Jenelle: Birther Of 3, Mother To None

[littleB1rdy]

Imagine all the screaming and yelling that went on behind the scenes of THIS super fake happy family photo shoot. “Nose in the corner Kaiser!”

[leighroda]

I’m actually ok with not having a party for a 1 yr old... the first bday is more for the parent than the child, that being said, if a parent wants that party, more power to them, there’s nothing wrong with celebrating even if the child won’t remember, the family as a whole will. But I do find it ridiculous to stage a photo shoot instead of a party, it’s like she’s going to try to trick ensley into thinking she had a party, like when she’s older and complaining how Jenelle didn’t play Yahtzee with her, Jenelle will pull out the pictures and be like “leave me aloooonnnneeee see we had a party”.

I can’t quite put my finger on why I don’t think the photo shoot is weird, but it just is to me. It seems out of character for Jenelle, I feel like the real reason they didn’t have a party is because there aren’t many people who would come, David’s Mom and Jamie are the only people they aren’t feuding with.

At the same time it’s typical Jenelle, the same person who pulled out all the stops and bought all of Etsy for her wedding... but decides a party for someone else isn’t necessary, just take pictures like there was a party. If you don’t want to have a party, fine, but not have a party but stage a photo shoot like there was is weird.

[smhjess]

2 hours ago, BitterApple said:

Is Kaiser cross-eyed? Jenelle needs to get him to the optometrist.

He is descended from the crest of Griffin and no one in that line has ever needed glasses.  Jenelle and David can't be bothered to give him medicine prescribed by doctors and Nathan is too obsessed with being a superior master race to accept his child may need glasses so he is never getting to an optometrist.

[GreatKazu]

9 minutes ago, leighroda said:

I’m actually ok with not having a party for a 1 yr old... the first bday is more for the parent than the child, that being said, if a parent wants that party, more power to them, there’s nothing wrong with celebrating even if the child won’t remember, the family as a whole will. But I do find it ridiculous to stage a photo shoot instead of a party, it’s like she’s going to try to trick ensley into thinking she had a party, like when she’s older and complaining how Jenelle didn’t play Yahtzee with her, Jenelle will pull out the pictures and be like “leave me aloooonnnneeee see we had a party”.

I can’t quite put my finger on why I don’t think the photo shoot is weird, but it just is to me. It seems out of character for Jenelle, I feel like the real reason they didn’t have a party is because there aren’t many people who would come, David’s Mom and Jamie are the only people they aren’t feuding with.

At the same time it’s typical Jenelle, the same person who pulled out all the stops and bought all of Etsy for her wedding... but decides a party for someone else isn’t necessary, just take pictures like there was a party. If you don’t want to have a party, fine, but not have a party but stage a photo shoot like there was is weird.

I think this is exactly it. Who would show up for the party? 

I think one of the tweets from Jenelle that @druzy posted, mentioned something about Jenelle was eager to have a party for Eggsley and how she had picked out a girl's theme long ago. I know I didn't dream that shit. 

Back to Eggsley on that unicorn: 

 

 

[druzy]

9 minutes ago, GreatKazu said:

I think this is exactly it. Who would show up for the party? 

I think one of the tweets from Jenelle that @druzy posted, mentioned something about Jenelle was eager to have a party for Eggsley and how she had picked out a girl's theme long ago. I know I didn't dream that shit. 

Back to Eggsley on that unicorn: 

 

 

 

5 hours ago, monicageller said:

Those pictures are spot-on @GreatKazu!

@monicageller posted the above Instagram post explaining the no party party.

[Chaos Theory]

Parties for young (young!) children are mostly a get together for the parents.  There is nothing wrong with that.  As you grow up you stop having beer bong parties and start having “get togethers” with other friends who have kids your kids age.  Plus is a good way to start socializing your kid and your family with other families.     The problem is that Jenelle has no friends.  I am pretty sure she has a list of enemies that might attend and bring gifts though if she provides food.   

Edited January 24, 2018 by Chaos Theory

[GreatKazu]

So specific...

 

[littleB1rdy]

3 minutes ago, GreatKazu said:

So specific...

 

Okay but what about your ugly husband? 

[MyPeopleAreNordic]

23 hours ago, leighroda said:

I can’t quite put my finger on why I don’t think the photo shoot is weird, but it just is to me. It seems out of character for Jenelle, I feel like the real reason they didn’t have a party is because there aren’t many people who would come, David’s Mom and Jamie are the only people they aren’t feuding with.

At the same time it’s typical Jenelle, the same person who pulled out all the stops and bought all of Etsy for her wedding... but decides a party for someone else isn’t necessary, just take pictures like there was a party. If you don’t want to have a party, fine, but not have a party but stage a photo shoot like there was is weird.

