Paradise Hotel (US) - General Discussion

[Thomas Crown]

On 5/16/2019 at 11:47 AM, PamelaMaeSnap said:

The only thing more epic than watching that season was following the thread on TWoP (apologies to Glark, Sars, Miss Alli and company who had to rein a few folks in). Who can forget Periwinkle's sending roses to Charla. That thread and those from the Bachelor/ette and Showbiz Moms and Dads kept our mods very very busy. And, on my end at least, created more than one cleanup on aisle desk-chair. (I believe I STILL have Glark's "phone call of doom" transcript saved). 

I wish I was around TWoP to follow back then because the original season of PH was amazing and fun to talk about. Yes the producers seem to make up the rules as they went along to protect Dave, Charla and the other 2 in the 4 member alliance, but I felt most of the drama that aired between the cast was organic. A lot of the cast seem to really despise each other! Dave vs Toni hating on each other every episode, Zack coming back and making threats to harm people outside the show, and then there was Charla who pulled the ultimate heel move at the end.  So much drama and still a very satisfying season.  

As for this new season.... I've been pleasantly surprised so far except for the host who's just awful.  Bachelor in Paradise should take notes on Paradise Hotel is doing things. 

[kita]

I joined the forum just because you guys were cracking me up with your comments. Special shoutout to "her face has been shot up more than Ye Olde Saloon!" 😂😂

I think the ping pong table they have set up is very symbolic of how everyone on this show is constantly back and forth.

Mari be like, "I keep getting the door slammed in my face!" just like the ground slammed her head when she fell out of the chair. She is very happy to believe anything that anyone tells her, though.

[OnceSane]

1 hour ago, kita said:

Mari be like, "I keep getting the door slammed in my face!" just like the ground slammed her head when she fell out of the chair. She is very happy to believe anything that anyone tells her, though.

Mari wants so much to be wanted that she's ignoring the truth in front of her.  If any of them had any awareness of anything except mirrors and cameras, they'd realize everyone's body language gives them away when they lie.  

I am looking forward to more producer shenanigans to mess with the not-so-fabulous foursome.

[PamelaMaeSnap]

On 5/17/2019 at 10:28 AM, LakeGal said:

I hope the ex girlfriend showing up causes some trouble.

Ditto if ONLY to smack down that insufferable five-headed Roseanna, whose girls should be registered as lethal weapons (does she think they look good or is there a lawsuit in progress against that cosmetic surgeon?) 

[RealReality]

1 hour ago, OnceSane said:

Mari wants so much to be wanted that she's ignoring the truth in front of her.  If any of them had any awareness of anything except mirrors and cameras, they'd realize everyone's body language gives them away when they lie.  

I am looking forward to more producer shenanigans to mess with the not-so-fabulous foursome.

YASS please to producer shenanigans!

Tyler's ex seems messy as hell and I'm here for it!

1 hour ago, OnceSane said:

Mari wants so much to be wanted that she's ignoring the truth in front of her.  If any of them had any awareness of anything except mirrors and cameras, they'd realize everyone's body language gives them away when they lie.  

I am looking forward to more producer shenanigans to mess with the not-so-fabulous foursome.

I also think that Mari is playing checkers and everyone else is playing....Chinese checkers at least.

[OnceSane]

1 hour ago, RealReality said:

I also think that Mari is playing checkers and everyone else is playing....Chinese checkers at least.

Very true.  Maybe Carlos was right when he said she's too emotional for the gameplay necessary to make it to the end.  Doesn't excuse him trying to use her, but it will explain his (probable) immediate hookup with one of the new ladies.  If they go for short dudes.

And if this reboot/relaunch gets a second season, I'm gonna need them to get a new host.  KC is awful: she can't read a teleprompter properly, her jabs at contestants make her seem as though she has a personal vendetta against them, her voice is like nails on a chalkboard  and she's utterly without charm.

[HorrrGoodnight]

Ok so my PH viewing has been choppy and apparently I've missed some things. 

