Small Talk: 90 Words Per Minute

[canadawoman]

Thanks for all the info on the U.S. procedure. It's a bit different up in the Great White North since you don't have to be married to be a sponsor (common-law relationships work too as do same sex relationships). But the procedures to weed out sham arrangements is similar. 

 

Here's a legal conundrum to throw out there.  What does constitute a valid marriage nowadays? In a sense, all marriages are marriages of convenience as long as both parties get what they think they contracted for.  Danielle obviously thinks regular sex (or at least some sex) would be part of the deal so if she and Mohamed haven't slept together since the marriage, she could get it annulled.  But she said, post wedding, that Mo could "help her make decisions" and "be part of the family" so that seems like a pretty low bar for him.  If he can start bringing in a pay cheque and keep the electricity bills paid... maybe that's good enough?  

[Raja]

Thanks for all the info on the U.S. procedure. It's a bit different up in the Great White North since you don't have to be married to be a sponsor (common-law relationships work too as do same sex relationships). But the procedures to weed out sham arrangements is similar. 

 

 

Now that same sex marriage is legal in many states same sex couples are eligible for spousal visas in the US. The Manila embassy issued their first ones about a year ago to the wife of a USN sailor and a  preoperative transsexual to a male US Army soldier t.

[poeticlicensed]

I am still trying to figure out how Dani could sponsor Mo on her income Sure there are ways to get money to her, but my understanding is that INS demands not evidence of money, but evidence of income by way of W2s, etc. So even if his family or he paid her, it doesn't matter because she has to show that she can support a family of 5 with her income. If her ex pays a substantial amount of CS, that would also need to be documented. THe only thing I can come up with is that she had a co-sponsor. I am just trying to figure out who the heck that could be? Her son maybe? Although he seemed wary of the situation, but I wouldn't put it past Dani to talk him into it.  From what I read, her ex is not financially solid, and her family and friends all seem to lead quite the hardscrabble life. 

Edited December 29, 2014 by poeticlicensed

[canadawoman]

>>Oh, okay, I give up -- I am just as guilty as everyone else watching this, but maybe it's time we started calling out these networks on their "reality" series and call them what they really are -- series, sitcoms, etc.., but for much cheaper!<<

 

I hear ya and I admit that I only watched this series and not any of the other reality series but..... I think something far more interesting is going on. 

 

I think the producers/editors etc. started with their own angles/points of view on each couple. And that scenes were set up to follow that point of view and make as much drama as possible. I mean the whole confrontation between Brett, Daya and his mother "did you know Daya could hear everything from the next room?" Uh, yeah of course.... And the confrontation between Amy and her racist father in law etc.  And with Dani and Mo, it was lonely older woman hooks up with evil toy-boy exploiter.

 

I can see the producers taking these general themes and running with them but then something strange happens. People don't always behave or present themselves in the manner that's been assigned to them. If Danny had exploded when his father was so rude to Amy it would have made for better drama....but he didn't. 

 

And the Danielle/Mo train wreck probably went a different way too.  I think the original theory must have been that, by the end, everyone would be sympathetic to Danielle and despise Mohamed for exploiting her.  And that's why this series (the only one I can speak to) reminded me of jury trials. Each side, prosecution and defence, presents its own narrative with separate points of view about how things really occurred. Yet somehow, some way in most of the jury trials I've been involved in, the jury members-- in most instances-- manage to see the truth.  Not always of course, but often enough.  And I think that's what has happened in this series at least to the extent of the knowledge that's available.  This forum in particular is like a giant jury with individuals sharing their own perceptions and, in many instances, saying "Hmm, I'm not buying this narrative." I hope that made sense!

[90dayjunky]

I have to agree that it's a puzzle how Danielle could qualify to sponsor a fiance. From what I hear, it's lots harder to get K1 than when I applied (2007),especially from high fraud countries. And Tunisia IS a high fraud country. No way would his family pay Danielle to marry him. They could have gotten someone much younger, etc., if they were going to pay. HOWEVER, traveling through the Dulles airport, I happened across a woman (and I use that term loosely) who had just returned from 2 months with her "fiance." OMG, this woman made Danielle look good. This woman was dumb as a rock, unattractive, poor, and PREGNANT. All the time, I was saying to myself WTF is wrong with you, you moron? She was on disability, yet had gotten the money together, I think from her brother, who probably wanted a caretaker for her. I see some of the people who are put in Administrative Processing who are real couples with years of history, yet these "couples" must have breezed by...who the hell knows? 