It's weird because it's just fucking weird.  Have a birthday party themed photo shoot  but no birthday party? Ya high, Jenelle, ya high!

And it looks like she bought a lot of Etsy for this photoshoot, too. 

I can barely get my 3 year old and 1 year old to take a picture where they're both still and looking at the camera (let alone doing both and smiling at the same time).  Doing a celebration-themed photo shoot with them myself sounds like anything BUT a celebration. Ya'll know this was 100x worse than what happened when Jenelle and David did their Save the Date "photo shoot."

Edited January 25, 2018 by MyPeopleAreNordic

[ghoulina]

5 hours ago, CaliforniaLove said:

"Party photo shoot"? #MomTips?!?!??!??!??!??! You know, you can actually take pictures at a birthday CELEBRATION that you will remember forever. I'm not saying a one-year old needs a 50k "Tori Spelling" style party, but wtf is this nonsense?!? This makes Aubree's "recreated" birthdays with a grocery store carrot cake & nobody around seem normal in comparison. 

Right? Instead of a party, we took some pictures. Instead of presents, we let your siblings dump some shit out of a pinata on your head. You'll remember them forever! 

 

(Like why does she think Ensley WOULDN'T remember her siblings forever? Are they going somewhere?)

4 hours ago, littleB1rdy said:

Imagine all the screaming and yelling that went on behind the scenes of THIS super fake happy family photo shoot. “Nose in the corner Kaiser!”

And poor little Kai crying, "Feed Me" when Jenelle's quest for the most Insta-worthy photo kept the kids in front of that white sheet for 5 hours straight. 

[Mkay]

[druzy]

[leighroda]

2 hours ago, littleB1rdy said:

Okay but what about your ugly husband? 

This actually makes me so mad at Jenelle... she acts like we are ridiculous to speculate any abuse when she has literally claimed to be abused by every person she has dated, and for the most part it’s out of concern, I mean yeah lots of people, myself included make off hand comments, but nobody truly wants to see her hurt, or one of the children hurt. It’s her usual cycle, everything is hunky-dory, until the break up, then she was being abused the entire time and it was terrible but we just didn’t know what was going on because she put on a happy face. Yet she wants to ridicule fans for being concerned for her.

[lovesnark]

2 hours ago, ghoulina said:

Right? Instead of a party, we took some pictures. Instead of presents, we let your siblings dump some shit out of a pinata on your head. You'll remember them forever! 

 

(Like why does she think Ensley WOULDN'T remember her siblings forever? Are they going somewhere?)

And poor little Kai crying, "Feed Me" when Jenelle's quest for the most Insta-worthy photo kept the kids in front of that white sheet for 5 hours straight. 

Looks like her siblings dumped a bunch of Jolly Ranchers and other candy out of the piñata that Endtable couldn't even have. It's a wonder she didn't choke to death before one of the bigger kids was able to pick it all up. Aside from them having not a friend in the world to invite to a birthday party, she failed to mention in her endless posts that they were in California buying dope and ordering cheap t-shirts on her birthday. Do you think UBT filled the room with uppercuts to break the piñata?

[monicageller]

5 hours ago, Chaos Theory said:

Parties for young (young!) children are mostly a get together for the parents.  There is nothing wrong with that.  As you grow up you stop having beer bong parties and start having “get togethers” with other friends who have kids your kids age.  Plus is a good way to start socializing your kid and your family with other families.     The problem is that Jenelle has no friends.  I am pretty sure she has a list of enemies that might attend and bring gifts though if she provides food.   

Unless you're Maci.

[Mkay]

3 hours ago, druzy said:

Don’t forget they were a high in this picture.  ?

[Booted]

5 hours ago, Mkay said:

You know Jenelle has probably said something about Barb being with Colin so much with Jace and Gabriel in tow. I don't blame her from this post I would not think visiting with this individual is what a young boy needs to be doing. Barb should do this stuff on her own time since she is retired and has the time now. 

That picture of Ensley is very very cute she looks like a doll. Sorry but Watson is no comparison to this picture and her eyes don't look dead she looks adorable. 

[Mkay]

 

David made the unicorn horn all by himself. Someone posted the pic on twitter but I didn’t take a screen shot.  Darn. Anyway,  um yea.  ?‍♀️

Edited January 25, 2018 by Mkay

[GreatKazu]

2 hours ago, Mkay said:

Don’t forget they were a high in this picture.  ?

They are high all the damn time. 

Just now, Mkay said:

WTF?

[druzy]

Kaiser is a great photographer! 

Edited January 25, 2018 by druzy

[rafibomb]

8 hours ago, GreatKazu said:

I think this is exactly it. Who would show up for the party? 