What I do know is...the tears are still a flowin'!

Mari is used to being the hot girl at home and her self esteem is taking a real hit. Come on Mari, confidence is key!! Poor Brittany "the game piece" as she calls herself can't catch a break. Pretty damn sick of Tatum and her lash/restalin/chicken fat combo of a face. Carlos is an asshole who can leave anytime now. Not sure about Jair yet. We know Bobby Ray is just a good ole Bobby Ray. 

I missed anything about an ex girlfriend and also missed Carlos and Mari doing the do. Only figured that out after he said something about taking it to the next level. As if she's not insecure enough already. 

[RealReality]

36 minutes ago, OnceSane said:

Very true.  Maybe Carlos was right when he said she's too emotional for the gameplay necessary to make it to the end.  Doesn't excuse him trying to use her, but it will explain his (probable) immediate hookup with one of the new ladies.  If they go for short dudes.

And if this reboot/relaunch gets a second season, I'm gonna need them to get a new host.  KC is awful: she can't read a teleprompter properly, her jabs at contestants make her seem as though she has a personal vendetta against them, her voice is like nails on a chalkboard  and she's utterly without charm.

If she was savvy she would have realized that Carlos had no problem breaking his alliance with deondra.  Of course this worked to marielena's advantage at the time, but as soon as that ginger came on the scene she should have jumped to him.

He was not the most handsome and he didn't seem as witty as he thought, but he seemed down to earth and he would have been grateful that she gave him the chance to stay.

[RealReality]

6 minutes ago, SlutAssBitchAssHor said:

Ok so my PH viewing has been choppy and apparently I've missed some things. 

What I do know is...the tears are still a flowin'!

Mari is used to being the hot girl at home and her self esteem is taking a real hit. Come on Mari, confidence is key!! Poor Brittany "the game piece" as she calls herself can't catch a break. Pretty damn sick of Tatum and her lash/restalin/chicken fat combo of a face. Carlos is an asshole who can leave anytime now. Not sure about Jair yet. We know Bobby Ray is just a good ole Bobby Ray. 

I missed anything about an ex girlfriend and also missed Carlos and Mari doing the do. Only figured that out after he said something about taking it to the next level. As if she's not insecure enough already. 

Can't feel sorry for Brittney, she broke her alliance for a guy that was just plain weird.  He really was suggesting that him being a shit towards her meant he really liked her? O no girl!  Also, Hans was kinda goofy looking and I'm pretty sure he wore some sort of European style slide shoes in his exit interview....oh boy.

Tatum really looks like what happens when a chicken and a muppet make a baby.

I only caught carlos/Mari sex because the voice over guy said and I quote "when you see toes, you know it's good"

Tyler's ex girlfriend is coming this week.  I normally FF through anything with KC, but I rewound to hear her introduce the man stealing hussy.  She is wearing a blue bodycon dress (because of course she is) and she immediately busted out a picture of her draped all over Tyler the night before he left. 

Messy!  I can't wait!!

[snarts]

Just read that there's only a few episodes left in the season!  Fox cut it down from 3 episodes/week to onlyThursdays due to low ratings. Season finale is something like June 6th.  So much for this being my summer jam...

[ketose]

2 hours ago, snarts said:

Just read that there's only a few episodes left in the season!  Fox cut it down from 3 episodes/week to onlyThursdays due to low ratings. Season finale is something like June 6th.  So much for this being my summer jam...

I was wondering why I couldn't find listings. Maybe Fox should have just added more episodes of The Orville.

First mistake was starting it during May sweeps. All the finales are this month. This is definitely a July / August show when the TV landscape is barren. Second, the show is just not popular. There's a reason it only airs every 5 years.

[LakeGal]

This show didn't schedule with any hope of high ratings.  Last week they went up against the premiere of The Bachelorette.  Then the finale of both Survivor and The Big Bang Theory.  

They could have at least waited till June to put this show on the air.  It was like they wanted it to fail.  

