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My Cat From Hell - General Discussion


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I've got a damn biter too (same one who grabs the interactive toy and flees the scene...then wonders why the game is no longer fun)! Now, he never really sinks his teeth in, and it is by no means out of the blue or every time he's touched--far from it--and it's clear he isn't upset, overstimulated, or feeling threatened. I usually find most things Jackson says to be pretty sensible but I don't know what to think of this. I guess I'd make more of an effort to get to the bottom of it, especially if I thought he could hurt someone, but (and here's the best part), I am the only one he does it to--me, the same person whose lap he needs to be on mere seconds later.

Edited by TattleTeeny
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I used to say that a certain cat of mine gave me "love bites".  He would suddenly run up and bite me on the leg.  It would startle me, but he didn't break the skin or cause me any pain.   I called them love bites because he never did it to anyone but me, and they didn't seem malicious.  Maybe he just wanted my attention.

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The late, great, Bailey - he of sitting silently at the door at 3:00 a.m. - would give love bites on the hand: bites so soft a toothless baby would use more force, followed by licking.  We'd joke that he even bit politely.

  • Love 3
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The biting I'm dealing with sounds like what Bastet describes her Bailey doing. I guess I don't blame Jackson for assuming the worst, considering some of the things he's seen. But I'm glad that I'm not the only person who's observed something different.

 

Are the prey and air wands intrechangeable, except for the ends? I'm trying to decide whether to try one, or both, or... what. This foster is new enough to me that I'm not sure yet whether she prefers the ground or the air, but I do need more toys for her, because she's uncommonly spry for her age (16). Also, does the string look easily replaceable if it frays?

 

I really thought Bombadil's person thought Jackson would enjoy the "wedding"-- she seemed to really not understand it as anything but adorable, and I wondered how many other social cues she either ignores or doesn't notice. The cat AND Jackson were anything but subtle in their rejection of the dress-up practices, and I wonder if she's so obtuse that people routinely tune her out or mock her, and she's escalating her own oblivion in response, so the whole thing spirals ever and ever worse til she's just wacko. But she did seem to make some changes eventually. I hope it wasn't only for the cameras. I really don't trust the editing on this show.

 

Sadly, I have met many, many people who you would not think were utter dimwits in general, but they are just plain IDIOTS when it comes to animals. Even sometimes people who seem to love their pets, don't seem to UNDERSTAND them at all. It's shocked me to see even devoted people projecting like crazy, or having no clue about basic stuff. And the thing that I really don't get about it is this: if you are having a problem, don't you try to find an answer? Some of what I know I noticed on my own, but a lot is stuff I went out and researched-- books, tv, the internet, other people -- info is all over the place. Why do so few people find it? Is it some kind of assumption of helplessness or futility, so why even try?

 

Then again, if a rescue organization actually required someone to "declaw" before adopting (as was said in an episode earlier this season), I don't suppose the randomly chosen person out of the general public can be faulted for not trusting expert advice.

  • Love 1
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I really thought Bombadil's person thought Jackson would enjoy the "wedding"-- she seemed to really not understand it as anything but adorable, and I wondered how many other social cues she either ignores or doesn't notice. The cat AND Jackson were anything but subtle in their rejection of the dress-up practices, and I wonder if she's so obtuse that people routinely tune her out or mock her, and she's escalating her own oblivion in response, so the whole thing spirals ever and ever worse til she's just wacko. But she did seem to make some changes eventually. I hope it wasn't only for the cameras. I really don't trust the editing on this show.

What I gather, then, is that you hope Bombadil's owner doesn't pull a "Pump"-- IOW, throwing out all the clothes for the cameras, only to start dressing him up again. Is that true?

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Are the prey and air wands intrechangeable, except for the ends? I'm trying to decide whether to try one, or both, or... what. This foster is new enough to me that I'm not sure yet whether she prefers the ground or the air, but I do need more toys for her, because she's uncommonly spry for her age (16). Also, does the string look easily replaceable if it frays?

 

All cats are different. My cat bit the string off of one of the wands and just goes after the tip of the wand only. I bought them a want with a long ribbon on the end. you'd of thought I was going to flay them alive. I should just cut the ribbon off and just use the wand.

