Kim Richards: No Escape from Witch Mountain

[Umbelina]

Kim gets aggressive when she's under the influence or in desperate need of a drink (when it's more resentful than vicious.)  It's her courage.

 

She doesn't want to give up her crutches, but probably because she simply can't imagine coping without them.  She's terrified of that, of what she might be like without that, and terrified of who she is with that as well. 

 

There is simply no easy answer for her, and imagining one into existence won't make it come true.  You just can't give someone courage or strength, or will it into being something in her skill set when it isn't there.  I don't know if she could summon it even if something horrible happened to one of her children because of it.  We keep thinking she's hit rock bottom, but I don't think she has, and I don't know that even if she did she would have that "pick yourself up by your bootstraps" skill.

 

Some don't.

 

Do I think Kim wants to be an out of control drunk and drug user?  No.  I absolutely do not.

Do I think Kim has what it takes to ever change that?  No, certainly not now, maybe not ever.

 

Do I think Kim puts her loved ones through hell?  Yes.  Absolutely.

Do I think Kim is also in hell?  Yes.  Absolutely.  But that also is part of what drives her to booze and pills. 

 

That's another thing, I do think she probably does need some of the pills, so again, it's a tricky, slippery slope for her. 

Anti-depressants?  Probably needed.  Probably abused. 

Anti-anxiety meds?  Probably needed. Probably abused.

 

Deep therapy is needed, but that probably involves facing childhood issues that she absolutely does not want to face.  Again, it's not a "blame mom" thing, it's a "be realistic and forgive mom" thing.  She's not ready, and at this point, I doubt she ever will be ready.

 

So, what does that leave?  If you can't change the addict, change the way you cope with the addict.  I think we've seen the family try a few things, but what Yours Truly and what I am saying is, sometimes, none of that common stuff will work.  Tough Love is a good catch phrase and maybe even works, at times, with some.  This family though has a public, very public, image, so they have different needs, and different assets.  Neither of us is even saying that our somewhat radical way of coping WOULD WORK, because nothing may work, but the idea behind it does work.  Change yourself, change the way YOU cope with it, release your own happiness being dependent on what the addict does or doesn't do.

 

It's just a very complicated situation, reducing it to simple solutions doesn't work.  Getting angry doesn't work either, because that wrath is nothing compared to the release from that wrath, and her own self loathing, insecurity, and desperation substances give her.

 

ETA

I think the family has tried all of the common solutions.  One after another they've failed.  Rock bottom (arrested, being thrown out of her daughter's wedding) has also failed.  Tough love?  Failing.  Conditional love?  Failing.  Embarrassing her?  Failed.  Get her a job?  Failed.  Therapy?  So far, failed.  Rehabs?  Failed.

 

ETA once more.

The part where I think some of us may disagree is (very simply and not well stated is:) 

The petulance.  Is Kim simply refusing to change out of some sort of petulance or stubbornness or entitlement? 

I don't think so.  I think that, as of now, she simply can't. 

Edited March 10, 2016 by Umbelina

[notnowimbusy]

I just watched the fill WWHL.   When Kim has rehearsed an answer she talks in lower tones, sits back in her chair, and tries to come across as convincing.   When she's thrown, her voice goes up several octaves, she puts on that little girl voice and tries to sound cute.  Whatever is being asked, she wants to brush it off like a joke.  When she doesn't like what's being asked, she immediately uncrosses her legs, flattens her feet firmly, goes to the edge of the chair and leans forward.  

 

I found it interesting that she mentioned having a glass of wine with a friend, then clarifies it was at her house.  So, does she keep wine at her house OR did Brandi bring it with her :-)   Her story has wide discrepancies from what she said on Dr Phil.   There was no mention of Chad, she was at Kimberly's and when Kimberly went to class she watched some of the episodes. 

 

She seriously thought this new show was about building things????   Are you kidding me?   Somebody just said we want you on TV - and no matter what it was she was onboard - even if it meant humiliating her daughter - again.   And I did watch the new show - and Kimberly is one messed up kid.   Her siblings have somehow made her responsible for her mom - and so has Kim herself.  That a big burden for a young girl - especially when your Mom has as many issues as Kim does.

 

And the "I needed a break" - uh so that's why she didn't take Dr. Phil up on his offer, and is that why she skipped out early, in the middle of the night, to go to Mexico - and whatever happened down there, she went MIA and the family had to send people down to get her and put her in yet another rehab!   Yeah, that's a break alright. 

 

One thing that really bothers me is she takes all the credit for being there and taking care of Monty.  His other wife, Teri Doss, seemed to be there more than Kim, and her daughters really stepped up.  Teri always had the class and decency to acknowledge Kim, but Kim has never said the care Monty got was a group of people who love him, not just Kim.

[Umbelina]

She's an addict.  Addicts lie.

 

What would really be interesting is if she ever really gets sober.  Something tells me that if she ever, EVER is capable of truthfully facing everything, no longer hiding anything at all, confronting those demons head on?  Would her sisters be more thrilled that Kim is finally healthy, or more horrified at what she might actually expose?

 

Probably a bit from column A and a chunk from column B as well.  Be careful what you wish for.

Edited March 10, 2016 by Umbelina

[WireWrap]

Kim gets aggressive when she's under the influence or in desperate need of a drink (when it's more resentful than vicious.)  It's her courage.

 

She doesn't want to give up her crutches, but probably because she simply can't imagine coping without them.  She's terrified of that, of what she might be like without that, and terrified of who she is with that as well. 

 

There is simply no easy answer for her, and imagining one into existence won't make it come true.  You just can't give someone courage or strength, or will it into being something in her skill set when it isn't there.  I don't know if she could summon it even if something horrible happened to one of her children because of it.  We keep thinking she's hit rock bottom, but I don't think she has, and I don't know that even if she did she would have that "pick yourself up by your bootstraps" skill.

 

Some don't.

 

Do I think Kim wants to be an out of control drunk and drug user?  No.  I absolutely do not.

Do I think Kim has what it takes to ever change that?  No, certainly not now, maybe not ever.

 

Do I think Kim puts her loved ones through hell?  Yes.  Absolutely.

Do I think Kim is also in hell?  Yes.  Absolutely.  But that also is part of what drives her to booze and pills. 

 

That's another thing, I do think she probably does need some of the pills, so again, it's a tricky, slippery slope for her. 

Anti-depressants?  Probably needed.  Probably abused. 

Anti-anxiety meds?  Probably needed. Probably abused.

 

Deep therapy is needed, but that probably involves facing childhood issues that she absolutely does not want to face.  Again, it's not a "blame mom" thing, it's a "be realistic and forgive mom" thing.  She's not ready, and at this point, I doubt she ever will be ready.

 

So, what does that leave?  If you can't change the addict, change the way you cope with the addict.  I think we've seen the family try a few things, but what Yours Truly and what I am saying is, sometimes, none of that common stuff will work.  Tough Love is a good catch phrase and maybe even works, at times, with some.  This family though has a public, very public, image, so they have different needs, and different assets.  Neither of us is even saying that our somewhat radical way of coping WOULD WORK, because nothing may work, but the idea behind it does work.  Change yourself, change the way YOU cope with it, release your own happiness being dependent on what the addict does or doesn't do.

