S06.E19: Goodbye, Dubai

[Wings]

Oh I meant the one where he was talking to LVP on the phone and David said Ken's tits were better and bigger.  I agree she did bring up the various mutilations she was subjecting herself to, and apparently the concept of wearing a bra escapes her.

 

I don't remember that.  What was the context of saying that about Ken.   Ken must have made a comment that struck David as if were coming from a woman's stand point?   LVP was talking to David on the phone?  What was the context?  

Edited April 11, 2016 by wings707

[biakbiak]

I don't remember that.  What was the context of saying that about Ken.   Ken must have made a comment that struck David as if were coming from a woman's stand point?   LVP was talking to David on the phone?  What was the context?

Lisa called the hospital after Yo's surgery to see how she was doing and David said that now Ken had bigger breasts than Yo, David brought it up.

[WireWrap]

Lisa called the hospital after Yo's surgery to see how she was doing and David said that now Ken had bigger breasts than Yo, David brought it up.

He was trying to make a joke, it was a very bad joke and not at all funny but it was supposed to make both Lisa AND Yolanda laugh. Giant FAIL though! LOL

[biakbiak]

He was trying to make a joke, it was a very bad joke and not at all funny but it was supposed to make both Lisa AND Yolanda laugh. Giant FAIL though! LOL

Oh I realized it was intended as a joke, it's just that the only context for mentioning Ken was because he was talking to Lisa. I imagine he made that "joke" to every one of Yo's partnered friends that called, just changing the name.

[Wings]

Lisa called the hospital after Yo's surgery to see how she was doing and David said that now Ken had bigger breasts than Yo, David brought it up.

 

Now that was funny and hardly snark worthy!  She just had her implants removed!  Both he and Yolanda were joking about it.   

[Yours Truly]

But they aren't "friends", Yolanda is not friends with LisaV, Kyle, Rinna or Kathryn and never has been. They are co-workers and nothing more and for her to keep snipping at them about how she determines friendship is ridiculous and again, it is a calculated move especially since she is using her "illness" as the ruler to measure them by and beat them with it. 

 

None of the women "gossiped" about her kids, she made a startling announcement about 2 of them being seriously ill which took them all by surprise, especially LisaV who is close to them in real life. I see nothing wrong about Lisa talking to Mohammed, their father, her real friend about what Yolanda announced on the show and there was nothing nefarious in what Lisa said that he told her.

Her sicki selfies are laughable IMO. And that is because we all know she is lying about the extent of her illness and the claims she has made on her social media pages.

I also disagree that Yolanda has been a "target' and that she never targets the others. Yolanda has targeted LisaV several times this season alone and she gets on her high horse when anyone asks her any questions. She says they can ask her but them says a "real" friend wouldn't ask. She can't have it both ways.

 

And, NO, Yolanda doesn't get to dictate how the others should to be there for her, they all have lives, very busy lives that include their own families and some have  business they need to attend every. single. day., unlike Yolanda, who doesn't work outside of filming this show.

Never said she's never targeted others. I did mention that she had about the same amount of annoying qualities the others have which is why she was cast for the show.

 

Well I know that I get to dictate to people how I expect to be treated if they plan on having ANY association with me. Yolanda can't FORCE the other women to do as she says but she can very well be disturbed and disappointed by it according to what she requires in her life and friendships.  We all have that right and that is her right. I personally think there's some justification there. They could either take it or leave it but some of them choose the ride the fence and I think that's the part that Yolanda keeps trying to address.  I really could give a flying fig about this whole "people have lives" excuse. We all do but there's always room for compassion and kindness or at least there should be. As to the whole "their coworkers not friends" well alright then, then why are they taking this whole "we were just oh so concerned for you and your health and it was all about our very genuine feeling for you and your wellbeing". If they aren't close enough for Yolanda to expect anything besides surface efforts then they aren't close enough to her to justify the chatter that came about due to "friendly and genuine concern" for her health.  Can't have it both ways.

 

Simple Definition of gossip

1 information about the behavior and personal lives of other people

 2 a person who often talks about the private details of other people's lives

Edited April 11, 2016 by Yours Truly

[Yours Truly]

We create the environment that we desire and need.  That is our responsibility and that comes down to how we treat others.  It never works to demand anything from anyone.  Be the person who draws support to you.  What you put out comes back to you.  

Not always. Sometimes you actually have to spell it out. Actually it's more common for people to keep quiet and let disappointment fester into resentment because we advocate not complaining or sharing "selfish" needs. It's a backwards recipe that I think Yolanda doesn't agree with either. She's up front with what she expects and I don't see anything wrong with being straight about it and not pussy footing around it with demur etiquette. It also gives the lazy one's an excuse to not put forth any efforts cause they can always count on not being called out on their minimal efforts. It's such a common flaw in our societies views of social interaction. It's geared to look down on perceived weakness and anything that would require more altruistic behavior. Sad, sad, sad.

Edited April 11, 2016 by Yours Truly

[WireWrap]

Never said she's never targeted others. I did mention that she had about the same amount of annoying qualities the others have which is why she was cast for the show.

 

Well I know that I get to dictate to people how I expect to be treated if they plan on having ANY association with me. Yolanda can't FORCE the other women to do as she says but she can very well be disturbed and disappointed by it according to what she requires in her life and friendships.  We all have that right and that is her right. I personally think there's some justification there. They could either take it or leave it but some of them choose the ride the fence and I think that's the part that Yolanda keeps trying to address.  I really could give a flying fig about this whole "people have lives" excuse. We all do but there's always room for compassion and kindness or at least there should be. As to the whole "their coworkers not friends" well alright then, then why are they taking this whole "we were just oh so concerned for you and your health and it was all about our very genuine feeling for you and your wellbeing". If they aren't close enough for Yolanda to expect anything besides surface efforts then they aren't close enough to her to justify the chatter that came about due to "friendly and genuine concern" for her health.  Can't have it both ways.

 

Simple Definition of gossip

1 information about the behavior and personal lives of other people

 2 a person who often talks about the private details of other people's lives

Balderdash, Yolanda is doing this for viewer sympathy and nothing else.

[jinjer]

Well Linda Thompson had some not so nice things to say about David, Yolanda almost ripped Taylor's head off when she brought that up.  No one really knows what went on in their marriage.  That Yo had to hush the whole room when My Love played is a good indication that David wasn't an innocent in the downfall of that marriage.  Yo hasn't said that much that is negative about David publicly. In fact, she said he has supported her tremendously through her journey, and her daughters "liked" that tweet.  I think he checked out and she was too needy.  He hasn't been married 4 times for nothing. I am sure there was plenty of blame to go around.  They seem to be managing to divorce without blaming each other, so far.  I haven't seen the episode yet.

