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All Episodes Talk: All Rise


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I missed Judge Judy, too. I think this was the first time in years that it wasn't preempted for something trivial like blizzards or tornados that had no chance of hitting my area. Glued to the TV, I had eye surgery the day before. I can't get my eye wet for a week. So very, very hard to do. I'm sure this post is off topic. I came here to see if someone was in a different time zone and watched it. And to pay my respects. Edited due to damned autocorrect.

Edited by marleyfan
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I did have the misfortune to see the green and grey dreadlocks.  Those two looked like characters from Scooby Doo.

 

My mom wasn't a hitter, but she would have punched that nasty smirk right off that woman's face.  Made me wonder if JJ noticed it.  She would have had her removed from the courtroom.

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My mom wasn't a hitter, but she would have punched that nasty smirk right off that woman's face.  Made me wonder if JJ noticed it.  She would have had her removed from the courtroom.

 

I was truly flabbergasted at the arrogance of that woman's bald contempt for the Judge and the Courtroom.  What a troll!  Seriously, who would DO THAT??  If I had made that face at ANY of the adults in my life, I would have been knocked into the middle of next week.

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I am a substitute teacher and have seen many a teenage bitchface in high schools and middle schools. I LOVED that JJ mocked her facial bitchitude. I told my boyfriend that i would love to do that in school, but can't because I am the adult. Actually, watching JJ is my vicarious relief to deal with all the entitled special snowflakes in school.

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My mom was a US Customs inspector- she had flyers on how to spot counterfeits.  Back when I was in high school Louis Vuitton handbags had just become *super* popular, and I was amused to see how many of the more stuck-up girls had fakes. One big tell, at least back then, was that the real bags would never cut the pieces in a way that would cut off any of the LV logos.

Another big tell is the stiffness and color of the leather on the straps. If you see somebody with really light colored leather on the straps it means the purse is either brand spanking (like right out of the bag five minutes ago) new or a big old fake. Those leather straps oxidize the minute you start using the purse. Another is that the sizes of the purse are not something that LV would put out. 

 

 

I was glad not to have smell-a-vision. Both of them looked like they stank. I'm not surprised they lived in total filth.

I was thinking of part of the Grinch song. . . "STINK - STANK - STUNK!!!!"

 

Taco Bride and her hubbie did give off a weirdness vibe. Then I started thinking who invites people to their reception and serves tacos and mimosas? Like drive through Taco bell and get a bunch of those Big Crunch Munch boxes of tacos (like 12 tacos for $5, used to get them when my kids were small) and some OJ and bubbly and you got a reception. Oh, don't forget those old dead ass flowers you snatched out of somebody's lawn. It's supposed to sounds all modern and kitschy trendy but when I write it down it sounds cheap as hell. 

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Ep. 1, Case 1

Defendant Mr. Brodman gave off a ne'er-do-well vibe, and plaintiff Miss Allen was dead behind the eyes. Miss Allen and the landlady claimed Brodman screwed them out of money and did damage to the rental. Mr. Brodman tried to present himself as the injured party and spewed his memorized soundbites of woe. The landlady loudly squawked throughout the case, and I don't know why Judge Judy didn't tell her to calm the hell down and lower her voice.

 

Ep. 2, Case 1

Two Muppets came to life, escaped the Imaginarium, and were chosen to dispute their case on this episode of Judge Judy. Crystal Stegelman, the defendant, stole money off a dead guy and was mad that the plaintiff, William Madden, spread the word. So, Crystal and her pal Junior (who she was pretending not to remember) went over to Big Bill's to beat him with the dead guy's bat.  JJ (and the rest of us) are grossed out that Crystal has children. Homeowner Dave Dipman seemed like a nice-enough guy, possibly touched by a stroke or TBI (bless him) - I was wishing he didn't get mixed up with these messy folks. Dave - get new friends.

 

Ep. 2, Case 2

Plaintiff Tony McIntosh was suing for a $1500 loan given to defendant, Jane Andaya, who had fascinating hair color. Boo hoo, I'm a single mother and all of that. She pissed off Judge Judy by lying to her, giving her a story in court that didn't match her Lifetime romance movie-inspired sworn account (on paper) of how Mr. McIntosh gave her a special delivery along with the money. (That sounds dirty, but it wasn't.) JJ told Ms. Andaya that her kid will know she's a bullshitter someday.

