All Episodes Talk: All Rise

[Rick Kitchen]

I nominate Catherine Baldwin for best hairdo evah.  I wonder how long all of those sausages take to do.  And the color is nothing that occurs in nature.

[Brattinella]

"Business Deal Gone Bad"??  NO you are a CROOK!

 

Sausage Curl Girl?  Yikes who told you that was a good look?

 

Anime Raccoons, wowie!

 

And hooker with the door-knocker earrings and the skirt up to her eyebrows.  No words.

[Puffaroo]

Lately I have been so distracted by the hairdos and basic body habitus of the litigants that I cannot even concentrate on the cases. What the FRICK was up with Shirley Temple?

 

Y'know, I rather suspect that some of these wildly coiffed and styled litigants do that on purpose so they won't be recognized in real life, wearing regular hair and clothes.  Not all of 'em, certainly, but I'm betting Shirley Temple was.

[Florinaldo]

When the fashion faux-pas are more interesting than the cases themselves, you know it's a slow day on JJ.

 

I actually felt bad for the parking lot tattoo lady's cruel life predicament. She obviously spent so much money on the scrap metal necessary to fashion her oh-so-tasteful earrings and other bling bling, that she did not have enough money left to buy a sufficient amount of material for her made-to-measure potato sack. She is one of the socially disadvantaged I tell you; oh, the tragedy of it all. I also thought that perhaps her insurance policy may have a very high deductible, which would make it unproductive to file a claim.

 

As for Shirley Temple, I wonder if there is a remake of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? in the works. She probably came straight from the auditions. I hope she does not wear that hairdo on the job because some of the Bette Davis fans in her care will have nightmares from it.

 

I was willing to cut her some slack because she did have to go through life with that rapacious mother of hers. But my generosity gets cancelled for answering at least one question with a fart noise.

[AngelaHunter]

I need everyone to go to Google and do a image search for Baby Doll Batman and I can almost promise you will laugh your ass off

 

Googled as instructed. Ass duly laughed off.

[WhoaWhoKnew]

I ain't never seen a bitch in real life with hair like Catherine Baldwin. I need everyone to go to Google and do a image search for Baby Doll Batman and I can almost promise you will laugh your ass off. Seeing these Gotham commercials interspersed with that case was too much. I was over here getting my fucking life. The mother better watch out because that chick is gonna get Killer Croc to bust that ass in the parking lot.

Baby Doll is my favorite villain from Batman:TAS. I'm so glad you made this reference.

Edited November 14, 2014 by WhoaWhoKnew

[Intocats]

I did.

 

http://www.gofundme.com/childrenneedfamily

 

Nice work, Toaster Strudel! :)

 

Eric and his ex (can't remember her name, now) might be kinksters extraordinaire, but those kids are cute as all heck. I hope everything works out okay for them.

[knitorpurl]

The repossessed car guy's story just slowly unspooled with every question JJ threw at him. She was in fine form indeed- got him and his witness to tell all sorts of things they had no intention of admitting when they walked in. Too bad she resorts to yelling and snarling so often, because this was a classic case of JJ at her best. 

[AngelaHunter]

When the fashion faux-pas are more interesting than the cases themselves, you know it's a slow day on JJ.

 

I actually felt bad for the parking lot tattoo lady's cruel life predicament. She obviously spent so much money on the scrap metal necessary to fashion her oh-so-tasteful earrings and other bling bling, that she did not have enough money left to buy a sufficient amount of material for her made-to-measure potato sack. She is one of the socially disadvantaged I tell you; oh, the tragedy of it all. I also thought that perhaps her insurance policy may have a very high deductible, which would make it unproductive to file a claim.

 

As for Shirley Temple, I wonder if there is a remake of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? in the works. She probably came straight from the auditions. I hope she does not wear that hairdo on the job because some of the Bette Davis fans in her care will have nightmares from it.

 

I was willing to cut her some slack because she did have to go through life with that rapacious mother of hers. But my generosity gets cancelled for answering at least one question with a fart noise.

