S20.E09: Week 9

[Swedish Chef]

So Ben said "I love you" to two different women. Big deal. The real offense was when Ben said "for Lauren and I" to those defenseless baby turtles. Run, little turtles, away from the terrible pincers of Ben's atrocious use of English! I can see he is about to tell you how he "should have came" to help you earlier!

[Mabinogia]

The real offense was when Ben said "for Lauren and I"

 

I do not have the greatest grasp on grammar but that particular phrasing drives me INSANE!!!!! And it's so freaking simple, would you say I's date? no, you would say my date. DUH!

 

It drives me insane because they pretty much all do it, and not just on the show. I think almost everyone under the age of 30 says it these days, at least on social media. Maybe it's a social media thing rather than an age thing, IDK but it pisses me off to an unhealthy level.

 

That said, I loved those baby turtles. Best part of the episode for me. They were adorable! And clearly smarter than any contestant on this show ever because they had the sense to run as fast as they could from the lights, cameras and production.

[saber5055]

This reminds me of a guy I dated. I've changed between blonde and brunette over the years and asked him what he liked. His answer was that he likes hair. After that I assumed more men felt that way than I thought :)

 

Yes, men like hair. LONG hair. From my experience anyway. And heaven forbid you should wear your hair up when it can be hanging down around your shoulders. Which, incidentally, I HATE.

 

On a dating site I frequent, one of the qualities I am looking for in a man is he be able to use pronouns properly. I just imagine all the guys who have 'liked' my profile thinking, "What are pronouns? Her and me would be great together. She has long hair."

[StatisticalOutlier]

The real offense was when Ben said "for Lauren and I" to those defenseless baby turtles. Run, little turtles, away from the terrible pincers of Ben's atrocious use of English! I can see he is about to tell you how he "should have came" to help you earlier!

 

I would expect him to say "should of came."  Although that would be three words in a row without a "like" interjected, so maybe not.

[ByTor]

"should of like came to help on like Lauren and I's like date"

[MakeMeLaugh]

Last weekend I had to correct my well-educated and well-employed son, who is a few years older than Ben and who never once heard bad grammar from me (another editor) or Mr MML, when he said "Him and me are meeting...." I don't know if anyone in the real world even notices this anymore. And I am sure he wouldn't write this expression.

 

My unpopular opinion from this episode is that I thought the baby turtles were creepy when they were writhing and crawling all over each other in the nest just after birth--and I love turtles, really I do. I wonder if Show made the rescue guy rinse them off so they would be cuter. 

[MsPH]

Um, turtles aren't born, they hatch.

[MakeMeLaugh]

Um, turtles aren't born, they hatch.

Oh yeah, s(macking)mh. Baby turtles, eggs, d'oh!

[kingshearte]

OK, so I've been busy and only just actually watched the last two episodes. But I read the recaps and the forum, so all I could think pretty much every time Caila opened her mouth was "Oh, hun."

 

A few other thoughts:

- Wow, y'all were not kidding about Lauren's rose ceremony dress. It really was awful.

- Also not kidding about how weird she walks. I'm almost certain she hasn't always walked that way, though, because surely I would have noticed before now? It almost seemed like she had a really serious wedgie.

- I really didn't understand the purpose of rinsing off the turtles, given that they immediately got all sandy again when they started making their way across the beach, and would end up rinsing themselves off as soon as they got into the water anyway. But they were really cute.

 

Regarding did they or didn't they in the fantasy suite, my take is:

Caila: Yes. The way she reacted did not seem like someone who'd just had a nice long talk in there.

JoJo: Probably. Given how excited Little Ben obviously was, it's difficult to imagine that he wouldn't go for it, given the option.

Lauren: Not sure. Certainly they want us to think yes, what with those shots of their clothes on the ground (which I did find a touch distasteful). But it still seems pretty likely that she's the one, and I actually could see them staying up all night talking and snuggling and stuff, and not necessarily getting physical.