 

The preview for tomorrow's first episode was gruesome (not watching it), but the preview for the second episode looked pretty good....a grill-wearing guy who believes all the ladies want him. I'm in for that one.

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Just watched that one (skinny drunk gal & Barney).  All 3 were....damn....I have no words.  If you're coming to court....ya know (just a thought here)...come straight FGS.

 

Lady with the windows was a piece of work.  I would never rent from her.

 

ETA:  When she said she went from all electric to gas I said WTF?  When we built our house in '99 we went all electric and geothermal.....costs more going in but it pays for itself in 4-5 yrs.  Our whole bill for lights, heat, hot water tank, etc is $120 a month (2400 sq ft) winter & summer (central air, too)  I hate gas heat.  Have almost been blown up with a gas leak at my old shop and CM'd at our old house (thank God for the CM detector my SIL gave everybody one Christmas).  I have never heard of those kind of windows either.

Edited by OhioSongbird
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Can someone explain to me why the hell anyone would want a “carbon monoxide window?”  I assume that you keep it open a little all the time?? But that would allow cold air to get in and is not energy efficient at all.  Plus, if there is carbon monoxide in the room, you are still going to breathe some of it in.
I think JJ was as  confused as I was.
I have gas heat, normal windows and carbon monoxide detectors on every floor.
I missed most of the episode but got the part about the door, window and the arrests. I love how the one plaintiff tried to make it the ex-boyfriend’s fault that she got arrested for drugs. I highly doubt it was a call from him that caused a raid.  .  It’s difficult to get a warrant just on the word of an ex; if he did call, they raided her because there were other reasons.

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Can someone explain to me why the hell anyone would want a “carbon monoxide window?”

 

Is there actually such a thing? I have windows with those plastic tabs on them too. As far as I know they're supposed to function as a deterrent, so you can leave your windows open a bit -- more like 3" than the 1" she was talking about -- for fresh air but someone trying to break in would make noise breaking them (it wouldn't actually stop the perp because those tabs are super easy to break) and at least you'd get a warning you were under siege -- and they'd know they'd made noise. Methinks the window guy saw a nervous lady who'd just switched to gas heat, pitched them as "super special carbon monoxide windows" and charged her a bundle extra.

Edited by designing1
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Two Muppets came to life, escaped the Imaginarium, and were chosen to dispute their case on this episode of Judge Judy.

 

Perfect description, especially for Crystal.  Remember the Muppets when they were on Saturday Night Live, in the early years -- the Mighty Favod and his crone of a wife?  If Crystal was Muppetized, she'd be the wife. 

 

Loved JJ:  "She has children?!?!" 

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Anyone wanna guess what Crystal Stegelman does for a living?

Ha ha ha! Just kidding. She's a stripper. Like we needed a fact check on that one.

I did like when Bill, the Plaintiff, said she was yelling "cursive" words at him. She MUST have meant business since she didn't use more polite printed words.

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I missed most of the jabbering, drooling meth-monster of a Crystal Stegelman, dammit! She stole money off a dead guy?  And then tried to beat up the good guy for telling people about her?  WOW!  I'm just surprised she can stand upright on her own.

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And then tried to beat up the good guy for telling people about her?

AND! In her hallterview she said she wasn't arrested for the assault because "he got what he deserved." Trash.

I just finished watching the case of The Overinvested, Shrieky Landlord and Google'd "carbon monoxide windows" because, like the rest of you, had no idea there WERE such things and, as of yet, have been unable to find these magical windows.

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Anyone wanna guess what Crystal Stegelman does for a living?

Ha ha ha! Just kidding. She's a stripper. Like we needed a fact check on that one.

Jeezus, I may have just cured myself of the morbid curiosity that makes me look up JJ's litigants on Facebook.  Her FB page, and the FB of her "employer" are not for the faint of heart.

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I just finished watching the case of The Overinvested, Shrieky Landlord and Google'd "carbon monoxide windows" because, like the rest of you, had no idea there WERE such things and, as of yet, have been unable to find these magical windows.

 

Me neither.  I wonder if Ms. Micklen (sp?) was sold a bill of goods when the windows were installed.  But I couldn't even find a shady company promising windows that vent carbon monoxide.  But lots of sites saying that even open windows might not prevent carbon monoxide poisoning. 

 

Double and triple-pane windows do have a gas between the panes though.  Maybe she was just confused.  Loud and confused.

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Jeezus, I may have just cured myself of the morbid curiosity that makes me look up JJ's litigants on Facebook.  Her FB page, and the FB of her "employer" are not for the faint of heart.

