Sex And The City - General Discussion

[ifionlyknew]

4 hours ago, Hiyo said:

But you are occasionally mistaken for one...

With regards to Sam and the delivery guy, the only thing she should be judged for was not locking the door...

And that guy was hot.   Go Samantha. 

2 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

She looked fire!

My all time favorite Samantha look. Stunning.  Pat Field did a phenomenal job dressing her throughout the series. I don't know if there was ever misstep with her wardrobe. On the flip side Carrie sometimes looked like she was wearing costumes.

 

[buttersister]

Quote

That might have been in her contract. That only she be featured in the opening.

Another example of bad judgement or delusion, I always thought she looked like crap throughout the opening. Closeups aren’t flattering and splashed in a tutu looks ludicrous. UNLESS that was all code by SJP saying Carrie is a ridiculous character.😉🤣

[chitowngirl]

I’m watching the first movie on POP. I’m used to seeing it on E! There are many scenes in the POP version that E! edits out. It’s almost like watching a new movie!

[chessiegal]

41 minutes ago, chitowngirl said:

I’m watching the first movie on POP. I’m used to seeing it on E! There are many scenes in the POP version that E! edits out. It’s almost like watching a new movie!

Thanks for the head up. I'm recording it. I'm not surprised about the editing on E! I got so tired of the commercials when I was watching a movie last week, I just recorded it. As I was FFing through the commercials, at one break I counted 12 and the next break 18! No wonder they have to edit.

[Jillybean]

On 8/7/2021 at 2:01 PM, chitowngirl said:

I’m watching the first movie on POP. I’m used to seeing it on E! There are many scenes in the POP version that E! edits out. It’s almost like watching a new movie!

I saw a few minutes of it and noticed this, too. I recently re-watched the entire series on HBOMax (even though I have all seasons on DVD) and although I remembered that E! edited out entire scenes (such as Miranda shopping for the shitty black bra to go with her shitty black dress...so sad they took out this poignant scene), I was reminded of just how much is missed when only watching the edited versions. Sometimes they will just edit one line out of a conversation -- presumably for no reason other than brevity. It's not just nudity and F-bombs that end up on the cutting room floor.

Edited August 9, 2021 by Jillybean

[Hiyo]

 

[buttersister]

One of those entertainment programs showed a trailer for the new stuff. Sound was off, but three things got noticed. Big is grey haired, Miranda’s not a redhead anymore and SJP not looking so fresh. In an interview, I almost didn’t recognize her!

Found part of it.

Edited August 11, 2021 by buttersister

[Jillybean]

20 hours ago, Hiyo said:

 

Oooh, thanks! This was good stuff. Glad most of it was deleted!

This reminded me that it always bugs me that Carrie falling in Dior(?) store is edited out of the E! version.

 

[Ms Blue Jay]

The child who fell in Dior and started weeping is such a far cry from the cool, worldly woman who happily spilled all of her condoms out of her purse and tripped in front of Big in the pilot episode.  Ugh!

13 hours ago, buttersister said:

One of those entertainment programs showed a trailer for the new stuff. Sound was off, but three things got noticed. Big is grey haired, Miranda’s not a redhead anymore and SJP not looking so fresh. In an interview, I almost didn’t recognize her!

Found part of it.

There is a thread for that show.  It's called "And Just Like That".

Edited August 11, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[Ms Blue Jay]

Why did EVERYONE have to leave the club "Bed" just because Carrie screamed at Berger's friends?  🙄     She could have left HERSELF or go hide somewhere for a bit.  God.  Samantha wanted to go there, it was Charlotte's big engagement celebration, and Miranda was finally connecting with a new guy after being so heartbroken over Steve, not to mention just finally feeling sexually confident after giving birth.

I also don't love that Berger suddenly has 3 friends that we've never met before but that Carrie clearly had.  The scene would have had even more impact if we saw that initial meeting where perhaps they were charmed by Carrie or at least thought that she was normal or something.

All that said, I do love this season and this episode.  It's just so easy to pick apart Carrie and I get so much fun out of it.

There's some good Charlotte/Miranda stuff at Charlotte's wedding -- Miranda gives the speech, and Charlotte throws her the bouquet and it hits Miranda in the head.  Foreshadowing!!!

I'm 110% on Carrie's side when it comes to "A Woman's Right to Shoes" but how ironic that Carrie says she doesn't care about the money - $485.  Considering she is borrowing ("borrowing") from Charlotte, maybe she should?!?!?!?  And she just bought these shoes to wear to an indoor party.  Lord, Carrie.

