SnarkEnthusiast

We all knew that Jenny would survive, but having her emerge with basically a superficial forehead gash when the woman she was clinging to died instantly is ridiculous. You can't even give her a broken arm or something? For being the supposed Sopranos of Montana, the Kleinsassers sure are boring. Endless preening and hot air with no action. Stop with the coy lines and pretentious monologues about killing each other and do it! They give Rand a lot of shit for being the struggling outcast weirdo of the family, but at least the man gets shit done without windbagging on about legacy or lions or cows.

It took me a minute to realize who the stepsister was and it's a little weird she wasn't referenced/shown before, but I guess they explained she was at her mom's. I get the rivalry, but even if she's only there every other weekend (though it seemed to be alternating weeks which would make more sense for their dynamic), if their parents married when they were 5/6, they likely met in preschool. I don't really buy that type of frosty animosity from her unless there was a huge blowup or (more realistically) if the marriage had happened in middle/high school, which would've better aligned with the storyline they're giving us. Kate said they never really interact. So the stepsister has just been sulking around or glowering at Kate since age 4? When she presumably lives there half the time? That doesn't track. I'm interested to see how her possible impending hookup with Jeanette's brother plays out, though. Shockingly, Mallory scored my only laugh of the episode with "Wow, you're even worse than you'd think you would be!" She was, dare I say, borderline tolerable for the first time? I was very interested in her dynamic with Kate. Sure it's codependent, but it feels much more affectionate and genuine as opposed to Mallory's friendship with Jeanette and Vince, which is basically bullying. I thought Olivia Holt brought a much easier, more relaxed performance out of Mallory's actress that made Mallory feel like a real person for the first time instead of a zany caricature. They make wonderful scene partners and I was surprised how much Kate cares for Mallory. I love that Kate is just genuinely sweet and loving. Their friendship also has heavy lesbian undertones, but I know they won't go there because Vince fills their gay quota, which is disappointing lol. I didn't miss Jeanette at all and I'm kind of reluctant to switch back to her. Kudos to the show for making the queen bee the soft, stealth protagonist and subverting the whole "pity the nerd girl" trope. I also think it's a cool twist that Jeanette's "unpopularity" is more a result of her own insecurities and apparent resentments as opposed to being bullied by Kate or anyone else. The trailer implied that Kate was perhaps snobby and ignored Jeanette, when really it's just Jeanette's own perverse fixation on a casual acquaintance. Especially creepy given Kate's attempts to befriend her.

If that's true, it's an insult to both character and actor. He carried the show in S1 - the plot literally revolved around him from the pilot onward. Damon worked hard, graduated college, and became a professional dancer and house father. Arguably the most realistic, attainable, full-circle arc of any character. His arc was done (really everyone's arcs were which is why they should've stopped at S2 but especially his). I get that the actor apparently had a sudden family tragedy and don't blame him stepping away. His storyline was already wrapped up in a bow. Say he moved, say he's touring, say he founded his own dance program, whatever. The best they could come up with was "he's a drunk now and our biggest family shame" when Damon won't even be coming back for redemption or resolution? It's a shame that he won't bookend the series.

