S05.E08: Intimacy

[humbleopinion]

jsampson- Strong feeling Ashley will be free soon for you to impregnate and give your name if you don't mind Anthony's seconds...

[Jack Sampson]

3 minutes ago, humbleopinion said:

jsampson- Strong feeling Ashley will be free soon for you to impregnate and give your name if you don't mind Anthony's seconds...

Everybody's gonna goof on me for finally liking one of these women.  Ha! 

IRL, she's too old for me.

[humbleopinion]

Whine gets better with age...

[gonecrackers]

So Cody would’ve done Danielle but he didn’t do it for Danielle so then Cody wouldn’t do Danielle but now they might have done it..  confusing couple.

The theory is Sheila doesn’t trust enough to have an orgasm… maybe, but, never? I guess she doesn't trust herself either.

Edited June 2, 2017 by gonecrackers
clarification

[cgarcia]

Interesting article....seems like Danielle may be sending mixed messages...

 

http://people.com/tv/married-at-first-sight-cody-knapek-danielle-degroot-blow-confidence-bedroom/

[Liberty]

Anthony displays (or the editors do) some solid judgement in when and when not to address situations that may become conflicts.  Is it possible that Ashley does realize how fortunate she is?

[gonecrackers]

3 hours ago, Evil Queen said:

I actually thought he looked a little mad when Ashley was talking about what happened with rachel. Which honestly they both should be.

I definitely thought Anthony looked a bit pissed & rightfully so.

3 minutes ago, Liberty said:

Anthony displays (or the editors do) some solid judgement in when and when not to address situations that may become conflicts.

It seems like he does. He also seems a bit apprehensive in discussing 'deeper' issues with Ashley, but she seems to want to get things out. Either he's just not feeling ready, is tentative about discussing things with her, or just doesn't want to deal with conflict. Or, it's coming soon.

[okerry]

15 hours ago, Paddywagon said:

Cody had sex every day before being chosen for the show???

Yes, I am a terrible person. My first thought was, "With what?"

14 hours ago, lilsadone said:

I saw that too, where Cody said he was having sex daily before he got married. And he said that's the reason why he wants to wait so he can make sure they develop a real connection first because this is important to him. 

 

OR MAYBE he's just trying to wait a month to take another STI/STD test and get the "all clear" from the doc, since he was sluting it up all over town. 

#keepingItPetty

haha I think you win the board for today!

[okerry]

6 hours ago, Jaclyn88 said:

I just think at this point Danielle and Cody are counting down the days. I don't think either one is a bad person and I think both could find happiness with someone else,

Yup. Sometimes it just ain't there. They friendzoned each other at the altar, and that's just the way it is.

[Empress1]

1 hour ago, cgarcia said:

Interesting article....seems like Danielle may be sending mixed messages...

 

http://people.com/tv/married-at-first-sight-cody-knapek-danielle-degroot-blow-confidence-bedroom/

I was out last night so didn't see the ep yet but I read that article and I feel some type of way about Danielle's dog's being named Dude and Homie.

[Tara Ariano]

In case you missed it, here's the Previously.TV post on the episode!

 

Bride And Doom: This Is Not Going The Way That I Thought It Was Going To

The 'Intimacy' episode gives Rachel a chance to shine. Just kidding, she has no helpful advice and in at least one case is actively harmful.

[Lopethina]

I watched an hour-and-15-minute episode but didn't hear this bit about Cody having lots of sex previously.  Can someone fill me in on the exact quote and context?

It sure seems to me like their problems come from his lack of confidence and "game," most likely stemming from being overweight in the past.  He doesn't act like a hot guy, which can be good or bad depending on what his partners are looking for, but it's definitely a problem for Danielle.  There have been SO MANY CHANCES for him to initiate sex, but he seems to be waiting for a written invitation, while Danielle wants to be taken. 

Edited June 2, 2017 by Lopethina

[humbleopinion]

His confession of everyday sex came in the 15 minute Unfiltered show that precedes the new episode.

He came up with that gem while watching himself in the In Laws episode with Jamie Odious.

 On Demand may list it as S5-Unflitered:The In-Laws

Start DVRing the 15 minute Unfiltered shows before the new episodes because they are snark gold.

Edited June 2, 2017 by humbleopinion

[Trisha neel]

13 hours ago, Mindthinkr said:

I think that speaks of her insecurities. Why is she so insecure? Her sister Lauren who is always jumping into her business. This MAFS might have been the best thing that ever happened to her. It didn't leave her sister time to sow the seeds of doubt which is why I'm sure that she never made it to the alter in the first place. 

