S03.E08: Proposal in the City

[cereality]

Jer came off a lot less weird to me in this episode -- probably bc he was on his home turf and didn't have to worry about impressing anyone. It's pretty clear though that he has lived on his own for a while - not in mommy's house or a dorm but in his own apartments - and thus does things a certain way. Nothing wrong with that - we all do. But given how much he wants a traditional marriage where he's the headship for a meek wife with the maturity of a 12 yr old -- I have a feeling Jinger is about to get a LOT of "training" from Jer about how to make the perfect coffee; sandwich; lasagna; how he likes his laundry; how he likes his trash taken out or his grocery shopping done. After all even though he's doing these things for himself now, I'm fairly sure he'll want his meek wife to take over such wifely duties after the wedding night.

Nice to see Jer with real friends, not made for TV ones like the Duggars. You can tell him and Luis have some real friendship - even if they don't see each other daily anymore. Just by their interactions - Luis on bended knee when Jer opens the door; Luis saying - we're still going for Korean BBQ after the engagement right, that's really the only reason I came; and after Luis grilled at his house, Jer saying -- can I say I made some of this stuff?? You can tell they joke around like regular guys.

Not that'll it'll EVER happen but how nice would it be if the Lord put it in the headship's heart that after getting 1-2 yrs of experience in Laredo, he should work in the NY-NJ-PA area. Though reality is he actually will have to WORK if he wants to be in NY-NJ-PA -- whether it's for a real church or another real job with a paycheck; those areas aren't cheap -- there aren't $400/month apartments like in Laredo; so in order to make at least $1000-1500 rent for a VERY modest, old apartment, you have to pull in some income. While the NJ/NY suburbs aren't the city, it's the closest Jinger could get to her fantasy of life in the city. They are densely populated suburbs with hustle and bustle, amenities galore and more coffee shops than anyone could want; plus she and Jer could take NJ Transit into Manhattan like every weekend to go explore and Jinger would actually feel like she knows city life beyond the 2 days here and there than she gets treated to be TLC and/or NBC/People. Though I feel like if Jinger is as shrewd as Jessa, she COULD convince Jer in a few yrs that the Lord is putting it in her heart that they should return to the NY/NJ area to be near HIS family etc and unless Jer is REALLY averse to working (he could be, he is wanting to be a Duggar after all), he could want to go back and buy into it.

[BunnyBlueBrown]

5 hours ago, cereality said:

Jer came off a lot less weird to me in this episode -- probably bc he was on his home turf and didn't have to worry about impressing anyone. It's pretty clear though that he has lived on his own for a while - not in mommy's house or a dorm but in his own apartments - and thus does things a certain way. Nothing wrong with that - we all do. But given how much he wants a traditional marriage where he's the headship for a meek wife with the maturity of a 12 yr old -- I have a feeling Jinger is about to get a LOT of "training" from Jer about how to make the perfect coffee; sandwich; lasagna; how he likes his laundry; how he likes his trash taken out or his grocery shopping done. After all even though he's doing these things for himself now, I'm fairly sure he'll want his meek wife to take over such wifely duties after the wedding night.

Nice to see Jer with real friends, not made for TV ones like the Duggars. You can tell him and Luis have some real friendship - even if they don't see each other daily anymore. Just by their interactions - Luis on bended knee when Jer opens the door; Luis saying - we're still going for Korean BBQ after the engagement right, that's really the only reason I came; and after Luis grilled at his house, Jer saying -- can I say I made some of this stuff?? You can tell they joke around like regular guys.

Not that'll it'll EVER happen but how nice would it be if the Lord put it in the headship's heart that after getting 1-2 yrs of experience in Laredo, he should work in the NY-NJ-PA area. Though reality is he actually will have to WORK if he wants to be in NY-NJ-PA -- whether it's for a real church or another real job with a paycheck; those areas aren't cheap -- there aren't $400/month apartments like in Laredo; so in order to make at least $1000-1500 rent for a VERY modest, old apartment, you have to pull in some income. While the NJ/NY suburbs aren't the city, it's the closest Jinger could get to her fantasy of life in the city. They are densely populated suburbs with hustle and bustle, amenities galore and more coffee shops than anyone could want; plus she and Jer could take NJ Transit into Manhattan like every weekend to go explore and Jinger would actually feel like she knows city life beyond the 2 days here and there than she gets treated to be TLC and/or NBC/People. Though I feel like if Jinger is as shrewd as Jessa, she COULD convince Jer in a few yrs that the Lord is putting it in her heart that they should return to the NY/NJ area to be near HIS family etc and unless Jer is REALLY averse to working (he could be, he is wanting to be a Duggar after all), he could want to go back and buy into it.