Sadly, the premiere only made me wish the show had ended after S2. Most have already pointed out the obvious - Blanca and Pray’s HIV/AIDS is plot convenient to the point of almost being insulting. If we’re being honest, Blanca would definitely be dead by now and probably Pray too, given his years of alcoholism on top of what I'm assuming would be an aggressive HIV drug cocktail. Blanca could barely walk in 1991, but she is magically totally healthy and asymptomatic by 1994 to the point where she’s pursuing a nursing degree? Basically the writers needed her healthy so that she could live out a fanfiction fantasy and fuck a hot doctor. I am sure this series will end with her living in New York’s most exclusive gated community. Of course I want all the characters to succeed, but it looks like they are going the way of every single character in the cast ending rich and successful, which almost feels disrespectful to the original narratives that the show tried to highlight. It kind of sends the message that their original lives were never good enough. And yeah, what happened to those 12-year-olds Blanca took in in '91? They didn't even get a throwaway explanation. I thought they'd at least get a subplot, but I goes we needed Dr. Bangable instead. As much as I love Billy Porter, it annoys me when a show picks a star actor and then seemingly writes the entire show around giving them Emmy submission material even if the plots are retreads and it takes focus away from the (usually more interesting) supporting cast. Ricky’s actor knocked their breakup scene out of the park though. There was so much palpable devastation and heartbreak in his face when Pray closed the door on him. To be honest I’m surprised that they stayed a couple, let alone years later. I always assumed that the relationship was more of a fling because of the eroticism of the taboo but apparently they’d been playing house for years. Alright then. It’s also weird of them to possibly be setting up another love triangle with Damon if Pray/Ricky have been together for years longer than he and Damon were. They even managed to turn Angel/Papi into a downer. We already did the whole “Angel dabbles in drugs” storyline last season. Hopefully her choosing outpatient rehab means that we don’t have to waste any more plot on that. It was nice to see Papi successful, but of course Angel has to immediately make it all about herself and her insecurities. And how do the two of them afford that massive loft if she hasn’t been booking any gigs? Did Papi land a job as an editor at Vogue or something? lol I respect that the show embraces a good hammy villain, but Lemar is just...lethal levels of cheese. It's embarrassing that the writers think his monologues actually work. All he's missing is a cat to pet and a mustache to twirl. Papi's loyalty to Blanca remains a highlight. He never disappoints and will always be the best character. The love just radiates off of him.

Agreed! I've never seen a performance that accurate. I didn't recognize Evan Peters with the dye job and the fact that he looks much older than his other roles, but that was a masterclass. He's really holding his own opposite Kate Winslet and it's a fucking delight. He's rapidly becoming my favorite character. To each their own. I thought it was a moment of genuine vulnerability that gave his character a great deal of depth beyond "straight- laced sidekick who gawks at Mare's brashness." He has struggles and disappointments too and indulges in a bit of self-pity while still extending empathy and concern for Mare. It added a lot of complexity to their dynamic. And it could just be because I'm becoming very attracted to Evan Peters (see above), but the end of that exchange was pretty sexy, even if he was sloppy drunk. "Maybe I wanna stay with you" was a very coy way of laying his ambiguous attraction out there without seeming cringeworthy or desperate. I never thought my main viewing objective would be hoping Kate Winslet and Evan Peters hook up, but here we are. I know! So we're just supposed to chalk that up to a minor character misstep and...keep rooting for her? When she planted drugs on an (estranged) family member who's in recovery to retain custody of her small child? And Mare is still supposedly an anti-hero? ...Okay. Her characterization is really OTT unlikable sprinkled with all these Mary Sue moments, which is an odd combo. I'm getting a heavy Sharp Objects vibe from Siobhan. I wouldn't be surprised if she turns out to be involved in either case.

Mick's comments about Jess' family were wrong, but how douchey of her to set up that dinner specifically to tattle on him when they both know they're not staying together and she's actively trying to cheat on him. Just let the man go. So Ning basically admitted in front of Mark that she has no attraction to him, but then decides to settle for him when her friends point out how nice he is. Mark carried himself well during that. "He's not what you want, but he's what you need" is a pretty backhanded way to describe anyone's partner, much less to their face. Ning blaming her baggage and rambling about walls is just a way of circle talking around her lack of sexual attraction to him, imo. Nic and Billy both need to get out ASAP. It's just constant verbal abuse and walking on eggshells, especially for Nic.

