SnarkEnthusiast

It was very shitty of her to say, but unfortunately rings true to me in terms of inter-community biases. Plenty of LGBT folks are more than happy to throw the other letters under the bus when mainstream legitimacy is on the line. It's the "pick me" mentality. Assimilation is the holy grail and Elektra is living vicariously through Angel. It makes sense that someone as power and status-obsessed as Elektra would salivate over the opportunity to have Angel's marriage legally recognized because it's a formal inauguration into cis, heterosexual society. She knew gay men couldn't have that and it made her feel superior in that moment, regardless of her friendships.

I was annoyed that DJ became a symbol for Lori's bullshit "grace" resolution instead of a testament to Erin's love and devotion. He had lived with DJ's parents. There was no grounds for custody, they just had to hand him over to the lady who got away with obstructing his mom's murder? I was also disappointed with Carrie's non-resolution. I felt like having her relapse off-screen and just shrug and hand Mare custody validated Mare's (awful) behavior and sent the message that those struggling with addiction can't recover. (and also, subliminally, that we were supposed to anticipate or by relieved by her relapsing because she's portrayed as a "bad" addict). I thought she would move in with them. And fuck this show for using the post-Zabel kiss music over Mare's unearned, beige reunion with Guy Pearce, lol.

Papi's speech to the groomsmen brought tears to my eyes. He's just such a pure, loving, wholeheartedly accepting person. Easily one of my. favorite characters of all time. He's truly a love letter to a world without toxic masculinity. And Angel Curiel is the king of conveying those softer, emotional moments. He always looks at Indya like the world revolves around her. His reaction to her vows was so beautiful. I've never seen anyone radiate with love while crying and it encapsulates his character so well. I'll miss him the most. I hope Angel Curiel plays every romantic lead ever after this show, because no one holds a candle to his charm. My one complaint was not enjoying I Swear because 1) there's no way I buy bleeding heart Romeo Papi would totally blank on his vows of all things, and on the heels of an off-the-cuff monologue pouring his soul out to the groomsmen no less! It was just a way to shoehorn a musical number into the wedding. Which leads me to 2) it totally broke my immersion! This show loves a fantasy sequence, I know, but it didn't feel real, especially when the entire church joined in. I wouldn't have minded nearly as much if it hadn't replaced his actual vows, so when Blanca lampshaded that to Christopher I felt vindicated, lol. Agreed with @Crashcourse that it went a bit too long. Candy's farewell number felt justified, but I was disappointed the song monopolized 80% of the wedding and imo detracted from the natural emotion of the moment. It was particularly gimmicky given Angel Curiel and Indya's effortless chemistry, even if Angel C singing was, of course, endearing as hell. Angelica Ross looked incredible in her scene. It was by far my favorite look she's ever worn. The purple blazer, the earrings, the wig - everything was immaculate. It definitely made me forget how ridiculously overused Ghost!Candy has become. On that note, the fact that Papi and Angel had parallel his & her ghost hallucinations before their wedding is very unintentionally hilarious. (Were Cubby and Papi even close or did he just need a ghost to visit him? I'm assuming this is another Angel/Candy scenario where I've forgotten they interacted.) This season really highlighted how underrated and underused Ricky is as a character. Dyllón Burnside brings such a warm energy into his scenes and has wonderful chemistry with every scene partner. His friendship with Papi is truly the most wholesome gift this final stretch of episodes could've given us. I loved when Papi reached for his hand during I Swear. A tiny moment that speaks volumes about their dynamic and makes the characters feel real amidst the absurdity. Beautiful, textured character work from both Angel C and Dyllón. Dyllón is also something special and I hope his star continues to rise. Soap and shark jumping aside, I'm gonna fucking miss this show.

This series has been paint by numbers for several years now, but Geoff always reels me back in. Sure the break up plot was always going to be pointless, but at least they tried to acknowledge that Geoff exists to be Erica’s butler and tried to even the dynamic a bit before inevitably revealing that he of course gets the most joy out of living for her. Sam Lerner just does earnest and sincere so well. I love guys who play soft love interests and eat it up every time. Admittedly I have a small crush, haha. Their reunion kiss was a mirror of their first, but it was startling after a year of Covid restrictions. That was a pretty intense make out out of nowhere considering they’ve been seemingly going out of their way to avoid kissing scenes all season. I guess you can’t really celebrate reuniting with the love of your life with a pandemic-approved peck. Usually I hate shows ending, but I was actually disheartened to hear about the renewal, mostly because I am dreading them finally being forced to acknowledge George Segal’s death in the show, but also because Erica getting engaged was a clear ending point. Also, I think they are going to force Adam to wait to graduate high school until the series finale, but he just went to senior prom, which is about 4 to 6 weeks until graduation. So assuming next season will be the last, is it all going to take place over a month? Lol. Honestly it might be more interesting to watch him make movies in college. Sean will be 25 playing a high school senior at this rate. Johnny Atkins and Matt Bradley are consistently great.

