S02.E04: Honeymoons

[Tara Ariano]

The newlyweds embark on their honeymoons after only knowing each other for just a few days.

[Mom2twoNonna2-3]

It's so sad that Sean is not taking the time to hear Davina. She heard him and gave him an appropriate response to everything he's said. Why can't he do the same for her? I hope their talk turns things around.

 

Hey Jaclyn & Ryan here's an idea: Ryan can shop on Christmas eve, then you can both go to Italian Grandma's for dinner, the stores will be closed by then. Christmas morning at his mom's then afternoon with your family. Not that hard to compromise.

 

Ryan and Jessica. I'm holding my judgement on them.

[JAndy]

ITA with what you said about Ryan and Jaclyn. They can totally compromise on that. It looks like from the previews that they are ok though.

Sean and davina there is something a little off about them.

Oh and I don't like Ryan D. He acts like a jerk.

[belladonna77]

Ryan was being a total jerk on the honeymoon.  It's called a compromise.  He might want to go fast on the jet ski, but Jessica doesn't.  How about addressing Jessica's needs?  Be a gentleman.  And you know he knew he was being a jackass to Jessica by calling her piercing and tattoo trashy, but he didn't want to admit he was wrong and he made it all about him.  He's a very selfish person and Jessica should RUN from this relationship.

[Setlist]

I can't believe that I knew that Davina liked her coffee black from the last episode, and Sean seemed to forget within an actual day.

Jacklyn still hits a nerve for me. I'm kind of glad that Ryan was able to have some control over his own honeymoon. I kind of wish they had the "let's experience things we both like" attitude that Jessica has.

Speaking of which, if Ryan is willing to storm off so quickly over a miscommunication about a Monroe piercing, I kind of fear how he'll react over the bigger issues. (For the record, I also think Jessica looks better without it, but not all facial piercings symbolize trash. Harsh words there, Ryan.)

[davetheman]

Ryan and Jaclyn are the only normal well adjusted people on this show. So far. LOL

I'm only 20mins in and Davina and Sean are seeming like a worse and worse pairing.

Sean comes off as a creeper

[JAndy]

I can't believe that I knew that Davina liked her coffee black from the last episode, and Sean seemed to forget within an actual day.

Jacklyn still hits a nerve for me. I'm kind of glad that Ryan was able to have some control over his own honeymoon. I kind of wish they had the "let's experience things we both like" attitude that Jessica has.

Speaking of which, if Ryan is willing to storm off so quickly over a miscommunication about a Monroe piercing, I kind of fear how he'll react over the bigger issues. (For the record, I also think Jessica looks better without it, but not all facial piercings symbolize trash. Harsh words there, Ryan.)

And really ryan shouldnt be one to judge with his entire tattoo sleeve. Some people might think that looks trashy.

[PityFree]

Ryan D. Is a pig and Jessica should file for a divorce yesterday. Good job, "experts!"

[belladonna77]

Ryan and Jaclyn are the only normal well adjusted people on this show. So far. LOL

I'm only 20mins in and Davina and Sean are seeming like a worse and worse pairing.

Sean comes off as a creeper

Sean really is a creeper.  The more I watch of him, the less I like him.  I totally get why Davina is holding back from having sex with him.  Asking her if she was noisy during sex while they're getting massages was SO wrong.  He seems like one of those nice guys who becomes a woman's friend and then gets upset when she doesn't want to date them.

Edited April 8, 2015 by belladonna77

[okerry]

From what we're being shown, Ryan D is a passive-aggressive jerk who is already done with Jessica. I will be absolutely stunned if they are still together at the end of six weeks. Does she have grounds for a lawsuit against the "experts" for leaving her alone with such nasty man?

Also, I think Jaclyn and Ryan are doing all right. She does keep at a distance because she's not ready to have sex with him yet, but she does flirt with him quite a bit and is quite open to touching him and letting him touch her. Taking your time really does help, even if you are legally married!

[emjohnson03]

I keep telling myself editing with Ryan but that was a bit much, walking out. Real class there. He kinda reminds me of my ex, trying to play off being all playful and if she doesn't like it, well deal. So immature. Very insecure too. Dude, be a real man and not a child.

 

I thought I like Sean but I don't know. Both him and Davina are so insecure. I agree that he needed to pay more attention to her feelings but I think she knows she needs to stop putting up walls and just let it be. I feel like they both needed some serious therapy before getting into any kind of real relationship. (and of course they were all tested and all that..eye roll!)

 

I do think Jaclyn and Ryan are the most realistic and progressing. I like how self aware Jacklyn was on the beach. At least she knows she needs to get out of the friend zone or they will be screwed. Ryan is such a sweetheart. He really is the best guy that I have seen. He may have some family baggage and independence issues, but he has the most solid head in the game. No games, no agendas, no creepy. Just a real nice down to earth guy who a sweet girl deserves and she seems it.