This show gets worse every week and is approaching near lethal hamminess. I cannot believe they had Cheyenne growl and roar in separate scenes - unironically as a supposed moment of Cool Girl Feminist Empowerment. Cringe, cringe, cringe. The secondhand embarrassment for the actress is overwhelming. The reveal of the freezer body makes Mary's reaction to Ronald seem retrospectively out of character. You're telling me that a woman who has been casually storing the corpse of her niece's father in her basement for years is going to be trembling and whispering and cowering around a dweeb like Ronald? And then just open the door for him? She'd kill him herself. I'd be much more interested in watching a dual stalking cat-and-mouse scenario between them than watching Ronald magically Houdini away from Cassie for the 30th time. This show really hates living love interests. Both Jenny and Cassie have dead partners and Blake lasted about 5 minutes. The show is pushing romantic undertones between Cassie and Older Sad Detective and I don't feel like they have that kind of chemistry, but at this rate I'm sure he'll drop dead after they have sex for the first time. I miss Baker & the Beauty so much!!! It was so wholesome and unique. Tbh I'd rather watch that over Big Sky. This week, Blake is killed instantly by one shovel whack without any visible injuries or blood. Next week, Jenny is all but guaranteed to survive a semi plowing directly through her hotel room. Got it. Nice to see Ryan Dorsey working after everything he's endured. Overall, I doubt this will get a second season, which is a shame because I really like Kylie Bunbury and every TV show she's in gets cancelled. I don't see Big Sky breaking that streak unfortunately.

My one complaint is that the acting really seemed to take a nosedive this episode, lol. All the kids had really flat line deliveries during moments that were supposed to be incredibly emotional. Mallory is super annoying. Both the writers and the character herself are trying way too hard to establish her as "the quirky one." Re: Vince, I just assumed he was bisexual and didn’t necessarily take him dating a guy to mean that his crush on Jeanette wasn’t real because he seemed pretty defensive when Mallory called him out on it, although he could still possibly be gay. Claiming random crushes to fit in and avoid suspicion is pretty common. Looks like they’re setting up Jeanette's mom to be a secret sociopath as well. Let’s just hope that Kate and Jeanette aren’t secretly sisters, that reveal that she dated Kate’s dad had me sweating. This episode gave more credence to my theory that Martin was framed by Jeanette. Now it’s established then Janette will probably start casually breaking into the house all the time for a thrill. I still don’t really think he knew, although now that I think about it didn’t the preview show him saying something to Kate? But it could just be editing. The time hopping remains clever and I really loved the montage of Jeanette going from room to room and Martin’s house in all three timelines, but jumping through all three timelines in multiple scenes gets really confusing. Sometimes it feels like they can barely have a single conversation in one timeline before it jumps. I’m also not a fan of the heavy blue filter to delineate 1995. This isn’t Twilight. We understand that they are depressed and we already have the different hairstyles so it bugs me.

I feel like the show is about to get cancelled because no one's on here, lol. Agreed! Also cosign the lack of believability that legal powerhouse Kathleen would hire a flighty mid-20s glorified intern to defend her against potential suspicion of murder, ffs. Pure fanfiction. Callie facing off against Jaime worked pretty well, though, which is obviously what this plot is built around. I'm sure Callie will be shocked to discover Jaime has become the feds' lead prosecutor by the time the trial rolls around. Not kidding, I said "What happened to Isabella?" and she popped up 3 seconds later. What a cliche "twist." Totally calling fake pregnancy, because there's no way the writers would saddle eye candy Gael with a baby, much less one with a side character. Speaking of, what are they doing with her characterization? Are they still going the Single White Female route? She was this mysterious enigma last block with all kinds of questionable motives, only for the writers to totally dispose of her this block until they needed her to return with Chekov's fetus. Did anyone even mention her? So are Callie and Gael like...the designated Official Couple of the show now? Because 1) I don't see it and 2) throwing in a supposed baby as a roadblock is melodramatic as hell and they're going through an awful lot of will they/won't they for a friends-with-benefits arrangement. Just let them look pretty and fuck. On that note, now that Mariana and Evan don't work together, it looks like he just sits around his gigantic loft waiting to have sex with her, which makes me laugh. The app storyline bores me to tears, but I could appreciate the continuity of the salary thing coming back to bite her. Why does Malika have to have all her non-monogamy convo/thoughts around the pool? Is it the Pool of Polyamory or something? For being a very interesting premise, that plot has become repetitive very quickly. She just cries while the guys sit there. Oh, Davia's new dude, we (literally) hardly knew ye. Sure, he redefined milquetoast, but I still viscerally cringed when Dennis reappeared. Dennis is just so, so selfish and horrible for Davia's mental health. You know she'll going running back to Dennis as soon as he blinks in her direction, ugh.

