free meal out of it!  Now, if the food was TRULY bad (especially when the bride and groom had done a tasting) that MIGHT warrant some docking.  

 

These women need to stop thinking of themselves as the guests of honor and enjoy themselves.  The scores would be a lot fairer if compared to your average wedding and NOT the fantasy you have in your head.

(I still have no sympathy for the same sex brides who ordered in pizza for their reception and very little else.  TACKY!!!  CHEAP!!!)

 

I cannot tell you how much I agree! It frustrates me to no end when a bride who in all other respects seems to have a fantastic time at a wedding gives a low score, because there was too much pink, or the church wasn't air-conditioned. I've been to many weddings that were quite different from what I would go for, but suit the couples, and is therefore lovely!

 

As for food, it is disappointing how many brides give low scores based on their own preference. I see this all the time with cuts of beef being over or underdone to their taste. Cooking red meat to everyones taste for a large crowd is impossible. If you are so particular about how you like your red meat cooked, order the chicken!

It would be refreshing for a bride to say, that wedding was not my style, but totally fit the couple's personality, so I am giving them an 8!

[peggy06]

One of my minor peeves is how often the guest brides say they liked a person's dress because "It suits their personality." I don't get that, and it's repeated so often. I am actually surprised by how little criticism is directed at the dresses. In that respect, at least, the CBs don't seem to be judging by their own tastes.

 

The more I think about this show, the less sense it makes. Maybe it's good that the season is ending. If we only knew, it's as fake as most reality shows, and the critiques aren't even genuine. That would explain why they sometimes don't seem to make sense. It's like you have to have something to criticize, or else you'd be giving everyone 9s and 10s. Then there'd be no show.

 

I guess I'm part of the problem, because I watch this and the other wedding shows on TLC. But it does seem like the wedding as an entity to itself has become a monster. How anyone can afford even $10,000 for a single day event is beyond me, and that would be considered a low-budget affair.

[Patrizio]

I've noticed that at each initial contestant meet and greet, they have someone saying "I'm going to win so y'all can just go home", or words to that effect. It's getting on my nerves. The Miami weddings used to be opulent, gaudy affairs; what happened? One thing that did'nt happen was someone having the brains to slip the guy riding the tractor during the first bride's ceremony a $20 to quit it for 15 minutes. I just can't with these brides with kids, I always subscribed to the saying; "One is a love child, two is just tacky". Her wedding was nice, and she looked good in her dress; but I can't see why she thought to be a contestant. The bride Shay's dress was stunning, her food looked really good, and the wedding cake looked pretty. Hated pretty much everything else, 95 degrees is too hot to have an outdoor wedding in full sunlight. The chocolate/wine ceremony was dumb. I fully expect someone to come out and make a PB&J at one of these ceremonies. The pink decor/uplighting in the reception space would seem more suitable for a sweet sixteen. She was a lovely lady though, and scored the others appropriately. Desiree AKA Orchid Bride had a nice venue, I thought the view was gorgeous. Her gown was OK (not really into the Pnina type thing), but I thought that the earrings were'nt a good choice. Nromally, I don't notice bridesmaids dresses, but hers were hideous; coupled with the "DESIGNER" sneakers, an unfortunate pairing. Her food looked really tasty though. I'm not big on tattoos, but, hers was beautiful and I did think that the tattoo table where you could apply your own orchid tattoo, was original and fun. The last bride looked like a gloomy Gus at all the other brides weddings. Seemed kind of nitpicky, so I figured her wedding was going to be something special. Nope! I don't think I have ever even heard of a cocktail hour being on the sidewalk of a venue. Now, watching this show some episodes back, there was a beach wedding that inexplicably had their cocktail hour in the parking lot (under tents) at the venue, but this truly was a first for the most poorly conceived idea ever. I thought her dress was odd, the bodice seemed like one of those molded jobs that the "curvy" girls wear,though she was slender, and the skirt was too long and needed another crinoline to give it shape. The headpiece reminded me of the 1980's and not in a good way. I had to laugh when one of the bride's said that the groom looked liked he was going to eat her face! One of the more distasteful kisses. I don't want to see tongue at a wedding ceremony. Her food did'nt look good at all either. No clear cut wedding MVP guest out of this bunch, Shay came closest though.

