S01.E02: Series Premiere (2)

[Tara Ariano]

Part 2 of the three-part premiere of a one-year social experiment involving 15 people who try to create their own civilization from scratch by deciding on a system of government, what food they'll eat and how they'll interact with the outside world.

[Wandering Snark]

 

deciding on a system of government, what food they'll eat and how they'll interact with the outside world.

 

Well we've seen that if the s**t gets too deep they have decided that 911 is their go-to response... AND they've been given that cell phone since hey just because you are building your own world you can't be expected to go without a cell phone!

[kikismom]

Just watched the confusion over the chicken tractor and the chicken transporter.

 

The chicken Tardis.

[dogfish]

These people have to be actors playing a role.  No sane person would feel safe going to sleep with a guy as unstable as Dave walking around.  I also don't know many guys that would stand around while Red and Dave (Rave) destroy food and property.  I'm thinking Rave would be locked in a shed until they could be dealt with.

Edited September 10, 2014 by dogfish

[Ceeg]

Why are these men all children? Is this how men act when you take them out of society? Don't get me wrong, the women are insane too. Especially Bella (OMG she had a back-and-forth conversation with herself and called herself "baby"). But the men throw tantrums like they're 3 years old. Actually, the children on Kid Nation threw less tantrums than these grown men.

[dogfish]

Not ALL the men are throwing tantrums.  Mike seems to be pretty level headed and I have not seen Jon or Chris lose it yet.  The women as a whole seem to be pretty flaky.  Wish I could attribute that to their young age, but alas Crazy Bella is 45.

[ElleryAnne]

Dave, about eating canned foods:  "It's okay, I don't want to live forever."

Other utopians:  "Yeah, but we don't want you to die here."

Me:  Take a vote on that.  It may not be unanimous.  Include the production staff in the vote.

 

Bri and Chris, ugh.  They may be the worst stereotypes of the bunch, and that's saying something.

 

The Utopia State of Freedom - you know, if any of these people were halfway sane and serious about this thing, a potential split into two states could be really interesting to watch.  But it's only two incredibly lazy and stupid men trying not to have to work.  And one of them may not want to chew.  

 

For the record, not all poor people think bologna and Doritos are the best way to spend a limited budget.

 

Is Bella really a prepper?  She seems emotionally too fragile to handle....anything.

 

Hex, in spite of her alcohol binge on the first day, is becoming my favorite.  She seems willing to give everyone a chance, and she's not stupid.  How did she ever pass the qualifications for this show?  (Oh, right.  The alcohol binge.)

[Whimsy]

Dave and Red are ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous. They are so infantile that I don't even what to say. They HAVE to be producer plants. I just can't understand why they would think it's ok to waste water (last week) and food (this week).

When Dave was talking about prison food, etc, the group was laughing like he was joking but he was being dead serious.

Bella is straight up whackadoo. I can't believe she told Josh she feels safe around him after what happened before. The funny part was he looked like he didn't feel safe with HER!

I like Hex, too, but I am getting a little sick of her talking about her human form and not understanding why she can't walk around naked. Or is that Dedeker? Honestly, I can't remember one thing Dedeker has said or done so I am wondering if I am getting those two confused.

Oh, and Utopia State of Freedom is the dumbest name ever.

[dogfish]

Yes, that was Hex.  I'm not sure I've heard Dedeker say anything at all.

[kikismom]

Bri and Chris decided their couple name should be bris. Unfortunate word.

[kikismom]

I was so disappointed with how childish Dave and Red were being that I wanted to turn it off; then I got excited that something good was going to happen because Chris figured the hayloft would be a good place to make out. That's supposed to be the part when they discover the barn is full of flesh-eating zombies.

But then this one wasn't and I got sad.

[Wandering Snark]

"That ain't gonna happening" may be my new favorite phrase.

 

I loved the long shot of "The Utopia Stare Of We Don't Do Nuthin' We Dont's Wanna Do" that showed that they were sitting not next to each other but seemingly 50 ft apart.