Ashley had been in a 6 year relationship. She left that relationship because he didn't want children. Nothing at all to do with the sister. The sister is all made up Drama. They all get along very well. 

[MsPH]

I don't think Rachel was intentionally trying to instill doubt in Ashley's mind, she was basically just saying Ashley should perhaps learn to manage her own emotions a bit better instead of expecting her husband to do it for her, and Ashley immediately jumped to the conclusion that Anthony must've complained about it. Rachel's concern is obviously highly ironic considering the experts keep matching people with opposite personality traits and then try to rationalize it by saying they'll balance each other out. Now that it's finally working with one couple, it's suddenly a bad thing? I do agree that it's generally wrong to expect these people to fix each others' issues, so I found it interesting that Rachel basically confirmed in that moment that they're talking crap about their reasons for matching people. It's really a crapshoot and no matter what happens they'll find a way to justify it.

Anyway, I think A&A are really cute and they'll probably just grow closer the better they get to know each other. Ashley might calm down naturally once things settle down and she feels more secure. I don't see any major issues unless they're just very good at hiding them.

I think Cody and Danielle should just have sex already, because the longer they wait, the higher that treshold becomes. I don't see what they have to lose at this point. Neither of them are virgins and both say they find each other attractive, so it can't be that disgusting a thought, even if there's no major spark. Sex releases oxytocin and stuff, so it might create that spark they're after and bond them closer together. If they're really still hoping to move the relationship forward, then it's a risk worth taking. Less talk, more action! Danielle actually looked a bit excited during the dance lesson and then they had to ruin it again with that awkward dinner conversation. Just. stop. talking. already. Or talk about something fun and totally irrelevant rather than how you feel about whatever you just did. Yawn. Could she have looked any less comfortable during that talk with Rachel when Cody had his hand on her knee?

I liked how Nate handled the situation with Sheila's dad. He's not totally hopeless. I hope she was just talking in general about the whole clubbing several times a week thing and it's not something Nate himself actually wants to do. I'm sure he does occasionally, but I doubt he's planning on living at the club now that he's married. Sheila's just looking for possible problems again in advance. I also doubt her orgasm issue is just about trust, otherwise she would've had one by herself by now. Or does she think masturbation is a sin or something?

[Guest]

Rachel (the sex expert) was worse than worthless discussing orgasms with Sheila. She thinks working on emotional closeness is going to help?  I'm a little old lady who's only had two husbands, and I could do WAY better than that!  I don't know much, but even I could have sat with her and said, "Honey, let's talk. I have some suggestions."

[biakbiak]

6 minutes ago, Swim mom said:

. She thinks working on emotional closeness is going to help

Seriously, Sheila can't even have an orgasm by herself at 30  years old, it's clearly more than emotional closeness with her partner. Hell it could even be a medical issue.

[Evil Queen]

8 hours ago, hoosiermom said:

I actually like it when the couples are getting along and are having fun together. Heck, I'm still hoping things work out for Danielle and Cody. It did seem there was a "spark" after their date so who knows?

I like it better too but for some stupid reason the producers and "experts" feel we rather see them have drama. 

7 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

I definitely thought Anthony looked a bit pissed & rightfully so.

It seems like he does. He also seems a bit apprehensive in discussing 'deeper' issues with Ashley, but she seems to want to get things out. Either he's just not feeling ready, is tentative about discussing things with her, or just doesn't want to deal with conflict. Or, it's coming soon.

I would bet he doesn't want to discuss it on camera. As well as he may be smart in making sure to discuss certain topics at certain times rather than just in the moment. Especially after rachel was there with her bs. 

4 hours ago, Lopethina said:

I watched an hour-and-15-minute episode but didn't hear this bit about Cody having lots of sex previously.  Can someone fill me in on the exact quote and context?

It sure seems to me like their problems come from his lack of confidence and "game," most likely stemming from being overweight in the past.  He doesn't act like a hot guy, which can be good or bad depending on what his partners are looking for, but it's definitely a problem for Danielle.  There have been SO MANY CHANCES for him to initiate sex, but he seems to be waiting for a written invitation, while Danielle wants to be taken. 