 

Oh and six weeks? That's dumb. It's not even close to the honeymoon phase being over. You need to be with someone through all seasons and that's at least a year.

Edited April 8, 2015 by emjohnson03

[davetheman]

40 mins in.

I'm starting to realize that Ryan D is the male version of Jaclyn. I think he is kind of a jokester, but I think that is the wall he is putting up as he brings her in. I think he wants to do things that he thinks will scare her off or test her to see if she wants to stay involved with him and if she "passes" he will try to open up himself to her. Right now he seems very guarded wtih her, while she is very open with her.

 

I was thinking this might be a bad pairing but I think they might have a future, barring something big coming up later in this episode or down the line.

[Snarklepuss]

I don't agree that Sean should have been more aware of and consoling of Davina's feelings.  I am beginning to think Davina is high maintenance in addition to fragile.  The guy just met her and he's supposed to be oh so tuned into her every feeling already?  That's a bit much to expect on like oh, day FOUR into a relationship.  I agree that there's something a bit creepy about Sean but on this point I am giving him some slack.

 

I totally agree with everything said about Ryan D. being a selfish immature jerk.  Like the dude has a huge tattoo on his arm and he calls Jess's piercing trashy and then lies to get out of it?  Then he storms off like a big baby?  Yikes, she definitely should RUN from this guy.

 

Mr. Snarklepuss and I were saying of all three couples we would want to hang with Ryan and Jaclyn.  I am liking them both separately and together more and more.  They are the most mature and grounded of all the couples and have the most chance of success.  I also loved Jaclyn's self awareness about not wanting to get stuck too long in the "friend zone".  I appreciated a lot of what she said and could imagine myself feeling the same as her in that situation.  I think that as time goes on and she lets Ryan into her life a little bit more every day she will be able to let her huge walls down with him and let herself be vulnerable enough to trust him more.

[ElectricCityy]

Jessica and Ryan spent most of their honeymoon in the water. Did they do anything she wanted to do? And if he thinks piercings are trashy on other people he thinks they are trashy on her. Blah. He's an ass.

 

Davina was acting weird. Like? There were barely any tears coming out of those eyes. How was Sean supposed to know. He needs to listen to her more though. She seems to need constant reassurance.

 

Jaclyn and Ryan... I really don't know what to think of Jaclyn at this point. I understand that she doesn't know how to be in a relationship but would her behavior he any better if she were actually attracted to him? I think so. More and More I feel like she shouldn't have agreed to marrying him.

[Wonmar]

I don't think Ryan D is so bad. I definitely think he and Jess need to figure out how to communicate with each other. When they share what they want in marriage they are very similar. He is affectionate with her, he says he wants intimacy and commitment. I don't think he is that good of an actor to make that up. They will need to learn to communicate and not assume the other is getting their messages. I think she'll also need him to be more conversational with her and she'll feel distant if they can't have some open intimate conversations. I think he feels great about her and assumes his "playful" behavior is recieved as flirting. He did shut her out when he walked out at dinner. Not sure what the full story was on the trash comments either. I don't know what was going on there.

[davetheman]

DAvina comes off as so damn needy. Its cool that your mom was a skier, why would anyone possibly want to start talking about how cool your mom is when you are about to go skiing. Sean is definitely weird, but the way she is going about trying to gin up some praise for her mom is weird as hell.

 

Have to give Ryan D props for doing the dolphin thing with a smile instead of complaining the whole time.

 

Davina talking about her old date then crying about Sean using a cheesy line and backing off is weird. On top of other issues, this chick is crazy needy. Red flag. Major red flag. I can see why her friends said this thing was going to fail. I don't think she is ready for a serious relationship, she isn't a happy person who is happy with her life and who is happy experiencing it. She is damaged goods and until she fixes that crap in her life and her mental makeup she will never be ready for someone to be in her life as a partner. hyper-needy and overly defensive. Not marriage material.

 

I'm gonna go with Ryan D on the fight at the end. I've been in the exact same situation about the exact same thing. Not liking piercings and tats in general doesn't mean that he thinks that about the person who has them that he is talking to.

[cpcathy]

Davina does seem high maintenance--what was it exactly she was crying about? I'm already tired of hearing Sean's voice and everything that comes out of their mouths. Color me surprised, but I'm okay with the Jaclyn-Ryan pairing. And how come this show is 75 minutes, and yet no one says anything of any worth?

[sleekandchic]

I'm actually concerned for Jessica's safety. If nothing else, her psychological and emotional health are taking a beating. Her face reflected inner turmoil.

Last season, I worried for Monet because of Vaughn's asshattery, but this Ryan D guy is much worse to me.

Really, why did he bother with this show? He KNOWS he's not ready for marriage.

Edited April 8, 2015 by sleekandchic

[davetheman]

I think Ryan D and Jessica really just had a miscommunication problem.

She took something he said to heart when it wasn't intended that way at all by him and he is probably just as mad at her as she is at him for taking something he said clearly in a way he did not mean.

 

They just have to talk that out.

