S04.E06: Gideon's Story

[HalcyonDays]

Episode synopsis: A 650-lb. man is unable to work and must depend on his wife for everything, so he goes to extremes in hopes of bringing his family together again.

 

[HalcyonDays]

Just a reminder to everyone to please keep the discussion considerate and respectful, and to limit the unnecessarily body shaming and general shaming overall. This Mod Note explains in a little more detail. Thank you.

[Spooneroonie]

Wow, Kayleigh came off as a real bitch.

And that's too bad because Gideon seems like a great dude. I hope things continue to go well for him.

[aliya]

Wow, Kayleigh came off as a real bitch.

And that's too bad because Gideon seems like a great dude. I hope things continue to go well for him.

I don't know. This guy is just sitting around while she works, goes to school, keeps house, does the cooking and probably the laundry, and the outdoors chores. At what point is she allowed to say 'enough' without being a bitch? Chuck's wife was just as open with her feelings and I don't recall anyone calling her a bitch.  In fact, folks urged her to get out.  Personally, I don't see where Gideon was such a great guy. Not the worst, but not great, either.

[Pepperminty]

I would feel the same way as the wife. Who needs to feel like a single mom with two kids going to school and working full time?

Glad he managed to pull it together. I hope he's still in therapy.

[fountain]

I thought Gideon came off okay - a great dude is a bit of stretch for me.  I can see he probably was depressed with the low energy stuff but he did wait a while to do anything about that so I can see why his wife was tired of it all already as I am sure she was finally thinking "at last he will lose weight and be able to help out".  She wasn't that thin either and she probably was stressed and run ragged doing everything but I guess at least she didn't have to bath Gideon.  However, unlike many other spouses on this show I did like that Kayleigh didn't want to be a caretaker and she did want Gideon to be a functioning adult, which was pretty refreshing as you do get tired of the spouses that are okay with being a nursemaid or on the flipside a spouse who loves the obesity.  However, I guess there was some food shaming from her when we are so used to seeing enabling.  I did like how Dr. Now criticized Gideon's "small" lunch of multiple burgers. 

[ethalfrida]

I think his wife was a real super chick. She stood by him and eventually was able to understand what was bothering him. This was the first case on this show where the overweight person wasn't a walking whinefest. This man had some real emotional issues to deal with. He kept working at them until he was able to move past and regain his enthusiasm and energy. I think both of them were wonderful. 

[notyrmomma]

I don't know. This guy is just sitting around while she works, goes to school, keeps house, does the cooking and probably the laundry, and the outdoors chores. At what point is she allowed to say 'enough' without being a bitch? Chuck's wife was just as open with her feelings and I don't recall anyone calling her a bitch.  In fact, folks urged her to get out.  Personally, I don't see where Gideon was such a great guy. Not the worst, but not great, either.

Good point about the comparison to Chuck's story - I'm surprised that I didn't think about this before you mentioned it  If you really think about it, there is really no difference between Gideon and Chuck, but for some reason, I thought Gideon's wife came off as more of a bitch than Nissa (who I thought was also quite bitchy).    Maybe it's because they didn't show Gideon as a whiney cry-baby like they did Chuck, I don't know.

 

So (as a bariatric patient), it pissed me off a little that they blaimed his fatigue on his mental issues.  I have to assume that they tested his blood and he wasn't anemic or had other vitamin deficiencies.  They should have said something like that because there's nothing more frustrading than a doctor dismissing a symptom as something wrong in your mind.  The surgery and the ensuing extremely low calorie diet are really rough on your body at first.  I remember being too tired to even fold laundry while sitting in a chair in the first month after surgery.

[Momof2boyz]

I thought he didn't look as fat as some of the other 600 plus pound people.  I mean he was extremely obese but not as grotesque.  Perhaps because of his height versus some of the women in recent shows.  He could shower himself.  He seemed like a great guy.  I had missed the beginning and I was wondering about his son because he obviously didn't look like his biological child and yet he kept referring to him as "my son," so I watched the repeat.  So nice that he accepted his wife's child so completely as his own.  I think the guy from a couple weeks ago (forget his name) was also not the biological father of the two kids but also referred to them as his children.  I wasn't positive about them though because they didn't really go into detail.

[stormy]

I was so relived that things went well for Gideon after moving back to OK.

Getting a job and keeping on weight loss plan was a huge accomplishment for him.