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The parents didn't seem to think anything was wrong with Capri's behavior, and even seemed to think it was cute. I wonder if Sophie had brain damage, because she was more than tolerant, she looked like she was lifelessly limp after being shaken and roughed up to the point that would normally cause physical damage. Jackson was right that the way she was being roughly handled could easily break her back (or neck). Capri needed to know it was dangerous, not just that it was forbidden, and her parents needed to understand that, too. I'm glad Jackson is being more bluntly critical in his talking head segments, because the behaviors he showed were beyond just a little bit insensitive. I think Shadow was legitimately terrified.

I finally caught this episode this past weekend. I thought the way Capri was hugging on Sophie was totally reminiscent of the way cartoon Elmyra loves, hugs, and squeezes animals

 

Capri was lucky Sophie was beyond tolerant. Normally a cat would have either fled or have scratched her up by now. 

 

I'm disappointed that Capri's and London's mother was allowing this behavior. At least the father had some kind of sense (when he said he wanted to rehome Shadow). 

  • Love 2
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What I gather, then, is that you hope Bombadil's owner doesn't pull a "Pump"-- IOW, throwing out all the clothes for the cameras, only to start dressing him up again. Is that true?

Yes. I'm worried she acted like a changed woman for the cameras but will go back to her previous behaviors once they leave.

  • Love 1
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Are the prey and air wands intrechangeable, except for the ends? I'm trying to decide whether to try one, or both, or... what. This foster is new enough to me that I'm not sure yet whether she prefers the ground or the air, but I do need more toys for her, because she's uncommonly spry for her age (16). Also, does the string look easily replaceable if it frays?

 

You know--I want to say yes but I am not sure. But I would guess so because the end pieces are also sold without the wands. I think the link above might have that info for sure though. And the string is not really a string; it's a smooth wire that does not look like it will unravel, like my cats' other favorite toy, always does, and then not only catches on the carpet but causes me to worry that the metal will hurt them (I e-mailed the company and they sent me a new one, sans "mouse" in their improved design...we'll see). 

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On tonight's episode...

Season 7, Episode 5

Fat Elvis

First Aired: May 2, 2015

A man's bloodthirsty cat could ruin his photography business and drive away his assistant; a couple have their hands full with a 21-pound cat.

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Since we don't have a My Cat From Hell in the Media forum, I'll just mention here that it's fun that Jackson and this show have become one of  the regular subjects of mockery on The Soup this season.  

  • Love 2
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You know--I want to say yes but I am not sure. But I would guess so because the end pieces are also sold without the wands. I think the link above might have that info for sure though. And the string is not really a string; it's a smooth wire that does not look like it will unravel, like my cats' other favorite toy, always does, and then not only catches on the carpet but causes me to worry that the metal will hurt them (I e-mailed the company and they sent me a new one, sans "mouse" in their improved design...we'll see). 

 

The wire looks like the one on our cat's near favorite, the Cat Dancer.  That online price is extra cheap, I think we've usually paid $4-5 - still cheap enough that I could buy one every three years or so and come out ahead.

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(edited)

The wire on the Cat Dancer is much better (mine loves that one too); as opposed to one wire, the Cat Teaser is a few super-thin, almost hairlike wires twisted together; they keep coming loose at the rubber tip and sticking out all over and getting caught in the carpet.

Also, yes--you can replace the toy parts on the end of the JG cat toy.

Edited by TattleTeeny
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My friend adopted a 22-pound cat (owner surrender) from the shelter a couple of years ago, and his thyroid, blood sugar, etc. all checked out normal, so we can only theorize that his previous owners were feeding him Big Macs and donuts.  Because while, yes, he has a hearty appetite, he's perfectly content to eat a normal amount of good-quality (high protein, moderate fat, low carb) canned cat food, and it didn't take all that long on such a routine to get him down to 15 pounds.  So while it's certainly possible they were just free-feeding dry food and that's how it happened, we tend to think he was given human treats.

 

So when I saw the donut scene in the promo for the season and told her about it, we both felt oddly vindicated.

 

(Now, I will admit that one of the cats I grew up with loved powdered donuts, so we would occasionally give him a small piece or two when we were eating one.)

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It sucks that a something so big and huggable--a fat cat--is unhealthy. They just look so cute from a superficial standpoint. 

 

My friend has a cat that has got to be 25 pounds. But he's not overweight, he's just huge! His head--which is about the height of my knee--is the size of a small cantaloupe and his hands and feet look like those of a smaller dog. He was the sickly runt of the litter too.

