Chris and Amy

[Dustbunny]

 

[floridamom]

I watched this 'rub' video. I kept hearing some sort of small 'bell' going off. I realized it must have been her bracelet. A no no when doing a cooking demonstration. The cook should not be wearing a watch or any bracelet. Why does she insist on doing these awful cooking segments? She isn't a proficient cook; she's unprepared and needs an actual printed-out from the compute recipe with her at all times. A professional cook/baker does not need this. She's unfamiliar with her own long-time recipes? How could this be? I agree she should get her hair out of the way!

[ginger90]

“The spices that are in this rub is...”.

I don’t normally comment on grammar.......but, there it is.

[Irate Panda]

She’s licking her fingers and then putting the rub on....nice🙄

[AZChristian]

Amy - if you don't want tears while you're chopping onions, there are two options:

1.  Hold a piece of bread in your mouth so that it's between the onion and your eyes.  It will absorb the odors.

2.  Get a damned onion chopper.  The piece of shallot she was chopping would have taken us 5 seconds to mince.

Some of us are old enough to remember when Dan Aykroyd was on Saturday Night Live.  His Julia Child sketch is a classic.  She herself loved it so much that she used to show it to guests in her home.

And it's not nearly as funny as Amy trying to look like a competent chef.

My "peeve of the day" . . . who keeps their paper towels six feet away and across the room from the sink?  Aren't they supposed to be right NEXT to the sink so you can dry your hands without dripping across the whole room?

And after rubbing her roast with her bare hands, she wipes them briefly on a paper towel, then opens a drawer and digs for a knife with rub remnants on her hands.  Sheesh. 

This woman has no business telling anyone how to do things in a kitchen.

[LucyEth]

5 hours ago, floridamom said:

I watched this 'rub' video. I kept hearing some sort of small 'bell' going off. I realized it must have been her bracelet.

I think that noise is the dogs collar, I heard it in other videos and the dog could be seen right there near the counter when Amy was going back and forth getting things.

3 hours ago, Irate Panda said:

She’s licking her fingers and then putting the rub on....nice🙄

Also licks her fingers preparing the cake.  

How about the potato pancakes?  Just left the shredded potatoes on a dish instead of in cold water, they turned completely brown.  I am sure they were fine but they looked disgusting and so did the finished pancakes.  

[floridamom]

So, how many of us will 'SUSSCRIBE' to her website? I can't believe the errors in this video. We never saw how she made her 'cake-cake' did we? There is nothing more appetizing than brown potatoes. Sorry, everyone knows that you put them in water to not 'turn brown'. She coughed two times in this video; licked her fingers; didn't property wash the rub off of her hands; then reached into a kitchen drawer for a knife. Who puts a used paper towel on the counter in which one is cooking or baking something. This is a video for the public to enjoy? I also noticed that she printed the rub recipe off of the internet. If this is her own invented rub and sauce, why is she so unfamiliar with it's ingredients? Awful just awful. Oh, and don't forget the 'papArica'!  

[AZChristian]

If she has ANY dream of a cooking show (or even a level of success on youtube), she needs to have a professional watch and critique her.  Experience would show, though, that she's not interested in listening to advice from anyone.

I just feel kind of bad that she doesn't realize that a lot of people watch her just to laugh or snark.  But not bad enough to stop doing it myself.

[DonnaMae]

So many things wrong with this video.  Where do I begin?

Why does she keep repeating who she is?  And why does she act so coy and cutesy?  It almost looked like she was curtsying at the beginning.

Her work station is a mess.  Giada always tosses peelings and other scraps in an unseen trash can.  That's where Amy should have thrown those used paper towels and the awful looking potato pancakes.  Yes, you always put peeled potatoes in cold water until you're ready to use them.  Why doesn't she know this?

No need for crying eyes from onions.  As AZC said, hold a slice of bread in your mouth.  I had problems with crying eyes until I decided to spend a little more money to buy sweet onions.  They're available all year round, coming from different areas of the country.

Why doesn't she do some of the prep work before she starts the video, such as cutting up the green beans? 

She really needs to hire someone to help her make her videos more professional looking because right now they're very amateurish.

Edited June 5, 2020 by DonnaMae

[Dustbunny]

I think Amy is a cheapskate... she won't hire anyone to help because she'd have to pay them and I'm pretty sure that she thinks she'll get enough attention from her Roloff fame to get a cooking show.

This is where Matt's view of business is superior to Amy's, you have to spend money to make money.

