S09.E01: Nice To Marry You

[Gem 10]

3 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

can't really judge by body language in the wedding photos since they are so posed.

When you see the picture, you will know what I mean.

[gonecrackers]

I found pics of the couples at this link, & Elizabeth is not pulling away:

https://www.eonline.com/news/1037380/meet-the-cast-of-married-at-first-sight-season-9#photo-1001329

But again none of these pics mean anything to me as wedding photos are very posed & they literally just met.

Also, for all we know production might be involved in the poses to give us something else to wonder about.

[topanga]

4 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

I think if Deonna had a rough relationship she was wise to take time off, work on herself, & achieve what she wanted with her education, instead of jumping into another, then another, then another... just because someone has had multiple (even long term) relationships, doesn't mean they're good at it.

I agree. But I’m curious whether she swore off dating completely for 10 years. If so, that means she hasn’t had adult experience being in a romantic relationship. And I’m not talking about sex—I’m talking about communicating, resolving conflict, balancing career and leisure time, financial issues, possible career jealousy, etc. And what are her expectations in a relationship if she hasn’t been in one for ten years. 

—I suppose we’ll learn more over these next few weeks. 

But did our experts delve into any of these topics with her, I wonder?

[Yeah No]

On 6/14/2019 at 9:15 PM, Neurochick said:

I wonder if anybody is really ready for marriage.  It seems that every season, we all see the red flags.  

This one has a "creepy" relationship with her dad/This one has no relationship with his parents/This one's a virgin/This one hasn't been in a relationship in 10 years/This one just got out of a relationship/This one is too religious/This one looks like a player.

People aren't perfect; everybody has flaws; everybody has "red flags" depending on who's looking.

You're right of course, but as we have all said at least once before, it does look like the show goes out of its way to pick people with issues that make good TV.  Like Matt and Amber, they both love basketball, but can they get past the height difference?  And Iris being the virgin, will her husband be able to accept her and how will that play out?  And come on, with all those guys to choose from they have to pick "Mr. Picky"???  As if that isn't an obvious freight train full of red flags coming at us at 90 miles an hour already.  It's almost like they pick people and match them to sound like the plot of a soap opera or bad movie.  If they didn't do that all the couples would be like Bobby and Danielle or Ashley and Anthony.  In both their cases the show tried to invent issues between them just to create drama.

[Yeah No]

On 6/14/2019 at 6:48 PM, qtpye said:

Great observation. Crazily, the real Kathy and Jerry did not get along, to the point of him actually making it a plot point in one of the episodes of his show.

Ah, I remember that now, thanks for reminding me!!  When I thought of that it was in the back of my mind somewhere I am sure.  Now I'm going to have to find that episode and watch it, lol.

[Yeah No]

On 6/16/2019 at 4:41 PM, princelina said:

Whether they know what the word means or not - "writing their own vows" seems to have become just stating whatever's on their minds.  If you watch Four Weddings - they sing, they rap, they love and adore, they feel so lucky to be marrying their best friend, they join their hearts, they blend sand and food coloring and wine and chocolate . . . but they make very few promises.

This is very true.  Having watched "Four Weddings" for years I learned that today's young people don't tend to write "vows" in the sense of promises like people used to when writing their own vows.  I think people today know that whatever promises they make they might end up breaking so why make a solemn promise if they might not be able to keep it?  In some ways that's a realistic thing but from another angle it's kind of sad too.  Promises and vows signify commitment, and I wonder if choosing to omit those or trivialize them in some way points to a lack of real commitment.....Which on this show doesn't really surprise me anyway.

[Yeah No]

4 hours ago, PityFree said:

Good question!  My younger sister did not choose me to be her maid of honor at her wedding  and it’s always stung—especially since she rarely talks to her maid of honor anymore.  Every time she asks me to do a favor for her, I remember it. (I know! It’s petty of me.)

Not to go off topic but if I had a sister that did that she would know how I felt about it pretty quickly, and before the wedding.  But that's me.

But you never know about Amber.  She and her sister may have had a prior understanding and agreement about not being each other's MOH.  It might be one of those "gotta be an individual apart from my twin" things.  Because they share so much closeness already they might feel OK about each other choosing their BFF's for that role.

[Gem 10]

15 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

I found pics of the couples at this link, & Elizabeth is not pulling away:

https://www.eonline.com/news/1037380/meet-the-cast-of-married-at-first-sight-season-9#photo-1001329

But again none of these pics mean anything to me as wedding photos are very posed & they literally just met.

Also, for all we know production might be involved in the poses to give us something else to wonder about.