 

What is it about bikers -- especially female bikers -- that makes them load their FB pages with shit about riding a bike?  It might have been unusual in the 1950's, but so were women wearing jeans.  You don't see me posting pictures of myself in my Bluebell Wranglers.

 

I saw not one photo of her kids.  Probably at their request.

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Anyone wanna guess what Crystal Stegelman does for a living?

Ha ha ha! Just kidding. She's a stripper.

 

That would be one sad-assed, low-rent strip joint. She reminded me of Shelly Duval's  "Olive Oyl", that is if Olive Oyl had been a violent, brain-dead schmoo who clears up rumours with a baseball bat. According to the show, she's a bartender. Better not stiff her on a tip. I'm pretty sure there's another bat behind the bar.

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Thanks, Giantmisfit, for my first grammar guffaw of the day......subtle and hilarious. Reminds me of the time a student asked me to print my words on the board cuz he could not read cursive. .....these days that's typical, sigh . I strip continue to use "cursive" words at home when faced with mutants on JJ.

Not strip, I meant that I still use.......I must have been trying to vigorously wipe the image of Ms Stegelman's occupation from my brain.

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I did like when Bill, the Plaintiff, said she was yelling "cursive" words at him. She MUST have meant business since she didn't use more polite printed words.

 

I wondered if the cursive was Palmer or Zaner-Bloser......

 

Anyhow, I'm convinced that if you name your child Crystal (or any variation thereof), stripping is the profession she will most likely have.

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Unless she's working in one of those mutant strip places, as seen in "Total Recall" I guarantee the patrons would not only be yelling, "Put it on!" but would no doubt use a variety of cursive words too.

 

Landlady with the carbon monoxide windows had a voice that made me want to rip my ears off and her drugged-out tenant had a new boyfriend who, although they had a similiar appearance at first glance, made the former look like a real catch.

 

ETA: Who loved JJ's shocked and horrified, "SHE has kids??" when informed of Crystal's motherhood status?

Edited by AngelaHunter
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Landlady with the carbon monoxide windows had a voice that made me want to rip my ears off and her drugged-out tenant had a new boyfriend who, although they had a similar appearance at first glance, made the former look like a real catch.

 

 

Oh, me too! Every time the landlady opened her mouth it was like nails on a chalkboard - and she continued to screech on when JJ was leaving...OY!!!

 

Has anyone seen Googly Eyes this season? Or has she moved on to a new gig?

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ETA: Who loved JJ's shocked and horrified, "SHE has kids??" when informed of Crystal's motherhood status?

But doesn't nearly every single miscreant who appears in her court have kids? I can't see why JJ would be so shocked about this girl's ability to breed.

 

Has anyone seen Googly Eyes this season? Or has she moved on to a new gig?

I think she's been replaced by that chick with the never-ending supply of eyeglasses. I mean, seriously? Is that woman in the gallery being sponsored by some guerilla marketing by LensCrafters?

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I can't see why JJ would be so shocked about this girl's ability to breed.

 

Maybe because her, "Yeah, I hit him with the bat. He was bleeding." *shrug* violence was so casual and matter-of-fact, as though attacking someone with a baseball bat over a rumour is how disputes are settled in her world. Also, she seemed either drugged or brain-damaged.

 

Yeah, as JJ said, "Guppies have babies." Even they're more fit for parenthood than Crystal, and they eat their young.

 

I Love You AngelaHunter!

 

Back at ya! Hee!

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Maybe because her, "Yeah, I hit him with the bat. He was bleeding." *shrug* violence was so casual and matter-of-fact, as though attacking someone with a baseball bat over a rumour is how disputes are settled in her world. Also, she seemed either drugged or brain-damaged.

 

 

Lest we forget, she said when she went to the home, she didn't know that she would use the bat, which was coincidentally left in the hallway near the plaintiff's room.

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Unless she's working in one of those mutant strip places, as seen in "Total Recall" I guarantee the patrons would not only be yelling, "Put it on!" but would no doubt use a variety of cursive words too.

 

ETA: Who loved JJ's shocked and horrified, "SHE has kids??" when informed of Crystal's motherhood status?

 

When y'all said she was a stripper I immediately thought "must be DAY SHIFT stripper." Ugh. The FB page for her workplace is pretty gross, though. Not to be an asshole, but there must be some slim pickins in Casper, WY, stripper-wise. And of course she has kids. Of course. And of course they are teenagers, since she is probably in her early 30s herself, tops.