Sam announced to the group that he had no long term interest in Ines after he was turned off by her envisioning a future with him. I think that was the only way he felt like he could get the message across because she presented their affair to the group as a love connection (like Jess). This episode really made me hurt for Michael. That video took a ton of effort and communication with her family/friends and really shows not only how invested he is in Martha, but how much time he's taken to get to know everyone she cares about. He's such a genuinely sweet and caring man. Then he gives her clearly expensive earrings over a fancy dinner and she ruins it with an ultra pessimistic monologue about how she doesn't think distance can work so they'll probably break up anyway. I'm with Michael - if distance is such a dealbreaker, why sign up for a show that could match you with anyone around the country? I think she likes him just fine, but I think she's already signaled she has one foot out the door and will quickly grow bored outside the bubble. He's all in, but to her he's just a fling. Speaking of pessimism, Ning is a headache and all over the place. One minute she's writing leave and sobbing about not being meant for him, then she's saying she's hoping for romance, then she refuses to commit to anything beyond the experiment, then she spends the entire night trying to seduce Mark. I don't blame his confusion. From his point of view, she won't even reassure him that she'll give them a chance beyond the experiment and then pivots immediately back to insisting they have sex, on the same night? I never want to hear anyone say they "have the feels" again. It's strange that Ning uses such a juvenile phrase to describe her relationship development over and over again - to the point where the entire group has adopted it as serious vernacular. Mark even said "she's sabotaging this relationship because she has the feels for me..." on the couch. It's so embarrassing and makes everyone sound like they're in high school. Nothing says "I'm committed to this marriage" like "I describe my relationship in terms that a tween would use."

It's especially ironic that they've telegraphed her getting a promotion after an episode about getting cancelled and her admitting to wanting to fuck a subordinate (after the COVID pause, I had forgotten Scott existed). But love will triumph, apparently! The end of this episode basically established Jane/Scott as endgame. I get that Scott just happened to be the love interest du jour when the show was cancelled, but it's really strange to watch the writers catapult them to Meant to Be territory when they've only been horny for each other for max four weeks in show time. These post-COVID cancellation seasons are weird and rushed and I don't like them. Despite Jane being a Mary Sue, I think (hope) even the writers understand there's no feasible way to have Jane end the series with Jacqueline's job - maybe as some kind of assistant junior editor, but not EIC. Especially if she bites the sexy forbidden fruit with Scott. I'm sure I'll be quoting this post in a few weeks to mock how wrong I was. The Ava debacle was the main reason I was shocked there wasn't a time jump (besides compensating for the COVID break and trying to move plots forward to better position everyone to wrap up the series). After all the blowback last season and Aisha's interview criticizing the story and the fact that they had already inserted that text exchange to change the finale after viewer outrage, you'd think they'd want to distance themselves from the Ava plot as much as possible. Especially since Aisha herself complained that the plot exemplified the contemporary lack of diversity in the writers' room. But nope, not only is Ava featured in the episode, she gets an entire subplot where Kat is repeatedly forced to justify ghosting her. Because that's clearly what Kat fans were clamoring for. It felt like the writers were using Ava and Kat as respective mouthpieces for them and the viewers. Kat's uncharacteristic ambivalence and inability to express her feelings about the situation (until the end) seemed to be a lukewarm defense of the original decision to pursue Kat/Ava romantically. But yeah, it was really awkward. The actresses looked uncomfortable. The dialogue was stilted. The writers seemed oblivious - hopefully they've finally gotten Black writers back in the room. And that's why you shouldn't try to turn the concept of a steamy hate fuck into an attempted genuine romance between a Black woman and bootleg Megan McCain, especially in our current political climate. I have the most faith that Sutton will get the strongest/most realistic resolution, but divorce is a hell of a lot to bite off in the final six episodes. I also don't see them allowing Sutton to end the series single and I'm concerned Richard will return because of that. The writers have really painted themselves into a corner here, because there's no way they could realistically reconcile. Maybe that's why they chose to have Billy continue to reach out, which struck me as a bizarre decision because it's not like that can go anywhere either. He's a shitty husband who let Sutton believe he was single to sleep with her (she didn't know before they had sex, right?). So it will be interesting to see where they go with her. If she has to end with a love interest, I hope it's Alex! I always loved them together, although his current girlfriend is admittedly cooler than Sutton and this whole tweet feud cancellation vendetta subplot is making him seem petty and immature.