Robert is heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeere :)

Edited August 15, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[Hiyo]

Quote

All that said, I do love this season and this episode.

I really like this episode too, it's always fun to have all 4 of the women out doing something together, for a whole episode.

[Scarlett45]

12 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

I'm 110% on Carrie's side when it comes to "A Woman's Right to Shoes" but how ironic that Carrie says she doesn't care about the money - $485.  Considering she is borrowing ("borrowing") from Charlotte, maybe she should?!?!?!?  And she just bought these shoes to wear to an indoor party.  Lord, Carrie.

 

Yes. I’m sure Carrie had TONS of cute shoes to wear to a party, maybe she shouldn’t have purchased new $500 shoes!!!

[Hiyo]

Remember, she purchased a new pair of shoes for Big's last night in NYC before he moved to Nappa...and this was like 2 or 3 episodes after she borrowed money from Charlotte.

[Ms Blue Jay]

2 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Yes. I’m sure Carrie had TONS of cute shoes to wear to a party, maybe she shouldn’t have purchased new $500 shoes!!!

An indoor birthday party for a child 🙄. Then again, why is Kyra even inviting adults who don't have kids to such a party.  🙄. Maybe I should stop before I sound too judgemental. 

Thanks everyone for indulging me through my rewatch.  HBO in Canada randomly stopped showing the episodes at episode 604 after showing them every night for a year.  I was so upset.   

Edited August 15, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[izabella]

I still don't understand how no one tried to find out who stole the shoes!  Who steals shoes?!  It was one of the guests who did that, someone who was supposedly a friend of the host or wouldn't have been invited.  I'd sure want to know who that was!

[Ms Blue Jay]

2 hours ago, izabella said:

I still don't understand how no one tried to find out who stole the shoes!  Who steals shoes?!  It was one of the guests who did that, someone who was supposedly a friend of the host or wouldn't have been invited.  I'd sure want to know who that was!

How are you not mortified that someone you brought into your home stole the shoes of another person who came into your home?  You're sitting there bragging about your place in the Hamptons with your asshole husband and when Carrie says her $500 shoes were stolen you just shrug your shoulders and give her dirty sneakers?   

The storyline is fun for all of us to get our blood boiling, but is there any reality to it?  It was so unbalanced as to make everyone side with Carrie -- does anyone actually side with Kyra?  I think they wrote Kyra as TOO villainous, but it was in the service of a very interesting point.  Single people are charged with thousands of dollars to celebrate married people's lives in our consumerist/capitalist society.  Single people definitely don't get that respect because a capitalist society does not want to reward the single or the childless because we don't consume enough for a capitalist government's needs.  It's very interesting.

"Bridget Jones Diary" did a great job of showing how single women are judged and harassed for their choices but this episode took it even a step further and added the money element to it.  I have to view Kyra as being merely there to serve the point.  If anyone was like her in real life I would hope that our 4 SATC women would avoid her for the rest of their lives.

Edited August 15, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[RealHousewife]

1 hour ago, izabella said:

I still don't understand how no one tried to find out who stole the shoes!  Who steals shoes?!  It was one of the guests who did that, someone who was supposedly a friend of the host or wouldn't have been invited.  I'd sure want to know who that was!

Me too! There's no one I'd invite into my home I can picture ever stealing shoes. You'd think Kyra would be concerned for her own belongings. If a friend stole Carrie's shoes, she might steal Kyra's own belongings too. 

1 hour ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

How are you not mortified that someone you brought into your home stole the shoes of another person who came into your home?  You're sitting there bragging about your place in the Hamptons with your asshole husband and when Carrie says her $500 shoes were stolen you just shrug your shoulders and give her dirty sneakers?   

The storyline is fun for all of us to get our blood boiling, but is there any reality to it?  It was so unbalanced as to make everyone side with Carrie -- does anyone actually side with Kyra?  I think they wrote Kyra TOO villainous, but it was in the service of a very interesting point.  Single people are charged with thousands of dollars to celebrate married people's lives in our consumerist/capitalist society.  Single people definitely don't get that respect because a capitalist society does not want to reward the single or the childless because we don't consume enough for a capitalist government's needs.  It's very interesting.

"Bridget Jones Diary" did a great job of showing how single women are judged and harassed for their choices but this episode took it even a step further and added the money element to it.  I have to view Kyra as being merely there to serve the point.  If anyone was like her in real life I would hope that our 4 SATC women would avoid her for the rest of their lives.

Exactly! I'd feel horrible. 