I loved Kate's stepdad! Also into Kate being a nice debutante instead of a cliche mean girl. I think she's going to get back at Jeanette by taking her friends and dating the one that's supposedly in love with Jeanette (that revelation came out of nowhere and imo there was nothing that established his apparent unrequited crush so they have to be setting up something - I'm thinking Jeanette realizes feelings for him in 1995 after Kate starts dating him). Hopefully they both drop greaser boy. He lost me when he punched Jeanette. And from Kate's POV, I get craving normalcy, but why would you go back to someone who not only started dating someone else within weeks of your disappearance (which is a huge red flag for involvement), but also picked the girl who essentially dedicated herself to taking your identity? It's been established Jeanette has a key to Martin's place and knows her way around the basement. I think she either knew Kate was there much earlier than Kate thinks or (conspiracy theory) she's the one who held Kate captive without Martin's knowledge. Hasn't been revealed yet - I assumed divorced based on the tight timeline and Jeanette's rudeness to his gf (possible cheating), but the show seems super committed to the mirroring concept, so I wouldn't be surprised if they killed off Jeanette's mom to have a dead parent parallel between her and Kate.

Jeanette's actress looks like Joey King. She seems to be the strongest thus far. Olivia Holt is also doing a great job, although her weaving in and out of a Texas accent every third line is a bit distracting. Thought this would be a murder mystery and I'm much more intrigued by the actual premise. The constant time jumping makes it hard to keep storyline details straight, but it's very artistically engaging.

Ronald's actor is superb. The strongest in the cast. He conveys his desperation to be loved in a way that's very soft and sympathetic - almost makes you forget what a murderous little creep he is. Very intrigued by the reveal that his new gf might be just as twisted as him. That kissing negotiation was...something. I was under the impression that the taser was negative reenforcement for him, not a kink in itself.

Malika's storyline is interesting, but very poorly executed. You don't ambush your partner with your therapist to pressure them into accepting polyamory. The bigger issue is that she lied to Isaac multiple times about being attracted to Dyonte, so that's already starting with an atmosphere of mistrust. So Alice tries to take Davia's advice and play hard-to-get with Ruby, only to be dumped. Why can't she ever win? I'm very bored with Marianna and the tech ladies. I wish they'd get the Evan reveal over with so we could see where things will actually go, but I think they're saving that for the finale. I'm guessing Gael will get upset with the artist for using/claiming his work.

I think it's better that they aren't legally married because I think trying to pressure the US couples with the legality/stigma of a divorce is asinine, especially since most of them have made up their minds about leaving before the 2 week mark. But this whole partner musical chairs thing is getting ridiculous. The cast should not be your go-to dating pool when things are fizzling with your partner. Cannot believe Jess blatantly hit on 2 different men - and switched her conquest in the middle of one dinner party! Watching the experts react to her flirtation was hilarious. Agree that Cyrell should have been removed from the show for physical violence. Loyal or not, Nic is far better off leaving her. He's in a no-win situation when it comes to deciding whether or not to reveal Jess actually made a pass at him this time (so was the leg rubbing rumor a scheme hatched by Jess to piss off Cyrell so she could steal Nic? I don't get it. Why stir the pot with fake accusations if you decide to outright proposition him a few days later?). That revelation will be the end of Nic & Cyrell either way. Speaking of stirring the pot, Dan certainly wasted no time. He's not even hiding entertaining Jess. He just fucked Tamara what, 48 hours prior, after she sobbed to him about her dead mom? What a douchebag. I laughed when Tamara sat on his lap next to Jess and Jess didn't move. And Jess untying her dress in front of him! That was an Ines move for sure.

Poor Bronson basically shrugged and was unceremoniously booted off without saying much at all. Why was Lizzie given a second chance, but not him?