Hi all! I haven’t watched this show since they killed off Melendez. I’m only back because I saw Morgan and Park were banging. Yes, I am shallow and my attraction to Will Yun Lee is the only thing keeping me here. That and I am an absolute sucker for “emotionally unavailable character slowly develops feelings for soft, vulnerable love interest” storylines. Park is such a good guy and I’m glad that he didn’t allow her to bully him into being ashamed of being emotionally available or buying into her bullshit toxic masculinity pitch. Watching him bring out a softness and her is really nice, although she’s of course characteristically still a prickly asshole. I’m guessing she will finally drop that routine in the finale next week, at least long enough to convince Park to be with her. I am relieved to see they’ve finally dropped the ableism and Manic Pixie Dream Girl charade with Shaun and Lea. It’s nice to see them being a normal couple, even if they’re a little boring. I’m still not sure if killing off Melendez just to designate Shaun as the leading man apparent was necessary, but moving on. With this show, now that Lea has successfully performed impromptu ankle surgery, i’m sure she will be the head nurse by next season premiere. Or lead cardiac surgeon. I don’t know why Glassman’s marriage has warranted an ongoing subplot. Watching poor Claire (continue to) play misery porn roulette is a real downer.

I’m glad I’m not the only one who thought that roller rink scene was unbelievably gay. Normally I loathe queerbaiting, but this is possibly the only instance where the fake out is preferable, lol. The last thing Kate needs is to feel pressure to please someone else she loves. I agree that Harley is a very weak actress even for Freeform (though in her defense, I thought I spotted an obvious saline tear streak on Olivia Holt’s face when she was holding the door, so even the heavyweights aren’t perfect!). Pairing her with Kate/Olivia actually kind of covers up her flaws to a certain extent - it’s easier/move natural to play giddy teen besties than it is to convey nuanced, dramatic emotions. But yeah, most of Mallory’s scenes are essentially Harley talking instead of acting, if that makes sense. Boo Derek! I was disappointed we got zero build up to his hookup with Ash. It just seems like the afterglow scene came out of nowhere to give him a pretext to find the chat log. Overall, I was glad to see Ash again and I wish she had been incorporated into the show earlier. Not looking forward to the discovery ruining Kate’s trust. Froy Gutierrez played a pretty believable drunk. He really swings for the fences in channeling “asshole high school boyfriend deeply threatened by his girlfriend’s independence and obviously superior potential.” I think I have a crush on Kate’s dad. He’s hands-down the best character of the series. “Don’t ever imply that I’m not her father again” was badass and also hot as hell. Eat shit, Joy!

That's probably one of Pose's biggest failures - its glorification of cis beauty standards and its refusal to self-critique its own casting process. Internalizing and prioritizing acceptance and appeal to people in the majority (cis folks, in this case) affects how you perceive those in your own community. You end up with a cast full of models/actresses who not only pass, but fully exemplify hyper femininity. Even the smallest roles are played by runway models (see: Laith Ashley and Leyna Bloom, who each barely spoke but were cast as background eye candy). I get that it's TV and TV demands pretty, but it's started to feel disingenuous when they've repeatedly insisted on clocking plots. There's a real missed opportunity to acknowledge the privilege of these characters by pretending they face the same public scrutiny as trans folks who actually don't pass. It displays a very meta lack of self-awareness, because though the initial storylines themselves strove for authenticity, the casting reaffirms the superiority of a very narrow, privileged trans experience (namely, that you can only be happy/successful or make it in The Industry through being conventionally attractive by cis standards).

Ok... I...well. I have to applaud the show for being totally unafraid to jump the shark and fully galloping into fan fiction. I get what the writers are trying to do. I know that trans women of color often face unending misery and especially in the 80s/90s. I understand the impulse to want to give the characters an oasis of happiness despite realism. But what’s being lost in that is the tactility of the characters. We get scene after scene of blatant fan service (what even was that weird montage of the four of them posing in the bridal gowns? Who were they looking at? They were all just staring off into space looking in four different directions, silently voguing? I guess the fourth wall goes out the window if costume porn is involved). I’m not saying that everyone has to suffer to be realistic, but none of the cast feels like real people anymore. I can maybe buy Electra’s arc in the sense of her building a phone sex empire, but having a butler and renting out a spa and robbing a bridal store and hosting a whole banquet for basically half the ballroom scene? She’s not a Bond mistress. And I’m supposed to believe Blanca just swans around and basks in Elektra’s wealth? Maybe Angel and Lulu, but Blanca is too humble. I feel like I’m rambling on this point but it’s just underwhelming in its attempt to deliver wish fulfillment in the laziest way possible. What made the show compelling was love, not fantasy. Any singular plot of any character this season would be believable, but taken together just almost mocks the show's origins. It’s just an overstuffed mess of fan service. There’s happy endings and then there’s...whatever this is. I don’t like it because it conflates a satisfying conclusion and character happiness with ridiculous wealth and success. It’s still not a great message if you can only be happy if you somehow magically achieve the unattainable. Not in this season! Lol. The tone is all over the place even within this episode - Papi is sobbing over his long lost son while Angel & co. sit in the spa and get lap dances after a luxurious banquet. Next week we’ll go back to Pray dying and then the finale will be Electra buying a private island for Blanca or something. Trying to balance out one extreme with the other is just making the entire season look ridiculous and feels very cheap. The tone is dictated by the storyline of the week instead of following any narrative flow that would make it feel earned or real. But you captured what I was trying to say in my first paragraph perfectly. Re: are so many 1990s cis people really able to detect trans women on the spot, the bridal shop owner's repulsion was an excuse to have Elektra read him, an homage to when she chewed out the housewife in the restaurant last season, which became one of the most viral moments of the show. Angel has been an awful girlfriend lately. I felt terrible for Papi (and as much as I want to eye roll the soapy child twist, I remind myself it happened to Karamo irl!). I wish shows would realize that giving us soft, emotionally available male characters doesn’t equate to making them live-in butlers who acquiesce to their partner’s every whim. Papi deserves the same unconditional support he gives. You shouldn’t have to beg your partner to “let” you raise your child. Angel Curiel really acted his ass off this episode. I think Papi picked a bad time to tell her about his kid at 4 AM when she was coming home drunk from the strip club and she probably just needs some time to sleep it off and process it. But of course he’s a secret dad - he and Angel are the poster children for aspirational heteronormative assimilation, so obviously they need an instant kid. I guess the aunt is going to decide she doesn’t feel like raising her nephew after all because Angel is just so perfect. But I digress.

