All Episodes Talk: All Rise

[pagooey]

Plaintiff with the big heart tattoo on her chest, had a piece of black (electrical?) tape covering up part of it. Makes me wonder what it says.

"Fuckerbitches 4-Eva"

[Toaster Strudel]

WOW guys - a 4-fer today!

 

The only stand out for me was the $20G under the mattress?  I think they wanted to scam the show.

[BellaLugosi]

Did laptop/ipad girl not understand she won the bulk of her case? JJ told her she was giving her the cost of the laptop and the previous balance.  The one who owned the credit card said something about her promising to pay off half the amount, she got all of it. 

[DoctorK]

For Miss Heart Tattoo, I watched closely (after seeing the issue raised here) and I don't think it was tape. It was not shiny black electrical tape, and it showed some surface texture with a light mottling (like the solid black of a tattoo under pale skin) and seemed to move like it was skin. My guess is that she got the tattoo during one of her romances that will never end and got the tattoo with his name in it. Weeks later when he moved out of the trailer park to live with his baby momma, she got mad, couldn't afford to get the tattoo removed or covered by a real tattoo artist, so just had a friend tattoo a black ink rectangle with a needle and ball point ink, to cover the name while she sat in the kitchen drinking a beer. Or maybe it was just magic marker?

Edited June 11, 2014 by DoctorK

[BellaLugosi]

I thought she'd just Sharpied it. 

[califred]

I had forgotten about the over paid reservist. As a military spouse any time we even think they've overpaid my husband it stays in right in our savings account b/c while they are not fast to give you money they are very fast in taking it back. That whole thing was a sham.

[BellaLugosi]

Her whole story made no sense. She said she received 2 checks and they told her to keep them. She said they would debit them back. "Debit them back" makes  it sound like it was a direct deposit, not a check. Either way, why did she take the money out? I think they were attempting a scam, and using cash wouldn't have a paper trail. 

[Patssy Stoned]

Weeks later when he moved out of the trailer park to live with his baby momma,

 

 

Or go to jail for either domestic violence or drunken driving....

[lofty ideas]

Wow, quadruple smack-down! I don't recall having one of those before.

I want to know what substances defendant Benny Thompson (I'm so tired) had ingested. I tutor a rambunctious third-grader who doesn't behave that badly. The outsized gestures, the monosyllabic responses to Byrd. Classic!

[DoctorK]

Jeez, I really wish Byrd was allowed to hit people. Never underestimate a grizzled old guy.

[AngelaHunter]

Jeez, I really wish Byrd was allowed to hit people.

 

Me too! It's always been my dream to hear JJ say, "Byrd, do me a favour. Go over there and slap the taste out of his/her mouth."

 

Four cases in one half hour must be a record. It would speed things up even more if there were trap doors under the litigants so so JJ could just push a button and her "Case dismissed" would result in all parties disappearing from sight instantly. OTOH, we would miss out on their entertaining reactions, "Hey hey, Miss Judy", "This is bullshit"  "What about my computer?" and "Fucking bitch".

[Milz]

 The outsized gestures, the monosyllabic responses to Byrd. Classic!

 

Don't forget the over-sized shiny shirt.

 

Re: Tattoo Heart cover up

 

Thanks for all the thoughts on that one. It just looked odd (and it looked like a piece of tape to me at least) :-)

[augmentedfourth]

Don't forget the over-sized shiny shirt.

That was clearly purchased especially for his television debut because it still had the square shaped creases in it from being folded in the packaging.

[Milz]

To bad he didn't have MC Hammer parachute pants to go with the shiny shirt. That would have been da bomb!

[BellaLugosi]

 

Four cases in one half hour must be a record. It would speed things up even more if there were trap doors under the litigants so so JJ could just push a button and her "Case dismissed" would result in all parties disappearing from sight instantly. OTOH, we would miss out on their entertaining reactions, "Hey hey, Miss Judy", "This is bullshit"  "What about my computer?" and "Fucking bitch".