[MrsWitter]

On 5/19/2019 at 8:42 PM, snarts said:

Just read that there's only a few episodes left in the season!  Fox cut it down from 3 episodes/week to onlyThursdays due to low ratings. Season finale is something like June 6th.  So much for this being my summer jam...

I just saw this too and am bummed. I LOVED Season 1 of this show- does anyone know if it’s streaming anywhere or can be downloaded? I’m hoping to make a return to Season 1 my summer jam instead!

[RealReality]

I am very sad, I loved the idea of having this escapist nonsense four days a week!  So the next episode is Thursday?  I have to wait so long to see what attention seeking stunts Tyler's ex girlfriend pulls for camera time?  Life is so unfair!

[HorrrGoodnight]

Awwww guys let's just make the best of what little time we have left (cue melancholy, yet dramatic music).

[OnceSane]

On 5/19/2019 at 7:55 PM, ketose said:

I was wondering why I couldn't find listings. Maybe Fox should have just added more episodes of The Orville.

First mistake was starting it during May sweeps. All the finales are this month. This is definitely a July / August show when the TV landscape is barren. Second, the show is just not popular. There's a reason it only airs every 5 years.

On 5/20/2019 at 8:21 AM, LakeGal said:

This show didn't schedule with any hope of high ratings.  Last week they went up against the premiere of The Bachelorette.  Then the finale of both Survivor and The Big Bang Theory.  

They could have at least waited till June to put this show on the air.  It was like they wanted it to fail.  

Maybe they wanted to burn this off with some nostalgic views before Love Island (US) premieres (if that's still happening).

[Ms Blue Jay]

On 5/19/2019 at 8:42 PM, snarts said:

Just read that there's only a few episodes left in the season!  Fox cut it down from 3 episodes/week to onlyThursdays due to low ratings. Season finale is something like June 6th.  So much for this being my summer jam...

That's sad!  I liked how we had a little community of viewers here.  I desperately need summer shows, and I can't be the only one.  I was SO sad, and I'm very serious, when Temptation Island ended this year.  You guys should watch it if you haven't.

[ketose]

I thought the recaps would be better quality with only having to fill 2 hours of airtime. Instead, it was really disjointed.

Plus, they decided to end on a cliffhanger, so we have to wait a week to see the people who get kicked off. 

[leocadia]

I love that the announcer seems to hate Carlos almost as much as I do.

[Wandering Snark]

1 hour ago, leocadia said:

I love that the announcer seems to hate Carlos almost as much as I do.

I also want to know how/why Carlos is somehow everyone's backup plan?

As for the announcer I forgive him the accent for this week, as he was hilarious. "We're all set for a breakfast of eggs and tension."

Did the semi-ex GF have those horrible lash extensions? It looked like she had spider legs for lashes... but I can understand why she's pissed and feels like crap, I hope she checks out leaving him alone.

I also want to play poker with him because he has that clamping down on his jaw and saying nothing when he knows he's busted. Me: "So you think you have me beat here?" *he looks at the full house in his hand but doesn't say anything, just stares forward and clenches his jaw* Me: Yeah, I'm out...

I was also living for when Rosanna started going all MMA beatdown back in her romm with the girls and Tatum was all serious all of a sudden like "Yeah, don't hit me again..."

I'm a little pissed FOX gave up on this so easily. I mean c'mon you're FOX what else are you going to put in it's place? *sigh*

[mertensia]

David and Kendall calmly watching the batshittery going down and his snarking made me laugh.

the narrator's disdain for...everyone is hilarious. 

But WTF was that about "he needs to show her her place?"  

Bobby Ray trying to wrap his head around Tatum's being a genius was also hilarious.

[snarts]

At this pace no idea how they'll wrap this up with only two episodes remaining.  Plus new guys next week? 

[Ohwell]

The best thing about this show is the breakfast they serve.  Yum.

[Rebky]

3 hours ago, snarts said:

At this pace no idea how they'll wrap this up with only two episodes remaining.  Plus new guys next week? 