[nlkm9]

not for nothing, but I had to stop listening to that podcast--the vocal fry is sooooo annoying.....cant imagine having to listen to that for more than a few seconds....not sure why women think this is ok...

[saber5055]

Something is wrong with either my tv or my ears, because I haven't noticed any fried voices this season. Maybe my eardrums were dulled by Chris Soules' Whitney, who could shatter glass with her voice.

 

I'm hoping to stay unaware. There is enough to irritate me on this show without having to add voices to the mix. Still fun to read about though!

[ByTor]

Something is wrong with either my tv or my ears, because I haven't noticed any fried voices this season.

Neither have I.

[Village]

Twenty-six is young but not a child. It's four years away from thirty. That's not a child.

[JudyObscure]

Yes, men like hair. LONG hair. From my experience anyway. And heaven forbid you should wear your hair up when it can be hanging down around your shoulders.

 

I read somewhere that when men leave a woman for another one, the new one usually has longer hair.  The first time I wore my long hair up while dating Mr. Obscure I asked him if he liked it and he said, "N..  It shows too much of your face." ( sigh, so many red flags, all ignored.)  But I understood.  My face like Lauren's has a pretty long stretch from ear to nose tip and hair skinned back only makes it longer.  JoJo, has too short a distance from ear to nose tip so no wonder she looked great that way.

[StatisticalOutlier]

Last weekend I had to correct my well-educated and well-employed son, who is a few years older than Ben and who never once heard bad grammar from me (another editor) or Mr MML, when he said "Him and me are meeting...." I don't know if anyone in the real world even notices this anymore. And I am sure he wouldn't write this expression.

 

But there's hope because "me" still exists in his lexicon, so maybe, just maybe, he might say, "It was a good thing for John and me" instead of "for John and I."  Which means he's more likely to avoid "John and I's."

 

 

I read somewhere that when men leave a woman for another one, the new one usually has longer hair.  The first time I wore my long hair up while dating Mr. Obscure I asked him if he liked it and he said, "N..  It shows too much of your face." ( sigh, so many red flags, all ignored.) 

 

"Shows too much of your face"????  I know it must have hurt your feelings, but that is hilarious.

 

I wonder if the longer hair thing has to do with the new woman generally being younger.  Except in Real Housewivesland, women usually have shorter hair as they get older.  Or at least they often ditch the long, part-down-the-middle do that is so popular among younger women and generally not all that flattering. 

[Rainsong]

 

Something is wrong with either my tv or my ears, because I haven't noticed any fried voices this season.

 

 

Neither have I.

 

To respectfully disagree...Becca was and is the Queen of Fry.  That and her terminally boring shallowness made multiple-season appearances (and late-stage candidacies) even more torturous.

Edited March 7, 2016 by Rainsong

[leighdear]

I wonder if the longer hair thing has to do with the new woman generally being younger.  Except in Real Housewivesland, women usually have shorter hair as they get older.  Or at least they often ditch the long, part-down-the-middle do that is so popular among younger women and generally not all that flattering.

And often as a women gets older, she realizes that the hours and dollars spent torturing her hair to look exactly like every other woman's hair can be pretty stupid.  There are more worthwhile things to spend that time and that money on.  Catering to female hair vanity is a HUGE money maker. 

 

Especially when it's for a guy who's idea of major grooming is to clip that stray nose hair and wash his hair with actual shampoo instead of just running that bar of deodorant soap over his head.  *LOL* 

[MakeMeLaugh]

Something is wrong with either my tv or my ears, because I haven't noticed any fried voices this season. Maybe my eardrums were dulled by Chris Soules' Whitney, who could shatter glass with her voice.

I'm hoping to stay unaware. There is enough to irritate me on this show without having to add voices to the mix. Still fun to read about though!

It sounded pretty bad to me, Lauren's out-of-nowhere dip into the vocal frying pan on the last episode. Maybe she had a cold or is allergic to baby turtles, but to my ears she sounded really different.

[ByTor]

To respectfully disagree...Becca was and is the Queen of Fry.  That and her terminally boring shallowness made multiple-season appearances (and late-stage candidacies) even more tortuous.