As others have pointed out, I know that the show isn’t Mare and Colin of Easttown, but I was still surprised how quickly they steamrolled over Zabel’s death. They don’t have much time, I get that, but I was disappointed that they just had one quick scene with his mom and then immediately threw Mare back with Guy Pearce, although her rejection felt pretty final. I guess we were supposed to infer how much she cared about Colin because she lied to his mom and said he saved her life, when he literally just stood there like a sitting duck and dropped dead lol. But I guess it was nice albeit patronizing of her to try to comfort his mom with a heroic portrait of his final moments. I think Mare is going to end the series alone and she always would have because that’s consistent with her character. I just wish Colin hadn’t died. I have an incredibly lustful bias towards Evan Peters now, sure, but this episode felt empty without him, in spite of the dizzying chaos. Between the girl being attacked, the suicide flashback, Siobhan having a breakdown and worst of all, the fake out that the grandson would drown (not to mention Mare hurdling towards a cabin in the woods to face down a confirmed murderer ALONE...Zabel really did die in vain because he taught you nothing), this show really needs to give my adrenal gland a break. I’m still baffled by Siobhan getting basically the main B-plot of the series and I hope there’s a payoff. I guess the drama of this show has spoiled me, because if it turns out to be your run-of-the-mill storyline of coping with grief or needing to be emotionally available to your children I will be annoyed, lol. The obsessive text train would have made me think that she had some greater involvement with Erin, possibly. But now that the kidnappings are solved and Billy is revealed as both Erin’s murderer and the father of her child, what else is left? Why the intense focus on her? For that reason, the Dylan subplot also no longer makes sense. Unless Billy turns out to be a red herring, but I don’t understand why they would go that route after this episode. Mare’s friend’s husband sure is clueless. “Hey bro, I know you just confessed to murdering and probably impregnating a teen in our own family, but fuck it, let’s go to a remote cabin for one last hurrah before your life sentence!” I’m guessing her grandson‘s mom will ask to move in with them for help and that will solve the custody issue.

No, that's pure fantasy. Dan has brass balls to think the experts would actually let them play house the next two weeks because they're "following their hearts" after weeks of cheating on their partners and causing group chaos. There's no way the experts would blow up the group dynamic at the very end and reward Jess/Dan's toxic behavior. I love Tam! She's been the most mature person in the cast. Her level-headedness and conflict resolution skills are impressive. She's treated Jess with such respect even though she never deserved it. She's the only person who doesn't get swept up in emotions and it's super attractive in the sea of whispers and middle school drama among the women. Speaking of which, I can't believe Ning took the bait and believed Jess' bullshit rumor about Mark wanting to go on a country-wide fuckathon. The timing was terrible, as listening to Mark's excitement during the boys' night (which was the epitome of wholesome!!!) about maybe consummating the marriage was adorable. I was glad Mick immediately vouched for his attraction to her and shook off the rumor. Between that and her overreaction to the best man's skepticism, I think she's still subconsciously looking for any excuse to run because she's just not attracted to Mark. I feel bad for him, he looked worn down even before the rumor conflict. It has to be exhausting waiting around for someone who will maybe decide to give you a breadcrumb in 3-5 weeks if you're on your best behavior and they decide not to find you repulsive. Romantic! Mike was awful this week. Yikes. Heidi is no prize, but he really showed his ass and got in the gutter with Jess for no reason. I think Heidi is done. Cam is such a pure human being!! He's my favorite. I agree that I don't trust Martha with gentle Michael, who I also love. Michael's respectful response defending his wife while appreciating Cam's concern was very mature. The men have such a loving, supportive group dynamic and it makes me sad the women always backslide into petty catfights.