[Wings]

Not always. Sometimes you actually have to spell it out. Actually it's more common for people to keep quiet and let disappointment fester into resentment because we advocate not complaining or sharing "selfish" needs. It's a backwards recipe that I think Yolanda doesn't agree with either. She's up front with what she expects and I don't see anything wrong with being straight about it and not pussy footing around it with demur etiquette. It also gives the lazy one's an excuse to not put forth any efforts cause they can always count on not being called out on their minimal efforts. It's such a common flaw in our societies views of social interaction. It's geared to look down on perceived weakness and anything that would require more altruistic behavior. Sad, sad, sad.

 

 

There are ways to reach out and ask for help and support when you need it.  Lots of ways that are respectful and still direct.  People respond kindly to a sincere request.  "You never come to see me and I have been bedridden staring at the ceiling for  18 months!"  is not the way to get the response you seek. 

Treat others as you want to be treated.  That old golden rule holds wisdom that works.  

 

How about, I am feeling isolated, ill and depressed because I am too exhausted to get up and out.  I would love for you to stop by and pay me a visit.  I will have Daisy make us a nice lunch and some tea.  

[WireWrap]

There are ways to reach out and ask for help and support when you need it.  Lots of ways that are respectful and still direct.  People respond kindly to a sincere request.  "You never come to see me and I have been bedridden staring at the ceiling for  18 months!"  is not the way to get the response you seek. 

Treat others as you want to be treated.  That old golden rule holds wisdom that works.  

 

How about, I am feeling isolated, ill and depressed because I am too exhausted to get up and out.  I would love for you to stop by and pay me a visit.  I will have Daisy make us a nice lunch and some tea.  

How about "I miss you and would so enjoy a visit with you, how about you come over for lunch?"  Don't expect people to read your dam mind and then get mad at them when they don't. And, when someone calls/texts to come visit you set a time up that is conducive to their schedule, not just yours and don't just blow them off every. single. time. like Yolanda did.

[homeperm]

There are ways to reach out and ask for help and support when you need it.  Lots of ways that are respectful and still direct.  People respond kindly to a sincere request.  "You never come to see me and I have been bedridden staring at the ceiling for  18 months!"  is not the way to get the response you seek. 

Treat others as you want to be treated.  That old golden rule holds wisdom that works.  

 

How about, I am feeling isolated, ill and depressed because I am too exhausted to get up and out.  I would love for you to stop by and pay me a visit.  I will have Daisy make us a nice lunch and some tea.  

Very nice example, Wings707. Beyond that, if someone asks a person to do something, they need to be prepared to hear that that person can't fulfill the request. Maybe I'm luckier than most, but I have never needed to make demands of my friends and I've never had a friend demand that I do anything. Friends, as I understand it, don't do that. I don't have any friends like Yolanda, so I don't actually have any experience with such a person. If I became acquainted with Yolanda, it would never go further than that. I find her repulsive. Not gonna lie, though. I'd gossip about her. She does a lot of weird shit.

And you know what? People gossip. Always have. Always will. I don't pretend to be better than everyone else and I try to live in the real world.

[zoeysmom]

I don't remember that.  What was the context of saying that about Ken.   Ken must have made a comment that struck David as if were coming from a woman's stand point?   LVP was talking to David on the phone?  What was the context?  

LVP had sent flowers and was calling from the Hamptons to check on Yolanda.  He offered that Ken had bigger and better tits than Yolanda post syurgery.  It was one of those oopsie moments.  

Edited April 11, 2016 by zoeysmom

[motorcitymom65]

How about "I miss you and would so enjoy a visit with you, how about you come over for lunch?"  Don't expect people to read your dam mind and then get mad at them when they don't. And, when someone calls/texts to come visit you set a time up that is conducive to their schedule, not just yours and don't just blow them off every. single. time. like Yolanda did.

Yes, exactly. The problem with Yo is that she is all about making everyone feel guilty all the time. Why not pose it in a way that makes it clear that she wants to spend time with them? That she misses them? That she wants to hear what is going on in their lives? We all know people that spend the time we have with them bitching and complaining about how nobody ever comes to visit them. They make each and every experience painful.

Probably the one and only time I ever liked Yo was last year when she vacationed with Kyle and her family. With the exception of Brandi, I had never before seen her show any interest in anyone else or their lives. Her only interest prior to that seemed to be of the condescending sort. I remember how she was with Taylor (I know, I know, no one likes Taylor). She was going through a rough patch, but Yo had zero sympathy. She thought she was disgusting because she was drunk, and made the comment that maybe a women with her issues needed to be at home taking care of her daughter, not out and about making everyone uncomfortable.

When she was traveling with Kyle, they had that very beautiful few moments when they were sunning themselves; before the news of Bella's arrest came to be known. She listened to Kyle talk about her fears and worries for her daughter's as they grew up and moved away, and she shared her own feelings about her kids. It was the first real give and take I ever saw Yo engage in, where she seemed interested in what someone else might be going through. I've never seen that part of Yo before. She never asks about anyone else, never shows any interest in anyone else. It is always all about her. It is exhausting.

[WaltersHair]

I've been reading more and more about UAE and jailing people for months for seemingly minor infractions. The number of f-bombs dropped in these past few episodes would have all the wives in jail if anyone were really listening.

 

here's a story on MSN just today

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/world/us-woman-jailed-for-insulting-united-arab-emirates/ar-BBrCCM3?li=BBnb7Kz

[ElDosEquis]

 

How about, I am feeling isolated, ill and depressed because I am too exhausted to get up and out.  I would love for you to stop by and pay me a visit.  I will have Daisy make us a nice lunch and some tea.  

 

Can I have lemonade, instead of tea?

Edited April 12, 2016 by ElDosEquis

[Giselle]

I've been reading more and more about UAE and jailing people for months for seemingly minor infractions. The number of f-bombs dropped in these past few episodes would have all the wives in jail if anyone were really listening.

 

here's a story on MSN just today

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/world/us-woman-jailed-for-insulting-united-arab-emirates/ar-BBrCCM3?li=BBnb7Kz

 

 

Which is why they filmed in white bread tourist areas and private rented venues away from any real cultural places where locals wouldn't look kindly. For their trip to the souk I bet they each had a handler to stop short any F bombs or unacceptable behaviors.

[Wings]

Which is why they filmed in white bread tourist areas and private rented venues away from any real cultural places where locals wouldn't look kindly. For their trip to the souk I bet they each had a handler to stop short any F bombs or unacceptable behaviors.

 

I believe they were protected by the government because they didn't want anything bad airing on US TV.  They probably shut down that building (name escapes me) for the filming.  

Edited April 12, 2016 by wings707

[WaltersHair]

Which is why they filmed in white bread tourist areas and private rented venues away from any real cultural places where locals wouldn't look kindly. For their trip to the souk I bet they each had a handler to stop short any F bombs or unacceptable behaviors.