These pictures are very nice.  The one I saw were of the four couples together and Elizabeth didn’t look too happy and was not leaning toward him.  These are different.

[Gem 10]

13 hours ago, Yeah No said:

You're right of course, but as we have all said at least once before, it does look like the show goes out of its way to pick people with issues that make good TV.  Like Matt and Amber, they both love basketball, but can they get past the height difference?  And Iris being the virgin, will her husband be able to accept her and how will that play out?  And come on, with all those guys to choose from they have to pick "Mr. Picky"???  As if that isn't an obvious freight train full of red flags coming at us at 90 miles an hour already.  It's almost like they pick people and match them to sound like the plot of a soap opera or bad movie.  If they didn't do that all the couples would be like Bobby and Danielle or Ashley and Anthony.  In both their cases the show tried to invent issues between them just to create drama.

You are absolutely right.  BTW, how u doin?  It’s been awhile that I’ve seen u on the board, unless I’m in the wrong places.

[aphroditewitch]

14 hours ago, Yeah No said:

You're right of course, but as we have all said at least once before, it does look like the show goes out of its way to pick people with issues that make good TV.  Like Matt and Amber, they both love basketball, but can they get past the height difference?  And Iris being the virgin, will her husband be able to accept her and how will that play out?  And come on, with all those guys to choose from they have to pick "Mr. Picky"???  As if that isn't an obvious freight train full of red flags coming at us at 90 miles an hour already.  It's almost like they pick people and match them to sound like the plot of a soap opera or bad movie.  If they didn't do that all the couples would be like Bobby and Danielle or Ashley and Anthony.  In both their cases the show tried to invent issues between them just to create drama.

I feel like the height difference is potentially not much of a problem, if Amber and Matt really get along and are attracted to each other. 

Iris being a virgin is a much bigger issue because she puts so much value on being one. If she was someone who was just socially awkward and had spent a ton of time in various programs like Bachelors, Masters, then Doctorate programs one right after the other and just didn't spend a lot of time focusing on her love life, it might be different but that is not the case here. 

I'm hoping we are not going to get another Dave and Amber from Dallas with Elizabeth and Jamie. Elizabeth seems feistier than Amber so hopefully she will turn any pickiness for Jamie around on him. 

The show picks obvious disaster matches. But I think some of the biggest trainwrecks were ones they did not plan for. I don't think Sonia and Nick for example were meant to be a trainwreck. 

[nutella fitzgerald]

18 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

I found pics of the couples at this link, & Elizabeth is not pulling away:

https://www.eonline.com/news/1037380/meet-the-cast-of-married-at-first-sight-season-9#photo-1001329

But again none of these pics mean anything to me as wedding photos are very posed & they literally just met.

Also, for all we know production might be involved in the poses to give us something else to wonder about.

Does this picture remind anyone else of Hulu’s promo shot for The Act? Am I just the worst person ever?

21 hours ago, Gem 10 said:

I’m having trouble with my DVR and while watching interference, Jamie popped up somehow, and had long blonde hair and gigantic boobs. Lol.  Guess her gig is profitable.  Back to Optimum and my problem.

I forgot about that Jamie and definitely thought this post was about the Charlotte groom. Oops.

[PityFree]

17 hours ago, Yeah No said:

Not to go off topic but if I had a sister that did that she would know how I felt about it pretty quickly, and before the wedding.  But that's me.

Oh, she knew. And my parents were as annoyed as I was. And when I am annoyed at her these days, I remind her. At the time I had other things to worry about so I decided it wasn’t a battle worth fighting (I was working full time, in grad school, and starting to date the groomsman I was paired with). Today, 25 years later, she says she does regret not choosing me. Life with siblings, right?

[ECM1231]

On 6/15/2019 at 12:36 PM, red12 said:

No. I have never met anyone who is; just like having children. One can be more or less healthy than another but, I agree, no one is perfect.

In my view, marriage is partially about matching issues in a way that both people can be complimented by the couplehood on the road to becoming who they want to be. So, putting  a clearly sexually active, nonreligious man with a 27 year old virgin who has a very slim chance of being able to be a match for him in the arena of intimacy within 6 weeks is worthy of comment and observation.

Again, I agree no one is perfect but, if observing "red flags" was outlawed, what the hell would we be discussing about the show on this forum? 

Did I miss something?  Were we told that Keith is nonreligious? I know his grandmother is a minister and that doesn't always translate to him being religious, but I do know he said he would be upset if his grandparents did not approve of the route  he was taking and really wanted their approval. I guess I thought he was somewhat religious as religious and sexually active are not mutually exclusive.  I want them to succeed and make beautiful babies! 