 

 

I really think we need to have some sort of Snark Awards here.  I haven't seen Sarcastico around in awhile (wherever you are, I still love you!) but stuff like this makes me not miss him quite as much.

 

Bravo!

[Intocats]

As for Shirley Temple, I wonder if there is a remake of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? in the works. She probably came straight from the auditions. I hope she does not wear that hairdo on the job because some of the Bette Davis fans in her care will have nightmares from it.

 

I was willing to cut her some slack because she did have to go through life with that rapacious mother of hers. But my generosity gets cancelled for answering at least one question with a fart noise.

Was that fart noise a JJ first?  I don't blame Shirley...if she were my mother, I'd blow raspberries, too.

 

Shirley Temple and Anime Raccoon from the other case should team up for a sitcom. Two wacky sisters working the Lancôme kiosk at Macys....hilarity and hijinks ensue! Then Mama Raccoon joins the sales team and the real fun begins!

[lovesnark]

I'm betting the oh so lovely tattooed, near crotch baring, armor style earring wearing woman didn't want to involve her insurance company because this was her umpteenth accident and she knew they'd cancel her or raise her rates through the roof. Those caterpillars she had glued onto her eyelids surely make it difficult to see, let alone drive. When she was over at the accident scene board, bitch could barely keep her eyes open from the sheer weight of those fake lashes.

 

I was totally mesmerized by Shirley Temple's hair. Baby Jane, indeed!

[kermitlvr]

So I was watching the drug dealing car salesman and I noticed that there is a piece of tape over the logo on his shirt.  The funny thing is that it is so obvious since the red tape does not match his red shirt.  Does anyone know why they do that?  I have seen it on other JJ episodes.  Maybe it's so the company doesn't get negative press for the losers on JJ wearing their clothes.

[BubblingKettle]

So I was watching the drug dealing car salesman and I noticed that there is a piece of tape over the logo on his shirt.  The funny thing is that it is so obvious since the red tape does not match his red shirt.  Does anyone know why they do that?  I have seen it on other JJ episodes.  Maybe it's so the company doesn't get negative press for the losers on JJ wearing their clothes.

Trademarked product names and logos can be covered up or pixellated if the company didn't pay for product placement.  It's weird, though -- it seems like some brands get a pass, even though I can't imagine them paying for placement.  The tape on the drug dealing car salesman's shirt distracted me too.  I wonder if it was one of his work shirts, and production said, "No free advertising."  If that did happen, they unintentionally did his business a small favor...otherwise, viewers in his area would know the name and logo to AVOID when car shopping.

[27bored]

Is the case with the drug dealing car salesman online anywhere?

[designing1]

JJ Name of the Day: The friend/unpaid professional caregiver for the plaintiff in the drunken brawl case was named RaeRene Colliflower. Bonus points for creative capitalization.

[Toaster Strudel]

A Real Good Buzz... In The Eye! - I wasn't sure where this one was headed, it never goes well when you have a drunk plaintiff and a drunk defendant.  But given the hilarious description that the arresting officer made of the defendant's behavior, crying, apologizing, aggression, etc, I think even JJ started to believe that he had been capable of randomly punching the other guy in the eye. 

 

By The Book Squatters - You got to love some squatters that don't pay rent in a foreclosed home for 10 months, but get all "by the book" when the new owner shows up and is willing to let them carry on a while longer if they pay rent.  Did they want JJ to believe they left a dog behind for a few weeks?  They said they moved out in July... "in the process of"... and the dog was still there in August?  I couldn't believe that the new owner of the house wasn't the plaintiff, these people had both nerve and entitlement.  They knew how to work the system.  I'm glad their junk was thrown out.

 

Lead Eyelashes - Drama in the projects!  Girl, if your fake eyelashes are 6 inches long and weigh a pound each so that you barely can keep your eyes open, of course your boyfriend will cheat on you  - while you blink, because blinking means your eyes are going to be shut for 3 minutes and that's all he needs.  Rashawn Morton: "she slept with my brother, TOO!"  Oh great, Lead Eyelashes has confirmation that you did cheat.  Making fun of the plaintiff's boots and stomach was really rich coming from this watermelon-shaped woman with unretractable awnings over each eye.  "They want me but they can't have me," Rashawn continued to prattle on in the hallterview using "verbal words," in case there was a handful of viewers left still not convinced that as a stud, he will pass zero intelligence to his unsupported offspring.