Although that makes sense, he should've shared that memo with Clara earlier before she loudly complained about "getting him off every night" unreciprocated. Having a horny son might be embarrassing, but having him revealed as a selfish lover is worse! I hope they are happy irl and Ryan's awkwardness can be chalked up to wanting privacy. There were many times where it felt like she was muting her feelings/personality for his benefit, but they must be the real deal behind closed doors. For her sake I hope so, because his non-reactions and evasive neutral answers to everything would slowly unhinge me if that were his actual 24/7 persona. Even though we could all guess Haley was turned off after the sex, I thought Haley snickering and basically publicly confirming Jake as terrible in bed was cruel. This isn't high school after prom. Just say you didn't feel sexual chemistry or realized you weren't sexually compatible, which then imploded the relationship. Kudos to Clara and Briana for being the adults in the room and saying that they were just different (allegedly) nice people. Although if Jake really did block her on every platform, maybe they deserved each other. Dude, you're pushing 40! Both of them just need to be mature instead of this embarrassing teen drama.

So we’re supposed to believe Ronald gave up Kelli to put him at the pick up point where the syndicate could scoop him up right? How did he know the timing would work out? Is this a James Bond movie now? He also had two different people six inches away emptying their clips trying to shoot him point blank in the head. Is he sex pervert Magneto now? It made me laugh/cringe that Scarlett bit his hand sexily while he was pretending to hold her hostage. Can y'all ever give your pain kink a rest? They're even unspeakably horny while cornered by the cops. Complain all you want about Ronald being elevated to some untouchable super villain, but I’m just as disgruntled by Jenny’s immortality. She survives getting hit with a semi truck and now two episodes later will obviously survive a direct shot to the chest? Which I noticed had magically moved down to her side by the next shot (good catch @saber5055), probably to make her survival more plausible. One minute she’s bleeding out on the asphalt and the next minute she is only slightly woozy and talking to Cassie as she gets loaded into the ambulance? Having just had my heart ripped out by the latest episode of Mare of Easttown, Jenny’s obvious impending miraculous recovery from a clearly mortal wound grates on me. Also, I joined a few episodes late and had no idea Jenny even had a kid, so seeing her at home making grandiose declarations of improving her future parenting (another point in the obviously going to die column, I assumed after she had gotten shot) to not just a kid, but a lanky 15-year-old, was disconcerting. How old is she supposed to be? And why bother even giving her and Cassie kids if we never see them? The writers are obviously bored by their home life, so they should’ve just left it at dead partners if they are never going to bother with family scenes. Their kids have been in like two episodes maximum. More tepid flirting between Cassie and Older Cop! Their forced romantic banter is painful. I want her to have a love interest, but not him. He feels very paternal towards her in an incredibly awkward way. Very “45 year old trying to pick up 23 year old in a bar.” Since everyone wants Ronald, Cheyenne, and Jeri gone, I'm sure next season will feature Jeri and Cheyenne going undercover to Canada to find Ronald, only to be repelled by his invisible force field!

This episode seemed to clarify that Greg started dating Angela after Cindy left - no infidelity after all. As for why she'd be into Greg, a baffling number of women can't resist a fixer upper. I think tragedy porn appeals to a lot of people's savior complexes, particularly women, who are often socialized to pity and nurture men through trauma. Look at all the men on Dateline/any ID show who find second wives/girlfriends after spinning a sad tale about the first wife's "accident" or disappearance. Most often, their current partners will even double down on defending them because "that's not the man they know!" and they were always nice to them, so therefore could never be capable of violence. Men get the benefit of the doubt long after they deserve it even if it defies facts and logic. In Angela's case, I think she believes that if she can just support (coddle) Greg enough and run interference between him and Jeanette, she can restore him to the man he used to be, or at least the man she was initially attracted to before he became a mopey, self-pitying jackass. I just don't like Greg as a character. Kate's mom is also a jerk, but her motivations are at least compelling. Greg is just a dick who feels sorry for himself and it's getting repetitive. Jeanette's witness intimidation made me roll my eyes. Wouldn't her accusation of paternity fraud also be hearsay? I guess a paternity test isn't/wasn't required for child support payments (...okay?), so would the claim of a vengeful teen have any legal weight in terms of mandating one? Moving on from applying logic there, as it's an obvious fanfic moment. Jeanette's transformation (devolution) mirrors that of Dory in Search Party - insecure girl (woman) is bored with her own life, becomes addicted to the adrenaline rush of crime/investigation, and transforms into an unrecognizable narcissist before crashing back to earth, down to the dystopian haircuts post-ego reckoning, lol. This show is basically a YA version of Search Party without the satire. It was a rare win for Cindy and I appreciate that the writers gave her enough agency to leave the marriage and pursue her dreams, rather than the cliche "disillusioned alcoholic mom" decline hinted at in earlier scenes. Other thoughts: I don't buy Jaime and Jeanette starting to bond in "mall jail." Kate is nice enough to overlook social status, but it's a stretch to me that Jaime would extend similar kindness to 1993 Jeanette. He seems very self and image obsessed. I have a hard time believing that the dude who went on to punch her and gaslight Kate about her foggy trauma memory would be super warm and friendly towards Geek Jeanette. The writers are smart to highlight Jeanette's friendship with Vince and loving acceptance of his sexuality, which is thus far her sole redeeming quality. Overall, I'm not enjoying Jeanette-centric episodes (which are also dragging compared to Kate's imo) and am always impatient to return to Kate's POV.

