S01.E08: Fairytale ends

[Rhondinella]

Sir narrows down his choice of ladies from three to one and has to finally reveal the truth about his charade.

 

 

From Hulu.

 

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[Cramps]

Totally predictable and probably scripted. Didn't seem like production let him pick the girl he was actually the most interested in. Wish we got a reunion episode where the other women learned the truth.

[Toaster Strudel]

Oh boy I feel so sorry for Kelley (she's so child-like and annoying).  She banged her head for him and shoveled the most manure.  She should have been FakePrincess.

 

Karina is a board-certified gold-digger.  He totally wanted to do her when he said goodbye.

[Almost 3000]

Kim: What do I call Kingsley?

Matt: Kingsley

hee...

[RealityGal]

Oh boy I feel so sorry for Kelley (she's so child-like and annoying).  She banged her head for him and shoveled the most manure.  She should have been FakePrincess.

 

Karina is a board-certified gold-digger.  He totally wanted to do her when he said goodbye.

I get the feeling either Prince Harry or Matt will be seeing her in the future, or at least she will be seeing one of them, through a high powered lens, in a tree, when they least expect it.  That girl wants her fairy tale.  She sort of reminds me of Morello on Orange is the New Black.

[Skittl1321]

I found it really odd that Kelley's entire date was her trying to tattle on the other girls to get him to pick her.  She really came off as insane.  What is the "right reason" to go on a low rent reality show?

 

Karina's date also kind of made me laugh. First it was funny to see tourists taking pictures of them- but likely because they were on a TV show, not because he was Prince Harry.  Second- because what the HELL would body guards in adjacent bubbles on that Ferris wheel be able to do? Stationing on the landing platform seems to make a lot more sense.

 

Did Kelley get eliminated first because she made out with him least, or because she was most likely to be a crazy stalker? Because either seem valid. Karina clearly got eliminated because she was in love with luxury, and he knows he can't provide that.

 

You know, knowing now that there was a prize, I'm surprised FOX aired the rest of the episodes. Usually the prizes aren't awarded if the show does not air. Of course "a quarter of a million dollars" is like the lowest reality prize ever (split between two!) so maybe FOX didn't care.

 

I like the girl who won. However, having just watched the broadcast episodes, and then the finale- I really have no idea who she is.

Edited June 14, 2014 by Skittl1321

[Toaster Strudel]

Very disappointing not to see the reactions of the women that were lied to.

Kelley's tattling was funny, and FakeHarry condemned it - only to use the information later!!!

[RealityGal]

I found it really odd that Kelley's entire date was her trying to tattle on the other girls to get him to pick her.  She really came off as insane.  What is the "right reason" to go on a low rent reality show?

 

 

Did Kelley get eliminated first because she made out with him least, or because she was most likely to be a crazy stalker? Because either seem valid. Karina clearly got eliminated because she was in love with luxury, and he knows he can't provide that.

 

You know, knowing now that there was a prize, I'm surprised FOX aired the rest of the episodes. Usually the prizes aren't awarded if the show does not air. Of course "a quarter of a million dollars" is like the lowest reality prize ever (split between two!) so maybe FOX didn't care.

 

I like the girl who won. However, having just watched the broadcast episodes, and then the finale- I really have no idea who she is.

 

I think with Kelley - she was kept around until the finale because she was just so dedicated.  I feel like the producers felt like a lot of young girls could sympathize.  Yeah - she is a little crazy, and she isn't the prettiest girl in the room, she isn't the girl with the best education or the coolest job, but she is mostly just earnest and sweet until the end.  But, I think that crazy stalker vibe is why she couldn't be the winner, I feel like even if she stayed with Matt, she would want to get married right away, and he would likely want to enjoy his "fame" with the other ladies around England....and she would go crazy stalker.

 

LOL - I think $250,000 may have been what they found in Ryan Seacrest's couch cushions.  It was almost sad, I realize its a lot of prize money, but after taxes that won't go very far in New York/New Jersey and it will barely make a dent in a London lifestyle.  

