A Case Of The Mondays: Vent Your Work Spleen Here

[Maharincess]

I heard on the radio once years ago that for what used to be called "Secretary's Day" (*bristles fur, hisses*), the survey sample majority said they'd RATHER EAT DIRT (literal dirt) than be "treated to lunch" with their boss. I think about that EVERY TIME I "get" to go to lunch with my boss. AND ALSO HOW I SPRAINED EVERYTHING IN MY FOOT THAT ONE TIME. And how I'm still wearing a boot on said foot. Yeah, that's been super.

I need to know, why is Secretary's Day a bad thing?

My Aunt Joanne used to love Secretary's Day. She was a secretary for over 40 years and loved having a special day.

[bilgistic]

"Secretary" is a very outdated word and no longer encompasses the job that people in administrative assistant/executive assistant/office manager/etc. positions do. There aren't typing pools anymore with the office "girls" in them, and that's what "secretary" connotes.*

I have had various admin jobs, and not once have I been recognized on Secretary's Day. (That just meant that I didn't have to acknowlege Boss's Day. Ha.) It's now called Administrative Professional's Day or some such, which doesn't exactly roll off the tongue.

(*Unless, of course, it refers to "Secretary of State", etc. That's a different animal altogether.)

[Qoass]

I am pretty convinced that all the people I work with got a memo today saying, "Qoass is having a really busy day and it has put her in a really bad mood.  Please take a moment to poke her with a stick."

 

Grrrrr.

[Maharincess]

"Secretary" is a very outdated word and no longer encompasses the job that people in administrative assistant/executive assistant/office manager/etc. positions do. There aren't typing pools anymore with the office "girls" in them, and that's what "secretary" connotes.*

I have had various admin jobs, and not once have I been recognized on Secretary's Day. (That just meant that I didn't have to acknowlege Boss's Day. Ha.) It's now called Administrative Professional's Day or some such, which doesn't exactly roll off the tongue.

(*Unless, of course, it refers to "Secretary of State", etc. That's a different animal altogether.)

I got you now. I thought you had a problem with the day itself. My aunt was a secretary and proud of it but this was back in the days when there weren't many career options for women. Teacher, nurse and secretary were the only "acceptable " occupations for women.

Edit: Sorry for the repeated use of the word "secretary", I'm using it in relation to my aunt.

Edited September 23, 2015 by Maharincess

[MargeGunderson]

I am pretty convinced that all the people I work with got a memo today saying, "Qoass is having a really busy day and it has put her in a really bad mood.  Please take a moment to poke her with a stick."

 

Grrrrr.

 

I have often contemplated putting up a sign on my desk that says "Don't poke the bear." Not that anyone here would read it, but at least I can say they were warned.

[DeLurker]

I am pretty convinced that all the people I work with got a memo today saying, "Qoass is having a really busy day and it has put her in a really bad mood.  Please take a moment to poke her with a stick."

 

Grrrrr.

I've often suspected there was a sign on my car that said "Drive like a dick in front of me" or "Cut me off".   Since I don't do a lot of freeway driving anymore, maybe these scamps have taken to interoffice memo writing.

[Proclone]

Dear Co-worker who wasn't feeling well (which I know because you mentioned it twenty seven times in the two conversations we had),

 

I'm sorry you have a cold.  I really am, but that doesn't mean you have an excuse to be a total bitch to me, not once but twice, when I call you and ask you for help with equipment it is your job to maintain.  I'm sorry I didn't know what a specific error code meant (and by the way neither did the more experienced nurses on the unit), but there was no real reason to get huffy with me.  Nor is there any reason to tell me, "You know we get busy and we don't always have time to run over here," because I didn't ask you to run over, I asked you what the error code meant and how to fix it.  You decided I was too stupid for you to explain it to and said, "I'll be right there," in a huffy voice.

 

There was also no real reason to argue with me about which exact brand another particular piece of equipment was (though for the record I was reading you the name off the box) because regardless of what it is called, it is a different type then what we usually use and I've never used this particular style before (and once again no else on the unit had either).  And considering I was going to be inserting it into someone's trach, I kind of want to make sure I know how to do it before I begin.  Once again you didn't have to get all huffy and say, "You're not getting what I'm saying.  I'll be right there," and there tell me you've been trying to stay away from people because you don't feel well.  I understood what you were saying (I still just don't care what the brand name really is), and I while I am sorry you don't feel well, I didn't make you come to work and if you are here I expect you to do your job.

