S11.E06: I See Red Flags

[JapMo]

1 hour ago, humbleopinion said:

The asshattery behavior at the bachelor party was a mix of too much booze, stupidity, thinking he was being funny and megalomaniac behavior...basically just being himself and playing it up for the cameras....no harm...except it put a target on his back.

Couldn't agree more.  He might turn out to be a total slime but he's not shown that, IMO, in the last 2 episodes.  

I think the show is definitely trying to portray him as the villian.  They always have to have one, and he totally could turn out to be exactly that.  But I am surprised how quickly they've put the target on his back.  I've watched since the beginning, but I can't remember in previous seasons where any one of the other couples sounded off on another...at least this early.  And not just saying on their TH that they think he/she is a jerk, but going so far as to issue a warning to the spouse.  

[dirtypop90]

On 8/23/2020 at 4:11 PM, TheMediumBopper said:

I'm still wondering how Miles defines 'serious relationships.' People he slept with? People he went out with for more than a month? People he thought he was in love with? It's hard to quantify what's too many when it comes to that sort of thing. Ten might be a lot of people to be in love with, but who am I to judge? I was on my third 'serious relationship' by 26, but when I look back at what I was like at 26 I was basically a child still. A child with a job and bills to pay.

So funny when you mention being a child. I believe he said he's been single for years. So 10 before he was 25. I was just graduating from law school then and I was a baby. I had one serious relationship (college sweet heart). But we were such children it was such puppy love. Besides him I went out on bad awkward dates with boys in law school, whom were not quite men, whom I cut off abruptly because I didn't have time for their bs. A colleague of mine bumped into a douche I went on two dates with when I was in law school. He told my colleague "he knew me well" "and we dated." We went on two horrible dates (and I only accepted the second because of his potential, professionally). This same guy pretended to "hardly know" a mutual friend he had sex with off and on for MONTHS when she was mentioned.  Men are "funny" when it comes to whom they count.  So who knows who Miles is counting and not counting.

Edited August 24, 2020 by dirtypop90

[Retired at last]

Not that I think Brett is a wonderful person, but, the fact that he went on a date after he applied to the show, but BEFORE he was cast is not a problem for me. I think it is like a job interview - even if you have a really good feeling about an interview, you keep applying for jobs until you get a firm offer. Thats what he did and when he was selected, he did NOT go on that 3rd date, so I see nothing wrong with that behavior. The Bachelor party was another case completely, and yes, he was a total jerk. But, the fact that he still dated before getting the call is fine.

[Kira53]

On 8/23/2020 at 12:54 AM, dirtypop90 said:

 We know he hops in and out of relationship. We have no clue how he treated those women. Not to mention the old phrase “birds of a feather flock together.” If his friend Woody is a “player,” very possible he is too. 

This is your assumption this is not something anyone "knows". He said he had 10 monogamous relationships. That means he did not have sex outside of the relationship however Long or short it was. His point was he is monogamous. And does not cheat. I believe he was distinguishing himself from his buddy Woody who admitted to some cheating in his relationship history.  In my opinion, it is good to leave when you realize that things will never get better. 10 monogamous relationships often means 10 bad choices but an integrity that does not allow you to cheat just because you're not happy in the relationship.

On 8/23/2020 at 4:11 PM, TheMediumBopper said:

I'm still wondering how Miles defines 'serious relationships.' People he slept with? People he went out with for more than a month? People he thought he was in love with? It's hard to quantify what's too many when it comes to that sort of thing. Ten might be a lot of people to be in love with, but who am I to judge? I was on my third 'serious relationship' by 26, but when I look back at what I was like at 26 I was basically a child still. A child with a job and bills to pay.

I hope you know by now that he did not say "serious relationships" he said "monogamous relationships". The number of relationships you're in depends in part upon the type of relationships you've entered into. You have people who have a lot of relationships because they fall in love quickly and someone like Karen that probably takes a very long time to get into a relationship but when it's wrong or bad she just doesn't leave so they are in 2 bad relationships during their life.  If experience is a good teacher who has learned more? We don't actually know but two relationships are not enough learning experience to be a good girlfriend or a good wife unless you are working in counseling to understand yourself a lot better.  Of course that's just my opinion.

42 minutes ago, dirtypop90 said:

So funny when you mention being a child. I believe he said he's been single for years. So 10 before he was 25. I was just graduating from law school then and I was a baby. I had one serious relationship (college sweet heart). But we were such children it was such puppy love. Besides him I went out on bad awkward dates with boys in law school, whom were not quite men, whom I cut off abruptly because I didn't have time for their bs. A colleague of mine bumped into a douche I went on two dates with when I was in law school. He told my colleague "he knew me well" "and we dated." We went on two horrible dates (and I only accepted the second because of his potential, professionally). This same guy pretended to "hardly know" a mutual friend he had sex with off and on for MONTHS when she was mentioned.  Men are "funny" when it comes to whom they count.  So who knows who Miles is counting and not counting.

Miles has said that he always wanted to be a father and a husband or at least a husband. So he seems like the kind of man that was interested in relationships and sought them out. Your self description was you were more career oriented and less concerned about relationships so you had less relationships and that makes sense. I'm just tired of people taking their own situation and placing it on to Miles when he is his own man with his own needs and wishes.  Olivia's husband, Brett may have had 45 dates because most of the women didn't wanna have a second date. I'm not judging him either, except that probably a lot of women didn't want to have a second date.  I have see people go on a lot of dates because they're lonely and have a sense of neediness either for sex or for emotional connection that has them seek out people constantly.

[Boo Boo]

23 minutes ago, Kira53 said:

This is your assumption this is not something anyone "knows". He said he had 10 monogamous relationships. That means he did not have sex outside of the relationship however Long or short it was. His point was he is monogamous. And does not cheat. I believe he was distinguishing himself from his buddy Woody who admitted to some cheating in his relationship history.  In my opinion, it is good to leave when you realize that things will never get better. 10 monogamous relationships often means 10 bad choices but an integrity that does not allow you to cheat just because you're not happy in the relationship.

