KerleyQ

Ford was a skeevy guy in his early to mid 20's who seemed to have a preference for barely legal girls. Among his greatest hits - when Jessica Buchanan had mentally regressed to her teens (after almost being raped by the man she believed to be her biological father), she thought she was still in love with Ford's then roommate - her high school boyfriend, Cristian. She showed up at their apartment one night, upset at having seen Cris kissing his current girlfriend. Ford knew Jessica was mentally ill and not really in her right mind (and that she was involved with someone herself who she didn't remember in the state she was in), but he had sex with her. It was one of those stories Ron loves to tell and then swear up and down "no, that's not rape!" Jessica ended up pregnant, there was a WTD, and Ford ended up being the father. (I'm still telling myself that Jessica and Brody found out the paternity test was wrong and Brody is the father after all, after the show went off the air). Jessica's alter, Tess, came out at some point, and Ford enabled her, marrying her to keep her family from having her committed in exchange for her bringing the baby to live with him. The two of them "fell for" each other (pardon me while I gag), Tess eventually got committed, and when Ford showed up to help her escape, the two of them took down a blind nun and went at it in front of her for a while (because assaulting a nun is hot, apparently) before moving on to the escape. After Jessica was back in control, they even seemed to be toying with having Jess fall for him, until we started to get to the end of the show. Thankfully, towards the end of the show, Ford was killed by a falling chandelier* (and it was awesome). And he was originally just a day player. But he had a scene where he was shirtless and dumped a bucket of water over himself, and since he had a good body, viewers got to talking about the bucket scene, Ron decided he had the next big thing on his hands, and before we knew it, he was on all the time, he had a whole family brought on for him (two brothers, a sinfully boring mother, and the requisite "evil" daddy to give an excuse for why Ford did bad things), and he was the father of a Buchanan baby. *I can't wait for Dr. O's chandelier moment.

What I don't get is Ron's animosity towards the character. From what I recall, wasn't the character initially planned to be really truly dead when Ron got here? And he (and possibly Frank) spoke to KMc about leaving the door open, and she agreed? And she has done her best to sell every shit turn he's given this story. What is his damn issue? Does he resent her because he feels his Patrick/Sabrina plans didn't get a fair shake from the audience? I wish I could "like" this 99 times.

If we have to have Alexis defending Franco, I really hope we get her say that part of what pushed her to agree was his public shaming of Cujo.

Sonny is the master of "why you bringing up old stuff?" It's wrong that I'd watch that show. But I would.

I have this picture of neither of them making a move on the other and both wondering when the other is going to figure out something is up - that Rick is still pissed and is faking the reunion or that Caroline is too into his brother to go jumping Rick's bones.

If Ron was to genuinely go in the "someone else actually finished AJ off" direction, I don't get what the point would be. We saw Sonny shoot AJ on screen. That act isn't diminished by the fact that maybe someone else wandered into AJ's hospital room and injected something into his IV (or whatever Ron will try to claim happened). Sonny willingly (and happily, truth be told) shot an unarmed man in cold blood. Because he couldn't handle that Michael was bonding with his real father. It drove him fucking nuts that his property was spending time with AJ. Yeah, yeah, he thought AJ killed Connie, but he couldn't have picked Connie out of a police lineup in that moment. And he already believed AJ killed Connie when he promised Michael that he wouldn't try to take him out. He wanted AJ dead (has wanted AJ dead since Michael was a baby), and he took action to make that so. If AJ hadn't been lying in a hospital bed, weakened and vulnerable, thanks to Sonny's bullet, then some other person wouldn't have had that opportunity to finish him off. It'll be beyond idiotic if anyone who is pissed at Sonny goes "oh, well, it was someone else who finished what you started? Then we can all totally forget that you shot an unarmed man because you're a pissy little asshole. Let's organize a St. Sonny's Day parade, stat!" BTW, if Guza was still writing, it would totally be Julian who finished him off, because a rival for Sonny who gets too much positive viewer attention always gets thrown in under that bus.

Maybe if Lucas gets out of Carly's house, the beast won't be his daily baseline of human behavior, and he'll raise his standards to find someone better than Brad.

As far as Sonny and Ava knew, AJ was dead, so I still count it, even if he turns out to be alive (which I'm not holding my breath for).

I can't remember the exact line, but it was something about how Ava being caught and thrown in jail wasn't his first choice of how to handle the situation, but it was acceptable for now. And, yep, he's already in jail for killing one person, and instead of maybe realizing that killing is bad or having some remorse, he's just pissed he didn't get one more kill under his belt before getting locked up. "To show I'm not completely heartless, here, you can have my couch." And I just envision the mob flunkies who are holding Ric laughing hysterically when Shawn shows up waving a gun and threatening to shoot them if they don't hand over Ric. "We've heard all about you, go ahead and shoot us. Give it a try." I had a moment of fear, when Silas told Ava that Carly was helping out, that she'd follow up "hateful bitch" with "but she's a good mother." So glad to see she didn't endorse Carly's parenting so much as acknowledge that she has, in fact, parented. And Lord, seeing the baby in the clutches of that beast Cujo? I think I'd rather see the kid with Nina and Franco again. Loved Ava and Sonny both being like "oh, crap, those two are taking care of the kid? They can barely remember to breathe, how can they take care of a baby?" Those Sam/Jason scenes were weird. Everything seemed off - the writing, the direction, the staging, and the performances from both KeMo and BM. Just weird to terrible all the way around. Edited to add - was I the only one who thought those scenes about the DNA test being run through Carly were overly detailed to the point that they have to be setting up something? The way they emphasized "If Carly isn't related to the baby then Sonny is the father," made me think something wonky is coming up. Morgan switched at birth?