 

As for the girl that won - I found it strange that she couldn't stop laughing.  Laughing like that is something I normally do as an automatic response to being in an uncomfortable situation.

[PityFree]

Yay! My favorite won! I am not surprised because Karina's screech-y voice would make any man run after a few dates.

Now, FOX? Calling $250k "a quarter of a million" over and over doesn't make it seem like a bigger prize. Cheapskates.

and poor misguided, bunny-boiling, kelley... men love when women stir drama and tattle. Wait! No they don't.

Very disappointing not to see the reactions of the women that were lied to!

Exactly! I wanted to know what the other girls thought of the lie. Dummy producers!

Edited June 14, 2014 by PityFree

[Cramps]

Didn't Joe Millionaire at least get five hundred thousand as the - they stayed together prize?

Also did Not Prince Harry's Hair get redder again for the finale?

[ShaNaeNae]

Corniest ending ever.

[PityFree]

Didn't Joe Millionaire at least get five hundred thousand as the - they stayed together prize?

Yup! The couple got a full $1 million to split, so $500,000 each.

[RealityGal]

Corniest ending ever.

 

I can't believe you find two people who barely know each other riding off on a bicycle built for two corny.  Are you sure you were watching the right show?  Maybe you were watching Game of Thrones, now THAT was a corny ending.  

 

Just Kidding!

[ShaNaeNae]

I can't believe you find two people who barely know each other riding off on a bicycle built for two corny.  Are you sure you were watching the right show?  Maybe you were watching Game of Thrones, now THAT was a corny ending.  

 

Just Kidding!

 

I know, I know. I should have been crying happy tears and it should have renewed my faith in honest men and falling in love. What is wrong with me?  haha

 

Yeah, the bike built for two was just part of it. The whole reveal with snow falling, snow not falling, couple covered in snow, all dusted off and that inconsistency, the romantic movie music blaring, her giggling saying, "It doesn't matter you're not a prince!" and the whole fireworks show was just too much.  The only thing that would have made it better was if Kelley was the final girl. She could talk with her thumb pointing behind her like she always does, proclaim she's here for the right reasons and will do whatever it takes and tell him, "you're not real, so you can just get the heck out" with her thumb pointing behind her like she "told" Megan in a TH.

 

And Lord, Kelley, Kelley. She proclaimed on an earlier episode she's never been in love. I'm going to take it that she's probably a virgin and her last relationship was the 5th grade. Yes, Kelley, we girls usually talk about how hot ex's are, or might check out their Facebook pages on occasion. That doesn't mean we can't fall in love with someone else or we'll cheat on them. Don't be such a tattle.

[Toaster Strudel]

FakeHarry has been desperately wanting to boff Karina 24/7 and all night long from the moment he laid eyes on her, he was even playing with her hair when saying his goodbyes.  Not matter who slept in the Clown Suite, FakeHarry was wanking to Karina and Karina alone.

 

He never cared for Kelley at all, he's a working man, she's in a mental kindergarten. 

 

Kimberley was the boring producer's choice between those two extremes.

[ShaNaeNae]

I am having a good laugh at Kimberley's Twitter. No one has mentioned who she is, so she posts "Can't stop watching #MarryHarry!"  Then, she's got the kind of fans that think the best person should "win" these kind of reality shows. One fan even said she had tears rolling down her face while watching. Oh God. I feel bad for some people. I just do.

[Almost 3000]

From Kimberly Birch's Facebook:

About.

Kimberly Birch is an actress and producer known for Beach Pillows (2013), Blue Suede (2014), and the FOX reality hit "I Wanna Marry Harry."

Description
New York-based Kimberly Birch is a social worker, actress, and producer known for Beach Pillows (2013), Score: Own The Night (20140, Blue Suede (2014), and the FOX reality hit "I Wanna Marry Harry."

For press and booking information, please contact keith@hartagencyny.com.

 

[PityFree]

From Kimberly Birch's Facebook:

About.

Kimberly Birch is an actress...

Boooooo! OMG Is everything in the world fake???? Are all of them actors? She wasn't a social worker?? Struggling to get by in the big city? Ugh! I trusted you, Kimberly!