[roamyn]

Dave, yes maybe she did take it wrong, but the anger from this guy is seriously scarry!

Maybe another guy sees it differently, but my mother was in a relationship with a man who behaved that way all the time (as well as the "joking") and it happened to be my father. That type of anger and physically harmful pranking can lead to abuse.

I know...I've seen it first hand.

[Scorpiosunshine]

I don't think Davina wanted praise for her mother's skiing skills, I just think she wanted Sean to acknowledge that he heard her. It's weird when you say something and the person to whom you're speaking carries on as if you never said anything at all.

Acknowledging a statement is pretty much standard conversation fare, and Sean does seem to be lacking in that area. That can not only be annoying and hurtful, but it can say a lot about someone, too. It usually screams "me me me" in my experience. How hard is it to say, "oh that's cool!" or "Really, huh!" If that's needy then I guess I consider manners "needy", because to me it's just being considerate. (How does one not even bother to respond, especially when you're having a conversation?)

As for the crying, I think that she was overwhelmed and simply wanted Sean to do what most people would do in that moment - - acknowledge the emotion and maybe soothe with physical touch. I bet if he'd not said a word and just pulled her in for a hug she'd have been fine /felt comforted.

I do agree that she may be a bit needy, but I haven't seen anything unreasonable. I think my opinion of her has become more positive while my opinion of Sean has become more negative. I get a huge selfish vibe from him. Maybe because he grew from a picked-on-boy to a handsome man that he over compensates a bit.

Ryan and Jacklyn are growing on me and coming into their own. I'm happy to see that and am liking them both more.

Ryan and Jessica : I don't want to dislike him, but he comes off as so childish. I hope it's like someone said, that it's his way of testing (which is still childish but is at least understandable.) I hope he is a great guy and doesn't hurt her, but he needs to grow up and show affection like an adult instead of a middle schooler whose just realizing cooties aren't real.

Edited April 8, 2015 by Scorpiosunshine

[Snarklepuss]

I don't think Sean could even see what Davina was feeling in that moment.  She was facing away from him and toward the camera, so we saw it, but she was not exactly obviously crying.  Plus the scenery they were looking at was overwhelming and I think Sean could have been easily distracted by the situation and everything going on around them and not be as aware of her as he would be if they were alone in a room without a camera on them and a horse drawn carriage.  I am not even a big Sean fan, in fact he creeps me out in some ways, but I am willing to sit out judgement of him on this.  He hasn't established a pattern of behavior like this so I am not so willing to find fault with him on insensitivity as I am with Ryan D., who has shown over and over again that he is an immature prankster.  If Sean were to do something like this over and over again, perhaps I'd change my mind.

[Pepper Mostly]

I've said from day one that Ryan D. has anger issues. I stand by that assessment. He seems to have a lot of free floating hostility which he sublimates as "jokes". Jessica did everything he wanted, even though she was scared. Not once did he offer reassurance or a kind word. Just his adolescent "jokes" and "kidding". He's so afraid he'll look whipped to his buddies that he's being a total jerk. (Newflash dude--I'm guessing your sainted Poppy didn't give a damn what his bros thought. His wife was his priority, not his asshole friends.) Jesus, he even thought he was being emasculated by swimming with dolphins. And he has no interest whatsoever in communicating. He says its important, but he must come from some planet where communicating means "I say what is supposed to happen, and you shut up". When Jessica tried to explain how she felt, he stormed off like a teenager. He is AWFUL and my heart goes out to Jessica. Every time Ryan opens his mouth all that comes out is douchebaggery.

 

Davina I'm giving a pass for now. She has high expectations and low patience, I think. She expects all smooth sailing and no friction. I had a moment of "oh-oh" but they sat down and talked like grown ups, so I'm still hopeful for them. I do think she is fragile, and high maintenance, but I also think she knows this about herself and is willing to change.

 

I have great hope for Jaclyn and Ryan! The dance lesson was so cute! (imagine if Jessica and Ryan had a dance lesson! or a couples massage! the mind reels.) I appreciate the effort they are both making. Back to my original Jackie love.

[janerazor]

I didn't think it was fair of Davina to get upset that Sean didn't react the way she wanted him to on the sleigh ride. She was expecting Sean to know exactly what she was feeling and exactly the way to respond. But that kind of knowledge about someone isn't there (in the majority of cases) after knowing someone only a few days. And not that I'm a fan of Sean! His asking her if she was noisy during sex while they were getting the couple's massage was so hilariously inappropriate. It looked like the women giving the massages were biting the insides of their cheeks to keep from laughing. 

 

Unless the "experts" asked Jessica if she liked men who expressed their affection by being big ol' douchebags and Jessica answered, "Why, yes, nothing says 'I love you' more to me than a man disregarding my fears and insecurities," then the experts clearly failed in this pairing.