Well, it’s been 12 hours since I’ve watched and I’m still devastated. I should’ve known as soon as they kissed he was toast but I never saw it coming. Also, I think that was the only time we’ve seen Mare smile outside of mocking her mom for the affair, which was the only light part of the episode. I guess they were telegraphing his apparent secret ineptitude when he confessed to her about not solving the case - it was a nice detail to have them confide in each other if it hadn’t been foreshadowing something so terrible - because they needed to give him a pretext for hesitating to draw his gun because now he’s revealed as Not A Good Detective Actually. And even if you hand wave not requesting backup (so that Zabel could die), there’s no way you would just keep casually chatting to a guy you knew could be actively holding teenagers hostage in his house, let alone without being hyperaware of needing to draw your weapon at any second. But the suspect was white, so maybe it does track. I appreciate the depth they gave Colin in terms of not being a shiny prodigy whiz kid, but I also feel like that last 20 minutes was a very sloppy and half assed attempt to make his death seem plausible within the narrative. More grief porn for Mare! Death for shock value has become a cliche within itself. Everyone on this show is so fucking sad and depressed all the time, we just needed one light. Still bitter we got to see Mare have a meaningless fuck with Guy Pearce, but never hot, emotionally charged sex with Colin. She never smiled like that when the author kissed her, that’s for sure. I'm also disgruntled Mare now squandered their only date being...well, Mare. I thought she was frankly a bit of an asshole tuning out his earnest attempts at non-work smalltalk and particularly for allowing him to, however temporarily, believe she was exploiting his feelings to monitor the case. At least her reaction to the kiss implied that she was actually starting to reciprocate his feelings. I noticed that too! Evan Peters added so many delightful little touches to his performance. Apparently Colin dropping the food during their date was also Evan's improv. I read that he’s headed back to a Ryan Murphy property after this, which I was disappointed to hear, because I’m tired of him playing creepy serial killers (echoing @TwoBitUsherette). Hopefully the positive buzz he’s gotten from this will convince him to consider more softer romantic lead roles. He was really the unexpected stand out of this series and I will miss him bitterly, especially because there were only two more episodes and it’s not like there would be a second season, so cutting his arc short feels especially cruel. In conclusion:

I was just coming here to comment that! It's also a little bit of extra spit in the eye to have her initially choose Simon... why even bother supposedly resolving the love triangle if you were going to spend the entire next season immediately establishing not only that she still has romantic feelings for Max, but realizing that her feelings for Simon were actually platonic all along, apparently? And the entire course of Zoey and Simon's actual relationship involved him having to watch the obvious tension and codependency between Zoey and Max. Essentially he was forced to realize Zoey had zero romantic interest in him in real time and would obviously end up with Max, but had to keep playing along with the foursome friendship charade to be a good boyfriend, which he was, Zoey just didn’t give a shit. And then having him intuit that she wasn’t invested emotionally so that it could be his decision to gracefully step aside to take blame away from Zoey. And it’s not only totally amicable, Simon is singing cheerful songs about looking forward to the future days later because we can’t have any resentment or awkwardness make Zoey look bad or get in the way of Max/Zoey, realism be damned! It's really degrading to Simon. He doesn't have to be bitter, but at least give him real feelings. I interpreted that as yet another subliminal insult to Simon (and Zoey/Simon) by designating Max as inherently and magically special, thereby officially anointing him as the Chosen Love Interest and validating Zoey's decision not to tell Simon about her powers (keeping it an exclusive secret between her and Max). Max is so exceptional and his relationship with Zoey is so meant to be that the writers are apparently willing to throw out all of the established backstory around the powers and them being unique to Zoey (the point of the show) because white romance and I guess they couldn’t bear to emasculate Max by giving Zoey an ability he didn’t have, even if it’s magical powers. If the show gets cancelled, at least Mo/Perry are endgame and Tobin has a girlfriend!

Ok, there should be a 3 strikes rule at commitment ceremonies - if a partner writes leave 3 consecutive weeks, they're done, regardless of what the other party says or wants. It’s very disrespectful to the unhappy participant to totally steamroll their perspective or at worst, their emotional health just because they are saddled with someone with their own self-absorbed agenda. Why allow Mick to suffer? The experts know Jess’ claim of “rebuilding a respectful friendship“ is garbage because they’ve blatantly seen her shopping for other husbands. Speaking of which, I cannot believe that Nic didn’t take advantage of the opportunity to tell the group and Cyrell that Jess propositioned him. It would’ve really helped Mick. Unpopular opinion, but Cam and Jules kind of annoyed me this week. You know you’re becoming a little bit self-obsessed (not to mention totally solid as a couple) when you try to virtue signal and get attention from your family by lamenting that everyone else’s drama is just so taxing on YOU and your extended honeymoon!!! To the point of melodramatic weeping, really??? Other than being briefly and vaguely referenced for a comment, they weren’t even involved! I bet a lot of the other couples wish they were doing well enough in the experiment to have the emotional bandwidth to fall to pieces over something so trivial. It doesn’t matter but it rubbed me the wrong way and felt pretentious. I think being the darlings of this season has started to go to their heads a little bit. I’d like to formally apologize to Mike. I still think he’s kind of an ass and I wouldn’t date him, but Heidi is miserable. I can’t imagine enduring emotional abuse over towels and takeout.