 

If Matt the Environmental Consultant turns out to be a professional celebrity impersonator (of ActualHarry, of course) it will make me so sad and jaded. 

 

By the way, I like how he got a promotion from oil-spill-cleaner-upper to Environmental Consultant for the finale. 

[Wordsworth]

Unfortunately, a lot of reality show participants are aspiring actors or actresses.  Back in the day, it was game shows that actors went on when they were trying to hit it big.  Not to say that everyone who appears on a reality show, or even a game show, is trying to break into show businesses, but quite a few of them are.

 

 

[Almost 3000]

If Matt the Environmental Consultant turns out to be a professional celebrity impersonator (of ActualHarry, of course) it will make me so sad and jaded.

By the way, I like how he got a promotion from oil-spill-cleaner-upper to Environmental Consultant for the finale.

 

@PityFree

First, I noticed they upgraded him from ditch digger to Consultant and second I was leaning to him not being an entertainment pro but now maybe a hopeful because of the show. I'd be disappointed if he is an actor because they could have set it up that way in the beginning like Joe Shmoe and it would have been a MUCH better show.

[ShaNaeNae]

If Matt the Environmental Consultant turns out to be a professional celebrity impersonator (of ActualHarry, of course) it will make me so sad and jaded. 

 

By the way, I like how he got a promotion from oil-spill-cleaner-upper to Environmental Consultant for the finale. 

 

I do remember reading before the series started that he had done some impersonation work. I got the impression it was like those dinner parties that people invite celebrity look-alikes so guests feel like they are really having dinner with Marilyn Monroe and Prince Harry. I'll have to do some Googling.

 

But, don't worry, by next week he'll be an Environment Engineer!

 

I had to look up Kelley because I do recall her saying she lives in NYC (but is from Alabama). Found her LinkedIn and it said her career is "Motion Pictures and Films". I can't sign in because I'm at work, but if anyone else can, maybe you can read more about it (I'm guessing it's showing me limited information since I'm not signed in). I also notice she took down her Twitter. I think the teasing and the constant rude (and sometimes funny) comments Megan has been twating her way has gotten to her.

[Toaster Strudel]

From Kelley's LinkedIn:
 

Researcher at "Katie"

    New York, New York
    Motion Pictures and Film

Current

    The "Katie" Couric Show - Disney ABC Television Group

Previous

    Button Up Sunshine LLC,
    Saddle Ranch Chop House,
    "Hell's Kitchen" - Fox Television

She also worked on "Ellen"

[Padma]

I watched -- but I'm so confused. Was Matt a "ditch digger" as the press releases say or an "environmental consultant" as he told Kimberly (whom I never realized was on this show until nearly the finale--Where did she come from and why can't I remember anything about her from ep 1-5?

 

Was Kelley an actress who was acting the whole time? ITA that the one he was interested in from the beginning was Karina, but she would have probably gone nuts at the deception, not taken it well for the cameras like KimWho did. Was Rose an actress too? I can't imagine genuinely "figuring it out" and not talking about it with the others.

 

This was a mess and I'm glad it tanked, but I can't help feeling that I'm the one who's been punked.

[Skittl1321]

 

Unfortunately, a lot of reality show participants are aspiring actors or actresses.

 

Yeah, I don't think this means she was acting on the show. More likely she was doing anything she could to get on TV.

[Ceruleana]

Horrible ending, beyond frommage.  Riding off on a tandem bike?  LOL

 

Totally annoyed that he didn't end up with Karina, he had the best chemistry with her.  How did Matt figure that she was the one most into luxury?  Weren't they all?  If anything, Kelley was the one obsessed with being a princess.

 

Hated Kelley and Meghan not being in the final 3--that would have been a shitstorm for the ages.

 

I thought Kim was pleasant, but her ending up with Matt reeked of producer.  She was totally boring.