[tribeca]

Knd of annoyed with work for a lot of reasons.  Back in March we were all called into the office separately..

the big reveal was

We (full-timers) had to say we had open availability or lose fulltime benefits/hours

the company then said for your loyalty we would then be given 40 hours

well it's now September.  None of us have gotten 40 hours.  Managers have set days off.  Some people who were in school had to give up fulltime and lose their benefits.  Now boss is throwing kinks in our schedules to make sure we are telling the truth about being available 24/7

[Petunia13]

I have a superior who treats people of color differently than white employees. I'm sure she has "reasons" they always do. RME

[hoosier80]

So, before every holiday we have stuff that has to be set on various systems.  I end up being the one having to do all the heavy lifting.  Co-worker was just off a month ago, over a week for minor surgery.  Then, I see takes Friday before holiday off (today).  Fantastic.  Asked me midweek, what is it that I have to do again for holiday?  Uh, nothing as you are out again on Friday.  I set up all the crap, tested it ahead of time, and of course the suckiest system that ever was had errors.  So I'm there trying to work with the asshole vendor, who actually told me to chill because they had lots of client issues today.  Fantastic.  Everyone had rolled on out and I'm still there waiting on asshole vendor to fix whatever the hell was wrong.  Oh will there be someone there to test?  Yes, because it's my sorry ass if it's wrong, so I'm stuck here.  Wait, wait, wait.  Oh and test right now.  Whatever assholes.  And it's fixed.  A good hour and a half after everyone has left.  

 

While I'm waiting I ask someone who put in a request, exactly what do you want or how do you want it?  Answer - I dunno, just get the info.  Except you dumb ass, as you've been told a million times before, data from the beginning of time is not kept forever!!  Well we need it.  I guess I'm supposed to pull that out of my ass.

 

The cherry on my shitty day was sitting in my easy chair and hearing something rustling.  Yep, a mouse in the house.  I am just so thrilled.  I've had them before in garage and entryway, so it's now a minefield of traps in the kitchen, living room, bathroom, dining room.  Little fuckers. Oh and I snapped my finger in a trap, which it's swollen and I think turning color as I am looking at it again. Place is a disaster because I spend too much time at work, so I get a weekend of cleaning and I think I'm just throwing out extra stuff, no matter what it is.  Vacation request is going in on Monday.  I don't care what shit is going on, I have time to use, so deal with it losers.   Thanks for letting me vent.

[bilgistic]

For some reason, I get copied on my boss's quarterly production report (read: how much money he has brought in, and in turn, made). Today I found out that so far this year, he has grossed $1,873,970.16. I make about 1/50th of that. I want to run screaming from the building.

[magicdog]

Today I found out that so far this year, he has grossed $1,873,970.16. I make about 1/50th of that. I want to run screaming from the building.

 

 

You're acting as if it's a crime to be rich.  Obviously he's doing something right to make that kind of coin.  Seething over how much you make verses what others make is unproductive.  It only serves to make you angry and envious.  You need to do something to put yourself in that position (to at least make that kind of money).   You won't get it working 9-5.   I don't know this guy beyond what you've posted here, (and you may be accurate in your descriptions of him being a jerk) but he obviously knows what it takes to make the big bucks.  Is it training?  Skills?  Attitude??    If anything, you should find out how he does it - maybe ask him for advice on how he's done so well for himself (flatter him a little - even if it might turn your stomach a bit).  Maybe you'll get the answers you need.

Edited October 13, 2015 by magicdog

[ABay]

So, sucks to be you, bilgistic. You weren't venting in hopes of some emotional support or anything, right?

[potatoradio]

I don't think Bilgistic meant that being rich is an automatic crime against humanity. I thought she was reacting to the income disparity between a CEO-type of position and other positions, including her own, in the company. Everything I've read indicates that the gap between CEOs and "regular" drones has gotten extreme and become a burden of doing business that forces layoffs, benefit cuts and even greater increases in disparity. 

 

I'm not a business person. At all. I'm the first to admit that I have no clue why in the world a CEO "needs" to make as much as h/she does. What is the value of their work that merits so much pay/benefits? I'm presuming it's because they're valued for their ability to take on a responsibility for the company's overall profitability and to present h/herself as a figurehead. A powerful position, sure, but, if I were a business owner, no way would I invest so much in one position to the point that other areas practically run dry.

 

Which is probably why I'm not an entrepreneur. I want to work because I value the actual work, and if it happens to be work that makes someone else more money than I do, I don't really care, but I do think it's reasonable for companies to invest more evenly in all of their workers. 

 

 

[magicdog]

Everything I've read indicates that the gap between CEOs and "regular" drones has gotten extreme and become a burden of doing business that forces layoffs, benefit cuts and even greater increases in disparity

 

 

 

You'd be correct.  I had read that 50 years ago, a CEO would make about 10 times what the average worker made.  Today it's well over 100 times.  That's not including "golden parachutes".  I'm not saying they're not necessarily worth being paid 7 figure salaries, since CEOs to the best of my knowledge do not lay back in their chairs and smoke cigars all day.  They are responsible to a lot of people to make the money come in and keep the business running and growing. 