Since Josh was the first to move away and live the city life, the others may be more turned off to try it. I think her living in Texas is a big step. It is actually a brave step for her, since Jill, Jessa, and Josh stuck around the compound after marriage. 

[Churchhoney]

7 hours ago, cereality said:

Jer came off a lot less weird to me in this episode -- probably bc he was on his home turf and didn't have to worry about impressing anyone. It's pretty clear though that he has lived on his own for a while - not in mommy's house or a dorm but in his own apartments - and thus does things a certain way. Nothing wrong with that - we all do. But given how much he wants a traditional marriage where he's the headship for a meek wife with the maturity of a 12 yr old -- I have a feeling Jinger is about to get a LOT of "training" from Jer about how to make the perfect coffee; sandwich; lasagna; how he likes his laundry; how he likes his trash taken out or his grocery shopping done. After all even though he's doing these things for himself now, I'm fairly sure he'll want his meek wife to take over such wifely duties after the wedding night.

Nice to see Jer with real friends, not made for TV ones like the Duggars. You can tell him and Luis have some real friendship - even if they don't see each other daily anymore. Just by their interactions - Luis on bended knee when Jer opens the door; Luis saying - we're still going for Korean BBQ after the engagement right, that's really the only reason I came; and after Luis grilled at his house, Jer saying -- can I say I made some of this stuff?? You can tell they joke around like regular guys.

Not that'll it'll EVER happen but how nice would it be if the Lord put it in the headship's heart that after getting 1-2 yrs of experience in Laredo, he should work in the NY-NJ-PA area. Though reality is he actually will have to WORK if he wants to be in NY-NJ-PA -- whether it's for a real church or another real job with a paycheck; those areas aren't cheap -- there aren't $400/month apartments like in Laredo; so in order to make at least $1000-1500 rent for a VERY modest, old apartment, you have to pull in some income. While the NJ/NY suburbs aren't the city, it's the closest Jinger could get to her fantasy of life in the city. They are densely populated suburbs with hustle and bustle, amenities galore and more coffee shops than anyone could want; plus she and Jer could take NJ Transit into Manhattan like every weekend to go explore and Jinger would actually feel like she knows city life beyond the 2 days here and there than she gets treated to be TLC and/or NBC/People. Though I feel like if Jinger is as shrewd as Jessa, she COULD convince Jer in a few yrs that the Lord is putting it in her heart that they should return to the NY/NJ area to be near HIS family etc and unless Jer is REALLY averse to working (he could be, he is wanting to be a Duggar after all), he could want to go back and buy into it.

This would sure be the best case scenario. And I think it is true that, to whatever small extent Derick and Bin are still being themselves rather than playing the full Duggar game, they've pushed Jill and Jessa to change and move out of the Duggar trance at least a bit. (a very tiny bit)

All this hinges on why Jeremy wants to be a Duggar in the first place, though. And who the heck knows why that is. Since he seemed to go so far out of his way to dig up a 12-year-old he didn't know to marry, it's hard to believe that he doesn't have some powerful and unfortunate motivation for wanting to be a member of the Duggars, rather than just Jinger's husband. And I don't see what that could be other than TeeVee fame to build his "ministry" or something.

As you say, that's going to be a barrier to moving to a city or even to the east coast generally, moneywise -- and also availability of fundie-pulpits-wise, I expect. Since no matter what he wants, I don't see Duggar fame getting him a megachurch any time soon. And I wonder whether he'd fear that a move to someplace so Duggar-alien would mean that the TeeVee cameras would stop following him. I expect he needs those cameras for his plan, whatever it is. Because otherwise, with all the fundie women in the world, why would anybody make a special effort to get JIm Bob and Michelle as their in-laws?

Edited October 16, 2016 by Churchhoney

[LittlePeas3]

While I found watching this episode far more entertaining than all the flashbacks, the highlight of watching it on Youtube was seeing the Jennifer Aniston Emirates ad.  

I swear, if we didn't have to have commentary, and they just showed what happened, things would feel less "pieced" together and so staged!  

Michelle was there solely for her $ take, as was Anna, but I read someone's comment earlier stating that she deserves her $ because they wouldn't be there without here! 

Miracle #1 for Jeremy for saint hood, he prayed the rain away! (I know, they are not Catholics :p )  

Those white shoes, omg they looked STUPID!  

Oh they kissed, after that proposal, I am sure they kissed!  