It makes no sense.  There is no way they can pull this off.

Tyler? My advice to you is to pick the one who won't turn into a raging bitch at the drop of a hat. Life will be so much easier. Trust me.

[LakeGal]

I really wish they would give us at least 2 episodes a week.  

I felt like I was watching Temptation Island during the Shailee/Tyler/Rosanna parts.  

I hope Carlos is playing Tyler and Rosanna.  I want him to keep Kaitlyn and boot Rosanna.  But with Carlos you never know what you will get.  

Rosanna is completely out of control.  Get Out, Come Here, Go Away, Where are You?  Tyler is controlled by her crazy actions.  

[Wandering Snark]

I loved Rosanna's "If I am flipping you the double bird it OBVIOUSLY means come talk to me!!" I've got an idea Rosanna, it's what my mom used to tell the 3 and 4 year olds she taught when they were acting out... "You need to use your words." Just in case your BF can't read your mind when you go change into black baggy sweats and flip him off then refuse to talk to him when he DOES notice *eye roll* That whole thing was redic.

[Ohwell]

Rosanna honey, you need more than big boobs to get a man to stay with you. 

[HorrrGoodnight]

Sick of Rosanna and her wing tip sharpie eye liner. Tyler ignores the new girls, she has a problem. Tyler socializes with the new girls, he's dead.

Sick of Tatum and her whining spoiled lip injections

Carlos continues to ba an asshat

The new girls are super cute!!!! Too bad Nicole had to go.

I want to like Mari so bad but she needs to toughen up. 

Bobby Ray has to say everything "fancy" like instead of saying "What did yall talk about?" He asks Tyler what range of topics were discussed

The Ex!! Way to bring the drrrrama. Shes still in love with Tyler but he has so much in common with Ro,  they both like.... Well thats irrelevant. 😂

It's like attack of the lashes with these girls geez. 

[kita]

Thanks a lot, Nicole, for pulling the, "cash me outside!" nonsense. You just made us all dumber.

Why are Brittany and Jair still hanging out? They don't even like each other. And Tatum and Bobby won't be making any science fair volcanoes because the two of them have not one iota of chemistry. Mariaelena was most entertaining when she was falling over. Otherwise she's no fun.

Katilin's yellow sunglasses were SHARP.

What show did Shailee think Tyler was going on when he left: Jeopardy? (Not with that haircut, honey.) And I've concluded that neither Shailee nor Rosanna care about Tyler, or else one of them would REMIND HIM TO PUT SUNSCREEN UNDER HIS EYES!!! That looks like it hurts!

[ketose]

19 hours ago, Wandering Snark said:

I also want to know how/why Carlos is somehow everyone's backup plan?

As for the announcer I forgive him the accent for this week, as he was hilarious. "We're all set for a breakfast of eggs and tension."

Did the semi-ex GF have those horrible lash extensions? It looked like she had spider legs for lashes... but I can understand why she's pissed and feels like crap, I hope she checks out leaving him alone.

I also want to play poker with him because he has that clamping down on his jaw and saying nothing when he knows he's busted. Me: "So you think you have me beat here?" *he looks at the full house in his hand but doesn't say anything, just stares forward and clenches his jaw* Me: Yeah, I'm out...

I was also living for when Rosanna started going all MMA beatdown back in her romm with the girls and Tatum was all serious all of a sudden like "Yeah, don't hit me again..."

I'm a little pissed FOX gave up on this so easily. I mean c'mon you're FOX what else are you going to put in it's place? *sigh*

This is what happens when Fox cancels Lucifer.

[RealReality]

Ugh, shut up Brittney.

Jair can shut up too...."there are more respectful ways to shake things up". Dude STFU and stop pretending like any of you deserve some vaunted level of respect.  You are on a trashy reality show, this isn't survivor, this is the low budget version of bachelor in paradise.

You need to do whatever it takes to be entertaining.

