S03.E07: Fat Jokes

[Snarklepuss]

10 hours ago, princelina said:

Yes - the participation trophies bit is the part that everyone knows about.  But the hidden backside to that is the fact that since we are all aware that "self-esteem" is the be-all and end-all, people are unable to be honest about things, even with good friends (or employees) who may need to hear certain uncomfortable truths.  I'm not talking about demeaning or name-calling, but IMO, due to the self-esteem movement, people are very afraid of doing just that so they either say nothing or lie to maintain the false level of self-esteem in the person who could benefit from some good old honesty.

I might agree with you more about how this holds true for Whitney if it weren't for the fact that I am sure Buddy in particular doesn't pull any punches with her.  When we can see him on camera telling her to go "bleep" herself, I doubt there's much he wouldn't confront her with if he really wanted to.  I get the feeling that Buddy has said his piece before, but Whitney is all too good at dismissing what people close to her say and he has given up with her.  Same might be true for some of her other friends too.  She has a convenient excuse or defensive answer for everything and when that doesn't work, there's always the tears.   Earlier this season that whole "mock funeral" her friends staged to try to get through to her didn't do any good.  Her own trainer hasn't been able to get through despite confrontation.  What more can they realistically do?  In her case I think the confrontation is only having the effect of making her go more into denial and defensiveness.  At this point I think she's going to have to hit rock bottom in some way before she wakes up.

That said, I think the root cause of her difficulty accepting such confrontation honestly stems from her parents, who have not been good at saying "no" to her.  Despite what Babs said about Glen being guilty of this, I don't think she has been much better.  I think they have been too easy on her for a long time, and they've already created a monster in her and it's too late even if they were to start being tougher on her now.

Edited July 24, 2016 by Snarklepuss

[Nowhere]

26 minutes ago, LocalGovt said:

'Cause if they stop doing those things for her, poof! There goes the show and the TLC Gravy Train....for ALL  of them drawing a paycheck from it.

Well, yeah. Money is always more important than a person's life. 

[OnceSane]

This thread is for discussing what occurred in this episode only.  Take all other conversations to the appropriate thread.

[LocalGovt]

1 hour ago, Nowhere said:

Well, yeah. Money is always more important than a person's life. 

Well, to most folks, I agree, a life would be more important. But money makes people do funny things.

[DNR]

Imo, the comedienne did drop some legit truth bombs on Twit . Twit is in total denial as far as I can see and would never consider that she's unhealthy , unhappy etc . She really is surrounded by enablers . I cannot wait for her trainer to dump her next episode . Cue waterworks ?????

[Stripper Glitter]

On 7/21/2016 at 10:21 AM, Toaster Strudel said:

Is this what you guys mean by "zoning out" while eating?

Agh!! Counting across, numbers 3 and 10 - zoinks. She does look like she's having the, ahem, time of her life. My eyes.

[Stripper Glitter]

Double post

Edited July 25, 2016 by Stripper Glitter
Double post

[Stripper Glitter]

On 7/21/2016 at 6:15 PM, Nowhere said:

Obviously she's no better considering she immediately called the woman a "skinny bitch" (ok she's a bitch but what does skinny have to do with it?)

By that same token - Years ago a friend and I went to see "Misery". At the part where Kathy Bates breaks James Caan's ankles, a woman behind me gasped: "That fat bitch!" I wanted to turn around in my seat and ask her what being fat had to do with her actions. Instead, with shame I sunk lower in my seat and felt my cheeks flush, because I'm fat too. 

So,  it goes both ways.

[Aw my lahgs]

On 20 de julio de 2016 at 7:34 AM, LocalGovt said:

You know, I really think we in America (and perhaps other countries as well, too) have absolutely no idea of what "morbidly obese" means.  I found this: 

Morbid obesity is a medical term describing people who have a Body Mass Index (BMI) of 40, or of 35 to 40 with significant medical problems caused by or made worse by their weight. BMI of 40 amounts to approximately 100 pounds above ideal weight.https://www.google.com/search?q=morbidly+obese+definition&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8

So, a person whose ideal body weight is 130 would be considered morbidly obese at 230.  That's a lot of America.

So true! But Whitney, already morbidly obese, isn't doing large people any favors with her less than stellar personal attributes. 

At 5"1 and 380 lbs, Witney's BMI is 71.8. Way beyond the >40 morbid obesity classifier... And I'm thinking she weighs more than 380 (she sure looks like it), which makes her BMI even higher. She's beyond super morbidly obese. She's Dr Now material.