Girl, don't get me started on that! One of my biggest pet peeves ever in life is when people say parenthood isn't celebrated and society only values career woman. Um, what?! Single, childfree people are constantly spending money to support and celebrate others' families. Sometimes we do it out of the goodness of our hearts for people we love. Sometimes we're pressured into buying things for coworkers we can't stand. I have no idea how much money I've spent on weddings, being a bridesmaid, bachelorette parties, bridal showers, baby showers, kid birthday parties. Women who have careers may have had a graduation celebration, but that's it. Until we get hitched or pop out some babies, credit for our careers is about it. Even then, people will still say "but she didn't raise kids. Her life is/was easy."

Yeah, I'm not anti-family, and it breaks my heart for any child to be in poverty. I'm not against certain policies to help, but what about single people? There are so many who work hard and need help too. Coupled people are lucky to have someone to split bills with. Rent alone eats up so much of a single person's pay each month. I remember being floored by all these people in Hollywood wanting all moms to be paid $2,400 monthly checks. Um, do they have any clue how hard some people work to make that much? 

I am not a Karen and am pretty easy to please when I'm dining. I was at a restaurant with a friend awhile ago, and we were both completely ignored for the longest time. We couldn't figure out why other than the servers possibly thinking two women wouldn't be worth their time the way the families were. We both have easy orders and tip well without expecting much.

Yeah, we're constantly looked at as if something is wrong with us. People who are married and/or have kids are often applauded even when they're in horrible marriages, their children were surprises, and they are hardly mother of the year. The fact you reproduced means you must be selfless, nurturing, know best, all things good. Single people are just immature, selfish people who need help. 

All of this is why I love SATC so much. The show featured beautiful, intelligent women who had nothing wrong with them but were still single past 30. The show highlighted that single people can be shamed and that parents can be assholes to us. That it can be annoying having to cater to families all the time. I haven't seen another show like it since. 

Edited August 15, 2021 by RealHousewife

[Ms Blue Jay]

6 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

Yeah, we're constantly looked at as if something is wrong with us.

I once had a friend who would have couples' events, and couples' dinners. I didn't stay friends with her for long.  And then on the other hand, I'm invited to parties where almost everyone else IS couples, and that sucks too, so I guess I'm kind of a brat!  It's hard to be single in a couples' world.  

8 minutes ago, RealHousewife said:

All of this is why I love SATC so much. The show featured beautiful, intelligent women who had nothing wrong with them but were still single past 30. The show highlighted that single people can be shamed and that parents can be assholes to us. That it can be annoying having to cater to families all the time. I haven't seen another show like it since. 

Absolutely!  100%.  

[Ms Blue Jay]

More Miranda/Charlotte:  Miranda takes her to the Knicks game that Robert invites her to, and Charlotte confesses to Miranda that Marcus used to be a hustler named "Paul".  Anthony:  "Worst hustler name ever."  😄

[Ms Blue Jay]

ROBERT MAKES ENCHILADAS FOR MIRANDA *AT HER HOUSE* 🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤

WHERE ARE THE MEN LIKE THIS

OMG THE SCENE WHERE ROBERT AND MIRANDA ARE GOING AT IT AND STEVE WALKS IN ON THEM..... OH MY GOD..... THIS IS REALLY HOT!

The scene where Smith tries to hold Samantha's hand and she falls into the stairwell.  If it weren't for those boxes of lettuce (or whatever) SHE WOULD HAVE DIED.  That's so messed up.  I'm at the age where I don't find that funny anymore.  

Edited August 16, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[Ms Blue Jay]

Now comes "One", one of the best, if not the best, episode that this show has ever produced (in my opinion).

Carrie meets Aleksander Petrovsky.  ("You are comic?")

Charlotte has a miscarriage. (Carrie is a great friend here, and Harry is a great husband to call her.)

Miranda and Steve admit their feelings.  (You know how I feel about Steve vs Robert.  But this was really beautifully done, I thought.)

This song plays throughout:

 

Edited August 16, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[BlueMoon81]

3 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Now comes "One", one of the best, if not the best, episode that this show has ever produced (in my opinion).

Carrie meets Aleksander Petrovsky.  ("You are comic?")

Charlotte has a miscarriage. (Carrie is a great friend here, and Harry is a great husband to call her.)

Miranda and Steve admit their feelings.  (You know how I feel about Steve vs Robert.  But this was really beautifully done, I thought.)