I hope you know by now that he did not say "serious relationships" he said "monogamous relationships". The number of relationships you're in depends in part upon the type of relationships you've entered into. You have people who have a lot of relationships because they fall in love quickly and someone like Karen that probably takes a very long time to get into a relationship but when it's wrong or bad she just doesn't leave so they are in 2 bad relationships during their life.  If experience is a good teacher who has learned more? We don't actually know but two relationships are not enough learning experience to be a good girlfriend or a good wife unless you are working in counseling to understand yourself a lot better.  Of course that's just my opinion.

Miles has said that he always wanted to be a father and a husband or at least a husband. So he seems like the kind of man that was interested in relationships and sought them out. Your self description was you were more career oriented and less concerned about relationships so you had less relationships and that makes sense. I'm just tired of people taking their own situation and placing it on to Miles when he is his own man with his own needs and wishes.  Olivia's husband, Brett may have had 45 dates because most of the women didn't wanna have a second date. I'm not judging him either, except that probably a lot of women didn't want to have a second date.  I have see people go on a lot of dates because they're lonely and have a sense of neediness either for sex or for emotional connection that has them seek out people constantly.

Amen to all of this.  The man said 10 monogamous relationships.  What on earth is wrong with that?  He didn't say he was engaged 10 times.  He didn't say he was in love 10 times.  He simply said he had had 10 relationships where he wasn't cheating on the person he was with.

He's young.  He's single.  People date.  People have relationships.  Maybe it lasts 3 months, maybe it lasts 1 month.   Maybe he counts his first girlfriend when he was 13.   Who knows?  Who cares.  

What we do know is Karen's ex-boyfriend was having at least 2 relationships at once, and one produced a baby.  I'm sure he had 8 other non-monagmous relationships that Karen probably gave two shits about.

 

[dirtypop90]

36 minutes ago, Kira53 said:

This is your assumption this is not something anyone "knows". He said he had 10 monogamous relationships. That means he did not have sex outside of the relationship however Long or short it was. His point was he is monogamous. And does not cheat. I believe he was distinguishing himself from his buddy Woody who admitted to some cheating in his relationship history.  In my opinion, it is good to leave when you realize that things will never get better. 10 monogamous relationships often means 10 bad choices but an integrity that does not allow you to cheat just because you're not happy in the relationship.

I hope you know by now that he did not say "serious relationships" he said "monogamous relationships". The number of relationships you're in depends in part upon the type of relationships you've entered into. You have people who have a lot of relationships because they fall in love quickly and someone like Karen that probably takes a very long time to get into a relationship but when it's wrong or bad she just doesn't leave so they are in 2 bad relationships during their life.  If experience is a good teacher who has learned more? We don't actually know but two relationships are not enough learning experience to be a good girlfriend or a good wife unless you are working in counseling to understand yourself a lot better.  Of course that's just my opinion.

Miles has said that he always wanted to be a father and a husband or at least a husband. So he seems like the kind of man that was interested in relationships and sought them out. Your self description was you were more career oriented and less concerned about relationships so you had less relationships and that makes sense. I'm just tired of people taking their own situation and placing it on to Miles when he is his own man with his own needs and wishes.  Olivia's husband, Brett may have had 45 dates because most of the women didn't wanna have a second date. I'm not judging him either, except that probably a lot of women didn't want to have a second date.  I have see people go on a lot of dates because they're lonely and have a sense of neediness either for sex or for emotional connection that has them seek out people constantly.

My point is simply we don’t know the man or anything about his so called monogamous relationships. He could be LYING about them being monogamous just as Karen’s ex was lying to her. It’s been what...3 episodes...we don’t know what’s coming from miles.

maybe I just watch too much reality tv but I’ve seen a number of people fall from Prince Charming to the crap on the bottom on your shoe as the season goes on. I don’t get the passion about miles after 3 episodes. :shrugs: I was just expressing my doubts as others have. Like I do about every one. 

[Ilovepie]

18 minutes ago, dirtypop90 said:

maybe I just watch too much reality tv but I’ve seen a number of people fall from Prince Charming to the crap on the bottom on your shoe as the season goes on. I don’t get the passion about miles after 3 episodes.

I wouldn't say it's "passion about Miles" per se, but more the way he has been shown so far. You are right, he could be lying. But I look at what his friends and family said about him and that goes farther to reinforce my belief that he is what he says he is more than what he says about himself. Also, he has shown himself to be sensitive to Karen which she also verbally confirmed. If she wasn't so reticent and talking about red flags, or she was as outwardly happy with him as Amani is with Woody, I don't think there would be any of this discussion here. They would just be a nice boring MAFS couple. Further, if he was truly a MAFS villain, we as viewers would already have been shown that because the one thing this show isn't is subtle......

[humbleopinion]

8 hours ago, Retired at last said:

 I think it is like a job interview - even if you have a really good feeling about an interview, you keep applying for jobs until you get a firm offer.

Agreed.

Even if he was knocking boots with "a wonderful woman" as Dr. Pepper was ringing the doorbell to tell him he was cast,  he still was within the rules of the  engagement...so to speak... because he had not been verbally informed that he was an official groom.

 Olivia wishes Brett had a very  "firm offer" in his sweatpants for her....

Edited August 25, 2020 by humbleopinion

[TheMediumBopper]

As douchey as Brett appears to be, I give him a pass for the bachelor party behavior because he was obviously loaded (and not in the way that Olivia is 'loaded,' alas). I think he even mentioned that he had to go home suddenly because he was going to puke. I'd like to say that I've never been in a position where I made a poor impression by becoming a drunken asshat who later ralphed my guts out, but I'd be lying. It hasn't been a frequent occurrence, but when it has occurred, let's just say it was memorable to all who witnessed it.

Postscript: While I'm thinking of bachelor parties, I must add this still of Bennett with the Big Booty Strippers and a perplexingly wet crotch front. When I'm feeling a little low, this pic lifts my spirits every time!

Edited August 24, 2020 by TheMediumBopper

[humbleopinion]

MAFS is educational.....