[STRIDER1]

On 6/17/2019 at 4:28 AM, humbleopinion said:

I can feel your love for the future Mrs. Amanda Strider....

By the power invested in me by Previously TV and now Primertimer,

I pronounce you TeeVee husband and TeeVee Wife....mazel tov!

 Amanda is prettier, younger version of Stephanie (SexyAF)

 You have excellent taste in your  choice of TeeVee spouse....

Wanna make a bet that Amanda, Amber and Megan all applied to MAFS and Amanda and Megan didn't make the cut?

  Curious why did Amber choose Mrs. Amanda Strider to be Maid of Honor and not her twin, Megan?

Thanks buddy !!! I appreciate you tying the knot for us hahaha 👍👍

Hopefully we will have a very happy life together, in my mind lmao 😍😍❤️

As for the possibility of a triple MAFS wedding, that could be true. who knows right?

Cody from season 5 and either his brother or friend? I dont remember which one it was but both of them applied to MAFS.

Cody got picked and his brother or friend ended up going for one of danielles bridemaids instead when he wasnt chosen.

So yeah, anything is possible even tho they didnt mention it in the show, so far.

And as to why megan wasnt the maid of honor over amanda, your guess is as good as much buddy.

Hard to say unless there is a hidden rift between the 2, or maybe its just simply because amber is much closer to amanda than her twin sister megan. Tho I find that possibility hard to believe tbh.

In any case, since I already called dibs on my MAFS wifey amanda the amazing and we are now officially primetimer wed. This is a hands off notice to all the other fellas out there, shes all mine now lmao hahaha lol 😂😂😂

[STRIDER1]

On 6/17/2019 at 8:11 AM, Ohwell said:

Heh, I was actually wondering if Matt looked over and saw Amanda and wished she was matched with him instead of Amber.  Amanda sure looked like she was into him.

I wouldnt blame him if he actually did hahaha 😂

My TeeVee wifey, amanda the amazing is so smoking hot, that any guy would be thinking the same thing

 Quick update, we are expecting already lol   😛😛 woo hoo !!!

Congrats to us and drinks are on me for all primetimer MAFS members !!! 🍾🍾🍾

[red12]

20 hours ago, ECM1231 said:

Did I miss something?  Were we told that Keith is nonreligious? I know his grandmother is a minister and that doesn't always translate to him being religious, but I do know he said he would be upset if his grandparents did not approve of the route  he was taking and really wanted their approval. I guess I thought he was somewhat religious as religious and sexually active are not mutually exclusive.  I want them to succeed and make beautiful babies! 

He said he doesn't go to church nor is he interested in doing so when he was talking to the other black guy at the bachelor meet up, which I don't consider a problem but, most highly religious people do. The other guy looked kind of like "How Sway?" when Keith said it. I don't remember his exact words since it's been a week since I heard them. But, knowing this show, they will replay the scene 5 times before the season is finished so, it will come up again. 🙂

Maybe the couple will work out. I was using the pairing as an example of how I think the matches are made for TV more than real life.

Edited June 19, 2019 by red12

[Crazy Bird Lady]

On 6/18/2019 at 1:22 PM, aphroditewitch said:

I feel like the height difference is potentially not much of a problem, if Amber and Matt really get along and are attracted to each other. 

I agree. And hey, Matt can grab stuff off of high supermarket shelves for her!

Quote

Iris being a virgin is a much bigger issue because she puts so much value on being one. If she was someone who was just socially awkward and had spent a ton of time in various programs like Bachelors, Masters, then Doctorate programs one right after the other and just didn't spend a lot of time focusing on her love life, it might be different but that is not the case here. 

I don't think her being a virgin *should* be such a big deal. She's uber-religious (and possibly afraid of sex) so she's been "saving herself" for marriage. 

That means as soon as she's married --it's all good. Time for some good clean married fun, right?!

Just kidding. Unfortunately I don't think she'll "give it up" on her honeymoon, and I doubt she'll even "do it" before Decision Day. (Even a super-religious, unusually understanding hubby would be unlikely to keep waiting for her to be 'ready' that long).

Quote

I'm hoping we are not going to get another Dave and Amber from Dallas with Elizabeth and Jamie. Elizabeth seems feistier than Amber so hopefully she will turn any pickiness for Jamie around on him. 

Yeah, Dave and Amber were a horrible combination --and I still think the "experts" did that deliberately, just for drama. 