 

For some "pioneers" the pressing issue is food; others electricity, still others the right to bare bare ass, some just want to know "Where in here can we f**k??". It's really a beautiful thing to observe. *shakes head*

 

Bella is a delusional whackjob to put it mildly, but she's harmless unlike Dave... who is clearly unstable and was rightfully jailed I'd guess. Nice temper...

 

I like that nobody cared that Red, of all people, had opened their safe and busted out their only money.

 

Thank whatever diety they decide upon that the address of "Utopia" is accessible to food delivery... I mean, wow, this thing is such a charade in so many ways...

 

ETA: Was anyone else concerned about why they had to blur our Red's crotch in the scene just before he destroyed their food and wasn't held accountable?

Edited September 10, 2014 by Wandering Snark

[bagatelle]

This was my first time watching the show. I don't know if I will be able to continue, however, I'm just curious… why not buy the guy his ramen noodles? They're cheap, he'll be happy and he'll shut up.

[ottoDbusdriver]

Was anyone else concerned about why they had to blur our Red's crotch in the scene just before he destroyed their food and wasn't held accountable?

 

That was weird -- did Red have a chub-on over the excitement of stomping something ?

[Bubbacat]

According to the live feeds, they did buy ramen noodles. And Dave promptly hid them.

[Auntie Anxiety]

A year?  Fox expects people to watch this for a year?  Just two episodes and I'm barely hanging on.  

Dave is a homicidal maniac and Red is his little prison wife.  

Bella needs her psychotropic medication dosages dialed way up.  

Bris (unfortunate is right, Kikismom) is the most boring couple that ever coupled.  Hope she brought her bug spray to the barn. <yawn>

[Mysteris]

So why don't these people have a way to get rid of lazy violent thieves like Dave and Red? They don't contribute and they steal. Also? Way to go Dave. Way to live down to the stereotype of the ex-con. If you like prison so much, go back!

Bella can't read a room can she? No one was interested in her ranting.

I still don't think they all have much idea what they're doing. Instead of these short-term purchases of food, shouldn't they be buying equipment so they can be self-sufficient? Or at least let Hex out to do some of this hunting she's supposed to be good at. It's good they have electricity now at least.

Still not sure how this is going to last a year. I don't imagine Red or Dave being able to hold back the violence/theft/aggression for a year. Though we may get an entertaining brawl out of it.

Edited September 10, 2014 by Mysteris

[Wandering Snark]

A year?  Fox expects people to watch this for a year?  Just two episodes and I'm barely hanging on.

 

Yeah I know the feeling this was a very draggingly portrayed hour of teevee. It was difficult to watch and not in a way that led to any payoff either.

 

Beside the glaring issues that went on during casting the main problem is that, like Seinfeld would say, it's a show about nothing. There is nothing to hold this show together for a week let alone a year. There is zero structure, nothing to win, nothing to aim for and no goals. It is playing the "sandbox" version of a very complicated game. They need leaders, roles, consequences, dedication to more than being naked and doing whatever the hell you want.

 

And ordering out for weekly/daily groceries? Seriously? Seriously?? That's a classic case of using the "tools" provided to make the whole thing a joke. They're just burning money instead of investing in things that will pay off down the road, hell even buying a refrigerator wouldn't exactly be the most long-view appropriate purchase.

 

Oh and Red... what did radishes ever do to you? As calls to being aggrieved "We're getting f'ing radishes???" doesn't really stand up to say "No taxation without representation" or anything.

Edited September 10, 2014 by Wandering Snark

[Quilt Fairy]

A year?  Fox expects people to watch this for a year?  Just two episodes and I'm barely hanging on

 

When I glanced at the channel guide on Sunday, I thought that it was the 1st of 3 (total) episodes, not the 1st of 3 parts of the premier.

[NoirDetective]

Well, this got gross fast.

My Republican mind couldn't help but smirk that Dave and Red were the types who nearly immediately established themselves as a welfare state. They have no education, and have been rejected by real society for fair reasons. There's no sense arguing with them since they're so stupid. Dave is mental, and will always be in the gutter/jail. Possibly from this show, since they are calling 911, apparently, which is weird.