To be honest, I never noticed it was that pronounced on her either. I thought the perfect example of the "fry" was Ashley I and her sister.

[saber5055]

The first time I wore my long hair up while dating Mr. Obscure I asked him if he liked it and he said, "N..  It shows too much of your face."

This totally made me LOL. That's maybe worse than the man saying, "Yes, those pants make your *ss look HUGE!" There is such a thing as a discrete white lie. And he went on to become Mr. Obsure? Oh, my!

To respectfully disagree...Becca was and is the Queen of Fry.

I disliked everything about Becca, from her homely countenance to her Grumpy Cat downturned mouth to her completely boring persona. How her voice sounded was so far at the bottom of dislikable things about her in my book that I never noticed. But if she was Queen of Fry, well, then, okay with me!

Especially when it's for a guy who's idea of major grooming is to clip that stray nose hair and wash his hair with actual shampoo instead of just running that bar of deodorant soap over his head.

If you are lucky!

Edited March 6, 2016 by saber5055

[yorklee2]

I read somewhere that when men leave a woman for another one, the new one usually has longer hair.  The first time I wore my long hair up while dating Mr. Obscure I asked him if he liked it and he said, "N..  It shows too much of your face." ( sigh, so many red flags, all ignored.)  But I understood.  My face like Lauren's has a pretty long stretch from ear to nose tip and hair skinned back only makes it longer.  JoJo, has too short a distance from ear to nose tip so no wonder she looked great that way.

I have never known a man who didn't like long hair and very few who liked short hair. It's like it's in their DNA or something. 

 

Not sure if your trying to say you have a wide face? If your thumbnail pic is you though I think you have a lovely face. What do men know?..lol

[JudyObscure]

Thanks Yorklee, but that's not really me in the picture, I just chose that avatar because it looks a little bit like me and it's kind of obscure. At the time of the famous comment, we were standing in line at the movies and I saw a couple of people trying not to laugh. I angrily told Hubs maybe I should just put a bag over my head. Then I could see some of them turn away with their shoulders shaking. If you're going to have a fight might as well have it in public and provide entertainment.

With Lauren and JoJo (and me) it's the side view I'm talking about, from nose tip to ear. Or to return to the dogs, the difference between a Collie and a Pug. My black Dachshund has a pointed nose and when she lays her ears back I tell her she looks like Audrey Hepburn.

Edited March 7, 2016 by JudyObscure

[hyacinth]

Well, I've got to weigh in with the short hair.  I'm here to tell ya, men do like short hair.   They like it just fine.   :-)    (As every woman with short hair knows!)  

[yorklee2]

Thanks Yorklee, but that's not really me in the picture, I just chose that avatar because it looks a little bit like me and it's kind of obscure. At the time of the famous comment, we were standing in line at the movies and I saw a couple of people trying not to laugh. I angrily told Hubs maybe I should just put a bag over my head. Then I could see some of them turn away with their shoulders shaking. If you're going to have a fight might as well have it in public and provide entertainment.

With Lauren and JoJo (and me) it's the side view I'm talking about, from nose tip to ear. Or to return to the dogs, the difference between a Collie and a Pub. My black Dachshund has a pointed nose and when she lays her ears back I tell her she looks like Audrey Hepburn.

Oh I see. Good analogy with the dogs. And you really have a good comedic flare in your writing which I'm sure translated at the movie line. Hence the shaking shoulders.

 

Speaking of profile views I have a heart shaped face aka round and unfortunate jowls since my 20's although I wasn't overweight. Kind of a hereditary thing. I hate my profile. I would be massacred if I were ever on a show like this, (which I wouldn't be) so I suppose I shouldn't be so hard on the ladies. Then again I'm not putting myself out there either. Sad I know, but when these women sign up for this that's what they're exposing themselves to.

Edited March 7, 2016 by yorklee2

[JudyObscure]

Well Lauren B has a heart shaped face and a jaw line that's not exactly chiseled  and it looks like she just might be Ben's special chosen one!