 

Leenoleeoooom - That was a hideous, ratty "Prada" bag that I wouldn't be caught dead with, what is it with marginal people spending $1300 to carry their food stamp card and packs of chewing gum?  I didn't like the defendant much because of the $300 discrepancy in her written vs. spoken testimony, but the landlady moaning about "Leenoleeoooom not of my taste" on her previously cement floor?  I loved how she defended this by saying this was top notch cement with a *gasp* shiny surface!  Very nice!  Feel this luxurious concrete!

 

 

[BubblingKettle]

I also didn't like the defendant in the backpack case. I wanted her to stop doing that holding your breath with your whole face squished up with a down turned mouth thing. I thought the whole family was screwed up. 

 

I also hated the mother in the medical insurance/counseling case. She is going to have one screwed up little boy. Not knocking therapy for kids but I just have an aversion to parents who seem to want their kids to be screwy. And that is the vibe I got with her. That really all her little boy needed was a stable mom and dad.

I agree -- the women in both cases seemed like real shit-starters to me.  I could envision some ugly arguments taking place in both of their relationships, and I'm sure those women weren't poor little victims amidst all of it.  Backpack Mom's face got on my nerves, too.  Once she realized that JJ was siding with her, the faces went on overdrive.  I sort of felt bad for the niece...she was such a teen, with her goofy attitude.  But I can overlook it because, bless her heart, she's at the awkward stage.  When JJ accused the niece of stealing something or having friends over, I thought the niece's shocked and appalled expression was very legit.  She may have been a bit goofy, but I didn't get a theft vibe from her.  

 

The medical bills parents were so annoying.  The father infuriated me when he started denying that his child had ADD after it had been proven that he had an Ed Psych eval, saw a physician regularly, and had a treatment plan that included medication.  I have dealt with parents who deny reality.  When the diagnosis is introduced, I often understood that the denial was their first reaction...and with understanding, help, and options, they would work towards acceptance, and support their child.  Sure, maybe the dad denied the ADD because he doesn't want to pay....but it made me think of some parents who were in denial and heaped a whole mess of shame onto their children, so IMHO he is a jerk.  Believe me, if I ever had a child in one of my classes that required a weekly trip to the school's counselor/therapist, there were some pretty serious issues there.  That poor child is probably suffering from the antics of his parents, and his dad's noncompliance with administering his meds...a recipe for disaster.

[BubblingKettle]

A Real Good Buzz... In The Eye! - I wasn't sure where this one was headed, it never goes well when you have a drunk plaintiff and a drunk defendant.  But given the hilarious description that the arresting officer made of the defendant's behavior, crying, apologizing, aggression, etc, I think even JJ started to believe that he had been capable of randomly punching the other guy in the eye. 

That case just seemed like Brokeback Mountain gone wrong.  They were buddies sharing some JD straight from the bottle, and then things took an ugly, drunken turn.  Those two seem to be from that swath of life who will spark up their friendship again, despite the fight and the court case.  I can imagine them sitting around in lawn chairs in the shed out back, taking swigs from a bottle and recanting the time they went to Judge Judy....ah good times...here's to good friends, tonight is kinda special....

[iwasish]



And if you do have insurance, don't use it: The defendant admitted multiple times that she was responsible for the accident.  She claims she was insured and paid the plaintiff some money... but then later she wanted to claim with the "insurance now?"  I think she actually didn't have insurance, got it after the fact, and probably wanted to scam the insurance and pretend the accident happened at a later date

 

Who made the evidence board in this case? Cause the direction of the angle on the parking spots, supported the plaintiff's story.  The spots were angled thusly ///// and his car was traveling  >>>>.    

[Toaster Strudel]

Who made the evidence board in this case? Cause the direction of the angle on the parking spots, supported the plaintiff's story.  The spots were angled thusly ///// and his car was traveling  >>>>.    