 

Oh that would be wonderful. Delightful, even.

[Sarcastico]

There was a "quadrafecta" show a couple of seasons ago.  One of the 4 cases was a middle-aged man suing his younger female cousin for some damn thing.  But what was weird (by our standards but not by the standards of JJ litigants) was that the plaintiff 1) seemed to be having a sexual affair with this cousin and 2) seemed to be mentally handicapped.  Judy actually took his sister back into chambers to have a talk with her -- no cameras allowed. Can't remember the exact outcome of the case.  

Edited June 12, 2014 by Sarcastico

[Rick Kitchen]

It looked to me like in today's show where the wife was suing the ex-husband over something to do with a house, Judy realized halfway through badmouthing the ex, the defendant, that he was actually in the right, but instead of apologizing to him for treating him so badly, she just dismissed the case without awarding the ex-wife anything.

[AngelaHunter]

Guys, can we dial it back on the phonetic slang talk? I know you're doing it for comedic effect, but it's hard to read (and potentially offensive to some).  Thanks.

 

I'm sorry but I don't quite understand. The horrendous grammar, malapropisms, and messed up pronounciations of litigants for whom English is a first language has always been a source of hilarity, especially when said litigants claim to be college students. When quoting someone from the show are we supposed to edit it into proper English first?

[DoctorK]

 

that he was actually in the right,

I am not totally convinced that he was in the right and his inability to deal with dates concerned me but at a minimum JJ should have let him try to explain. If he was indeed a skilled machinist and worked at it for  twenty years (which didn't seem to match with his age) he could have saved a fair amount of money. He also tried to tell her that he had cashed out or borrowed against his 401k; if this is true he may be financially knowledgeable and he may have had enough money to pay a $900/month mortgage payment when the plaintiff didn't pay her agreed upon share. I think JJ stumbled over some issues here:

1) she doesn't feel at a gut level that $900 may have been a huge amount of money when she was younger but not any more;

2) you don't have to have a law degree to make good money, a skilled machinist can easily out earn a run of the mill lawyer

3) she seems constitutionally unable to admit she is wrong

Like I said, I am not automatically buying the defendant's case but he sure didn't get an opportunity to state his case. Maybe it really is retirement time for JJ - sit back, enjoy your granchildren and money.

Edited June 12, 2014 by DoctorK

[Guest]

I'm sorry but I don't quite understand. The horrendous grammar, malapropisms, and messed up pronounciations of litigants for whom English is a first language has always been a source of hilarity, especially when said litigants claim to be college students. When quoting someone from the show are we supposed to edit it into proper English first?

 

You can quote the litigants, bad grammar and all; just don't spell the words phonetically.

[DoctorK]

How is quoting butchered pronounciation different from quoting butchered grammar? Just asking.

[Talented Tenth]

I'm sorry but I don't quite understand. The horrendous grammar, malapropisms, and messed up pronounciations of litigants for whom English is a first language has always been a source of hilarity, especially when said litigants claim to be college students. When quoting someone from the show are we supposed to edit it into proper English first?

 

In an earlier post, someone didn't quote an actual litigant, but took on the persona of an imaginary litigant with a stereotypical black affect which is an example of something that can be offensive.  Almost always the ones taking on a stereotypical persona don't understand the nuances involved in the vernacular of other groups and end up exaggerating and structuring a sentence in a way that is unrealistic.  It can come off as mocking the group a person belongs to instead of the individual.  There are places for that, but not here.

 

Judge Judy is increasingly nasty.   She said she was bored of both of the litigants in the case involving a defendant who ran the plaintiff's car into a utility pole and totaled it.  I didn't see what the plaintiff did to deserve that.

Edited June 13, 2014 by Talented Tenth

[Intocats]

How is quoting butchered pronounciation different from quoting butchered grammar? Just asking.

I think what CuriousParker is trying to get at in a roundabout way is that it's okay to make fun of bad grammar and malapropisms but not to mock ethnic or racial speech patterns.