All this "in MY utopia..." Is bullshit. Don't you want to get along with the other utopians in your utopia and not live in constant conflict? And, there are a dozen other utopian visions floating about. Are you really not prepare to bend at all?

It occurred to me to set up some type of harsh regime to get the undesirables to quit. Not PC, but in MY utopia (heh) we wouldn't be PC. The only way to be happy in this environment is to be in power, I think.

[dogfish]

 

My Republican mind couldn't help but smirk that Dave and Red were the types who nearly immediately established themselves as a welfare state. They have no education, and have been rejected by real society for fair reasons. There's no sense arguing with them since they're so stupid. Dave is mental, and will always be in the gutter/jail.

That's funny and sadly, accurate!  

From what I have seen so far, this has to be a loosely scripted show.

• NONE of the pioneers are particularly worried about establishing a means of income.
• They don't seem worried about where their next meal will come from.
• They are not concerned to be sharing camp with several apparently unbalanced and potentially violent folks.
• As pointed out, not a single person was upset that Rave broke into the safe.
• They have no plan for the next 11 1/2 months.

It's almost as if they realize that they are simply making another TV show and that TPTB will take care of all their needs.

Love to see what happens when they run out of food and money.  Bella's garden ain't gonna cut it.

 

[BusyOctober]

Here is a true comparison of the TV Utopia and my experience of working with a group of strangers for the first time.

 

Yesterday afternoon I met with a new social/volunteer group.  There are 15 of us.  We met for one hour and accomplished the following:

* established guidelines for how we will conduct meetings (wrote up a "Meeting Agreement")

* discussed our goals for the next year and broke it down into smaller milestones

* elected a treasurer and collected dues

* created a list of jobs/tasks we will all share for meeting prep &/or clean up

* agreed what kind of foods/drinks we could bring to avoid allergy or diet concerns

* made adjustments to the meeting room to accommodate a few members' physical needs

 

 

MY Utopia was a Brownie meeting of 13 second grade girls and 2 adult volunteers.

[kikismom]

It occurred to me to set up some type of harsh regime to get the undesirables to quit. Not PC, but in MY utopia (heh) we wouldn't be PC. The only way to be happy in this environment is to be in power, I think.

My strategy at this point in the experiment would be this:

Get control of this shitstorm by topping it with a bigger better shitstorm.

• I would go out at night and make grizzly bear footprints around the camp. I could easily make a template out of spare materials. Keep the footprints out at the edges of the area at first; not too suspicious, and let someone else "discover" them. Don't try to convince anyone, just shrug when the inevitable argument starts about what kind of prints they are and what to do.
• After doing that for a few days, moving prints slightly closer each night, bring out the old deer-camp trick: Take a tin can (there are some empty ones now! The bigger ones work best) and punch a hole in the bottom with a screwdriver (which they have). Wet a shoelace and put one end through the hole.
• Sneak out at 2 a.m. into the wooded area or rocks or behind the barn. Pull the lace slowly through the hole. When you do this with a Number 10 can it makes a sound like "OOAAARRROOUUUMMMMGG". The faster or slower you pull gives special effects! Sneak back to bed.
• When others wake everyone up "What the hell was that?!" , you rub you "sleepy" eyes and say "it's a squirrel." Let them declare it's a bear/mountain lion/velociraptor.
• The next night move it closer. Also fun to do in daytime by the latrine or showers!
• Always feign complete innocence.

This usually gets the frauds and whiners to quit and go home. Quickly use the opportunity to set up a leadership structure, assignments etc based on "safety" concerns (mwahaha).

(Can make fun times at least. Gotta be more fun than this "pickled horseradish rich people this means war!" gibberish.