She has a few fantards that gush all over everything she does, buy every book she writes etc.. but it will never grow into a Martha Stewart type following because Amy always tries to scrimp and it shows... she doesn't teach you anything, in fact we wind up telling her how it should be done... she doesn't even know how to pronounce the ingredients.

Professional chefs, bakers etc. teach you the proper method and they tell you why it's done that way.... Amy doesn't know the proper method so she can't teach anyone anything.

The other thing about her is she refuses to listen and always takes offense when things are pointed out to her.

I like to learn something when I watch a cooking show... I don't want to sit there grimacing as the cook does everything ass-backwards, licking fingers, greasy hair flipping this way and that way, jewelry in the food... ugh!

 

[ginger90]

Another video:

 

 

[Irate Panda]

15 hours ago, DonnaMae said:

So many things wrong with this video.  Where do I begin?

Why does she keep repeating who she is?  And why does she act so coy and cutesy?  It almost looked like she was curtsying at the beginning.

I get she probably thinks this is branding, but it gets me every time she does it because she always seems to stumble over it or needs to think about who she is.  In the onion-stuck-to-the-face video, she’s like “Hey, hi everyone.  Amy...Amy Roloff...in Amy Roloff’s Little Kitchen in her new house.”  
 

I’m gonna start beginning each of my post with “ Hey! Hi, everyone! This is Irate.  Irate Panda.  Irate Panda in Primetimer Forum.  Irate Panda in Primetimer Forum, that’s on my iPad.  Irate Panda on Primetimer Forum, that’s on my iPad, which is located in my house.“

Edited June 6, 2020 by Irate Panda

[DonnaMae]

Anyone notice is this video clip that Felix is licking her toes? 😏

[Fostersmom]

3 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Another video:

 

 

I watched the first 2 minutes and she didn’t even know the name of the book she was talking about!

[BradandJanet]

I cringed seeing her chop that the onion right next to the bowl of strawberries and the mixer I assume was beating cream into butter. Nothing brightens the flavor of a Strawberry Whipped Cream Cheeze Cake Short Cake like pieces of raw onion.  

It looks like she's using a ceramic knives. Good luck with the sharpening. No professional cook I know uses them. 

Jeremy is probably used to Amy's cooking, but the sad potato pancakes, thick barbecue sauce, and the giant Whatever Cake don't look like foods that will sit well on Audrey's thigh gap. 

[floridamom]

Oh my, look at the mess on the counter behind her in this other 26 minute video. Didn't she just move in to that house? A mess already? Poor Chris.

[AZChristian]

2 hours ago, floridamom said:

Oh my, look at the mess on the counter behind her in this other 26 minute video. Didn't she just move in to that house? A mess already? Poor Chris.

"Healing Begins in the Kitchen" unless your mother does not follow basic hygiene practices while cooking.  At which point, you'd need to read "Food Poisoning Begins in the Kitchen."

So in this video we see where the sink is in the corner, with what appears to be plenty of room on the countertop next to the sink.  So WHY are the paper towels at least 6 feet away on the other side of the stove?  If she doesn't understand basic common sense practices, why would I assume she knows ANYTHING about cooking?  

Edited June 6, 2020 by AZChristian

[Irate Panda]

She screwed up the title of the book and the husband’s name, and she’s only 20 seconds into the video.  Just start over.  What is she making with the yolks? Kem Ba-lay!  I wonder if he’s friends with Art Vandelay.

 

*Yes, I exaggerated the crème brûlée, but I did have to rewind it to understand what she said.

Edited June 6, 2020 by Irate Panda

[PradaKitty]

It sounded like crumb blay to me. 

[Irate Panda]

I tried to watch this, but couldn’t get through it, and that’s saying something considering all the other time I’ve wasted on her videos.  I only watched about 8-10 minutes of it.  The two guests seemed fine.  I don’t know if they got better or worse during the video, but they both seemed way more comfortable doing this “vir-chul” cooking than Amy.  Amy stares blankly into the camera shredding cheese, but not before telling us food is necessary.  Good to know because I was feeling really guilty about eating every day.

Now, while we found out that food is necessary, the type is apparently not at all important, since Amy didn’t bother to get the actual ingredients called for in the recipe.  *sigh* 

She’s trying to shred cheese, “interviewing” Dr. Misner, fumbling with the book to remember the name of the item she is preparing, doing something with the stove. If this is any indication, I can’t wait for this essential workers “E-gather”.

 

*She did precut the onions, so I’ll give her two points for that.

[LucyEth]

Irate Panda, I couldn't get through it either lasted about 10 mins and then just clicked it off.

[ginger90]

9 pictures: 

 

 

[AZChristian]

I have a thought about Amy's ownership of HER house. 