     I don't go to a wedding for the food, I'm sure no one does. However, I don't expect to be served crap either. If you can't afford decent food, you need to rethink your priorities. Same with not having an open bar, or having your wedding on a Tuesday.

Edited October 6, 2014 by Patrizio

[cpcathy]

You may not go to a wedding for food, but when you get there, and there is either NO food or inappropriate (meaning, not enough or just snacks) food, it makes a difference. I've remembered every wedding where I went home hungry and when I've had a nice full tummy.

[NikSac]

Patrizio I know what you mean on the meet 'n' greet - is this a new thing where one bride declares her victory right away?  Or did I just not notice it before?

 

I can't handle the brides with kids either, unless they really make it a point and make it understandable. Step-families come together all the time and I think there are neat ways to do it, but I don't get it when they're all of a sudden going "awww we have 2 kids together and we finally got married, now we can have a third kid!" I'm thinking "whaaaat?"  (especially the one who was like "oh well, we didn't win the honeymoon so I guess now I can plan for our third baby"). 

 

Agree too on the tractor thing, I can't believe someone didn't just go tell him "shhh!" for a few minutes. I'm sure the tractor driver would've taken a break if he could, with or without someone slipping him extra $$.  I'm surprised the venue didn't think of that first actually. It looked like somewhere that'd have a ceremony space, can't they have the construction go on hold for a few hours during prime ceremony time?

 

I'm kind of in favor of sneakers (or ballet flats, or whatever's comfy) for brides/bridal parties if it works okay with their personalities and theme, but I do think this one was pretty over the top with the custom sneakers. I bet the attendants and mothers of the bride/groom were pretty happy with the shoes though, even if they never wore them again.

 

I'm not normally a tattoo person but I really liked the tattoo station. I thought it was fun and helped the guests to feel included. Plus, unlike tatt-bride earlier in the season (or a rerun from previous season?), I was glad these were temporary.

[CoolMom]

As far as the food, to me it really depends on the time of day.  If I go to a wedding between 12-1pm or 6-7pm, I expect that there will be a meal because those are traditionally meal times.  DH and I got married at 1:30pm, we had heavy appetizers meaning fruit and cheese platters, meat trays, breads, crackers, veggies, and a few other things.  Even though it was not a meal time a lot of people commented on how much food we had, I just felt it was appropriate for the time of day.  Midday is not the time for a heavy meal. 

 

I have been to weddings at 3pm and totally did not expect a meal, one invitation even noted that it was a dessert reception (it was very nice). My niece got married at 7pm and had a full dinner.  

[NikSac]

You may not go to a wedding for food, but when you get there, and there is either NO food or inappropriate (meaning, not enough or just snacks) food, it makes a difference. I've remembered every wedding where I went home hungry and when I've had a nice full tummy.

 

Good point. I don't expect the food to be great, but I expect it to be reasonably okay and kept at a safe temperature. I do always seem to make mental note of the available fast food drive-thrus and late night dining options on the way there just in case, though.

[NikSac]

As far as the food, to me it really depends on the time of day.  If I go to a wedding between 12-1pm or 6-7pm, I expect that there will be a meal because those are traditionally meal times.  DH and I got married at 1:30pm, we had heavy appetizers meaning fruit and cheese platters, meat trays, breads, crackers, veggies, and a few other things.  Even though it was not a meal time a lot of people commented on how much food we had, I just felt it was appropriate for the time of day.  Midday is not the time for a heavy meal. 

 

I have been to weddings at 3pm and totally did not expect a meal, one invitation even noted that it was a dessert reception (it was very nice). My niece got married at 7pm and had a full dinner.  

 

I completely agree on the time. I don't expect some gourmet dinner at 2pm on a Tuesday. I think some of it's just about setting expectations with the guests. If you have a 6 or 7 pm wedding, people will expect to be fed unless you tell them otherwise.