 

She still needs to look where she's going.

 

[27bored]

Lead Eyelashes - Drama in the projects!  Girl, if your fake eyelashes are 6 inches long and weigh a pound each so that you barely can keep your eyes open, of course your boyfriend will cheat on you  - while you blink, because blinking means your eyes are going to be shut for 3 minutes and that's all he needs.  Rashawn Morton: "she slept with my brother, TOO!"  Oh great, Lead Eyelashes has confirmation that you did cheat.  Making fun of the plaintiff's boots and stomach was really rich coming from this watermelon-shaped woman with unretractable awnings over each eye.  "They want me but they can't have me," Rashawn continued to prattle on in the hallterview using "verbal words," in case there was a handful of viewers left still not convinced that as a stud, he will pass zero intelligence to his unsupported offspring.

 

Hell. To. The. No. First of all, Lead Eyebrows had the nerve to come to court dressed like a big ass mixed-berry smoothie, with some damn flip-flops, and she's trying to shade somebody's outfit? For real? Her dumbass boyfriend "stepfather to her baby" told on himself good and quick, too. I mean, she looks like she just stopped sucking her thumb ten minutes ago, and she's still with this Angelica Pickles bullshit. By the way, what ever happened to Gopher on Winnie the Pooh? Wasn't he always blowing shit up?

 

The dude with the beard who had the hippie name RaeRene Coliflower definitely got hit...probably because he had backwash. The Defendant was a good liar, which means he's probably an alcoholic.

 

That case just seemed like Brokeback Mountain gone wrong.  They were buddies sharing some JD straight from the bottle, and then things took an ugly, drunken turn.  Those two seem to be from that swath of life who will spark up their friendship again, despite the fight and the court case.  I can imagine them sitting around in lawn chairs in the shed out back, taking swigs from a bottle and recanting the time they went to Judge Judy....ah good times...here's to good friends, tonight is kinda special....

 

Yeah, maybe they got into all them things Ennis don't know, like what Jack did in Mexico.

Edited November 14, 2014 by 27bored

[BubblingKettle]

Kaprisha's poor eyes...trapped behind the prison of those synthetic hair eyelashes.  And Keyona Durr is 30?  That is an OLD 30 right there.  

 

Making fun of the plaintiff's boots and stomach was really rich coming from this watermelon-shaped woman with unretractable awnings over each eye.  

 

And not to side with Kaprisha (because I'm not) but WTH is going on with her stomach?  The shape was unusual.  But, I will give Keyona props for having a job, as she said in the hallterview.  I wanted to hear more from witness Ricky Mosely, who needed to do a lot of lip-licking while answering JJ's one question to him.  There was untapped (unintentional) comedy sitting in that witness chair.

Rashawn...nice job using the word 'too,' buddy.  Very contemporary advice from Judge Judy, telling Rashawn to cheat in a different housing development.

 

And the next case....so they start with a Prada bag and then moved on to a knob?  And then linoleum?  I think that was just a case of a woman who doesn't know how to be a landlord and a tenant who may have been a little odd.  

[AngelaHunter]

You got to love some squatters that don't pay rent in a foreclosed home for 10 months, but get all "by the book" when the new owner shows up and is willing to let them carry on a while longer if they pay rent.

 

How does this happen? I hear about it more and more these days, with even worse cases in which the actual homeowner can't get the use of a home they purchased because squatters are...well, squatting there. Seriously? If I had squatted in someone's  home for TEN months without paying a dime, I really think I would slink out in the wee hours just thanking my lucky stars I got away with it. But not these people, who were "in the process" of moving for what? six weeks, and have unmitigated, mind-boggling gall to sue the real home owner for tossing out the crap of people who had no right to be there. Maybe they thought that because Jorge doesn'tt speak the language well that they could get away with this shit.