 

Like I said before, many of the Arab men find a community to hang out with, who advise them VERY WELL about how to "work" the system. My ex and I remain friends, he works hard (for himself) and has grown up a lot. But he told me stories of how some of the ones he knows cheated on taxes for business, paid people in large cities to marry them until they have their green cards, etc. It does piss me off that they come here and USE our resources to cheat the government.

 

We never had to attend a meeting for AOS, but we had a real marriage, believe it or not. But he was immature and had anger issues, so I finally had enough and said goodbye. The women I know married to Arab men either put up with them or leave. Most are now divorced. The men are usually waited on hand and foot growing up by the women in the household, then expect that from their wives. They expect to lead the same life they had over there, doing what they want, hanging out at coffee cafes, etc. To me, that's not a marriage, but everyone's different.

[Yolapukka]

 

it's on the Norwalk county court site, public records. That isn't official enough?

 

I have run afoul of the rules a couple times and still don't understand, but it's not my board so I just gotta go with it.

 

 

I have a friend who has a name with an unconventional spelling and I know for a fact that he has a minor criminal record. I did an internet search out of purely idle curiosity and came up with a lot of hits for criminal charges, convictions etc for people who clearly weren't him but had exactly the same name, some of those were for quite serious acts and at least one of the people was in a community close to his own. Her name showing up in county records isn't enough to prove that she has an unsavoury history without corroboration that it's exactly the same person, not just someone with the same name. 

Edited December 29, 2014 by yuggapukka

[JennyO]

I am still trying to figure out how Dani could sponsor Mo on her income Sure there are ways to get money to her, but my understanding is that INS demands not evidence of money, but evidence of income by way of W2s, etc. So even if his family or he paid her, it doesn't matter because she has to show that she can support a family of 5 with her income. If her ex pays a substantial amount of CS, that would also need to be documented. THe only thing I can come up with is that she had a co-sponsor. I am just trying to figure out who the heck that could be? Her son maybe? Although he seemed wary of the situation, but I wouldn't put it past Dani to talk him into it.  From what I read, her ex is not financially solid, and her family and friends all seem to lead quite the hardscrabble life. 

 

If I remember correctly, they not only ask for W2's (I think we had to send in 3 years worth, plus a letter from his job), but also provide information on assets. Perhaps she either got a sponsor, or the assets (cash from the show) was enough?

 

One thing I never thought of until last night was - How did Yamir get sponsored? It didn't seem like Chelsea had a job. Unless her parents helped? That seems like a foolish thing to do, considering you are legally responsible for the person for 10 years, regardless if they stay married or not.

[Virtually Me]

Thanks for all the info on the U.S. procedure. It's a bit different up in the Great White North since you don't have to be married to be a sponsor (common-law relationships work too as do same sex relationships). But the procedures to weed out sham arrangements is similar. 

 

Here's a legal conundrum to throw out there.  What does constitute a valid marriage nowadays? In a sense, all marriages are marriages of convenience as long as both parties get what they think they contracted for.  Danielle obviously thinks regular sex (or at least some sex) would be part of the deal so if she and Mohamed haven't slept together since the marriage, she could get it annulled.  But she said, post wedding, that Mo could "help her make decisions" and "be part of the family" so that seems like a pretty low bar for him.  If he can start bringing in a pay cheque and keep the electricity bills paid... maybe that's good enough?  

 

The qualifications for annulment vary from state to state.  ICE primarily wants evidence that looks like the couple lives together, spends time together, and mingles their finances, to some extent.  The closest I've seen them come to asking about sex is questions about sleeping arrangements, "What side of the bed do you sleep on?" and like that.  In my 12 years of practice, I've seen pretty much everything.  One case that would be a good example is a naturalized immigrant from Lebanon who married a Syrian woman on a K1 to help her get a cancer treatment she couldn't get in Syria.  He stayed with her until she recovered, then they divorced.  They were able to convince ICE that they were the real deal. He wasn't in love with her, but he had the resources and cared enough about her to help her out.