 

OK, Jaclyn is still kind of a ball-busting bitch--and I mean that in the best way--BUT she did say some really nice things about Ryan this episode. I feel like the two of them are learning about each other in a more organic, natural way than the other two couples are. He was willing to try out swimming, and Jaclyn seemed to pick up that he wasn't afraid to put himself out there and take a risk of looking stupid or being vulnerable. That's a really attractive trait in a partner. And although I may have been reading too much into it, I felt her gushing about him being a good teacher while they were golfing was code for her saying, "I'm a little vulnerable in this situation, and you are being really nice about it, which increases my trust in you." 

[MsPH]

Davina may have a history of looking for red flags, but you don't even have to look with Sean, they're all over him! He keeps being exactly the kind of guy I thought he was after last week's episode. I don't think he really sees or hears the people around him, because he's too focused on himself. He just wants someone to give him love and attention, but he's not able to reciprocate and show actual interest in the other person. It wasn't just what happened on the sleigh ride, I could give him a pass for that as well, though it did kind of seem like he didn't know how to deal with her emotions so he just ignored her. It's things like not knowing how she drinks her coffee after four days together, not having any comment about Davina's mom being on the ski team with only men, which is pretty fascinating, and asking her what her most romantic date had been just as a setup for his cheesy line. It's all about him and when she says something unrelated to him he blanks her. So annoying! If that makes her needy then most people are needy. Maybe that's why Sean used to be an outcast.

 

Ryan D is a total dick. There are plenty of people who think facial piercings and "tramp stamps" are trashy, but 1) you don't say that to someone you supposedly care about who has them, 2) he needs to take a good long look in the mirror! He's hardly some classy sophisticated guy himself. I felt so bad for Jessica, when she told him that her ex's parents didn't think she was good enough for him and you could read it on his face that he felt exactly the same way about her. I'm not buying anything that comes out of his mouth, because his actions say something else. I've yet to see any sign that he actually cares about her. He's mostly just complaining about her being a chicken and sensitive, while she's trying her best to make him happy. Run, Jessica!

 

Ryan R and Jaclyn are my favourites by far. They at least both seem capable of caring about another person and are somewhat sane all around. Ryan is a good guy and Jaclyn can see it. That's a great start really. Seeing the good in each other and focusing on that is what it's all about. I like how he took some control back with the golfing. She was clearly impressed.

Edited April 8, 2015 by MsPH

[Liberty]

Lots of good points so far!

 

Davina will be happy when her partner can read her mind, she seems to think she is a trophy.  Sean will be happy when no one challenges his opinion of himself.

 

Ryan D is a bully and hides this with "It's a joke", "It's just me" blah blah blah.  Jessica is really nice and wants to be engaged in his life, while he wants her to idolize him.  (It's okay for me to have tattoos but not you).  Hope he can get this straightened out.

 

I hope Jaclyn comes around, Ryan is really working hard and being patient with her.  She has a lot to offer, but seems afraid.  Too bad she did not know how the other too marriages were going.

[bichonblitz]

 

Davina talking about her old date then crying about Sean using a cheesy line and backing off is weird. On top of other issues, this chick is crazy needy. Red flag. Major red flag. I can see why her friends said this thing was going to fail. I don't think she is ready for a serious relationship, she isn't a happy person who is happy with her life and who is happy experiencing it. She is damaged goods and until she fixes that crap in her life and her mental makeup she will never be ready for someone to be in her life as a partner. hyper-needy and overly defensive. Not marriage material.

 

 

ITA. Damaged goods is a perfect description of Davina. She is exhausting. If she is expecting any man to be perfectly tuned in to her "sensitive" side, it isn't going to happen. Men are not wired that way. You have to spell things out for them, can't leave them to guess what is going on in your head because they are no good at it. And stop crying. She did admit she always is looking for a letdown so at least she's aware of it. 

 

Ryan D is a bully and hides this with "It's a joke", "It's just me" blah blah blah.  Jessica is really nice and wants to be engaged in his life, while he wants her to idolize him.  (It's okay for me to have tattoos but not you).  Hope he can get this straightened out.

 

 

He is a man child. Not ready for marriage yet, he has some growing up to do and is lacking the sensitivity chip. He is 28, right? Some guys are not mature enough for marriage until they are well in to their 30's and that's ok since they don't have a biological clock to worry about. I think he did this to be on the show only. He still has some partying left to do. 

[Neurochick]

I think most of these people should have gone to therapy before starting this process.

 

They have to remember that they don't know each other.  How can Sean know what Davina was feeling if he doesn't know her?  How can Davina think Sean is cold when she doesn't know him?  It takes time to tune in to each other's feelings.  

 

We really don't know what happened regarding the piercing conversation between Ryan D and Jessica, because the cameras didn't catch it, it was just from Jessica's POV, so there is bias.  Now, Ryan shouldn't have said he thought piercings looked trashy after he saw Jessica had one, you can think that, but he shouldn't have said that.  Ryan D is a child, he's not ready for marriage.  He still cares too much what his friends think.  I once knew an elderly couple where the wife had never been the husband's priority; it was sad to me, but she knew that about him and accepted it.  That was because when they married, men and women were looking for different things; she said she wanted a man who was a provider, she wasn't looking for a man to be her friend; both of them had their own friends and that was fine with them.  Different strokes for different folks.

