Sun-Bun

There was one interesting thing about this last episode: Spencer Pratt posted a hilarious live commentary on his Instagram stories. Wish I’d been able to post it all here but I happened to watch it just before it all expired for the day. Turns out KC introduced him to Heidi, so they’re still on rather friendly terms, hence his need to comment on her show. But something about hearing the king of the reality famewhores so knowingly commenting on these losers and their lame antics was oddly endearing.

No offense to all the lovely tall ladies out there, but most gals her height of 5’10 and over have truly hideous, snow-ski esque feet. I’ve probably flipped through way too many fashion magazines in my day, but most every model I’ve seen in them are usually sporting some form of long, flat hooves that don’t fit the rest of their beauty. That being said, not even bothering to get a proper pedicure and leaving a bandaid on one’s toe for a supposedly professional photo shoot in which revealingly sassy shoes are so prominently displayed is disgusting. Kathryn always strikes me as pretty unhygienic and gross underneath all that excess hair and makeup she spackles on regularly; her hands often look similarly grimy and messed up. Beautiful girl and her face is an exquisite makeup canvas, but she sure has some funkyassed hands/feet.

Actually, he should totally do lawyer/legal-themed pillows! Perfect pillows to fit the decor of many a random law firm office or the home of any law professional. Then he’d still be pursuing something vaguely within the law field while still scratching his creative sewing itch—-then maybe he could move into more home decor items with legal-themed blankets or sheets, table-runners, napkins or placemats. It’s just so crazy and random that it might be the niche job that truly fits his skills!

She always seemed so sad and quiet, just a little lost and oddly in her own morose little world when she wasn’t riding horses. It’s like all she did was reminisce upon her fabulous years being a part of the London fashion “it” crowd and mention how much she missed her dear friend Alexander McQueen—-hope those two are happily reconnecting again somehow. Sounds like it’s either an accidental overdose and/or suicide.

Remember several seasons ago when Craig and Naomi were seemingly doing so well living together, Craig was working within JD’s company(which seems kinda hilarious in hindsight now), and he kept going around boasting about “#NewCraig”? Yeah...obviously Naomi was his “ops” person and was cleaning up all his messes while keeping him on track and focused, because Craig’s right back to his haphazard old Season 2 self. I guess he’s one of those folks who definitely needs someone pushing him along and catching him when he falls—-makes me wonder just how much his mom babied him and took care of everything for him when he was growing up. Shep obviously was/is babied by his mom as well, but he has the money and support to make it work for him and is still able to handle his affairs in a timely, professional manner. He shouldn’t have gotten rid of that life coach; someone needs to hold him accountable and call him on his bullshit. He put up with it from Naomi, he barely puts up with it from Cameron, but he sure can’t take it from anyone not close to him.

Some of the typical old monied types and social circles that Patricia moves within are likely aghast over her semi-involvement in this show, but she’s said from the get-go that she only did it for Whitney and always wants to support his endeavors. She’s extremely proud of him and he’s obviously always had a wacky, creative streak, so I don’t doubt their strong family lineage or class—-both are extremely well-educated, well-traveled and well-spoken, so they obviously know how to properly conduct themselves within all sorts of situations and respectable company. It reminds me of a known elder Southern society lady here in my city with an interesting, creative single son whom I know, and they’re like the spirit animals of Patricia and Whitney. They’re both just a little older than Pat and Whit, but she’s a respected style maven, mansion-dweller and socialite a’la Patricia, and he’s a single musician/photographer whom everyone assumes is gay because he’s also into fashion and the arts and traveling the world hanging out with younger gals who may or may not act as his beards. So if they ever decide to do a SC Nashville, I’ve got the hookup for those casting directors!

Sorry you dealt with that—-and maybe one day ALL cars will be outfitted with video cameras to film all those irritating moments on the road with careless drivers. It’s sad that we’re at a point in which regular driver distraction almost requires this as a safety feature. It frustrating beyond belief how many people I see texting/scrolling *while* driving!! Just the other day I was in the left lane and getting beyond frustrated with the driver in front of me driving slower than usual in the lane and weaving a bit. So naturally I go around this buffoon, staring him down as I do so, only to see that his nose is completely buried down into his phone. What an IDIOT. Sadly though, that’s not the first time I’ve seen this happen and it likely won’t be the last. For chrissakes, I can understand maybe quickly checking your phone while at a light or stuck in gridlock, but just typing/scrolling away while driving along like that? I’ll never get it—-and distracted dumbasses like those are the reason we see so many more accidents than we used to on the highways.