[dogfish]

kikismom - you must have been a lot of fun at summer camp! :)

 

As much as it pains me to admit this, I sort of agree with Rave when it comes to the food.  The "pioneers" have a limited budget...if they can buy 10 lbs of white rice for the same price as 2 lbs of brown, buy white.  Radishes...seriously?  Not exactly the best use of your food dollars (not that they have established any kind of budget.)  I would be buying the basic "chuck wagon" sorts of foods - beans, rice, carrots, flour, butter, etc.  Even Ramen noodles (inexpensive) will fill more bellies than organic quinoa and baby endive.  YMMV

[ghoulina]

Dave and Red - they are ridiculous. Did they not understand the premise of this show? It's not called "MY Utopia"? It wasn't designed so two dudes who get along can just hang out on their own little compound, drinking whiskey and eating Ramen noodles. The point is to put different people together and see how they work out their differences and compromise when it comes to building a society. Those two just have no interest in doing any of that. They may have some valid points (I agree about ordering produce when they could be growing it), but they have absolutely no ability to have a mature, rational conversation with anyone. They are too rigid, too selfish, and too hot-headed.  It just instantly goes to screaming and breaking things. What a hot mess. 

 

I do want "I don't want no pickled horse radishes" on a t-shirt now. 

 

And is Red carrying around a tea pot everywhere he goes? Is that where he keeps his whiskey? 

 

Bella drives me crazy as well. She has a lot of knowledge and skill, but she just comes across as incredibly bossy and condescending. She wants to control everything, or she's going to have a breakdown. Probably not the right show for you either, honey. 

 

So what's up with the power line? Do they just have unlimited electric now, and Fox will foot the bill? Yawn. And I can't believe someone is asking for a computer! I wanted to see people get creative with how they're going to survive in this place; I don't want to watch a bunch of idiots playing Solitaire all day long. 

[ghoulina]

Is Bella really a prepper?  She seems emotionally too fragile to handle....anything.

 

Well, the shit hasn't hit the fan yet. She seems like the perfect pre-SHTF prepper. She's neurotic and controlling, she probably has an awesome set-up and stockpile at home. But yea, once the shit actually DOES hit the fan, nothing will be in control anymore and she'll melt faster than Frosty on a summer day. 

 

I was so disappointed with how childish Dave and Red were being that I wanted to turn it off; then I got excited that something good was going to happen because Chris figured the hayloft would be a good place to make out. That's supposed to be the part when they discover the barn is full of flesh-eating zombies.

But then this one wasn't and I got sad.

 

I love you forever! I thought the same thing. I was expecting Chris to come up to the group and say, "The barn is full of walkers and Amanda's pregnant". 

[dogfish]

 

And is Red carrying around a tea pot everywhere he goes? Is that where he keeps his whiskey?

No doubt.  I truly believe that this is Red's audition tape for future "reality" shows (he's already done one on cannabis growers).  He's got his schtick and I bet he thinks it will go a long way towards getting him on Survivor or BB.  How about Red and Dave (Rave) as partners on The Amazing Race...that would be awesome!!

[kikismom]

Dave and Red - they are ridiculous. Did they not understand the premise of this show? It's not called "MY Utopia"? It wasn't designed so two dudes who get along can just hang out on their own little compound, drinking whiskey and eating Ramen noodles. The point is to put different people together and see how they work out their differences and compromise when it comes to building a society. Those two just have no interest in doing any of that. They may have some valid points (I agree about ordering produce when they could be growing it), but they have absolutely no ability to have a mature, rational conversation with anyone. They are too rigid, too selfish, and too hot-headed.  It just instantly goes to screaming and breaking things. What a hot mess. 

 

I do want "I don't want no pickled horse radishes" on a t-shirt now. 

 

And is Red carrying around a tea pot everywhere he goes? Is that where he keeps his whiskey? 

 

Bella drives me crazy as well. She has a lot of knowledge and skill, but she just comes across as incredibly bossy and condescending. She wants to control everything, or she's going to have a breakdown. Probably not the right show for you either, honey. 

 

 

Agreed; they don't seem to understand what the word "Utopia" means (among the many words they don't know the meaning of - did you hear "the more I'm indulged in the Bible" ),and they forgot about "building a society".

Maybe Red carries a Neti-pot to clear his sinuses every morning. Or maybe he has a genie.

I liked when Bella said "I have something to say! Everybody be quiet! This needs to be discussed so please listen!" and when they go silent she says "Now I'm going to go away and get my head together before I talk."