 

It's just a very complicated situation, reducing it to simple solutions doesn't work.  Getting angry doesn't work either, because that wrath is nothing compared to the release from that wrath, and her own self loathing, insecurity, and desperation substances give her.

 

ETA

I think the family has tried all of the common solutions.  One after another they've failed.  Rock bottom (arrested, being thrown out of her daughter's wedding) has also failed.  Tough love?  Failing.  Conditional love?  Failing.  Embarrassing her?  Failed.  Get her a job?  Failed.  Therapy?  So far, failed.  Rehabs?  Failed.

 

ETA once more.

The part where I think some of us may disagree is (very simply and not well stated is:) 

The petulance.  Is Kim simply refusing to change out of some sort of petulance or stubbornness or entitlement? 

I don't think so.  I think that, as of now, she simply can't. 

Andy asked Kim if the BH arrest was her rock bottom and she said NO, she just needed a break and was happy the arrest got her that. IMO, Kim has yet to HIT her rock bottom because someone ALWAYS bails her a$$ out, every single time.

 

She's an addict.  Addicts lie.

 

What would really be interesting is if she ever really gets sober.  Something tells me that if she ever, EVER is capable of truthfully facing everything, no longer hiding anything at all, confronting those demons head on?  Would her sisters be more thrilled that Kim is finally healthy, or more horrified at what she might actually expose?

 

Probably a bit from column A and a chunk from column B as well.  Be careful what you wish for.

I think her sisters would be thrilled for Kim to get sober and stay sober and would be fine if things were no longer kept in the dark, at least Kyle would IMO. Also, I think they know that any professional Kim "talked" to would keep what she said between herself and Kim.

 

I get so tired of hearing that Kyle used Kim as her storyline, that Kyle took advantage of Kim, that Kyle lived off Kim as a child because there is NO evidence that any of that is true, NONE. Even if someone thinks/believes what was written in HoH as the bible on the Richards family, that is NEVER said or even implied by the author, nor does he ever say that their mother was abusive towards her daughters, manipulative yes, abusive NO and he never says that she was an alcoholic OR a drug addict. As far as the storyline goes, IMO, Kim FORCED her addiction on everyone, every single cast member including and more so than the others, she forced it on Kyle.

[Satchels of gold]

I was hoping the additional footage of season one would garner some compassion for Kyle . I guess to some people she will always be a bitch eating crackers / shrug /.

[Umbelina]

Well, for me, the only place where I actually have ANY sympathy for Kyle is about her sister's addictions.

 

Not much, but some.

 

Do I think she exploits them, do I think she used/uses Kim?  Yes.  That doesn't mean I don't think it's also been hard on Kyle.  I just don't like her.   I probably wouldn't like her even if she didn't have a sister. 

 

I understand rage toward addicts, believe me, as they said in Good Will Hunting, "I have EXPERIENCE with that."  At some point though, you have to realize that rage is not helping you, and it's certainly not helping anyone else either.  Back to the serenity prayer there.  If there is a fence, I'm the type that will look for a gate first, then think of climbing it, then tunneling under it, cutting through it, blowing it up, building a bridge over it, one after another, whatever it takes. 

 

If you REALLY need to get to the other side, if it's life and death, then you don't give up finding some way to get around that fence in your life.  The easy or common ways don't always work.  Pretty much every single thing I've said here is not about saving Kim, it's about ways to save those who do love her.  I'm really sorry that is not coming through.  I've honestly done my best to explain it.

[izabella]

How do you know this though, really?  I'm not being snarky or mean.  None of us are really in her shoes, we haven't lived her life.  Her public bullshit about wanting to be clean and sober is just that, bullshit.  Doing what mommy said, hiding it.  Deep down inside does she wonder what it would be like if she didn't NEED the drugs and booze?  Does she fool herself at times into thinking she can do it...maybe later?  Does she owe any of the public one damn bit of truth?  She's a fucking mess, and I think she may realize that it's because of her addictions, but what replaces that hit of "feeling good for a moment anyway?"  So far, for her, it's nothing, nothing is as good as that, nothing gives her a release like that.  I agree, she has no idea what it would be like to be sober, she probably hasn't lived drug or booze free since she hit her teens.

 

Oh, Umbelina, I really don't know!  I'm just making wild ass guesses which are entirely IMO!  I have lots of opinions about all kinds of things I know little about, lol. 

 

Does she owe the public the truth?  No. 

 

She puts herself on reality shows, though, so she's literally trying to sell some version of truth to the public.  If nothing else, she invites the opinions of the public by putting herself out there.  Which I also believe is mixed in with her addictions - she has a need for the attention and fans.  She craves the spotlight, but it showcases her issues, so it's a catch-22 for her.

[sistermagpie]

What would really be interesting is if she ever really gets sober.  Something tells me that if she ever, EVER is capable of truthfully facing everything, no longer hiding anything at all, confronting those demons head on?  Would her sisters be more thrilled that Kim is finally healthy, or more horrified at what she might actually expose?

 

 

What would they be afraid of? Seems like as an addict she's plenty ready to spill secrets that would hurt people, but what would she suddenly reveal if she was sober?

[Umbelina]

Her own truths, finally no longer hidden, it could be anything at all.  It could be a Pandora's Box.  I do think until she finally gets down to something REAL though, she hasn't got a hope of getting better. 

 

Since the sister's share some of the same upbringing, at least as far as people involved, there is a chance that there could be things her sisters would prefer didn't come out.

[zoeysmom]

People who are allergic to alcohol don't want to be.  Their strongest desire is to be able to drink normally.     

 

 

 

They are addicted.  That is the only reason.  It is not about avoiding being sober, it is about resisting the pull toward it that takes tremendous strength and commitment to conquer.  

No truer words were ever written.  It is like the kid who is allergic to strawberries, and tomatoes and peanuts.  They so want to fit in.  Kim doesn't understand that many including family members can imbibe and be okay.

[sistermagpie]

Her own truths, finally no longer hidden, it could be anything at all.  It could be a Pandora's Box.  I do think until she finally gets down to something REAL though, she hasn't got a hope of getting better.

 

 

Her own truths like what? You mean like that their mother was terrible? That she wishes she was an only child? That she saw her mother murder somebody?

I know she could come up with any number of things that would be upsetting to them, but if there’s something that’s been hurting Kim for years they’d probably ultimately want to deal with it.

[hoosiermom]

I have always said celebrities are at a disadvantage when it comes to sobriety. They are often enabled to death. My loved ones allowed me to hit bottom but were there to help me get clean and sober. Kim doesn't get sober because she doesn't have to. Quite sad really.

[Umbelina]

We can speculate, but that's all it would be.  I'm just saying, they share many of the same people in their lives.  They are all very accustomed to "keeping our secrets" as Kyle's said a few times.