 

I do believe Big Business has focused too much on money alone;  essentially, they've become eager to make a profit at all costs.  Kind of like the medical professional lacking in bedside manners.  

Edited October 14, 2015 by magicdog

[hoosier80]

Well, the shitty days keep on coming.  I did schedule vacation time only to find that the person who can't come into the office due to injury, well they're good enough to do a vacation out of town.  Say what?  Yeah and no more than 1 can be on vacation at one time.  

 

Then I came across an error in one system inadvertently.  Same shitty vendor as before.  I'm telling the wounded one that the system is jacked up once again, and got well I have to get on a call.  Yeah, thanks for the help.  Then within 15 minutes, that ever so important call is done and they're asking me (wounded vacationer) if it's all fixed.  Yeah I pulled that magic wand out of my ass and waved it around and a programming issue was fixed.  Mind you, everyone was copied on my email to shitty vendor.  I kept getting stupid questions/issues - some so stupid to the tune of why can't I enter a redemption on this account - (account balance was zero).  

 

Then time for meeting with my manager, who is so hands off, you'd never know he was around.  He has blown off almost every meeting before, but this time HE needed me to pull data for him.     

 

Traffic sucked, I'm getting a cold, and where I stopped to pick up a sandwich, yeah they were closed due to a water pipe bursting.  And the mouse is still MIA (the one I thought I saw last week).  I can only hope he'll bite me and I'll be off on medical leave.

[potatoradio]

 

Yeah I pulled that magic wand out of my ass and waved it around and a programming issue was fixed

 

Well, duh! That's how IT works, isn't it? Just like Penelope Garcia on Criminal Minds - type furiously on a keyboard and mutter and then make one final dramatic key press and...voila! Please stop trying to think. It just complicates things.

 

Dear Fair Weather Client/Customer/Whatever we're calling the people who will be using our stuff:

 

I heard you the first ten times you told me that X was VERY IMPORTANT. I told you ten times that I'd heard you. I did. I believe you, really I do. However, just because something is important doesn't mean that it's easy or fast. I explained, oh, I don't know, every time we discussed X that maybe, just maybe, you might want to think about your approach. Because, see, you're making X extremely complicated and that sure won't make X go fast, even if it is Important. But, whatever, you're convinced X has to be done in the most complicated way possible, so I tell you that we're working on it, but we also have a zillion other Important projects and our yes-man "manager" doesn't know how to prioritize and tell people no, so chances are, X might very well get bumped.

 

Anyway, so, when you approach me a week ago with your input on X, which we need before we can start, you say nothing about a date. Nothing. We start work on X. It is not easy. It is not fast. It sucks, quite honestly. OK, though, we'll keep going. I show you a couple of developments. You like it. You still say NOTHING about a date.

 

So WTF is this BS that developed yesterday when you said, out of nowhere, "you mean, X won't be ready by next week? OMIGOD OMIGOD OMIGOD this CANNOT be!!! The whole PROJECT is for nothing if X isn't done!" I said, no promises, but I will keep you posted. 

 

Today, when I wrote and tried to explain why X will not be ready and supplied you with suggested alternatives and apologized (even though I really don't have anything to apologize for), you responded with a sour message. Fine. I go talk to you, say that, if you insist, we can put X out there, but it won't be tested. Blah blah blah...the world will end without X...blah blah blah...what is the HANGUP...blah blah blah...not one word acknowledging that, hmmmm, maybe dropping a sudden death date was on you?

 

Meanwhile, you've apparently emailed our manager and screamed at her to do something about us lackeys who are blowing her off and clearly spending all day loafing. You don't give me the courtesy of a copy or let me know that you're contacting our manager, but instead, you treat us like naughty five year olds. 

 

I have two words for you: f*ck off. 

 

"A lack of planning on your part..." and all....

 

[ABay]

Dear college student, It is perfectly fine to ask at public service desk if we have office supplies you can have or use like pens, scissors, envelopes, paper, highlighters, etc. When the answer is no, It is NOT fine to then ask in a huff "well does ANYONE have x? Do ANY of the offices have X?" 1. Go ask them; we're not in charge of their inventory or willingness to hand out supplies. 2. You are not entitled to any of these supplies so drop the 'tude and get your ass to the bookstore like everybody else. 3. You're an adult. Think about embracing the concept of personal responsibility.

Edited November 11, 2015 by ABay

[bilgistic]

I had vowed not to post here anymore because of the feedback I was getting, but this just blew me away, and I don't want to hijack other threads.

I work as a marketing assistant for the office (building) sales team for a major commercial real estate company. My team consists of our male broker (age 33), a male financial analyst (age 27, also has a broker's license), and me (female, 41). I am not licensed nor do I need to be nor am required to be. I have been in commercial real estate (support positions, not brokerage) for almost ten years--a year less than our broker and five-ish longer than our analyst.