I don't know whether Chris is listed as a co-owner, but I tend to doubt it.  They have made it very clear that Chris will move into "Amy's house" at some point, before their marriage.

I suspect Amy doesn't want anyone else's name on the title, because she wants this house to run by HER rules.  If she wants it to devolve into the pig sty that the Roloff Farms main house became, she doesn't want anyone else to have any legal right to say, "This is my house, too.  I keep my stuff neat; please keep your stuff tidy as well."  As much as she resented Matt's requests and attempts to have their marital home tidy, I don't think she's going to allow another man feel he has the right to offer input on how the home should be maintained.

I still have a gut feeling that there will never be an Amy/Chris wedding.  When you're in your 50s, you don't postpone a wedding for over a year because you have so much else to do.  What could be a higher priority than marrying a person you supposedly love more than anything?  You can go to the courthouse or have a small affair at your local church.  That won't take much planning . . . if the MARRIAGE is a priority, not just just a WEDDING.  (Looking for another season of LPBW, Amy?)

 

[Scarlett45]

1 hour ago, AZChristian said:

That won't take much planning . . . if the MARRIAGE is a priority, not just just a WEDDING.  (Looking for another season of LPBW, Amy?)

I agree that a wedding would be scheduled around LPBW, as that’s the first priority not the marriage. I don’t doubt she has real feelings for Chris or anything like that, but getting good footage for the season is what’s important to her. 

[LucyEth]

It is definitely all about the wedding.  She is going to have Randy from "Say Yes to the Dress" make her a gown.  No doubt there will be several specials surrounding this wedding and it will be featured on the show IMO, after all the show is her paycheck.   Chris is almost 60, this BS about he has never been married before is just a  ridiculous excuse for a dog and pony show.

[Joan of Argh]

4 hours ago, AZChristian said:

I have a thought about Amy's ownership of HER house. 

I don't know whether Chris is listed as a co-owner, but I tend to doubt it.  They have made it very clear that Chris will move into "Amy's house" at some point, before their marriage.

I suspect Amy doesn't want anyone else's name on the title, because she wants this house to run by HER rules.  If she wants it to devolve into the pig sty that the Roloff Farms main house became, she doesn't want anyone else to have any legal right to say, "This is my house, too.  I keep my stuff neat; please keep your stuff tidy as well."  As much as she resented Matt's requests and attempts to have their marital home tidy, I don't think she's going to allow another man feel he has the right to offer input on how the home should be maintained.

I still have a gut feeling that there will never be an Amy/Chris wedding.  When you're in your 50s, you don't postpone a wedding for over a year because you have so much else to do.  What could be a higher priority than marrying a person you supposedly love more than anything?  You can go to the courthouse or have a small affair at your local church.  That won't take much planning . . . if the MARRIAGE is a priority, not just just a WEDDING.  (Looking for another season of LPBW, Amy?)

 

I think you hit the nail on the head.

This whole thing about postponing the wedding because they're too busy or now the latest "excuse" that all the venues are booked blah, blah is a load of BS.

Amy presents herself as a very religious person and she always said that she doesn't approve of people living together outside of marriage so why not get married in a simple ceremony and then have a more elaborate wedding later on when they aren't so busy?

She'd rather be a hypocrite and go against her long held belief that living together outside of marriage is a sin and just live with Chris.... and she justifies it by saying that they're formally engaged so it's okay. 🙄

She's a convenient Christian and it's all about "do as I say... not as I do"

I think her kids are slightly pissed about her living with Chris because she always told them that living together was a sin and not acceptable....a few months ago Jer and Auj had an episode on their podcast about this very subject and how it was a sin, no exceptions.

On another note did anyone else catch it when she said that the reason Chris was at his house and she was alone is because he has a pet fish and he needed to be home to look after it.... Give me a break! 😂

We've had plenty of fish over the years and they're just fine overnight or even longer if you add a feeder block to their tank, no need to stay home and babysit. 🐠 

[AZChristian]

4 minutes ago, Joan of Argh said:

On another note did anyone else catch it when she said that the reason Chris was at his house and she was alone is because he has a pet fish and he needed to be home to look after it.... Give me a break!

I've become convinced from watching Amy's cooking videos that the delusion is strong with this one . . . she believes that we believe whatever she says. 

She thinks we believe she's a great cook, when even those of us who are very basic cooks (like me) can pick out easily all of her kitchen missteps. 

She thinks we believe that a grown man has to go home to take care of a FISH?  Is it not in a bowl or tank?  Can it not be moved?  Does he have to take it out for walks a couple of times a day?