If this trip was meant to be an advertisement for Dubai, it backfired (for me) in a spectacular fashion. All the episodes served to do was make me Google the UAE which provided story after story of what bad thing can happen to you while there. Personally, I'd never go even though I might be in their target audience.

Edited to add, I realize this has been covered in the thread by others, but felt the need to express my astonishment and hoping Bravo realizes their mistake. Well, I can hope.

Edited April 12, 2016 by WaltersHair

[bref]

I might add to the list of "better ways to get your friends to want to spend time with you when you're sick", don't passively-aggressively criticize what they brought as a gift and don't react to being told you look good as if it's an insult.

[JenFromCincy]

While I'm not the most overtly compassionate person in the world (or in this forum for that matter), I just can't muster any for Yolanda.  She's haughty and lives in a world of absolutes and extremes.  Nothing ever seems to be good enough for her.  If she complains that people don't text her and keep in contact and they modify their behavior and text her, then texting is meaningless and they don't call.  If they start calling, that isn't enough and they're not coming over.  She moves the bar constantly on friendship requirements.  That would be exhausting.  I get that everyone has different needs and different views on what constitutes friendship, but you can't keep changing the goal posts and say the other person isn't holding up their end.  She's a joy sucker pretending to be a zen master and should spend less time analyzing her friends and do a little introspection.

[Yours Truly]

There are ways to reach out and ask for help and support when you need it.  Lots of ways that are respectful and still direct.  People respond kindly to a sincere request.  "You never come to see me and I have been bedridden staring at the ceiling for  18 months!"  is not the way to get the response you seek. 

Treat others as you want to be treated.  That old golden rule holds wisdom that works.  

 

How about, I am feeling isolated, ill and depressed because I am too exhausted to get up and out.  I would love for you to stop by and pay me a visit.  I will have Daisy make us a nice lunch and some tea.  

But why does a person that's battling an illness have to try so hard? Word it correctly? Get it just right? Like most people have pointed out. Most people are accustomed to actually not saying anything at all for fear of putting too much of their problems out there and on others. Most people want who are ill want to be spared the task of actually BEGGING oh, excuse me "reaching out" for love, support, caring and attention. The true etiquette lies, not with the person who is ill but with those around them. It's because of this whole "people have lives" mantra, which sweeps the nation, that we've become accustomed to "taking what we get" for fear of coming across in the way Yolanda is being painted. Someone who is ill is supposed to just be at the mercy of whatever others can scrape together in terms of what they can give and never based on what the afflicted person would love to receive. Ever notice how sad that is? And when we do come across someone willing to be honest about that imbalance she's the one criticized because she's not expressing it in the humble, tentative way that is expected or to put it simply "she hasn't asked nicely". I think the reason she's isn't is because it's a bit corny to have to ask at all.  I just think that society as a whole handle illness in very callous ways and God help anyone who asserts themselves and vocalizes how offensive it feels to be guilted for wanting people to genuinely care and make an effort WITHOUT prompting. Most people would LOVE shows of support. Some say they are the opposite but even people respecting your need for minimal attention would again BE signs of support because they care enough to deliver the support YOU in particular are needing. I know that Yolanda has unlikable traits but I don't think that should mean that she abandon her views on friendships and support. I don't think her views are all that outrageous to be honest and I don't think that she should feel bad about feeling how she feels. If the other women didn't constantly bring her up or talk about her then I doubt Yolanda would be constantly babbling about what she thinks of them and their hollywood friendships as often as she's been commenting on it. They just gave her new ammo to keep blathering on about them because well they keep blathering on about her. Lol.

[Yours Truly]

While I'm not the most overtly compassionate person in the world (or in this forum for that matter), I just can't muster any for Yolanda.  She's haughty and lives in a world of absolutes and extremes.  Nothing ever seems to be good enough for her.  If she complains that people don't text her and keep in contact and they modify their behavior and text her, then texting is meaningless and they don't call.  If they start calling, that isn't enough and they're not coming over.  She moves the bar constantly on friendship requirements.  That would be exhausting.  I get that everyone has different needs and different views on what constitutes friendship, but you can't keep changing the goal posts and say the other person isn't holding up their end.  She's a joy sucker pretending to be a zen master and should spend less time analyzing her friends and do a little introspection.

See I keep seeing things like this. I don't ever remember seeing Yolanda displaying such an inconsistent stance on friendship. She's pretty much expressed the same sentiment season after season. I don't remember any situation where someone delivered something in the form of a friendship and then she decided it wasn't good enough. I do believe that Yolanda has been very particular since day one. I don't think her position has changed since then the only thing that has changed is where she's at now with her illness which is apparently more of a struggle than before. But I never got the impression that she's shifted the goals posts. I've always felt that she's a demanding friend so I'm not surprised one bit that in light of her illness she's doing more of what she does and that's expecting her friends to be her kind of supportive.

 

The same way I'm supportive to my friend in Texas differently than I'm supportive to the friend I have in NY. Both are very dear friends but both are complete opposites. The one in Texas is my rock. Hardly ever calls to vent or ask for a shoulder but is usually my soothing peace. Whereas the one in NY will once in a while scold me for being out of touch.  Go in on me about dropping the friendship ball and pretty much let's me have it when she feels I've been a neglectful friend but she's also been my rock too.  I know that I have to be at the ready to be by her side if ever the need arises cause she would take great offense and that's the type of friendship she expects and demands to have in her life. I've decided long ago and for many many many reasons she's worth it and if that's what she requires then by golly that's what I'll deliver.  It's about different needs for different people not some blanket rule book of friendship.

 

I also believe that Yolanda's point throughout the season is that they aren't her friends so the feigned concern is offensive to her. That's pretty much what I think it boils down to.

[JenFromCincy]

People having lives isn't a mantra, it's reality.  Unless it's your family, what is the expectation here?  We all go through things.  Maybe it's not illness, but it's stuff.  Everyone has to deal and balance what life throws at you.  If you're alone and no one is coming, then there's a chance that you didn't do enough nurturing of friendships or building relationships prior to the current circumstance.  Family should step up first and be there, friends and church communities should be next, and then charities for those with none of the above.  Since when does being sick get you a free pass on being a decent human being? You should take what you can get in life, because no one owes you squat.  If you are fortunate enough to have people that make time for you, be grateful for it.  Nurture it.  Return the favor.  Because no one outside of a reincarnation of Mother Teresa is going to let you take their kindness and sincere goodwill, beat them over the head with it, and then stick around for more.  That's asinine.

