Dating Around - General Discussion

[starri]

Now in Netflix.

And Lex should totally have picked Brad.

[awaken]

I was confused by Gurkhi’s ending. Were they indicating that she chose no one?  The guy who harangued her about her marriage was an ass. 

[starri]

She apparently did elect not to keep trying to make a love connection with anyone, although she's apparently interacting with everyone except Justin on social media.

Lex and Cory didn't last.

Leonard and Dianna may have.

[EverettO]

I’m bothered by the fact that the “star” of each episode has to wear the exact same outfit for 5 different dates... let’s hope there’s laundry time between dates! 

[biakbiak]

On 2/24/2019 at 5:29 AM, starri said:

She apparently did elect not to keep trying to make a love connection with anyone, although she's apparently interacting with everyone except Justin on social media.

Lex and Cory didn't last.

Leonard and Dianna may have.

Spoiler

No one from the show lasted in a romantic relationship.

5 hours ago, EverettO said:

I’m bothered by the fact that the “star” of each episode has to wear the exact same outfit for 5 different dates... let’s hope there’s laundry time between dates! 

The creator was on The Ringer’s Bachelor Party podcast and mentioned they did that so there would be some continuity and not be as jarring when they were flipping between dates and that the show paid for the dry cleaning.

I only watched the first ep and was turned off because I thought The Guy was as a douche and most of the women not that interesting. But after listening to him on the podcast and Juliet Litman loving it I will probably watch the other episodes.

He said they hadn’t heard about season 2 but that Netflix was really happy and that he wanted to switch locations including maybe international locations and mentioned Tokyo, London, and Madrid was possibilities.

Edited February 26, 2019 by biakbiak

[numbnut]

I've only seen the Gurki ep. Justin. Yikes. Such an entitled douche. Who loudly berates a first date about their life choices? He actually thinks he represents New Yorkers 🙄 but we eat guys like this for breakfast. Manny was a sweetheart but Gurki wasn't into it. Gurki and Jay seemed to have nice chemistry.

Edited February 27, 2019 by numbnut

[AnnaBaptist]

It was hard to get through the first episode because one of the dates kept purposely smacking her lips while eating because she said "it makes the food taste better". No, you eejit, it makes you look like you didn't learn any manners. So gross.

[awaken]

4 hours ago, AnnaBaptist said:

It was hard to get through the first episode because one of the dates kept purposely smacking her lips while eating because she said "it makes the food taste better". No, you eejit, it makes you look like you didn't learn any manners. So gross.

She was bizarre. I think she was going for earthy and quirky but it backfired on her. And her lips, omg!  Full of fillers. 

[numbnut]

On 3/1/2019 at 4:00 PM, AnnaBaptist said:

It was hard to get through the first episode because one of the dates kept purposely smacking her lips while eating because she said "it makes the food taste better". No, you eejit, it makes you look like you didn't learn any manners. So gross.

I finally watched the rest of the eps, and she definitely was a (bad) highlight. I think she defensively points out her flaws ("I want to be fat") before her dates beat her to it. Another dude (the one with the curly mustache) was eating like he hadn't had a meal in a week.

[Racj82]

I was of two minds about the white female main dater. She seems like a good person and I was hopeful for her while I wouldn't date her in a million years. She just pushes a lot buttons for me. Mainly, I would be on constant eggshells not sure if I'm going to step on a joke or phrase that will trigger her. It's not that I'm out here making offensive jokes or what not but she just hits me as the type that has a ton of no no's and that would get tired after a while.

Like I get the hate towards women and being told to relax. But, I was literally thinking the way the guy was in the moment. I think he was trying to get her to reel back from a silly joke. Not belittle her or whatever. But, that was also all it took to just torpedo everything. We just wouldn't mix.

[roseslg]

On 3/4/2019 at 12:22 PM, Racj82 said:

I was of two minds about the white female main dater. She seems like a good person and I was hopeful for her while I wouldn't date her in a million years. She just pushes a lot buttons for me. Mainly, I would be on constant eggshells not sure if I'm going to step on a joke or phrase that will trigger her. It's not that I'm out here making offensive jokes or what not but she just hits me as the type that has a ton of no no's and that would get tired after a while.