He’s a typical pretty young famewhore—-curiosity got the best of me, so I looked him up on Instagram. No wonder I’ve never seen him out and about around here, as he’s an international male model who supposedly does retail/training on the side. And he does indeed come from money: I recognized his dad, who’s the president of HCA. So he’s a rich kid who probably got talked into this gig courtesy of his modeling agency/contacts. Of course. The rest of the cast are similar poseurs from elsewhere who blend in with all the other blandly attractive randoms who move here looking for their country-flavored LA dreams to come true.

I’ve decided that I officially hate “stank redhead” and her giant beaver teeth—-she keeps her mouth constantly open because I’m assuming she has trouble keeping those things covered, plus it allows her to be automatically prone to weird, random outbursts. She currently seems like she’s taking notes straight out of the S1 Stassi Schroeder/“Vanderpump Rules” playbook for this role she’s playing. Also, her flirting style is gross. Pawing at a guy, making googly eyes at him and breathing out of your mouth at him like you’re catching flies is creepy. Wirth...rich manbun douche...I guess I’m just not cool because I don’t know him and have never seen him around *any* of my local circles here. Yeah, “old money”, my ass. To his credit, he seems like a decent dude who is just as weirded out by the manufactured drama as the rest of us. Why do all these bland white people look alike? Literally can’t tell most of them apart. Why would you show up to unpack and stock up a shop while wearing a crop top and your long hair down and flowing?? And why would you pile a bunch of twee Urban Outfitters crap(a globe..good gravy, the basic is strong with this one) atop a communal work desk??? Meanwhile, Jay Cutler apparently still hates the world and everyone else in it, including himself. He probably pretends to look at deer photos when he’s actually watching porn. A secret porn addiction might actually make him vaguely interesting. Kristen didn’t annoy me this episode. I’m sure that will change soon.

You guys who found Jay funny...did we even watch the same show? And were you laughing with him or at him??

The weirdest part of that story is that just hours later, Austen posted a pic on Instagram of he and and his girlfriend(the “crazy person” screaming in that video) cozying up and eating ice cream together. Just weird and awkward stuff all around...I literally have seen far more of Austen’s ass and undies than I ever need to again.

Boy, that video is a hoot! Loved how the camerawork made such a deliberate point to verrrrry carefully not show the entire front of the building(near the top), lest anyone see that it’s actually attached to a busy parking garage, gasp!! Just keep focusing on the courtyard, that’s right...there’s a courtyard. Such a nice leafy little courtyard with leaves all strewn in the koi pond. Don’t show the top bedroom where the kid and Tinsley slept. What elevator? Now toss in some random street and park scenes because it’s in a bustling, elegant area! With a courtyard. Yikes. It has the potential to be such a beautiful home if that soggy old lady decor was modernized and it was given a much needed update(that busy wallpaper and dark antique furniture/brown kitchen is so dreary)...but even then it likely wouldn’t be worth 30k a month; 12k-18k is a bit more realistic for current rent. Makes me sad how Sonja so desperately clings to that townhouse—-it really is the only thing she has left of that so-called “legacy.” It’s way too much house just for her and requires ongoing upkeep that she obviously can’t afford. If she weren’t so damned stupidly stubborn and got a tough and no-nonsense realtor who knew what he/she was doing(hello Beth, why aren’t you sending Fredrick her way already??), she could easily get that place sold and use the money made to move into something far sleeker and smaller on maybe the outskirts of the area or in another stylish part of town...I for one think a move like that would be so good for her. She could start new hobbies and meet new people, adopt a new vibe; but she really is relishing this slutty Mrs. Havisham type role she’s living there way too much.