 

As for Yolanda, she did complain about LVP being a Hollywood friend and not staying in touch.  Then when Lisa texted Yo to have a good time at the painting party, she called her and scolded her for not calling.  Then she scolded her for not coming to see her and only sending texts and flowers.  That's a change in expectations.  LVP is literal.  You tell her to do something, that's what she does.  She doesn't read subtext and shouldn't have to. 

 

Expecting people around you to be psychic and not only knowing your needs but fulfilling them is delusional.  No one who is dealing with career, family, and all life puts in your path has the time to hone in that kind of vaguery. That doesn't mean they lack compassion.  It's that your expectations exceed normal human ability.

Edited April 12, 2016 by JenFromCincy

[Yours Truly]

People having lives isn't a mantra, it's reality.  Unless it's your family, what is the expectation here?  We all go through things.  Maybe it's not illness, but it's stuff.  Everyone has to deal and balance what life throws at you.  If you're alone and no one is coming, then there's a chance that you didn't do enough nurturing of friendships or building relationships prior to the current circumstance.  Family should step up first and be there, friends and church communities should be next, and then charities for those with none of the above.  Since when does being sick get you a free pass on being a decent human being? You should take what you can get in life, because no one owes you squat.  If you are fortunate enough to have people that make time for you, be grateful for it.  Nurture it.  Return the favor.  Because no one outside of a reincarnation of Mother Teresa is going to let you take their kindness and sincere goodwill, beat them over the head with it, and then stick around for more.  That's asinine.

 

As for Yolanda, she did complain about LVP being a Hollywood friend and not staying in touch.  Then when Lisa texted Yo to have a good time at the painting party, she called her and scolded her for not calling.  Then she scolded her for not coming to see her and only sending texts and flowers.  That's a change in expectations.  LVP is literal.  You tell her to do something, that's what she does.  She doesn't read subtext and shouldn't have to. 

 

Expecting people around you to be psychic and not only knowing your needs but fulfilling them is delusional.  No one who is dealing with career, family, and all life puts in your path has the time to hone in that kind of vaguery. That doesn't mean they lack compassion.  It's that your expectations exceed normal human ability.

Which is exactly what my NY friend would have done to me. Texting isn't always acceptable. It depends on the circumstances. Some things DESERVE phone calls. I think Yolanda's guidelines can be tedious but still in the realm of understandable. Also, what I've always gotten from Yolanda is that she's questioned LVP's sincerity and considering how LVP comes across I'm not entirely inclined to fault Yolanda for that. I think Yolanda's always looked really closely to how people are playing their hand and if they are trying to using surface friendships as a way to paint themselves in a certain light then she doesn't plan on being the recipient of such a ruse. I've always seen Yolanda as someone who isn't going to allow the mechanics of the show distort certain things for the sake of ratings and footage. Oh sure, make no mistake she's willing to play the game but only with certain subjects. Apparently friendships are serious business to her and didn't want to cross too far into frenemies territory for the sake of the show. I think instead of frenemies she would rather keep you at arms length, make it clear that you don't fall into friendship category and if anyone wants that to change then leave the bullshit reality show stuff at the door and join her behind the scenes where she conducts friendships on more of an intimate basis. Otherwise you'll be regulated to cast member on the real housewives and she will treat you like a throw away prop for the show since the superficialness of the show seems to trump all else.  I truly believe she does likes to keep certain aspects of what's required for the show separate from her real life and it was pretty obvious early on. It's like okay we can do what we do for the cameras but when all is said and done I really do treasure my friendships. Don't go through the motions on the show if you don't intend for it to extend beyond the season. I think Yolanda doesn't know how to turn in on and off. I mean look at how "all in" she was with David.

 

I think Yolanda resents the superficial aspect of the show whereas the other women are fine with it. I think Yolanda takes everything personally and doesn't separate what's done on the show "for the show" and what it means in real life to the friendship. There are some cast members throughout all the franchises who perform and bring it with the idea that hey it's all good. That certain real life interpretations should be suspended among the ladies and a different set of rules are in place once the cameras are rolling. The Kenya's, The Tamara's, The Ramona's, The Jill Zarins, The Gorgas. Bring the drama no matter you have to use and I don't think Yolanda has ever been down with that mindset which is why, to me, she seems to want to desperately control the narrative especially when it comes to her stance on friendships. I also have a feeling that she wanted to make sure that she didn't start converting and then her real life friends she her tolerating XYZ for the show but meanwhile off season she's isn't actually a pushover.

 

I think Yolanda has reasons for her disappointments. I don't think they come out of thin air. I believe she reacts situation by situation and if her reactions differ I'm ready to believe it's because different situations produce different reactions.

 

If you get to know people GENUINELY you don't need to be psychic. What it boils down to is Yolanda has basically reacted to them as the surface "friends" they've presented themselves to be. If someone was claiming to be oh so concerned about me but we both damn well know we aren't tight like that I'd be correcting the narrative too.

 

That's what this whole season has been to me. Yolanda correcting the narrative that the others have tried to float which is that they care ENOUGH about her to have her name in their mouths 24/7 and that just isn't the case. Everything else is actually moot.

Edited April 12, 2016 by Yours Truly

[JenFromCincy]

I think where we differ and where it will make it impossible to agree (on Yolanda) is when it comes to her motivation.  You think she's sincere and that these are her requirements and she wants to be real and not let people distort their relationship to her.  I think she's an habitual liar.  I think she uses these circumstances to elevate herself and put others beneath her.  She does it to make people (especially LVP) look bad because she can't stand LVP to the same degree that LVP can't stand her.  She has a double standard for people she likes (or support her unquestioningly) than she does for people she doesn't.  Brandi screws up....it's Brandi.  LVP screws up...rip her to shreds at a picnic, bring documentation, make her look small hoping that by doing so, you look big. 

 

We have different viewpoints on who she is as a person.  To me she has my three biggest pet peeve qualities.  She's a hypocrite, she is dishonest, and she is ungrateful/entitled.  Three strikes and she's out for me.  You don't see those same things or they don't bother you.  It's an agree to disagree moment.

[WireWrap]

Which is exactly what my NY friend would have done to me. Texting isn't always acceptable. It depends on the circumstances. Some things DESERVE phone calls. I think Yolanda's guidelines can be tedious but still in the realm of understandable. Also, what I've always gotten from Yolanda is that she's questioned LVP's sincerity and considering how LVP comes across I'm not entirely inclined to fault Yolanda for that. I think Yolanda's always looked really closely to how people are playing their hand and if they are trying to using surface friendships as a way to paint themselves in a certain light then she doesn't plan on being the recipient of such a ruse. I've always seen Yolanda as someone who isn't going to allow the mechanics of the show distort certain things for the sake of ratings and footage. Oh sure, make no mistake she's willing to play the game but only with certain subjects. Apparently friendships are serious business to her and didn't want to cross too far into frenemies territory for the sake of the show. I think instead of frenemies she would rather keep you at arms length, make it clear that you don't fall into friendship category and if anyone wants that to change then leave the bullshit reality show stuff at the door and join her behind the scenes where she conducts friendships on more of an intimate basis. Otherwise you'll be regulated to cast member on the real housewives and she will treat you like a throw away prop for the show since the superficialness of the show seems to trump all else.  I truly believe she does likes to keep certain aspects of what's required for the show separate from her real life and it was pretty obvious early on. It's like okay we can do what we do for the cameras but when all is said and done I really do treasure my friendships. Don't go through the motions on the show if you don't intend for it to extend beyond the season. I think Yolanda doesn't know how to turn in on and off. I mean look at how "all in" she was with David.