 

Was everyone else as grossed out as JJ was when she heard that disgusting trio traded spit in the Jack Daniel's bottle? Nothing sexier than 3 middle aged men getting pissed and then thinking they can fight. Santa Claus has a paralyzed arm, is disabled but can drive a motorized scooter? I had a stroke a few years back. My right arm was slightly paralyzed and I was forbidden by my doctor - on pain of having my license revoked - to drive any kind of vehicle until I finished physio and was certified to be fit to drive.

 

I really wanted to hear more from "RayReen Colliflower". Awesome handle.

 

And not to side with Kaprisha (because I'm not) but WTH is going on with her stomach?

 

I thought she was knocked up? I know she said she hadn't been "seeing" anyone, but that means nothing on this show, where women have no problem spreading for some one-night stand they met on Craigslist and never considering using that rare commodity, birth control.

 

Rashawn: "They want me, but they can't have me". Just a burden you need to get used to Rashawn, seing as how you got what women want! Good luck with Kaprisha. If she pulls a Lorena Bobbit on you, you can't say JJ didn't warn you, you fucking fool.

[Rick Kitchen]

Ugh, I looked up Kaprisha, and surprise, nothing about her in any news stories, I expected several more brawls to have caused cops to be called out.  But she really has a high opinion of her looks, based on her Twitter and Facebook pages.

[Brattinella]

I was dozing today, instead of paying attention.  I did notice the linoleum part, though.  Am I correct in thinking the girl was renting a room in the plaintiff's home and GLUED linoleum on the floor?  If so, JJ was very wrong to not reimburse plaintiff for that.

[QuelleC]

It's probably the stick down tile.  You have to know how to orient them and minimize the joints and score around the edges of the floor moulding.  I put some in my kitchen and it was about $250 which was a lot of money for me 5 years ago, and still looks a lot better than the yellow 70's floor that wouldn't get clean.  A vast improvement on concrete, I think.  My only concern is the picture looked like a scuff from an appliance or something. 

[WhoaWhoKnew]

She was talking about finished concrete which can be very nice looking as flooring especially when it's colored.

I would definitely want money if someone put down different floors without asking me, whether it's new or not. JJ definitely dropped the ball on that one.

[AngelaHunter]

Am I correct in thinking the girl was renting a room in the plaintiff's home and GLUED linoleum on the floor?

 

Apparently, but I find the whole thing odd. I'm pretty darned sure I would notice if someone came into my house carrying boxes of tiles or a roll of linoooooleum and spent the day working on it.

 

If I were the hall, I'd say "Don't rent out rooms in your home to strangers."

[teebax]

My parents rented a house several years ago that went into foreclosure. The representative from the bank actually told them not to pay rent to the landlord because the landlord wasn't paying it to the bank and to wait until the bank told them how much to pay, where to send it, and when to pay. Upon my advice, they were putting their rent into a separate bank account, just in case the situation changed and they were ordered to repay back rent. Well, they never were, and that was three years ago.

They lived there for over a year rent-free because no one told them to pay rent or whom to pay it to. My mom would call the bank every few weeks because she was certain that at some point she'd need to pay all that money back. She was always told that they were working on it and would get back to her. Foreclosures on rental properties can be very strange for a tenant, but even diligent ones sometimes end up living for free.

The difference between my folks and these two idiots is that when the house was finally sold, my parents moved out when asked to do so by the new owner. They knew eventually they'd have to, unless the new owner wanted to continue renting out the house, so they were prepared to move and did so with no drama, police involvement, or court orders. It also bothered them that they weren't paying rent. Ironically, that house had a concrete floor in the master bedroom, and is was gorgeous, and nice and cool, which is great for Arizona weather.

I think if JJ could put herself in the concrete floor landlord's shoes she wouldn't have been so dismissive. I'd be really ticked off if a renter decided to change my flooring without consulting me and getting permission.

[Toaster Strudel]

So there is such a thing as "luxurious concrete" LOL, you learn something everyday!

[AZChristian]

Yep - if you google "concrete floors," I think you'll be amazed. 

[Intocats]

She was talking about finished concrete which can be very nice looking as flooring especially when it's colored.

I would definitely want money if someone put down different floors without asking me, whether it's new or not. JJ definitely dropped the ball on that one.