In our office, there are a handful of people in a position the same as mine on a corporate level. They are in office, industrial and retail leasing, and retail sales. All of them work "regular" hours--about 40, or even less. We "close" at 4pm on Friday and they all leave, while I "have to" stay. I usually work about 45 hours a week, sometimes more. The corporate structure is such that there is a middle manager to whom I supposedly report, but she's afraid to speak up to anyone, even though she's said to me that I should be working the same as the other folks, and getting out when we have early dismissal for holidays, etc.

The broker who heads our team is an ass, as I've mentioned here many times. I said last week that I would have liked to take Wednesday off, as I was driving to my sister's three hours away. Blank stare. I said that I was at least leaving when the office closed at 2 (we always close early the day before a holiday).

The thing here is, I shouldn't have to ask HIM for the time, as he's not my boss, technically, but I do as a courtesy. Anyway... I should mention it's our slow time of year right now.

Yesterday afternoon at 2pm, I got ready to leave. He told me to take my work laptop with me "in case he needed me to work on something". I thought he was joking and said so. He said he wasn't and why would I think that. I said because it's a holiday and the analyst was laughing. Analyst: "I'm laughing that this is an argument."

Broker: "Do you know how much I work??"

Me: "Yeah, and I also know how much you get paid!"

Maybe this is stupid of me, but this is a WORK HOLIDAY (Thursday and Friday), and I guaran-damn-tee you that no one else in my position has to do this. Also, if he didn't set up the expectation with the client that he was always available, he wouldn't have to "work all the time". But that is BULLSHIT, because he went fishing in Fort Lauderdale last Thursday and Friday. We live in NC.

I will gross maybe $50K this year. Him? $2 million is a modest guess. Also, his family is all in town, so he doesn't drive anywhere for the holidays.

I plan to talk to HR Monday. I've really had it. I like what I do, but I can't deal with being expected to make this my life for some arrogant prick. I don't pretend to be a fantastic employee, but I work long and hard, and produce good work that enables the broker to sell buildings and make millions. He treats everyone "beneath" him the same way, and no one else wants to work with him. The problem is, of course, that he's a fratty, rich white boy and so are most building owners, so his schtick goes down easy. No one above him will do anything to him because he brings in money.

I don't want to hear about finding another job, because it's not that easy, nor do I necessarily want to do that. I just wanted to vent and no one in my family will let me talk about it, so I'm just silently seething.

Edited November 27, 2015 by bilgistic

[backformore]

bilgistic- Yeah, that sounds awful.  Being expected to be "available"  when you're not at work sucks, especially on a holiday.  I'm sorry you've been feeling reluctant to post here.  As far as I'm concerned, post away!  if someone doesn't want to read it, they can avoid this topic easily. 

I had a boss who was always asking me as a "favor"  to him, to do something extra - come in on my day off,  make some phone calls for him,  fill in for him at a meeting, etc.   He always thanked me and said "I owe you one,  I will return the favor, I promise."  

Then he left for a better position at another company.  But not until he all but promised me a promotion, and then gave it to someone else. 

Sometimes bosses are assholes.

stay strong.

[ABay]

bilgistic, I feel you. There is this woman at work who has the untenured people in her area thinking she's their boss. The rest of us, who don't have be down in the vipers nest with her, tell them it isn't true. But since she's best buds with the actual supervisor, there's not much they can do to assert themselves until they get tenure. It's frustrating for all of us because there isn't much we can do to help them and they, unlike the pseudo-boss, are nice and hardworking. I hope your HR is competent unlike ours (seriously, they screw up over and over and none of them is ever fired) and they can help you. Fingers crossed for you.

[bilgistic]

After checking my email several times on my not-paid-for-by-my-job personal cell phone over the past couple days, guess who didn't "need" me? So it was just a dick power move, as usual.

[BookWoman56]

In our office, there are a handful of people in a position the same as mine on a corporate level. They are in office, industrial and retail leasing, and retail sales. All of them work "regular" hours--about 40, or even less. We "close" at 4pm on Friday and they all leave, while I "have to" stay. I usually work about 45 hours a week, sometimes more. The corporate structure is such that there is a middle manager to whom I supposedly report, but she's afraid to speak up to anyone, even though she's said to me that I should be working the same as the other folks, and getting out when we have early dismissal for holidays, etc.

...

The thing here is, I shouldn't have to ask HIM for the time, as he's not my boss, technically, but I do as a courtesy. Anyway... I should mention it's our slow time of year right now.