 

I like Ryan R and Jaclyn, I think they might be the couple to make it, which is very interesting because many times people rely on chemistry and this is a case where Jaclyn had no chemistry with Ryan at first, but I can see it building.

 

ITA. Damaged goods is a perfect description of Davina. She is exhausting. If she is expecting any man to be perfectly tuned in to her "sensitive" side, it isn't going to happen. Men are not wired that way. You have to spell things out for them, can't leave them to guess what is going on in your head because they are no good at it. And stop crying. She did admit she always is looking for a letdown so at least she's aware of it.

 

 

I agree with this.  People are wired differently.  I think Davina is one of those people who always looks for things to go wrong, always waits for the other shoe to drop.  If you look for something to go wrong, something will go wrong, because that is life.  

Edited April 8, 2015 by Neurochick

[JapMo]

"Ryan was being a total jerk on the honeymoon.  It's called a compromise.  He might want to go fast on the jet ski, but Jessica doesn't.  How about addressing Jessica's needs?  Be a gentleman.  And you know he knew he was being a jackass to Jessica by calling her piercing and tattoo trashy, but he didn't want to admit he was wrong and he made it all about him.  He's a very selfish person and Jessica should RUN from this relationship."

 

No, Jessica should not RUN from this relationship.  It's a marriage.  You don't bail the minute you're husband turns into a jerk (otherwise EVERY bride would run, LOL).   

[CindyBee]

 

Ryan R and Jaclyn are my favourites by far. They at least both seem capable of caring about another person and are somewhat sane all around. Ryan is a good guy and Jaclyn can see it. That's a great start really. Seeing the good in each other and focusing on that is what it's all about. I like how he took some control back with the golfing. She was clearly impressed.

 

Ryan & Jaclyn are my favorites too and agree that she was really impressed with him when they hit the links.  It gave him a chance to be "in charge" but not in an annoying way and she was able to see him as an active, athletic guy who has confidence when he's in his comfort zone.  Confident Ryan is a pretty sexy guy and that showed up when they hit the beach and she was pretty receptive to frolicking around in the surf with him!

 

Their slow, steady courtship has been an interesting take on this "social experiment" and I look forward to seeing just how close they become as they are building a pretty solid base on their honeymoon. 

[Racj82]

Man, I'm just on a different wavelength then most of you guys.

 

At the end of the day, I feel like every single thing these people do are analyzed too much. I do have some problems with some of the acts done by participants here but pretty much none of it is as heavy as it's being seen here (IMO)

 

Every time a guy jokes around on this show, they are labeled a jerk/asshole. I mean, I think people area allowed to joke around and not be so serious. Yes, Ryan needs to reel it back in some. You can joke around but learn to read your better. I just don't think he's being a asshole because of this. As far as him getting up from the table, I didn't like it but sometimes you just need to break off from a conversation before things get too heated. I'll judge by how they address it later. People get heated in the moment sometimes. Especially when you feel like you are not being heard (they both seemed to feel that way in that conversation). And the person who ask why him and Jessica didn't do anything she wanted to do. They did. That's what the swimming with the dolphins was. She said it was her turn. She got it without argument. Of course, there are some warning signs you should have in a mate to protect yourself. But, this also a thing (IMO) where every little action isn't a example of a bigger issue. Also, no I don't hold it against the experts if these two don't work out. Sometimes, what seems good on paper, doesn't work out in reality. Even by "experts".

 

I have failed to see how Sean is a creeper over and over again. Maybe he has a higher desire to have sex with Davina than the situation warrants. But, everything about these relationships are accelerated at this point. I can understand people on the show moving two steps too fast. He seemed to understand and be respectful later on. Also, the man can't read minds. He read the moment when she cried wrong. Doesn't make an ass or distant. Again, she aired her issues out and it was settled. Communication. It works.

 

Jaclyn has been growing on me. That couple could still use more communication though. I don't think Ryan knows her dating past enough to know how to navigate it and he hasn't been clear enough on just how much there Bro-friendship is turning him off. I think they are on the right track though. I think a lot of the best relationships don't have that the whole lust at first sight thing going on. It gives you something to build towards. Also makes the connection less shallow. I'm not saying you shouldn't be attracted to your mate. But, I also don't think being obsessed with an instant attraction leads to a great dating life either.

 

Also, these people have been together for days. Not weeks. Not months. Not years. Learning each others quirks, personalities, desires are things that are learned. I can be a jokester at times with women (not to Ryan's degree but still). But, with time I had to learn who I can joke with, what I can joke about, etc. With some people, we joke around all the time. We know it's just jokes but not everyone works that way. But, it doesn't make you evil if you don't get it right away. Not learning and reading the people around you is the real issue. Hopefully, Ryan D, Sean and Jaclyn learn this as time goes on ( I believe Sean and Jaclyn are already learning this lesson).