[RealityGal]

I know, I know. I should have been crying happy tears and it should have renewed my faith in honest men and falling in love. What is wrong with me?  haha

 

Yeah, the bike built for two was just part of it. The whole reveal with snow falling, snow not falling, couple covered in snow, all dusted off and that inconsistency, the romantic movie music blaring, her giggling saying, "It doesn't matter you're not a prince!" and the whole fireworks show was just too much.  The only thing that would have made it better was if Kelley was the final girl. She could talk with her thumb pointing behind her like she always does, proclaim she's here for the right reasons and will do whatever it takes and tell him, "you're not real, so you can just get the heck out" with her thumb pointing behind her like she "told" Megan in a TH.

 

And Lord, Kelley, Kelley. She proclaimed on an earlier episode she's never been in love. I'm going to take it that she's probably a virgin and her last relationship was the 5th grade. Yes, Kelley, we girls usually talk about how hot ex's are, or might check out their Facebook pages on occasion. That doesn't mean we can't fall in love with someone else or we'll cheat on them. Don't be such a tattle.

 

LOL - you say too much, I say never enough!  I feel like Fox should have sprung for a Unicorn....dusted in snow, then they could have flown off into a magical tomorrow....where ditch diggers are environmental consultants, and women who appear to be in their early 40's magically turn 22!

 

Besides, the sappy music just lets you know that this romance is REAL!  Not based on some dude wanting to get laid, and some out of work actress hoping to get a gig, no man, when the music plays you know that this is real love.

 

Kelley strikes me as the sort of girl that may just show up in Matt's life one day and say all of those things, probably standing over him while he is sleeping with a knife in her hand.  Now thats real romance.....just kidding (sorry - I never know when people are going to take my sarcasm at face value).

 

And you can't blame Kelley, she seemed to really think she was gonna tattle her way right into Buckingham Palace.  Her and her daisy dukes would be having tea with Prince Charles and the Queen.

[PityFree]

I thought NotHarry's penis had chemistry with Karina.

Edited June 17, 2014 by PityFree

[ShaNaeNae]

And you can't blame Kelley, she seemed to really think she was gonna tattle her way right into Buckingham Palace.  Her and her daisy dukes would be having tea with Prince Charles and the Queen.

 

Oh she thought she'd arrange a 'girls night in'.  First, she'd give the Queen, Camilla and Kate square dancing lessons. Then they'd all gather to watch The Notebook while drinking Root Beer Floats. Then they'd have girl talk while laying in their sleeping bags on the floor and they'd all ask her about life as a southern belle. 

 

 

Hated Kelley and Meghan not being in the final 3--that would have been a shitstorm for the ages.

 

 

 

Kelley was final 3.

 

I still can't believe she works for "Katie". Didn't it get cancelled?

 

Thanks Toaster Strudel for posting what is on her page.

[RealityGal]

Oh she thought she'd arrange a 'girls night in'.  First, she'd give the Queen, Camilla and Kate square dancing lessons. Then they'd all gather to watch The Notebook while drinking Root Beer Floats. Then they'd have girl talk while laying in their sleeping bags on the floor and they'd all ask her about life as a southern belle. 

 

 

But maybe they could take a break to backflip off the side of a canoe?  Or they could go all Thelma and Louise in a big 'ol American car in a country where gas is like $12/gallon.

[RealityGal]

This was a mess and I'm glad it tanked, but I can't help feeling that I'm the one who's been punked.

 

This.  Bad reality TV is for me, the viewer, to watch and judge a bunch of girls for being dummies.  Its no fun if they are in on it.  

[Padma]

Oh she thought she'd arrange a 'girls night in'.  First, she'd give the Queen, Camilla and Kate square dancing lessons. Then they'd all gather to watch The Notebook while drinking Root Beer Floats. Then they'd have girl talk while laying in their sleeping bags on the floor and they'd all ask her about life as a southern belle.

 

And what's a party with the Queen without some good old fashioned twerking?

 

I did laugh when--I think it was Kelley--started gushing with excitement about "experiencing a toga party the way Prince Harrry has them!" Then he came out in a costume that looked like something a ten year old's mother put together for a school play and they sat in cheap chairs in a tacky undecorated room and played games with a cardboard spinner. Yes! Toga parties just like the Queen's!