[canadawoman]

"What side of the bed do you sleep on?"<<

 

And I guess Mo's answer would be: "the really far side, ya know, on the couch in the living room" <g>

 

The MoHos on his FB page seem to be giving him terrible advice so I wouldn't be surprised if he screws up his route to the magical green card. 

 

Danielle is still a mystery to me. Sounds harsh, but she seems like the type of person who's been on disability social assistance for ages. I can't imagine anyone willing to be her co-sponsor. Maybe the job held long enough for her to pass the initial application but....sheesh, whatta mess!

[Virtually Me]

I understand that Mo has found a sponsor, but, I can't confirm it.  My brother was thinking about sponsoring him and got in touch with him to feel him out about it.  They never got that far, though.  Mo kept blowing him off.

[Virtually Me]

Dani is back on board Mo's fan page.  This clip is interesting.

 

Danielle Mullins Jbali: the only thing i agreed was to let the world in on what was being filmed. Not the rest of my life. What does my past mistakes have to do with this show. Have u guys ever thought with people posting my court stuff people found out girls last name and now are bothering them. We were trying to protect the girls but no cause of someone being obessed with us trying to find out every little thing out in our lives. Started posting stuff that had nothing to do with show. I dont need guidance i was fine before me and mohamed and i will be fine with or without mohamed. I have raised those kids for the last 2years on my own. I dont need strangers that dont know nothing about me or my life to give me guidance thinking they know best.

[cooksdelight]

She could be talking about things posted here. Another reason I wanted a lot of things that had nothing to do with the show to be left out of the conversation.

People get wrapped up in a show and forget there are people whose private lives are being invaded by the cameras. And with that, come the people online who feel it's OK to keep pushing, keep digging, keep poking the bear.

[AnnaL]

I understand that Mo has found a sponsor, but, I can't confirm it.  My brother was thinking about sponsoring him and got in touch with him to feel him out about it.  They never got that far, though.  Mo kept blowing him off.

Sponsoring him?

WOW , I guess I have read it all, why would your brother sponsor a complete stranger?

Does your brother realizes the kind of financial commitment he would have put himself through?

It is obvious that the reason why Mohammed is requesting complete strangers (in the shape of FB friends) is because Danielle doesn't meet the minimum amount of income to sponsor him. So whoever co-sponsors him would be most likely the main sponsor and financially responsible for Mohammed.

Your brother or any other person has to sign official federal papers committing himself to be financially responsible for a person they do not know, who would even consider that idea?

I am sorry if it seems harsh but I found this idea completely crazy, it makes question not Mohammed but the kind of fool who would even consider doing it.

[technorebel]

I understand that Mo has found a sponsor, but, I can't confirm it.  My brother was thinking about sponsoring him and got in touch with him to feel him out about it.  They never got that far, though.  Mo kept blowing him off.

 

Pardon me for asking, but why on earth would your brother (or anyone, really) want to sponsor some stranger off a tv show?  It seems bizarre to me.

[MandM]

Dani is acknowledging the court records. From her post to his fan page one hour ago:

(Snip) ... Have u guys ever thought with people posting my court stuff people found out girls last name and now are bothering them. We were trying to protect the girls ... (/snip)

Unfortunately, she didn't think to hide her FB friends, or ask her family to do the same, to hide her girl's last names. As minors they should be off limits and she should have thought about protecting them ahead of time.

[locomoco]

Pardon me for asking, but why on earth would your brother (or anyone, really) want to sponsor some stranger off a tv show?  It seems bizarre to me.

Maybe his brother is really attraced to Danielle, and getting Mo out of the picture as fast as possible is is motive...

[cooksdelight]

I'm not going to let anyone here go there.... with court records.... based on a Facebook post.

[Virtually Me]

Dani is acknowledging the court records. From her post to his fan page one hour ago:

(Snip) ... Have u guys ever thought with people posting my court stuff people found out girls last name and now are bothering them. We were trying to protect the girls ... (/snip)

Unfortunately, she didn't think to hide her FB friends, or ask her family to do the same, to hide her girl's last names. As minors they should be off limits and she should have thought about protecting them ahead of time.

 

Her kid's photos and names are on her FB page.  I've been to each of their pages.  They're actually pretty cool girls, especially Faith.  No one needed outside information to find them.  She put them on TV.  I noticed that her grandchild was never introduced.  Corey is too smart to expose her.