[Arynm]

I hope that Gideon is able to keep working through his issues and keep going to the therapist. His wife was a mixed bag for me. She let him just flop into that chair at the beginning and handed him his huge plate of food instead of him walking 2 feet to get it himself. She also ordered fast food when he was trying to lose the first 50. She is not thin either so she could benefit from his diet as well.

[stillhere1900]

I'm assuming the Obesity clinic/show provides an apt for the surgery patients ? Because I totally call BS on them moving to TX  "we found a great apt" and them moving right back out because the wife was fed up and wanted to go home.

[ethalfrida]

His honesty on why he got up earlier than his family was so different from the other people on this and other weight loss shows. He admitted he did it to avoid criticism about the amount of food he was eating. I have never heard anyone on these shows admit something like that.

[dahling]

I'm assuming the Obesity clinic/show provides an apt for the surgery patients ? Because I totally call BS on them moving to TX  "we found a great apt" and them moving right back out because the wife was fed up and wanted to go home.

 

The house they found was labeled in the screen as being in Copperas Cove, Texas, which is nowhere near Houston. It's at least 2.5 hours away by car.  There was mention of her family helping them move in. I wonder if she had family in CC.  But I was also confused when they picked up and went back so quickly.

 

As Dr. Now said after Gideon failed to lose 50 lbs, Gideon is a great big tall man. He carried that extreme amount of weight very well. The wife did not come off well on the show, but her issues are completely fair. I wonder if Chad's wife was more sympathetic because their adopted baby was still an infant/toddler and the workload was clearly too much for her.  It does "look" easier when the child is older (not saying it is). 

[gardendiva]

I think his guilt over being forced to choose between his parents affected him much more than he was consciously aware, and then when they both died early he never really got to know them as people, just "mom" and "dad". He never got to make peace with the past or discuss his feelings with his parents. I was so happy that he got to go to counseling; it almost seemed more crucial than the surgery to his well-being.

 

It did not surprise me that he had a period of low energy after the surgery. On one hand, there is the very real physiological impact of having that kind of procedure done, but on the other hand I think he was suffering from clinical depression as well, which can also be physically debilitating.

 

I had a lot of sympathy for his wife, but I also understood that Gideon was not going to be able to pull himself out of the hole he was falling into by himself. I wish them both well; maybe they will both be able to go forward happier, now that Gideon is helping much more to share the burden of running a household and family.

[poeticlicensed]

OK, I didn't think Kayleigh was a bitch. I saw woman who was at the end of her rope. Here's what I don't understand:

 

Gideon is obese to the point he cannot work, cannot function normally. So the burden falls on his wife who is working, taking care of the house, family, etc. Now maybe it's just me, but if I was as stressed and angry as Kayleigh, there is NO WAY that I would even come close to participating in my husband's food addiction. I realize that everyone is responsible for themselves and their choices and a marriage should not be a parent child relationship of "I want it, you can't have it", but hell, I would not even be in the damn car of my 650 pound husband pulled into the drive through. Period. Maybe it was for the cameras, IDK. I do know that my husband who is not obese is not supposed to eat certain things and not supposed to smoke. If he decides to smoke, he better do it far away from me, same with eating the foods he isn't supposed to eat. I'm not his mom, so I'm not going to tell him not to eat it, but I refuse to look it him doing it. Not only did she not balk when they went for an entire dozen plus 2 more donuts, but when they were unpacking, she asked for fast food when Gideon asked what she wanted for lunch. 

 

I also do NOT understand why so many of these people think that fast food is the ONLY option for a quick meal or when traveling. That makes no sense to me. 

 

I was glad to see Gideon get a job. Hopefully going back out it the world will help with his cravings, his lethargy, etc. 

Edited February 11, 2016 by poeticlicensed

[Diane M]

I've been marathon watching a lot of these shows in the past couple of weeks, and I've noticed that most of these obese people live somewhere in the south.  Have any of them been up north out out West or East?

 

There's no forum for Skin Tight, which is an interesting show about getting all that saggy skin removed after weight loss.  Just not a good thing to watch when you're eating.  Yesterday there was a pretty Texan girl named Ariel.  Not only was she very obese before losing over 300 lbs., but both of her parents were huge, especially her father, who needed weight loss surgery almost as much as she did.  No wonder the girl grew up obese.

[Spooneroonie]

At what point is she allowed to say 'enough' without being a bitch?   Personally, I don't see where Gideon was such a great guy. Not the worst, but not great, either.