[Neurochick]

Every time a guy jokes around on this show, they are labeled a jerk/asshole. I mean, I think people area allowed to joke around and not be so serious. Yes, Ryan needs to reel it back in some. You can joke around but learn to read your better. I just don't think he's being a asshole because of this. As far as him getting up from the table, I didn't like it but sometimes you just need to break off from a conversation before things get too heated. I'll judge by how they address it later. People get heated in the moment sometimes. Especially when you feel like you are not being heard (they both seemed to feel that way in that conversation). And the person who ask why him and Jessica didn't do anything she wanted to do. They did. That's what the swimming with the dolphins was. She said it was her turn. She got it without argument. Of course, there are some warning signs you should have in a mate to protect yourself. But, this also a thing (IMO) where every little action isn't a example of a bigger issue. Also, no I don't hold it against the experts if these two don't work out. Sometimes, what seems good on paper, doesn't work out in reality. Even by "experts".

I have failed to see how Sean is a creeper over and over again. Maybe he has a higher desire to have sex with Davina than the situation warrants. But, everything about these relationships are accelerated at this point. I can understand people on the show moving two steps too fast. He seemed to understand and be respectful later on. Also, the man can't read minds. He read the moment when she cried wrong. Doesn't make an ass or distant. Again, she aired her issues out and it was settled. Communication. It works.

 

 

I kind of agree with this.  These people haven't known each other for very long.  It takes time to understand the other person's habits and ways.  Some people, when they cry, don't want anyone to touch them; so Sean had no way of knowing what Davina wanted.  Someone once told me, no one is psychic, you have to tell them what you want.  I work with someone like that, she expects me to know what she's feeling and such, how can I know unless you OPEN YOUR MOUTH.  

 

No, Jessica should not RUN from this relationship.  It's a marriage.  You don't bail the minute you're husband turns into a jerk (otherwise EVERY bride would run, LOL).

 

 

And I totally agree with this.  Ryan D's a little boy.  He wants to look cool for his friends.  I do agree with him getting up from the table.  Why talk to someone who doesn't want to listen to you.  Jessica heard what she heard.  Ryan might have said, "those look trashy" and Jessica might have heard, "you look trashy."  One thing I have learned is that sometimes people don't hear what the person is saying; they hear what the tapes inside their head are saying, they're hearing what they think the other person is saying; that's why in things like couples and family therapy, a therapist will say, "what did you hear?"  Just to make sure you really heard what that person said and not what your think they said.

[janerazor]

I have failed to see how Sean is a creeper over and over again. Maybe he has a higher desire to have sex with Davina than the situation warrants. But, everything about these relationships are accelerated at this point. I can understand people on the show moving two steps too fast. He seemed to understand and be respectful later on. 

 

Sean's conversation about sex during the couple's massage made him appear creepy. It's one thing to talk about sex in front of the television audience. We tuned into this show and know going in that sexual issues are going to come up. It's another thing altogether to talk about sex so graphically in front of two people (the ones giving the massages) who may or may not have been comfortable with the conversation. And "Are you noisy during sex?" is a pretty graphic question. To me, his steering the conversation this way felt like a deliberate attempt at being, in a way, shocking and sexual in front of the other two women. It just felt like it was a conversation he was looking to take gratification in and he didn't care how the conversation may have felt to Davina or the other two women.

[MsPH]

I fail to see the difference between saying facial piercings and lower back tattoos are trashy and calling her piercing and tattoo trashy. Same thing to me. Insulting to her and telling of his attitude. I also tend to trust her word more, because he strikes me as the kind of guy who'll deny deny deny regardless of what really happened. Wouldn't be surprised if he turned out to be a cheater too.

[Gigi43]

In the FYI extended version was there any of the Jessica/Ryan exchange where she actually showed him the pictures? On the A&E one they were in the restaurant and Jessica voiced-over what had happened. I would have liked to see that for my self. I do think Jessica is maybe over sensitive however, Ryan is also a jerk. She seems easily swayed too, like in the hot tub it seemed like a little affaction and she let Ryan get away with his terribleness during the day. But she was still mad. I'm not saying at all people should have blowouts, but if you're mad about something, hold on to it until the other person really gets where they went wrong, don't snuggle with them like everything is cool when you've yet to feel like he's entirely deserved forgiveness because that's not going to get it through to him just how bad he was acting, it's giving him a pass at least for the time of the cuddles.  