Danielle doesn't want to be taken by him as far as I can see. She has stated more than a few times how she wasn't feeling it and wasn't from the get go. Of course we then have her THs telling us otherwise but never once has she acted like she did with him. She doesn't give off hints of it at all that we have seen. 

2 hours ago, Trisha neel said:

Ashley had been in a 6 year relationship. She left that relationship because he didn't want children. Nothing at all to do with the sister. The sister is all made up Drama. They all get along very well. 

I think part of it could be made up drama but there is another part that is not. Either way it doesn't mean people aren't getting along just that sometimes family needs to learn to step back some at times. 

41 minutes ago, MsPH said:

 

I don't think Rachel was intentionally trying to instill doubt in Ashley's mind,

 

She totally was. She did it right after Ashley said how well things were going. It isn't the first time they have done this crap either. This time its just a big smack in the face what she was doing. She should have told said she was happy things were working out so well and how she was there if needed for anything. Yet that isn't what happened at all. 

2 minutes ago, Swim mom said:

Rachel (the sex expert) was worse than worthless discussing orgasms with Sheila. She thinks working on emotional closeness is going to help?  I'm a little old lady who's only had two husbands, and I could do WAY better than that!  I don't know much, but even I could have sat with her and said, "Honey, let's talk. I have some suggestions."

Could have been way worse with that one though considering how she was last season. 

[Guest]

4 hours ago, Lopethina said:

I watched an hour-and-15-minute episode but didn't hear this bit about Cody having lots of sex previously.  Can someone fill me in on the exact quote and context?

I apologize if I broke a forum rule. On an "unfiltered" Cody stated that he had sex EVERY DAY until they told him that they had a match for him a month before the wedding.

[Snarklepuss]

30 minutes ago, Swim mom said:

I apologize if I broke a forum rule. On an "unfiltered" Cody stated that he had sex EVERY DAY until they told him that they had a match for him a month before the wedding.

Yes, and he said he stopped just at the moment he learned he had a match!  You can't make this stuff up!  First of all, there is something way off about that revelation, as if he's lying so as to make himself look like some kind of sexually mature stud when he's really not.  And secondly,  how creepy is THAT, for him to say he stopped "just for the show" and that he makes a distinction between "sex for recreation" and "sex in a relationship"?  VOMIT.  I think Danielle was right to keep her distance from him.  This is just major red flags all over the place.  Does he expect to bring those values into this marriage and still have someone on the side for a little "recreation"?  Didn't Danielle deserve to know about this?  When asked he admitted he never told her about it.  The look on Jamie's face was priceless.

7 hours ago, okerry said:

Yes, I am a terrible person. My first thought was, "With what?"

Well, we know he had access to farm animals.......  !!!!!

OK, major "ewww", but the way he talks it's like he's referring to a doll he takes out of the closet every day just for his pleasure.  A thing purely for objectification.  It brings up lewd images of glory holes at rest stops.  Again, major vomit!  But to be honest, I'm not buying it AT ALL.  The dude acts like a major immature puss on this show and now all of a sudden he claims to be a porn star or something.  What doesn't belong in this picture??? 

[LennieBriscoe]

Cody. Two words: "Madonna. Whore." Freud, not Ciccone.

Sheila. OMG, I really do not like this story-line. Will we next see her knees-up in the gyno's office?! And "chocolate"? At least "Brown Sugar" was a great song.

Ashley. Don't let ANY other woman--Rachel; your sister---mess up what you have with your Anthony!

Edited June 3, 2017 by LennieBriscoe

[Snarklepuss]

30 minutes ago, LennieBriscoe said:

Cody. Two words: "Madonna. Whore." Freud, not Ciccone.

Nailed it - That's why it's so hard for him to have sex with his Madonna/wife.  Never the twain shall meet.

[BillB007]

Now picture this, I think Cody was saying he had sex all the time before the marriage to Danielle to hid the truth.  I think he's gay and hasn't come out of the closet yet.  Come on!!! Married all this time and not even an attempt of having sex with her??!!!

[Snarklepuss]

33 minutes ago, LennieBriscoe said:

Sheila. OMG, I really do not like this story-line. Will we next see her knees-up in the gyno's office?! And "chocolate"? At least "Brown Sugar" was a great song.

She really needs to have a solo orgasm first.  Forget Nate being the one to "give it to her" - she needs to be introduced to a vibrator!

[humbleopinion]

Sheila has a mindset that there is only one road to orgasm.

That road is through her husband.