This song plays throughout:

 

It took me YEARS to find that amazing score! Someone on YouTube told me about it maybe 2-3 years ago. That melody is amazing and "One" is definitely one of my all time favorite episodes. LOVE when Charlotte, despite being in grief, watches a bio of Elizabeth Taylor and picks herself up, gets dressed (and looks AMAZING) and walks down the street like she owns it. That episode was terrific 

[RealHousewife]

32 minutes ago, BlueMoon81 said:

It took me YEARS to find that amazing score! Someone on YouTube told me about it maybe 2-3 years ago. That melody is amazing and "One" is definitely one of my all time favorite episodes. LOVE when Charlotte, despite being in grief, watches a bio of Elizabeth Taylor and picks herself up, gets dressed (and looks AMAZING) and walks down the street like she owns it. That episode was terrific 

I'm a big Charlotte fan in general, but that was a particularly good episode. I know we gripe about the inconsistencies of the characters, but most of us have different sides. There was so much about Charlotte that was very real to me. She was sweet, but she wasn't an angel. The nicest people I know still have bad days. She was the good girl out of the bunch, but she was still sensual and could be wild. She could get very down during hard times, but she'd pick herself up and keep moving. There were some storylines I didn't care for, but I did really enjoy her throughout the years overall. I thought it was interesting her idol was Elizabeth Taylor, but Patricia Field said she styled her after Jackie Kennedy and Audrey Hepburn.

 

Edited August 16, 2021 by RealHousewife

[Scarlett45]

20 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

An indoor birthday party for a child 🙄. Then again, why is Kyra even inviting adults who don't have kids to such a party.  🙄. Maybe I should stop before I sound too judgemental. 

I get invited to those types of parties all the time. So I didnt think it was odd. I usually end up chatting and serving the elderly guests. It is a nice to chance to catch up and see friends (in non Covid times).

Carrie being invited and going was not weird, her wanting to be reimbursed for her shoes is not weird, but why did she purchase new shoes when she had tons and she owed Charlotte so much money!

 

18 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

Me too! There's no one I'd invite into my home I can picture ever stealing shoes. You'd think Kyra would be concerned for her own belongings. If a friend stole Carrie's shoes, she might steal Kyra's own belongings too. 

YUP! A similar thing happened at a repass when I was little. Someone stole my Great Aunt B's winter coat! At the repass! Left a raggedy coat in its place- my Mom ended up buying her a new coat (she was our nanny). Kyra should've wanted to know WHOM would take Carrie's shoes and violate her home and hospitality that way.

[Ms Blue Jay]

7 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

I thought it was interesting her idol was Elizabeth Taylor, but Patricia Field said she styled her after Jackie Kennedy and Audrey Hepburn.

 

Yeah this feels very Breakfast at Tiffany's to me.

Also when Charlotte tried on her wedding dress, Anthony gasped:  "You're Audrey Hepburn! ---- Owitz."

54 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

Carrie being invited and going was not weird, her wanting to be reimbursed for her shoes is not weird, but why did she purchase new shoes when she had tons and she owed Charlotte so much money!

I was trying to say that it was only an indoor party for children so why she felt the need to buy a new pair of $500 shoes to impress those guests is beyond me.

[Scarlett45]

6 minutes ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

I was trying to say that it was only an indoor party for children so why she felt the need to buy a new pair of $500 shoes to impress those guests is beyond me.

OH I thought you meant why would you invite someone without children to a child's birthday party. Gotcha.

[ifionlyknew]

On 8/14/2021 at 9:29 PM, Ms Blue Jay said:

I also don't love that Berger suddenly has 3 friends that we've never met before but that Carrie clearly had.  The scene would have had even more impact if we saw that initial meeting where perhaps they were charmed by Carrie or at least thought that she was normal or something.

Her blurting out he was bad in bed was stupid.  And very childish.  I really don't think Berger's friends would care if he was bad in bed.  If an ex of one of my friends badmouths them to me I'm not likely to believe anything they have to say.

19 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

It's hard to be single in a couples' world.  

Pre pandemic every Saturday I would go out to lunch by myself while shopping and running errands.  I cannot tell you how many times after telling the hostess it was just me being asked if I wanted to sit at the bar. No thank you I do not want to sit at the bar.  I don't know if I told this story or not.  I went to Maui on vacation by myself a few years back and I did the submarine tour.  The tour guide told everyone to look out the window and see kissing fish and then proceeded to tell everyone to  kiss the person they came with.  So there I sat by myself watching everyone else share kisses.    I'm perfectly happy being single. But every once in awhile something happens and I'm made to feel like I'm out of place.  

19 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

Yeah, we're constantly looked at as if something is wrong with us.