[RealReality]

23 hours ago, Wandering Snark said:

I also want to know how/why Carlos is somehow everyone's backup plan?

As for the announcer I forgive him the accent for this week, as he was hilarious. "We're all set for a breakfast of eggs and tension."

Did the semi-ex GF have those horrible lash extensions? It looked like she had spider legs for lashes... but I can understand why she's pissed and feels like crap, I hope she checks out leaving him alone.

I also want to play poker with him because he has that clamping down on his jaw and saying nothing when he knows he's busted. Me: "So you think you have me beat here?" *he looks at the full house in his hand but doesn't say anything, just stares forward and clenches his jaw* Me: Yeah, I'm out...

I was also living for when Rosanna started going all MMA beatdown back in her romm with the girls and Tatum was all serious all of a sudden like "Yeah, don't hit me again..."

I'm a little pissed FOX gave up on this so easily. I mean c'mon you're FOX what else are you going to put in it's place? *sigh*

This show has such potential.  They should not have let they guys pick who went home, they should have just let a shark eat Britney.

I'm not sure what Nicole promised America, but I was here for it!  

I needed someone thirsty enough to stir the pot!  She looked broke as hell, but she has a pretty smile and perfect for reality TV.  She must be a stewardess on like spirit or something.

Are britney and jair supposed to be a couple now? Zzzzzzzzzz

I wish jair would pick mariaelena.  She has really grown on me, I was wrong about her.  Britney is just boring and lame....begone bitch!

22 hours ago, mertensia said:

David and Kendall calmly watching the batshittery going down and his snarking made me laugh.

the narrator's disdain for...everyone is hilarious. 

But WTF was that about "he needs to show her her place?"  

Bobby Ray trying to wrap his head around Tatum's being a genius was also hilarious.

David and Kendall are boring.  He is really cute, but I don't know.  Their drama is boring "I'm doing everything...."

13 hours ago, Rebky said:

It makes no sense.  There is no way they can pull this off.

Tyler? My advice to you is to pick the one who won't turn into a raging bitch at the drop of a hat. Life will be so much easier. Trust me.

It's pretty amusing because she clearly wants to have a relationship off the show and he very clearly does not.  

I think he is scared of telling her that outright because she will obviously poison his eggs....or just suffocate him in his sleep.

But that scene when she kept talking about meeting his family and he would.....talk about the game....uhh yeah, he isn't taking you to meet his mom sweet pea.

She seems like she could go stalker crazy real.quick.

9 hours ago, Ohwell said:

Rosanna honey, you need more than big boobs to get a man to stay with you. 

Dude did Nicole ever have her number when she told her she was only good for one thing.

[Wandering Snark]

5 hours ago, ketose said:

This is what happens when Fox cancels Lucifer.

Fox. Ruins. Everything.

6 hours ago, kita said:

And I've concluded that neither Shailee nor Rosanna care about Tyler, or else one of them would REMIND HIM TO PUT SUNSCREEN UNDER HIS EYES!!! That looks like it hurts!

Yes, his 'cancer waiting to happen' sunburn was what made admonish them to believe me and wear sunscreen!! Yikes.

Forgot to say how I loved Bobby Ray caught in the crossfire stuckin 'should I stay or should I go' mode:

BR: I think I should go..

Ro: No, stay!

BR: Yeahhh... I should go...

Hah!

[HorrrGoodnight]

On 5/24/2019 at 1:06 AM, Wandering Snark said:

also want to know how/why Carlos is somehow everyone's backup plan

They know Carlos is Mr New Booty the flip flopper. Since he has ZERO loyalty, it's always worth a shot.

6 hours ago, RealReality said:

I'm not sure what Nicole promised America, but I was here for it!  

I needed someone thirsty enough to stir the pot!  She looked broke as hell, but she has a pretty smile and perfect for reality TV.  She must be a stewardess on like spirit or something.