Like I get the hate towards women and being told to relax. But, I was literally thinking the way the guy was in the moment. I think he was trying to get her to reel back from a silly joke. Not belittle her or whatever. But, that was also all it took to just torpedo everything. We just wouldn't mix.

She was a lot to deal with.  Manic pixie fairy girl.    90% of the people were so annoying and seemed to fit all these stereotypes.  My favorite episode was with Lenny.   They all seemed more real.   

[AnnaBaptist]

On 3/7/2019 at 10:05 PM, roseslg said:

She was a lot to deal with.  Manic pixie fairy girl.    90% of the people were so annoying and seemed to fit all these stereotypes.  My favorite episode was with Lenny.   They all seemed more real.   

Perhaps it is because I am closer in age to Leonard than to the others, but I liked his episode the most. Leonard and I are at the age where we have seen it all and have zero tolerance for b.s. We like to keep it honest and don't get easily offended if someone thinks it is not working out and wishes to call it a night. I really felt his pain when the date who kept checking her phone (Eileen?) was clearly not a match, yet she couldn't take the hint and was a bit fragile and thin-skinned. I don't blame Leonard one bit when he said, "I hate this shit," after her date, I enjoyed his straightforward conversation.

Because of this viewpoint, I liked Lex's episode the least. I thought everyone was trying too hard to say the "right" thing; snappy comments seemed to be more important than getting to know one another. It just seemed very contrived and not enjoyable.

[anniebird]

Sara is that high-maintenance girl who always think she's cuter than she actually is but I was glad she dumped the strip club guy with all the double entendres. 

And I was so glad Leonard picked Diana - they both seemed like very nice people

[aradia22]

LUKE: Starting the episode I thought... is he gay? (I assume most guys are gay, especially in NY and if they look somewhat presentable. This is almost meaningless.) But then he started talking and I was like... nope, definitely straight. Boring. He's very boring. I've watched dating stuff before and maybe those people were just a little more camera ready. Luke was very... normal. I guess it's good that he's letting his dates talk but he was contributing so little to those conversations. Just the blandest of reactions. I found him slightly suspicious. Like is he a finance bro fuckboy just being on his best behavior for the cameras? Or is he the kind of person who is pretty enough early enough in life to not have to develop much of a personality? Or maybe he was just nervous about being filmed at all? Maybe he's shy at first? He did seem to warm up with some of the women more later on. I don't know. But it was so boring to watch.

Loud eater made me laugh if only because she came across like a future RHONJ or an extra from one of those movies full of Italian American stereotypes.

Estee Lauder/I love dancing was an interesting date because they didn't really click and even though they weren't open about it, I could sense that they'd both realized that early on. Like, talking about how you can't get a date is almost as bad as just talking about your exes. There was potential for the conversation to go anywhere if they didn't really care so that kept me engaged.

They kept it together but I think there might have been a language barrier with Colombia/previously married. I vaguely remember hearing somewhere that they found some people like off the street or whatever instead of doing the big casting calls that get wannabe actors or the pool of people who want to be on reality tv. These felt like real blind dates where maybe you have nothing in common.

I feel like he had the best chemistry with blond/went to college in Florida and brunette/works in the food industry. Based on the background info, I'd assume he'd like the blond better but the shallow part of me wonders if she's pretty enough for him.

The end of the dates were insanity. Painfully, hilariously awkward. Was production involved? NJ going in for the makeout (I definitely noticed one of Luke's hands wandering). Colombia deciding they should salsa dance. Respect to the girl who I knew wasn't feeling him from the beginning being super upfront about that. Second location, I knew he liked the blond one.

To borrow a phrase from The Bachelor, I feel like I'm watching and enjoying this show for the wrong reasons.

[Alexander Pope]

I was really traumatized by the guy who yelled at Gurki about her marriage.  That was way too real for me.  And the ending was like a consumerist fantasy of Mary Tyler Moore in Soho.  I found it creepy.

[Irritable]

I was most surprised to see Gurki going into a Vera Bradley store.  She does not look the type to dig those products.  Honestly, I'm surprised there is a VB store in NY at all, I thought she catered to suburban soccer moms and suburban teen girls almost exclusively.