Brett executed what he called "the Irish goodbye" and Woody called "dipping" the party.

Both are the same... leaving suddenly and abruptly out of a party, social gathering or very bad date without bidding farewell.

Love Woody and Bennett bonding over their dance with the 2 strippers and guest with the blue front fanny pack.......

Edited August 24, 2020 by humbleopinion

[Kira53]

59 minutes ago, humbleopinion said:

MAFS is educational.....

Brett executed what he called "the Irish goodbye" and Woody called "dipping" the party.

Both are the same... leaving suddenly and abruptly out of a party, social gathering or very bad date without bidding farewell.

Love Woody and Bennett bonding over their dance with the 2 strippers and guest with the blue front fanny pack.......

It just occurred to me that Brett would not have anticipated how long the filming of the bachelor party would be. He doesn't look like a person that's that good at pacing his drinking anyway.

His marriage was probably doomed the minute Olivia saw that old Samsonite luggage.  She knew instantly that he didn't love the finer things in life.  He didn't even try and borrow a current luggage.  She probably started estimating his income right then.  And she began to think about decades of germs on that Samsonite!  

[JapMo]

57 minutes ago, Kira53 said:

His marriage was probably doomed the minute Olivia saw that old Samsonite luggage.  She knew instantly that he didn't love the finer things in life.  He didn't even try and borrow a current luggage.  She probably started estimating his income right then.  And she began to think about decades of germs on that Samsonite!  

I wonder how many comments would have been made about that luggage if Bennett showed up with it.

[Yeah No]

9 hours ago, sara416 said:

You are just providing some pretty sweeping judgements about someone who, from what we have seen, is functioning just fine, as well as giving incorrect diagnostic information, out of date and offensive phrasing,  and assuming the worst about someone who is dealing with a very common mental health diagnosis. I agree about the editing, this is one of the most highly and obvuiously edited reality shows that I have seen. But for dramatic purposes, they absolutely would have shown Miles in a depressive episode if they had that to go on. I don't have an issue with your opinion that certain things should be disclosed, but it's also up to that person to disclose them. And he did a great job of disclosing it and stating his needs. 

I don't really assume the worst of Miles or any of the people on this show, but I can be very skeptical about them, and in my opinion with good reason.  I didn't start out this way but over time I've realized that the show is famous for picking some pretty dysfunctional people, which I think is unethical and irresponsible.  If not for that I probably wouldn't be skeptical about any of them.  I'm least skeptical of Bennett and Amelia.  I haven't made any hard judgments on any of them one way or the other because I think it's too soon to do that. 

I think it's the show's responsibility to make sure these people are what and who they say they are or present themselves to be.  Sadly, though, that has often not been the case, hence my skepticism.  I think it's too soon to tell whether Miles is or is not what he presents himself to be, and what the show has made him appear to be.  These couples are usually on their best behavior on the honeymoons (with exceptions as I'm sure we can all remember), so I don't think the show would have necessarily already shown anything negative about Miles by this time.  The true test will come once they settle down into regular life.  I have a feeling that Miles and Karen are going to face many challenges just by virtue of not being the best match personality-wise.  Plus she seems shut down to him already, which can't be a good sign for their future.  I agree that he showed great courage and conscientiousness in making his disclosure, which only says good things about his character.

[Yeah No]

4 hours ago, dirtypop90 said:

My point is simply we don’t know the man or anything about his so called monogamous relationships. He could be LYING about them being monogamous just as Karen’s ex was lying to her. It’s been what...3 episodes...we don’t know what’s coming from miles.

maybe I just watch too much reality tv but I’ve seen a number of people fall from Prince Charming to the crap on the bottom on your shoe as the season goes on. I don’t get the passion about miles after 3 episodes. :shrugs: I was just expressing my doubts as others have. Like I do about every one. 

Hah, I see you're like me this way in being loathe to buy into any "good guy" image until we have more information given the way some of these people can suddenly show themselves to be awful as soon as the honeymoon is over.  I don't know if I think he could be lying so much as leaving out some details that might put a whole 'nother spin on his relationships.  For all we know he was monogamous with a series of "fuckbuddies", LOL.  I honestly don't think so as he seems to be more of a straight arrow than that, but yeah, I'm still skeptical.  Call it that old gut instinct of mine.  I'm not sure yet why I have a gut feeling but it's what keeps me skeptical about him until we get more information.

3 hours ago, Ilovepie said:

I wouldn't say it's "passion about Miles" per se, but more the way he has been shown so far. You are right, he could be lying. But I look at what his friends and family said about him and that goes farther to reinforce my belief that he is what he says he is more than what he says about himself. Also, he has shown himself to be sensitive to Karen which she also verbally confirmed. If she wasn't so reticent and talking about red flags, or she was as outwardly happy with him as Amani is with Woody, I don't think there would be any of this discussion here. They would just be a nice boring MAFS couple. Further, if he was truly a MAFS villain, we as viewers would already have been shown that because the one thing this show isn't is subtle......

Those are good points, his family has sung his praises but haven't we seen that before and then found out that there's a real deal breaker or something far less than ideal about the person as the season progresses?  We have seen other people that are not really villains but aren't really what they seem to be either.  They can have some strange attitudes or show themselves to be players or abusive in one way or another after the "honeymoon" is over.  Like I remember how Tres seemed like such a great guy and then as the season wore on it became apparent that he wasn't what he seemed to be despite how polite and full of gifts he was on the surface.  Even Basement Ryan seemed OK in the beginning, and several others that I can't enumerate right now.  I don't agree that the show always lets on to someone being a less than ideal partner this early.  It has happened after the honeymoon is over and they go back to "real life".  I really, really hope that MIles doesn't turn out to be a big disappointment.  He may be fine and Karen may be the one to sabotage what could have been a good relationship.  Speaking of red flags, she has waved enough of them herself.  it is very obvious that she thinks she is superior to Miles and that he is immature - and he may not deserve that.

[Rae Spellman]

2 hours ago, JapMo said:

I wonder how many comments would have been made about that luggage if Bennett showed up with it.