Pardon me for asking, but why on earth would your brother (or anyone, really) want to sponsor some stranger off a tv show?  It seems bizarre to me.

 

He's an immigration attorney, too.  They would have to meet and see how that would work first.  It's a human rights practice.  We work on referrals and sponsor immigrants, mostly refugees from the ME, Asia and Africa.

[technorebel]

 

He's an immigration attorney, too.  They would have to meet and see how that would work first.  It's a human rights practice.  We work on referrals and sponsor immigrants, mostly refugees from the ME, Asia and Africa.

 

So then Mo the Scammer could pretend to be some kind of refugee?  Sweet deal for him.

[AnnaL]

So then Mo the Scammer could pretend to be some kind of refugee?  Sweet deal for him.

Unbelievable isn't it?

An of course a total mockery to the completely verifiable refugee status of some real victims.

Mohammed is not a victim of anything but his own greed and selfish ways.

[Virtually Me]

So then Mo the Scammer could pretend to be some kind of refugee?  Sweet deal for him.

 

Gave you an inch, you took a mile.

[technorebel]

Gave you an inch, you took a mile.

You said it was a "human rights practice".  So how would that apply to Mohamed? 

[Virtually Me]

You said it was a "human rights practice".  So how would that apply to Mohamed? 

 

Clients are vetted.  How they're portrayed on a TV show is not a barrier to consideration.

Edited December 30, 2014 by Virtually Me

[Cherrio]

Clients are vetted.  How they're portrayed on a TV show is not a barrier to consideration.

I am curious about something.   Being lawyers, wouldn't attorney-client privilege be broken by you or your brother talking about a client or potential client?

   I am asking in good faith, no snark.   :)

[Virtually Me]

I am curious about something.   Being lawyers, wouldn't attorney-client privilege be broken by you or your brother talking about a client or potential client?

   I am asking in good faith, no snark.   :)

 

It's a good question.  He was never a client, not even a potential client.  The most substantive conversation they ever had was about the weather; the subject of sponsorship never came up.  It was just an idea my brother had that went no where.  Turns out, Mo would rather talk to the ladies. 

[Cherrio]

It's a good question.  He was never a client, not even a potential client.  The most substantive conversation they ever had was about the weather; the subject of sponsorship never came up.  It was just an idea my brother had that went no where.  Turns out, Mo would rather talk to the ladies. 

Thanks !   :)

[Lola16]

Danielle complains in that tvruckus (sp?) article that due to her court records, people learned the last name of her daughters.  As others pointed out, that is easily obtained by her Facebook and a white pages search.  If she wanted to keep that part of her life private, she should have only shown her adult child.  Or scrubbed her social media like Justin did.

[LovetoSnark]

Dani is acknowledging the court records. From her post to his fan page one hour ago:

(Snip) ... Have u guys ever thought with people posting my court stuff people found out girls last name and now are bothering them. We were trying to protect the girls ... (/snip)

Unfortunately, she didn't think to hide her FB friends, or ask her family to do the same, to hide her girl's last names. As minors they should be off limits and she should have thought about protecting them ahead of time.

Call me stupid but I do not see the connection of posting court documents and finding out the girls last names. The court documents never identified the girls at all. Danielle is getting a lot of heat over on facebook and once again as she did when Mo left, she is dragging her girls into the fray and using them.

[cooksdelight]

In regard to Mo's "acceptable" comment and whether or not he can or will have sex before marriage....

I knew a guy when I was in my 20s. Drop dead gorgeous handsome, incredibly sexy. Smart, well-educated, lawyer... we went out a few times and the time came when he wound up spending the night. He could NOT and would NOT have intercourse. It wasn't anything to do with his religious beliefs, it was some sort of thing in his head that he couldn't do it until he got married. He was attracted to me on all levels, but he was waiting until he got married.

I don't know how he got through four years of college at a huge party school and then law school... and remained a virgin. But he did. He eventually got married and they had triplets. :)

So, my point is that every guy.... Danny, Mo, etc.... have their own reasons for not having sex. Who are we to question why? Mo's motives may be his own hang-ups or beliefs.