I only watched this because it’s in my city, Nashville—-we have the dubious honor of having had at least 6 non-competitive reality shows ever filmed here and yet they’ve all been complete duds that no one ever watched and were swiftly canceled. I’ve had acquaintances featured in and star in all of them, and yet they’re *all* equally shitty shows with the same tired premises: boring people under 35 who either sleep around and/or drink excessively while desperately trying to “make it” in the glam world of Country Music USA, yee-haw!! Therefore I figured Kristen Cava-whocarey would likely present a typical basic bitch take on a far more diverse and interesting city than reality television remains unable to deliver, and she sure didn’t disappoint with this snoozer: she’s every bit as pointlessly smug as she was back when she was still semi-relevant! Only now she found an NFL player dumb enough to have multiple kids with her and buy them a big fugly nouveau riche palace across town like all the other NFL housewives. And she’s also hungrier. No seriously, she looks like she hasn’t eaten solid food in a year. Can someone please introduce her to the beauty of Nashville hot chicken already?? Jay Cutler has the personality of a potato chip, btw. A stale, bitter potato chip. He probably realizes she has his balls tied up to her for good with those 3 lil kids and probably hates his life as much as she hates him. Although I wouldn’t want to be around that listless drip of a dude either; he makes Kroy Bierman seem like The Most Interesting Man Alive. I could barely tell the two brunette basics “working” for her apart. One had more obnoxious eyebrows...the angry redhead was very proud to show off her tits in every scene and be deliberately confrontational. I guess she worshipped Kristen as a preteen, dreaming of being on her very own “The Hills”-style show and not eventually settling for slogging in this bile. I’ll be slightly saddened if we somehow find out she’s actually an LC fan. Oh, and of course one of them has a Luke Bryant-looking songwriter boyfriend! He sings her generic guitar songs on the sofa and in bars and at the studio! He has big time connections with important record dudes who wear big hats so he’s going places! How convenient and not contrived at all! Holding my breath until he and the whole Cava-whocarey crowd all “get crazy” and go honkeytonking downtown like every other bachelorette party/reality show cast in town. I'm totally hate-watching this shit, of course. There’s no other reason to do so unless we get a chance appearance by Ceiling Eyes(Audriana) at the opening of Kristen’s shop her husband bought her. And now I miss Justin-Bobby.

This is true too, @mythoughtis!! I used to work in home senior care when I was younger, and it was downright cruel in my eyes to see how many elder parents were left alone and *never* had visitors. My visits were often the highlight of their week. Half of them had kids and grandkids living clear across the country. I eventually had to leave the industry because it broke my heart so much and was wearing me out—-such loneliness and isolation for many of these poor devoted elderly parents...from that point forward, whenever anyone used the tired “but who will take care of you when you’re old” argument on me for being ChildFree, I’d immediately respond with my own proof that this magical elder care ideal is nothing but a fairy tale: having children is no guarantee that they’ll be there for you when you need them. Speaking of which, the GG’s themselves were all parents of 2-4 children/multiple grandchildren and they barely visited each other as well. That show was beyond ahead of its time if only because these older women all chose to live so independently like that!

I don’t think Carole is the “fun” friend a’la wild and crazy Ramonja with their crazy drunken antics—-I think in this case, the other poster meant Carole was “fun” in that she was always pretty easygoing, willing to try anything and stay cool about it, and could talk about anything with all the gals without even worrying about the consequences. She would flirt it up with various guys, was down for everything from donning slutty pirate outfits and downing excessive shots to bear costumes and other practical jokes, and she lovingly put up with Ramona in her crazier moments. She didn’t have any real beef with anyone until Aviva was so Hellbent on discrediting her((even with Lu she was semi-playful and lighter with her annoyance)), and once Beth sunk her talons into Carole, we gradually saw more of a snarkier, mean and sulky side of Carole emerge. I think the onset of aging, clinging to a younger chef and falling under Beth’s own sarcastic spell was when ‘Cool Carole’ went from being the “fun” lighthearted downtown gal of past seasons to the more bitter broad we’ve seen in the recent several seasons. The fried blonde bob and weirder fashion “moments” alongside more cosmetic treatments haven’t helped her cause.

That is so cool!! I wasn’t aware of this service actually existing either, but that truly gives me hope about life’s possibilities with age, just like “Golden Girls” did as a whole. All the characters on this show were active in every way, made a point to work and give back to the community, and had interesting and fulfilling lives/relationships in their golden years—-even watching this as a kid, it made getting older seem so much fun and much less scary or sad. As a Childfree woman myself, I’ve accepted the fact that I’ll likely one day be a widow and on my own. My friends in similar situations often joke that we need to just do the GG thing when the time is right, but it’s very true: as the baby boomers die off, generations X/Y are less community-based and will likely have no family left by the time their golden years approach. A GG-style living situation would be ideal for most of us by then, especially since retirement homes and communities are so insanely expensive.