[Guest]

Since the backwoods "My America" affiliate I watch JJ on can't ever get the case titles right on the on-screen guide, I don't know whether this is a new or old case, but there was a Plaintiff on today whose name was "Ms. Graham." Now I don't know whether her mother was Gloria Steinam's #1 fan or whether she was in the witness protection program or she was too dumb to remember her own first name, but I think that might have been a JJ first. I am also left to wonder if she has a brother named "Mr" or "Sir."

[DoctorK]

 

I am also left to wonder if she has a brother named "Mr" or "Sir."

 

Or if you are a Garrison Keillor fan, maybe "Senator".

[EtheltoTillie]

Time and date challenged machinist defendant did not do himself any favors when he told JJ that she was taking medication too.

[Guest]

In an earlier post, someone didn't quote an actual litigant, but took on the persona of an imaginary litigant with a stereotypical black affect which is an example of something that can be offensive.  Almost always the ones taking on a stereotypical persona don't understand the nuances involved in the vernacular of other groups and end up exaggerating and structuring a sentence in a way that is unrealistic.  It can come off as mocking the group a person belongs to instead of the individual.  There are places for that, but not here.

 

 

I think what CuriousParker is trying to get at in a roundabout way is that it's okay to make fun of bad grammar and malapropisms but not to mock ethnic or racial speech patterns.

 

This is the point exactly. 

 

The story of my life?  People saying things in a much better way than I ever could.  :) 

[goodogcarl]

Time and date challenged machinist defendant did not do himself any favors when he told JJ that she was taking medication too.

She SO richly deserved that smackdown. She's always asking the general question, "Are you on medication?", implying they're mentally ill.  She was a terrible snot to the defendant. . . . and she probably IS on medication!

[DoctorK]

 

She's always asking the general question, "Are you on medication?", implying they're mentally ill.

Exactly, it is the classic lie of telling part of the truth but implying something different. I take medication for hypertension, but JJ's verbal maneuver would leave the impression that I am on psychoactive medication for mental issues so she would score a touche! moment.

 

ETA: nice JJ stuff on Lileks blog today:

http://lileks.com/bleats/archive/14/0614/061314.html

Edited June 13, 2014 by DoctorK

[Milz]

 

I take medication for hypertension, but JJ's verbal maneuver would leave the impression that I am on psychoactive medication for mental issues so she would score a touche! moment.

 

IIRC her asking a defendant, "How much have you had to drink before you came to court today, sir!!!!!"  Implying that the drink was alcohol, not orange juice or coffee.

[CoyoteBlue]

I resent her implication that everyone with a mental illness would somehow be unreliable witnesses or act out in irrational manners. My depression and ADHD does not mean my testimony would be less valid than someone else's. And taking the medication means you're actually treating it, so there's even less reason to blame actions on mental illness. 

[BellaLugosi]

I don't think that's what she's implying at all. She's implying that there's a medication that the person should be on, and/or they haven't taken it today. She's attributing the behavior to a lack of medication. That one guy just tried to turn it around. 

[Patssy Stoned]

Wow--she was an f'n bitch to the machinest yesterday.  I was horrified.  And it prompted me to remove her {once again}from my line up.  Just plain nasty w/o a good cause.

 

Time for the Judester to retire.

Edited June 13, 2014 by Patssy Stoned

[designing1]

 

I don't think that's what she's implying at all. She's implying that there's a medication that the person should be on, and/or they haven't taken it today. She's attributing the behavior to a lack of medication. That one guy just tried to turn it around.

 

I always assumed she was implying either this ^^^ or more likely that the person is perhaps misusing medication for entertainment purposes.

Edited June 13, 2014 by designing1

[Ouisch]

I'm usually loathe to pick on a person's physical appearance, since I'm no oil painting myself, but did anyone else think the plaintiff whose car got wrapped around a utility pole by the guy who was supposedly repairing it looked just a tad....unusual? I've never seen shoulders that sloped downward at such a severe angle. I felt bad for the guy, though, what with JJ pooh-poohing the loss of his old and already beat-up car and voicing her boredom with his case.