 

Okay, fair point. I think it was more her tone, maybe? Or what seemed as the constant repetition of "Imgivingupeverything" every other sentence? Not sure what it was exactly--but something.

 

As far as Gideon being a great guy--I really wasn't very clear, was I? What I had meant by that was near the end of the show, it really seemed to click that he had to grab control of his life--his eating habits, exercise, getting a job, helping his inlaws, etc. I believe he even said directly that he needed someone to stop" holding his hand" when it comes to that sort of thing.

[stillhere1900]

I personally don't think the wife was a "bitch' at all.

[Noirprncess]

I personally don't think the wife was a "bitch' at all.

Me either. I fully understood her feelings. I mean, she works, goes to school and basically supports a family that includes a grown man that can get around when it was convenient for him?. In the words of the late Whitney Houston, "oh hell to the no." Put your giant undies on and find something for work. I don't do lazy men.

I'm glad that he got it together in the end though. If anyone needed therapy, it was him. Although, he, IMHO, came off as manipulative. He had zero intention of going to therapy until his wife put her foot down. Even his decision to do weight loss seemed to be rooted in getting her to stay. SMH Then, they get to therapy and he unleashes this huge sob story that she's never heard?. Even in part?

I hope he reaches his goal weight.

[Azubah]

I think a lot of Kayleigh's "bitchiness" was in the edit. And he seemed clearly clinically depressed. I guess it would make for bad TV, but I wish they'd do this more like real bariatric surgery, where you have to have a psych eval. The depression might get caught earlier.

[non sequitur]

The edit wasn't good for Kayleigh, especially the lecturing that he has to be more healthy, while handing him huge plates of high fat food.  It seemed like she resented him a lot, which isn't good for the marriage.  I don't blame her though.

[Dianaofthehunt]

Aaaannnd, with Gideon's story, I am officially done with "My 600-Pound Life." Dottie took me to the edge, but Gideon pushed me over it.

These people. I don't know anyone that ignorant in my life, and it's brain cell-destroying to watch them gorge themselves, whine with self-pity, waddle,waddle,waddle, and lie to the doctor. 
Also: contraception seems to be unknown to these people.

Edited April 5, 2016 by HalcyonDays
Fat-shaming in post.

[MrsChappy]

Diana, I told myself the exact same thing. I'm done. This is just painful.

[Peanutbuttercup]

I'm of two minds on Kayleigh. In some ways, her choices and how she treats her family seem completely understandable, and she seems like a good and thoughtful person. On the other hand, I found myself thinking, lady, you're awfully judgy for an obese person who spends a lot of time shoveling fast food in her face.

I'm still here for My 600 LB Life -- I can relate to being a person with fat mounds who could heat New England (though not anymore since my surgery). I did always have pretty decent grammar, I hope my style choices were as good as they could be (given the limited choices available to the morbidly obese), and never needed contraception (side benefit from being super duper gay), so hopefully if my former self ran into Dianaofthehunt or MrsChappy I wouldn't mortally offend them.

I had to cancel my season pass to Skin Tight though. The surgery is just horribly done, those poor people should end up Botched and have a more skilled surgeon correct the horrors that are being done to them. I could definitely use tons of plastic surgery since my weight loss, but can't afford it. If the doctors on Skin Tight were actually skilled surgeons with experience in post-massive weight loss reconstruction, I might even consider applying for that show. But the results the patients on that show get are absolutely not worth the humiliation of being on it, not for me anyway.

[gunderda]

I don't think Kayleigh was a bitch either.  She was obviously frustrated with how her life had become.

 

However... did anyone else notice how her weight completely ballooned by the end of the episode??  She was much larger by the end.

I also found it interesting that we did not see ANY scenes of them preparing meals after his first consultation.  We saw him eat a salad from Mc Donalds because of them moving.  But other than that we didn't see how they adjusted their diets. 

[stillhere1900]

Aaaannnd, with Gideon's story, I am officially done with "My 600-Pound Life." Dottie took me to the edge, but Gideon pushed me over it.

These people. I don't know anyone that ignorant in my life, and it's brain cell-destroying to watch them gorge themselves, whine with self-pity, waddle,waddle,waddle, and lie to the doctor. 

Also: contraception seems to be unknown to these people.

And the shower scenes are completely unnecessary.

[Noirprncess]

I don't think Kayleigh was a bitch either.  She was obviously frustrated with how her life had become.