Perhaps that is why the experts matched her up with with a twenty something...

What he lacks in finesse he makes up in stamina.

No mind how Rico Suave N8 portrays himself..he has a insurmountable challenge in getting..his wife, " I Have Fortress Walls, Moat Dug and filled with water and alligators, Drawbridge Up" Sheila to her elusive Big O.

N8 has a lot of her emotional baggage jam packed with guilt, shame, insecurity to sort through and deal with...unfortunately for him.

Even if Sheila had a drawer full of pocket rockets with batteries fully charged, don't think she could solo to Mount Everest... if you get my drift....

Edited June 3, 2017 by humbleopinion

[Evil Queen]

11 hours ago, BillB007 said:

Now picture this, I think Cody was saying he had sex all the time before the marriage to Danielle to hid the truth.  I think he's gay and hasn't come out of the closet yet.  Come on!!! Married all this time and not even an attempt of having sex with her??!!!

I don't think he is. I think these 2 are just not into each other. Yet if he had sex with her by now and then was saying he wasn't into her really he would be given all kinds of crap. Yet its all they need to have sex when she is saying another thing outside her THs about how she feels. I think no matter what they shouldn't have been matched to begin with and were doomed from the beginning. 

[okerry]

14 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:

And secondly,  how creepy is THAT, for him to say he stopped "just for the show" and that he makes a distinction between "sex for recreation" and "sex in a relationship"? 

Well, to be fair, there are a whole, whole lot of people who handle their sex lives exactly this way, both male and female. They have sex with their friends and even with strangers and are perfectly happy with this arrangement. If you can ever get a few people to talk honestly with you for a minute, and tell you the truth instead of what they think the "right answer" is, then yes, they'll own up to doing this.

It has the added benefit of keeping most of the emotions out of any relationship, though that does occasionally backfire, and it could be that a guy who's used to casual sex that he can easily walk away from might have a very hard time making the switch to sex that does have an emotional connection as part of it - and sleeping with someone who's still going to be around the next day and even longer.

I had zero interest in casual sex and was always looking for a relationship, and it can be kind of horrifying at how cold some of the guys can be - and how disparaging they can be towards a female who doesn't like casual sex. They think banging friends and strangers is perfectly normal and even healthy. It wasn't for me, but I digress.

[okerry]

20 hours ago, Lopethina said:

There have been SO MANY CHANCES for him to initiate sex, but he seems to be waiting for a written invitation, while Danielle wants to be taken. 

I can give you a different take on this: Guys who like casual sex with little to no emotional involvement will avoid sex with women who have a good chance of getting attached to them. So, yeah, why go on this show? HellifIino. Maybe he thought the Show would find him someone he'd like well enough to stay with permanently and he wouldn't have to go through the trouble of finding one himself. But it didn't work. 

16 hours ago, Swim mom said:

Rachel (the sex expert) was worse than worthless discussing orgasms with Sheila. She thinks working on emotional closeness is going to help?

Believe it or not, for some of us, yes, emotional closeness is vital to being able to open up physically. Absolutely nothing happens without it except maybe going through the motions, and not much point in that. At least, not for me.

[okerry]

16 hours ago, biakbiak said:

Seriously, Sheila can't even have an orgasm by herself at 30  years old, it's clearly more than emotional closeness with her partner. Hell it could even be a medical issue.

Nope. I will completely disagree with you. For some of us, sex is very closely tied to an emotional bond with just one partner. I realize that doesn't happen often, but some of us are just wired that way. I've been called all kinds of disparaging names because of it, even told there must be a "medical issue." There isn't.

I'll just say that I do perfectly fine inside of a relationship with a trusted partner, and that the few attempts I ever made at casual sex were worse than useless. And no, nothing bad ever happened to me earlier in life. Some of us just don't like opening up to strangers or casual pals and want sex to be with someone who cares, not someone who's using us to get off - and who we're using in the same way. No, thanks.

Sheila, girl, call me. I know exactly how you feel and there is NOTHING wrong with you.

[KateHearts]

This episode's takeaways:

1. Cody reads a book called How to Talk to a Wife.  "I have a beautiful wife. I'm looking forward to going out on the town and having a date night. Let's do something fun together so that maybe we'll get that 'spark.'" (all spoken in a crackly, little-boy voice).

2. Danielle gives up.  ("I'm gonna just grin and bear it till this 'experiment' is finally over.") And realizes that talking about manly men who take charge is the most surefire way to emasculate them and make them never want to have sex with you.