Expectations for Bennet are pretty low even though he may be less ready to be a husband than all of the other guys. Dude doesn't have plumbing in his home, doesn't have stable employment, and builds forts on his honeymoon!  The flip phone and the fact that he finds dates without approaching women or using the apps is interesting though. 

Clearly Brett has his issues. But, I appreciate his old luggage, his 8-4 work schedule, and habit of cooking at home. Also, while I rolled my eyes at the 45 dates and his behavior at the bachelor party, Brett said that he's never cheated on anyone and  he gave the woman who cheated on him a second chance.   

[Ilovepie]

2 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Those are good points, his family has sung his praises but haven't we seen that before and then found out that there's a real deal breaker or something far less than ideal about the person as the season progresses? 

I was more thinking about the scene with Miles and Woody and their mutual friends when they told them they were getting married. None of them seemed surprised that Miles was matched but more than a few raised their eyebrows at Woody. One even verbalized “I can see it for (Miles), but you??!” And obviously, family is a biased opinion, unless your talking Henry’s dad! But the way his mom described him does align with what we’ve been shown, so I tend to believe her.
I also feel like as we move further from the “social experiment” aspect of this show and more into Lifetime Garbage Reality Crapfest territory, the producers have been less subtle about the casting/storylines and it’s easy to pick out villains pretty early on - I mean consider that in the last couple seasons you have the Kate/Luke debacle and last season Meka/Michael AND Taylor/Brandon drama. All started on the honeymoon. I definitely feel like Miles is getting a good guy edit. Maybe I’m wrong, but unlike Karen, I cannot see any red flags. 😋

[Yeah No]

5 hours ago, Ilovepie said:

I was more thinking about the scene with Miles and Woody and their mutual friends when they told them they were getting married. None of them seemed surprised that Miles was matched but more than a few raised their eyebrows at Woody. One even verbalized “I can see it for (Miles), but you??!” And obviously, family is a biased opinion, unless your talking Henry’s dad! But the way his mom described him does align with what we’ve been shown, so I tend to believe her.
I also feel like as we move further from the “social experiment” aspect of this show and more into Lifetime Garbage Reality Crapfest territory, the producers have been less subtle about the casting/storylines and it’s easy to pick out villains pretty early on - I mean consider that in the last couple seasons you have the Kate/Luke debacle and last season Meka/Michael AND Taylor/Brandon drama. All started on the honeymoon. I definitely feel like Miles is getting a good guy edit. Maybe I’m wrong, but unlike Karen, I cannot see any red flags. 😋

I probably have watched way too much of this show and hence find more red flags and reasons to worry about all of them.  I am skeptical about every one of them at this point, except for Bennett and Amelia - somehow they seem to be a success story in the making, similar to Austin and Jessica last season.  I think Miles has tripped my "too good to be true" meter based on how he has been edited - perhaps that is how Karen is reacting to him right now too, and why she looks like she's already decided he's not for her.  I think it would be fantastic if over time both she AND I eventually warm up to him.  I'm really a romantic at heart - I want to see these people succeed!

[Boo Boo]

2 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I probably have watched way too much of this show and hence find more red flags and reasons to worry about all of them.  I am skeptical about every one of them at this point, except for Bennett and Amelia - somehow they seem to be a success story in the making, similar to Austin and Jessica last season.  I think Miles has tripped my "too good to be true" meter based on how he has been edited - perhaps that is how Karen is reacting to him right now too, and why she looks like she's already decided he's not for her.  I think it would be fantastic if over time both she AND I eventually warm up to him.  I'm really a romantic at heart - I want to see these people succeed!

Karen reacted to him before she married him based on him being "too emotional" on Instagram.  I wouldn't take stock in how she is reacting to him based on that and her view of masculinity.

[Boo Boo]

On Brett dating after signing up for it, I understand there's a waiting period, but how fair is it to the woman he dated that he's signed up to get married to a stranger?  Maybe he was honest about it and she didn't care, but if you're signing up to get married, why is it so hard to wait out when you find out if you are go or no go?  I would think the producers of the show would prefer they weren't dating b/c he could've easily decided he wanted to pursue a relationship and backed out when the producers gave him the go ahead.

I thought the purpose of MAFS was that these people were striking out in the traditional dating world.  Brett doesn't appear to be striking out.

Edited August 25, 2020 by Boo Boo

[qtpye]

6 minutes ago, Boo Boo said:

On Brett dating after signing up for it, I understand there's a waiting period, but how fair is it to the woman he dated that he's signed up to get married to a stranger?  Maybe he was honest about it and she didn't care, but if you're signing up to get married, why is it so hard to wait out when you find out if you are go or no go?  I would think the producers of the show would prefer they weren't dating b/c he could've easily decided he wanted to pursue a relationship and backed out when the producers gave him the go ahead.

I thought the purpose of MAFS was that these people were striking out in the traditional dating world.  Brett doesn't appear to be striking out.

Because the whole point was to let Olivia know that she had competition. If he liked the woman so much, he could of easily backed out and they would have picked someone else. He also probably was just curious about who they picked for him to marry and now feels like Olivia was not measuring up so regrets his decision.

[Boo Boo]

3 minutes ago, qtpye said:

Because the whole point was to let Olivia know that she had competition. If he liked the woman so much, he could of easily backed out and they would have picked someone else. He also probably was just curious about who they picked for him to marry and now feels like Olivia was not measuring up so regrets his decision.

And there's the "I'm going to be on TV' thing.

Even the Olivia's of the world who seem so sweet and successful must have a bit of the attention ho in them.

[seacliffsal]

Has anyone found Miles' instagram stories that upset Karen?  I don't have an instagram account and am not sure how to find his account.  I think we would have a much better idea of Karen's expectations and Miles' behavior if we saw his stories.  Anyone?  Bueller?

[Retired at last]

13 hours ago, JapMo said:

I wonder how many comments would have been made about that luggage if Bennett showed up with it.

I am guessing that Bennett would have been comfortable packing in a backpack or grocery bag. No need for luggage! I am guessing maybe his mother loaned him a suitcase if he needed one.