[YupItsMe]

16 hours ago, Churchhoney said:

<snip>

As you say, that's going to be a barrier to moving to a city or even to the east coast generally, moneywise -- and also availability of fundie-pulpits-wise, I expect. 

<snip>

I don't know... a few people might watch "JinJer does New York". I'd love to see them at Broadway shows and "ethnic" restaurants and in the naughty areas handing out tracts. 

Edited October 17, 2016 by YupItsMe
Tried to move my response from the quote box. Still getting the hang of things.

[louannems]

I also thought JinJer kissed after the proposal.  I think TLC had to edit it out to protect the Duggar brand of chastity.

[GeeGolly]

4 hours ago, louannems said:

I also thought JinJer kissed after the proposal.  I think TLC had to edit it out to protect the Duggar brand of chastity.

So sad that such a natural thing as kissing you fiance's forehead is a big deal.

[Christina87]

Did anyone catch (and I'm not positive it was in this episode) when Jinger said something like, "I don't THINK we're kissing before marriage?" Boy, would I have loved to hear her elaborate on that!

[Sew Sumi]

I think that might have been the in the preview for tomorrow's episode.

Edited October 17, 2016 by Sew Sumi

[yogi2014L]

I watched last week and legit cannot remember any previews lol must have been boring!!

Well I think  the wedding hasn't happened yet- what on earth are they going to show this week that won't be a pile of snores?

I hope they did kiss. Its so normal!

[Westiepeach]

44 minutes ago, yogi2014L said:

I hope they did kiss. Its so normal!

Normal? Duggars? Um, no.

[BunnyBlueBrown]

5 hours ago, Christina87 said:

Did anyone catch (and I'm not positive it was in this episode) when Jinger said something like, "I don't THINK we're kissing before marriage?" Boy, would I have loved to hear her elaborate on that!

She immediately corrected herself and said they were definitely not to <insert typical Duggar talk about saving first kiss for marriage>

[Sew Sumi]

1 hour ago, yogi2014L said:

I watched last week and legit cannot remember any previews lol must have been boring!!

Well I think  the wedding hasn't happened yet- what on earth are they going to show this week that won't be a pile of snores?

I hope they did kiss. Its so normal!

It was in an extended preview that they showed maybe Thursday night around 10:30. Thursdays are a busy TV night (Drag Race and Project Runway), but my DVR picked it up in the last minute or so of PR. They showed maybe the first five minutes of the actual show (the Korean BBQ) then a couple of teasers for the rest of the episode. 

[Churchhoney]

14 hours ago, DOBABYR said:

She immediately corrected herself and said they were definitely not to <insert typical Duggar talk about saving first kiss for marriage>

In other words, any and all authentic responses from a Duggarling adult must be instantly squashed, repudiated, lied about, denied.

We are Jizm Bob and MEEchelle Duggar. We must destroy whatever we cannot control.

We had a heart for having 19 children. And then -- when it became clear that each had the potential to develop into an independent being --  squashing them like bugs.

Lovely.

[Zahdii]

2 hours ago, Churchhoney said:

In other words, any and all authentic responses from a Duggarling adult must be instantly squashed, repudiated, lied about, denied.

We are Jizm Bob and MEEchelle Duggar. We must destroy whatever we cannot control.

We had a heart for having 19 children. And then -- when it became clear that each had the potential to develop into an independent being --  squashing them like bugs.

Lovely.

And the kids, at least some of them, do it too.  Remember when Jinger said she'd like to live in a city when she married?  Poor girl apparently never even considered going to the big city on her own, and thanks to her upbringing she'd have no idea how to go about it anyway.  She had no one she knew that she could stay with while she looked for a job and her own place.  She'd never been allowed to work, so she couldn't save up money and just take off, hoping for the best.  She wouldn't have a clue about how to get a job, how to act on a job, how to budget her money, how to find an apartment...the list is endless. 

No one leaves home perfectly prepared, but Jinger and the other girls are astronomically unprepared.  The only kid who's tried so far is Josh, and that was an epic fail.  At least he managed for a little while, but his own shortcomings, exacerbated by his upbringing, killed his attempt at going his own way.

Back to the interview when Jinger said she'd like to move to a city.  One of her own sisters jumped on that remark instantly and told her she'd get what God gave her and be grateful  for it.  Then Michelle gave a followup interview to say that Jinger just meant she wanted to live closer to Walmart.  JB&M really suck.