No one, ever, should choose a chef to make the grocery list. Let him/her cook, but don't let them buy. If they were all trapped down a coal mine with a phone he'd be ordering I'll take 1 cup of fair-trade baby mung sprouts picked by Tibetan monks high on a windy hill with just a hint of mint.

Which reminds me of another 70's classic song: Timothy. Wasn't that a great record?

[dogfish]

 

Which reminds me of another 70's classic song: Timothy. Wasn't that a great record?

Written by Mister Pina Colada himself.  They should have called it What We Gonna Do About Tim?

If they keep spending their money the way they are, TIMOTHY might be the answer!  :)

[rlc]

How do you expect me to eat some radishes with no teeth?

[ramble]

There's no sense arguing with them since they're so stupid

And you can't fix stupid.

[ghoulina]

Or maybe he has a genie.

 

Wouldn't that be nice? Then he could just wish up whatever he wanted and not spend hours arguing about radishes vs. Ramen.

[DeLurker]

 

MY Utopia was a Brownie meeting of 13 second grade girls and 2 adult volunteers.

Clearly you will fail to properly prepare these impressionable children for a future in reality tv. 

[Primetimer]

Instead of resolving division of resources and division of labor, two Utopians opt for simple division.

Read the story

[Canada]

Actually, Hex, it's not organised religion that decided public nudity is wrong.  I'm an atheist and I don't want to see your tits or ass.  So, you need to grow up and come up with a new theory.  With emphasis on the 'grow up' part.  And maybe some of your goddesses can join you in that!

 

I really have no words for how stupid these people are.  And it's not even entertaining stupid.

[BusyOctober]

Clearly you will fail to properly prepare these impressionable children for a future in reality tv. 

I just checked the handbook, and thankfully there is no badge for "Future Fame Whore"...yet

[North of Eden]

I believe with this show we might see the first actual murder of a reality show contestant. Seriously how are these people going to live together for a year without killing each other.

 

Bri is cute but I don't get why the rocker guy wouldn't want to be with Minnie Driver...I mean Yoga Doctor. She's all kinds of hot. Hexness Everdeen is cute in her own way and the whole six foot thing is intriquing.

 

The show seems unpopular here but I like it...it's like a pure form of BIG BROTHER without Allison Grodner manipulating silly contests to keep her favorites around. I hope it lasts...but I could do without the host dressed up like a Johnny Depp character.

[jumper sage]

OMG!  I could just copy and paste this whole page.  Everything you all said and:

 

Bella - What a loony tune.  On the first episode and that guy ran out of the meeting house yelling, "Shut the fuck up".  I was yelling the same thing at home and will continue to do so each time she starts her stupid rants.  Even those with just herself.  She knows all about chickens except that by moving them constantly they will not lay eggs.  How stupid can she be.  Why do the need a chicken transport.  Can't she just carry them?

 

Dave + Red = Rave - OMG!  Poor people food vs. rich people food?  Hilarious.  Ripping off the safe?  I am all in on this.  Sign me up for that t shirt order.

 

Bris - Now Bri, your whole family knows you fucked in a barn with a guy who will toss you at first chance all whilst having stepped in cow shit.  Lovely!

 

Preacher guy - Don't even care to know your name.  Hate it that you feel the need to start a nation born on the principles of Christianity, blah blah blah.  I know why these other idiots are able to take a year off of the their life and you are just as lame as they are.

 

Pregnant girl - are you a complete idiot?  Your poor baby.

 

Hex - shout out from Detroit - hey girl.  Do not make us embarrassed for you.

[kikismom]

. Hexness Everdeen is cute in her own way and the whole six foot thing is intriquing.

 

 

She's kinda cute but does she have cheek implants? (besides the other kind of implants).

She just looks like in maybe 10 years her face will get that "Bride of WIldenstein" thing happening.

[Bubbacat]

And is Red carrying around a tea pot everywhere he goes?

 

I'm thinkin' it's not so much tea as pot.

[In Pog Form]

Bri and Chris decided their couple name should be bris. Unfortunate word.

I prefer Chri.

Which is also the response I have to this awful, awful show.