If he's not your actual manager, then you shouldn't be asking him to give you permission to leave early, etc. Every time you do,  you're granting him authority that he doesn't/shouldn't have to fuck you over. Next time, check with the woman who is your manager and tell this guy, not ask, that you are leaving early or whatever. If he says he has problems with it, remind him that your manager approved it and he can discuss it with her. Even though you are asking him as a courtesy, given this guy's personality, all you're doing is enabling him to engage in the power plays. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but I've encountered too many clones of this guy and as long as you or anyone else give him the slightest opportunity to do so, he will run right over you simply because he can and he enjoys it.

In your situation, I would definitely follow up with HR. If you are in the same job level as others but are routinely being asked to put in more hours, etc., then there seems to be a pattern there, whether it is dictated by gender, ethnicity or just the fact that this guy is an asshat. If you are paid hourly, then be sure you are getting paid for those extra hours, including the hours you are being asked to be on standby in case asshat needs you for something. If you are salaried, then again, if you are being asked to put in many more hours per week than the other employees with the same job title, there needs to be an adjustment made in terms of pay level/job level.

 

ETA: On the issue of being told to take your work laptop with you, should this issue arise again, the best solution might be to tell him that it's a moot point, because during your time off, you're going to be somewhere with no internet access. It's none of his damn business what you do/where you go during your time off. Look, I'm not an attorney or any kind of expert on labor law, so I don't know for sure if it is required that they pay you for "standby" time. However, the entire situation sounds ridiculous and HR needs to be aware of it. I have known people in IT who were expected as part of their job to be on call for certain weekends, etc., but that expectation was established when they were hired and either they were paid for those hours or if salaried, they got a higher initial salary than someone who would not be on call. In any case, it's not a reasonable expectation that you should be at this guy's beck and call when you are not supposed to be working and are not getting paid for it.

Edited November 28, 2015 by BookWoman56

[bilgistic]

I hear (read) your very valid points, and will ask HR how I'm supposed to account for the time I was "on call". I am hourly, and put my time on a timesheet on our intranet.

[janestclair]

Can I whine about the cold?  Apparently Monday morning was a surprise to everyone, because someone must've forgotten to turn the heat on after the long weekend. It was freezing.and the temperature inside the building was roughly the same as outside.   I had to wear my coat until afternoon, and even then it was ridiculous.  How can you expect me to function when I can't feel my fingers? 

 

I'm not sure when they will learn that keeping the heat on low is more energy efficient than turning it off and then having to bring an entire (very large) school building up to livable temperatures every morning. 

[BookWoman56]

I have a regular FT job that pays reasonably well, but I do some paid mentoring/tutoring on a very part-time basis (roughly a couple of hours a week) because I like interacting with students. Some of my fellow mentors/tutors, however, put in 3 or 4 times as many hours as I do and use this part-time gig plus a few other similar part-time gigs as their main income. So, per the pay schedule, this past Friday was a payday, but no direct deposit showed up. Initially I thought, oh, maybe there's a 1-day delay because of the holiday. On Saturday, still no direct deposit. At that point, I checked the work emails and discovered the other tutors had not been paid either. So today the official email comes announcing that oops, sorry, because of the holiday we accidentally didn't get the payroll info submitted on time. But not to worry, you'll get your missing pay when the next regular payday occurs in two weeks.

 

One of my colleagues fired right back pointing out that while nobody is getting rich from this work, some of the employees are counting on getting paid on time to meet various financial obligations. Again, this is a fairly small group of employees with an overall fairly small payroll amount (the parent organization, though is quite large with a correspondingly large payroll). But even though the late pay doesn't cause me any financial problems, I am appalled at the assumption by TPTB that  it's okay to just delay the pay for two weeks. My view is that if the company had a payroll glitch, then it's their responsibility to do a special payroll run, even if that means paying extra to do it. From their perspective, it would definitely not be okay if I decided to blow off a scheduled tutoring session and three days later casually informed them that I'd get around to doing that session two weeks later. So why is it okay for them to do this? I might add, with my regular FT job, occasionally someone's time sheet might not get approved on time for the regular pay period, but guess what? There is a process in place to have a one-off paycheck cut for the employee if that happens.

Edited December 1, 2015 by BookWoman56

[auntlada]

If I were one of those employees, I might be checking with the Labor Department to see if that was legal.

 

I had a part-time job once at a laundry, and when I quit, I tried to give two weeks notice. I never saw the owner or any manager (or any other employee except the one who had the shift before me), so the best I could do was leave a letter for her at work. She was out of town and didn't get the letter before making up the next schedule, which was never done until that time period actually started, so she scheduled me to work the day after my last day. I called and left a message that I had handed in my notice and would therefore not be working at that time. Her daughter (and assistant manager or something) left a message for me saying OK, but my paycheck was going to be late. I called the state labor department (no email back then) to see if that was legal and was told it wasn't and they had to send my check on the regular payday. I called back and told them that, and I got my paycheck on the regular day. (I did not tell them that if they gave me any more problems, I would also report them for asking how old I was on the job application, but I would have done it. I think they asked because the laundry at one time sold beer in its snack bar area, but they really only needed to know if you were over 21, not how old you were. And they didn't serve beer any more anyway.)