[Christina87]

Ughhhh, of course she then jumped in and said she was saving her first kiss until marriage. Still, I'm really only sure that Jessa and Ben are the only "pure" couple. There was a lot of talk leading up to their wedding about how they'd watched movies to see how to kiss, how they were nervous about it, etc. Jill and Derrick and Jinger and Jeremy seem to say things like, "we're saving OUR first kiss for marriage." You know Jeremy has kissed someone before, and even Derrick certainly had, even if it was when he was 13 and played spin the bottle. I do believe he was a virgin though! Jeremy...not so sure. It's a shame that the Duggars make such a big deal about this. If they would just let their kids be normal, no one would speculate on their level of sexual experience!

Edited October 18, 2016 by Christina87

[Sew Sumi]

3 hours ago, Zahdii said:

And the kids, at least some of them, do it too.  Remember when Jinger said she'd like to live in a city when she married?  Poor girl apparently never even considered going to the big city on her own, and thanks to her upbringing she'd have no idea how to go about it anyway.  She had no one she knew that she could stay with while she looked for a job and her own place.  She'd never been allowed to work, so she couldn't save up money and just take off, hoping for the best.  She wouldn't have a clue about how to get a job, how to act on a job, how to budget her money, how to find an apartment...the list is endless. 

No one leaves home perfectly prepared, but Jinger and the other girls are astronomically unprepared.  The only kid who's tried so far is Josh, and that was an epic fail.  At least he managed for a little while, but his own shortcomings, exacerbated by his upbringing, killed his attempt at going his own way.

Back to the interview when Jinger said she'd like to move to a city.  One of her own sisters jumped on that remark instantly and told her she'd get what God gave her and be grateful  for it.  Then Michelle gave a followup interview to say that Jinger just meant she wanted to live closer to Walmart.  JB&M really suck.

When Jill said that Jinger would live where God sent her (paraphrasing), Jinger meekly responded that she had to work on her "contentment." I'll never forget that humiliating moment. I wonder if Jeremy has ever seen that interview.

[YupItsMe]

Maybe Jeremy has seen Jinger's unhappiness and hopes to save her. I can't imagine why else he would be interested in such a young, inexperienced girl.

[Churchhoney]

21 minutes ago, YupItsMe said:

Maybe Jeremy has seen Jinger's unhappiness and hopes to save her. I can't imagine why else he would be interested in such a young, inexperienced girl.

Of course, we also have Jeremy's stated preference for a "meek" woman. And a video of that response -- "I need to work on my contentment"  -- is probably in some dictionary in the sky right next to the term "meek."

So it could go either way, I'm afraid: Either, "Hey, I'm from an urban area -- I can perk this lovely, unhappy woman right up." Or -- "Wow, this is the meekest woman I've ever seen. I can have my own way in everything without even trying in this marriage."

No way to tell at this point, I'd say. Here's hoping for the first.

[Sew Sumi]

IIRC, he said he was taken by this video of Jinger's testimony (taped a few months before Jeremy met Ben and Jessa in TX):

Edited October 18, 2016 by Sew Sumi

[Sew Sumi]

Oh man, I'd forgotten about all the tracts! Ben, fuck you admitting you tip at restaurants with the "million dollar bill."

And the "Good Person Test." Even sanctimonious Ben couldn't pass that with flying colors. 

I wonder what ole Ray "Banana Face" Comfort is up to these days? He used to hang out with Kirky Cameron a lot, but they've both been really quiet lately. 

Edited October 18, 2016 by Sew Sumi

[Malvina]

My dvr says next week is the final episode 10 "The After Show". "The family comes together to relieve some of the most memorable moments from season two." 

[Sew Sumi]

Yeah, we talked about that in the media thread. A "special guest" is also going to appear. We've been speculating. LOL

It's also sad that they couldn't even put together 10 shows worth of vapidness, because they are just THAT boring and repetitive! 

[SmallTownMom]

Heaven help me, I just watched the proposal.  Holy crap, just shut up and propose already!  You don't need to involve 90 other people.  You are a grown man, just do it.  The whole thing was so fake.

[Sew Sumi]

There were taped marks on the ground for them to hit. It was totally (TM) Jill re-enacted for the cameras. 

[Zahdii]

On ‎10‎/‎18‎/‎2016 at 3:21 PM, Malvina said:

My dvr says next week is the final episode 10 "The After Show". "The family comes together to relieve some of the most memorable moments from season two." 

Memorable moments?  People are using this show to treat insomnia! 

Edited October 20, 2016 by Zahdii

[Polliwollidoodle]

I think if the Lord puts it in their blessed hearts to live in NY/NJ they might certainly think about moving in with the grandparents- looked like a good match to me. Jeremy's parents looked too young and normal to be Duggaresque but the grandma has potential.