[Guest]

14 hours ago, Stripper Glitter said:

By that same token - Years ago a friend and I went to see "Misery". At the part where Kathy Bates breaks James Caan's ankles, a woman behind me gasped: "That fat bitch!" I wanted to turn around in my seat and ask her what being fat had to do with her actions. Instead, with shame I sunk lower in my seat and felt my cheeks flush, because I'm fat too. 

So,  it goes both ways.

Not sure if this will help with the discussion StripperGlitter (love that name - maybe I should change mine to StripperPsychoKlown) but in an article I read a psychiatrist claims that we use adjectives like fat, skinny, big nose, etc. when we're at an emotional level above normal because it's what we see and the relationship immediately fixates on something that is visual that triggers a response in your mind.  She said it was usually visual - sometimes we'll use other adjectives that are purely judgmental (stupid, moron, idiot, etc.) because those are the trigger words that come to the forefront of our minds in anger or frustration.

I suppose it's food for thought.

[Gaily]

2 hours ago, PsychoKlown said:

Not sure if this will help with the discussion StripperGlitter (love that name - maybe I should change mine to StripperPsychoKlown) but in an article I read a psychiatrist claims that we use adjectives like fat, skinny, big nose, etc. when we're at an emotional level above normal because it's what we see and the relationship immediately fixates on something that is visual that triggers a response in your mind.  She said it was usually visual - sometimes we'll use other adjectives that are purely judgmental (stupid, moron, idiot, etc.) because those are the trigger words that come to the forefront of our minds in anger or frustration.

I totally agree with you PsychoKlown. It does not make that behavior right but that is excellent insight into why people behave that way. I do the same thing when I am alone and yelling to bad drivers in awful traffic (they can't hear me and my rants are super short -- of course, that's no excuse. It does not happen that often).

Sorry but I still feel really badly for Whitney. The cake tasting scene was very hard to watch -- they should not have filmed her stuffing her face with cake and then acting delusional ("I don't even like cake," she says as she chows on key lime cake, banana pudding layers, red velvet cake and white cake/white frosting in giant gulps).  The cameras showed her chewing food with her mouth open and eating big bites in rapid fire succession which is truly every fat person's worst nightmare along with trying on bathing suits and stepping on the scale.

And sorry again but isn't there anyone in her orbit who will help her and fight for her?  Jesus!  I like her parents, Hunter and Buddy but can't one of them say "hey, let us help you. Lets get you a therapist.  You don't have to live this way" in a kind, helpful way that is not at all shame based?  Whitney deserves a better life -- I don't want her to die.  Fine to be fat and fabulous as long as you are not on your way to an early grave.  Sorry but I care about Whitney and want better for her.

Edited July 26, 2016 by Gaily

[grayson]

Gaily writes,

Quote

Sorry but I care about Whitney and want better for her.

Thank you your ongoing compassion for Whitney. She seems to be in physical, emotional, and mental distress that is uncomfortable to observe. I also feel bad for her.

[MelissaMinion]

23 minutes ago, grayson said:

Gaily writes,

Thank you your ongoing compassion for Whitney. She seems to be in physical, emotional, and mental distress that is uncomfortable to observe. I also feel bad for her.

I'm in the same camp. As frustrated as I get watching her be self-centered and deluding herself....there are moments when I glimpse the very loving person underneath. I think it was the previous episode. She was teaching her class, and commenting about her dance group being empowered and wonderful, and she was cheering them on. I wanted to give her a hug at that moment. She was treating them so well....

She's not capable of treating herself well, at all. And that's just sad. Somebody needs to teach her HOW to treat herself well.

[DoctorWhovian]

2 hours ago, Gaily said:

And sorry again but isn't there anyone in her orbit who will help her and fight for her?  Jesus!  I like her parents, Hunter and Buddy but can't one of them say "hey, let us help you. Lets get you a therapist.  You don't have to live this way" in a kind, helpful way that is not at all shame based?  Whitney deserves a better life -- I don't want her to die.  Fine to be fat and fabulous as long as you are not on your way to an early grave.  Sorry but I care about Whitney and want better for her.

It's a mix of they tried and failed (she's an adult, if she doesn't want to change then she is not going to, no matter what kind of help they get her, just look at her reaction after the "funeral") and they are enablers (especially Buddy -- her dad is more passive and just doesn't seem to speak up but tries, and her mom is worse than her dad, but Buddy is just wrapped around her finger and will do whatever she wants). 

[Tosia]

Whit has a therapist...She mentioned one time that she had just come from an appt.  

Sooooo,  must not be a very good therapist.  