[bilgistic]

Yeah, I'm also pretty sure that's a labor law violation (the not paying until next pay period) but today is the day for them!

Apparently, I'm supposed to be on call and available whenever the fuck my pseudo-boss wants me to be, and the lame-brained middle manager doesn't know her ass from a labor law that it isn't legal. (I'm hourly, not salaried, and there are laws about "on call".) Basically, suck it up or look for another job. I do great work, but I'm a terrible person for expecting humane practices, and I take too long to make my coffee in the morning. Yes, really.

A FULL HOUR of my being ripped a new asshole because I said, "Um, I don't think you can make me be 'on call' over a holiday."

Why have I felt nothing but beat the hell down in every single job, and is this what I have to look forward to until death? (I'm 41 and will be paying student loans until I'm old...and dead.)

[potatoradio]

 

I had vowed not to post here anymore because of the feedback I was getting, but this just blew me away, and I don't want to hijack other threads.

 

Hey, welcome back (though sorry the workplace is still such a hellhole)!

 

That is some sort of bullshit bullying situation you're in. I knew a coworker who was being bullied - her boss would absolutely torture her. Change up her assignments, give her work to other people, not let her know until the last minute whether she could get time off, tell her she had to clean her office over the weekend without overtime pay...naturally, everything he did never involved direct verbal abuse (he'd yell, but stop short of calling her any names or threatening her) or physical threats, so the only thing she could do was document the hell out of everything (that's fun) and refuse to sign her performance review. Turns out, if she didn't sign the review, boss got no raise, so the next performance review was magically better. And he found another person to pick on, so it's better for her now (sucks to be the next whipping boy), but I will never, ever understand why people decide to bully someone else as a way of "managing." I don't want to understand it, actually, I just want it dealt with. And funny how it never comes up at all of our friggin' "sensitivity" seminars. Why yes, counselor, I've heard many reports of bullying and ageism, actually. How exactly am I supposed to help when the powers that be are completely on board with picking a scapegoat to blame for the business' problems? 

 

My peeve is the gauntlet of small talk I have to endure when I come in early. When I come in later, everyone is busy or in meetings, but on early days, everyone is standing around the water cooler or chit chatting from their offices. Oh, my lord, just let me please, please put my lunch in the fridge, get my water bottle, and sit down and be left alone. Please? No? I have to stand there and talk about what you heard on the radio or the show you watched last night or how much coffee you've had? Oh, thank you, cube gods, for this blessing you have cursed my day with. Good morning, merry everything, and f*ck the h*ll off. Love, the office antisocial introvert who really hates you all...

 

 

 

 

[bilgistic]

I am 100% convinced from years of experience, and no one can tell me otherwise--managers and those who pretend to be them would rather have a cheery, fake-smiley, chatty, socially outgoing warm body as dumb as a box of hammers than someone who is smart, resourceful and capable, but just wants to be left alone. It's really fucking sad that this is what our world is.

[auntlada]

I am 100% convinced from years of experience, and no one can tell me otherwise--managers and those who pretend to be them would rather have a cheery, fake-smiley, chatty, socially outgoing warm body as dumb as a box of hammers than someone who is smart, resourceful and capable, but just wants to be left alone. It's really fucking sad that this is what our world is.

Have you read "Quiet"? http://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/dp/0307352153/ref=redir_mobile_desktop?ie=UTF8&ref_=redir_mdp_mobile

I think you might like it. (You may have read it. I think someone here may have recommended it to me, but I can't remember.)

[bilgistic]

It's been recommended to me before. I added it to my wishlist on Amazon. I should get it and just keep it on my desk.

We have a "follow-up" meeting tomorrow, during which I'm supposed to say I've seen the light, or something. I am at the point where I'm wishing my pseudo-boss has a Dickens's A Christmas Carol scenario happen one night while he sleeps.

[Quof]

I will be spending the afternoon in an annual meeting, refereeing between two colleagues who really don't like each other and avoid each other 364 days of the year. 

Then we will all go out for dinner at the same restaurant we go every year, which everyone loves but I hate.  I dislike most of the things on the menu, and of the remaining ones, most contain ingredients that are prohibited by dietary restrictions that have been medically imposed since the meeting last year. So my choices are go hungry, or eat things I don't like.  Option 3 is to eat foods that will make me horribly ill, but that could be embarassing. 

 

So, in sum, I will be listening to people fight, then eating food I don't like. 

 

It's like going home for the holidays. 