 

1 hour ago, Boo Boo said:

I thought the purpose of MAFS was that these people were striking out in the traditional dating world.  Brett doesn't appear to be striking out.

Well, he's not striking out if all he wants is a hook-up, but if he is looking for a real committed relationship, he has not been successful, other than the time he was engaged.

[Rae Spellman]

 

9 hours ago, Ilovepie said:

I was more thinking about the scene with Miles and Woody and their mutual friends when they told them they were getting married. None of them seemed surprised that Miles was matched but more than a few raised their eyebrows at Woody. One even verbalized “I can see it for (Miles), but you??!” 

Miles' cousin said that. I wonder if those were really Woody's friends or just folks he's acquainted with through Miles. Maybe Woody needs to spend more time with people who see him like his grandmother sees him and less time with people who see him like his mother and Miles' relatives/friends see him. I dated a guy who reminds me of Woody when I was a little younger than they are. He was a good guy underneath all the show. Still, it might be wise for Amani to temper her expectations for this experiment.  Hopefully she'll find out what her dads, man of honor, and other male friends/relatives think of Woody over time.

1 hour ago, Boo Boo said:

On Brett dating after signing up for it, I understand there's a waiting period, but how fair is it to the woman he dated that he's signed up to get married to a stranger? 

Dr. Viviana  thought the way Brett revealed the information was in poor taste but didn't think there was anything was wrong with Brett continuing to date until he was matched. Even if Brett hadn't applied for MAFS, based on his recent dating history, it's likely that things wouldn't have progressed much farther than the third date anyway. 

36 minutes ago, seacliffsal said:

Has anyone found Miles' instagram stories that upset Karen?  I don't have an instagram account and am not sure how to find his account.  I think we would have a much better idea of Karen's expectations and Miles' behavior if we saw his stories.  Anyone?  Bueller?

Karen told him that he needed to set it to private and he seemed to agree. 

[Ilovepie]

4 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I'm really a romantic at heart - I want to see these people succeed!

You and me both! I wish the show understood that most of their audience feels this way and they put more effort into making real matches and less effort into drama!

[Boo Boo]

7 minutes ago, RaeSpellman said:

 

Miles' cousin said that. I wonder if those were really Woody's friends or just folks he's acquainted with through Miles. Maybe Woody needs to spend more time with people who see him like his grandmother sees him and less time with people who see him like his mother and Miles' relatives/friends see him. I dated a guy who reminds me of Woody when I was a little younger than they are. He was a good guy underneath all the show. Still, it might be wise for Amani to temper her expectations for this experiment.  Hopefully she'll find out what her dads, man of honor, and other male friends/relatives think of Woody over time.

Dr. Viviana  thought the way Brett revealed the information was in poor taste but didn't think there was anything was wrong with Brett continuing to date until he was matched. Even if Brett hadn't applied for MAFS, based on his recent dating history, it's likely that things wouldn't have progressed much farther than the third date anyway. 

Karen told him that he needed to set it to private and he seemed to agree. 

That reminds me:  I don't think Brett being a "serial dater" is necessarily a bad thing either.  

He's been engaged once before, so clearly he's not just a hook up machine.  I mean, if he's just in it for easy 3rd date sex, that's one thing.  But if he's dating until he finds the right one, isn't that what we're supposed to do?

That said, I still think if you've signed up fro "getting married" show, there's no purpose to dating other than hooking up.  I mean, unless the decision on casting takes a long time and you don't think you'll get it.

[Ilovepie]

2 hours ago, qtpye said:

Because the whole point was to let Olivia know that she had competition. If he liked the woman so much, he could of easily backed out and they would have picked someone else. He also probably was just curious about who they picked for him to marry and now feels like Olivia was not measuring up so regrets his decision.

 

2 hours ago, Boo Boo said:

And there's the "I'm going to be on TV' thing.

Plus, they do get paid something for participating, as well as a free vacation to Mexico..........

[qtpye]

35 minutes ago, RaeSpellman said:

 

Miles' cousin said that. I wonder if those were really Woody's friends or just folks he's acquainted with through Miles. Maybe Woody needs to spend more time with people who see him like his grandmother sees him and less time with people who see him like his mother and Miles' relatives/friends see him. I dated a guy who reminds me of Woody when I was a little younger than they are. He was a good guy underneath all the show. Still, it might be wise for Amani to temper her expectations for this experiment.  Hopefully she'll find out what her dads, man of honor, and other male friends/relatives think of Woody over time.

Dr. Viviana  thought the way Brett revealed the information was in poor taste but didn't think there was anything was wrong with Brett continuing to date until he was matched. Even if Brett hadn't applied for MAFS, based on his recent dating history, it's likely that things wouldn't have progressed much farther than the third date anyway. 

Karen told him that he needed to set it to private and he seemed to agree. 

 

22 minutes ago, Boo Boo said:

That reminds me:  I don't think Brett being a "serial dater" is necessarily a bad thing either.  

He's been engaged once before, so clearly he's not just a hook up machine.  I mean, if he's just in it for easy 3rd date sex, that's one thing.  But if he's dating until he finds the right one, isn't that what we're supposed to do?

That said, I still think if you've signed up fro "getting married" show, there's no purpose to dating other than hooking up.  I mean, unless the decision on casting takes a long time and you don't think you'll get it.

That's the whole rub of it. It is really not a problem that Brett dated until he got matched...why should he stop living his life while waiting for the show to get back to him?

The way he revealed to Olivia was annoying. You could almost hear the wistfulness in his voice when talking about the "wonderful woman" he went on a couple of dates with.

I think Brett was horribly hurt during his engagement. He might, as a defense mechanism, try to push women away before they get too close to avoid being hurt again. The way he almost looked a little heart broken when Olivia gave him the 7 rating tells me that he is not the cool fuckboi he is pretending to be.

[humbleopinion]

Olivia is a self professed student of MAFS but she learned nothing from her DIY expertise....she should have known better...

To all future MAFS cast members..."10" is the answer to that tricky question.