3. Nate acts like a grownup.  Even though he still calls Sheila his "queen", he now is launched on the Ultimate Mission: Give Your Wife the Big O and prove your manhood. To his credit, he didn't act like he was in the Olympics while at the driving range, and told his mouthy father in law to shut it and respect his home (respectfully, of course).  (Side note- how did Nate and Sheila jump from her meltdowns and the total disconnect on the honeymoon to "we're deliriously in love and so connected" in just three weeks?)

4. Sheila hasn't watched herself on camera yet to realize that screwing your mouth around into weird configurations is not attractive. But styling your hair with a blowdryer does help your overall look. She's also not sure what climaxing has to do with chocolate, and the therapist hasn't made that any clearer. At all.

5. Ashley realizes that she isn't absolutely, perfectly desirable just as she is, and that marriage isn't just going to be giggles and HomeGoods wall art for the rest of her days. Hence, she turns on the tears ("look at me! I'm sad!")

6. Anthony feels like he has allowed Ashley to be in control for now, since he gave in to her suggestion of getting a pedicure and making his gnarly feet look a little bit more acceptable. But he's getting noticeably a little more leery of what might happen at any moment necessitating lots of careful avoidance of certain topics and soothing of feelings.

[zxy556575]

Ashley needs to stop saying she's so independent and in control. She relies on her family for a job, lets her sister run roughshod over her and can't even cool herself off when the A/C goes out. That's some seriously jacked self awareness.

[humbleopinion]

Notice how many times Anthony is looking to the side during his on camera time...and that nervous little laugh he does... heh... a single heh.

He is already subconsciously looking for the exit...

Anthony is a gentleman and go through the rest of the experiment and not make Ashley look bad.

He may even agree to continue the marriage in the Decision show but she's not the girl for him in the long haul....

[Madding crowd]

I really like Nate and thought he did a great job of sticking up for his wife and yet not being disrespectful to his father-in-law. At 26, that is pretty mature. My husband of 22 years still has trouble sticking up for me (although that is with his family not mine). I know Sheila and Nate are having lots of sex but I still don't know if they are really attracted to each other. I just dont see loving glances or the kind of feeling like I see with Ashley and Anthony. A&A are cute together and I like both of them. Ashely seems prettty high maintenance though and I wonder if Anthony wants that long term.  I really cant stand the 'expert' Rachel and her junior high clothes and makeup.

I might be the only one but I dont like Danielle. She seems frumpy and entitled to me. Cody is cute but very low key and wouldn't be my type at all. But I hate Danielle's constant comments on him not doing or being manly in some way. All men are not the same and not interchangeable. On top of that, if Cody does make a move I'm quite sure she will shoot it down. I dont think he is really attracted to her either. I have no idea why he is even on the show since he doesn't seem like he is ready for marriage. And, jumping back to Nate and Sheila-I would have to know more about the clubbing thing. My husband still likes to go to sports bars occasionally with friends to talk and have some drinks, I know that is not exactly like clubbing, but it might just be a social outlet. Asking Sheila if she trusts him with a group of women is a bit puzzling though-if you are going out with men friends you should be ignoring groups of women. 

[nutella fitzgerald]

Cody in his leather jacket on the bed reminded me of George Michael Bluth wanting to prove he was macho, except George Michael and Maeby had more chemistry than Cody and Danielle.

ETA: Also, could someone arrange for Rachel DeAlto to NEVER AGAIN refer to orgasms as "chocolate"? I agree with everyone who said she was spectacularly unhelpful to Anthony and Ashley, but at least I wasn't dry heaving during her visit with them.

Edited June 4, 2017 by nutella fitzgerald

[Empress1]

6 hours ago, okerry said:

Believe it or not, for some of us, yes, emotional closeness is vital to being able to open up physically. Absolutely nothing happens without it except maybe going through the motions, and not much point in that. At least, not for me.

And not just women - men too. My ex is someone who could go through the motions and "finish" with a woman he didn't care about (friction is friction, after all) , but it wouldn't be satisfying to him. He just didn't like sleeping around, so he didn't. 