I agree with posters above that Whit is just taking the TLC money and .......running, or waddling, toward disability and early death.

Guess she's having a good enough time that health doesn't matter--yet.  Hard to feel sorry for her.  

Edited July 26, 2016 by Tosia

[mamapajama]

3 hours ago, Gaily said:

Sorry but I still feel really badly for Whitney. The cake tasting scene was very hard to watch -- they should not have filmed her stuffing her face with cake and then acting delusional ("I don't even like cake," she says as she chows on key lime cake, banana pudding layers, red velvet cake and white cake/white frosting in giant gulps).  The cameras showed her chewing food with her mouth open and eating big bites in rapid fire succession which is truly every fat person's worst nightmare along with trying on bathing suits and stepping on the scale.

Don't apologize for your compassion!  You sound like a caring person.  I found the cake tasting hard to watch, too, but for different reasons.  I am nauseated easily by seeing food in someone's mouth.  I had to look away when she opened her mouth for another bite, while the current bite was still in there.  I would have been upset at TLC if the cameras had been hidden, paparazzi-style, but Whitney was fully aware that they were there. I would not have acted that way, without cameras, in public or in front of a friend.  At 32, Whitney should have more self-control, and simple table manners, with or without cameras.

She advocates for no body shame, but needs to demonstrate a little self-respect and dignity.  When you show the world that you have no pride in your appearance:  poor grooming, tie-dyed two sizes too small leggings, eating with your mouth open, lying on the floor for strangers to feel your buttocks, you don't send the message that you are trying to command respect.

[DNR]

For REDDIT fans , Twits nemesis Kerryn the comic did an AMA ( ask me anything) where she answers ?? ( limited for tlc contractual reasons ) about her episode . The commenters are 99.9% pro comic 

link : 

https://m.reddit.com/r/fatlogic/comments/4ua3tb/i_am_kerryn_feehan_comedian_who_appeared_with/

Edited July 26, 2016 by DNR
Added link to reddit ama

[LocalGovt]

16 hours ago, mamapajama said:

Don't apologize for your compassion!  You sound like a caring person.  I found the cake tasting hard to watch, too, but for different reasons.  I am nauseated easily by seeing food in someone's mouth.  I had to look away when she opened her mouth for another bite, while the current bite was still in there.  I would have been upset at TLC if the cameras had been hidden, paparazzi-style, but Whitney was fully aware that they were there. I would not have acted that way, without cameras, in public or in front of a friend.  At 32, Whitney should have more self-control, and simple table manners, with or without cameras.

She advocates for no body shame, but needs to demonstrate a little self-respect and dignity.  When you show the world that you have no pride in your appearance:  poor grooming, tie-dyed two sizes too small leggings, eating with your mouth open, lying on the floor for strangers to feel your buttocks, you don't send the message that you are trying to command respect.

Mama, I think we are siblings, separated at birth!

[mamadrama]

14 hours ago, DNR said:

For REDDIT fans , Twits nemesis Kerryn the comic did an AMA ( ask me anything) where she answers ?? ( limited for tlc contractual reasons ) about her episode . The commenters are 99.9% pro comic 

link : 

https://m.reddit.com/r/fatlogic/comments/4ua3tb/i_am_kerryn_feehan_comedian_who_appeared_with/

We had a brief chat about this under this thread, if you go back a page. The "lard", er, typo, had people laughing. Too bad she couldn't say more.

[DNR]

21 hours ago, mamadrama said:

We had a brief chat about this under this thread, if you go back a page. The "lard", er, typo, had people laughing. Too bad she couldn't say more.

Oh! Sorry about that , i read about it and raced to this thread without reviewing the last cupla pages haha I hope once she's no longer under contract we get the full story.  Her comment " what's your role " killed me.

Excited for Will vs. Twit tonite ?

[DNR]

21 hours ago, mamadrama said:

We had a brief chat about this under this thread, if you go back a page. The "lard", er, typo, had people laughing. Too bad she couldn't say more.

Oh! Sorry about that , i read about it and raced to this thread without reviewing the last cupla pages haha I hope once she's no longer under contract we get the full story.  Her comment " what's your role " killed me.

Excited for Will vs. Twit tonite ?

[DNR]

21 hours ago, mamadrama said:

We had a brief chat about this under this thread, if you go back a page. The "lard", er, typo, had people laughing. Too bad she couldn't say more.

Oh! Sorry about that , i read about it and raced to this thread without reviewing the last cupla pages haha I hope once she's no longer under contract we get the full story.  Her comment " what's your role " killed me.

Excited for Will vs. Twit tonite ?