It may not be completely true but anything less creates butthurt...

Olivia, memorize these answers....10, peeing in the shower is a filthy, barbaric practice, I floss every night.

 

Edited August 25, 2020 by humbleopinion

[Yeah No]

4 hours ago, Boo Boo said:

Karen reacted to him before she married him based on him being "too emotional" on Instagram.  I wouldn't take stock in how she is reacting to him based on that and her view of masculinity.

She may soften up to him when she realizes she shouldn't judge a book by its cover, or one emotional instagram video.  I find it interesting that his mother cautioned her against judging him too quickly based on his being open about himself emotionally like other people have done.  I forget exactly what she said but it was very much relevant to this.  It seems like Karen let that go in one ear and out the other.  I hope as time goes on he looks better and better to her as she (and we) get to know him.

3 hours ago, seacliffsal said:

Has anyone found Miles' instagram stories that upset Karen?  I don't have an instagram account and am not sure how to find his account.  I think we would have a much better idea of Karen's expectations and Miles' behavior if we saw his stories.  Anyone?  Bueller?

I doubt anyone has because they have all shut down their social media accounts on orders from the show to do so.  I know they didn't used to require it but recently that has changed.  I am still hoping some internet sleuth with skills better than mine will find it somewhere.

[LuvMyShows]

6 hours ago, humbleopinion said:

Inside Olivia’s brain....

If Brett bangs on the third date then why haven’t we been humping since we got to Xcaret?
Why hasn’t he slipped in between the sheets naked after the camera crew leaves...let’s be honest he is not a sweatpants and tee shirt as pjs type guy...he’s a full commando dude...
I should just jump him...haven’t had sexy time in 3 and a half year without a battery powered friend and my itch needs to be scratched....

Why is he treating me like his aunt...if I am so damn wonderful then let’s get down and dirty government boy......rawr...

From the editing we have seen, they haven't had any conversations specifically about being physical with each other (not about sex).  If it were me, I would be having that conversation pretty soon if I was in any way attracted to this new spouse.  

Loved the bolded description, not only because it is accurate, but because it took me waaaay back to someone I met through on-line dating years ago...we had dinner and it went great, lots of back and forth, and he seemed interested in me...then he walked me to my car and gave me a hug which I characterized to myself with that exact wording: "like his aunt".  I was bummed, but his message came through loud and clear! 

[humbleopinion]

Do you think BOlivia will get around to having sexy time over the next 7 weeks...of course, it has to be on one of the days that Olivia is not too tired from work or from  talking to her Mother and after her daily visit to Heather and Jo......

😄 if Yes

😢 if No

 

[Ilovepie]

1 hour ago, humbleopinion said:

Do you think BOlivia will get around to having sexy time over the next 7 weeks...of course, it has to be on one of the days that Olivia is not too tired from work or from  talking to her Mother and after her daily visit to Heather and Jo......

😄 if Yes

😢 if No

 

This is a tricky one: Are they being all tight lipped and secretive because they have already done it, or because there is nothing going on there? I'm going to go with a Yes, but it won't be a happy situation. Just ask Sonia or Kate, the other secret sex queens......

[humbleopinion]

1 hour ago, Ilovepie said:

I'm going to go with a Yes, but it won't be a happy situation. Just ask Sonia or Kate, the other secret sex queens......

If the second couples' happy hour did not happen and Olivia hadn't hurt Brett's tender feelings then Brett may have reached for Olivia to bump uglies since it was the last night of a romantic honeymoon in the Quintana Roo....

 Brett called Olivia a "wonderful woman" which equals in Brett speak as sex worthy....

She doesn't realize that low balling his score was a very hurtful rejection of him....she's the second woman to kick him in the nuts when he was vulnerable.

Olivia is going to have to woo Brett at home if she wants him. To right the wrong....kiss the hurt.

What may help...

Change her work schedule to get some weekends off so she's home with him.

Invite his obnoxious brothers and familes, especially his parents over.

Tell Heather and Jo you want to prioritize huzz now.

Plenty of Desirous early morning surprise wake ups tunneling under the sheets to his left side of the bed if you get my drift...nudge, nudge, wink, wink....turn up the sexual tension around the house....

Why is she pulling the plow?

Because he trusted her to protect him within the group...she did not and embarrassed him as well...

If she does not make an effort then all the producer stunts and prompts will just be frustrating for the both of them...he will be an exiting Molly when the filming crew goes home for the night....

 

 

Edited August 25, 2020 by humbleopinion

[dirtypop90]

12 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I probably have watched way too much of this show and hence find more red flags and reasons to worry about all of them.  I am skeptical about every one of them at this point, except for Bennett and Amelia - somehow they seem to be a success story in the making, similar to Austin and Jessica last season.  I think Miles has tripped my "too good to be true" meter based on how he has been edited - perhaps that is how Karen is reacting to him right now too, and why she looks like she's already decided he's not for her.  I think it would be fantastic if over time both she AND I eventually warm up to him.  I'm really a romantic at heart - I want to see these people succeed!

I’m with ya. I’ve seen too much of this show and reality tv in general. I’m not calling Miles a villain but I’m not calling him Prince Charming either.  Because I’ve seen too many people turn out not to be what they portrayed or their families/friends said they were.  I’m a bachelor fan and I’ve watched several falls from grace. I assume all these people have issues unless proven otherwise because it’s reality tv.

[Kira53]

14 hours ago, Boo Boo said:

On Brett dating after signing up for it, I understand there's a waiting period, but how fair is it to the woman he dated that he's signed up to get married to a stranger?  Maybe he was honest about it and she didn't care, but if you're signing up to get married, why is it so hard to wait out when you find out if you are go or no go?  I would think the producers of the show would prefer they weren't dating b/c he could've easily decided he wanted to pursue a relationship and backed out when the producers gave him the go ahead.

I thought the purpose of MAFS was that these people were striking out in the traditional dating world.  Brett doesn't appear to be striking out.

Until you find "the one" you're striking out. Since Brett was engaged and gave his fiancé a second chance after cheating on him it looks like he really was desirous of getting married. 