I always get a kick out of actors pretending to be repulsed by their actual significant others. And that meet cute definitely explains Jeanette's initial animosity towards her. Greg was not smart blatantly hitting on her in front of Vince. That's also probably why Angela is going out of her way to be the cool stepmom figure now (other than Greg being an aloof, bitter sad sack), because she feels bad for accelerating the end of the marriage at the very least. Especially creepy given that Kate and Jeanette are the same age. He scolds and infantilizes Jeanette for rejecting Gideon (not your place, dude...projecting his younger self, I'm guessing) while luring Kate in with lavish praise about how mature she is and how she's supposedly indistinguishable from adults because he's attracted to her. Two episodes?! I feel like we've only gotten set up and teasers so far. Hopefully they find a way to wrap everything up. Will the mystery carry over to a hopeful next season? I don't get the sense that this will be a series of different stories every season a la AHS - the plot is so convoluted and that feels too sophisticated for Freeform - but if it were, I hope they would keep the same cast, as it would be fun to watch them play different roles. Seconded. If they are setting it up as some kind of miscommunication twist reveal where Jeanette's not actually in the wrong, why is she still such a creepy little weirdo and why am I supposed to empathize with her? For being dorky and unattractive at 15? Her dad become a jackass, but she's bitter and manipulative to everyone and just not a nice person. I appreciate that they're rightfully portraying it as grooming and predatory behavior despite him being young and attractive.

Please stop slandering my Colin! lol I need one genuinely pure, wholesome character in this depressing vortex of a show. And while I could maybe see the abductions dovetailing with his bitterness over the high school ex, I feel like he would be much more reluctant and grumpy about moving the investigation forward and helping Mare if he were the suspect. He'd want to stall and obfuscate leads. He could be the world's best actor or simply kissing her ass to deflect suspicion, but I don't see it. To me, he's basically a puppy with a schoolboy infatuation with a co-worker. Given the lingering shot on "Bennie's Tavern" and Colin mentioning that his buddy just opened a restaurant, my thought was that his friend abducted those girls (which would also explain how they're magically hidden from staff if only Friend knows that room, that hallway is off limits, etc.) and then Colin and Mare would discover them on their first date when one of them goes to the bathroom or something. Plus, the upcoming episode teaser implied that most of the teens we've seen played a role in Erin's murder, perhaps as some sort of murder among friends scenario or an accident that they now have to cover up. I think any adult men in Erin's life will turn out to be red herrings, at least with respect to her death itself. Based on the overt threats to Sara for her perceived wavering loyalty, I think those kids did it.

Pros of this episode: Zabel accidentally introducing Mare to his mom as "my Mare" secret vegetable ice cream hiding nooks "Am I not maimed enough for you?" casual potato chip based wellness checks Cons of this episode: everything else why does the universe hate Dawn so much? It leaves a bad taste in my mouth that 1) Mare actually planted the drugs on Carrie and 2) the narrative is trying to justify her planting the drugs on Carrie via making Carrie a shitty person, but that flashback was incredibly rough regardless. As much as I adore the concept of making a beer guzzling, no BS 45+ year old woman an object of desire for multiple men, I feel like the amount of time and sparse emotional intimacy she's giving them would not sustain that intense dueling infatuation in real life lol. But then again, I acknowledge that that could describe most leading men on television, so bring on Author Dude and Evan Peters pining and persisting despite obvious aloofness and a clear lack of emotional availability!

Looks like everyone will get a chance to suckle at the teat of Emmy bait! This episode really illustrated how much Dominique Jackson has grown as an actress, even if the whole "selfless suffering mother" spin on the flashbacks was a massive, glaring retcon. I'll allow it because the episode was incredibly wholesome, despite revolving around disposing of a body (again). Speaking of which...while the bacteria explanation makes a sewage treatment center seem like a logical dump site at first, they threw in the trunk too. Even if the corpse eventually dissolved, you're telling me the plant workers wouldn't notice a large (unweighted!!!) leather trunk floating in the water? And bougie practicing doctor Christopher is not only unbothered, but chipper about transporting a corpse for a stranger to prove his loyalty to a girlfriend of 3 months? He truly is peak Manic Pixie Dream Guy. LOVED the Ricky/Papi interaction. It was nice to see them both doing something beyond being a love interest, especially Ricky, who has basically been The Boyfriend for the show's entire run. His quips to Blanca were hilarious, as was the brotherly love between him and Papi. And yes, the actor is cute as hell, which is notable in such a pretty cast. Angel/Indya looked hot with a tomboy style/pixie cut. She was the most believably aged down in the flashbacks (Cubby too, but he had such a babyface already). The fairytale ball blowout was phenomenal. And hey, Candy got to be a character again instead of a group hallucination Sage Advice Ghost! Not looking forward to returning to Pray's pity party next week - he already got his showcase episode, and it was a retread to start with! When will it be Papi's turn? Overall, this episode gave me renewed hope for the season. Again, hats off to Dominique for rising to the occasion. If we have to write off Damon's throwaway character assassination, then I hope Elektra gets to ride off into the sunset as queen of her own phone sex empire (excellent, in-character career track!).