I was able to correctly guess who the person chose for their second date every time, so that was fun for me.  Leonard's story was most interesting for me, maybe because I am closer to his age than the young ones, or maybe because the women said things like, "I like to take my teeth out by 8 pm" and "make it a double".  The woman he chose was so lovely, and her voice had me hypnotized.  I wish it had worked out for them.  And I wish she was my friend that I could meet up for coffee and shopping, or whatever.  She was such an interesting, soothing person.
 

I did not enjoy the first guy at all, Luke I think his name was?  He was so basic, and all the witty banter came from his dates.  The food smacking woman was insufferable to me because I have misophonia and cannot tolerate eating sounds at all, I genuinely want to commit murder when I hear those noises.  

Mila was so beautiful, and seems like a huge catch.  I liked her choice for Date 2 the best, also, and am sorry they didn't work out, but also I kind of could see why they wouldn't work as a serious couple.

What I've learned the most from all these dating shows is that I am SO THANKFUL to be married.  If I had to deal with the dating world again, I would absolutely just become a hermit cat lady and call it done. 

[CarobCake]

On 12/24/2019 at 6:10 PM, Alexander Pope said:

I was really traumatized by the guy who yelled at Gurki about her marriage.  That was way too real for me.  And the ending was like a consumerist fantasy of Mary Tyler Moore in Soho.  I found it creepy.

OMG, yes, I came here just to talk about that. She was totally shaken, and I would've been as well. WTF? What the hell was he doing? Trying to see how much of a pushover she would be? The guy had the gall to be actually surprised when she said that they were not going to see each other again.

[LakeGal]

Season two is on.  They are in New Orleans.  I have watched about half the season.  The first guy kept talking about his mother.  The second guy was just very odd.  

[EdnasEdibles]

The odd guy was weird but slightly endearing. I mean, I wouldn’t want to date him because of the awkwardness but I was glad he found someone. 
 

I felt so bad for him when the lady was like “I don’t feel a romantic connection” - I’ve gotten that before and you always think you’d prefer that to ghosting but it hurts just as bad. Rejection just hurts.

My least favorite person was the make-up artist in the gold dress who thought she was way more deep than she actually us and was drunk on all of her dates. 🙄

[HerkyJerky]

First of all, let me say that Ben had a lot more success than I thought he would.  With all of his stammering and affectations, I would have given him a hard pass, but some of the women seemed into him except for the one who "friend-zoned"him.

The college student that went to the university he taught at just seem confused by the whole, "Let me check with HR and I'll get back to you".

The model (?) seemed into him (they even exchanged #'s) but I think she was just drunk.

The one who seemed most into him was the black woman with kids.  They were really vibing until the end when he blew it.  I'm sure she was thinking, "Just be a man and kiss me!"

Last season, we had Gurki who was shown shopping seemingly happy that she picked nobody.  So, I was curious as to how the show was going to show that he called everybody and NOBODY wanted to go on a 2nd date with him, but thank God for radio podcast girl.  She seemed really sweet.

 

[EdnasEdibles]

I was annoyed this year that there were no older daters. Last year we had at least one older guy going on dates. 

[roseslg]

The Poly guy seemed like a creep.   Great speaking voice though. I cringed so hard during Ben's dates.  He was the most awkward.  I hope he finds his lobster.

[aradia22]

Season 2... I would not have watched if a podcast I listen to wasn't covering this season.

I'm two episodes in and I feel like I'm losing my mind. I do not have a big reaction to most shows. But I have been clapping, screaming, verbalizing my reactions... I'm worried about disturbing my neighbors. But to me, this show is true madness. The second hand cringe is real and it is almost unbearable.

I cannot remember the names of the daters (meaning whoever isn't the main person) so I will speak in generalities. The intros are interesting. Basically, all his friends called Justin a fuckboi. And then he acted like one. Did I notice that he only wanted to get the phone numbers of the white girls... and not the one brunette who looked a little nerdier? Yup. It was interesting how race kept coming up. In some ways I think it was both more awkward and less awkward with the Vietnamese girl. But I also think if that's what he wanted, he could find it himself. Also, I think it's a bit of guy thing. I have never wanted to ask a guy I've gone on a date with if he's dated outside of his race.