I'll be pissed if Michael forgives Sonny and Carly over that kind of technicality. He shot AJ. Whether that bullet killed him or someone came into his room while he was already down from Sonny's bullet and finished him off, Sonny pulled the trigger and AJ eventually died. Michael begged him multiple times to not go after AJ. Sonny promised, and he stewed and moaned and groaned until he had an opportunity to do it anyway (and it was totally justified in his mind). Then he lied about it for months, tried to be there for Michael in his grief, and then banged Ava literally over AJ's dead body. And when he found out that AJ was no, in fact, responsible for Connie's murder, he kept quiet instead of giving Michael the peace of knowing AJ was definitely innocent. Because it conflicted with his own agenda. I hope Sonny goes to him, blathering about how "I didn't kill AJ after all, Son," and Michael scoffs, tells him not to call him "son" and then gets Alice (or ELQ security, depending on where this occurs) to "escort Mr. Corinthos out."

If that sad little performance gets Eric to sign the papers... I can't even. I hope Bill's first order of business when he moves back in with Katie is to burn that poetry book along with the red string. Let's just never speak of the "pomes" and that ratty old string again, show. It never happened.

I believe he hung out at a cemetery in Ireland until the rocks spelled out "Africa."

I remember Kelly smoking everyone else on that rope climbing challenge. I think she even surprised herself. Wasn't there someone on the RR side who refused to sign on to the money split? So they were the only one going home with squat? I can't remember who it was, thought.

Best triangle? Really? Even if there were no other triangles in all of soaps (which, let's be real, isn't remotely the case), it would be better to just scrap the category than pretend that the Nathan/Maxie/Levi crap was anything other than week old shit.

We don't call it a "bullet of love" for nothing. I think he was a touch older than her, from what I remember, but they were the same general 2 -3 year age range. I still can't wrap my mind around the fact that it's not OK for Georgie's mother to be romantically involved with a police officer, but it's fine and dandy for Georgie to live with her father, the former mob flunky who still, apparently, breaks the law to help out his friends (from his time as a mob flunky). Is this Judge Bob Guza?

It would be so dumb if Eric is actually stupid enough to sign that form. He should smell the bullshit a mile away with this. I'm going to throw things at my TV if he's genuinely stupid enough to just be all "OK, sure, I'll give you free reign forever and ever 5 minutes after you tried to sabotage the company for your own petty issues. Get my good pen so I can sign this sucker!"

I agree. Whether he'd go through with it or not, telling someone you were fairly recently in a long term relationship with, who you professed to love, that you will kill her, as a means of keeping her in line, is abusive. Not that Sam didn't do a lot of bad shit on her own then, but, I can't see ever going back to someone who had threatened to kill you. You should never want to be with someone when that level of ugliness is a possibility. (And he should have never wanted to be with her, so it goes both ways. They were both awful back then.)

When I got to the line in there about them wanting to find out why the agent is so hellbent on seeing Anna pay for what she did with Faison, it occurred to me - If he ends up being yet another Dr O/Faison spawn, so help me, show...

Think he'll even have a moment's thought about the vow renewal he and Robin did with Emma on NYE last year?

Sam's chock full of hypocrisy when it comes to the whole mob/criminal judgement thing. Julian got a crap ton of shit from her for being in the mob (and for not wanting Sonny to kill him). If I recall correctly, there was even some bullshit line about a mobster not making for a good father. She, Carly, and Olivia are the queens of hypocrisy when it comes to Jason and/or Sonny versus any other "bad guy."

I think it was abusive, no question. That's why I no longer want that retcon. Anybody who mocks their spouse's rape (along with all the other crap Carly pulled) is an abusive asshat, man or woman.

Way back when, I wanted a retcon that Morgan was Jax's kid from exactly that circumstance.

I have no love (or like) for Nina, and she is about 100 pounds of crazy in a 5 pound sack, but I have zero fucks to give for Ava, either. I wish those two would just torture each other off screen. They're both violent criminals. I'd almost say I might prefer Nina, because at least we have the crazy to see why she does the shit she does. Ava's just a bitch who killed someone to keep a secret for her brother that he gave next to no fucks about keeping himself, when all was said and done. Carly, you don't get to cry about all the awful stuff Franco did to your loved ones before you decided you were in wuv with him now that he found out what a beast you are and trotted your dirty (criminal) laundry out for the whole town to enjoy. It says everything anyone needs to know about you that you were fine fucking Franco when his actions led to your son's prison rape (in the most sanitized version of the story) but him not rolling over and letting you fuck Sonny behind his back with nary a "how dare you, madam!" is what gets you in full-on Cujo mode with him. Whatever "serious medical condition" this baby ends up having, it clearly can't be cancer. Silas can diagnose that shit with one quick glance at the patient.

I've wanted this for years.

I thought that was who he was supposed to be when I first saw him. I was surprised when he introduced himself by another name. I loved that wedding sketch way too much. I was in just the right mood for it that, when we got to "Jenga," I lost it.