 

With Kim?  I think a couple of realistic suppositions could be something that gave her this very low self esteem, which manifests as a super bombastic personality when she's high.  It could be un-faced truths or resentments having to do with parents, it could be about when she started on pills or booze, it could be abuse, physical or sexual, it could be anything really.  My point is that Kathy's spawn likes to write their own stories, and being in the public eye they don't want dirt aired.  Nobody has a perfect family, and with the stuff they dealt with, including the mobster, such early marriages, Hollywood expectations and the rest, it might be, COULD be, something they don't want out, or even to face.  Other ideas are little Kathy's drug use, and the wild and woolly heydays of past.  

 

As I said it could be anything at all.  I think there is more to Kim than physical addiction, it seems to have a very strong emotional edge to it all, and digging up your own old emotions doesn't happen in a vacuum.

[WireWrap]

We can speculate, but that's all it would be.  I'm just saying, they share many of the same people in their lives.  They are all very accustomed to "keeping our secrets" as Kyle's said a few times.

 

With Kim?  I think a couple of realistic suppositions could be something that gave her this very low self esteem, which manifests as a super bombastic personality when she's high.  It could be un-faced truths or resentments having to do with parents, it could be about when she started on pills or booze, it could be abuse, physical or sexual, it could be anything really.  My point is that Kathy's spawn likes to write their own stories, and being in the public eye they don't want dirt aired.  Nobody has a perfect family, and with the stuff they dealt with, including the mobster, such early marriages, Hollywood expectations and the rest, it might be, COULD be, something they don't want out, or even to face.  Other ideas are little Kathy's drug use, and the wild and woolly heydays of past.  

 

As I said it could be anything at all.  I think there is more to Kim than physical addiction, it seems to have a very strong emotional edge to it all, and digging up your own old emotions doesn't happen in a vacuum.

No one wants their "dirt aired", it doesn't matter if it is local or national, on TV or through the lips of the town gossip NO ONE wants that to happen to themselves OR their families. AND most people try to underscore things that are embarrassing or painful in their lives. The Richard sisters are NOT unique to this, it is what/how most people are. My parents raised us to "Not air our dirty laundry" to ANYONE, be they other family members, friends or strangers. LOL

 

Kim's psych problems may just be something she was born with, something that has been in the family but kept quiet. Psych problems are not always caused by some external traumatic experience, sometimes it is as simple as genetics.

[Umbelina]

That's true, and that's one thing that many addicts and their friends or families sometimes have to face.  Get healthy but out secrets, or keep them buried and struggle with sobriety. 

 

I know one addict that finally got healthy, but it involved finally admitting to childhood sexual abuse from her stepfather, and it tore her family apart.  Was she finally able to get clean for real?  Yes, but her body was a wreck from years of drugs, and her family really struggled, denial, anger, until finally two cousins came forward and admitted it happened to them from the same man as well.  He was pretty high up in the church, her mother was elderly, there were several siblings, it was horrific for all of them.  As I said, facing truths doesn't happen in a vacuum.  It usually impacts others as well.

 

I don't think Kim's addiction is merely physical though.  I could be wrong of course.  Her depression and anxiety, which are both obvious to a blind person, lead me to think it's also emotional.  So what started it?  What triggers did she have?  Who gave her the first drink or the first pill?  Was it at home, at her sister's, at work filming?  Why did she marry as soon as she possibly could and then divorce so soon after?  Her life has been unusual, from start to finish.  Was it that pressure or adulation from fame?  All of the above?  Again, pure speculation, but yes, I hope for all of them that someday she is able to face it all clearly and cope with the things that led her to this.  All of them.

 

I do think that it's hard for secrets to be shared for everyone, but I think it would be even more difficult when your family is famous, and every tabloid around might pick up on it and start writing stories.  There are already horror stories out there about the famous confessing things in rehab or AA that someone sells for the money.  After all?  Addicts usually want money, and that's a bigger danger for celebs than your average plumber attending one of those meetings.  I think Kim is well aware of that, so rehabs are doubly useless for her.

 

I do hope the judge throws her ass in jail though, and nullifies her community service.

Edited March 10, 2016 by Umbelina

[WireWrap]

That's true, and that's one thing that many addicts and their friends or families sometimes have to face.  Get healthy but out secrets, or keep them buried and struggle with sobriety. 

 

I know one addict that finally got healthy, but it involved finally admitting to childhood sexual abuse from her stepfather, and it tore her family apart.  Was she finally able to get clean for real?  Yes, but her body was a wreck from years of drugs, and her family really struggled, denial, anger, until finally two cousins came forward and admitted it happened to them from the same man as well.  He was pretty high up in the church, her mother was elderly, there were several siblings, it was horrific for all of them.  As I said, facing truths doesn't happen in a vacuum.  It usually impacts others as well.

 

I don't think Kim's addiction is merely physical though.  I could be wrong of course.  Her depression and anxiety, which are both obvious to a blind person, lead me to think it's also emotional.  So what started it?  What triggers did she have?  Who gave her the first drink or the first pill?  Was it at home, at her sister's, at work filming?  Why did she marry as soon as she possibly could and then divorce so soon after?  Her life has been unusual, from start to finish.  Was it that pressure or adulation from fame?  All of the above?  Again, pure speculation, but yes, I hope for all of them that someday she is able to face it all clearly and cope with the things that led her to this.  All of them.

 

I do think that it's hard for secrets to be shared for everyone, but I think it would be even more difficult when your family is famous, and every tabloid around might pick up on it and start writing stories.  There are already horror stories out there about the famous confessing things in rehab or AA that someone sells for the money.  After all?  Addicts usually want money, and that's a bigger danger for celebs than your average plumber attending one of those meetings.  I think Kim is well aware of that, so rehabs are doubly useless for her.

 

I do hope the judge throws her ass in jail though, and nullifies her community service.

We don't know if there is anything more "scandalous" beyond what has already been written in the book HoH. And as far as keeping family secrets buried, Kim is already a liability in that department. IMO, she has already 'shared" some of those secrets with Brandi who tries to use them as weapons against Kyle and she doesn't do it to help, protect or to even defend Kim, she does it out of an unnatural HATRED for Kyle even though she knows that any "secret" told by Kim is questionable at best because it is spill/shared when she, Kim, is drunk/high, not when she is sober/clean.

 

Kim ran with a group of child/teen actors that were know partiers, some died/OD young because of it and I suspect it started there and then. Who is to say that she was depressed/had anxiety problems BEFORE she became an addict. Addiction can create this, especially long term use like in Kim's case. Yes, Kim was taught to marry into uber wealth and have lots of kids by her mother and she did it. Her marriage to Monty ended because SHE cheated on him as she did her second husband as well.

 

Kim could easily go to a private counselor/sessions/therapy to protect her privacy, her family has the means to make that happen and I would bet my bottom dollar they have done this and are continuing to do this.

 

I don't think jail is the answer, IMO, doing the community labor IS better for her, especially since she is adamantly against it. That sort of embarrassment, say picking up garbage in an orange vest on the side of the road, just might be THE wake up call she needs. Nothing else has worked so far, so it is worth the shot.