My guess re: Sheila's lack of orgasms (OMG Rachel, your metaphor is trash) is that for her, she does need to be emotionally connected to someone in order to let go, and for whatever reason she hasn't been able to do that with the men in her past. If she's never masturbated (I had a friend in college who never had, which shocked me), she may not know how to please herself so she can't tell/show her partners what she likes. If she has tried to masturbate but can't climax that way, then I might think there's a medical issue but if she just doesn't like having sex with men she's not at least in like with, there's nothing wrong with that. But IMO she needs to give herself a hand or toy.

[Gem 10]

2 hours ago, nutella fitzgerald said:

Cody in his leather jacket on the bed reminded me of George Michael Bluth wanting to prove he was macho, except George Michael and Maeby had more chemistry than Cody and Danielle.

ETA: Also, could someone arrange for Rachel DeAlto to NEVER AGAIN refer to orgasms as "chocolate"? I agree with everyone who said she was spectacularly unhelpful to Anthony and Ashley, but at least I wasn't dry heaving during her visit with them.

 I don't understand why they all have to have ANY EXPERTS at all.  First of all, they just met, and second of all, they need time to adjust to talking, sleeping together, having sex (maybe) and everything else.  Throw in some in-laws and you have stress beyond words.  Then you have these three schlubs coming into their home, asking questions,  and starting trouble.  I wouldn't tell them didly squat .. Especially that salivating Rachel.  They only know each other 2 or 3 weeks for goodness sake.   And Rachel, some people hate chocolate, but LOVE sex.

[discoprincess]

All I could think of with Ashley and Anthony was it was a good thing Rachel didn't reveal what Anthony had  stated were his concerns. Imagine the meltdown Ashley would have had then!

[Snarklepuss]

11 hours ago, okerry said:

Well, to be fair, there are a whole, whole lot of people who handle their sex lives exactly this way, both male and female. They have sex with their friends and even with strangers and are perfectly happy with this arrangement. If you can ever get a few people to talk honestly with you for a minute, and tell you the truth instead of what they think the "right answer" is, then yes, they'll own up to doing this.

If Nate were to sit on the couch and say that there would be a riot on the board with people coming out of the woodwork to stone him and call him a "player" that's not ready for marriage and that Sheila should run, run run as fast as she can.  But because seemingly choirboy Cody says it it's somehow OK to wax apologetic for him and claim that Danielle is at fault because she's just not into him?  I think the guy is a creepster, pure and simple.  His little boy innocent persona doesn't change anything for me.  There is something very off about what he said.  I personally think it's a lie, and he's so clueless he doesn't realize how ridiculous it sounded.  Plus, Danielle likely didn't sign on for someone who would claim such a thing and the fact that he hasn't been open with her about it is suspicious too.

Edited June 4, 2017 by Snarklepuss

[Snarklepuss]

8 hours ago, Madding crowd said:

I might be the only one but I dont like Danielle. She seems frumpy and entitled to me. Cody is cute but very low key and wouldn't be my type at all. But I hate Danielle's constant comments on him not doing or being manly in some way. All men are not the same and not interchangeable. On top of that, if Cody does make a move I'm quite sure she will shoot it down. I dont think he is really attracted to her either. I have no idea why he is even on the show since he doesn't seem like he is ready for marriage.

I think Danielle is coming off irked at the situation and I don't blame her.  I think she senses something is off with Cody, and not knowing exactly what it is it's putting her off.  She is like "whatever" about it, so it comes off as entitlement when really it's her disappointment in not getting matched with someone more mature and on her level, which I certainly think she had a right to expect from this show.  I see Cody only well matched with a college student.  That's more on his level.  He is definitely not ready for marriage and he should be if he's going to be on this show.

I also hate how the show makes them do these stupid talking heads where they repeat the same thing over and over again making them look like they're harping on one little aspect of everything to death.  I am sure that's way out of context to the reality where Danielle is concerned and mostly a factor of the show editing or the producer's prodding.  She also may not be able to put into words what it is about him she finds lacking well enough to avoid using terminology that can be misconstrued.  Plus I still think she doesn't want to sound mean and the truth is she could exchange the word "manly" for "mature" but thinks it would be too harsh or critical to do so.  I think she's actually trying to be kind!  In addition, Cody himself has owned up to not coming off the way he seems to think he should be for a guy that owns his own business and is supposedly comfortable with leadership roles with Danielle, so it's not like he's even disagreeing with her!  So far he's been like "I know I've been a wussie with Danielle but I can be a man, I'll prove it!"

Edited June 4, 2017 by Snarklepuss

[Snarklepuss]

On 6/2/2017 at 3:26 PM, gonecrackers said:

I definitely thought Anthony looked a bit pissed & rightfully so.