 

I think Yolanda resents the superficial aspect of the show whereas the other women are fine with it. I think Yolanda takes everything personally and doesn't separate what's done on the show "for the show" and what it means in real life to the friendship. There are some cast members throughout all the franchises who perform and bring it with the idea that hey it's all good. That certain real life interpretations should be suspended among the ladies and a different set of rules are in place once the cameras are rolling. The Kenya's, The Tamara's, The Ramona's, The Jill Zarins, The Gorgas. Bring the drama no matter you have to use and I don't think Yolanda has ever been down with that mindset which is why, to me, she seems to want to desperately control the narrative especially when it comes to her stance on friendships. I also have a feeling that she wanted to make sure that she didn't start converting and then her real life friends she her tolerating XYZ for the show but meanwhile off season she's isn't actually a pushover.

 

I think Yolanda has reasons for her disappointments. I don't think they come out of thin air. I believe she reacts situation by situation and if her reactions differ I'm ready to believe it's because different situations produce different reactions.

 

If you get to know people GENUINELY you don't need to be psychic. What it boils down to is Yolanda has basically reacted to them as the surface "friends" they've presented themselves to be. If someone was claiming to be oh so concerned about me but we both damn well know we aren't tight like that I'd be correcting the narrative too.

 

That's what this whole season has been to me. Yolanda correcting the narrative that the others have tried to float which is that they care ENOUGH about her to have her name in their mouths 24/7 and that just isn't the case. Everything else is actually moot.

Yolanda is the prime example of a "Hollywood friend". She isn't there for the others at all, yet expects them to be there for her. She doesn't nurture friendships with these women outside of filming. She didn't visit Kim in rehab, she doesn't visit Brandi at whichever current house she is renting unless there is a camera in tow. She doesn't keep in contact with any of them when the cameras are gone, none of them. Both Lisa and Kyle keep in contact with most of the others even after the cameras are gone, including most of their former cast mates, like Joyce, Carlton (Lisa), Adrienne, Camille, Taylor, the only exception is Brandi and even Yolanda doesn't see/talk to Brandi unless there are cameras present and Yolanda has not been there for Kim outside of filming. Yolanda wants the others to treat her as a friend but doesn't want to treat them as friends herself. Friendship is a 2 way street for most but with Yolanda, it is 1 way and only she is on the receiving end.

 

I think where we differ and where it will make it impossible to agree (on Yolanda) is when it comes to her motivation.  You think she's sincere and that these are her requirements and she wants to be real and not let people distort their relationship to her.  I think she's an habitual liar.  I think she uses these circumstances to elevate herself and put others beneath her.  She does it to make people (especially LVP) look bad because she can't stand LVP to the same degree that LVP can't stand her.  She has a double standard for people she likes (or support her unquestioningly) than she does for people she doesn't.  Brandi screws up....it's Brandi.  LVP screws up...rip her to shreds at a picnic, bring documentation, make her look small hoping that by doing so, you look big. 

 

We have different viewpoints on who she is as a person.  To me she has my three biggest pet peeve qualities.  She's a hypocrite, she is dishonest, and she is ungrateful/entitled.  Three strikes and she's out for me.  You don't see those same things or they don't bother you.  It's an agree to disagree moment.

I think Lisa really did try to "befriend/like" Yolanda when she joined the show but Yolanda wanted no parts of Lisa because of Mohammed. Yolanda only tolerated Lisa to get a toe hold on the show and nothing more. Yolanda got that toe hold with Brandi and Yolanda was off to the races against Lisa, doing all she could to bring her down, including claiming Ken abused/manhandled her. At this point, Lisa doesn't like Yolanda (that is as clear as day) but Yolanda hates Lisa as clear as day.

[Yours Truly]

Yolanda is the prime example of a "Hollywood friend". She isn't there for the others at all, yet expects them to be there for her. She doesn't nurture friendships with these women outside of filming. She didn't visit Kim in rehab, she doesn't visit Brandi at whichever current house she is renting unless there is a camera in tow. She doesn't keep in contact with any of them when the cameras are gone, none of them. Both Lisa and Kyle keep in contact with most of the others even after the cameras are gone, including most of their former cast mates, like Joyce, Carlton (Lisa), Adrienne, Camille, Taylor, the only exception is Brandi and even Yolanda doesn't see/talk to Brandi unless there are cameras present and Yolanda has not been there for Kim outside of filming. Yolanda wants the others to treat her as a friend but doesn't want to treat them as friends herself. Friendship is a 2 way street for most but with Yolanda, it is 1 way and only she is on the receiving end.

 

I think Lisa really did try to "befriend/like" Yolanda when she joined the show but Yolanda wanted no parts of Lisa because of Mohammed. Yolanda only tolerated Lisa to get a toe hold on the show and nothing more. Yolanda got that toe hold with Brandi and Yolanda was off to the races against Lisa, doing all she could to bring her down, including claiming Ken abused/manhandled her. At this point, Lisa doesn't like Yolanda (that is as clear as day) but Yolanda hates Lisa as clear as day.

How do we "know" this about Yolanda?

 

Either keep it surface or don't but don't try to mix the two for the shows sake. I think that's where Yolanda's coming from.

 

Whatever, about her interactions with Brandi, Kim. That's the arrangement they've willingly come to and agreed on. It's mutual between the three of them. All three of them are in agreement on how their "friendship" is represented so even if it is for the show it seems pretty clear that all three of them have a say in how their interactions are presented for the camera and delivered to the public.

 

Say what you want but they aren't being underhanded with one another. I like that better than the Kyle, LVP, Eileen, LisaR bus throwing fest over on the other side, at the "nice guy" camp.

Edited April 12, 2016 by Yours Truly

[WireWrap]

How do we "know" this about Yolanda?