Sorry about the double post - my iPhone is on the fritz and i have no clue why - it's making me cray. ^^^^

[mamapajama]

57 minutes ago, DNR said:

I hope once she's no longer under contract we get the full story.

I would looove to see that happen.

[mamapajama]

Big Whit.    Rapping.    Tonight they have shown an "extra scene" which should have stayed hidden.    Hidden far away.    HUHUHUUUU!!  (Trying to spell out the guffaw.) 

[ClareWalks]

7 minutes ago, mamapajama said:

Big Whit.    Rapping.    Tonight they have shown an "extra scene" which should have stayed hidden.    Hidden far away.    HUHUHUUUU!!  (Trying to spell out the guffaw.) 

Oh dear. I'm guessing you don't mean lettuce (w)rapping either.

THANK YOU I'LL BE HERE ALL WEEK!

[Ketzel]

The complete fakeness of Whitney's "radio job" was on full display in this episode, where the radio hosts kept talking about the talent show they have the new interns put on "every semester."  Interns by the semester? Does this sound like a "job" they usually hire 32 year old "dancers" to do? I hope if this little competition earns the winner anything more than bragging rights, that "Big Whit" handed it over to one of the college students who was really there to work.

Edited July 28, 2016 by Ketzel

[okerry]

On 7/20/2016 at 9:45 PM, LocalGovt said:

Sorry to be repetitive, but that's how all the people on My 600 Pound Life eat.  As if they are eating furtively....afraid someone will snatch the plate out from under them before they can take another bite.  It's like they don't even have time to taste the food, but like they're trying to fill up their stomach as fast as they can.  Whitney makes every event a "once in a lifetime" excuse to eat to oblivion.

Isn't this another strong symptom of food addiction? I've noticed that, too - the person doesn't eat for the enjoyment or savoring of the food (which you might think they would) - no, it's just to throw down and fill up as fast as possible. There's not even time for the stomach to send an "I'm full" signal to the brain, which takes a few minutes. 

I just hope the show ends with a food addiction specialist getting hold of Whitney and taking her in for serious treatment. It would no doubt save her life and might help a lot of other people, too.

[okerry]

Virtually everything Whitney says and does screams "addict, addict, addict." And probably narcissist, too. Ruby Gettinger was the same way. Sad to watch but I really don't blame TLC. I'd be upset with them if they *did* whitewash a story like Whitney's and make it look better than it is.

[LocalGovt]

5 minutes ago, okerry said:

Isn't this another strong symptom of food addiction? I've noticed that, too - the person doesn't eat for the enjoyment or savoring of the food (which you might think they would) - no, it's just to throw down and fill up as fast as possible. There's not even time for the stomach to send an "I'm full" signal to the brain, which takes a few minutes. 

I just hope the show ends with a food addiction specialist getting hold of Whitney and taking her in for serious treatment. It would no doubt save her life and might help a lot of other people, too.

I made the mistake  of watching this episode again last night.  The cake tasting segment......she was shoveling (there's really no other word for it) large portions of that cake in her mouth with wild abandon. I don't think it was a trick of the editing, either, because there was no breakaway from her shoveling, and the last piece was still sitting in her mouth, not even chewed.   I can't believe I watched it again.

[Alapaki]

This is from the comedienne's AMA.  I hope it's not off-topic, but I do think it relates to what we saw in a very revealing way:

Quote

I did my research. I watched clips. On previous episodes Whitney smokes and participated in what she refers to as "PLT aka Parking Lot Time" where after an emotional outburst she goes to a drive thru and eats an enormous amount of food in her car alone. In my opinion this was treating a binge eating disorder very lightly

and

Quote

I am under contract so I have to be very careful but I had never seen the show before I was hired. Every interaction I had with Whitney was filmed and I spoke honestly.

Never saw the show before, but did research by viewing clips.  Personally, I don't recall ever seeing "PLT" or seeing Whitney smoking.  That suggests that the Producers have a lot of dirty footage on Whitney that they've heretofore left on the cutting-room floor.  

Interesting that they've insulated her and allowed her to sell an apparently phony fabulosity.  

But also interesting that they fed those clips to the person they hired to go after Whitney.

[Ketzel]

Here's the "extra" TLC had up after the first season.  Whitney talking about bingeing in parking lots as a way to calm down starts at around 3:08.