I missed Nicole the second she walked away! They did her just like Deiondria 😩 

She was gorgeous, I don't think she looked "broke as hell" though 😂 She probably went and bought a whole wardrobe just for the show but didn't have a designer budget. Had she known herstay would be so short, she could have made a better investment.

[RealReality]

50 minutes ago, SlutAssBitchAssHor said:

They know Carlos is Mr New Booty the flip flopper. Since he has ZERO loyalty, it's always worth a shot.

I missed Nicole the second she walked away! They did her just like Deiondria 😩 

She was gorgeous, I don't think she looked "broke as hell" though 😂 She probably went and bought a whole wardrobe just for the show but didn't have a designer budget. Had she known herstay would be so short, she could have made a better investment.

Yeah, imma try real hard not to accuse the producers of anything, but that was bullshit.  Jair got a free pass as America's choice but the guys got to vote out a girl?

These pussywhipped dummies naturally targeted Nicole so as not to rock the boat.  Ridiculous.  If I wanted to watch a show about normal people acting rationally id watch.....like anything else besides something called "paradise hotel"

You're right, I probably judged Nicole by her bathing suit which was saggy in the booty.  But I was living for her stirring the pot, especially with Roseanne.

Also, go away basic Britney, like girl no one was talking to you and you are so thirsty to get into that roseanne/Tatum clique.  Mind your business lady!

Jair hasnt done anything interesting so far, and I suspect he is going to pick basic Becky Britney so mariaelena will be gone.

Edited May 25, 2019 by RealReality

[RealReality]

6 hours ago, Wandering Snark said:

Fox. Ruins. Everything.

Yes, his 'cancer waiting to happen' sunburn was what made admonish them to believe me and wear sunscreen!! Yikes.

Forgot to say how I loved Bobby Ray caught in the crossfire stuckin 'should I stay or should I go' mode:

BR: I think I should go..

Ro: No, stay!

BR: Yeahhh... I should go...

Hah!

Why are two women fighting over a guy who repeatedly forgets?  I mean I know he is constantly thinking of getting camera time so he is occupied, but come on!

My most cringe scene this episode was watching Kaitlyn pretend to be into Carlos...."oh, I love it when a man is like 5'5, manscaped to within an inch of his life and goes to the gym 10-12 times a day .....that's so hot, especially when he makes up a ridiculous nickname and refers to himself in the third person...let's make out"

I also want to commend Kaitlyn for being body confident enough to keep her naturally small chest.

Side question: if Carlos is at the gym 10-12 times a day, how does he always skip leg day?  

[HorrrGoodnight]

47 minutes ago, RealReality said:

Also, go away basic Britney, like girl no one was talking to you and you are so thirsty to get into that roseanne/Tatum clique.  Mind your business lady!

Could she be annnnny more desperate? I hope Jair dumps her and keeps Mari. Shes one of the few intersting ones. Kendall and Whoever... throw the whole couple away

[Ohwell]

4 hours ago, SlutAssBitchAssHor said:

I missed Nicole the second she walked away! They did her just like Deiondria 😩 

I expect to see Deiondria pretty soon on another reality show since she's Deion Sanders' daughter.  Too bad she and Nicole left so soon though.

[Wandering Snark]

4 hours ago, RealReality said:

Side question: if Carlos is at the gym 10-12 times a day, how does he always skip leg day?  

Agreed on missing leg day!

I do give Kaitlyn credit for not responding in any negative way when he said he goes to the gym 10-12 times a day. My eyes would have popped wide and my mouth dropped, she's a better actress than me!

[HorrrGoodnight]

1 hour ago, Wandering Snark said:

Agreed on missing leg day!

I do give Kaitlyn credit for not responding in any negative way when he said he goes to the gym 10-12 times a day. My eyes would have popped wide and my mouth dropped, she's a better actress than me!

I hope he also works at this gym cause.... 10 times a day?? The logistics of it all. 🤔

Edited May 25, 2019 by SlutAssBitchAssHor

[AManfred]

Wish there were live feeds with this show. The reason I decided to watch PH was because it was originally scheduled to air numerous time a week, which sucks me in better than shows that only air once a week. (Anyone remember Utopia from a few years back?)