It was easy to get annoyed at Amber for being Amber --a weak-willed woman with very low self-esteem, such an easy target for a gaslighter like Dave to disrespect, manipulate, demean, and humiliate. 

But I agree with you, Elizabeth is no Amber!  If Jamie tried to gaslight or humiliate her, he might find himself crumpling like a used Kleenex. 

Edited June 19, 2019 by Crazy Bird Lady

[PityFree]

Awwww! Greg asked, “May I?” before kissing Deonna at the wedding. I love that!

[ShowFan]

Elizabeth’s dress and makeup were just dreadful. All the other brides looked gorgeous but I hated her dress and the hanging top. Makeup made her look like a man. 

[ShowFan]

As soon as Iris gets past the virginity thing she will discover she has a lot of oaths to sow...she is only starting late what most of us covered in our late teens/early 20s. 

[Nowhere]

Didn’t somebody post that Iris said she was technically a virgin? In other words, her ass and/or her mouth are not virgins. I’m sure she’s given her fair share of hand jobs and oral and probably received something. This gal is not nervous about losing her virginity. She’s excited about it because she’s done plenty with her other parts. And I’m sure she doesn’t have a fully intact hymen at the age of 27. 

[LuvMyShows]

On 6/17/2019 at 9:16 PM, gonecrackers said:

She looks like a 50-year old in this pic.  And he looks like he is barely tolerating her...it looks like he has placed his hand uneasily on her body rather than really touching her. 

On 6/17/2019 at 10:11 PM, topanga said:

I agree. But I’m curious whether she swore off dating completely for 10 years. If so, that means she hasn’t had adult experience being in a romantic relationship. And I’m not talking about sex—I’m talking about communicating, resolving conflict, balancing career and leisure time, financial issues, possible career jealousy, etc. And what are her expectations in a relationship if she hasn’t been in one for ten years. 

—I suppose we’ll learn more over these next few weeks. 

But did our experts delve into any of these topics with her, I wonder?

I just finished watching the matchmaking special (saw ep 1 first, I guess that's out of order), and it definitely seemed to me like she had not been doing any dating at all.  And she specifically said that the reason (whether it was not dating/relationships/whatever) had a lot to do with her previous relationship.  So it was definitely more than just being busy (with the usual life things that many people accomplish while still dating), because she mentioned not being pleased with how she behaved in that relationship.  I give her props for learning from it.  But like Topanga mentioned above, I am very concerned about all those other non-sex relationship aspects.  

[topanga]

On 6/19/2019 at 10:22 PM, ShowFan said:

As soon as Iris gets past the virginity thing she will discover she has a lot of oaths to sow...she is only starting late what most of us covered in our late teens/early 20s. 

I know what that's like. I rarely drank alcohol until I turned 40. I still don't drink a lot, but whenever I'm out with my friends, they sip their single drinks slowly, and I'm all, 'What's wrong with you? Let's have some fun.' They look at me and remind me that they already did have fun--20 years ago. LOL. 

16 hours ago, LuvMyShows said:

She looks like a 50-year old in this pic.  And he looks like he is barely tolerating her...it looks like he has placed his hand uneasily on her body rather than really touching her. 

Could it also be that he's not a fan of PDAs? It's possible, I suppose.  But if so, I don't know why he agreed to get married on a reality TV show and have his relationship filmed every day for the entire world to see. 

[Ohwell]

17 minutes ago, topanga said:

Could it also be that he's not a fan of PDAs? It's possible, I suppose.  But if so, I don't know why he agreed to get married on a reality TV show and have his relationship filmed every day for the entire world to see.

I think there's something "strange" about Jamie that I just can't put my finger on.  For example, when he first saw Elizabeth walking down the aisle and when they were saying their vows, he didn't look all that impressed with her.  But then when it was time for them to kiss, out of the blue he swooped in on her, bent her backwards and kissed her.  It was weird.

[amcfar]

Elizabeth is so INTENSE - the kind of person I can only handle in very, very low doses. Her wedding dress was so ill-fitting. You could even see the gore of her bra. The bodice/bust needed to be cinched in. Her makeup was so dark and her fake eyelashes were too much. I think she would've looked so much better with more natural/minimal makeup. She looks much better in that head shot shown earlier in this thread, for example. 

Amber seems to be laying it on pretty thick. Maybe that will bode well with Matt, maybe it won't. But I think perhaps playing a little harder to get wouldn't hurt in this kind of circumstance. Not overly so, like certain women from past seasons. But maybe she could stop with the "You're so hot! You're so cute! Kiss me right now! I want to make out with you right now!" every 1-2 minutes. Yikes! Slow your roll, girl!