[ItsHelloPattiagain]

 

Time and date challenged machinist defendant did not do himself any favors when he told JJ that she was taking medication too.

That dude had an increasing case of assbitchery going until I was afraid Bird was going to go over and give him the heavy duty lean with the heavy scary whisper. Note to defendants - pissing off the judge doesn't do you any favors. 

 

Old-Car-Wrapped-Around-Pole guy didn't have a neck. Reminded me of carny folk. 

[6 MeowMeowBeenz]

HelloPatti, I believe you cannot use the reference "carny folk" too many times, particularly in reference to most JJ litigants. Carry on :)

[Rick Kitchen]

Today there was a man suing his ex (girlfriend, I think, never wife) over child support she kept even though their son was living with him for 14 months.  The woman never put his name on the birth certificate and didn't even claim that the guy was the father till the boy was 11 years old and the woman decided she needed child support.  The guy has support taken out of his pay check, so the money was still coming out of his pay even though she had sent the boy to live with his newly-discovered father (well, not that new, the kid just turned 18).  The woman had so brain washed the son into hating his father, it wasn't funny.  He tried to testify on his mother's behalf, but never really got what he was trying to claim through except to make his mother look worse and worse and his father better and better.  The father even took in a friend of his son's while the kid was living with him, and even when he was living with his mother, his father sent him extra money.  But the mother never gave him any money when he was living with her, and never sent child support to support him while he was living with his father, but the kid clearly thinks his mother can do no wrong.

[zillabreeze]

 

You can quote the litigants, bad grammar and all; just don't spell the words phonetically.

Oh my.  If I started this by using the word "gubmint", I truly apologize.  I borrowed the word from the late, great Molly Ivins who used it in her liberal rants against the government and all the stupid things it does.  In my circle we have used it for years as a slam against politicians and their ridiculous money wasting nonsense in general.

 

If I offended anyone, please accept my deepest apologies.

Edited June 13, 2014 by zillabreeze

[Zahdii]

I'm usually loathe to pick on a person's physical appearance, since I'm no oil painting myself, but did anyone else think the plaintiff whose car got wrapped around a utility pole by the guy who was supposedly repairing it looked just a tad....unusual? I've never seen shoulders that sloped downward at such a severe angle. I felt bad for the guy, though, what with JJ pooh-poohing the loss of his old and already beat-up car and voicing her boredom with his case.

 

I could be wrong, but I once knew a guy who had the same problem, just not as bad.  He had scoliosis of the spine, and his parents opted not treat it.  Nothing the state could do, at least back then, because it wasn't a life threatening issue.  Anyway, as he grew up, his shoulders sloped quite a bit, and he developed a 'widow's hump' that caused his neck to lean forward, making his neck seem to almost disappear and his head looked like it was resting just on top of his shoulders.  He was frantic to earn as much money as possible to try to fix the problem, or he'd be almost incapacitated by spinal arthritis by the time he was 50.

 

I've seen JJ be very understanding with people with disabilities in the past, but maybe she hasn't had to deal with this type of disability before (if the plaintiff does in fact have untreated scoliosis).  Either way, I wonder if there was more to the case than we were seeing.  Then again, I've watched her become more and more intolerant over time and I think she should retire.  Too bad she just signed on for another three years.

[califred]

I can't believe the woman whose house got hit by a car thought she could sue her tennants for rent after they chose to m

Chose to move, she's lucky they stayed in January.

Also my favorite " I wouldn't let him sell the car bc my Daddy, etc caught a murder case over it and I'm keeping it for sentimental value"

I'm also not a fan of her being upset that the woman wasn't using her "housing money" for housing. The Military gives you housing money based on where you are stationed and you are entitled to it whether you pay no rent or not. And often rent is more than your housing allowance. The way she said the military is supporting you was just odd. My husband works a zillion hours, he just happens to work for the military.