  • Love 2
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I loved seeing Elvis rocking it on the walking trail with his harness.  He seems like such a huggable, squishable mellow kitty.  I'm glad his owners are getting a handle on his weight, but I have no idea why they wouldn't have realized donuts are not cat food and are contributing to his problems. 

 

I do hope Elvis' cat mom gets inspired to care for her own potential health issues, too.  It was great that Jackson shared his story with her.  He's looking pretty fit these days.

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The thing is, people can find cats that are inherently large without being fat - and if they want a kitten, they can check its mom and, if possible, father. I had a very large-boned cat who was thin at 14 pounds. The vet wanted her to weigh at least 16. 

 

Overweight cats are in danger of any number of ailments, including diabetes, which is awful. (Giving the shots is the easy part, monitoring blood sugar levels is the problem.) You can always tell cat owners who've had a diabetic cat by their fanaticism about finding gluten-free cat food. Donuts are not gluten free.

 

Anyway, I'm glad Elvis is doing better. Jackson wrote about his weight struggles in his memoir, btw, so that wasn't news to me. But I don't recall that he's ever mentioned it on the show prior to this.

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The thing that was very telling about many people who end up on this show was that seemingly nice and intelligent photographer actually saying he thought his cat would be an "accessory." He may have been joking around, but it seems all too true for so many cat owners, on this show or off.

  • Love 2
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(edited)

The thing is, people can find cats that are inherently large without being fat - and if they want a kitten, they can check its mom and, if possible, father. I had a very large-boned cat who was thin at 14 pounds. The vet wanted her to weigh at least 16. 

 

Overweight cats are in danger of any number of ailments, including diabetes, which is awful. (Giving the shots is the easy part, monitoring blood sugar levels is the problem.) You can always tell cat owners who've had a diabetic cat by their fanaticism about finding gluten-free cat food. Donuts are not gluten free.

 

Anyway, I'm glad Elvis is doing better. Jackson wrote about his weight struggles in his memoir, btw, so that wasn't news to me. But I don't recall that he's ever mentioned it on the show prior to this.

My cat Figaro became overweight because he had a problem with his thyroid. He was 16 pounds when he should have been 12. Now that he's properly medicated and not eating dry food, he's lost the weight and is a much healthier, happier kitty. We weren't overfeeding him, but we were feeding him the wrong stuff for his health issues.

 

I was surprised that Jackson didn't mention that he also got high off of food. (Or maybe he did and they edited it out.) In his memoir, he said turned to food to cope after he got off of drugs and alcohol, and that's when he ballooned to 400 lbs. He even said he'd black out after eating ridiculous amounts of fast food. He got gastric bypass surgery and he looks really great now, and so much healthier. I really hope that Elvis and his mom continue on their path to healthy weight loss.

Edited by Mindy McIndy
  • Love 2
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I was surprised that Jackson didn't mention that he also got high off of food. (Or maybe he did and they edited it out.)

 

He didn't say it in those words but I think he made sure she got that he knew exactly the feeling.

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Thanks for all the cat toy reviews. I appreciate knowing all the details without having to examine each item up close.

 

RE this week's episode, I thought it was particularly strange that the photographer made that comment about not wanting to catify his studio. I thought the place looked shabby, and not at all like he had put much thought into the decor anyway. It wasn't sleek and elegant, or fancy and luxurious, or really anything else particularly intentional, as far as I could tell. the couch looked ugly and old. The walls were mostly bare. It didn't even look like a place you'd go for a professional photo portrait. Stuff didn't match, even. The cat highway might have turned out to be the most beautiful thing in the place.

 

With the other family, did I hear correctly that it was the kid who asked the show to help them? Apparently the parents were not even part of the original application. I feel bad for the kid, who seems extraordinarily level-headed considering both his parents seemed to lack motivation, insight, and interpersonal skills. I bet weight is not the only issue in the family. I hope that their experience with Elvis and Jackson catalyzes them in other areas, as well. Sometimes I think people just feel like there's no answer, but once they see something is solved, they can be more hopeful about tackling other problems.

 

I liked seeing how Elvis took to the harness walks. I fostered a cat who had been trained to walk on leash and really liked it, but I always thought that was something you'd have to get them used to at an early age. Seeing Elvis enjoying it even though he was introduced later in life, encouraged me to think maybe more cats would like it than I'd realized.