It seems like he does. He also seems a bit apprehensive in discussing 'deeper' issues with Ashley, but she seems to want to get things out. Either he's just not feeling ready, is tentative about discussing things with her, or just doesn't want to deal with conflict. Or, it's coming soon.

Regarding Rachel's "shit stirring" that got Ashley upset - Timing is everything, IMO and it's really early in these relationships to expect the deeper level of communication that she was pushing for with them.  Every couple has their own timetable for that IMO and it's destructive to try to push them into it which I think Rachel was doing.  I know that they spend a lot of time together but I don't think the relationships are any further along as a result.  A couple's emotions have to catch up to their experiences and that can take time no matter how much time they spend together in a short period.  Ashley and Anthony's emotional readiness to broach such things will probably come in time, but now is just not the time.  No judgment there, I think they're well within the boundaries of normal for only having known each other a few weeks!  That said, Anthony is wise not to push too soon with issues like that because he knows how Ashley can be.  Once trust builds a little more she may not jump to the worst case scenario upon hearing that stuff.   I think it shows wisdom on his part to hold back a little for now until he senses that she can handle it, and yes, I agree that he looked pissed and rightly so!

[Snarklepuss]

5 hours ago, Empress1 said:

My guess re: Sheila's lack of orgasms (OMG Rachel, your metaphor is trash) is that for her, she does need to be emotionally connected to someone in order to let go, and for whatever reason she hasn't been able to do that with the men in her past. If she's never masturbated (I had a friend in college who never had, which shocked me), she may not know how to please herself so she can't tell/show her partners what she likes. If she has tried to masturbate but can't climax that way, then I might think there's a medical issue but if she just doesn't like having sex with men she's not at least in like with, there's nothing wrong with that. But IMO she needs to give herself a hand or toy.

I think the best-guess statistics on how many adult women have never achieved orgasm in any way are anything from 5-15%, so I'm willing to go with 10% on that, which is rather low, and IMO usually means something else is going on either physically, emotionally, or mentally.  Let's face it, it is harder for women to achieve orgasm in general, and even among those that can, something like 20-30% can have difficulty getting there, either because they can't relax or whatever.  It is true that a lot of women have to be emotionally in a zen place to "allow" themselves to achieve orgasm.  It's normally not purely a physiological response (although it can be under certain circumstances) for women.  If we are mad, unhappy or just not feeling "safe" it can make getting there impossible.  I have been there and done that!   I think we can only conjecture on the reasons Sheila hasn't been able to achieve one but seeing her judgmental father in action plus knowing she comes from a certain, perhaps sexually restrictive religious background maybe means she has some difficulty giving herself "permission" to have one and yes, may need to feel that she is within the context of a relationship to feel "right" about having one, and even then it might have to be a certain kind of relationship. 

Speaking of knowing people from sexually restrictive religious backgrounds, my best friend, who I've known for over 40 years, converted to a "born again" Christian church 25 years ago and ever since then has not had sexual relations of any kind whatsoever - A backlash to what she thought were her "wild" 20s (which I thought were rather tame but this was her perception).  It's dysfunctional and based on feeling "wrong" about herself but it is what it is.  She has probably sabotaged and avoided relationships with men so as to end up single at almost 60.  It's sad!  I don't ask her about whether she masturbates, that's TMI even for us, but I wouldn't be surprised if she never does that either. 

[Blissfool]

On 6/1/2017 at 9:10 PM, Gem 10 said:

What could Ashley be referring to that makes her want to cry?  Does she want a baby pronto, or is it about the last name change.  And why the big secret about it?  I don't get it.

No secret. It's just that she's needy, high-maintenance, and whiney. She couldn't bear the thought that Anthony might have talked negatively about her to the therapist. 

 

On 6/2/2017 at 1:11 PM, Jack Sampson said:

When Ashley grunted and said that the Rachel meeting wasn't going the way she expected - She's officially the cutest girl I've ever seen.  

I agree. And I'm a heterosexual female!

On 6/2/2017 at 1:28 PM, cardigirl said:

That's what gets you going?  SMH...I'll never understand that.  

I've been known to get into a relationship or two because I think I can "fix" people. Yes, i know that's bad.

On another note, I wonder what was the blurred-out part of Ashley's wall art.

[humbleopinion]

Adorable that Anthony got misty and verklempt about his giftee from Ash.