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I skipped today's first episode and chose to get some laughs with King of Queens instead of a morose story of an animal's demise on JJ. But the second episode's first case had it all:

  • A desperate woman who gave a deadbeat loser she "met" on Facebook 80% of her money
  • A pretend relative ("dad" but not really dad)
  • A pretend football jersey with gold metallic embellishment
  • A guy who has an inflated opinion of himself
  • Hair color experimentation
  • A disgusting grill
  • Giant fake eyelashes
  • JJ warning a litigant, "This isn't an audition. And I already have the job."
  • JJ using street slang
  • Unemployment for bullshit reasons
  • A sister who's a stripper
  • A cellphone in a sewer
  • JJ calling the young woman a "bum magnet"
  • The deadbeat loser making a hallterview vow to continue having fun in life
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Two cases in a row of people who will not STFU. The lady who got her dog killed was a real piece of work. Like JJ said, why didn't she grab the dog and get him out of harm's way? She just let him get run over by a car. And the way she described it, the dog wasn't even right next to her, and therefore was really out of her control, not just off-leash but off by itself. The defendant was a total moron. I cannot believe he even bothered to hire a lawyer if he was just going to act like that in the courtroom. And I can't believe his lawyer didn't basically steamroll the guy to get him to shut up and stop ruining his own case.

 

The parking lot women were both stupid. Neither one was paying even a tiny bit of attention because BOTH of them would have stopped if they had. My guess is they were both on their cell phones/texting.

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"Everyone thinks I'm a fake Facebook page." - Tristen Bradford, Judge Judy 11/17/15

 

Other things possibly thought by Tristen Bradford:

 

"Everyone thinks I'm a dining room table with a face."

"Sometimes toilet paper disappears in the dishwasher."

"Shoe boxes sometimes show up on my head."

 

Will not be watching the dog death case. Thanks for the heads up, people!

 

ETA: I could not find the Facebook page that looks like Tristen Bradford.

Edited by Guest
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They goofball who brought the lawyer - the lawyer was almost as big an idiot. JJ has "basically" already declared she's dismissing the plaintiff's case, but the lawyer gets up and starts rambling. She cuts him off, and he STILL keeps on jabbering. Hey!  You're winning!  Shut up!  Guess he had to say something to justify whatever "fee" he's collecting on this one. My guess is the def. was guilty of SOMETHING, so he brought the lawyer.

 

No words for Mr. Bradford. Glad his 15 minutes are over!

 

Stupid parking lot women? I'd bet my eye teeth that the plaintiff did NOT have insurance. Another case of "I have this paper."  Uh huh. Glad Judy said they were equally responsible, because they were. I am amazed every day by the number of people who go zooming down the rows in parking lots. I really do creep when I back out - my son always complains since we have a backup camera.  Doesn't matter.  Idiots abound.

 

Finally saw the muppets case from yesterday - Wow. Another one where you hope CPS was watching.

 

Catching up on weekend eps -  some case of more idiot driver defendants  who cross 3 lanes of traffic to get gas, and claim they were hit, and did not crash into the plaintiff.  Well, I guess the plaintiff must have some sort of nifty new "Back to the Future"-type car that moves sideways(!), since his car was hit on the drivers' side. Pretty cool trick to hit someone with the side of your car, huh?!  Plaintiff wins, idiot defs. $5000 counter claim dismissed.  Surprise!

 

Side note: I could tell the car crash ep was a late night weekend one.  "Feeling lonely?" ads instead of "We sue truck drivers!"  ads.

Edited by SandyToes
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Stupid parking lot women? I'd bet my eye teeth that the plaintiff did NOT have insurance. Another case of "I have this paper."

 

Her paper included a statement that there was no lapse in coverage during that time period.  She must have seen JJ's shows and knew that a simple insurance card wouldn't get her off the hook.  What did she say about the damage?  Over $6K, for a car that books at $7K?  Damn.

 

In the dog case, I think the loudmouth had his mouthpiece there because of something the dog lady said about him lying to the police.  She started to quote the law about giving false statements. 

 

I felt bad for her dog.

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Damn, less than 24 hours after swearing off FB stalking litigants, I went searching for Tristen Bradford, who fancies himself quite the specimen.....

Oh god, I actually popped out there and read his post about his appearance....I despair for the future of the human race....

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