[BellaLugosi]

That last case in the car-through-house episode was a snooze. The show had to have paid over $5000 by the time they paid the judgement and the expenses.  For what? The wife to sign over the title. 

 

Of course miss no structural damage made up for it. I would preferred seeing more of the other two cases. In the car/house case, did they mention if they'd given notice?  If the damage was no big deal, why did it take three months to fix?

[Guest]

I'm usually loathe to pick on a person's physical appearance, since I'm no oil painting myself, but did anyone else think the plaintiff whose car got wrapped around a utility pole by the guy who was supposedly repairing it looked just a tad....unusual

Aw. Yeah. I felt sorry for him. He seemed like a nice guy and I just KNEW he was picked on his entire life because of his unusual looks. I was just hoping JJ wouldn't be a dick to him.

Plus! He had a Walter White Pontiac Aztec!

[Ouisch]

Aw. Yeah. I felt sorry for him. He seemed like a nice guy and I just KNEW he was picked on his entire life because of his unusual looks. I was just hoping JJ wouldn't be a dick to him.

Plus! He had a Walter White Pontiac Aztec!

I'm an awful person....when he mentioned that he'd owned an Aztec, I commented that he must've been born and grown up in the back seat and taken on the shape of that car. (I've always found Aztecs to be ugly, and I live in Metro Detroit - the Motor City - where we had tons of 'em at one time.) At least JJ awarded him the cost of his vehicle.

I believe it was a rerun, but I couldn't help but laugh at the defendant who refused to repay her cousin (who'd been like a sister to her) for bailing out her husband who had "I dunno...two or three..." outstanding child support warrants, or for the car she'd helped her buy. Why not sell their existing car? Why, it has sentimental value! Was her child born in the back seat when she got stuck in traffic en route to the hospital? Did she use it to drive to the White House to pick up her Congressional Medal of Honor? No, her father and brother are now serving prison sentences for a murder that somehow involved that vehicle.

[khyber]

You can quote the litigants, bad grammar and all; just don't spell the words phonetically.

Since many times their "words" are not really words, then how can you spell them other than phonetically?

Oh my.  If I started this by using the word "gubmint", I truly apologize.  I borrowed the word from the late, great Molly Ivins who used it in her liberal rants against the government and all the stupid things it does.  In my circle we have used it for years as a slam against politicians and their ridiculous money wasting nonsense in general.

 

If I offended anyone, please accept my deepest apologies.

You have nothing to apologize for. There are plenty of rural white people in various parts of the country that use that exact pronunciation.  

[MrMattyMatt]

I'm also not a fan of her being upset that the woman wasn't using her "housing money" for housing. The Military gives you housing money based on where you are stationed and you are entitled to it whether you pay no rent or not. And often rent is more than your housing allowance. The way she said the military is supporting you was just odd. My husband works a zillion hours, he just happens to work for the military.

I thought this was a quick goodbye on the case too, but wasn't she sueing for rent money from the defendant?  I think JJ was just pissed that since she was living rent free in the first place why should she expect payment - I don't know the whole thing was quick and odd.

[augmentedfourth]

THE RETURN OF EURYDICE AND THE NASTY-ASS "MINK" JACKET ON THE SATURDAY NIGHT RERUN! My weekend, it is complete. That was a classic.

[Patssy Stoned]

THE RETURN OF EURYDICE AND THE NASTY-ASS "MINK" JACKET ON THE SATURDAY NIGHT RERUN! My weekend, it is complete. That was a classic.

 

 

I have bathmats more luxurious than that ratty thing!  Her facial expressions were PRICELESS when JJ told her to give it back!

[lofty ideas]

Don't forget the matching handbag that Eurydice proudly proclaimed was hers. And her piece of advice for her ex, poor Mr. Hudson, "I told him you can't buy love, you just rent it."

I'd like to see him sue the furrier for fraud in representing the jacket as "mink".

[Milz]

And she was so proud of that "mink" too.

 

Gah, it looked like teddy bear that a kid's been chewing on and playing with for the last 4 years.