[Umbelina]

I say jail because she lied to the court, which offered her the relatively easy community service.  She should face consequences legally for that.

 

That friend I talked about earlier who did succeed with NA and AA, but who then bored the shit out of me because every conversation quickly went back to one of the steps? 

 

He was in a serious program, and the first thing they did was cut off all contact from every single person who had been in his life before, even those, like me, who was completely against drugs and tried to help him get clean.  That lasted for nearly a year for him.  After that, working the steps meant being very honest  about everything, all the time.  His program insisted on complete honesty with every person, and his mother became so angry that she didn't speak to him for several years.

Others of course, he never let back in his life, including every active user, and frankly, he didn't even want to be around social drinkers, his sobriety was too important to him.

 

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
This step requires self-examination that can be uncomfortable, but honesty is essential in this process. The key is to identify any areas of past regret, embarrassment, guilt or anger.

 

It also says not to hurt others, but in some cases, that's a balance impossible to achieve, especially if the others are part of the reason for your addictions. 

[Yours Truly]

Umbelina your posts are giving me LIFE!!!

 

I love the thoughtfulness you've put in your analysis. A lot of it mirrors my own thinking of Kims situation. Things that I've noticed and avenues that I feel are really what's at the crux of a lot of it. I love that you don't just wrap up her actions with just the show and the extremes it's obviously designed to create and show us. It's such a bigger animal than what the show has revealed to us. It's refreshing to hear a point of view that isn't littered with how she can EASILY do this that and the other without taking into account how serious, low long and how strong of a hold this addiction seems to be on her. I too believe there's much more to it than a lot of the superficial scandals that arose from filming the show (i.e. LisaR trauma, Kyle's ready for her close up angst, Brandi's feud). Being very aware about the negatives of the 80's child star era I'm inclined to agree with your assessment that it could have easily stemmed as far back as all that and boy that's a long time to be struggling. Here's to hoping she finds some semblance of peace. Many of her peers from that era never managed it.

 

Dana Plato

Todd Bridges

Corey Haim

Corey Feldman

Danny Bonaduche

Leif Garrett

McKenzie Phillips

 

To name a few.

 

I also agree with your comment about putting her in jail. I do think she shouldn't get away with any legal ramifications of her behaviors. That would be going too far. Do I think she needs to be put in the slammer every other day no but she shouldn't get any special treatment because of her celebrity.

Edited March 10, 2016 by Yours Truly

[Yours Truly]

I say jail because she lied to the court, which offered her the relatively easy community service.  She should face consequences legally for that.

 

That friend I talked about earlier who did succeed with NA and AA, but who then bored the shit out of me because every conversation quickly went back to one of the steps? 

 

He was in a serious program, and the first thing they did was cut off all contact from every single person who had been in his life before, even those, like me, who was completely against drugs and tried to help him get clean.  That lasted for nearly a year for him.  After that, working the steps meant being very honest  about everything, all the time.  His program insisted on complete honesty with every person, and his mother became so angry that she didn't speak to him for several years.

Others of course, he never let back in his life, including every active user, and frankly, he didn't even want to be around social drinkers, his sobriety was too important to him.

 

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

This step requires self-examination that can be uncomfortable, but honesty is essential in this process. The key is to identify any areas of past regret, embarrassment, guilt or anger.

 

It also says not to hurt others, but in some cases, that's a balance impossible to achieve, especially if the others are part of the reason for your addictions. 

A LOT goes into getting clean. It also means that those around you are up for the punishment as well. This whole, everyone stands around Kim like teflon while she apologizes and takes her lumps is just so unrealistic to me so I get why she's always got one foot out of the door when she in her version of recovery. She can't truly recover if she's not allowed to express what sort of things cause her to want to escape from reality. At this point it's the high itself of course but let's be honest she's going to need to be able to express her resentments and anger too but that's not part of the plan for her. Anything that would imply those around her aren't suffering victims is a slap in the face for what they have done for her. Catch 22.

 

Besides the pull I can believe that she has triggers all around that are brought on by those she loves but she can't admit that because then that's her blaming someone but shit if that's what's going through her mind the moment she feels she needs a hit then that's what it is. How on earth is she ever gonna to get where she needs to be if she can't even express what her truths are regarding how her addiction takes hold of her and the reasons why?

[ParkCirclegirl]

I finally watched the WWHL with Kim and all I can say is I remembered instantly why I cannot watch her, the odd twitchy way about her is hard to watch. 

[Yours Truly]

I finally watched the WWHL with Kim and all I can say is I remembered instantly why I cannot watch her, the odd twitchy way about her is hard to watch. 

She does have a very odd way about her doesn't she? Awkward, not quite flowing. So uncomfortable and unsure. It's kind of painful to watch actually.  The social anxiety just drips off of her. Must be terrible.

Edited March 10, 2016 by Yours Truly

[zoeysmom]

I believe what sets Kim apart from others in recovery is she has yet to internalize that she would receive a  lot more support if she acknowledged that her drinking behavior was so obnoxious that she alienated people and not just those close to her.  At this point she doesn't need to have an excuse for why she can't drink, she just needs to see that her personality is not enhanced by her denial and argumentative nature.   Once she internalizes that perhaps the way she remembers things when she was drinking may be skewed, the closer she will be to working her way back be trusted by her friends and family.  A perfect example is  the goddamn house. Instead of counting Kyle's money, maybe she should look back and remember the great trips she took with her kids from the proceeds of her mother's house.  Kim did a good thing she provided comfort and care for her  dying mother.  All of that gets lost when she is rewriting the history of the settlement of her mother's estate.

 

Kim suffers from rumination, she talks about Monty and what  great time SHE had watching movies with him.  I think I understand why Monty didn't always come back at night.  It was his time to be taken care of and not Kim's.  The guy was terminal and he wanted to be social, not going to happen watching movies and imbibing in mood altering substances in Kim's bedroom.  There are times where she is totally swept away in all the perks that came with being a child hood star.  I wish she could express those without having to continually talk about her great sacrifices.  Not riding a school bus or going on a field trip is not devastating.   It is like listening to someone  talk about always being picked last for softball.  It happened and move forward, it was over 40 years ago.  

 

I do think Kim needs to always be aware of why she drinks.  My guess is she is probably anxious and drinking makes her less so.  Obviously it isn't peer pressure at this point.   Less important is why she started it is now all about why she can't.  Perhaps is unable to work in show business cause the pressure makes her want to drink.  It may be a simple as admitting this and finding something else to fill her time and bank account.  Kim seems to enjoy children perhaps she could start or become employed by a fabulous school for children who want to perform.  I think once Kim becomes a grandmother it will be pretty impossible to tear her away from her grandbabies but she has to be sober to be a part of their lives.   Maybe her family needs to give their blessings to explore other options.  I have no idea whether they have or have not.