Yes! I almost threw my pillow at the screen when JJ told the plaintiff, "You're not getting paid for the linoleum!" Sometimes Judy is so focused on what she is going to say next that she doesn't listen.

 

I missed the RaeRene Cauliflower episode! It was pre-empted in my area for some college football show. Usually they will show JJ at 2 a.m. when there is a pre-emption, but didn't happen this time. Boo!

[AngelaHunter]

When was the last time we saw a landlord who actually had an inkling of tenant/landlord laws and had a ligitimate lease agreement that was signed (!) with nothing whited out and written over and  spelled out conditions, like maybe

 

" Tenants may make certain changes to the residence with written approval and must agree to return the dwelling to it's former condition before vacating the premises. Failure to do so will result in the loss of part or all of the deposit"?

 

Any time JJ mentions the laws pertaining to rental properties, the landlords always have a "Duh, I didn't know that!" face and admit having no clue what those laws might be. So tuff for them.

 

I missed the RaeRene Cauliflower episode!

 

Aww, too bad but you really didn't miss all that much. Just play the Irish Rovers' "Wasn't that a Party" and you'll get the picture of this stupid debacle.

[Ouisch]

JJ's obvious distaste at three men sipping out of the same Jack Daniels bottle amused me. Heck, the alcohol in that stuff will kill the larger germs, and after a few sips you stop worrying about infections. (Side note: I know self-described "germophobic" people who hover over public toilet seats and open the public restroom door with a paper towel in hand who don't think twice about lying on the bedspread/comforter in a hotel room [they only launder those things once per year] or setting their purse at their feet on a restaurant floor and then placing that same purse on their kitchen table. I'm sure JJ has unwittingly engaged in far more germy behavior than these JD-swilling gents.) And RaeRene Colliflower's first name sounds like Scooby-Doo trying to pronounce "Layleen" or some similar name.

[Sile]

Apparently, but I find the whole thing odd. I'm pretty darned sure I would notice if someone came into my house carrying boxes of tiles or a roll of linoooooleum and spent the day working on it.

 

 

 

When JJ was asking the plaintiff about when the defendant put it down, plaintiff starting babbling about how she was okay with it but that the defendant had promised to remove it when she left, which apparently wasn't stated in the Four Corners of the Contract because as soon as she started with the "but she promised" part of her story, JJ shut her down.

 

It's been a few years since the glorious results of my misspent youth, but they were arguing on whether it was Jack Daniels or bourbon.  Isn't Jack Daniels Tennessee Bourbon?  It's like one of those "all bourbon is whiskey, but all whiskey isn't bourbon" type things.

 

Maybe I'm getting Jack confused with Jim, I dated both of them at one point...

 

Edited because I just happened to remember that Lynchburg isn't in Kentucky.

Edited November 16, 2014 by Sile

[iwasish]

She still needs to look where she's going.

If she produced the evidence board it didn't support HER version of events. She accused him of going the wrong way, the diagram shows he wasn't. Of course she was obligated to look both ways, I just thought it was strange that her own evidence proved she was wrong.

[Ouisch]

Mr. Ouisch's main comment during the Lineoleum-Hating Landlord case: "Did you just see that landlord pull her slacks out of her ass crack right on TV?!"

[teebax]

Mr. Ouisch's main comment during the Lineoleum-Hating Landlord case: "Did you just see that landlord pull her slacks out of her ass crack right on TV?!"

I'm sure glad I missed that.

[ItsHelloPattiagain]

 

Lead Eyelashes - Drama in the projects!  Girl, if your fake eyelashes are 6 inches long and weigh a pound each so that you barely can keep your eyes open, of course your boyfriend will cheat on you  - while you blink, because blinking means your eyes are going to be shut for 3 minutes and that's all he needs.

IMHO the problem with her big ass lead eyelashes is that it accentuated her wonky eye. Who wants to emphasize a wonky eye? 