[Ceruleana]

Kelley was final 3.

 

Blah, I meant that I wanted Karina, Kelley, and Meghan together in the final 3.  Kelley and Meghan would have been good reality TV!  *shakes fist*  And it should have ended with Matt having to choose between Karina and Meghan.  Stupid producers. *scowls*  I mean, they kept Kelley there forever and a day, even though it was clear that she made Matt's penis cringe.

[Amarsir]

I'm not surprised Kim won, nor that no one remembers who she is.  Kimberly was the humble one in the background who kept saying she'd never had a guy do anything nice for her.  Her date was the picnic in the woods with the first appearance of fake paparazzi.  (Hilarious recap here.)  I think she fits the producers' stereotype of "average girl who just wants love", because for some unknowable reason they took themselves seriously this whole time.

 

Totally annoyed that he didn't end up with Karina, he had the best chemistry with her.  How did Matt figure that she was the one most into luxury?  Weren't they all?  

Karina's the one most likely to get luxury.  Whether she's specifically a gold-digger or not, her dating pool is going to be a higher caliber of guys.  Out of everyone on this show, she's the only one I could picture on someone's arm walking down a red carpet.

 

I thought Kim was pleasant, but her ending up with Matt reeked of producer.  She was totally boring.

 

True, but in fairness so was he.

[Skittl1321]

I do think that Matt probably picked Kim on his own.

 

For me, it looked like Karina represented to him the type of goddess that he would only dream of. He wanted to pick a girl who might actually like him for him.  So on the show, he absolutely wanted to spend all the time possible making out with Karina (though why didn't she get crown suite twice?), but in real life- she's not even in his league.  Kim is in his league if he could catch her attention: the show made that happen, and then he seems like a neat enough guy that she would "stay" with him. 

 

Of course the living on two continents thing, I doubt they even gave 'together' a second thought.

[Toaster Strudel]

I'll eat my hat if Km and FakeHarry even exchanged phone numbers after the show.

[legaleagle53]

From Kimberly Birch's Facebook:

 

"The FOX reality HIT?"  Excuse me while I collapse in hysterical laughter over that one!

[Kromm]

"The FOX reality HIT?"  Excuse me while I collapse in hysterical laughter over that one!

I think the phrase "HIT" when referring to TV shows these days means "it got on the air"!

[RealityGal]

I'll eat my hat if Km and FakeHarry even exchanged phone numbers after the show.

Its still early in the day - but I think thats the funniest thing I've read all day.  Where is your sense of romance?  They are probably touring all over London on that bicycle built for two.

[Rhondinella]

Oh she thought she'd arrange a 'girls night in'.  First, she'd give the Queen, Camilla and Kate square dancing lessons. Then they'd all gather to watch The Notebook while drinking Root Beer Floats. Then they'd have girl talk while laying in their sleeping bags on the floor and they'd all ask her about life as a southern belle.

 

 

I'm picturing something more like this:

 

[fliptopbox]

Just watching it now. Why do the girls look like they are wearing Victorian nightgowns at the end? WTF?

[Rhondinella]

Yeah, they were wearing Edwardian style gowns at one point (think Downton Abbey).  Is that what you were referring to?  I wondered about that too.

[seacliffsal]

I would love a follow up to this show.  Darn low ratings......  I'd like to know if Kim and Matt even went out after this, and I'd really love to get Kelley's reaction to everything as she KNEW from the beginning that he was really Prince Harry...  I couldn't stand Kelley by the end of this series as she was just too much and too scary.  I agreed with Karina and Kim's assessment of her as scary and basically unstable.

[RealityGal]

I'm picturing something more like this:

 

I wonder how many times that scene was running through Kelley's head. 

 

thanks for posting the clip Rhondinella

Edited June 19, 2014 by RealityGal

[Eolivet]

I do think that Matt probably picked Kim on his own.

 

For me, it looked like Karina represented to him the type of goddess that he would only dream of.