Alice's out-of-nowhere crush on Callie was the most interesting part of the episode. Their (dream) kiss was pretty hot - Maia really went for it! With that said, I'm not at all excited for what looks like yet another person patronizing Alice and letting her down...and of course Callie will, because it's Callie. I know Alice suddenly being into her isn't Callie's fault, but I don't like how we were already being primed for Callie to reject Alice before she was even aware of the attraction. It's almost like the narrative was encouraging us to laugh at Alice for actually believing she'd have a shot with Callie. Joey, Lindsay, Suki...now Ruby using her for sex and her unrequited Callie crush...why does everyone love walking all over Alice? Why is everyone always condescending to her or manipulating her? Why do the writers dislike her so much? I was really hoping she'd finally have a genuine relationship with Ruby. Marianna didn't deserve the nice, bittersweet Raj closure B-plot when she still hasn't told him she fucked Evan while they were together. Glad to see Davia finally moving on, although I'm sure douchebag Dennis will reappear just in time to fuck up Matt asking her to be official or something. Not looking forward to Gael and Callie hooking up again. He deserves better. Are people not watching the show anymore? This board is a ghost town.

so basically, the producers saw that Erik had issues with Rocky and decided to milk a whole episode out of it by making everyone do activities with their dogs to set the stage for an Erik/Virginia fight. I’m sure Virginia appreciated that. I know most people here aren’t huge Virginia fans and I agree she drinks way too much (which also creates some of the fights when lightweight Erik can’t hold his liquor but tries to keep up). However, I’m firmly team Virginia and increasingly so as the episodes progress. Erik is a condescending, gaslighting manipulator. He sees Rocky as an extension of his wife - a problem child that has to be tamed into obedience. I was disturbed during their Conversation where Virginia was nervously trying to keep Rocky off Erik because I didn’t want him to snap at either of them. Every time the dog does something he doesn’t like, it will be her fault. Notice he never says HIS dog needs training. And even if he doesn’t, a good way of making the criticism seem softer or more indirect is to compromise and say let’s send both of the dogs to training! Even if deep down you secretly only think one of them needs it. So now Virginia is going to be walking on eggshells and living in fear of being reprimanded for the dog? I get that he seems kind of hyper and whiny at times, but I don’t think it warrants that level of condescension or lecturing. Rocky was just trying to be friendly and get him to play on the couch and didn’t seem to be aggressive or trying to nip Erik at all. He will always find things to correct and criticize her about. Virginia needs to leave - the audio fight while Rocky was sitting on the couch said everything we need to know about what their life would be like post cameras. I feel really bad for her, especially because he never seems to care when she gets upset and just says some variation of “ what I said or what happened was reasonable so I don’t get why you’re upset (so I’ve decided you’re unjustified)” instead of trying to understand her feelings or be self-reflective in any way. You know when Vinny gives you advice to admit you’re wrong, you’ve already lost. Whoever his friend was that said he was worried that Erik would mess things up by treating his marriage like a coaching session was right. Haley and Jake are almost too boring to comment on. Yeah she’s running out the clock, but he also totally ignores her in every conversation. Plus he constantly bugs her about when things will get romantic again as a part of “trying” but he already knows she’s not attracted to him, so it just feels like a guilt trip and it’s very uncomfortable. I do think she’s being disingenuous by trying to save face and pretend like she’s committed until decision day, but for lack of a more eloquent way of putting it, he’s also very self-pitying and whiny. If Jake thinks he can guilt trip or dad joke her back into bed, keep dreaming. I don’t understand how they ever had sex, but mostly I don’t understand why either of them are still there. I think Haley’s friend calling her out for not being attracted to Jake for superficial reasons really stuck with her and now she is staying to prove to herself she’s not shallow or whatever. Clara and Ryan’s sex arrangement made a tiny bit of sense when it just seemed like he was avoiding intercourse for whatever reason. But her comment tonight implied that nothing has ever been reciprocated. So...she just jerks him off every night and he goes to sleep? And she keeps letting him circle talk to her about how sex is so meaningful to him and that’s why they can’t have it yet? I don’t think there could be any clearer signal that someone obviously wasn’t attracted to you. Even though I don’t get asking someone you’re not attracted to to get you off, if I were Ryan, I would feel progressively more embarrassed and awkward that I was asking someone to do that on a daily basis and not reciprocating anything. But Ryan certainly seems cool with it! What a douche. Even Zac didn’t do that. Loved Vinny dancing for Cookie!