 

Back to this show, I always thought about the $$ discrepancy but I hadn't really thought about the "type" of reception before. I wonder how much they take the day/time of the reception into account?  A Sunday morning brunch reception is going to be really, really different from a Friday night cocktail hour wedding and party.  The show should really put somewhat similar wedding types together, if they can.

[auntjess]

 

It would be refreshing for a bride to say, that wedding was not my style, but totally fit the couple's personality, so I am giving them an 8!

But you've bumped into one of my pet peeves.

I hate when they seem to be an expert on the style or personality of someone they met once.

"The gown totally fit her personality..."

If a bride is using a venue, especially outdoors, that isn't totally familiar to her, she should visit it on the same day of the week and at the same time, as the wedding.

Then you'd see that your beautiful site will be bakng in the sun for your noon wedding.

The worst failure along this line was a wedding that was held along the Brooklyn waterfront.  The trains ran every 2 or 3 minutes during the ceremony, and the rumble was very loud.

 

[BC Mama]

But you've bumped into one of my pet peeves.

I hate when they seem to be an expert on the style or personality of someone they met once.

"The gown totally fit her personality..."

 

I can see that. But, these women do spend time together (especially if it is the third or forth wedding), so I think it is completely reasonable to say that a bride's formal, black tie banquet hall wedding fits the personality of a conservative bride; or a barefoot beach front wedding officiated by a mime suits the personality of an eccentric performer couple! 

[rlc]

Totally agree that there shouldn't be such budget discrepancies between the weddings, but I'm equally annoyed when the other brides low ball a very expensive wedding. If it was truly bad, fine, but usually it's a comment along the lines of 'I was expecting more'. Cherubs could fly out of the brides butt and hold the train up through the ceremony and the other brides would complain that the cherubs didn't fit the theme.

[cpcathy]

Good point. I don't expect the food to be great, but I expect it to be reasonably okay and kept at a safe temperature. I do always seem to make mental note of the available fast food drive-thrus and late night dining options on the way there just in case, though.

 

I have actually left a wedding early, the friends that I came with and I were all hungry because there wasn't much food, and we had to go to Taco Bell.

[CoolMom]

I can see that. But, these women do spend time together (especially if it is the third or forth wedding), so I think it is completely reasonable to say that a bride's formal, black tie banquet hall wedding fits the personality of a conservative bride; or a barefoot beach front wedding officiated by a mime suits the personality of an eccentric performer couple! 

Some of the blogs say the order they show the weddings is not necessarily the order they took place.  So, I think this may or may not apply.  I always wonder how a dress or venue fits a personality.

[Shugardrawers]

I agree food should be reasonable but the scoring should be only what the bride has control over.  How was she to know that the steak, although cooked perfectly would be cooled off before it got to you?  How could she know a 17 year old waiter would be hired that would spill gravy everywhere?  She didn't!  And she sure couldn't know the temp would drop 25 degrees making it unseasonably cool on her wedding day even if she visited the venue the week before.  And if space is booked when she DOES get weather reports there's not much she can do.  

 

AND ANOTHER!!!!  The one a couple weeks ago where there was a party next door booked for the same time that was too loud.  Dollars to donuts the venue didn't tell the bride about it and how was she supposed to help that?  Yet EVERY CB docked her for it.

[Biosynth]

The one that irks me, and  you see it in every episode, "the church is nice, but it's not decorated enough."  Now now, some churches don't allow more than ribbons or a few flowers.  Most of that stuff is out of the bride's hands.  Besides, if it's a beautiful church, that speaks for itself!

 

I remember when I was looking at venues for my wedding years ago (I ended up eloping to Jamaica instead, haha) one of the churches I wanted wouldn't allow a unity candle, or any open flame that we brought ourselves.  I guess liability and insurance reasons.

 

And bravo to whomever said here that they next expect a unity PB&J sandwich.  Hahaha!