 

And gosh wasn't she lucky? She won the cheater! She gets to keep the cheater that cheated on her with a reprehensible looking woman with a slinky ass swap meet wig on.  I cannot imagine a culture where keeping a man is so important the he gets to be a total ass (particularly in the hallterview) and Wonky Eye feels like she won the man lottery. 

[AngelaHunter]

I cannot imagine a culture where keeping a man is so important the he gets to be a total ass (particularly in the hallterview) and Wonky Eye feels like she won the man lottery.

 

This behavior is par for the course on this show. although to me it's so alien that I may as well be watching Martians. How many times have we seen two women, not just having "verbal words" but duking it out on the street in a Battle Supreme, with fists, 2 x 4s or anything else at hand over a man so worthless that he's usually in jail by the time an actual winner (congratulations!) is declared.

[27bored]

The problem with Lead Eyebrows is that she has her priorities fucked up. It's fine if you wanna wear falsies if you think they make you look pretty, but when you're a big girl and you're dressed like a gigantic baby bottle pop, do we care that you look like Lil Miss Springfield up about the eyelashes? No. No we don't.

[AngelaHunter]

JJ's obvious distaste at three men sipping out of the same Jack Daniels bottle amused me.

 

It's funny, but that's one thing that I really have a problem with. Even as a kid, I never wanted to let any of my friends drink from whatever bottle I had (Coke or whatever), taste my food using MY fork or lick my ice cream cone. Just the thought of someone else's saliva on my food or drink disgusted me and it still does. If a friend insisted on a lick of my ice cream, I'd continue eating all around it and when I got to the part that was licked, I'd throw the rest away.

 

So yeah, I'm with JJ on this one, big time!

[Sarcastico]

 

I haven't seen Sarcastico around in awhile (wherever you are, I still love you!) but stuff like this makes me not miss him quite as much.

 

I'm still here and keeping up, hon!

 

 

JJ's obvious distaste at three men sipping out of the same Jack Daniels bottle amused me. Heck, the alcohol in that stuff will kill the larger germs, and after a few sips you stop worrying about infections.

 

Heck, I once killed a sore throat/head cold with one swig from the JD bottle.

Edited November 17, 2014 by Sarcastico

[teebax]

It's funny, but that's one thing that I really have a problem with. Even as a kid, I never wanted to let any of my friends drink from whatever bottle I had (Coke or whatever), taste my food using MY fork or lick my ice cream cone. Just the thought of someone else's saliva on my food or drink disgusted me and it still does. If a friend insisted on a lick of my ice cream, I'd continue eating all around it and when I got to the part that was licked, I'd throw the rest away.

 

So yeah, I'm with JJ on this one, big time!

I once caught my now ex using my toothbrush. The occasional nip from my bottle or taking a bite of my food was annoying, but the toothbrush thing sent me over the edge. Did I mention that she's now my ex?

[Toaster Strudel]

Burglar Boutique - Pawn shop owner was done and finished when he admitted that he did not volunteer information to the cops about all the other junk his client was "finding in storage units."  But the cops only came for this one specific case!  Judgment for the plaintiff...

 

Vocal Fry Video - I wanted to see the bad video.  The plaintiff looked like he might play the banjo.  But who cares... the best/worst thing about the case was the witness' vocal fry.  I swear it's the worst I've ever heard.

 

"HAHAHAHAHA" - Are these two drunks kidding me?  I don't think I've ever seen JJ laugh so hard, she was in a splendid mood. The case must have been filmed after lunch on sushi tuesday.

 

Terresa Terry, Insurance Scammer - teebax will love this.  If you're going to need someone to lie to the insurance company, you have to give them a cut!  Even JJ agrees and granted the cut to the plaintiff.  What, no talk of clean hands?  Doesn't matter!  I felt sorry for the kid, but he did get $5K for a pile of blankets and a few laundry baskets of clothes.

 

Even The Lord Is Uninsured! - Pasty faced Mary Magdalen defendant crashes Jesus' motorcycle.  Our Savior had forgotten to insure his bike with the Holy Ghost.  Too bad!  The sinner woman was lying when she said Jesus rode with her, in the hallterview she admitted that he didn't.  She betrayed him in front of Pilatus Judy!