Which part? Yolanda, herself has said that she doesn't see/talk to Brandi when they aren't filming and she is closest to Brandi so I don't see her reaching out to Kim if she isn't reaching out to Brandi....logic and all. As for Yolanda "hating" Lisa, she has gone from 1 HW to the next slamming her and she even tried to turn Mohammed against her a couple of seasons ago but he shut her down. We also know that Yolanda and Erika were not friends before Erika joined the show, good grief, she didn't even know what type/style of music Erika sang or anything about her "performances" . LOL 

[kokapetl]

Yolanda being pissed off with Lisa's Münchausen conspiracy, it's justified. Lisa is sneaky and duplicitous, and Yolanda is hardly the first to accuse her. Yolanda is often insufferable but she's pretty straight up.

[Yours Truly]

Which part? Yolanda, herself has said that she doesn't see/talk to Brandi when they aren't filming and she is closest to Brandi so I don't see her reaching out to Kim if she isn't reaching out to Brandi....logic and all. As for Yolanda "hating" Lisa, she has gone from 1 HW to the next slamming her and she even tried to turn Mohammed against her a couple of seasons ago but he shut her down. We also know that Yolanda and Erika were not friends before Erika joined the show, good grief, she didn't even know what type/style of music Erika sang or anything about her "performances" . LOL 

Lisa and Yo have whatever issues between them and it just looks like Yolanda doesn't really try to  hide it. I don't see anything wrong with that. Actually Yolanda is pretty much showing us that she's not interested in "pretending" for the show and knows that the "concerned" chatter probably comes more from a place of gossip BECAUSE of the discord than from a place of "concern". I actually enjoy the fact that Yolanda has tackled this season from the position of someone who pretty much has their number. It is for the show and Yolanda is obviously expressing her disdain over the charade and that it's her story being used to draw a crowd for the show. Hey, Yolanda's been plenty public about her "journey" but here's the thing. She's the one that's sick so have at it. That's HER prerogative. The other ladies piggybacking on it throughout the season so that it's their bread and butter this season as well is rather tacky and worthy of Yolanda's criticism. I think it's more about the dynamics surrounding the show. How things are exploited instead of being a collaboration. Yolanda, Kim and Brandi filming. THAT'S a collaboration that benefits the three of them. LVP, Kyle, LisaR, Eileen butchering the subject into the very negative and toxic mess that we have now about something not truly affecting THEM is where I feel Yolanda comes out on top. I'm sorry it's just painfully obvious. Yolanda isn't happy that the others went along with exploiting her struggles for the show. Yolanda may be a player in the nasty game of reality tv but I have yet to see her grab another housewives very personal storyline and manipulated it throughout the season so that the powers that be are satisfied with the footage. I think she's offended at the lack of respect as a whole. I mean it is reality TV but it really isn't something to be so reckless about and to treat so childishly just because Bravo is pointing a damn camera at them. I felt the same way about the way the show and it's participants handled/handles the subject of Kim's addiction.

[thewhiteowl]

I think the idea that others should allow their lives to be controlled by Yo's or anyone else's illness, real or imaginary, is the height of self-indulgent arrogance. People should and mostly do IMO what in in their heart to do for an ill person. Anything else is just a form of control by the sick one and resented by the others. JMO.

[Satchels of gold]

Yo left her last TV show ( the Dutch in Hollywood) not speaking to any of her co stars so Occum's razor tells me Yo is just an ass. I have no idea how Yo treats her friends/family but I do know that she donated a paultry 1000 dollars to her long time Bff's medical care and the leaked email to Bella was full of " what have I done to deserve this? " statements. So yes I think Yolander is very self centered and not all that concerned for others.

[Yours Truly]

I think the idea that others should allow their lives to be controlled by Yo's or anyone else's illness, real or imaginary, is the height of self-indulgent arrogance. People should and mostly do IMO what in in their heart to do for an ill person. Anything else is just a form of control by the sick one and resented by the others. JMO.

There's always this leap that showing need is the same as trying to control other people's lives with their illness. People who claim to care need to show it genuinely. People who can't due to whatever understandable reasons should still do what they can if they are on a certain level in said persons life, still be present in smaller consistent ways. It's just the right thing to do. And people who can't be bothered to go beyond the surface should just exit stage left, leave it at that and not expect to be able to falsely wear this "I'm there for her" merit badge to third parties. It's actually quite simple really.

Edited April 12, 2016 by Yours Truly

[JenFromCincy]

I think the idea that others should allow their lives to be controlled by Yo's or anyone else's illness, real or imaginary, is the height of self-indulgent arrogance. People should and mostly do IMO what in in their heart to do for an ill person. Anything else is just a form of control by the sick one and resented by the others. JMO.

I hope you don't mind, but you just became my spirit animal.  ;) 

 

 

 

There's always this leap that showing need is the same as trying to control other people's lives with their illness. People who claim to care need to show it genuinely.

What need?  Desires or wants, perhaps, but not need.  And because it's a want or desire, expecting it from someone else is controlling.  Who gets to say what is genuine? I'm sure LVP thought her texts and flowers and follow up phone call after Yo's surgery were genuine.

[WireWrap]

Yolanda being pissed off with Lisa's Münchausen conspiracy, it's justified. Lisa is sneaky and duplicitous, and Yolanda is hardly the first to accuse her. Yolanda is often insufferable but she's pretty straight up.

Which Lisa? Because LisaV didn't start that, that is all Rinna.

[jaync]

With the exception of Brandi, I had never before seen her show any interest in anyone else or their lives.

Well, Mauricio was there, so...

(Remember the "sandwich"? And the time in Hawaii when Yolanda literally swam into his crotch?)

 

If you get to know people GENUINELY you don't need to be psychic.

Since she claimed to be psychic, then evidently Yolanda doesn't GENUINELY get to know people, either.

[kokapetl]

Which Lisa? Because LisaV didn't start that, that is all Rinna.

Lisa Vanderpump. Kyle was begging her to admit the off camera stuff.

[WireWrap]

There's always this leap that showing need is the same as trying to control other people's lives with their illness. People who claim to care need to show it genuinely. People who can't due to whatever understandable reasons should still do what they can if they are on a certain level in said persons life, still be present in smaller consistent ways. It's just the right thing to do. And people who can't be bothered to go beyond the surface should just exit stage left, leave it at that and not expect to be able to falsely wear this "I'm there for her" merit badge to third parties. It's actually quite simple really.

 

Yolanda isn't just saying that she misses seeing/talking to the others. She is constantly reminding them they are not her friends because they aren't able to meet her needs/demands that she keeps shifting. As soon as she says, "no one calls" the others say, we have called but you didn't want to talk and then she says she prefers visits but wouldn't let anyone just come and visit her. She moves the goal post on what she want them to do every single time and she does so so that she can complain about them not being there for her. Yolanda is very calculating and does this to make the others look bad.

Lisa Vanderpump. Kyle was begging her to admit the off camera stuff.

 

Rinna has admitted to being the one to bring Munchausen into the discussion all on her own. LisaV didn't introduce the word to Rinna, Rinna brought it to LisaV and Kyle.