She thinks that just because SHE says that living together without marriage is okay, then everyone believes that she is not going against all of her Christian professions of faith and following the Bible.

Honestly, Christian hypocrites do more harm to organized religion than the devil ever did.  

[ginger90]

4 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

I agree that a wedding would be scheduled around LPBW, as that’s the first priority not the marriage. I don’t doubt she has real feelings for Chris or anything like that, but getting good footage for the season is what’s important to her. 

I agree. 

If Amy didn’t postpone the wedding (there was never an original date announced) it’s very likely it wouldn’t be filmed. She has to have the dress hunt, which also wouldn’t have been filmed.

Amy needs an enema.

[LucyEth]

2 hours ago, Joan of Argh said:

On another note did anyone else catch it when she said that the reason Chris was at his house and she was alone is because he has a pet fish and he needed to be home to look after it.... Give me a break! 😂

🤣

1 hour ago, AZChristian said:

She thinks we believe that a grown man has to go home to take care of a FISH?  Is it not in a bowl or tank?  Can it not be moved?  Does he have to take it out for walks a couple of times a day?

🤣

Just a thought, if she feels strongly about not living together before marriage could they have gotten legally married or at least gotten the license (I think once you have the license you are legally married) and are saving a ceremony and reception for the show?

[ginger90]

Peanut butter and chocolate, what a concept. 🤦‍♀️
 

I wonder what her thought process was, choosing what seems to be the book, The Last Policeman, to rest the plate on.

[druzy]

On 6/5/2020 at 12:25 AM, Dustbunny said:

 

Does she think she is tricking us into believing she can cook? She needs to edit her videos. I only watched 5 minutes and she coughed twice. Also, that piece of plastic was bothering me.

[Absolom]

38 minutes ago, LucyEth said:

least gotten the license (I think once you have the license you are legally married) and are saving a ceremony and reception for the show?

No, you aren't married when you get the license.  It has to be completed and filed.  As my daughter laughed, the minister had completed the form and they had signed before they had the ceremony.  She was going we can skip the ceremony now we're actually married.  The marriage won't be officially recorded until the form is filed as friends of mine discovered when they went to get a copy.  Their friend who was the officiant failed to file it timely so they were informed they weren't legally married.   A new license and immediate courthouse "wedding" ensued.

[chenoa333]

Sorry Amy, but your homemade BBQ sauce sounds gross.....ketchup and vinegar. No thanks.

[ginger90]

9 pictures:

 

 

[ginger90]

Video:

warning, contains finger licking, hair touching, and Amy will never be asked to endorse Kitchen Aid mixers.....

 

 

[LucyEth]

Looks like poor Molly and her husband had to suffer through one of Amy's crappy soups.

[Dustbunny]

Chris Marek Reveals Why it Was a ‘Horrible Experience’ Proposing to Amy Roloff

 

Just watched this interview and in it Amy says she wants Ember to be her flower girl and Jackson to be the ring bearer.

It will be an outdoor ceremony.

[ginger90]

16 minutes ago, Dustbunny said:

Chris Marek Reveals Why it Was a ‘Horrible Experience’ Proposing to Amy Roloff

 

Just watched this interview and in it Amy says she wants Ember to be her flower girl and Jackson to be the ring bearer.

It will be an outdoor ceremony.

In what year?

[ginger90]

21 minutes ago, Dustbunny said:

Amy says she wants Ember to be her flower girl and Jackson to be the ring bearer.

Typical Amy says this in an interview, but hasn’t discussed it with their parents. Actually she said Audrey and Tori, and didn’t mention her sons. 🤷🏼‍♀️

[AZChristian]

2 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

In what year?

At the rate they're going, Ember can be the matron of honor and Jackson can be the best man.

Poor Bode and Lilah will be pouring punch and managing the guest book.  

Never.Gonna.Happen.

BTW, we watched the strawberry shortcake cake video.  Can't figure out why Amy cares about learning to pronounce "gateau."  Maybe she should work on "rhubar."

Forgot to count the finger licks and the hair pushing while cooking.  My favorite was getting butter on her finger and then pushing her hair back with that same finger.

[Fostersmom]

1 hour ago, ginger90 said:

Video:

warning, contains finger licking, hair touching, and Amy will never be asked to endorse Kitchen Aid mixers.....

 

 

Who filmed this hot mess? She walks out of the frame repeatedly and half the time it’s shots of nothing.