No, I saw that too. It's just more shitty avant garde editing. I assumed the voiceover lines were supposed to be internal monologue, but it just looked like a glitch. Callie is very immature and selfish. I think her doubts will get the better of her and she'll realize Jaime was telling the truth. I dread Alice's plot, although they're making an important point about the comedy scene. Can Alice never do anything fun? Everyone is always shitting all over her. At least she hooks up with someone next week, though I didn't recognize them. That comes out of nowhere since she hasn't interacted with anyone beyond Lindsey lately. Looks like next week is some sort of horny spiritual ceremony and a thinly-veiled premise for a sex montage. I'm in.

Wait, Bronson is a millionaire? I must've forgotten. Ironic that Ines said that Lizzie should be content with a purely sexual relationship with Sam because he's an obvious player, only to fall for him herself and envision a future with him after one night together. (Lack of) Morality aside, if he's immediately repelled by the idea of even dating someone he's super attracted to, how did he ever think he could convincingly pull off being a "husband" for weeks? I can't believe Heidi is imploding her relationship with Mike over him not including her in resolving 1) a miscommunication that overdramatic Jess of all people brushed off as no big deal in hindsight (even more significant as she's picked pointless fights with him before) and 2) never involved Heidi to begin with. So Heidi is sabotaging her marriage in protest of...being unable to patronizingly co-lecture/co-parent Jess? She's acting like Jess is their daughter. Jess may act 18, but she's 27. Watching Heidi unravel over that was very bizarre. Wishing we had more Jules/Cam and Michael/Martha...and really anyone who isn't Sam/Ines/Lizzie at this point. I know she's the victim in this scenario, but Lizzie is very annoying this season. Who gives a shit about the thumb in the mouth!!!

Well, it was obvious that Matt and Lauren were done and I'm glad. I didn't like Lauren's insinuation that he used her to lose his virginity. I think he liked her and was looking forward to semi-regular vanilla sex and would've been perfectly content with that. Some people just don't need or want sex or they have a lower sex drive. There's nothing wrong with that and it makes me uncomfortable that she made him doubt his sexuality immediately. She just wanted constant, kinky sex - which is also fine, but there's a huge compatibility issue there and she set herself up to fail by neglecting to mention sexual preferences in the matching process. Asexuality is also very real and not a dealbreaker in relationships if you communicate and/or find someone with a similar outlook on sex. I just feel bad he thinks there's something wrong with him now.

While Kathleen was also very in the wrong, it was refreshing to see Callie brought back to reality for once. Too often the show turns her into an untouchable social justice Mary Sue. Davia remains too immature to be a teacher. Gael was very kind and supportive. For a second I thought they would actually have sex even though they've set up her coworker as an eventual love interest. I'm very tired of the Dennis pity party and honestly I'd be fine if he were written off permanently. Mariana and her heavy-handed "girl power" storyline became extremely cringe this week. It's very paint-by-numbers feminism. It felt like one of those 1980s sex ed PSAs except about sexism, lol. I get what they're trying to say, it's just...painfully unsubtle. Of course Jaime is working Yvonne's case. Apparently LA has 15 lawyers.

lol! A true Freudian slip!

I thought Jesus/Emma facetimed in last reunion ep to announce they were engaged (?) and living abroad to explain Noah likely never returning to the show again, lol. It's hilarious to me that he's the breakout star from The Fosters. Nice to see Connor! It reminded me how little a care about Carter or his relationship with Jude. Carter's actor really sold his coming out scene, though. I hope Jude's actor has moved past his rumored feud with Connor's actor since their parents are dating now??? Thanks for the info @ShortyMac. Hayden Byerly always seemed deeply uncomfortable with playing gay when he was younger, so it's ironic that it's continued to indirectly shape his personal life. He'll never escape Connor when they're stepbrothers! Brandon's "announcements" are always nothing. The weird make up/hate sex between Jaime and Callie made no sense. Clogging made them horny? Also, Callie would've totally cut Stef off irl because ACAB and performative activism. Not looking forward to returning to the melancholy woke-off of the Coterie. This episode proves that fluff is solid content and I wish the show would go back to lighter fare more often.