It is always assumed you are not single by choice.  After my husband died I was a relatively young widow at 43.  It wasn't long before people were wanting to know if I would ever get married again. Not wondering if I would date but get married.  I guess they thought I would just move from one husband to the next without taking a break.    In fact at my husband's memorial service a cousin made a scene (which I didn't see and didn't hear about till months later) by announcing she was leaving because I was trying to steal her boyfriend. It should be noted said boyfriend was in his 60s and looked like Shrek.   I was very newly single and I was already judged negatively.  

20 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

. I was at a restaurant with a friend awhile ago, and we were both completely ignored for the longest time. We couldn't figure out why other than the servers possibly thinking two women wouldn't be worth their time the way the families were. We both have easy orders and tip well without expecting much.

This happened to me and a friend once. But it wasn't families she was ignoring us for but tables with men.  I guess she thought she would get better tips from men.

20 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

One of my biggest pet peeves ever in life is when people say parenthood isn't celebrated and society only values career woman.

Well that isn't true.  SATC thankfully showed you could have a fulfilling life single, married, with children and child free.   

21 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

"Bridget Jones Diary" did a great job of showing how single women are judged and harassed for their choices but this episode took it even a step further and added the money element to it. 

I do think single women are judged for how they spend their money.  I told a friend once about something I had bought and she said something like I have to spend my money on my grandkid's Christmas presents. And I thought OK well  you do you and I will do me.  I only judge Carrie's spending because she was irresponsible and had to bully a friend into loaning her money to buy her apartment.  

[buttersister]

Quote

but why did she purchase new shoes when she had tons and she owed Charlotte so much money!

Narcissistic personality disorder?

[Ms Blue Jay]

2 hours ago, ifionlyknew said:

I do think single women are judged for how they spend their money.  I told a friend once about something I had bought and she said something like I have to spend my money on my grandkid's Christmas presents. And I thought OK well  you do you and I will do me.  I only judge Carrie's spending because she was irresponsible and had to bully a friend into loaning her money to buy her apartment.  

Yeah I don't care at all how people spend their money, as long as they don't try to be cheap with me and treat me worse than I treat them!

[izabella]

2 hours ago, ifionlyknew said:

This happened to me and a friend once. But it wasn't families she was ignoring us for but tables with men.  I guess she thought she would get better tips from men.

That happened to me in Vegas at a work conference.  We were all at a "team building" cocktail hour thingie, and the waitress took drink orders from all the male co-workers I was standing with when she came by, and completely ignored me.  She wouldn't even look at me!  One of the guys actually had to order my drink for me when she came back with theirs.  I was stunned. 

[ifionlyknew]

21 minutes ago, izabella said:

That happened to me in Vegas at a work conference.  We were all at a "team building" cocktail hour thingie, and the waitress took drink orders from all the male co-workers I was standing with when she came by, and completely ignored me.  She wouldn't even look at me!  One of the guys actually had to order my drink for me when she came back with theirs.  I was stunned. 

When my husband was alive there were times cashiers and servers ignored me but talked to him.  It was incredibly rude. I don't know if they didn't realize I was the one who handled the money. Needless to say any person ignoring me I'm going to ignore their tip.

[pinkandsparkly13]

17 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

The scene where Smith tries to hold Samantha's hand and she falls into the stairwell.  If it weren't for those boxes of lettuce (or whatever) SHE WOULD HAVE DIED.  That's so messed up.  I'm at the age where I don't find that funny anymore

I always wondered why it seemed like she only hurt her foot. I think a fall like that would really hurt her back! Maybe they just wanted to make her injury simple. 

I did love Carrie's line about Smith being a hand holder, and serving them food. And Smith telling Sam to freaking hold his hand in the end. Ha

[RealHousewife]

4 hours ago, ifionlyknew said:

Her blurting out he was bad in bed was stupid.  And very childish.  I really don't think Berger's friends would care if he was bad in bed.  If an ex of one of my friends badmouths them to me I'm not likely to believe anything they have to say.

Pre pandemic every Saturday I would go out to lunch by myself while shopping and running errands.  I cannot tell you how many times after telling the hostess it was just me being asked if I wanted to sit at the bar. No thank you I do not want to sit at the bar.  I don't know if I told this story or not.  I went to Maui on vacation by myself a few years back and I did the submarine tour.  The tour guide told everyone to look out the window and see kissing fish and then proceeded to tell everyone to  kiss the person they came with.  So there I sat by myself watching everyone else share kisses.    I'm perfectly happy being single. But every once in awhile something happens and I'm made to feel like I'm out of place.  