 

However... did anyone else notice how her weight completely ballooned by the end of the episode??  She was much larger by the end.

I also found it interesting that we did not see ANY scenes of them preparing meals after his first consultation.  We saw him eat a salad from Mc Donalds because of them moving.  But other than that we didn't see how they adjusted their diets.

I think neither of them cooked so the majority of their meals were purchased or processed, heat and go foods.

[gardendiva]

And the shower scenes are completely unnecessary.

So true. I swear they make the people change their shower curtains to clear ones just so we can get a good, lurid gawk in while they are naked. Zooming in on the bodies, and always including film of the person shoveling unhealthy food into their mouths can stop anytime too. They pay lip service to the idea of respectful documentation of these people's "journeys", but they take away their dignity while telling the story.

[poeticlicensed]

^^ And they don't even try to hide the fact that they change the shower curtains. You can still see the fold marks from the packaging

[Mom2twoNonna2-3]

Also: contraception seems to be unknown to these people.

 

I'm not sure what you mean by this and how it applies to this show. Please elaborate.

[dahling]

Aaaannnd, with Gideon's story, I am officially done with "My 600-Pound Life." Dottie took me to the edge, but Gideon pushed me over it.

These people. I don't know anyone that ignorant in my life, and it's brain cell-destroying to watch them gorge themselves, whine with self-pity, waddle,waddle,waddle, and lie to the doctor. 

Also: contraception seems to be unknown to these people.

 

It's always good for me to read posts like this to remember how crappy the world can be. 

[non sequitur]

Aaaannnd, with Gideon's story, I am officially done with "My 600-Pound Life." Dottie took me to the edge, but Gideon pushed me over it.

These people. I don't know anyone that ignorant in my life, and it's brain cell-destroying to watch them gorge themselves, whine with self-pity, waddle,waddle,waddle, and lie to the doctor. 

Also: contraception seems to be unknown to these people.

 

I see it more as people with serious psychological issues who have to change their entire lives. It's incredibly hard to give up lifelong coping mechanisms and daily behaviour.

 

Why don't they also have the right to have children, like everyone else?  For example, seeing how much Chad loved his children were some of the most heartwarming scenes this season. 

[b2H]

I enjoy this show only because the successes are a good thing.

Disclaimer: I watched as a friend of mine who topped out at 305 lbs. decided to drop his excess weight through diet and exercise after breaking his knee in a fall. This was five years ago and he is now 170 and has kept the weight off. He also went through thr excess skin removal process and it was a lot worse, and multiple operations, than Skin Tight shows, so I bailed on that onr.

My son's wife and in laws did lapband surgery more than five years ago. They are all still large people. When we would go out to dinner, they would order a meal and barely eat. I am not sure why their story was not successful.

So I watch these shows just to understand the process.

[jacksgirl]

Never had any kind of addiction, but understand a little about the vicious cycle of obesity. You are a little heavy, can't/don't exercise, feel a little down, eat to feel better and boom the weight goes up. I hate watch this show, but admire those who are finally ready to take charge of their lives and change. On a lighter note, so glad to see someone from my adopted home state not act like an uneducated yokel. They both seem like decent people, I hope the keep finding happiness.

[Noirprncess]

My son's wife and in laws did lapband surgery more than five years ago. They are all still large people. When we would go out to dinner, they would order a meal and barely eat. I am not sure why their story was not successful.

So I watch these shows just to understand the process.

Unfortunately, the ways to defeat the surgery are surprisingly easy. One of the more common ways is to drink your calories. We've seen Dr Now tell patients over and over not to drink soda of any kind. But that's true of any caloric based drink - juice, sweetened coffee or tea, milkshakes, etc. There was an article in Salon about a woman who had the surgery and how she eventually re-stretched out her pouch. Eventually she gained the weight back plus more.

But, we've also seen that the surgery is just a tool. Nothing works if the person misuses the tool. In this case, poor eating habits will always prevail. Surgery might have an effect for a short period of time but poor habits catch up in the end. Every time.

Look at the woman from the group Wilson Phillips. She streamed her surgery online. Years later you can't even tell that she had the surgery.

[JodhaBai]

I just wanted to know where all their dogs were when they moved in with the wife's mother

[Yolo]

On Fri Feb 12 2016 at 9:56 AM, stillhere1900 said:

And the shower scenes are completely unnecessary.

Agreed, that is a private matter!