  • Love 1
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RE this week's episode, I thought it was particularly strange that the photographer made that comment about not wanting to catify his studio. I thought the place looked shabby, and not at all like he had put much thought into the decor anyway. It wasn't sleek and elegant, or fancy and luxurious, or really anything else particularly intentional, as far as I could tell. the couch looked ugly and old. The walls were mostly bare. It didn't even look like a place you'd go for a professional photo portrait. Stuff didn't match, even. The cat highway might have turned out to be the most beautiful thing in the place.

 

Maybe because it was so small, he was worried it would be even more cramped?

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The thing that was very telling about many people who end up on this show was that seemingly nice and intelligent photographer actually saying he thought his cat would be an "accessory." He may have been joking around, but it seems all too true for so many cat owners, on this show or off.

 

So.much. truth.  I was yelling at the tv, "That is a living, breathing being! Not an "accessory", asshole!" He didn't want to make things comfortable for his cat, he just wanted a prop for his photography. 

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I started off feeling quite irritated at the photographer and his "accessory" attitude, and then feeling judgmental and accusatory about the severely overweight woman and her severely overweight cat.  But by the end, for some reason, I actually got tearful when Jackson talked with the woman and got through to her on a compassionate level.  He is such a quality human being!  

 

As for the Capri/London episode (ugh, place of conception??), weren't those people from a Real Housewives franchise?  So the children have no doubt been encouraged to act up and be outrageous for the camera since birth.  Those parents did not deserve to have any pets, much less children.  I feel for whichever teachers get the children in their classes.  How Jackson keeps his cool in those situations is amazing to me.    

  • Love 2
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As for the Capri/London episode (ugh, place of conception??), weren't those people from a Real Housewives franchise?  So the children have no doubt been encouraged to act up and be outrageous for the camera since birth.  Those parents did not deserve to have any pets, much less children.  I feel for whichever teachers get the children in their classes.  How Jackson keeps his cool in those situations is amazing to me.    

 

Yup, the kids were obviously used to "acting" for the cameras.  Compare the little girl's wooden "even if he hurt me, I'd still love him!" which played ad nauseum on the commercials to the little boy with the cat Einstein.  Now that kid I fully believed wasn't putting on a show for the cameras and absolutely would have pitched a fit if they tried to get rid of that cat.

  • Love 2
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(edited)

I finally caught this episode this past weekend. I thought the way Capri was hugging on Sophie was totally reminiscent of the way cartoon Elmyra loves, hugs, and squeezes animals

 

Capri was lucky Sophie was beyond tolerant. Normally a cat would have either fled or have scratched her up by now. 

 

I'm disappointed that Capri's and London's mother was allowing this behavior. At least the father had some kind of sense (when he said he wanted to rehome Shadow).

Freakin' reality whore Peggy Tanous. Foreclosed and divorced? http://radaronline.com/exclusives/2015/02/rhoc-peggy-tanous-home-foreclosure/I wonder if she got paid to be on this ep.

Aannyway...it was clear that these two Orange County Entitleds couldn't recognized that their special little snowflake was abusing the cats. Rehome Shadow? Keep the cats and rehome the brats, say I.

Does anyone remember the "kitty bit" they did last week or the week before, where someone was asking why her cat gives "love bites" and Jackson said it was because of over-stimulation, i.e. not a "love bite" but a sign she was annoying the cat with too much petting? I have a cat who does that and I really don't think Jackson's answer applies. She will come over to me and immediately grab my hand and start nibbling it. It feels like play biting or affectionate grooming behavior to me. I think I can read her moods and body language well enough to be clear on the difference between a "stop it!" bite and a something else. But I wondered if anyone else has had this experience.

My beloved, departed Maine Coon used to do that to me, especially when I was "giving him lovings" as he sat on my chest after I came home from work. He would very gently close his mouth on my hand for a few seconds, then let go. Purring constantly, of course. It was rare that he didn't purr. I assumed it was tied back to the mating instinct since males bite females on the back of the neck during that ritual.

Edited by Lone Wolf
  • Love 3
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To anyone who's bought Jackson's cat toys, can you tell me if the sticks are long enough?  I just got some nice ones from Foster & Smith, and they're too short for me (I'm 5'9"), and I have to either bend over the whole time, or sit down.