It is always assumed you are not single by choice.  After my husband died I was a relatively young widow at 43.  It wasn't long before people were wanting to know if I would ever get married again. Not wondering if I would date but get married.  I guess they thought I would just move from one husband to the next without taking a break.    In fact at my husband's memorial service a cousin made a scene (which I didn't see and didn't hear about till months later) by announcing she was leaving because I was trying to steal her boyfriend. It should be noted said boyfriend was in his 60s and looked like Shrek.   I was very newly single and I was already judged negatively.  

This happened to me and a friend once. But it wasn't families she was ignoring us for but tables with men.  I guess she thought she would get better tips from men.

Well that isn't true.  SATC thankfully showed you could have a fulfilling life single, married, with children and child free.   

I do think single women are judged for how they spend their money.  I told a friend once about something I had bought and she said something like I have to spend my money on my grandkid's Christmas presents. And I thought OK well  you do you and I will do me.  I only judge Carrie's spending because she was irresponsible and had to bully a friend into loaning her money to buy her apartment.  

Yes, I think we've discussed this before but, people are so weird about single women. Many women are single by choice. Attractive single women aren't after other people's men vast majority of the time. Everyone needs to relax. 

A lot of the biggest cheapskates I know have been men. So silly to assume they'd tip better.  

Exactly! If Carrie never bullied Charlotte, I don't think any of us would have ever judged her for her spending. My sister was shamed for spending a lot of money on sports events by someone who's married with kids. He made some comment about her not having responsibilities, very rude. She works hard and makes good money. She can spend it on what she wants. It's not like she's a Carrie who's going to spend everything then bully her friends to rescue her. 

[Hiyo]

Quote

Narcissistic personality disorder?

Yup, that pretty much covered Carrie post-season 3.

[Ms Blue Jay]

Single by choice or NOT by choice, either way, they should be treated with respect. Whether someone is a Samantha and doesn't care at all or whether someone is like Charlotte and wants nothing more to be married.  Either choice deserves the same respect and people should just mind their own business.

[qtpye]

12 hours ago, ifionlyknew said:

Her blurting out he was bad in bed was stupid.  And very childish.  I really don't think Berger's friends would care if he was bad in bed.  If an ex of one of my friends badmouths them to me I'm not likely to believe anything they have to say.

Pre pandemic every Saturday I would go out to lunch by myself while shopping and running errands.  I cannot tell you how many times after telling the hostess it was just me being asked if I wanted to sit at the bar. No thank you I do not want to sit at the bar.  I don't know if I told this story or not.  I went to Maui on vacation by myself a few years back and I did the submarine tour.  The tour guide told everyone to look out the window and see kissing fish and then proceeded to tell everyone to  kiss the person they came with.  So there I sat by myself watching everyone else share kisses.    I'm perfectly happy being single. But every once in awhile something happens and I'm made to feel like I'm out of place.  

It is always assumed you are not single by choice.  After my husband died I was a relatively young widow at 43.  It wasn't long before people were wanting to know if I would ever get married again. Not wondering if I would date but get married.  I guess they thought I would just move from one husband to the next without taking a break.    In fact at my husband's memorial service a cousin made a scene (which I didn't see and didn't hear about till months later) by announcing she was leaving because I was trying to steal her boyfriend. It should be noted said boyfriend was in his 60s and looked like Shrek.   I was very newly single and I was already judged negatively.  

This happened to me and a friend once. But it wasn't families she was ignoring us for but tables with men.  I guess she thought she would get better tips from men.

Well that isn't true.  SATC thankfully showed you could have a fulfilling life single, married, with children and child free.   

I do think single women are judged for how they spend their money.  I told a friend once about something I had bought and she said something like I have to spend my money on my grandkid's Christmas presents. And I thought OK well  you do you and I will do me.  I only judge Carrie's spending because she was irresponsible and had to bully a friend into loaning her money to buy her apartment.  

Well, no wonder your cousin was insecure dating that type of beautiful man, but seriously, she seems like the worst.

10 hours ago, izabella said:

That happened to me in Vegas at a work conference.  We were all at a "team building" cocktail hour thingie, and the waitress took drink orders from all the male co-workers I was standing with when she came by, and completely ignored me.  She wouldn't even look at me!  One of the guys actually had to order my drink for me when she came back with theirs.  I was stunned. 

 

9 hours ago, ifionlyknew said:

When my husband was alive there were times cashiers and servers ignored me but talked to him.  It was incredibly rude. I don't know if they didn't realize I was the one who handled the money. Needless to say any person ignoring me I'm going to ignore their tip.