 

Another thing is Kim seems almost omnipotent when it comes to being in drinking situations and then wants to count others' drinks.  That is on them and there are people who can drink socially and even a bit too much at times that do not suffer the consequences Kim does when she drinks.  She needs to listen to Jennifer.  That is not something many can handle immediately out of rehab.   I am just saying no, to the cast not be allowed to drink when Kim is involved.  The last thing Kim needs is special accommodations.

[sistermagpie]

Kim ran with a group of child/teen actors that were know partiers, some died/OD young because of it and I suspect it started there and then. Who is to say that she was depressed/had anxiety problems BEFORE she became an addict.

 

 

Totally speculation, but it would make sense to me if her issues was that she was incredibly special as a kid and thought that was just something that would always be there. She quit acting when she aged out of the roles she was so popular in rather than transition into adult acting (where she probably wouldn't have done half as well) and now chases the old feeling artificially, having started partying as a teen. But who knows?

 

Regarding her going to a real tell-all counseling therapy, that could very easily be hard on the family (as could her turning into one of those 12 steppers who are insufferable and boring--they definitely exist) but at this point that's not on the table anyway. Her family just seems to want her in recovery (if only because when she's there somebody's keeping watch on her) and if she chose one of those places that's where she'd be, but she doesn't want to be there yet. I don't see any expectation in Kim's life that she stand there and apologize and take her lumps while nobody else has to do anything--we've seen Kim demand apologies from her main betrayer, Kyle, and we've seen Kyle have to work to get back even a small measure of Kim's trust on camera, so the other version, where Kim apologizes and wears a hairshirt while nobody else has to own up to their own flaws isn't even really being offered, much less forced on her. Kim didn't even have to apologize for Game Night - she's not the person who always has to apologize.

 

Kim's spent so much time on camera explaining how other people have let her down I think that's why people assume that real therapy would focus more on things about herself since it's the thing she doesn't seem to have on the tip of her tongue at all times. Sure there might be an even bigger thing where Kim's the victim--like a family covering up her being abused--but it could also come back to Kim not being the family star anymore. 

[Wings]

I sure hope she doesn't come back next season.  

 

Her appearance on WWHL showed that her personality is the same drinking or not.  One is angry the other not.  Both are flighty and annoying.  

 

I think maybe she was sober that night but my guess is she still drinks but in the privacy of her own home when no one is watching or privately with Brandi.  I don't care.  I don't care why she drinks, either.  I don't care if she is sober or not.  I don't like her.  She offers nothing of interest to this show.  

 

AND Kyle cannot be herself when she is around.  I like Kyle and LisaV's relationship and Kim will skew that vibe.

Edited March 10, 2016 by wings707

[Yours Truly]

Totally speculation, but it would make sense to me if her issues was that she was incredibly special as a kid and thought that was just something that would always be there. She quit acting when she aged out of the roles she was so popular in rather than transition into adult acting (where she probably wouldn't have done half as well) and now chases the old feeling artificially, having started partying as a teen. But who knows?

 

Regarding her going to a real tell-all counseling therapy, that could very easily be hard on the family (as could her turning into one of those 12 steppers who are insufferable and boring--they definitely exist) but at this point that's not on the table anyway. Her family just seems to want her in recovery (if only because when she's there somebody's keeping watch on her) and if she chose one of those places that's where she'd be, but she doesn't want to be there yet. I don't see any expectation in Kim's life that she stand there and apologize and take her lumps while nobody else has to do anything--we've seen Kim demand apologies from her main betrayer, Kyle, and we've seen Kyle have to work to get back even a small measure of Kim's trust on camera, so the other version, where Kim apologizes and wears a hairshirt while nobody else has to own up to their own flaws isn't even really being offered, much less forced on her. Kim didn't even have to apologize for Game Night - she's not the person who always has to apologize.

 

Kim's spent so much time on camera explaining how other people have let her down I think that's why people assume that real therapy would focus more on things about herself since it's the thing she doesn't seem to have on the tip of her tongue at all times. Sure there might be an even bigger thing where Kim's the victim--like a family covering up her being abused--but it could also come back to Kim not being the family star anymore. 

What we see on camera isn't all the information. I can't possibly come to any absolutes about what is expected of Kim when the cameras aren't rolling. How many passes she has or hasn't been given behind closed doors. From what I have seen of how Kyle handles Kim I don't think I'm all that far off with my assessment about certain things. Of course we will never know but I do have my gut feelings on the matter. That's all it is. And a really good insight at least IMO. :-)

[Satchels of gold]

I think people are projecting there own feelings about addiction on to Kim. She has never said or done anything that leads me to beleive she is guilt ridden and remorseful. I have a plethora of addicts in my family and I Was raised surrounded by them. Screwed up, but the kindest most sensitive people you could ever meet. I don't see any of that with Kim. Season one and two I was the captain of team Kim. I just assumed she was like the other addicts in my life, almost too sensitive for the world. Somewhere in season three it dawned on me I wasn't seeing her as she was. She has shown herself to be a selfish, miserable woman with little regard for anyone but herself.

Edited March 10, 2016 by nc socialworker

[Sincerely Yours]

Perceptions vary. No one direction completely defines. Projecting or no projecting. Speculation will always be a part of the equation as well as seeing actual footage in different ways so even referring to aired items doesn't necessary confirm any one position. But one things for sure there is way more to Kim's addictions than reality tv, social media, and headlines could ever shed light on.

[sistermagpie]

What we see on camera isn't all the information. I can't possibly come to any absolutes about what is expected of Kim when the cameras aren't rolling.

 

 

Sure--but what we've got on TV and in the press is all we've got to go on and it's pretty consistent. 

[WireWrap]

I am not sure what to say about this video other than "BIZZARE"! Shame on Andy for getting Kim to do this and shame on Kim's agent for allowing it.

 

http://tamaratattles.com/2016/03/10/what-do-you-think-about-lisa-vanderpump-tramona/

[Vicky8675309]

Why the hell do they have Kim with a turtle on tv babbling about Erika being great? Are they testing the water to see how the public feels about Kim being on next season? If so then I vote NO KIM! Please stop punishing me by having Kim on tv. I feel sorry for the turtle.

[Wings]

I am not sure what to say about this video other than "BIZZARE"! Shame on Andy for getting Kim to do this and shame on Kim's agent for allowing it.

 

http://tamaratattles.com/2016/03/10/what-do-you-think-about-lisa-vanderpump-tramona/

 

 

Allowing the turtle to be handled like that bothers me.  Tramona was scared.  

[Satchels of gold]

That makes me mad at Andy, he ok'd that on the website knowing it made Kim look stupid. I don't like that.

Edited March 10, 2016 by nc socialworker

[Vicky8675309]

Why are some people thinking Kim is hiding some deep dark secret? I think her and others like her (Paris, Paris's brother) are the family secret (the drug & alcohol abuse). If there is some secret then either deal with it or don't...however masking it with alcohol & drug abuse isn't working (contributed to getting fired, going to jail, etc) so that coping mechanism (if that is the excuse people want to use to explain her substance abuse problems with) has failed and is now causing more problems. So deal with both issues or deal with the substance abuse issues and find another coping mechanism for the first issue.