13 hours ago, Retired at last said:

I am guessing that Bennett would have been comfortable packing in a backpack or grocery bag. No need for luggage! I am guessing maybe his mother loaned him a suitcase if he needed one.

Didn't Bennett also have a backpack? I seem to recall Amelia with a backpack. I don't think it makes any difference; it's more that Bennett is very comfortable in his own skin as is Amelia even though other people might think they're weird. 

12 hours ago, Boo Boo said:

That reminds me:  I don't think Brett being a "serial dater" is necessarily a bad thing either.  

He's been engaged once before, so clearly he's not just a hook up machine.  I mean, if he's just in it for easy 3rd date sex, that's one thing.  But if he's dating until he finds the right one, isn't that what we're supposed to do?

That said, I still think if you've signed up fro "getting married" show, there's no purpose to dating other than hooking up.  I mean, unless the decision on casting takes a long time and you don't think you'll get it.

Why would anyone think that they're going to get a match? Do you really think the casting decision does not take a long time from when you first talk to the producers or the interviewers? I don't think there's any reason to not be dating unless or until you have a match. I'm sure there are other people who weren't dating because they don't date that's why they're on the show.  Olivia??  Her not dating for 3 1/2 years?  Wasn't that a red flag?  Maybe Olivia really hasn't wanted a real partner just someone to go to events with. At least Brett was trying.  I'm not saying I like Brett or Olivia.  Unfortunately a person that dates all the time being matched with someone who hasn't dated in 3 1/2 years really looks like a bad match at this point.  Nonetheless I'm really interested to see how they deal with their cats trying to come to live together. Cats don't always like to have new brothers or sisters and owners usually favor their own animals. In Covid that could be amusing.

[Yeah No]

52 minutes ago, Kira53 said:

Until you find "the one" you're striking out. Since Brett was engaged and gave his fiancé a second chance after cheating on him it looks like he really was desirous of getting married. 

Didn't Bennett also have a backpack? I seem to recall Amelia with a backpack. I don't think it makes any difference; it's more that Bennett is very comfortable in his own skin as is Amelia even though other people might think they're weird. 

Why would anyone think that they're going to get a match? Do you really think the casting decision does not take a long time from when you first talk to the producers or the interviewers? I don't think there's any reason to not be dating unless or until you have a match. I'm sure there are other people who weren't dating because they don't date that's why they're on the show.  Olivia??  Her not dating for 3 1/2 years?  Wasn't that a red flag?  Maybe Olivia really hasn't wanted a real partner just someone to go to events with. At least Brett was trying.  I'm not saying I like Brett or Olivia.  Unfortunately a person that dates all the time being matched with someone who hasn't dated in 3 1/2 years really looks like a bad match at this point.  Nonetheless I'm really interested to see how they deal with their cats trying to come to live together. Cats don't always like to have new brothers or sisters and owners usually favor their own animals. In Covid that could be amusing.

I agree with you about Olivia not dating for 3.5 years might reveal something about her that might not be all that ideal.  She could have been really hurt and not that open to finding a new relationship as a result.  We really don't know the circumstances of her 3.5 year hiatus, but that IS a long time for someone her age.  As for Brett dating up until he had a match chosen - well, I wonder just what he knew at that point.  Did he know he made it to a "final round"?  Did he know he had been chosen for a potential match IF they could find him one?  I don't think we know how far along in the process he was and how much he knew about his status.  It sounds like he kept dating up until they found him a match, but I would be surprised if he didn't know he was a finalist to be matched.  If that's the case I would think he would have at least slowed down somewhat, but he admits he had something like 3 dates with one woman that went very well and that he would have had another one if not for finding out he had been matched.  That's one reason to slow down or quit dating if you know you've made it to the final group of potential matches, precisely because you don't want to end up in that kind of situation.  Didn't we already have something similar in a previous season with a woman whose name is escaping me at this late hour?  

[Boo Boo]

7 hours ago, Kira53 said:

Until you find "the one" you're striking out. Since Brett was engaged and gave his fiancé a second chance after cheating on him it looks like he really was desirous of getting married. 

Didn't Bennett also have a backpack? I seem to recall Amelia with a backpack. I don't think it makes any difference; it's more that Bennett is very comfortable in his own skin as is Amelia even though other people might think they're weird. 

Why would anyone think that they're going to get a match? Do you really think the casting decision does not take a long time from when you first talk to the producers or the interviewers? I don't think there's any reason to not be dating unless or until you have a match. I'm sure there are other people who weren't dating because they don't date that's why they're on the show.  Olivia??  Her not dating for 3 1/2 years?  Wasn't that a red flag?  Maybe Olivia really hasn't wanted a real partner just someone to go to events with. At least Brett was trying.  I'm not saying I like Brett or Olivia.  Unfortunately a person that dates all the time being matched with someone who hasn't dated in 3 1/2 years really looks like a bad match at this point.  Nonetheless I'm really interested to see how they deal with their cats trying to come to live together. Cats don't always like to have new brothers or sisters and owners usually favor their own animals. In Covid that could be amusing.

True, it is probably a long process from application, to interviews, to the actual call.  

[Alexander Pope]

11 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I agree with you about Olivia not dating for 3.5 years might reveal something about her that might not be all that ideal.  She could have been really hurt and not that open to finding a new relationship as a result.  We really don't know the circumstances of her 3.5 year hiatus, but that IS a long time for someone her age.  As for Brett dating up until he had a match chosen - well, I wonder just what he knew at that point.  Did he know he made it to a "final round"?  Did he know he had been chosen for a potential match IF they could find him one?  I don't think we know how far along in the process he was and how much he knew about his status.  It sounds like he kept dating up until they found him a match, but I would be surprised if he didn't know he was a finalist to be matched.  If that's the case I would think he would have at least slowed down somewhat, but he admits he had something like 3 dates with one woman that went very well and that he would have had another one if not for finding out he had been matched.  That's one reason to slow down or quit dating if you know you've made it to the final group of potential matches, precisely because you don't want to end up in that kind of situation.  Didn't we already have something similar in a previous season with a woman whose name is escaping me at this late hour?  