 

We all just need to look for the guy that sees us through the right rose colored glasses.

[MsPH]

To be honest, I don't think most men are looking for a woman with a chiseled jaw. The modelling industry likes chiseled features on women because they photograph well, but those are actually masculine traits. Men tend to be attracted to feminine looks. Lauren's face is super feminine with the small jaw and full rosy cheeks. JoJo on the other hand has a pretty prominent forward jaw (witch's chin), which is her biggest beauty flaw IMO.

[catrice2]

Can't wait to read the comments from the show tonight. 

[hyacinth]

I found Becca's face to be really masculine.   (We can all have fun drinking wine together in Hell!) 

 

I think what Ben likes is a passive woman. He hates being challenged in any way, shape or form. 

[yorklee2]

To be honest, I don't think most men are looking for a woman with a chiseled jaw. The modelling industry likes chiseled features on women because they photograph well, but those are actually masculine traits. Men tend to be attracted to feminine looks. Lauren's face is super feminine with the small jaw and full rosy cheeks. JoJo on the other hand has a pretty prominent forward jaw (witch's chin), which is her biggest beauty flaw IMO.

Interesting take on that MsPH. I had never thought about it like that. I suppose over all though as the saying goes, "beauty is in the eye of the beholder".

[WhoAmIReally]

To be honest, I don't think most men are looking for a woman with a chiseled jaw. The modelling industry likes chiseled features on women because they photograph well, but those are actually masculine traits. Men tend to be attracted to feminine looks. Lauren's face is super feminine with the small jaw and full rosy cheeks. JoJo on the other hand has a pretty prominent forward jaw (witch's chin), which is her biggest beauty flaw IMO.

 

I think JoJo's problem is that she had her nose downsized so much (compare to sister and mother), that her face is no longer balanced.  Hence the overly prominent-appearing jaw.  Based on her mother, I'm sure she has plenty more surgery coming up! 

[WhoAmIReally]

Well, I've got to weigh in with the short hair.  I'm here to tell ya, men do like short hair.   They like it just fine.   :-)    (As every woman with short hair knows!)  

I think men like to be able to run their hands through a woman's hair, short or long.  In general, they like a woman who can get her hair wet without it being a big ordeal.  So I've been told.  It's probably more true of guys who like to do outdoorsy things and travel.

[lavenderpenguin]

This was a brutal episode. I cannot imagine what was going through Ben's mind that he thought it would be alright to drop the L-bomb to two different women -- one of whom he will have to dump next week! It's so unfair because he's setting up his F2 for a much greater disappointment by giving her confidence in their relationship right before choosing another girl and that's cruel. I hate the Bachelor culture of demanding girls open up, regardless of their own feelings for those girls. What was the purpose of pushing Caila to confess her love, when there is no doubt (despite whatever Ben said to her after she jumped out of that van) that she was going home. It's also super awkward for the last girl standing too, because who wants to see their fiancé say they love another girl right before  proposing to them? Even if Lauren B. (she's obvs F1) *knows* that she was always the frontrunner and JoJo never came close, it's still got to sting having other people question whether your fiancé did actually love the other girl.

 

On an unrelated note, I find it fascinating how Ben seems to have convinced himself that Lauren B. is out of his league. She seems like a lovely girl, and girl-next-door pretty, but I find her quite average and bland in both her appearance and her personality (e.g. when she responded to a question about what she likes with an answer about how much her dad likes lawn work), so I can't quite figure out why, exactly, he's pegged her (out of all the women he had in the house) as out of his league. To be honest, out of his final three, I think Lauren is the only one he'd actually have a chance with in the real world (to me, both Caila and JoJo are prettier, come from affluent backgrounds, and would likely have far better options in the dating world), so it's interesting to me that he doesn't see it that way. I do find Ben pretty bland, though, too, so I do get why he's going to choose Lauren B. (they seem well-matched and have off the charts chemistry).

Edited March 8, 2016 by lavenderpenguin