[Auntie Anxiety]

From one of the trade papers:

Not good: Fox’s Utopia ratings dropped through the floor last night.
It was only the second episode of Fox’s big reality gamble, yet ratings fell 55 percent to a mere 2.5 million viewers and a 0.9 rating among adults 18-49.

 

What's the over-under on when this show will be cancelled?

When this show goes off the air next week, I'll have to focus my snark on Love Prison (A&E has outdone itself), which makes The Bachelor look highbrow.

[ghoulina]

Wow. That's bad. I don't think I've ever watched a show that was cancelled while it was airing. This would be a first. 

[Wandering Snark]

Sounds like they succeeded with their wide-based advertising in drawing a good viewership; but with this being the product the 'coyote over the cliff' like 2nd eppy viewership was to be expected. But yeah a viewers loss of 55% is pretty impressive!

[hincandenza]

Yeah, I'm rather reluctantly in for a few more episodes (which might be all it has; I feel so bad for the people who worked for no doubt weeks to build that whole compound, stock it with all sorts of useful plant life, and all for a show that could have been good if the casting director hadn't shit the bed), because I won't pretend I wasn't at least marginally entertained last night. "Rave" are actually like real-life versions of the Trailer Park Boys, which I'd just finished watching the most recent season of on Netflix.  Except they're both Rickys.  I guess maybe Rob would be the Julian, and I don't know who Bubbles would be.

 

I compare this to say Face Off which I also watched last night, and it's night-and-day how having competent, stable people versus moronic fame whores can dramatically increase a show's watchability.  We're all too savvy as TV watchers to be amused by stupidity endlessly, having seen it so much.  There's NO way people are going to Truman Show this thing for a whole year, or even three months.  The people aren't likable, there's no challenge/plot involved in terms of eliminations or contests, so it's just "Would you watch imbeciles slowly starve to death while attacking each other in more and more physical ways until one of them hospitalizes or even kills another?".  It's like the show thought it would recapture that original Survivor ratings magic, but took away all the half-decent parts of Survivor and this is what we're left with: people "surviving" (for now) using cell phones to order food.  Christ, that's boring.  If this were "Pioneer House" or something similar, I'd be in.  If they had key goals in the forefront for them to achieve in self-sustainability- striving to get the plumbing and electricity working, or getting a food source going in the compound- that were a vital part of the plot, with producer rewards when they reach certain milestones- it could have been entertaining and even a little educational.  But... no.  This show is dumb.  And I'll watch a few more out of morbid curiousity, but I and those paltry few still watching will tune out soon enough.

 

These people are terrifyingly, profoundly stupid; I literally believe both Dave and Red are suffering from not only undiagnosed mental illnesses but are medically speaking moderately developmentally disabled.  Oreos and ramen, really?  Stealing money (and no one kicked the shit out of them?!?), causing tension, ranting and raving, and never helping out with basic chores.  That whole separatist thing was comedy gold, if it weren't so sad.

 

And Bella... wow, I said yesterday after watching the Sunday premiere that she was a mess, but she's REALLY a mess; I didn't think I would actually underestimate her madness.  My god, the woman is a wreck, and I can only feel pity that she's 45, probably obsesses about not dying childless and alone, but... she does not have the tools to make people like her.  She's bossy, manic, hyperdramatic, and never listens to anyone.  She is as unlikeable in her way as Dave and Red are in theirs.

 

And Rob was a real piece of work too; I think it's clear that he is just as unhinged as the rest, but held it together just a couple of days longer.  His work/lazy rampage was as explosive as his stomping out during the Josh "trial", and shows he's one of those people who like to talk about how everyone else is stupid, everyone else is lazy, everyone else is a mooch... while he is stupid, lazy, and mooching off the hard work of others.

 

Speaking of which, during that scene Josh came over with the "Um, yeah... we really want electricity, and we can get it tonight if people help" and I realized he's in danger of becoming Grace Mulligan in Lars von Trier's "Dogville".  Basically, the 'town' has allowed him to stay 'on probation', so I guess he's now the designated physical workhorse, required to bust ass while everyone else lays around because they aren't the "bad people" like he is.  It's hard to believe Josh is actually looking fairly reasonable despite his drunken antics at this point.