[NikSac]

The one that irks me, and  you see it in every episode, "the church is nice, but it's not decorated enough."  Now now, some churches don't allow more than ribbons or a few flowers.  Most of that stuff is out of the bride's hands.  Besides, if it's a beautiful church, that speaks for itself!

 

I remember when I was looking at venues for my wedding years ago (I ended up eloping to Jamaica instead, haha) one of the churches I wanted wouldn't allow a unity candle, or any open flame that we brought ourselves.  I guess liability and insurance reasons.

 

And bravo to whomever said here that they next expect a unity PB&J sandwich.  Hahaha!

 

I always wonder about the church critiques too!  I'm not a big church goer but when the guest brides complain about the decorating I'm always thinking "it's a beautiful church, what more do you want???"

 

Eloping to Jamaica, good thinking!

 

My husband would've been so in favor of the unity PB&J. He would've insisted on having honey on it too, though.

[CoolMom]

The one that irks me, and  you see it in every episode, "the church is nice, but it's not decorated enough."  Now now, some churches don't allow more than ribbons or a few flowers.  Most of that stuff is out of the bride's hands.  Besides, if it's a beautiful church, that speaks for itself!

 

I remember when I was looking at venues for my wedding years ago (I ended up eloping to Jamaica instead, haha) one of the churches I wanted wouldn't allow a unity candle, or any open flame that we brought ourselves.  I guess liability and insurance reasons.

 

And bravo to whomever said here that they next expect a unity PB&J sandwich.  Hahaha!

I used to attend a very large, beautiful church, people loved using it as a wedding venue.  After a while they had to enact strict rules about using the building because people who were not church members did not appreciate that the building was a CHURCH not just a pretty building (a bride and her bridal party drinking Jack Daniels in the bride room or a groom and groomsmen who decided it was ok to smoke in a classroom that they were using to get ready). Many decided the rules were not worth dealing with after a while.  They did (still do) have very strict rules about decorating, food and drink brought into the rooms, etc.  You have to use their decor for the aisle, that decor is beautiful and real flowers plus ribbon can be added but not every bride wants to have the same aisle decor as the 100's of others before them.  They also will only let you use the candle stands, arch and other decor owned by the church.  I believe it is because they can control the candles which are drip-less candles or the lights that look like candles because if you don't use those they drip and make a mess that is near impossible to clean afterward.

 

On that note every church I have been in for weddings will tell brides that they cannot have XYZ for insurance purposes but it is usually because the church doesn't want to deal with it.  Especially when it comes to candles mostly for the reason noted above.

[auntjess]

Our church only allowed weddings on Sunday, because under their plan with the utility company, they had a flat rate, but prices went sky high if they went over the limit.
Heating, or especially cooling the sanctuary, for any other day, once cost an added $500.  Hence the rule.

[cpcathy]

I always wonder about the church critiques too!  I'm not a big church goer but when the guest brides complain about the decorating I'm always thinking "it's a beautiful church, what more do you want???"

 

 

 

I don't understand decorating something that's already beautiful as well. Churches don't need a lot of crap put in them to look attractive. Lots of decorations in a church usually look really tacky to me. Also lovely outdoor venues, when the brides say "it's just so plain." If it's a garden or a location with a grand oak tree, don't put tulle and junk all over it.

[glow]

I don't like it when they criticize the ceremony being in a different language, or it being too long (or too short). I also don't get when they give a 5 or a 3 and the only negative they give (that we're told) is something tres small.

 

But I always thought it was a fun way to learn how to put on a wedding. You now have to think of it from your guests' point of view. I too remember going to a wedding and the bride, groom and wedding party went out for pictures; we're in a church in the middle of the suburbs so there's no cocktail hour and nothing close by; and there's hours before the reception. Before, you'd have the bride's POV that it's all about her. But now, you're thinking of brides thinking of their guests and that would result in a 5 and a loss of a cute honeymoon. I now realize that you're making guests stay out, on their feet, take care of them, give them food, etc. That's just me so I was tickled to see a bride who learned how to do weddings by watching 4 Weddings. I was so happy she won.