 

What was with Jaclyn saying she hadn't realized how far apart they lived? She was pointing that out at the wedding reception. She's got to know off the dudes and bro's and saying how she wasn't attracted to him (who wants to hear that?! Even if her opinion changes!) However I think she's coming off the best out of the group. She's admitting she may be using the bro-terms too much, and is trying to be mindful of that kind of thing even though she might not be succedding. No, Ryan R, you do not have too Christmas shop with your brother! Guess what, people grow up. Things change because of growing up, what you and your sibligns. I get really wanting to be there for his niece, because that's actually important. Christmas shopping with your sibling on a certain day is what you do when neither of you have other obligations/families of your own, unless maybe it's the only day of the year you can see each other for some reason. Really this situation should be easy, Jaclyn has that family thing one night (I may be a little bias because I'm half Italian and yeah Christmas Eve is the bigger deal for my fam) and it's the next morning that should be more important to Ryan to be with his family. Two brothers shopping doesn't compare with either. That's a wad of selfishness on Ryan's part.  This group as a whole seems to really be against giving up more of their individual lives to be married. Was the selection that bad for the "experts" or are the "experts" even worse? 

 

Where did Davina grow up that she's so Manhattan? Davina, Sean just met you, it's entirely possible he might not pick up on how important some things are, because he doesn't know you. Not everything is a personal slight. However, Sean could have handled it better.... and this episode, there was just something very "off" about him. I felt very uneasy just watching him.

[sleekandchic]

For me, Jessica's face told the story. I'm willing to give RyanD the chance to see if he adapts, but I think Jessica already knew as of her honeymoon that the experts made a mistake.

I thought the same way toward Vaughn during Season 1's Honeymoon episode. He was already dissatisfied and made no attempt to adapt or to give the experiment an open-minded chance.

[ramble]

As much of a jerk as Ryan Hair Gel was being Jessica's continued "panic attacks" in the water were wearing me out. If she has a fear of ocean water then she needs to quit agreeing to participate in those activities to show how willing she is to be adventurous with her husband because so far it hasn't worked. If I were Ryan I would see our divergent interests in doing adventuresome things as a bad sign. Also, how come she was okay swimming with the dolphins in the water? I also watched half the show twice due to stupid computer issues & I had the sound off. Jessica felt very on, in an actress sense, when just watching with no sound. My nonprofessional, completely biased opinion, is that these two are both in it for the wrong reasons & are trying far too hard to bask in their 15 minutes. Drama & storyline & emotional expressions on cue & as needed. Blech.

The Davina & Sean stuff has already been covered. She's expecting him to know her like they actually dated before marriage & he isn't treating this as anything different than a casual yet long get to know you style date. I feel like she's holding out hope for deep connection & he's holding out hope for sex.

Ryan Weird Teeth & Jaclyn are surprising me in how I'm warming to them. They seem almost real for a reality show. I think the distance they live apart may be a big issue & his insistence that his Christmas traditions can't be changed sounds unreasonable to me. I guess we'll see if they handle things like adults or devolve into standard reality TV drama mode.

Edited April 8, 2015 by ramble

[Primetimer]

The couples experience a shake-up in the awfulness rankings as their romantic honeymoons wear on.

Read the story

[CindyBee]

For me, Jessica's face told the story. I'm willing to give RyanD the chance to see if he adapts, but I think Jessica already knew as of her honeymoon that the experts made a mistake.

 

 

There's a preview clip for next week's episode up on the A&E website where the look on Jessica's face is very telling, like "WTF did I get myself into" when she's talking about having to walk around on eggshells when around Ryan.    Contrast that with Jaclyn admitting to having a crush on her Ryan now that the honeymoon is over with and we have two marriages going in the opposite direction real quick like and I don't know at this point if Jessica is going to want to try very hard to make things work.

[SaucyMommy]

Cindy do you have a link for that preview?

[CindyBee]

Cindy do you have a link for that preview?

 

http://www.aetv.com/married-at-first-sight/video/preview-the-holidays

[Snarklepuss]

Davina may have a history of looking for red flags, but you don't even have to look with Sean, they're all over him! He keeps being exactly the kind of guy I thought he was after last week's episode. I don't think he really sees or hears the people around him, because he's too focused on himself. He just wants someone to give him love and attention, but he's not able to reciprocate and show actual interest in the other person. It wasn't just what happened on the sleigh ride, I could give him a pass for that as well, though it did kind of seem like he didn't know how to deal with her emotions so he just ignored her. It's things like not knowing how she drinks her coffee after four days together, not having any comment about Davina's mom being on the ski team with only men, which is pretty fascinating, and asking her what her most romantic date had been just as a setup for his cheesy line. It's all about him and when she says something unrelated to him he blanks her. So annoying! If that makes her needy then most people are needy. Maybe that's why Sean used to be an outcast.

 

I don't think I knew how my husband took his coffee for years into our relationship and we got married young (I was 21, him 23) and have been married for 35 years.  I'm not a coffee drinker and to be honest, in the very beginning of our relationship I was focused on a lot of other things about him that I felt were more important.  That said, my jury is out on Sean as to whether he is too into himself to focus on Davina.  I am wondering if some of his lack of responsiveness to some of what she was telling him is due to the un-natural situation they are in having to get to know each other in front of 20 million Americans on NATIONAL TV.  I have to wonder how this is affecting all of them.  I think it might affect introverts worse than extroverts, for whom "all the world's a stage" anyway and are comfortable doing anything in front of strangers (like Ryan and Jaclyn).  Introverts, being more private people might not feel comfortable enough to "be themselves" in such a high pressure, exposed and almost public situation and might not respond as they normally would unless they were really in private.  Of course, that yucky "public" conversation about sex Sean and Davina were engaging in while being massaged was not quite consistent with that, but I had a feeling that was sort-of staged by the show.