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To anyone who's bought Jackson's cat toys, can you tell me if the sticks are long enough?  I just got some nice ones from Foster & Smith, and they're too short for me (I'm 5'9"), and I have to either bend over the whole time, or sit down.

 

I'm 5' 9.5" and just sit down when using the wand toys. If you want to stand while you play, buy some peacock feathers on Amazon. They're really long.

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So a bowtie is like a fancy collar, that's probably a decent compromise.

 

My cats would kill me in my sleep if I tried to put them into costumes.

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I have a question about walking cats and FIV - from what I understand, going outdoors is one of the risk factors for FIV. And I think I've heard Jackson talk about the need to keep cats inside for that reason on this program. But he also often tells people to take their cats for walks. I loved how much Elvis was enjoying his walk, and if I had a cat I would love to take it for walks too. But how do you balance that against FIV infection? Is it a matter of keeping your cat from interacting with other cats while out on walks? Something else?

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How do people have a cat for seven years- since it was 6 weeks old- and not have it be socialized?

As for the feral cats, I don't believe Mama Cat gave birth to all of those cats. They knew where to go for the chow!

  • Love 1
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So a bowtie is like a fancy collar, that's probably a decent compromise.

My cats would kill me in my sleep if I tried to put them into costumes.

My cats wouldn't wait for me to go to sleep before killing me if I tried to put them in costumes.

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(edited)

I have a question about walking cats and FIV - from what I understand, going outdoors is one of the risk factors for FIV. And I think I've heard Jackson talk about the need to keep cats inside for that reason on this program. But he also often tells people to take their cats for walks. I loved how much Elvis was enjoying his walk, and if I had a cat I would love to take it for walks too. But how do you balance that against FIV infection? Is it a matter of keeping your cat from interacting with other cats while out on walks? Something else?

I think the advice is against letting your kitty out unsupervised, because they might get into fights with an FIV+ cat. Other than being infected from birth, it's passed through bites and scratches. I've heard of many people with both an FIV+ cat and an FIV- cat indoors, without the other cat getting infected, as their cats don't fight to the point of drawing blood. And being FIV+ isn't an automatic death sentence, as these cats can live a normal life with regular vet checkups.

 

ETA: There are vaccines against FIV, but it doesn't protect 100%. Also, once vaccinated, there is no way to tell the difference between an infected cat and one that's been vaccinated, as the test looks for antibodies against FIV.

Edited by riley702
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I've been working with my cats to get them used to a harness and leash. We've gone from the drama queen flop "I can't even stand up with this thing on me!" to patiently letting me put it on them if they meow at the door. We haven't gotten past the apartment hallway yet, as they vacillate between wanting to explore and freaking out at the slightest noise and running back to my door, but they really do seem to like it. And they love to scratch the tough all-weather carpeting in the hall without being scolded. They've tentatively started exploring the stairs to the upstairs apartments and love to investigate all the different smells coming from the other apartments, but I'm just waiting for the day someone opens their door as my cats are sniffing around! LOL

 

Here are two shops on Etsy that will make harnesses based on your cat's measurements in just about any fabric or design.

https://www.etsy.com/shop/LandOBurnsBengals

 

https://www.etsy.com/shop/MynwoodCatJackets

  • Love 1
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How do people have a cat for seven years- since it was 6 weeks old- and not have it be socialized?

As for the feral cats, I don't believe Mama Cat gave birth to all of those cats. They knew where to go for the chow!

 

I was wondering which animals came first - maybe the kitten was not introduced into the house properly, or maybe the newer animals weren't introduced properly after the kitten/now cat had marked its territory and all.

 

With the feral cats plus Chloe, I don't understand why Chloe somehow was calmer after Mama Cat was spayed.  How would Chloe know the difference?  And I don't get why the family was acting like their issues had been solved - they still have 20 cats in the yard. 

  • Love 1
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(edited)

I was confused by this week's episode, also.

 

It seemed to me that the cat in the first story had no perches or other places to get away and was stressed by the crowded situation. But I guess having the hunting games worked just as well.

 

I *think* they were implying that it was the presence of intact male cats who came courting "mama" and sprayed the yard that was what was stressing Chloe, and once Mama was spayed, the toms were not coming around anymore, so Chloe was calm. I was surprised, though. I thought she was excited by the general presence of other cats. From her body language (and the fact she was neither crying nor peeing), to me it looked less like she was territorially threatened and more like she wanted to go out and play with them. Maybe they could bring one into the house for her to enjoy.