 

Let's pretend she has an underlying issue and let's pretend it is child abuse or child molestation. That is horrible however it is not uncommon and people can cope and still function. Sure some people can't function but I don't think that is the norm. Also she functioned well enough to get married and have children so why can she no longer function....because one or more of her coping mechanisms stopped working and/or became a problem. It seems to have spiraled out of control in direct correlation to her lack of control over her substance abuse. Getting clean/sober is hard but it is doable if someone wants it and is willing to put the work in to make it work and to realize there is no quick fix but you have to change your life style and be willing to do it and that it will be a constant process. But why should Kim do that if everyone is going to enable her....

 

More likely there isn't any deep secret and she just happens to have an addictive personality and was partying hard and it spiraled into what it is. Sometimes there aren't any obvious reasons or hidden secrets. Maybe it was a combination of variables but you can only change yourself and Kim has to want to change. Why change if you are rewarded (even if it is just maintenance of the status quo) for your destructive behavior.

 

How can the family have peace of mind if they set Kim up in a house with food, cleaner, driver, etc if she is still using? They will still be worried about overdose, death, liver failure, respiratory failure, etc...and they contributed to it.

 

Kim's kids are adults, right? So the family can cut ties to Kim and let her kids know they will be there for them but not Kim...not until Kim is clean and sober. That is hard to do but I don't think they tried that whereas they have tried the free vacation method I see described elsewhere in this thread. Maybe not to the point of a driver but pretty damn close to it.

 

Kim's "reasons" may just be figments of her imagination or delusions...she still thinks Kyle stole her house when that did not happen.

Edited March 10, 2016 by Vicky8675309

[kokapetl]

I think Kim's career died at the worst possible time for a young woman who had, up until that point, always been successful. She defaulted into washed up child actor junkie syndrome. She's either had remarkable luck with her wealthy baby daddies, or the indoctrination by Large Marge was very successful.

Edited March 10, 2016 by Kokapetl

[goofygirl]

Maybe poor widdle Kimmie could get a job at the turtle race place that the VanderPump Rules fools attended? She could be a "turtle valet".  Caught some of WWHL, but never really saw her explanation of the Target shoplifting.  Just heard the BS about the Beverly Hills Hotel. WAS there an explanation?

[Umbelina]

Because people with severe alcohol and drug problems often DO have unresolved issues, and they often DO hide them.  If you don't find out what compels you into such destructive behavior, how can you ever really cure it? 

 

Also, people really do have different skill sets. 

Some people find courage pretty easy, some find that in a bottle of booze or pills.

Some people have strong will power, but others simply don't have that in their arsenal.

(on and on with this)

 

As far as her many marriages and children?  Where is there even one successful marriage in Kim's life?  Why did she get out of her mother's house and show biz as soon as her age allowed, marry and start churning out babies?  At 18 or 19 years old, a time most kids are either getting their first jobs, or going to college?

 

There are just so many signs and clues that Kim has been struggling for most of her life.  She may never find what it takes to get better, so her family needs to learn how to cope with that, for themselves, not for her.

 

Kyle even said that their mother always told them to hide their secrets, and, great progress for Kyle, even said, "maybe that's not the best way..." or words similar to that.  Of course, Kyle meant exposing all of Kim's misdeeds, but still, progress in knocking that pedestal down a bit.

[MatildaMoody]

 

Once she internalizes that perhaps the way she remembers things when she was drinking may be skewed, the closer she will be to working her way back be trusted by her friends and family.  A perfect example is  the goddamn house. Instead of counting Kyle's money, maybe she should look back and remember the great trips she took with her kids from the proceeds of her mother's house.  Kim did a good thing she provided comfort and care for her  dying mother.  All of that gets lost when she is rewriting the history of the settlement of her mother's estate.

This really reminds me of Poker night. Kim followed Kyle into the bathroom and proceeded to talk about how she took a pill. Kyle tried to get her to cover her mic and Kim wouldn't. Then, Kim is suddenly angry because she feels like Kyle is outing her in some way and is pouting to Brandi about it. What Kim thought happened was that Kyle was somehow inviting the cameras into her relapse, when it was actually Kim coming to Kyle with her relapse. That was probably why Kim immediately assumed that Kyle saying she was embarrassed had something to do with Kim. When in actuality Kyle was talking about being embarrassed about how bad she did at poker. 

 

The same was true of the original Game Night. Kim's perception of that night was that Brandi had been the aggressor when Brandi had been putting up with Kim's childish digs and refusal to acknowledge her as being on the same team the majority of the night. And, that perception led Kim to stubbornly refuse to apologize and even try to get her daughter to attack Brandi. I think the most sane thing anyone has ever said on this show came from (I can't believe I am typing this) Brandi. Kim was telling Brandi that her daughter was angry with Brandi and wanted to give Brandi a piece of her mind, and Brandi calmly replied, "I don't fight with children." It's hard to believe that she was once so reasonable. 

[Satchels of gold]

N/m

Edited March 11, 2016 by nc socialworker

[WireWrap]

Maybe poor widdle Kimmie could get a job at the turtle race place that the VanderPump Rules fools attended? She could be a "turtle valet".  Caught some of WWHL, but never really saw her explanation of the Target shoplifting.  Just heard the BS about the Beverly Hills Hotel. WAS there an explanation?

She said she could not talk about because it was still in the courts. Kim is fighting the court ordered community service/labor hours she was given as part of that sentence.

[Vicky8675309]

Because people with severe alcohol and drug problems often DO have unresolved issues, and they often DO hide them.  If you don't find out what compels you into such destructive behavior, how can you ever really cure it? 

 

Also, people really do have different skill sets. 

Some people find courage pretty easy, some find that in a bottle of booze or pills.

Some people have strong will power, but others simply don't have that in their arsenal.

(on and on with this)

 

As far as her many marriages and children?  Where is there even one successful marriage in Kim's life?  Why did she get out of her mother's house and show biz as soon as her age allowed, marry and start churning out babies?  At 18 or 19 years old, a time most kids are either getting their first jobs, or going to college?

 

There are just so many signs and clues that Kim has been struggling for most of her life.  She may never find what it takes to get better, so her family needs to learn how to cope with that, for themselves, not for her.

 

Kyle even said that their mother always told them to hide their secrets, and, great progress for Kyle, even said, "maybe that's not the best way..." or words similar to that.  Of course, Kyle meant exposing all of Kim's misdeeds, but still, progress in knocking that pedestal down a bit.

 

Even you say "often" but not always. I wonder if it is often, sometimes, occasionally, rarely.... It's a disease. I think she has an addictive personality and when partying with friends, she couldn't control it and it turned into a lifestyle. No big hidden secret/trauma and even then, so what, that is life and just an excuse. Gambling addicts don't have to find some hidden secret to get over gambling. Plus many people have trauma and don't turn to substance abuse. Kim stopped maturing mentally when her substance abuse got out of control. But she can mature mentally when she is clean/sober. She can learn new skill sets and coping mechanisms if she wants...but she has to want it...why want it if she gets her way (the easy way out). 