I think one of the tweets from Jenelle that @druzy posted, mentioned something about Jenelle was eager to have a party for Eggsley and how she had picked out a girl's theme long ago. I know I didn't dream that shit. 

Back to Eggsley on that unicorn: 

 

 

I swear when I first saw that first picture, I thought the unicorn was barfing. 

Barfing a party noisemaker, of course, because that's what a unicorn would barf. 

[BitterApple]

51 minutes ago, Booted said:

You know Jenelle has probably said something about Barb being with Colin so much with Jace and Gabriel in tow. I don't blame her from this post I would not think visiting with this individual is what a young boy needs to be doing. Barb should do this stuff on her own time since she is retired and has the time now. 

That picture of Ensley is very very cute she looks like a doll. Sorry but Watson is no comparison to this picture and her eyes don't look dead she looks adorable. 

Yeah, for as much as I wouldn't want my kid around Jenelle, I wouldn't want them around Colin or Ashley either. All three of them are certifiable. 

[GreatKazu]

@druzy this is the tweet I was referring to earlier. Jenelle had posted  about picking a girl's theme for years when someone asked about a party. 

A broke ass unicorn cake that looks like it has a weapon sticking out of it and a white sheet is the theme she dreamed of for years!!

 

Edited January 25, 2018 by GreatKazu

[lovesnark]

41 minutes ago, GreatKazu said:

They are high all the damn time. 

WTF?

WTF, indeed.  Jenelle bought every unicorn item offered on Etsy and he couldn't look around and see the horn comes out of the forehead? The horn is sticking out of it's neck. Way to go there, you fucking moron.

[druzy]

8 minutes ago, GreatKazu said:

@druzy this is the tweet I was referring to earlier. Jenelle had posted  about picking a girl's theme for years when someone asked about a party. 

A broke ass unicorn cake that looks like it has a weapon sticking out of it and a white sheet is the theme she dreamed of for years!!

 

Oh- now I get what you were referring to! 

Lol-broke ass unicorn cake! I wonder if she covered Endsley's gift with a towel. 

[GreatKazu]

16 minutes ago, druzy said:

Oh- now I get what you were referring to! 

Lol-broke ass unicorn cake! I wonder if she covered Endsley's gift with a towel. 

lol

She should cover Eggsley's head with a towel. Better yet, cover her dead eyes.

Edited January 25, 2018 by GreatKazu

[CaliforniaLove]

Quote

and her eyes don't look dead she looks adorable. 

Not dead at all...the movie "The Covenant" comes to mind, but she is a cutie.

[littleB1rdy]

9 hours ago, druzy said:

Kaiser is a great photographer! 

Ensley with the dead eyes again. Or maybe she’s confused about who the two creeps next to her are.

[Mkay]

[littleB1rdy]

Probably a last minute party cause she saw everyone making fun of the photo shoot. Jace honestly got lucky not having to be there in the house of horrors with all these half and step siblings he barely knows. He gets to be at home with his real mom eating home cooked meals. 

[druzy]

David filed a motion regarding his son

[toodywoody]

Jesus, Kai barely made that photo. I swear, you would think in the photos with her parents that she would look a little excited but she just looks like, 'oh these assholes again'

[crazychicken]

24 minutes ago, toodywoody said:

Jesus, Kai barely made that photo.

At least he made it unlike the birthday girl. Notice all the kids have changed yet Eggsley and her parents are still in white from the photo shoot in the cake shots. Eggsley is eating rainbow cake the others have vanilla, Eggsley also has the same top pony as the photo shoot day. My bet is the Jace was not the only kid missing from the party as  normal parents would pull the birthday girls highchair up to the table so they can enjoy their party.

[Pixiebomb]

13 hours ago, Mkay said:

 

David made the unicorn horn all by himself. Someone posted the pic on twitter but I didn’t take a screen shot.  Darn. Anyway,  um yea.  ?‍♀️

Why does this horse have a cone coming out of it's ear?

[BOOgen3]

3 hours ago, Mkay said:

You are doing it wrong if you need a hammer to cut the cake.

[Bridget]

14 hours ago, Mkay said:

 

David made the unicorn horn all by himself. Someone posted the pic on twitter but I didn’t take a screen shot.  Darn. Anyway,  um yea.  ?‍♀️

Am I the only one who is traumatized by the sight of a cake in the shape of a horse's head?

Fucking David is probably trying to get the kids used to the idea of animals going to heaven.

And then to be expected to eat a piece?

Oh hell no.

4 hours ago, littleB1rdy said:

Ensley with the dead eyes again. Or maybe she’s confused about who the two creeps next to her are.

She is also probably wishing that she was celebrating with Watson instead...you know, to see what a normal family looks like and how they engage with their children!