 

I do like Hex more than I did initially, although she's still a bit of that hippy-flaky-logic challenged type that is a bit grating on me.  Still, I think she's fairly attractive and not manly or cheek-implanted, and she does at least attempt to be mature and understanding in her dealings with people.  That practically makes her Gandhi or MLK here in Utopia.  The quieter people, like Mike, Dede, even Chris and Bri, etc, seem fairly reasonable and thus aren't getting as much TV time, but we will see...

 

Beyond that... shit, I had more thoughts last night while watching, but who really cares?  They are mostly broken people with a few sane ones who are probably wondering what the hell they've signed up for; FOX casting at its worst.  Or best, depending on your schadenfreude. 

 

The show's design is fatally flawed in a way that a casual TV watcher could have predicted long before shooting began.  The format and editing are boring, because while the hijinks are passably distracting, they wear off quickly and then you're left asking "Why would the producers not get Rave the hell out of there before they have a nightmare situation?". 

 

They need a reality show Surgeon to come in and do a quick and urgent patch on this thing:

 

• Add in competitions with clear goals; instead of some nebulous "earn money from the outside" they should have challenges that require cooperation *or* competition, to win individual or community prizes, or accrue fake dollars spendable towards necessities, appliances/tools, and food/luxuries (like those Scholastic book sales when we were in school).  So they have enough there to get by/survive if they work hard and learn the land, but the competitions help them get a leg up.
• Related to the above, these challenges should be real and survival based; not some ring toss or Survivor memory puzzle, but almost like a video game/Sim where you have to level up your skills/tools by achieving things.  Build a working electrical grid?  Get a microwave!  Build working plumbing?  Get a 24-pack of toilet paper and other toiletries.  That sort of thing.
• Possibly some incentive for staying: the $1000/week stipend, if that's what it is, is $52,000/year at most- to stay away from your friends and family for 365 days.  That's... not much, for that sacrifice.  It doesn't have to be winner take all, either, but something like the challenges above lead to earning community money for surviving/lasting/achieving key goals. 
• Related to the above, of course how they distribute that prize money... well, that's part of the more interesting drama than what we're seeing. :)  You could use mechanisms like meaningful prize money (say, $25,000/week) is up for grabs for completing challenges.  The prize money is then voted on to be banked in part or full, with whoever is there that week getting either 1/n of the total prize money to their external "pay out" when they leave the show, or some voted one larger/smaller proportion (drama!).  Whatever they don't bank, they can choose to spend on necessities (at some inflated rate, no doubt), but once they bank it, they can't get it back.
• They really should have had a shorter overall schedule (3 or maybe 4 months instead of a year is far more reasonable for both Utopians and the viewers).  Plus, a shorter schedule means more people can commit, which means a better pool of non-crazies to choose from. 
• More options for volatility in casting: apparently the next episode has two people showing up, only one of whom stays.  How about this: have two added each week, with the community voting out one person from the overall group?  This gives the community a chance to quickly weed out "undesirables" more often than once a month- and makes people have an incentive to be at least civil- while also adding the challenge of a steadily growing community.  As the community goes from 14 to 15 to 16 to... 23, 24, etc, how will the community handle it?  Will they fracture into tribes?  Will they be able to handle division of labor and the switch to specialization with hurt feelings?  Will resentment grow over imbalances of work done?
• More educational!  This will sound odd, especially for a FOX show, but actually the audience would probably like to learn more, casually, about how to survive off the grid.  We can laugh at the "chicken tractor", and it is kind of dumb for this time and place, but the excellent book "The Omnivore's Dilemma" gave a great example of the Polyface Farm that uses rotating, symbiotic animal sections for natural farming: cattle, chickens, pigs, rabbits, etc all take turns on sections of land thanks to a rotating, movable fence.  Each animal contributes to the health of the land: the cattle eat by grazing, the chicken eat the flies from the manure while scratching that manure around (this is probably what Bella is really thinking, not a 20-man chicken tractor turning up 6 inches of topsoil); etc, etc.  We could get snippets of that kind of info in various fashion, such as showing us common plants that maybe have medicinal properties, the next time someone gets a headache.  Not overdone, just enough to get people curious and interested on *how* you'd survive "off the grid" like this.