Ant is gonna make someone a good husband someday.

Whether he is Ash's forever hubby...we will see.

Blurred out?...the name/address of the building of their M@FS love nest...

[Wings]

Again, I agree with everything @Snarklepuss has said. 

Rachael made a huge mistake with Ashley and she realized it immediately.  She created a problem in Ashley's mind that wasn't there.  

It would be like asking Anthony if he thought Ashley might like him to get more sun because he is so pale.  LOL! 

Danielle and Cody are just going through the motions to finish the taping and get a divorce.  I don't even see much of a friendship here.  

Edited June 4, 2017 by wings707

[gonecrackers]

10 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:

Regarding Rachel's "shit stirring" that got Ashley upset - Timing is everything, IMO and it's really early in these relationships to expect the deeper level of communication that she was pushing for with them.  Every couple has their own timetable for that IMO and it's destructive to try to push them into it which I think Rachel was doing.  I know that they spend a lot of time together but I don't think the relationships are any further along as a result.  A couple's emotions have to catch up to their experiences and that can take time no matter how much time they spend together in a short period.  Ashley and Anthony's emotional readiness to broach such things will probably come in time, but now is just not the time.  No judgment there, I think they're well within the boundaries of normal for only having known each other a few weeks!  That said, Anthony is wise not to push too soon with issues like that because he knows how Ashley can be.  Once trust builds a little more she may not jump to the worst case scenario upon hearing that stuff.   I think it shows wisdom on his part to hold back a little for now until he senses that she can handle it, and yes, I agree that he looked pissed and rightly so!

Yeeeaaah I get what you're saying & normally in budding relationships it does take time to get comfortable with certain conversations & topics. Ashley, though, has challenged him a little here & there, which is probably a good thing - maybe she's trying to figure him out; not just his opinions but his reactions.

Anthony, however, seems somewhat intimidated when she does that. He diverts her with humor to get off the topic. If he feels it's 'too soon' well okay I get that, but, they are married & if she's willing to take on the topic I wonder what his problem is about it. He's firmer in his TH's & interviews than he is with Ashley so that irks me a bit I guess.

And for someone who is so afraid of family interference his sit down with Ashley's dad seemed to contradict himself - (but production wanted it done, so there's that most likely).

[discoprincess]

4 hours ago, wings707 said:

Again, I agree with everything @Snarklepuss has said. 

Rachael made a huge mistake with Ashley and she realized it immediately.  She created a problem in Ashley's mind that wasn't there.  

It would be like asking Anthony if he thought Ashley might like him to get more sun because he is so pale.  LOL! 

Danielle and Cody are just going through the motions to finish the taping and get a divorce.  I don't even see much of a friendship here.  

I can see Ashley dragging Anthony to get a spray tan! (Hopefully it'll be for a spray tan and not to a tanning salon.)

The only good Rachel could have done was to act as a mediator if it were to come out that Anthony felt was if Ashley's sister was potentially going to interfere in the marriage too much. 

Who thinks that Danielle and Cody secretly sleep in separate quarters once the cameras are off?  I really wish Danielle would do what Heather did last season-pull the plug all together-or something like what Sonia did-send Cody home to mama, and go through the motions of "dating" and "rebuilding their marriage" until the 8 weeks are up. After all, it was Cody's idea to "take a step back".

Edited June 4, 2017 by discoprincess

[humbleopinion]

Surprised the cameras haven't followed Cody to his gym showing him doing "manly man" things like lifting heavy weights, flexing his bulging muscles, suicide burpees, American Ninja style parkour leaping about...maybe he owns a Curves style ladies gym....

[Wings]

8 minutes ago, humbleopinion said:

Surprised the cameras haven't followed Cody to his gym showing him doing "manly man" things like lifting heavy weights, flexing his bulging muscles, suicide burpees, American Ninja style parkour leaping about...maybe he owns a Curves style ladies gym....

The gym probably won't allow cameras or they would!  They would love to catch him doing the treadmill for 40 mins and then having a smoothie at their snack bar.  

[humbleopinion]

Thought Cody was the owner of his gym.

Remember he had to move back home to mommy because he spent all his money on opening the gym?

[Wings]

36 minutes ago, humbleopinion said:

Thought Cody was the owner of his gym.

Remember he had to move back home to mommy because he spent all his money on opening the gym?

I don't retain details on this show, or life in general.  ;^)