[jinjer]

If they aren't there for her, then why are they all so concerned about her illness, her munchausen, whether her kids have it? Why is Rinna enraged that she missed a dinner. Why do they care if she wears makeup to Rinna's bday dinner.  Why at the taco-fest with Rinna not even there does it matter if Yo and Rinna made up at the carnival and moved on? Yo isn't controlling these women's lives. They are - She wasn't even in Dubai and her name was mentioned a ton. I can see why she thinks they are shitty friends.  All this talk about her and they don't even bring a casserole. Either they are friends and they come to visit, or they aren't and they should keep her name out of their mouths

.

Edited April 12, 2016 by jinjer

[Yours Truly]

 

 

 

What need?  Desires or wants, perhaps, but not need.  And because it's a want or desire, expecting it from someone else is controlling.  Who gets to say what is genuine? I'm sure LVP thought her texts and flowers and follow up phone call after Yo's surgery were genuine.

Everybody gets to received and determine actions towards them the way they receive them. No one can tell Yolanda that she HAS to feel a specific way about it. I get to decide how I FEEL about someone's behavior towards me. We all do this. We determine how we FEEL about a person's tone, body language, intent. We don't just go by one specific thing. Why is it so hard to believe that maybe just maybe Yolanda was reacting to other factors besides the "technical" display? I mean, I'm not saying that it isn't possible Yolanda could have been unfair or biased in her assessments but to act as if Yolanda is just supposed to accept less than sincere overtures without feeling a certain kind of way about it just seems so very one sided. But hey. All I know is I'll be damned if someone tells me I have no right to feel a certain way if I get the impression that well wishes aren't exactly pure. That's more hurtful than no support at all. At least in my opinion. I for one would let it be known and no one could tell me I'm not allowed to feel how I feel. That's for damn sure.

If they aren't there for her, then why are they all so concerned about her illness, her munchausen, whether her kids have it? Why is Rinna enraged that she missed a dinner. Why do they care if she wears makeup to Rinna's bday dinner.  Why at the taco-fest with Rinna not even there does it matter if Yo and Rinna made up at the carnival and moved on? Yo isn't controlling these women's lives. They are - She wasn't even in Dubai and her name was mentioned a ton. I can see why she thinks they are shitty friends.  All this talk about her and they don't even bring a casserole. Either they are friends and they come to visit, or they aren't and they should keep her name out of their mouths

.

OMG! It's so simple isn't it??? I have no idea why this seems to be such a complicated concept to understand.

 

"All this talk about her and they don't even bring a casserole"- OMG, I love this. And what's funny it really does just boil down to that. Bring a damn casserole at least if ya gonna be taking shots and gossiping about me and my makeup less face. Damn!

Edited April 12, 2016 by Yours Truly

[Yours Truly]

Yolanda isn't just saying that she misses seeing/talking to the others. She is constantly reminding them they are not her friends because they aren't able to meet her needs/demands that she keeps shifting. As soon as she says, "no one calls" the others say, we have called but you didn't want to talk and then she says she prefers visits but wouldn't let anyone just come and visit her. She moves the goal post on what she want them to do every single time and she does so so that she can complain about them not being there for her. Yolanda is very calculating and does this to make the others look bad.

 

 

But she brings those details up in connection with the fact that she is being spoken about by them but they aren't actually participating in supporting her. Well they are... for show that is.

 

What fails to be brought into the forefront when listing Yolanda's "offenses" is that it's not happening in some sort of vacuum. She's reacting to the shitty behavior of the other women and how they choose to react to her Instagram and how she displays her illness. Yolanda is reacting to things directed at her or about her whereas the start of all this mess was because the women were reacting to things that Yolanda wasn't deliberately doing to them specifically. They were just reacting to her in general, how she behaves in general, how she posts pics on instagram, how she's handling her illness. They weren't going on about how, let say, Yolanda posted some catty comment on someone's picture. Or maybe reacted nasty to a person's tweet. It all started because the women were being meanspirited when discussing Yolanda and her illness. Not every conversation was meanspirited by some of them were or at the very least inappropriate and in bad taste. That's crux of this storyline. Not nice things were lobbied around unnecessarily and Yolanda understandably reacted with an attitude for pretty much the whole season. I really don't see how that's Yolanda's fault. They set up the tone with their inappropriate jesting. Lisa Rinna took it a bit further for paycheck sake turned it up a couple of notches with even more inappropriate declarations and the rest is about them getting attitudes with Yolanda because she was confronting them with a justified attitude and all of a sudden it turns into who does Yolanda think she is trying to dictate whether or not we get to joke about her illness.. oh excuse me.. get to discuss with an "abundence of concern" (sure yeah right) her illness. My eyes can't roll enough at this complete distortion of what the season actually entailed. It's mind boggling. 

Edited April 12, 2016 by Yours Truly

[kokapetl]

If they aren't there for her, then why are they all so concerned about her illness, her munchausen, whether her kids have it? Why is Rinna enraged that she missed a dinner. Why do they care if she wears makeup to Rinna's bday dinner. Why at the taco-fest with Rinna not even there does it matter if Yo and Rinna made up at the carnival and moved on? Yo isn't controlling these women's lives. They are - She wasn't even in Dubai and her name was mentioned a ton. I can see why she thinks they are shitty friends. All this talk about her and they don't even bring a casserole. Either they are friends and they come to visit, or they aren't and they should keep her name out of their mouths

.

It's so easy to slag off a woman who isn't present! Plus, Hell will freeze over before Lisa willingly drags up her own shit. She'd sooner feign Alzheimer's.

[homeperm]

But why does a person that's battling an illness have to try so hard? Word it correctly? Get it just right? Like most people have pointed out. Most people are accustomed to actually not saying anything at all for fear of putting too much of their problems out there and on others. Most people want who are ill want to be spared the task of actually BEGGING oh, excuse me "reaching out" for love, support, caring and attention. The true etiquette lies, not with the person who is ill but with those around them. It's because of this whole "people have lives" mantra, which sweeps the nation, that we've become accustomed to "taking what we get" for fear of coming across in the way Yolanda is being painted. Someone who is ill is supposed to just be at the mercy of whatever others can scrape together in terms of what they can give and never based on what the afflicted person would love to receive. Ever notice how sad that is? And when we do come across someone willing to be honest about that imbalance she's the one criticized because she's not expressing it in the humble, tentative way that is expected or to put it simply "she hasn't asked nicely". I think the reason she's isn't is because it's a bit corny to have to ask at all.  I just think that society as a whole handle illness in very callous ways and God help anyone who asserts themselves and vocalizes how offensive it feels to be guilted for wanting people to genuinely care and make an effort WITHOUT prompting. Most people would LOVE shows of support. Some say they are the opposite but even people respecting your need for minimal attention would again BE signs of support because they care enough to deliver the support YOU in particular are needing. I know that Yolanda has unlikable traits but I don't think that should mean that she abandon her views on friendships and support. I don't think her views are all that outrageous to be honest and I don't think that she should feel bad about feeling how she feels. If the other women didn't constantly bring her up or talk about her then I doubt Yolanda would be constantly babbling about what she thinks of them and their hollywood friendships as often as she's been commenting on it. They just gave her new ammo to keep blathering on about them because well they keep blathering on about her. Lol.