The theme song sticks in my head-- just realized last night it is a current Top 40 song: 

[Ms Blue Jay]

My imitation of Tyler's ex Shireen or whatever her name is:

"I literally love you like I literally can't believe you would do this to me like we literally broke up a month ago like you literally have moved on already like you literally kissed someone else I literally am devastated because you literally already are dating someone else like I literally can't believe it"

Kill me!

11 hours ago, AManfred said:

The theme song sticks in my head-- just realized last night it is a current Top 40 song: 

Same, and same.  Word for word.

[JenE4]

Oh, man! I just caught up on this show to find out it’s canceled?!? It just started getting juicy!! It suddenly made sense why Tyler glommed onto Roseanna’s neediness—he wanted a commitment with his ex, but Shailee wouldn’t commit to Tyler after a year of being together...but is somehow also upset that he didn’t stay committed to her? But Tyler was just desperate for someone to want to be with him—so why not go along with Roseanna’s insistence that it’s love at first sight? Tyler needs to move on from these “alpha females” and just find someone normal who will appreciate him—go for Brittany.

Amazing that Roseanna was “cool and collected” when the not-quite-an-ex showed up, but she lost her goddamned mind over Tyler acknowledging the existence of the other girls—even when it was just to tell them that he was in a relationship with Ro! And this was AFTER she freaked out that he WASN’T talking to them because if he ignored them completely they would want him for playing hard to get, so he talks to them, and Ro goes insane. The fact that she managed to “hold it together” in front of Shailee, I got murderess vibes—I need to play it innocent so they’ll won’t suspect I poisoned her tea. But Hans was right!! They should replace Kristin with Hans to come back and say, see, I told you Ro was trouble! 

That British guy with the passive-aggressive voiceovers is the best! Daaamn, he is calling them out!!

[RealReality]

9 hours ago, JenE4 said:

Oh, man! I just caught up on this show to find out it’s canceled?!? It just started getting juicy!! It suddenly made sense why Tyler glommed onto Roseanna’s neediness—he wanted a commitment with his ex, but Shailee wouldn’t commit to Tyler after a year of being together...but is somehow also upset that he didn’t stay committed to her? But Tyler was just desperate for someone to want to be with him—so why not go along with Roseanna’s insistence that it’s love at first sight? Tyler needs to move on from these “alpha females” and just find someone normal who will appreciate him—go for Brittany.

Amazing that Roseanna was “cool and collected” when the not-quite-an-ex showed up, but she lost her goddamned mind over Tyler acknowledging the existence of the other girls—even when it was just to tell them that he was in a relationship with Ro! And this was AFTER she freaked out that he WASN’T talking to them because if he ignored them completely they would want him for playing hard to get, so he talks to them, and Ro goes insane. The fact that she managed to “hold it together” in front of Shailee, I got murderess vibes—I need to play it innocent so they’ll won’t suspect I poisoned her tea. But Hans was right!! They should replace Kristin with Hans to come back and say, see, I told you Ro was trouble! 

That British guy with the passive-aggressive voiceovers is the best! Daaamn, he is calling them out!!

I'd say there is like a 55% chance Rosanna stalks Tyler after the show.  If for no other reason than she can get more attention by being the subject of a dateline hosted by Keith Morrison.

He has zero intention of dating her after the show.  Shailee was scandalized that he had slept with Rosanna (and I think they were doing that in a matter of hours) and Tyler was very shifty when Rosanna talked about it.  I suspect he comes from a family where everyone judges women as saints or sluts, and well....

Wish we could trade Brittney for crazy hans.  TBF though I'd trade basic Brittney for like five more cheesy announcer jokes.

[Wandering Snark]

This does have all the feelings of a series trying to do a three episode ending arc after they thought they were being renewed for another year. Everything is getting to feel a bit forced. Still wish we'd been allowed to see the full multiday with a live episode etc. show we were introduced to. Might have been fun. Oh wells...