Or, the thought of possibly having Danielle getting pregnant has him scared to death. :)

[Virtually Me]

Sister Sarah is in the house:

 

Sara Mullins McGue: Danielle Mullins Jbali you can not fix ignorant so just stop playing into their hands and Mohamed Jbali deactivate this stupid page and quit accepting every friend request you get your just hurting your marriage which is suppose to be a private thing

[technorebel]

They should both listen to Sara.  If not for that Facebook, there'd be nothing left to talk about, and people would move on.

[Virtually Me]

They should both listen to Sara.  If not for that Facebook, there'd be nothing left to talk about, and people would move on.

 

Something that's been an ongoing source of irritation for Dani and her family are his FB pages.  He never addresses Dani, has no pics of her or them together, never defends her, never says a word about their marriage or her.  It's, well, bizarre.  I thought he might break out with hearts and flowers after the wedding show, but, it's still up to family and friends to let the fans know that he is married, that they are together and that they do things together.  He has no interest in any of that.

[EggoWaffles]

I find it strange that Dani is getting angry at people in the audience, that do have freedom of public records (wether it be wrong or not) instead of getting mad at Mohammed for making such a monstrosity on Facebook. I don't actually think Mo intends to put the daughters at harm at all... so she should at least confide in him to not allow things that would hurt and/or degrade them. I kind of wish she would wake up and be like "I will not sponsor you until you get rid of your fan page"

[LovetoSnark]

They should both listen to Sara.  If not for that Facebook, there'd be nothing left to talk about, and people would move on.

I agree listening to Sara is a good idea...... but Sara should also tell Danielle that she needs to stop talking to the media. Interviews  in which she tells stories different than what she has said in the show etc. do nothing but keep the focus on them.  So is Mo really the smart one as he has enough sense to keep his mouth shut publicly or are the two of them hoping to get enough attention get their own reality show ??? . What a pair!!!

Edited December 30, 2014 by LovetoSnark

[BradandJanet]

They should both listen to Sara.  If not for that Facebook, there'd be nothing left to talk about, and people would move on.

 

Both Mohamed and Danielle whip up frenzy about themselves and the show over social media and then complain when they get attention they don't like. They're both old enough to understand they can't control what comes back to them in a public exchange. I hope they also realize that modern celebrity is fleeting and two months from now no one will have a clue or care who they are.

[Virtually Me]

Both Mohamed and Danielle whip up frenzy about themselves and the show over social media and then complain when they get attention they don't like. They're both old enough to understand they can't control what comes back to them in a public exchange. I hope they also realize that modern celebrity is fleeting and two months from now no one will have a clue or care who they are.

 

My brother told him that and he was very offended.  At the time, at least, Mo was pretty convinced that he would become a star.

[technorebel]

My brother told him that and he was very offended.  At the time, at least, Mo was pretty convinced that he would become a star.

 

Did Mohamed really think he would become a star because of this show?  He must not know just how many reality shows there are here.

[Virtually Me]

Did Mohamed really think he would become a star because of this show?  He must not know just how many reality shows there are here.

 

Oh, yes.  I think that's why the conversation about the sponsorship never took place.  The first thing he told Mo was that he needed to think about his life after the show because he wasn't likely to be a movie character.  Mo was offended, but polite.  He never warmed up to my brother after that.

[merylinkid]

Oh I believe they are going for a reality show.   After all, bills must be paid.

 

But on the other hand, there are people who have to have drama in their lives All. The. Damn. Time.  It's exhausting to be around people like that.   Something is always a major deal.   And if it is not, they will find a way to make it one.   Mo didn't have to respond to any of those women on his page.   Dani didn't have to read them.   but they both chose to do so.   Then go "oh look at all the drama, we just want to be left in peace."   Then shut up and live your life and stop letting others in.

[EggoWaffles]

Wow. He thinks he is famous.. *cracks up*

[canadawoman]

>>the thought of possibly having Danielle getting pregnant has him scared to death. :) <<

 

Omigod, that thought just scared ME too! 

[EggoWaffles]

Isn't Dani like 46 or something? I would speculate that it might be difficult to get pregnant at that age if they at least attempt to use protection... even if its a ziplock bag and a hair elastic  *knocks on wood*

[cooksdelight]

Brought from episode thread...

Really?? That's some BS of a contract. Who would sign something like that? Are all the reality show peeps under similar contracts, Cooksdelight?