 

Let's say she self medicated anxiety/depression with substance abuse. There are medicines for those underlying reasons. 

 

All those failed marriages that are being cited as signs of her struggling are signs of her struggling with substance abuse as it spirals more and more out of control. Plenty of woman have babies when they hit puberty and in their teens and late teens and go on to lead productive lives and these are often women without all the advantages and resources available to Kim.

 

Kyle exposed all of Kim's misdeeds...what? I didn't see that. I saw her confront her intoxicated sister and reach the point that she had had enough and got mad and called her an alcoholic. Good for her...stop covering for the drunk asshole who has been a pain in the ass. Maybe Kim will finally get help. Too bad it didn't work and Kim didn't want help. I think Kyle had enough and just exploded with anger and I get her. Shit, Kim was pitching a fit in the lobby and had even started shit with the producer. Everyone felt so sorry for Kim. I didn't...Kim is toxic. There are people suffering much worse hardships in life and have been through worse than Kim and her entitled selfish outlook on life. 

 

If there are any secrets I suspect they are all about covering up alcohol and drug use--Kathy, Rick, Kim, maybe the mom...who knows but I don't think it's anything scandalous imo.

[kokapetl]

Even you say "often" but not always. I wonder if it is often, sometimes, occasionally, rarely.... It's a disease. I think she has an addictive personality and when partying with friends, she couldn't control it and it turned into a lifestyle. No big hidden secret/trauma and even then, so what, that is life and just an excuse. Gambling addicts don't have to find some hidden secret to get over gambling. Plus many people have trauma and don't turn to substance abuse. Kim stopped maturing mentally when her substance abuse got out of control. But she can mature mentally when she is clean/sober. She can learn new skill sets and coping mechanisms if she wants...but she has to want it...why want it if she gets her way (the easy way out).

Let's say she self medicated anxiety/depression with substance abuse. There are medicines for those underlying reasons.

All those failed marriages that are being cited as signs of her struggling are signs of her struggling with substance abuse as it spirals more and more out of control. Plenty of woman have babies when they hit puberty and in their teens and late teens and go on to lead productive lives and these are often women without all the advantages and resources available to Kim.

Kyle exposed all of Kim's misdeeds...what? I didn't see that. I saw her confront her intoxicated sister and reach the point that she had had enough and got mad and called her an alcoholic. Good for her...stop covering for the drunk asshole who has been a pain in the ass. Maybe Kim will finally get help. Too bad it didn't work and Kim didn't want help. I think Kyle had enough and just exploded with anger and I get her. Shit, Kim was pitching a fit in the lobby and had even started shit with the producer. Everyone felt so sorry for Kim. I didn't...Kim is toxic. There are people suffering much worse hardships in life and have been through worse than Kim and her entitled selfish outlook on life.

If there are any secrets I suspect they are all about covering up alcohol and drug use--Kathy, Rick, Kim, maybe the mom...who knows but I don't think it's anything scandalous imo.

In other words, a personality disorder of some sort. Maladaptive coping mechanisms that cause difficulties in cognition, emotiveness, interpersonal functioning, or impulse control. Listed in DSM-5 and ICD-10. I'd guess borderline personality disorder for Kim.

[WireWrap]

Because people with severe alcohol and drug problems often DO have unresolved issues, and they often DO hide them.  If you don't find out what compels you into such destructive behavior, how can you ever really cure it? 

 

Also, people really do have different skill sets. 

Some people find courage pretty easy, some find that in a bottle of booze or pills.

Some people have strong will power, but others simply don't have that in their arsenal.

(on and on with this)

 

As far as her many marriages and children?  Where is there even one successful marriage in Kim's life?  Why did she get out of her mother's house and show biz as soon as her age allowed, marry and start churning out babies?  At 18 or 19 years old, a time most kids are either getting their first jobs, or going to college?

 

There are just so many signs and clues that Kim has been struggling for most of her life.  She may never find what it takes to get better, so her family needs to learn how to cope with that, for themselves, not for her.

 

Kyle even said that their mother always told them to hide their secrets, and, great progress for Kyle, even said, "maybe that's not the best way..." or words similar to that.  Of course, Kyle meant exposing all of Kim's misdeeds, but still, progress in knocking that pedestal down a bit.

Kim dropped out of HS and she has said that it was her dream to marry/have kids, it was what SHE wanted. I think Kim dreamed of being a stay at home mom and there was/is nothing wrong with that. Besides, when Kim got married, it wasn't that uncommon to get married at that age (late teens/early twenties), I believe that more young women got married at that age than not during that time period, I was 1 of them as was my sister and both of my SILs.

[sistermagpie]

I believe that more young women got married at that age than not during that time period, I was 1 of them as was my sister and both of my SILs.

 

 

One of them was Kyle--didn't she also have her first marriage and baby very young? When did Little Kathy get married? It seems like something their mom encouraged. I wonder if she basically felt she could make money off them as kids but didn't have any faith in their ability to be grown up actresses or movie stars. (And she wasn't necessarily wrong there, I guess.)

[Umbelina]

Yes, the all married young.  Little Kathy was the only one who didn't have a baby well short of 9 months.  Actually, their mother was usually pregnant when she married as well, except for the marriage after menopause was looming.

 

I find that pretty odd, that all 3 of the children married wealthy men while they were still teenagers.  None went to college or found work. 

 

Yes, I do believe that Kim has deep seated issues, and those issues lead to her substance abuse, and until they are dealt with, she'll never get better.  What they are?  Most are guesses, some good ones given her upbringing, later actions, and eye witness statements about they way they were raised and what their mother was like.

[WireWrap]

We can speculate, but that's all it would be.  I'm just saying, they share many of the same people in their lives.  They are all very accustomed to "keeping our secrets" as Kyle's said a few times.

 

With Kim?  I think a couple of realistic suppositions could be something that gave her this very low self esteem, which manifests as a super bombastic personality when she's high.  It could be un-faced truths or resentments having to do with parents, it could be about when she started on pills or booze, it could be abuse, physical or sexual, it could be anything really.  My point is that Kathy's spawn likes to write their own stories, and being in the public eye they don't want dirt aired.  Nobody has a perfect family, and with the stuff they dealt with, including the mobster, such early marriages, Hollywood expectations and the rest, it might be, COULD be, something they don't want out, or even to face.  Other ideas are little Kathy's drug use, and the wild and woolly heydays of past.  

 

As I said it could be anything at all.  I think there is more to Kim than physical addiction, it seems to have a very strong emotional edge to it all, and digging up your own old emotions doesn't happen in a vacuum.

Who knows?!? LOL It could be as simple as that she is just a nasty self entitled jerk that just has to have everything on her terms and will settle for nothing less or as complicated because something traumatic happened to her when she was young. I doubt that we will ever know and I don't think we should know, public persona or not. I keep coming back to the same conclusion and that is that Kim needs to stay off TV in/on any type of "reality" show. She needs to stick to campy shows like "Sharknado" if she wants to keep acting and keep her private life out of the press, out of the courts and, as I said, off of all reality based TV shows.