I can't help but wonder if Matt will like the fact that she's a tomboy and normally never wears makeup or girly clothing. She was really done up for her wedding, so he doesn't know about any of that yet. It will be interesting to see how this all plays out. 

[Gem 10]

On 6/20/2019 at 6:24 PM, Nowhere said:

Didn’t somebody post that Iris said she was technically a virgin? In other words, her ass and/or her mouth are not virgins. I’m sure she’s given her fair share of hand jobs and oral and probably received something. This gal is not nervous about losing her virginity. She’s excited about it because she’s done plenty with her other parts. And I’m sure she doesn’t have a fully intact hymen at the age of 27. 

Does anyone here think that a guy is honored to marry a Virgin?  Does it really matter to him if she is or isn’t?  Being a Virgin is no big deal.  There are other things that can be done without having actual intercourse.  How would a guy know what she has done with someone else?  He doesnt.

[TwirlyGirly]

On 6/22/2019 at 8:55 PM, Gem 10 said:

Does anyone here think that a guy is honored to marry a Virgin?  Does it really matter to him if she is or isn’t?  Being a Virgin is no big deal.  There are other things that can be done without having actual intercourse.  How would a guy know what she has done with someone else?  He doesnt.

When a woman is a virgin for religious reasons, chances are she has no sexual experience with anyone - including herself. Men often don't want to take that on.

Let's face it; women are a bit more complicated sexually than men. Men usually depend on the woman to teach them what she likes. A woman who has no sexual experience and who doesn't know that about herself can be a lot of work. 

The Purity Movement often results in a lot of sexual dysfunction for women. Unrealistic expectations is only part of it. Often women think if they wait until marriage to have sex, they'll be "rewarded" with the best sex they can imagine. But of course it doesn't work that way.

Sexual compatibility isn't guaranteed just because you say "I do", whether you've known the groom for years and are compatible in every other way, or you've married a stranger.

And love is no guarantee you'll be able to agree on a compromise equally satisfactory to both of you, if, for example, you realize you want it every day and your husband thinks twice a month is just about right, or he's into a lot of experimentation and you prefer vanilla.

IOW, being a virgin is not always the "gift" women like Iris think it is.

[Drogo]

On ‎6‎/‎17‎/‎2019 at 1:00 PM, Gem 10 said:

Is she the one whose Father said “I hope he has a big penis”?  The redhead I mean.  If so, what Father talks like that?

"You were my first love, and you'll be my last love."  WHAT the actual shit is she talking about?

*Also... fuck you, Luke. We haven't forgotten.

[humbleopinion]

Big Red Chardonnay is a serious contender for bigger camera hog than JamieO.

 Outlandish proclamations about the icky inappropriate sexualized relationship she and her father share makes me want to wash my eyeballs and ears out after their segments...

I felt Drema's HARD eye roll as her daughter delivered with fake boohooing  the "You're were my first and will be my last love" minutes before Big Daddy Ronnie was to walk her down the aisle.

JealousRonnie loves being the Disrupter Father In Law who will loom large whether Jerry Seinfeld likes it or not because he signs his baby's paychecks....

Calling it now: Big Red Chardonnay facetiming and calling Ronnie to tell him she and Jerry Seinfeld had sex and then proceeds to describe his son in law's peniz...

Edited June 24, 2019 by humbleopinion

[RealHousewife]

I too thought that bridesmaid was beautiful! She looked like a model.

When it comes to sex, I do wish there weren’t so many extremes personally. I don’t judge those who wait until marriage, and if you can mess around without feelings and don’t catch anything, more power to you. I kind of believe in test driving before you buy, but I don’t like this culture where waiting a few months is considered forever. Why not a little balance? It sometimes takes me awhile to know whether or not I feel like a guy deserves me. I know sex is isn’t just for men, and I consider myself a sexual person. But I can go a long time without it, and it is a really horrible feeling to sleep with someone only to find out the guy is a huge jerk and not someone you want being able to claim he’s had you. I’m not religious but almost relate more to religious people in this department because I do believe sex is a big deal personally. Buying me dinner and sweet talk isn’t enough for me. I want to know you are a truly good person and not just trying to get laid. Most guys (and girls) are on their best behavior in the beginning. 

I do think if you’re going on a show to have an arranged marriage, which is an old school way, being set up with a virgin shouldn’t be as big a deal, because it’s also traditional. 

Edited June 24, 2019 by RealHousewife