 

I agree. I think he genuinely liked Kim -- he took many opportunities to incidentally touch her leg, or put his arm around her and when they were making out in the hot tub, he turned as red as his fake hair. So, I liked this ending -- I remember hearing that a lot of the contestants who auditioned didn't realize they were going on a dating show. I feel like Kim sort of rolled with the punches: "Oh, he's Prince Harry? OK. Oh, he's not? That's fine, too."

 

Matt had anti-chemistry with Kelley, but a part of me was hoping she'd be kept until the final 2 to produce as large a meltdown as possible.

 

I think Kim had a great time, spent some time with a nice guy and got to live in a fancy estate for several weeks. Not too shabby a vacation. I did like that, unlike the fakery of "The Bachelor," they didn't really try and pretend those two were getting married at the end. I suppose they could've called it "Win a Potential Relationship with Prince Harry," but that wouldn't have had the same ring to it.

 

Oh, and "You still have a British accent, though?" made the episode. Highly entertaining summer reality. Like Kim, I'm just left laughing.

[Rhondinella]

I wonder how many times that scene was running through Kelley's head.

 

 

I'm pretty sure the entirety of her knowledge about European royalty is based on The Princess Diaries, Enchanted and Ever After.

[Skittl1321]

 

Oh, and "You still have a British accent, though?"

 

I saw one interview with him where he was asked if he knew he could use his accent to get dates with Americans. He said something like "people had told me that, but I didn't take it seriously, but after this experience I realized just the accent could get me pretty far."

 

Sadly, he isn't wrong about that for many American women.

[JenE4]

I was pretty disappointed that Krazy Kelly didn't lose her mind when she was eliminated. And Karina didn't even make a peep! Come on! After sitting through 8 hours of this, we DESERVE to see someone freaking out about being lied to!

I did love that the prop department saved the majority of their budget for the winter wonderland. That was just like a movie...I'm sure Kelly would have told us which one if she were there.

My favorite moment of the show was when Kelly asked Matt if he knew what was in Karina's wallet and he said that he didn't want to know and she shouldn't go around talking out of turn (basically). And the look on her face as she was stewing and trying to think of a different way to bring up Karina's ex. Classic! Oh, Krazy Kelly, you get second place for most entertaining, after Megan, of course.

Any press/online evidence on whether Kim and Matt dated afterward? I know it's not easy being on different continents, but a quarter mil could buy a lot of plane tickets. They did seem very sweet together. I wish those crazy kids the best!

[JenE4]

I forgot to mention last night, Karina HAD to have known that she was going home when she was told to wait in the gazebo, and Kim HAD to have known that she was the top choice when she was told to wait in the winter wonderland. I thought it was hilarious on this show that they went to great lengths to drag out the back-and-forth elimination/Crown Suite picks because the girls and the viewers would never be able to figure it out, and yet the girl who got kicked out ALWAYS waited in the garden, and the girl who got the Crown Suite ALWAYS waited in the drawing room. Seriously, Kingsley said the same thing every week--directing a lady to the drawing room or the garden--and yet these girls NEVER picked up on the fact that the one who was told to go to the garden never returned?! I think the last couple of episodes Kingsley just said, "Sir, would like to see you" without announcing to the other ladies where she was going, but he said it often enough in the first several episodes that they had to have caught on. Full disclosure: It took me until about episode 5 or 6 to realize this myself. D'oh!

[Rhondinella]

Wow, I didn't notice that.  But in fairness I had probably dozed off by that point in each ep.

[Ceruleana]

Anna Lisa was eliminated when she sat with Matt in the drawing room, while Kelley nearly slid off of her chair in the garden from relief when Matt asked her to the Crown Suite.

 

The only reason I remember that is because I just read the Fug Girls' hilarious episode 4 recap, and I remember how ridiculous Kelley was being in that scene.  Utterly ridiculous.

 

Although I wouldn't mind prancing around in Daisy Dukes in front of him myself, so I sort of understand her thirst.

 

*coughs*

 

I need to backflip on over to the Rx for that penicillin 'script...that Kelley is so contagious.  *cough*