[bilgistic]

Are you me? I "get" to go to lunch with the fake boss and coworker occasionally  and it's always the meat palace, and as a vegetarian, the line I ALWAYS get is, "You can get a salad!" Thanks for thinking of me.

 

I say under my breath to just give me the money that would be spent on my lunch. I'll take a gift card to Amazon, Starbucks, PetSmart, etc.

[hoosier80]

Well my new-ish co-worker (they did another type of job until we were consolidated) continues to annoy me.  Poor pc skills - like cannot find items in folders in directories, when directories are spelled out.  Has to have their questions answered immediately, no matter how busy you are.  For example, we had to log into a new website.  Of course, they had issues - where do I go?  Never mind we got an entire word document outlining everything.  I said I'm trying it later today as I'm busy now.  They asked everyone else - no one bit on helping, so called a former co-worker, who painstakingly walked through, no click on the link, no click here.  I got in later and read the document links, etc.  Where did you find that?  Then another co-worker was out so we had to cover their stuff - excuse me - I had to cover their stuff, because "I don't know how to do x, y, z, .........."  Then this person takes on special tasks on projects, I think to show they are relevant.  Problem is, each time it's been jacked up - not major, but enough where people notice. Some stuff has been noticed by clients, so not really good. Then, it's well I'm new to it.  

 

I have shown this person certain simple tasks again and again, but if it's not done daily, it's all forgotten.  I have even said have you read the procedures.......which of course, they cannot find.  It's in the folder marked 'procedures'.  Then they have to print out everything because ya know can't read it online.  If they don't know what to do, it's just left until I see it.  So tired of hearing, I didn't know..........well do some research on  your own and find out.  I didn't spring out of the womb knowing this stuff, I had to learn it.

 

The latest thing is their bitching about working OT. It's not fair and I'm tired of it.  It's part of the job and everyone is doing it. But no, they're a martyr.   Ok, some stuff had to be done after hours (holiday type stuff), but no way did it take hours like they stated.  I can't help it you're slower than a snail.  I mean typing in ending times - like 17:00 - per line when you have maybe 30 to 40 lines should not take 5 hours like it was stated.  Well in meeting today, boss said due to a lot of system updates/changes, it's expected that we'll ALL have OT.  Of course, more bitching after meeting, to which I was very noncommittal.  I have been tasked with crap that will have me working 12 hour days and things that top mgt will be all over, so I really don't care that they're now having to work OT.  The only reason this person was kept is because supposedly they're knowledgeable about one product (and not really, as I've found out).  They're close to retirement age, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed, or hoping either I move to a different area or they do.  It's like babysitting a 3 year old, and I'm too busy to deal with that crap.

[BookWoman56]

I am 100% convinced from years of experience, and no one can tell me otherwise--managers and those who pretend to be them would rather have a cheery, fake-smiley, chatty, socially outgoing warm body as dumb as a box of hammers than someone who is smart, resourceful and capable, but just wants to be left alone. It's really fucking sad that this is what our world is.

I think there are a couple of factors playing into this. One is that there are people who go to the office because they like to socialize and for reasons I can't entirely comprehend, actually enjoy being the office social butterfly. (I am not one of those people.) However, it seems that many managers are more inclined to social interaction and so they are comfortable around similar personalities. On the issue of being as dumb as a box of rocks, my pet theory is that some managers prefer employees who are not especially skilled/intelligent because those employees won't figure out what an idiot the manager is.

 

That said, I've almost always had managers who understood that I would do much better work if they left me the hell alone and didn't try to micromanage me or drive me nuts with a lot of social chitchat. Part of that may simply be the nature of my work as a tech writer/editor. Once I've explained that I need a good bit of quiet and solitude to write, managers and other workers generally accept that explanation. I'm currently working from home full-time, so I no longer have to deal with the physical presence of other workers, although we stay in touch via IM, email, etc. as needed. I can interact with others with no major problems, but my conversations tend to be very work-focused and so not much social talk is involved. However, I do keep a reminder posted on my calendar to engage in small talk once a week with a few of my colleagues so that I don't come across as too unfriendly. I changed positions in the same company a few months ago and prior to that I had a pseudo-boss who had no business being in the position he was and was clueless about most aspects of tech writing (hell, about writing at all). I pretty much did what I needed to but made a point once every week or two to ask his "professional" advice on something very minor, just to make him feel that I respected his position. When his opinion differed from mine, I just ignored what he said and did what I thought was the correct thing to do based on my own knowledge. He realized that I had done the opposite of what he said a few times, but every time he reconsidered the idea and decided my way was actually the right way after all. Even better were the times he then claimed that it had been his idea originally. No, I don't miss that situation at all, but it did make me understand there are times you need to fake some friendly social interaction until you can find a position that is a better fit or a manager who understands and appreciates introverts.