 

That's just a start, and hey producers: you can have those ideas for free. 

 

Overall, this dumb show has no point, and it could have been better.  But somehow, I'm sure this thing will still run longer than Firefly did, even thought it inevitably will be canceled abruptly when no one is left tuning in.

Edited September 12, 2014 by hincandenza

[ottoDbusdriver]

"Rave" are actually like real-life versions of the Trailer Park Boys, which I'd just finished watching the most recent season of on Netflix.  Except they're both Rickys.  I guess maybe gun nut Rob would be the Julian, and I don't know who Bubbles would be.

 

 

Nice !!!

 

 

These people are terrifyingly, profoundly stupid; I literally believe both Dave and Red are suffering from not only undiagnosed mental illnesses but are medically speaking moderately developmentally disabled.  Oreos and ramen, really?  Stealing money (and no one kicked the shit out of them?!?), causing tension, ranting and raving, and never helping out with basic chores.  That whole separatist thing was comedy gold, if it weren't so sad.

 

 

It's almost like there were no psych evaluations at all as part of the casting process.

[Auntie Anxiety]

 

took away all the half-decent parts of Survivor and this is what we're left with: people "surviving" (for now) using cell phones to order food.

I considered asking Fox if they wanted to film me using the phone to order my pizza for tonight's dinner.  

[kaygeeret]

hincandenza for Showrunner!!!!!!!

[kikismom]

I see we differ on the cheek implant possibility :-D

Supposedly Hex quit her job as a dental technician months before the show began to "work on her hunting skills and hunting laws." (hunting laws?)

 

I'm just cynical enough to think the producers wanted a Katniss/female Daryl Dixon type for the show before casting even began. Because.

 

I really would not be surprised if her whole deal is created; she's using a fake name (supposedly so she doesn't embarrass her family) and is supposed to be a hunting fishing and foraging expert from Detroit.

 

I'll go out on a limb here, and say it will be revealed after the show is done that she was chosen for looks and willingness to be the Huntress persona they wanted, and that she spent those unemployed months learning how to use a crossbow (I hit the target! From three feet away! Yay me!) and possibly some other prep.

 

It wouldn't be the first reality show to do that, and with the plan for the show to last a year it would be a comparatively small investment to attempt hooking the all-important 18-34 year old viewer demographic. I'm betting it blows up in their faces.

[Kris117]

Oh, and Utopia State of Freedom is the dumbest name ever.

I'm thinking they could call themselves U-stupi-a.

 

 

No doubt.  I truly believe that this is Red's audition tape for future "reality" shows (he's already done one on cannabis growers).  He's got his schtick and I bet he thinks it will go a long way towards getting him on Survivor or BB.  How about Red and Dave (Rave) as partners on The Amazing Race...that would be awesome!!

 

I can see it now. During their first day in a foreign country, Dave and Red would get arrested for egregiously offending the entire populace of the country they're in. The army would need to be sent in to save Dave and Red from a lynching mob. TAR would say, "Gosh, we tried super hard to get them out of jail, but those Canadian judges are harsh." They would never be heard from again.

Actually, Hex, it's not organised religion that decided public nudity is wrong.  I'm an atheist and I don't want to see your tits or ass.  So, you need to grow up and come up with a new theory.  With emphasis on the 'grow up' part.  And maybe some of your goddesses can join you in that!

I can see the point they're making in part—culturally, naked male chests are fine, but naked female chests are taboo, and capable of inflaming the populace. They're the same parts, with just some fat added in the female. However, I can also understand how that's not everyone's cup of tea, so why they can't set aside a time to nude bathe or sunbathe, I do not know.  

 

Wow. That's bad. I don't think I've ever watched a show that was cancelled while it was airing. This would be a first.

I have watched dozens that were cancelled while airing, but with almost all of them, I was unhappy to see the shows go. Not gonna have that problem here.