The ones I have seen are pretty thick. And scary enough that my friends won't discuss any of the details for fear of a million dollar fine. Two that I personally know which are very strict are for Survivor and Next Food Network Star. Discovery Channel's Moonshiners participants also have to sign a confidentiality agreement. You cannot get those guys to tell you anything. They won't even discuss what the fine is.

This all started with Survivor, and a contestant suing the producer Mark Burnett because she said he tried to manipulate the outcome, and manipulate challenges and who won what. It was the first show of it's kind, and the case was settled out of court. No details ever emerged and from that point on the confidentiality contract was born.

People appearing on any reality show have to sign such an agreement. The amount of fines vary, but they are definitely part of the contract. They sign them because the temptation of being on television in a show that might make them a household name, and pay them handsomely, is a great motivator. I guess.... I wouldn't do one. My privacy matters more to me than money.

[essexjan]

I can't remember the date when Mohamed arrived in the USA, but a friend in Ohio who has inside info on the care facility where she worked told me that Danielle was terminated from her job on 30 May. In August a court tried to garnish her wages for a debt owed to a company called Springleaf Financial Services but she was already gone from her job by that time.

 

It seemed to me that things were being shown out of sequence because Mo had a different, shorter haircut at one point, then in the next scene it'd be longer again.

Edited December 30, 2014 by essexjan

[cooksdelight]

I hate when things are out of sequence, and these shows do it all the time. Their talking heads seem to all be filmed after the fact. I notice it most on cooking competitions like Hell's Kitchen or Top Chef. You know when someone's going home because they get more THs than anyone else. And they somehow manage to hold it together until they are eliminated and then the tears start to flow.

Did your friend actually work with Danielle?

[DakotaJustice]

Cooksdelight- I believe you. Jon Gosselin immediately comes to mind as TLC was on him like white on rice when he discussed their pay after he was off the show. They WANT us to speculate.

[cooksdelight]

Yes, they do! :)

I asked Jim Tom Hedrick, who's one of the Moonshiners, a question about money issues and he did that pinching motion in front of his mouth and said "I'm locked up tight as a drum!" He had some problems with Discovery when he wanted to start selling his brand of moonshine, legally. The problem was with the distillery he had a deal with, they were a rival to the other one in the area that was the primary sponsor of the show. Discovery at one point was threatening to sue him and bounce him off the show. But word about this did manage to leak out and Discovery backed down after so many people told them to shove it. Jim Tom is an old guy and why should they prevent him from making a living outside of the show? I don't think the other distillery is a sponsor any more, so it sort of looks like Discovery "discovered" which side of the bread their butter was on.

I am sure these people were made to sign a similar agreement to be on this show. But Mo doesn't understand the concept of staying off social media and keeping quiet. Neither does Danielle, apparently.

[essexjan]

Did your friend actually work with Danielle?

 

No, the care centre is in covenant with a large church, and it's the church that my friend works for, on the corporate/legal side, which is how she came to know about the garnishment order. I could give names (of the centre and church) but I don't want my friend to get into any trouble. The organisation has a residential centre plus group homes. I think from memory Dani said she worked as a home care assistant or something, so I'm guessing she was in one of the group homes.

 

I found this out because we were talking on the phone yesterday and I mentioned 90-day Fiancé. She had no idea I could see it in the UK (it won't be on TV here for months, but I stream it via the net). Apparently it's all anyone at the care centre and the church have been talking about (well, the church might have been talking a bit about Jesus, seeing as it's Christmas and all, but you know what I mean).

Edited December 30, 2014 by essexjan

[cooksdelight]

HA! I love it! Believe me, in this country, church ladies will always know everything that's going on with everyone in town. Feel free to share what you can without getting your friend in trouble or breaking any confidentiality laws. Since we can't count on her to tell the truth, it seems.

[essexjan]

HA! I love it! Believe me, in this country, church ladies will always know everything that's going on with everyone in town. Feel free to share what you can without getting your friend in trouble or breaking any confidentiality laws. Since we can't count on her to tell the truth, it seems.

I'll see if I can find out any more. I've edited my post above re Dani's job. And yeah, I know all about the church ladies. When my late boyfriend and I were first seeing each other, everyone in that little town knew all about it. In small-town Ohio you can't have a secret girlfriend - particularly a secret English girlfriend!