[Zahdii]

I can't remember, what is a vocal fry?

 

I'm still trying to reconcile myself to people who have no use for capital letters and spelling is optional.  (u = you, 2 = to, two, too, prolly = probably, pwond = owned, etc.)

[BubblingKettle]

I'm betting the band in the first case would hurt my ears.  Miranda's voice....  {sing songy} "Ownly wunnnn uhvv the baaaannnnnd boyyzzz."  Her singing voice must sound like a bored feral cat.  I, too, would love to see the band's video.

 

In the second case, there were some obvious embellishments to the truth:

1. The group had actually chosen a designated driver. (sorry, NO)

2. "I only had one drink." (Was it in a gallon jug?)

3. "I didn't blow a .08....well, the first time I went to court.....uh, yeah, it was .08."  (Huh?)

I did enjoy JJ's laugh at the drunk kid and his friend, and Byrd gave what I call 'a Grey Poupon face.'  

 

Second episode, first case -- As I was suffering through Albert Thompson's lousy grammar (had went, yes they was, had spoke), I was surprised to find out that the young man had a valid complaint.  Terresa Terry's Chesire Cat grin totally gave away that she did pull a fast one with the insurance company.  Then, she appeared to be sweating.  Judge Judy gave her an opportunity to fess up, but she was determined to stick to her story.  I think Albert made out fat on the ruling, though.  It looked like he had the typical collection of early 20's shit (clothes, cheap mattress....let's not forget his sandals), so $5,000 was a nice windfall for him.  Slightly off-topic for this case: WTH was up with the lady in the galley with the white hair and blue scarf?  She was a couple of rows behind Albert.  At one point, she was doing some sort of neck stretches -- I don't know what she was doing, but she was weird.  

 

I wonder if Motorcycle Owner carries a comb in his back pocket.  His long mane was perfectly parted down the middle, and he had no flyaways.  

 

Also, I love that JJ always mentions Karnak, and it cracks me up because the people are either too young or they are English as a Second Language, and they have no clue.  

[BubblingKettle]

I can't remember, what is a vocal fry?

 

I'm still trying to reconcile myself to people who have no use for capital letters and spelling is optional.  (u = you, 2 = to, two, too, prolly = probably, pwond = owned, etc.)

Vocal fry is a speech disorder in which a person continues speaking on the ends of expressed air.  It sounds gravelly or creaky (but not necessarily deep).  Unfortunately, some high school and college aged girls consider it to be trendy.  Not only does it increase the chances of problems with vocal cords, it also has been found to have negative implications when they enter the workforce.  Plus, it's just annoying!

[Zahdii]

I don't know who Karnak is, either.  They Karnak Temple complex in Egypt?  The comic book marital artist?

 

Oh, the Johnny Carson skit?  They were pretty funny.

[AngelaHunter]

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HAHAHAHAHA" - Are these two drunks kidding me?  I don't think I've ever seen JJ laugh so hard, she was in a splendid mood.

 

Yeah, it was funny listening to these fucking fools, but I detest drunk drivers. If it were up to me, those two would be jail making license plates and not on national television.

 

Quote

As I was suffering through Albert Thompson's lousy grammar (had went, yes they was, had spoke), I was surprised to find out that the young man had a valid complaint.

 

Yes! Tiny little Albert and his mangled English "was" very annoying, but then we had  A Twist! Turns out his smirking bull-like aunty likes to practice insurance fraud so I was glad l'il Al won. I do SO wish someone would blow the whistle on Aunty.

 

The equally tiny Mr. Lillie disagreed with JJ's ruling and felt he needn't pay for services rendered if said services are not up to his personal standards. Piss off, Lillie. Pay the piper. Oh, and take those plugs out of your ears. They make you look even more foolish, you little freak.

 

QuotePasty faced Mary Magdalen defendant crashes Jesus' motorcycle.

 

Hahaha!!

 

Quote

I'm still here and keeping up, hon!

 

Sarcastico! So glad you're still here, darlin'!

Edited November 17, 2014 by AngelaHunter