I don't think I ever saw Whitney smoking on tape either, but there was the scene (since redacted) in the episode where she is asking Will to take her back, and he talks about her coming late to workout sessions because she was hanging out on the steps of the gym and smoking. That was followed by a Whitney TH in which she admitted to being a smoker, blamed it on her time in Korea where everyone smoked and she complained she couldn't escape it. Then she said she'd quit several times, but is now smoking occasionally because Lennie smokes. (Also apparently redacted now.) And didn't Kerryn say she was told about Whitney's current habit by one or more of the TLC production assistants? Not that there probably isn't also footage of her smoking; I agree there probably is.

Edited July 29, 2016 by Ketzel

[riverblue22]

Silly of me to rebut Whitney, but I know two young men who taught in Korea for several years, and they didn't pick up smoking while there.  Although they did admit to lots of partying.

[Ketzel]

12 minutes ago, riverblue22 said:

Silly of me to rebut Whitney, but I know two young men who taught in Korea for several years, and they didn't pick up smoking while there.  Although they did admit to lots of partying.

[sarcastifont] Surely you aren't implying our Whitney was exaggerating or making excuses!! [/sarcastifont]

[ClareWalks]

Whitney can't take personal responsibility for ANY of her addictions, can she?

[greekmom]

Just rewatched the episode and a thought popped in my head.  If Kerryn Feehan offered Buddy the same deal that she offered her overweight friend he would be working out and slimming down. Just saying.

[flappa1016]

On 7/28/2016 at 6:08 PM, Ketzel said:

Here's the "extra" TLC had up after the first season.  Whitney talking about bingeing in parking lots as a way to calm down starts at around 3:08.

After I watched the link you provided, a recommended video was from a British show called "Fat Families".  I'm sucked in.  Now I have yet *another* series I need to watch, as if there aren't enough here in the US, lol.  I still haven't watched my way through the British series "Fat Doctor".

[Maggienolia]

On 7/21/2016 at 10:54 PM, geekamonggeeks said:

The comedienne going in on obese people before Whitney came in to argue with her was totally staged. You could see the DJs' faces change, like, "Oh, crap, Whitney is here and she's going to get pissed! Let's bring her in!" It was scripted through and through to try and give Whitney a way to stand up for her ~agenda~. Unfortunately for her, she didn't really have any good arguments and mainly stammered and stuttered her way through the conversation.

I also thought it was so ironic when Whitney called out Kerryn for "body shaming" before derisively calling her skinny. I think she said it several times, like it was automatically a negative attribute. I wonder how she would have reacted if Kerryn were heavier. She didn't look too pleased when her own co-worker (I think his name is Roy) admitted he didn't like being fat. It's like she can't fathom somebody having a different opinion from her. She goes on the defense immediately because she knows she's in the wrong.

The comedienne didn't seem that funny in the little we saw of her routine, though she did lay a lot of truth on Whitney. In her (Kerryn's) FB post, she does say she was hired by TLC to give her opinion (read as "to bait Whitney") which, fine, it's telly, and there COULD have been a useful debate from this but... well... reality TV so... 

When Roy made the comment in an earlier episode about not liking that he was heavy and not liking what he saw in the mirror - YES! Whitney's reaction was a "how dare you". It seems like it was more because he was saying what she actually feels. I just don't buy that she's all that thrilled with her weight and her body as she makes out. If she's so happy being fat, her comeback to Kerryn wouldn't have been "I lost 100#s" it would have been "I love my body just the way it is, at the weight it is, and wouldn't change a thing". BOOM. THAT would have been shutting down the bully, the body-shaming, whatever. But she is always on the defensive and making excuses and blah, blah, blah, blah. 

And Whitney is one to make fun of "vocal fry" (which Kerryn didn't really have - she's more nasal-to-whiny) when she has that laugh! 

LOVE when Kerryn said "I used it in my show because it's MY life too and my experience" - and everything about calling her out on using the No Body Shame campaign as a excuse. 

[ClareWalks]

2 minutes ago, Maggienolia said:

I just don't buy that she's all that thrilled with her weight and her body as she makes out. If she's so happy being fat, her comeback to Kerryn wouldn't have been "I lost 100#s" it would have been "I love my body just the way it is, at the weight it is, and wouldn't change a thing". BOOM. THAT would have been shutting down the bully, the body-shaming, whatever.

YAS! *waves hand in the air as if to say "preach!"*

[Barb23]

Why doesn't Whit have some snappy comeback comments ready to go when people yell things at her, like the big leprechaun comment at the parade or Kerryns comments noted above?

[AZChristian]

She does nothing for herself.  She'd have to hire someone to follow her around and make snappy comebacks.  Because just having someone else write them for her wouldn't be enough - what do you expect her to do . . . MEMORIZE stuff?

/sarcasm