Lauren really lost me this week. On one hand, I get it and I’m trying to sympathize. Obviously everyone wants to feel wanted by their partner and I would imagine it doesn’t exactly feel erotic to have to act as someone’s sexual training wheels. But…where the hell did her skyscraper libido come from? She literally took this guy’s virginity 4 days ago and is now saying “become Christian Grey or don’t bother.” Not even taking the virgin aspect into account, but she had to know that someone as awkward as Matt would have zero frame of reference for things like BDSM and swinging. There’s also a chasm of difference between “I dated women before” (which is really just more of a factual statement than a stumbling block) and “if you want to satisfy me, I expect you to be into threesomes.” And based on how taken aback the experts were by her dinner party over sharing, she neglected to tell them how kinky she was during the interview process, which would have obviously been an automatic disqualifier for her being paired with Matt. If she “needs“ a BDSM dynamic so badly that she considers it essential for the success of any future relationship she’s in, she absolutely should’ve disclosed that in the interview process. I think being with an adult virgin can go one of two ways: either they have so much pent-up libido that they just want to have sex all the time, or because they’ve gone without it their entire lives, they’re either hesitant to explore after years of insecurity or flat out indifferent to it. I think Lauren was hoping that giving Matt his first taste would turn him into some kind of bodice-ripping sex machine behind closed doors, but anyone who has had a five minute conversation with him would be able to tell that that would never be in his personality, whether or not he’s attracted to her. Speaking of which, I think he’s also overthinking the lack of attraction because she’s equated attraction with insatiable horniness and kink. he’s never been in a position to expect sex, much less develop niche preferences, so I think he’s just kind of assuming that he’s not attracted to her because he doesn’t want to have sex in the way she likes or as frequently as she does, when in reality I think it’s just a massive difference in libido and the fact that she’s introducing him to kink in the worst way possible. “Unless you have sex with me like this, there’s no chance we’re going to work" is a terrible way to try to get your partner interested in new acts/dynamics, much less when they've just had sex for the first time. She’s not really considering what he would want or like because she’s presuming that since she’s the more sexually experienced one, that gives her the right to dictate their sex life. I would not have pegged Lauren (no pun intended) as the stealth horny participant. The more she brags about her wild sexual past, the less I like her - not because there’s anything wrong with kink or threesomes, but because she’s using it to pressure Matt into becoming something he’s not and gatekeeping their sex life with her presumed superiority instead of considering his desires or perspective. And I hate to break it to you, Lauren, but being kinky doesn’t make you interesting or give you a personality. I had to roll my eyes at her lamenting that she “doesn’t ask for much” because she basically gave him a laundry list of sexual ultimatums! Watching Ines attempt to seductively kiss Sam’s forehead chicken pox was nauseating. That won’t be suspicious at all when she contracts it. They flirt like 15-year-olds.

I thought Clara basically admitted doing everything but (which I assumed to be oral). Unless Ryan's lying, I think he finds her decently attractive, but is turned off by her love fixation and views her as overly emotional (too much talking, constant discussion of feelings, falling in and out of love very easily, plus Ryan seemingly has an incredibly flat personality without much emotion). He doesn't want to make things messier with sex. I think Ryan is running out the clock just like Haley, but he's being much more amicable about it, which is giving her mixed signals. Eric is infatuated with Virginia because she's the hottest woman he's ever been with and the age gap strokes his ego and makes him feel powerful. That's pretty much it. I did feel for her when she said her sister's relationship was the first healthy example she'd seen. After the adorable bike gift, Vinny really took a nosedive. He seems like he has serious anger issues triggered over nothing. You're sulking because you can't dance salsa, really? It would be exhausting constantly trying to anticipate and talk him down from his mood swings, never knowing if he's going to ruin date night or a friendly gathering. Jake and Haley are both pretty awkward and I wouldn't date either of them, but it's annoying watching her gaslight Jake when imo he's just trying to save her time and give her an out because he knows she's not into him.