When I was in college I went out a couple of times with my boyfriend to run some errands. I would hand the cashier some money and then they would actually hand the change back to my boyfriend as to not offend him.

Why the fuck would he be offended?

It was my money. It was like even when doing the most mundane things...the man's feelings always take precedent over giving the woman some basic courtesy.

8 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

Yes, I think we've discussed this before but, people are so weird about single women. Many women are single by choice. Attractive single women aren't after other people's men vast majority of the time. Everyone needs to relax. 

A lot of the biggest cheapskates I know have been men. So silly to assume they'd tip better.  

Exactly! If Carrie never bullied Charlotte, I don't think any of us would have ever judged her for her spending. My sister was shamed for spending a lot of money on sports events by someone who's married with kids. He made some comment about her not having responsibilities, very rude. She works hard and makes good money. She can spend it on what she wants. It's not like she's a Carrie who's going to spend everything then bully her friends to rescue her. 

Exactly, it is about having respect for her friend not being judgmental about how she chooses to spend her money.

6 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Single by choice or NOT by choice, either way, they should be treated with respect. Whether someone is a Samantha and doesn't care at all or whether someone is like Charlotte and wants nothing more to be married.  Either choice deserves the same respect and people should just mind their own business.

People are disturbed by women actually doing something for themselves and not putting everyone else ahead of them.

That women might choose to live a life by themselves and for themselves (like many single men do all the time) rocks them to their core.

The truth is that for many generations, the work women have done as caregivers (this is also including many poor women who also had no choice but to also work outside the home as well to provide financial support) has totally been taken for granted.

Women did most of the work but were often looked upon as burdens because the patriarchy likes to pat itself on the back on how well it takes care of the "little ladies".

Now that women actually have good options and do not have to spend their lives in the service of others, we all of a sudden have a crisis, as many of those caregiver jobs are empty and expensive to fill.

 

 

Edited August 17, 2021 by qtpye

[Ms Blue Jay]

Miranda is at her most annoying after she breaks up with Robert for Steve.  🙄  What exactly was the point of telling Steve that "no man has ever been as deep" as Robert?!  Since when does Miranda get such a big head about herself?

Edited August 17, 2021 by Ms Blue Jay

[qtpye]

19 minutes ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Miranda is at her most annoying after she breaks up with Robert for Steve.  🙄  What exactly was the point of telling Steve that "no man has ever been as deep" as Robert?!  Since when does Miranda get such a big head about herself?

It might have been just another low-key way to humiliate Miranda.

Miranda finally gets to date a handsome/successful and actually dumps him.

She thinks they had such an amazing connection and that she broke his heart while we the audience and Steve know that he is having threesomes with other women and not really thinking about her. 

[Ms Blue Jay]

28 minutes ago, qtpye said:

It might have been just another low-key way to humiliate Miranda.

Yes, the writers had her repeat that he's "crazy in love with her" like 3 times that episode.  🙄

One of my all time favourite scenes from the show is Miranda telling the women that she proposed to Steve.  I rewind Charlotte's "Ohh, Miranda" like 10 times each time.  And Charlotte's expression at Samantha crying is so funny too.

[ifionlyknew]

11 hours ago, qtpye said:

She thinks they had such an amazing connection and that she broke his heart while we the audience and Steve know that he is having threesomes with other women and not really thinking about her. 

 

10 hours ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Yes, the writers had her repeat that he's "crazy in love with her" like 3 times that episode.  

Yes why did Miranda think Robert would be devastated that she broke up with him?  He liked her but he didn't act like he was head over heels in love with her.  Giant cookie notwithstanding. 

[Ms Blue Jay]

Maybe Robert was falling in love but he wasn't even ready to say the words yet.  He never acted "crazy".  His scene of ranting at Miranda in the stairwell is also one of my all time favourites.  I know that some people find it out of line or a turn off but I think it's fucking hysterical.  I was discussing SATC recently and Blair Underwood really had a great arc on this show after the pathetic one-off they did to Chivon in Season 3.  Robert was a real character and Blair was so sexy, funny, and good in the role.  

[Scarlett45]

14 minutes ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

Maybe Robert was falling in love but he wasn't even ready to say the words yet.  He never acted "crazy".  His scene of ranting at Miranda in the stairwell is also one of my all time favourites.  I know that some people find it out of line or a turn off but I think it's fucking hysterical.  I was discussing SATC recently and Blair Underwood really had a great arc on this show after the pathetic one-off they did to Chivon in Season 3.  Robert was a real character and Blair was so sexy, funny, and good in the role.  

I loved arc too. I think Robert did like Miranda but he wasnt as invested in the relationship as she assumed he was.