Highlight of the night was Mick's bug-eyed, blank stare as he calmly tried to take in Cyrell spilling (yelling) the beans in front of everyone, lol. Between that, scoffing at Jess' fake compliment barrage, and finally dressing up as a dinner party swan song, he has never been funnier. I'm glad Cyrell called out Jess and she seems to be a very loyal friend. For once her being confrontational came in handy. I'm disappointed at her immaturity in taking her ring off with Nic though. She's always calculated in trying to hurt him out of spite and it's super unhealthy. I know it doesn't matter because he should leave regardless, but he's always been devoted to her. It's unfair and characteristically self-absorbed of her to expect him to eagerly enter a lifelong macho pissing contest with her blowhard brother - or else he "must not really care!!" It's manipulative gaslighting to create conflict and get off on being in the middle. Tamara deserves so much better. I really respected her for attempting to have a rational, objective discussion with Jess instead of going off on her. Susie is definitely the one in the wrong, but Billy was...a masterclass in cringe. It almost made you forget how awful Susie is, which is nearly impossible. It was like watching a butthurt 15-year-old try to pretend his girlfriend dumping him was actually his idea. "And another thing...you're ugly anyway!" I've never seen anyone do the "walk back inside for one final zinger" thing outside of sitcoms. He needs to learn the value of quitting while you're ahead. I thought his tantrum with her friends was deeply embarrassing as well. Dude, they're not involved! Their opinions mean nothing! They can't make her like you! You asked to to talk to them alone! Even if they agreed with you, it doesn't fix anything. Billy came off sulky and petulant. It wasn't exactly a glowing advertisement for his future girlfriends. He should've just smiled and taken the high ground. I think he, like the sporty woman in the lesbian marriage last (next?) season, was all too happy to accept her personality when he thought a he had a shot with a woman he perceived to be out of his league physically, only to self-implode in pettiness when he realized he had no chance. Not a good look. The jury's still out on Ning and Mark - her sabotaging the first time they had sex with a random phone call suggests she's still fixated on retaining emotional control of the relationship, as Mike astutely pointed out - but I find their dynamic delightful. Her coaching him about his kissing technique being "too stabby" was hilarious, and it was encouraging to see Mark respond with laughter. He knows not to take her passive aggression personally now and you can see the evolution of their relationship, especially when compared to their disaster of a honeymoon pool kiss. He's been a really good sport about the entire experience. He might be the best catch of the husbands, personality-wise. It's just a matter of whether and when Ning decides their emotional intimacy can overcome her lack of physical attraction to him. I'm rooting for them, though! Watching Michael with Martha's uncles was adorable.

I'm surprised. The show has really been spinning its wheels lately. I can't wait for the Kleinsassers to be done. So many useless characters. I'm confused why this was renewed but Stumptown was axed, which was very similar in tone and imo vastly superior. Ronald and the Kleinsassers seem to be on their way out (thankfully), but Jeri is likely here to stay, as last episode implied that she might become a PI or pursue some sort of investigative career. I see her becoming a series regular and the only holdover from Ronald's arc after S1. Speaking of the actress, she randomly left a flirty Instagram comment on the Instagram of a mid-level YouTuber I've followed for years and also have a crush on. I clicked on her profile and realized who she was. Talk about worlds colliding! I know she's still very small-time, but it was funny to me/refreshing that someone who's "made it" in Hollywood still lusts over fairly obscure YouTubers. Now all I can think about when she's onscreen is how we like the same guy, lol. She has good taste!!

I have the opposite take. Couples Cam bores me to tears and I never thought It'd outlast quarantine. Not only will it apparently be ongoing, but it's also being offered as as a presumable financial carrot for future couples who stay together. How many day dates and prenatal appointments must we watch and why did Lifetime decide that this should be a recurring series? It's essentially a dozen people in their 30s vlogging from their couches. I actually enjoyed the countdown special more than the actual season. Woody, Amani, Miles and even Beth were hilarious because they brought snark and a little sarcasm without being mean. It made me wish that they'd bring back Couples Couch, but only with those three couples lol. Tbh I'd rather watch an hour of them poking fun at each episode than the actual 2 hour episode itself, which is always bloated and drags. Woody's exasperation at Jake/Haley having sex and Paige/Chris in general made me laugh out loud.