Edited January 25, 2018 by Bridget

[MyPeopleAreNordic]

21 hours ago, ghoulina said:

(Like why does she think Ensley WOULDN'T remember her siblings forever? Are they going somewhere?)

.....to be in Barb's custody, in Doris's custody, David's (less trashy) sister's custody, Maryssa's other family's custody, or CPS custody....

...or just to live with their other parent (since none of them share the same set of parents). 

I mean, it's likely to eventually happen. This is Jenelle (and David).  

Edited January 25, 2018 by MyPeopleAreNordic

[GreatKazu]

2 hours ago, druzy said:

David filed a motion regarding his son

Another child to add to the mix at The Land. Another child to be exposed to the abuse. 

5 hours ago, Mkay said:

WTF is that mess on the stairs? Was Jenelle fighting with Dave and throwing his shit down the stairs? 

[BitterApple]

Hold up. Is that sad excuse for a cake laid out on a greasy, used pizza box?! Only the best for your baby girl, eh Jenelle?

Poor Eggsley. It's only gonna get worse from here.

[druzy]

It obviously doesn't work for Jenelle or Uppercuts Dave.

[druzy]

How old is Maryssa?

[DudeLeaveMeAlone]

16 hours ago, druzy said:

How old is Maryssa?

Me and David. Gawd. Guess the schools aren't well for Jenelle either.

[lovesnark]

21 hours ago, druzy said:

David filed a motion regarding his son

That was an interesting read. As we suspected, UBT was allowed some supervised visits. They were happening at his non crazy sister's home. More time with the little boy was supposed to be phased in gradually but his ex has completely cut off communication with him. He's asking the court to find her in contempt for violating the parenting plan. But, I think it's safe to speculate that she's filed her own motion outlining the 1001 reasons why that little boy should never be in the care of the swamp things.  I laughed my ass off reading it because he's accusing her of doing everything he and Jenelle have done to make things next to impossible for the other parent. The difference is, his ex has excellent reasons to keep that baby away from the gruesome twosome.

[druzy]

Put your nose in the corner with Maci.

Edited January 26, 2018 by druzy

[CaliforniaLove]

She actually thinks she's a "mom"? She actually thinks her atrocious behavior is...funny? Sorry Jenelle, while you are joke of a human being, continuing to make money off of it is most definitely not humorous. 

[lovesnark]

The agreement between UBT and his ex was entered into in February of last year. Considering what has gone on with the swamp things in the last 12 months, it's not surprising to learn that Olivia has put a stop to any contact. Shall we take a trip down memory lane?

 

Endtable is born stoned and CPS is actively investigating (but not doing enough) Jenelle jokes on social media about CPS being at their house all the time.

Jace and Kaiser are locked out of the house on a sweltering hot day.

Jace gets lost in the swamp for hours and no one is even aware he's missing.

Jenelle and UBT go crazier and crazier in an attempt to discredit Barb. See chasing her down in restaurant parking lot and pounding on her house for two hours.

Jenelle gets boilerplate visitation with Jace after being urged by the judge and her attorney to not air her dirty laundry in court. The visitation agreement specifically says UBT is NOT to discipline Jace in any way, shape or form.

Jace tells his real mother, Barb, that he's afraid of UBT.

Doris documents bruises and Kaiser saying UBT hits him and begins the long road of establishing a pattern of abuse to lay the foundation for gaining visitation and custody.

Jenelle and UBT treat Kaiser horribly ON FILM while doing their trashtastic Save the Date photos.

The "I'm Fuckin Rakin!" video showing how violent and out of control the swamp things are is sold to Radar.

Jenelle and UBT continue to exhibit out of control behavior on social media. UBT twice threatens on social media to rape and sodomize someone's mother.

 

The list goes on and this is just what is known publicly. Who knows what else has happened that we're not privy to. I wouldn't let those two lunatics have visitation with a cardboard cut out of a child, never mind an actual living being.

[Mkay]

[druzy]

[CaliforniaLove]

Why did she show a weird mannequin hand that does not have her name tattooed on the knuckles? Does she mean it will be in that style? Anyway, not like it matters...he's putting his name on the body parts most likely to be chopped off when he uses a power saw high...while WORKIN'!! ON THE LAND!!!!

[leighroda]

I’ve never seen someone with a clothing line be the only model... sometimes they are in some of the pictures (I think this is what Maci has done) but I’ve never seen the owner/creator be the sole model, which to me makes this whole clothing line thing seem super self serving, her clothes are just basic articles with dumb sayings that are over done, the only one I find remotely entertaining is the dramastic one... I love Alfredo, but have never felt the need to declare that through my wardrobe.