All of his friends basically called Ben a sensitive dork. And he was a sensitive dork. But he did win me over during the episode. At first the pitch of his voice and the stammer and basically his eager puppy energy were a little offputting, as much as I understood them. But he ended up being genuinely sweet and willing to put himself out there. It was wild to watch but I appreciate him being concerned about dating a student and sending her home early. How many guys would do that... even knowing they were being filmed for a TV show? I liked that he asked permission to kiss the women. When he gave them compliments, they felt genuine and thoughtful and not like the offhand fuckboy nonsense Justin was doing.

This show is both very artificial and too real and it's making me crazy dealing with the second hand embarrassment. 

[aradia22]

S2E3 Yaass... Deva serving gorgeous, plus-size bisexual queen energy.

For someone in entertainment, this actually felt more authentic and less cringey to me than the other episodes. Part of that might be that what I see as authenticity is actually charisma and an ability to easily talk with people... which is not something most laypeople are actually capable of.

The guy who only dates bisexual women really let his crazy unfold throughout the episode but "no doubt" was the one who really made me crazy. That would get so annoying. Rueben really thought he was a player and Deva was not fooled by any of his moves. She was very cute with the blond artist girl. 

I'm so curious about the order of the dates. I feel like the guys were open to anyone but given how she connected so much more Maria than anyone else, I wonder where she came in the date order. I respect Deva not leading anyone else on. 

[aradia22]

S2E4 Heather is very pretty. As soon as she started talking, I knew who she was. She's definitely... the kind of girl who plays into gendered stereotypes. She giggles and flatters guys in a very... particular way.

Something is wrong with me. I was immediately attracted to Truman and then after everything he said I was like... nope. I need to be less attracted to conservative and/or misogynistic finance bros. Not saying that he's one, but some combination of those traits is often checked with the guys I am physically attracted to, at least in the NYC dating pool.

I did not like the baby-faced guy. 

It wasn't a stray cat. It had a collar. 

I really wanted her to pick Ernesto. I'm so glad she did!

[aradia22]

Brandon's episode was unbearably boring. For most of the episode, he only seemed to have chemistry with people named Ronald. It was the only interaction where there was some tension and flirting and not just the dullest small talk. Towards the end, he was flirtier and kissing and touching more of the guys but I was still surprised that he chose Justin and not Ronald.

I thought Demi had good chemistry with Allan. They seemed to really vibe. Also, his accent speaking Spanish was incredibly hot.

Trevor was just perfect. I kept trying to figure out what was wrong with him. A gorgeous doctor with an adorable pet hedgehog?

Red suit was almost immediately an "absolutely not." Britton (floral shirt) was also a no but he didn't give me a weird vibe. He was just clearly a no. 

Zach won me over by the end. Even though they connected on so many things... board games, dancing, etc. I still wasn't sure if she'd pick him over Allan. 

Overall, it was a weirdly ordered season. I think I would have put Deva's episode last. Maybe Heather's but Deva's was slightly better. I would have broken up the first two episodes and saved one for later so the end of the season didn't feel like such a lull.

[aradia22]

Quote

The odd guy was weird but slightly endearing. I mean, I wouldn’t want to date him because of the awkwardness but I was glad he found someone. 

Same. When red hair rejected him, I figured he would go for the most basic remaining woman and he did. The picnic sounded cute. He needs someone with wholesome energy.

Quote

The model (?) seemed into him (they even exchanged #'s) but I think she was just drunk.

My interpretation was that she didn't want to look bad on camera. 

[aradia22]

Quote

I was confused by Gurkhi’s ending. Were they indicating that she chose no one?  The guy who harangued her about her marriage was an ass. 

I went back and watched her episode. I'm torn how I feel about how she went about the experience. Yes, that guy was a lunatic. But he was weirdly combative and borderline offensive early on. And yet she kept him through to the second location and let the Hispanic guy and black guy go home? *insert side eye gif here*

[roseslg]

I think also when it gets later in the evening, people tend to get very handsy and kissy, sometimes regardless of who they are with.  I think with Deva she probably met Maria earlier on and then was reluctant to be kissed by others.  I don't blame her.  I know the object of the show is dating around, but I have never been able to do so.  