Please help me as  I didn't watch the full episodes but what was the rational for the trip with so much of the family? I realize of course that they coudl not travel unchaperoned but how did they explain it other than yet another nice perk for the family.

And finally, with the ones back at the homestead fixing up the guest house  (and I would love to see the finished result of the wood stick on the wall that they all thought was brilliant to fill up the wall over the sofa?>>>!!!!)............... who was watching Anna's kids? And where is her hubby nowadays if not on tv? Thank you

[Zahdii]

1 hour ago, mayvenne said:

 who was watching Anna's kids? And where is her hubby nowadays if not on tv? Thank you

Maybe Josh was home with the kids while Anna broke all the Gothard rules and appeared onscreen so they could get a few more bucks.

JB is probably supporting them for the most part now, but it was thought that after Josh and family moved to DC they had their own contract with TLC.  If that contract is still in force, Anna might be the one who can bring more money in to supplement their income.  People still care about her and the kids. 

Or, Anna was brought in to show viewers that she and Josh are still together.  That family really doesn't want a divorce, or rumors of one to sully their pathetic brand.  If they had to suffer through the embarrassment of a divorce, they'd prefer that the divorce happen because of a flaw on the part of their kidult's spouse, not because one of their own kids did something wrong.  Even JB must know that no one would blame Anna for Josh's bad behavior, so there can be no divorce unless an Anna sex tape appears, then all bets are off.

[Sew Sumi]

I think once 19 Kids was canceled, all contracts with Smuggar were null and void. That's why they had to start afresh with a  new show title and new "stars." I hope Anna got paid for that painful baring of the heart she did either in the 3 part special or early in the first season. Otherwise, she's just been on the same level as the other kidults, who are likely earning nominal sums for their parts, save Jana who is in every episode. 

At any rate, even in the 19 Kids era, the kidults MAY have been paid nominal sums out of the rumored $50k they made per episode. Boob and, when featured, Smuggar, made the majority of the coin. 

And now Jinger is eating into an already deflated pie. 

[Natalie68]

On 10/18/2016 at 11:33 AM, Sew Sumi said:

When Jill said that Jinger would live where God sent her (paraphrasing), Jinger meekly responded that she had to work on her "contentment." I'll never forget that humiliating moment. I wonder if Jeremy has ever seen that interview.

The snarky younger sister in me would be reminding Jill of this conversation every time she bitches about Danger America.  Jill, I think you need to live where God sent you and work on your contentment.

[Sew Sumi]

LOL @Natalie68! I mentioned the irony of the contentment thing in another thread and called it #JingersRevenge :D

[Natalie68]

1 minute ago, Sew Sumi said:

LOL @Natalie68! I mentioned the irony of the contentment thing in another thread and called it #JingersRevenge :D

Ha!  Take a weekend off from reading and fall WAY behind!  Great minds and all that!

[GeeGolly]

On 10/18/2016 at 6:21 PM, Malvina said:

My dvr says next week is the final episode 10 "The After Show". "The family comes together to relieve some of the most memorable moments from season two." 

And yet they do that for at least 15 minutes of every show. So I guess they will be discussing their memories of the memories they have already opined on. That along with the teases before, and the same teases after, the commercials, it should make for for all of 5 minutes of new filming. No drinking game here, a funnel will do.

[Sew Sumi]

I hope they rehash the Jana/Jessa dustup. Wanna bet Jessa will phony-laugh (her stupid "heh-heh") the scene off as nothing while Jana sits there nearly in tears?

[louannems]

I can never be sure how Jana really feels.  During a TH with Joy, Joy was gravely declaring Jeremy a Strong Leader.  Jana was staring at Joy, nodding in agreement; yet I did see a slight roll of her eyes.  Is she thinking women actually need a Strong Leader in their menfolk or is she so over all that ?  I like to fantasize that she is over all that!

[GeeGolly]

48 minutes ago, louannems said:

I can never be sure how Jana really feels.  During a TH with Joy, Joy was gravely declaring Jeremy a Strong Leader.  Jana was staring at Joy, nodding in agreement; yet I did see a slight roll of her eyes.  Is she thinking women actually need a Strong Leader in their menfolk or is she so over all that ?  I like to fantasize that she is over all that!

Jana probably can never be sure of how she feels either. Its like they have feelings and then need to translate them into Fundy; eye roll, nod, eye roll, nope, nod is the correct feeling.

Edited October 23, 2016 by GeeGolly