[LIMOM]

One of them was Kyle--didn't she also have her first marriage and baby very young? When did Little Kathy get married? It seems like something their mom encouraged. I wonder if she basically felt she could make money off them as kids but didn't have any faith in their ability to be grown up actresses or movie stars. (And she wasn't necessarily wrong there, I guess.)

Big Kathy raised her dsughters that way.

"Sealing the deal " comes to mind..,,

IMHO, big Kathy was a social climber in the worst way, the original PMK.

Andy Cohen was again showed what a fucking asshole and women hater, he is.

Wtf is this turtle video all about????

Anderson cooper is becoming more and more suspect in my eyes.,...

He is either a total asshole like Andrew or he is a total social misfit.

[zoeysmom]

One of them was Kyle--didn't she also have her first marriage and baby very young? When did Little Kathy get married? It seems like something their mom encouraged. I wonder if she basically felt she could make money off them as kids but didn't have any faith in their ability to be grown up actresses or movie stars. (And she wasn't necessarily wrong there, I guess.)

I think like all moms she wanted her daughters to find love, be happy and be secure.  Kathy has been married for 37 years and married at 20 and had Paris at 22.  Kim married at 21 and had Brooke at 21, Kyle married at 19 and had Farrah at 19.  Kyle married for the second time at 27 and has been married 20 years.  At the tail end of the one on one with Kim Richards there is a clip where Kim said she is like her mom and it is all about her kids.  Kyle and Kathy's husbands both built up incredibly successful businesses, Kim's husbands were a trust fund guy and a guy who inherited the family oil business.

 

Big Kathy was always very confident in her daughters abilities and talents just as the sisters are of each others. Big Kathy in fact wanted Kim to keep acting and Kim did not want to continue. Kim said long before RHOBH that once she saw her daughter she wanted to be a fulltime mom.  The one thing I can say about Kyle and Kim is they both speak highly of each other as mothers. 

 

 

 

Who knows?!? LOL It could be as simple as that she is just a nasty self entitled jerk that just has to have everything on her terms and will settle for nothing less or as complicated because something traumatic happened to her when she was young. I doubt that we will ever know and I don't think we should know, public persona or not. I keep coming back to the same conclusion and that is that Kim needs to stay off TV in/on any type of "reality" show. She needs to stick to campy shows like "Sharknado" if she wants to keep acting and keep her private life out of the press, out of the courts and, as I said, off of all reality based TV shows.

I always get the impression that Kim is in this old days of Hollywood fog where the studios protected their stars.  I get what Kyle was saying about sweeping under the rug-her mom just chose not to discuss Kim's drinking and did what she thought was best  for Kim.  The last few years of her life, Big Kathy had Kim move in with her and then to a home very close by.   When Kim talks of traumatic experiences she speaks of the murder of her boyfriend while talking on the phone to him.  For Kim, coming out of a second marriage with three very young children (a newborn and one year old) I think that was a pretty defining moment in her life.  I think Kim has been pretty upfront about the trauma in her life.  I am certain the death of Monty and most likely just his terminal illness was a major traumatic moment for Kim.

 

I agree Kim needs to go back to script acting or move on to something that doesn't involve her personal life being on film.

Edited March 11, 2016 by zoeysmom

[LIMOM]

^^

Lol.

Isn't it a bit early on the west coast?

[The Mighty Peanut]

A LOT goes into getting clean. It also means that those around you are up for the punishment as well. This whole, everyone stands around Kim like teflon while she apologizes and takes her lumps is just so unrealistic to me so I get why she's always got one foot out of the door when she in her version of recovery. She can't truly recover if she's not allowed to express what sort of things cause her to want to escape from reality. At this point it's the high itself of course but let's be honest she's going to need to be able to express her resentments and anger too but that's not part of the plan for her. Anything that would imply those around her aren't suffering victims is a slap in the face for what they have done for her. Catch 22.

 

Besides the pull I can believe that she has triggers all around that are brought on by those she loves but she can't admit that because then that's her blaming someone but shit if that's what's going through her mind the moment she feels she needs a hit then that's what it is. How on earth is she ever gonna to get where she needs to be if she can't even express what her truths are regarding how her addiction takes hold of her and the reasons why?

 

I couldn't agree more. I've seen this play out the most obviously on the show Intervention, but in my own life and the lives of other friends and family as well. Addicts demonstrate behavior that is unacceptable to society in a really obvious way. It's easy to look at someone who squandered the family fortune and fucked strangers and acts a damn fool to to fund a heroin habit. It's not as easy when the addict admits that he/she started using because a well-respected family member or clergy who is married and has children had abused him/her. Or any other number of horrible things that have long term effects and could potentially destroy a family. This happened to a (non-addict) friend of mine. She finally confessed a family member raped her repeatedly as a young girl when she found out he was having his own kids. The family accused her of lying and shut her out because frankly it was easier to cut ties with her than it was with him, because he was so connected and was a huge source of financial support, and appeared more emotionally stable on the surface. He is now serving 35 years in jail for, you guessed it, child molestation. Everyone has tremendous guilt including my friend because she feels she could have prevented another child from being hurt.

 

I don't mean to be like dr drew and imply every addict was molested. I'm just saying it's a great point that families and friends often DON'T want to hear and be forced to internalize the things that helped cause the addiction in the first place. Instead they just say "Well *I* had [insert shitty childhood trauma] and *I* didn't start shooting drugs." And it's so much more complicated than that, and I think Kim's life has been a series of those complications and the way they've spiderwebbed (no LVP pun intended) throughout her entire extended family and into the community.

[Yours Truly]

Yes, the all married young.  Little Kathy was the only one who didn't have a baby well short of 9 months.  Actually, their mother was usually pregnant when she married as well, except for the marriage after menopause was looming.

 

I find that pretty odd, that all 3 of the children married wealthy men while they were still teenagers.  None went to college or found work. 

 

Yes, I do believe that Kim has deep seated issues, and those issues lead to her substance abuse, and until they are dealt with, she'll never get better.  What they are?  Most are guesses, some good ones given her upbringing, later actions, and eye witness statements about they way they were raised and what their mother was like.

I find the doubt about Kim's troubled past and whether it's really impacted her to the point of what we see now very surprising. I mean it's very well known that Kim was a child actor during a period where the needs of the child actor was almost non existent. It's an era well known to be brutal with it's young actors and also known to be a serious cause of many tragedies. There's also no doubt about the dysfunction within the family due to plenty of knowledge out there by way of many different sources including the Richards sisters themselves. The substance abuse has been tracked back to a very young age so there's decades of damage we know of and yet the minimalization of what Kim faces continues. I for one have no doubt in my mind that these numerous challenges have deeply affected Kim. Partnered with other factors within Kim's basic make up and yeah I'm pretty convinced that she's got her work cut out for her and in no way shape or form do I think it boils down to some simple equation that Kim is just refusing to solve. 

Edited March 11, 2016 by Yours Truly