[ExMathMajor]

If I recall correctly, last season the daters rarely chose the people you'd think were the obvious choices. Or maybe it was just me being a lousy judge of character...anyway, this season I was pleasantly surprised: I just knew that Deva wasn't going to choose Maria (?) because they were getting along too well.

I was also surprised that Brandon chose Justin. The show psyched me out though...with Justin taking a new job in Austin, I figured we weren't going to see him again.

Also, as an older woman, I too was sorry they didn't pick an older dater this season. It's ironic that in my 20s I was a size 6 walking ball of insecurities, but in my 50s I'm...not. 🙂

[marny]

I’m sure he’s a lovely person, but the Ben episode was the cringiest 30 minutes of tv I’ve seen in a very long time. I was practically in the fetal position watching it the whole time. 

Edited June 26, 2020 by marny
Typo

[HerkyJerky]

On 6/17/2020 at 10:33 PM, aradia22 said:

S2E4 Heather is very pretty. As soon as she started talking, I knew who she was. She's definitely... the kind of girl who plays into gendered stereotypes. She giggles and flatters guys in a very... particular way.

Some guys may be attracted to that but me, no way!  And when she gave Truman the brush off, OMG!  She could have just said, "You seem like a nice guy but you like to hunt and I'm an animal lover, so..." but she had to say, "I don't think you would get my arty side.  I don't think we would have any intelligent conversations".  If it wasn't for the camera, I was hoping he would say, "F U, bitch, I said I liked to hunt.  I didn't say I was stupid!"

I guess it's my own fault for watching this episode directly after watching Demi's episode.  Now, SHE was a classy, real, authentic woman!

[topanga]

On 6/13/2020 at 4:10 AM, HerkyJerky said:

First of all, let me say that Ben had a lot more success than I thought he would.  With all of his stammering and affectations, I would have given him a hard pass, but some of the women seemed into him except for the one who "friend-zoned"him

I agree. As a woman in her 40s, I wouldn't mind dating someone with Ben's awkwardness. He was funny and charming once he got his words out. He's like a poor-man's Quentin Tarantino, except Tarantino is a millionaire and a pretty good writer. 

But as a woman in her 20s or early 30s, I would have written him off as 'too weird.' Young people are just dumb.  was, anyway. 

Edited July 9, 2020 by topanga

[Kiss my mutt]

I ended up really liking this show though I almost stopped watching after Justin. He was a bit “on” for my taste, very image conscious and seemed super impressed with himself. Definitely anything for tall, blonde girls. 
 

Now, thank god for Ben, though I was watching through the cracks of my fingers but I’m really happy that all the women were pretty patient and friendly at least. I liked the single mom the most, but the writer was very nice and had a very open face that I liked. I’d like how he seemed to really listen to each person and found interesting things to ask to keep the conversation going. I wonder if the stammering is pronounced more because he was being filmed and if the women would have been willing to continue the dates if they weren’t, but I’m glad the one he picked seemed happy to spend the day with him. 
 

Deva is my queena. I could just listen to her speak all day. She was enchanting and mesmerizing. I can see why both men and women are attracted to her. She was really good about not leading them on and being gentle about it. That one poly guy gave me the creeps right off the bat especially when  he said something about his ex “getting out of hand”. He sounded like he wanted a harem. Gross. She and Laura had great chemistry. Just lovely to watch. Rueben seems like he’d be fun to hang out with as a friend. The “no doubt” utterances were a bit excessive though. 
 

Heather was so annoying. Very pretty, but her voice was just awful and I cringed when she started speaking. She chose the right guy I thought in the end but I was surprised by how easily she handed out the compliments but she sounded like cocktail waitress, with the “hiya handsome” stuff. She did not handle Truman well at all, trying to put it on him as to why she wasn’t interested but I honestly think he was relieved. I know I would have been. 
That’s as far as I’ve gotten and I didn’t realize there was an earlier season so I’ll have to go back at watch that. It definitely felt more authentic than a lot of other dating shows. 
I have to say, getting a taste of that NOLA vibe was making me want to up and move.