[ifionlyknew]

15 minutes ago, Ms Blue Jay said:

I was discussing SATC recently and Blair Underwood really had a great arc on this show after the pathetic one-off they did to Chivon in Season 3.  Robert was a real character and Blair was so sexy, funny, and good in the role.  

Yes. Robert was a character who just  happened to be black. Chivon was a black character.

Years ago I dated a guy who's ex was related to Blair Underwood. I have always found him so incredibly sexy. 

[Ms Blue Jay]

Blair also played a love interest of Julia Louis Dreyfus's on "The New Adventures of Old Christine".  It's the same as this show, it starts out amazing, but he's too famous/expensive so they had to create some terrible reason to drive them apart.  I love that show too.  He was really good on "In Treatment" too.

[ifionlyknew]

https://www.yahoo.com/news/sex-city-episode-where-carrie-215102170.html

Is someone reading this board?  Lol

[Jillybean]

4 hours ago, ifionlyknew said:

https://www.yahoo.com/news/sex-city-episode-where-carrie-215102170.html

Is someone reading this board?  Lol

Interesting article. I was 45 when I got married and didn't want gifts. We avoided the whole thing by telling almost no one we were getting married and only inviting 7 people (my family) to the wedding. I spent most of my 20s and especially my 30s thinking marriage wasn't in the cards for me, but it didn't occur to me to worry about parties or gifts or celebrating accomplishments in some big way. I definitely get the premise and as someone who was unmarried for so long, I agree to a point that we disproprtionately celebrate weddings and babies. It just doesn't really bother me, but I haven't spent much money or time on such celebrations (most of my closest friends are child-free). In Carrie's case, I wouldn't have gone to the baby shower of a formerly close friend. That being said, Kyra was an asshole and Carrie was right to collect, but shouldn't have had to go about it the way she did.

Anyway, there's always a choice.

[ifionlyknew]

38 minutes ago, Jillybean said:

In Carrie's case, I wouldn't have gone to the baby shower of a formerly close friend.

Stanford was invited too. So I'm guessing they knew Kyra a long time ago since the other women didn't seem to be friends with her.    This was the couple's third child so I thought it was odd they were having a party where gifts were brought.   Usually you have a shower for the first kid but not any after that.  

[T Summer]

Most people are single, it turns out!

I found out something fascinating after someone stated earlier in the thread that when SATC originally aired   about 92% of the population was married [might have said expected to be married]. That seemed a little high to me so just out of curiosity I Googled marriage rates in 1996 and the first source gave them as 52%. It varied from 52%-60% depending on the source.

I searched again just now and  a Pew Research article  from 2011  (the 1st one), titled "Barely Half of U.S. Adults Are Married- A Record Low" came up. Rates have only gotten lower over the past decade.

My mind was blown!  Are you as surprised as I was?

________________________________________________________________________

P.S. I usually see SATC reruns on  the E channel and I just came across one (s3 e3) on BRAVO which was running in it's unedited form. I'd forgotten how raw some of the language was!

[Scarlett45]

16 hours ago, T Summer said:

Most people are single, it turns out!

I found out something fascinating after someone stated earlier in the thread that when SATC originally aired   about 92% of the population was married [might have said expected to be married]. That seemed a little high to me so just out of curiosity I Googled marriage rates in 1996 and the first source gave them as 52%. It varied from 52%-60% depending on the source.

I searched again just now and  a Pew Research article  from 2011  (the 1st one), titled "Barely Half of U.S. Adults Are Married- A Record Low" came up. Rates have only gotten lower over the past decade.

My mind was blown!  Are you as surprised as I was?

________________________________________________________________________

P.S. I usually see SATC reruns on  the E channel and I just came across one (s3 e3) on BRAVO which was running in it's unedited form. I'd forgotten how raw some of the language was!

I think the “92%” during SATC’s airing was the stats of adults who were either married or had been married. So it was counting divorced or widowed people. And of course the older a population is the more likely it would be that people who lived a typical lifespan would have been married. 
 

No I am not surprised only half of USA adults are married. The boomer generation is firmly into their senior years, younger generations are more likely to be single or just live together than even 30yrs ago. 
 

I think for the women of Carrie’s generation they wouldn’t have seen a lot of married single women with aspirational lives. Most women were expected to be married at some point, now I don’t think that’s the case. 

[Black Knight]

Rebecca Traister published her book All the Single Ladies: Unmarried Women and the Rise of an Independent Nation back in 2016. It's a great read, digging into the history as well as present-day. I bet both Sam and Miranda would have copies.