Lots of finger licking and super phony enthusiasm. I’d love to know how much of her greasy hair ended up in the whipped cream mess she made after she all but stuck her head in the bowl a dozen times. Twenty minutes into the video, she bothered to get a stool.

 I was totally waiting for her to break a layer in half since she just carried them across the kitchen, tripping over a stool in the process. My personal favorites were her putting all the strawberries on the top.... and then pulling them off one at a time to scrape more frosting on to the top, and when she all but stuffed frosting up her nose to smell it.

 

[DonnaMae]

3 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Video:

warning, contains finger licking, hair touching, and Amy will never be asked to endorse Kitchen Aid mixers.....

Yes, the finger licking and then she used her licked finger to scrape off the spatula. 😝

[chenoa333]

4 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Video:

warning, contains finger licking, hair touching, and Amy will never be asked to endorse Kitchen Aid mixers.....

 

 

"And...umm, yeah..." . Great opening to your cooking instructions. A simple cake with 3 different types of cream...whipped cream, cream cheese and sour cream. Sounds complicated....said no one EVER.

I'm a really uneducated, uknowledgeable inexperienced cook. But even I can make a two layer white cake with whipped cream and strawberries. ETA: I used to make that cake for my terminally ill friend whose taste buds no longer worked due to chemo. Nevertheless, she loved my whipped cream strawberry white cake. ❤️

 

Edited June 9, 2020 by chenoa333

[Jeanne222]

She just might get a cooking show!  She's crazy in those cooking videos and some might just enjoy her lack of hygiene and expertise in the kitchen!

If momma June can get a tv show....anything is possible!

[AZChristian]

3 minutes ago, Jeanne222 said:

She just might get a cooking show!  She's crazy in those cooking videos and some might just enjoy her lack of hygiene and expertise in the kitchen!

If momma June can get a tv show....anything is possible!

I think with today's pandemic going on, lots of us have become even MORE conscientious about kitchen hygiene.  It's been almost 3 months since I ate a bite of food that wasn't prepared in my own kitchen because I'm so concerned about cooks who lick their fingers, push their hair back with their hands, etc.  

To be honest, that cake looked good; but having watched Amy put it together, I'd politely decline a slice of it if offered.

[Jeanne222]

On 6/7/2020 at 6:33 PM, ginger90 said:

Peanut butter and chocolate, what a concept. 🤦‍♀️
 

I wonder what her thought process was, choosing what seems to be the book, The Last Policeman, to rest the plate on.

Is that the putrid lemon fudge again?  My mouth goes into spasms every time I see it!   Uggg.

[AZChristian]

2 minutes ago, Jeanne222 said:

Is that the putrid lemon fudge again?  My mouth goes into spasms every time I see it!   Uggg.

I think that's chocolate fudge and peanut butter fudge.  They didn't have ANY fudge when I looked a couple of weeks ago, so they must have just gotten a new shipment in.

And regarding the lemon fudge . . . I know that Amy doesn't make any of it herself, but I just imagine her brushing her hair back out of her face, then scraping the lemon zest into her batter with the same hand as she did on her cake video.  No, THANK YOU.

[Fostersmom]

1 hour ago, Jeanne222 said:

Is that the putrid lemon fudge again?  My mouth goes into spasms every time I see it!   Uggg.

No, it's peanut butter, but I thought the color looked off too when I first saw it. 

[Irate Panda]

I guess Kitchen Aid won’t be asking to collaborate with Amy, LOL.  I think the cake itself is fine, nothing ground-breaking, but again who wants to watch her cleaning off the spatula when mixing the butter after already licking her fingers and why is she always licking them?  I mean some people are fans of the dirty crumpled paper towels in the camera shot, can we go back to that?

 I can’t even imagine the dinner conversation with Audrey, Jeremy, Amy and I’m guessing Chris.  I picture it as Jeremy giving Amy and Chris marriage advice, since he’s an expert now.  It’s not easy being married 38 minutes.  Audrey excusing herself constantly because she has to go post about how sore her boobs are.  Amy totally “fustrated” because nobody is trashing Matt, and Chris thinking to himself, “How long has this dinner been?  3 hours?  Gotta definitely be 3.  It’ll be over soon, how long does dinner last?  Couple of hours, then maybe another hour or two for conversation?  It’ll be over soon.  You almost made it. “  He looks down at his watch and the dinner has lasted 12 minutes thus far.  Chris slumps down in his chair, zones out, and goes to his “happy place”.

 

Edited June 10, 2020 by Irate Panda

[chenoa333]

13 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

If momma June can get a tv show....anything is possible!

At least Mama June knows she's not getting her own TV show because she thinks she can cook! Lol