Maybe you are thinking of Katie who was in contact with her ex right before her wedding and kept fantasizing about him while married?  and got back together with him briefly after it was over I think?

[lauralu]

On 8/22/2020 at 10:59 AM, antfitz said:

 I think Karen better be very careful. While I feel sorry for miles and his situation, clinical depression is around 50% hereditary. So if she has children with him, she has a very strong chance of having children that are  also clinically depressed. That is not a minor thing. And that should have been told to her before not after the wedding.  The clinically depressed often self medicate with alcohol or drugs.  I would not want to raise children that I would constantly have to be fearful of their indulging in drugs and alcohol.  While many children get involved with drugs or alcohol, this would be a much bigger problem for someone clinically depressed.

Well I hope she does an upfront questionnaire to every person she ever dates from this point on because there is a very very good chance that she will encounter another guy with either diagnosed or undiagnosed depression.  Depression is real and it is scary and it can be genetic but so can lots of things that we don't have the knowledge of upfront.   I'm willing to bet she interacts all day long with people currently that have depression that she has no idea of.  Quite honestly I find her dull as a doorknob and insecure as well, maybe she has some of her own issues that she isn't being honest about. I mean which is better a guy who is upfront and honest about his issue and willing to work on them or a really "masculine, mentally stable" guy who knocks up other women while dating her. I think she's confused and likes shitty men. He can do better IMHO

 

Edited August 26, 2020 by lauralu

[Rae Spellman]

On 8/25/2020 at 12:47 PM, humbleopinion said:

Do you think BOlivia will get around to having sexy time over the next 7 weeks...of course, it has to be on one of the days that Olivia is not too tired from work or from  talking to her Mother and after her daily visit to Heather and Jo.

Probably. They'll have plenty of time while sheltering in place together. Especially if both of them are mostly working from home. Even if they don't like each other and plan to divorce, they've admitted to being attracted to each other and if they are upfront about what it is, it could be a good stress reliever.

Olivia may not be able to do some of the things she usually does after work. She said she talks to her mother on the way to work. So that won't take much time. Even if it changes from a call in the car to a call before starting work. If Heather and Jo aren't coworkers and they are all strictly abiding by shelter in place she may take a break from seeing them. 

Brett said they weren't going to share that information with the other couples though.  

3 hours ago, lauralu said:

Quite honestly I find her dull as a doorknob and insecure as well, maybe she has some of her own issues that she isn't being honest about. I mean which is better a guy who is upfront and honest about his issue and willing to work on them or a really "masculine, mentally stable" guy who knocks up other women while dating her. I think she's confused and likes shitty men. He can do better IMHO

Karen's definition of masculine might be something along the lines of trustworthy, mature, respected, composed, achiever. She said she wanted to be part of a power couple. Maybe she's looking for a guy who runs something. Miles is a former athlete, family oriented, and an up and coming school leader. Those characteristics read pretty masculine to me. Unfortunately, instead of noticing that, Karen may be focusing on Miles' youth and emotional Instagram stories.

Karen's ex could be toxically masculine, lying, serial cheater. Or he could be someone who seemed nice, but had a fling and the other woman got pregnant. Karen may not know what she needs. But, she probably doesn't think she likes payers, either.

 

 

[humbleopinion]

On 8/25/2020 at 11:30 PM, Yeah No said:

 That's one reason to slow down or quit dating if you know you've made it to the final group of potential matches, precisely because you don't want to end up in that kind of situation.  Didn't we already have something similar in a previous season with a woman whose name is escaping me at this late hour?  

Is Kate the woman whose name eludes you?

She accompanied her friend Meg to a speed dating event that Luke organized and he remembered meeting her while she forgot meeting Puke which irritated him to no end.....

[Lindz]

On 8/19/2020 at 6:12 PM, Elizzikra said:

Maybe the episode was sponsored by the American Dental Association?

i really want Karen to redefine “masculine” and wake up to what a great catch Miles is. Girl you don’t want the kind of “masculine” that knocks up his side chick while he’s dating you...

 

She's so judgey. Has Miles questioned what's wrong with her to have so few relationships, one being with a cheater? She takes things he says as negatives & he apparently hasn't done the same. Not the way to be. Appreciate the information & delve deeper, don't freak out & create doubt. 

Edited August 31, 2020 by Lindz
Annoying tunnel vision

[Lindz]

YESSSSSSSS BRETT with the sarcasm!! WHO CARES IF YOU'RE BOTHERED CHRISTINA??!! Worry about your "5" marriage! 😂😂 Totally on Brett's side. He cracked me up.

[Lindz]

YAYYYYYYY! No dumpster fire honeymoons like last season. Brett's shutdown was minor. Olivia's frustration was too much when she apparently didn't even ask the DIRECT question of what was wrong. She's very individualistic. She needs to join the team already.

[Lindz]

Sounds like Christina wants to be showered with compliments & worshipped. Very needy. Not a good look. WHERE are all those guys now?? She needs to get over herself & get her mind right on building a marriage.

[Lindz]

Haven't seen Amelia & Bennett kissing & I'm okay with that. Kinda don't want to. 😅

[gonecrackers]

11 hours ago, Lindz said:

She's so judgey. Has Miles questioned what she did to cause that guy to cheat?? Not saying she did anything, just showing the contrast of her taking the things he says as negatives & he apparently hasn't done the same.

Classic blame the victim mentality - no one does anything to cause someone to cheat. If there's a problem you work it out or leave, period.

[Boo Boo]

10 hours ago, Lindz said:

Sounds like Christina wants to be showered with compliments & worshipped. Very needy. Not a good look. WHERE are all those guys now?? She needs to get over herself & get her mind right on building a marriage.

They became her 5 year fuck buddies after convincing her she's gorgeous.

[Lindz]

Dear God No raising kids like it's a safe world! STRANGER DANGER!! Although, they did marry as strangers... 😅 Still. Think of the children! This is where I'm not with the hippie thing.