Awwww, @AgentRXS, I’m so sorry you’re having to with petty passive-aggressiveness courtesy of such an asshole neighbor. Some people really need to learn how to live peacefully around other humans or otherwise just go do the rest of the community a favor and go live alone in a house somewhere like the creepy inner-hermits they truly are. Good for you going over your lazy landlady’s head and demanding your rights! No one should feel uncomfortable and terrorized in their own home—-much luck to you going forward. I feel your pain a bit since I’ve lived the past ten years in my loft building—-it *still* astounds me how rude and oblivious some people can be about living in a shared building, especially a creaky/echoey older historic building like this one! These rules should be posted in every single shared building out there: Don't slam your doors. Learn to walk softly and not stomp like elephants. Don’t wear your loudest shoes around inside when you don’t have to. If you keep strange earlier/later hours, make a point to be quieter than usual during those hours: running your vacuum/blender during these hours is unacceptable. Don’t smoke/cook weird shit in your place that’ll stink up an entire floor for a week. Don’t smoke on your terrace/patio exactly when you damned well know your non-smoking neighbors will also be out on their terrace/patios having to smell it too. Smoking is gross and so are you. Pick up/clean up your shit from the hallways when you make a mess! Learn to use an inside voice—-if I can hear your conversations/yelling from inside my own walls, you need to shut your loud ass up and quit straining your voice so goddamned much. If you scream when you have sex, have some class and scream into a pillow or something; trust me, most of us don’t wanna hear anyone’s porn star fantasies from down the hallway. Don’t blare your music: invest in some good headphones if you’re hellbent on regularly torturing your own eardrums. Learn how to keep your yappy dogs from yapping at all hours—-maybe research that shit before you move into a condo community with a yappy dog. And I don’t care whether you’re age 8 or 88: please don’t jump around, bounce balls and regularly spill stuff on your uncarpeted floors. —Sincerely, Someone Who Actually Knows How to Be a Thoughtful and Considerate Neighbor

Oh one of the brilliant posters here dubbed her “Amazing Arianna” one season due to the hilarious similarities between her and the “Amazing Amy” character from the Gone Girl book/movie. Although at least Arianna doesn’t appear to have sociopathic tendencies a’la plotting to have been killed by her partner just as a weird form of revenge for cheating. That seems more like some Scheana type behavior. Go figure that they’re both so chummy.

And that big brown coffee table is absolutely hideous. Doesn’t even match anything else in the living room. I’ve seen better looking living room set up’s at Rooms To Go.

The first dude I thought of, so bingo!

I’m not convinced this blind item isn’t about one of the “Vanderpump Rules” guys; that show is way more relevant and well-rated than SC and features far more cokeheads, after all.

I saw bits of Ashley here and there among the crowd during that episode and was already so curious about how she’d come across later on SC since I’d been seeing her all over Thomas’s Instagram by then—-I mostly remember how goddamned annoying Landon truly was when she completely hijacked an important discussion/moment Shep was having with one of the ladies(Bella, I believe?) by loudly cackling “I BROUGHT CAAAAAKKKKEEEE!!!!” while only bringing one piece for herself and one for Shep before plopping down right alongside the two of them like a sixth toe. Because she’s so thoughtful and socially aware like that. And I say this as someone who wasn’t even all that initially bothered by Landon. I watched a few minutes of this godforsaken show again while showering up today. It pretty much cements my initial annoyance with Peyton for being such an uptight, needy and basic twat. I didn’t care for the oldest gal just because she was so naggy and was so into “negging” Shep((I think she and Peyton both fully bought into the “Gone Girl”-approved ‘Cool Girl’ schtick)). And his fave chick Bella annoyed me just because she had the most obnoxiously grating case of vocal fry I’ve heard short of VR’s Scheana. So yeah, I pretty much hated all these hosebeasts featured on this show and am still convinced Shep dodged a full batch of bullets and Stage 5 Clingers.

Congrats on your sobriety and kadooze to you on learning to maintain a level head thanks to weed! Honestly, I don’t even smoke it myself but I completely support its full legalization in every state—-the overall health/emotional benefits of weed far outweigh its small downsides. Having just visited Denver, I was very impressed with all the well-run, organized dispensaries and the overall laidback attitudes of its locals. Leave it to the major pharmaceutical companies to be greedily fighting against cannabis due to its many healing benefits. And you’re so right—-had Lu been on a nice weed high, attacking an officer would’ve been the last thing she would’ve done. Look how chill resident RH potsmoker Carole is! She needs to teach Lu how to enjoy a few spliffs.

She looks adorable and seems insanely happy in every snapshot from Venice—-and following their super glam Europe vacay on Instagram is truly warming my cold, black heart. Doggonit, I really hope these two can make it. By all outward appearances, they seem really good for each other.

That’s true; say what you will about Sonja and her drinking habits, but she’s never been shitfaced at any of their brunches or dinners. She saves her drunken antics for random benders and late night outings. Whereas Slurinda pretty much gets naked wasted during group most meals and parties. I think she gradually got worse about the random drunk dining routine as she grew more comfortable around the cameras. She’s obviously bought into her hype and knows people are digging her drunk dining outbursts. Sadly though, she’s just revealing that she’s obviously a big time day-drinker who uses her afternoon nap time as a time-out until happy hour.