Being ill does not entitle a person to anything. An ill person may be excused from some things, but they are not automatically afforded anything more than anyone else.

[homeperm]

People having lives isn't a mantra, it's reality.  Unless it's your family, what is the expectation here?  We all go through things.  Maybe it's not illness, but it's stuff.  Everyone has to deal and balance what life throws at you.  If you're alone and no one is coming, then there's a chance that you didn't do enough nurturing of friendships or building relationships prior to the current circumstance.  Family should step up first and be there, friends and church communities should be next, and then charities for those with none of the above.  Since when does being sick get you a free pass on being a decent human being? You should take what you can get in life, because no one owes you squat.  If you are fortunate enough to have people that make time for you, be grateful for it.  Nurture it.  Return the favor.  Because no one outside of a reincarnation of Mother Teresa is going to let you take their kindness and sincere goodwill, beat them over the head with it, and then stick around for more.  That's asinine.

 

As for Yolanda, she did complain about LVP being a Hollywood friend and not staying in touch.  Then when Lisa texted Yo to have a good time at the painting party, she called her and scolded her for not calling.  Then she scolded her for not coming to see her and only sending texts and flowers.  That's a change in expectations.  LVP is literal.  You tell her to do something, that's what she does.  She doesn't read subtext and shouldn't have to. 

 

Expecting people around you to be psychic and not only knowing your needs but fulfilling them is delusional.  No one who is dealing with career, family, and all life puts in your path has the time to hone in that kind of vaguery. That doesn't mean they lack compassion.  It's that your expectations exceed normal human ability.

Yes times a billion trajillion.

[homeperm]

I think where we differ and where it will make it impossible to agree (on Yolanda) is when it comes to her motivation.  You think she's sincere and that these are her requirements and she wants to be real and not let people distort their relationship to her.  I think she's an habitual liar.  I think she uses these circumstances to elevate herself and put others beneath her.  She does it to make people (especially LVP) look bad because she can't stand LVP to the same degree that LVP can't stand her.  She has a double standard for people she likes (or support her unquestioningly) than she does for people she doesn't.  Brandi screws up....it's Brandi.  LVP screws up...rip her to shreds at a picnic, bring documentation, make her look small hoping that by doing so, you look big. 

 

We have different viewpoints on who she is as a person.  To me she has my three biggest pet peeve qualities.  She's a hypocrite, she is dishonest, and she is ungrateful/entitled.  Three strikes and she's out for me.  You don't see those same things or they don't bother you.  It's an agree to disagree moment.

I am currently stitching this on to a pillow. I have never agreed with a post more than I do this one.

[Yours Truly]

Being ill does not entitle a person to anything. An ill person may be excused from some things, but they are not automatically afforded anything more than anyone else.

Well I find that stance to be quite sad.

 

Everyone handles life's curveballs differently which is everyone's right. I choose to be flexible, open minded and non judgemental especially to those in the process of battling not matter where they fall on the likability meter. Some possibly at arms length, some even farther than that but always with some semblence of compassion no matter how  slight. Doesn't hurt.

[kokapetl]

I don't think Yolanda really thinks that much about Lisa. I think she went into the show with 2 goals: launch herself as an expert on romance, and launch her daughter's careers. She failed badly at the first objective, she unintentionally killed her marriage. I don't see where she'd get the time or energy to instigate something with Lisa.

Well I find that stance to be quite sad.

Everyone handles life's curveballs differently which is everyone's right. I choose to be flexible, open minded and non judgemental especially to those in the process of battling not matter where they fall on the likability meter. Some possibly at arms length, some even farther than that but always with some semblence of compassion no matter how slight. Doesn't hurt.

I agree.

[homeperm]

But she brings those details up in connection with the fact that she is being spoken about by them but they aren't actually participating in supporting her. Well they are... for show that is.

 

What fails to be brought into the forefront when listing Yolanda's "offenses" is that it's not happening in some sort of vacuum. She's reacting to the shitty behavior of the other women and how they choose to react to her Instagram and how she displays her illness. Yolanda is reacting to things directed at her or about her whereas the start of all this mess was because the women were reacting to things that Yolanda wasn't deliberately doing to them specifically. They were just reacting to her in general, how she behaves in general, how she posts pics on instagram, how she's handling her illness. They weren't going on about how, let say, Yolanda posted some catty comment on someone's picture. Or maybe reacted nasty to a person's tweet. It all started because the women were being meanspirited when discussing Yolanda and her illness. Not every conversation was meanspirited by some of them were or at the very least inappropriate and in bad taste. That's crux of this storyline. Not nice things were lobbied around unnecessarily and Yolanda understandably reacted with an attitude for pretty much the whole season. I really don't see how that's Yolanda's fault. They set up the tone with their inappropriate jesting. Lisa Rinna took it a bit further for paycheck sake turned it up a couple of notches with even more inappropriate declarations and the rest is about them getting attitudes with Yolanda because she was confronting them with a justified attitude and all of a sudden it turns into who does Yolanda think she is trying to dictate whether or not we get to joke about her illness.. oh excuse me.. get to discuss with an "abundence of concern" (sure yeah right) her illness. My eyes can't roll enough at this complete distortion of what the season actually entailed. It's mind boggling. 

This is a reality show. They all talk about one another. That's how it works

 

In light of the way Yolanda presents herself and her illness, Munchhausen is hardly a crazy topic to raise. It makes much more sense than her story does.  

[Giselle]

While I'm not the most overtly compassionate person in the world (or in this forum for that matter), I just can't muster any for Yolanda.  She's haughty and lives in a world of absolutes and extremes.  Nothing ever seems to be good enough for her.  If she complains that people don't text her and keep in contact and they modify their behavior and text her, then texting is meaningless and they don't call.  If they start calling, that isn't enough and they're not coming over.  She moves the bar constantly on friendship requirements.  That would be exhausting.  I get that everyone has different needs and different views on what constitutes friendship, but you can't keep changing the goal posts and say the other person isn't holding up their end.  She's a joy sucker pretending to be a zen master and should spend less time analyzing her friends and do a little introspection.

 

So basically Yoyo is Lucy holding the football of expectations and everybody else is Charlie Brown trying to kick it and never succeeding.

 

Edited April 13, 2016 by Giselle