 

As for why the humans felt their problem had been solved, I have no idea. It seemed like a pretty big change in attitude for the mother, and I wondered if it had been staged, because she gave no explanation whatsoever for her change of heart.

 

One thing I will say for this season is, despite the confusing editing and general incredulity I feel when watching, they are mixing things up and taking more cases that don't seem just like all the others that we've seen before. I think it's smart to highlight different issues that have general educational value, like the issue of feral colonies. I just wish that the editing didn't leave so much out that I didn't really understand the transformation. Also, they seem to be taking more "celebrity" cases. I wonder if that helps the ratings.

Edited by possibilities
  • Love 2
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(edited)
I have a question about walking cats and FIV - from what I understand, going outdoors is one of the risk factors for FIV. And I think I've heard Jackson talk about the need to keep cats inside for that reason on this program. But he also often tells people to take their cats for walks. I loved how much Elvis was enjoying his walk, and if I had a cat I would love to take it for walks too. But how do you balance that against FIV infection? Is it a matter of keeping your cat from interacting with other cats while out on walks? Something else?

 

Generally, it's pretty hard to spread FIV without some real-deal, down-and-dirty contact, like biting. There have been FIV-positive cats who have shared water bowls and even groomed their non-FIV housemates without spreading the disease (that said, though, I still couldn't bring myself to risk my own cats' health by adopting an FIV cat. I'd worry too much, even though many cats can have HIV without it affecting their lives).

 

I assume that, for time-constraint reasons*, we simply don't see Jackson telling people of the precautions they should take, and I would guess that he probably wouldn't advise, say, the cat-colony lady to walk her indoor cat outside among all the strays living there. 

 

* I wish the show would do one cat per episode; I'd be interested in hearing more little details that production probably assumes are boring for viewers.

 

Edit: Oy, I called it "HIV" above! Clearly I am confused as to what the H and/or the F mean in this scenario! I also treat my cats like people so I am not surprised.

Edited by TattleTeeny
  • Love 2
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I have also been wishing for more depth, maybe one cat per episode or two cats in the same area with similar issues. For the latter, Jackson could explain how the differences are addressed. Or they could track cats from the same litter to see how they're doing in different homes. Or visit a shelter and discuss how the shelter could optimize placements and how the adopters could be sure they're getting the right cat.

  • Love 5
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(edited)

I always notice what I think is a gap in what he says and what the results are, or what the people's reactions are--for instance, the parents in the recent episode; they were so against having a colony at all. Then, later, they seemed as if all they'd wanted was the mother cat to be spayed. I wonder if Jackson educated them on overcrowded kill shelters and all that to change their minds because they really seemed to dig it afterward. 

 

I wish I could find out about my two cats' siblings. My two seem to have no secondary teeth, which is a genetic issue. I want to know if the others are the same. (My b&w one lost four of six of his bottom baby teeth and none grew in! He's got such a cute gap between his fangs. His brother lost only one bottom baby tooth and also never grew a new one. Everyone's fine as far as eating and all that though. It's just weird.)

 

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Edited by TattleTeeny
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(edited)

Everyone's fine as far as eating and all that though.

 

Some relatives have a cat with no teeth, who eats - canned and dry - like a champ.  My Maddie has always had terrible teeth, despite regular cleanings for the time I've had her (I adopted her from the shelter 15 years ago, where she was housed as a young adult stray), whether due to genetics or inadequate nutrition when she was a kitten, and has lost quite a few of them over the years (including both fangs).  She had three more extracted last year, leaving her with not one place in her mouth where an upper and lower meet.  Once she healed, she didn't miss a step at the food bowl.

Edited by Bastet
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It seems that ours just never had any! I was stunned until I read that it happens sometimes. Poor cats--I just kept prying their mouths open to see. And poor vet; I kept e-mailing him about it! Oh, the perils of being a first-time kitten mom.

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Is it congenital that he's missing his premolars? I know that happens in people sometimes. Don't you wish you had a hidden camera to catch the look on his face? I work in a hospital and once confounded my dentist when, after removing the needle to numb my jaw, I demanded, "What gauge was that thing? Felt like a 16 gauge!" He stammered and hurried to show me it was actually much thinner than that. He'd accidentally nicked a nerve. He was so flustered and said he'd never been asked that before. Still makes me giggle.

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