[Neurochick]

I don't like that Sean was talking about sex in front of those masseuses, I thought it was tasteless, but I don't get that it's creepy?  I can't remember if 20 years ago people used "creepy" so much.  Sometimes I think creepy has become one of those buzz words like "abuse" or "bully."  It's fashionable to use it.

[SaucyMommy]

Yeah it wasn't creepy as much as inappropriate

[ElectricCityy]

I don't think Sean is "creepy" but he is super awkward. I was surprised Davina even answered his question. 

[SaucyMommy]

Yes, I agree.  Sean reminds of the guy that got ignored a ton and then grew up in to a handsome dude.  Now he's so into himself that he's forgotten how to take interest in anyone but himself.  Which actually strikes me as odd because he's a nurse.

[MsPH]

Yes, I agree.  Sean reminds of the guy that got ignored a ton and then grew up in to a handsome dude.  Now he's so into himself that he's forgotten how to take interest in anyone but himself.  Which actually strikes me as odd because he's a nurse.

 

Exactly. And the experts keep describing him as nurturing and sensitive and caring, when I haven't really seen any sign of those traits in him. He seems to talk about his own issues and past a lot with tears in his eyes, and Davina's always very empathetic, but when she starts opening up about her past he looks so disinterested and closed off. I wonder if he sees that as a competition too? Like who had the worst childhood. Maybe he likes his role as the victim and the one to be pitied and is threatened by Davina growing up with similar issues. The experts thought they'd bond over their difficult childhoods, but I think the opposite might happen.

Edited April 8, 2015 by MsPH

[Snarklepuss]

I don't like that Sean was talking about sex in front of those masseuses, I thought it was tasteless, but I don't get that it's creepy?  I can't remember if 20 years ago people used "creepy" so much.  Sometimes I think creepy has become one of those buzz words like "abuse" or "bully."  It's fashionable to use it.

 

I can't speak for anyone else, but when I say there's something about Sean I find a little creepy it's a visceral reaction and I can't put into words why I feel that way.  It's purely subjective and based on nothing but a gut feeling I get from watching him.  Like I dunno maybe I'm sensing that he's a secret voyeur or cross dresser or something like that.  Of course, I really have no idea what it is about him that would qualify as creepy.  Then again, my ol' stomach has often been onto something before, so I tend to listen to it.

Edited April 8, 2015 by Snarklepuss

[SaucyMommy]

Personally I think both of them are TOO self absorbed to make it work. Davina is so LOOK AT ME.

I can't speak for anyone else, but when I say there's something about Sean I find a little creepy it's a visceral reaction and I can't put into words why I feel that way.  It's purely subjective and based on nothing but a gut feeling I get from watching him.  Like I dunno maybe I'm sensing that he's a secret cross dresser or something like that.  Of course, I really have no idea what it is about him that would qualify as creepy.  Then again, my ol' stomach has often been onto something before, so I tend to listen to it.

 

It's the arm hair that stops mid upper arm that creeps me out :)

[okerry]

I'm actually concerned for Jessica's safety. If nothing else, her psychological and emotional health are taking a beating. Her face reflected inner turmoil.

Last season, I worried for Monet because of Vaughn's asshattery, but this Ryan D guy is much worse to me.

Really, why did he bother with this show? He KNOWS he's not ready for marriage.

I totally agree with you. Those two are becoming disturbing to watch. I want to hear the "experts" justify leaving Jessica with this guy. He's checked out and doesn't want her, but he'll never admit that. He'll just be a huge passive-aggressive asshole and torment her until she blows up and (he hopes) walks out, and then blame her for it not working out.

 

"Ryan was being a total jerk on the honeymoon.  It's called a compromise.  He might want to go fast on the jet ski, but Jessica doesn't.  How about addressing Jessica's needs?  Be a gentleman.  And you know he knew he was being a jackass to Jessica by calling her piercing and tattoo trashy, but he didn't want to admit he was wrong and he made it all about him.  He's a very selfish person and Jessica should RUN from this relationship."

 

No, Jessica should not RUN from this relationship.  It's a marriage.  You don't bail the minute you're husband turns into a jerk (otherwise EVERY bride would run, LOL).   

I will completely disagree with this. Sure, some guys can be kinda stupid sometimes, but this is deliberate bullying and tormenting of Jessica. This guy wants out and he's hoping that if he treats her badly enough, she'll be forced to end it so he doesn't have to. And dear gods, I hope she does/did ASAP.