I hope Basic Brittney and Two-Timer Tyler hit the bricks. I did feel a bit for Tyler though because Shailee obviously has a nice little black book of "friends" that she can then sleep with at any moment. I mean Tyler is an idiot for sleeping with Ro but at least he was on a show that's all about hooking people up. Shailee found someone to sleep with in, what, a week? With no help from a reality show! Beware Tyler. She's as shady as the rest of them!

And again WHO and WHY would trust Carlos??? He's the worst! Err second worst I guess as I don't feel Tatum has a genuine bone in her body. At least he didn't stand behind Tatum at the ceremony like she wanted him to. Hard to play a player, I guess?

Tatum is all kinds of gaslighting Brittney after steamrolling everyone to vote Jarrod. Tatum was all 'OMG I don't know HOW you can be mad at ME for picking the worst of three guys so you can't do better then me in the game than me??' She's just heinous. "Those other two would have walked in and gone straight to other girls!' So nice of you to 'save' Brittney from those other jackals, especially the one Brittney TOLD you she was interested in. Tatum is such a bitch.

As for Tatum/Carlos it's the olde tyme saying 'If you are cheating with someone don't then be surprised when they cheat on you.' But maybe they deserve each other...

[mertensia]

I finally figured out who Brittany looks like to me (and bear in mind that I'm somewhat faceblind): season 3 of America's Next Top Model Nicole Borud.

Brittany is not at all the suspicious type. How she can blindly believe weaselly Tatum is beyond me.

Jared has less conversational skills than the Bachelor's Colton. If I hadn't see it, I wouldn't believe it.

[JenE4]

I’m really hoping that Tatum and Carlos make it to the top-two couples—ideally against the most innocuous couple, David and Kendall—THEN they find out that the winner is chosen by ALL the past cast members that they DESTROYED to make it to the top. David and Kendall will win in a unanimous decision, and viewers at home and the producers writing the big checks will be like, Huh? Were these two even on this show?!

[RealReality]

31 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

I’m really hoping that Tatum and Carlos make it to the top-two couples—ideally against the most innocuous couple, David and Kendall—THEN they find out that the winner is chosen by ALL the past cast members that they DESTROYED to make it to the top. David and Kendall will win in a unanimous decision, and viewers at home and the producers writing the big checks will be like, Huh? Were these two even on this show?!

LOL, none of these fools deserve 250k and I'd bet good money that it turns out that the fine print is that they all have "the opportunity" to win 250k.....in potential future televison appearances and a lifetime supply of fake lashes and botox injections.

[kita]

I would watch this show just for the narrator. "We can't show you what Tatum and Bobby Ray are doing...FOR THE NEXT 30 SECONDS, WOMP WOMP."
And Kaitlin coming in as the dark horse pot stirrer, atta girl! You can tell that Brittany still has the low self-esteem from being overweight, she just let herself get pushed around here. And man, is her flirt game ever weakkkkkk.
Host's earrings were... oversized plastic paperclip chains?
At least Brittany cares about new guy enough to warn him about his face! No one does that for poor Tyler, who is looking as lobster faced as ever. I'm so confused about how his and Shailee's storyline is supposed to make sense. Oh well.

Addendum: WHY WILL NO ONE GET CARLOS OFF MY TV? None of these people love me!

Edited May 31, 2019 by kita
Watched the last few minutes oops

[RealReality]

Jair is maybe the biggest idiot ever.  Dude basic Brittney isn't into you.  I'm disappointed in America cause this guy is a total boring ass dud.

He could have kept a downass chick who he was friendly with.  Instead he has basic, thirsty Brittney.  BOOOOOOO

Why is shaliees lipliner done so poorly.  She might have tried to do her makeup drunk.

LOL @ Rosanna.

Is "papi suazon" some sort of brand Carlos is starting?  I'm five minutes into the show and he has said it like 7 times ..or maybe once.. either way, what gives?