[bilgistic]

A little schadenfreude landed upon my face like a butterfly yesterday afternoon. It was in the local business journal breaking news email that my pseudo-boss's ex-partner and now-rival brokered the sale of a $110+ million office park, which will probably garner him a commission well over $2M (generally 2-2.5%) and my bossish is making something just over that all year. I left early yesterday to take my cat to the vet, so I wasn't there when the news broke. (I did more work when I got home, trying to get TPTB off my back for a while.) I'm sure it's eating him up, and I just feel like: "HA-HA!" [Nelson Muntz laugh].

[hoosier80]

 

I am 100% convinced from years of experience, and no one can tell me otherwise--managers and those who pretend to be them would rather have a cheery, fake-smiley, chatty, socially outgoing warm body as dumb as a box of hammers than someone who is smart, resourceful and capable, but just wants to be left alone. It's really fucking sad that this is what our world is.

 

I've found that to be the case, too.  In fact, one director (I think that was the title) promoted a little ditzy social butterfly to supervisor, all because he wanted someone with a rah-rah personality (actually heard him say that).  He actually promoted two such people because of their bubbly personalities.  Never mind that for one, it was fake; she's just someone who has no filter - so  you get bubbly and then also nasty, nasty, rude comments.  He lost lots of talented people due to his wanting to have a positive team, wanted no one to point out anything potentially negative.  Yep, that cost him as he was blamed totally for one client failure and shown the door.  No one would dare say, it's not going to work because of a, b, c, d.  

 

I had another boss who always wanted the team to go out together.  No, I don't need another family.  I can be social once in a while, but no, I have other friends, too.  He'd do team building outings - in part just to get out of work early, in part because he has to have everyone like him.  I mean he really, really has to feel he's liked.  I don't feel that need, being civil or cordial is enough.

[NutMeg]

This is not a case of the Monday blues but it relates to work.

 

I'm an irreverent worker. I love my work, have fun doing it and it shows. And sometimes people/mid managers resent me for it, because for them working hard and looking like you're having fun don't fit together. The best boss I ever had was one who had such a long time/childhood friendship with the big boss that he - and he alone - was able to pull out being irreverent to him.

 

So I brought to my boss my theory that all corporations needed a "court jester", someone who was able to tell the king when he had no clothes on, and he loved the idea, and got it when I told him that he was our big boss' "king jester". And somehow that freed me to become his (my boss') jester as well, and what fun that was. It's not often we work with someone who "gets" us and who we get, and at the time I was too green to know how exceptional that was. Then I moved to other (and greener in some respect) pastures and realized what I used to have. Still, I wish that more bosses would embrace having a jester in their court! (only the ones very secure in who they are can...) 

[DeLurker]

My favorite boss was pretty intimidating to most people.  I heard regularly from other people "How can you work for him?  He's awful!". 

 

I honestly never would have picked up on that on my own.  He was extremely direct, but he told you what he wanted very clearly from the start of a project.  He was intense and focused, but he could sit in anyone's chair who worked for him and do their job better than they could.  But he struck terror in those who couldn't do their jobs and were all about the networking and glad handing style of management.

[ABay]

I'd settle for a competent boss at this point.

[JTMacc99]

The number one factor for employee satisfaction is the immediate supervisor.

 

And of all of the HR training and higher education I've done in my life, very little of it has anything to do with making people better leaders.  

 

It's pretty much up to the more experienced people in the company to figure out who should be promoted to supervisor roles, and if they put the wrong people in charge of other people, everybody suffers.  AND when the more experienced people happen to be the wrong people, then it just gets worse from there.

Edited December 7, 2015 by JTMacc99

[DeLurker]

My Dad always said "We all rise to our own level of incompetence".

[JTMacc99]

Heh. That's a solid Monday morning thought. I'll try to put a little extra effort in today, just to beat the trend.

[bilgistic]

That's also known as the Peter Principle (not about penises).

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_principle

[DeLurker]

He must have stolen the concept from my Dad!

[bilgistic]

Ha!

[jenh526]

I am so sick of my workplace and I am just getting more and more angry. I don't know what to do with all my anger and my family and friends are sick of hearing about it. I'm sick of it too. 

 

There is one person there who has been nasty to almost everyone, always trying to find fault with everything everyone else does, badmouthing them, etc. She's told me before that with her it's all about CYA, and I guess that's how she does it. She has learned "kiss up, kick down" to a T. So the managers think she is wonderful, and they recently promoted her to a lead position. Everyone that she's badmouthed of course hates this, and no one wants to have anything to do with her. Today one of the managers said "you don't seem to have enough work to do, why don't you go help out B, she is so stressed". Yes, the person who has kicked me every chance she gets, now makes $10K more than me, can't handle her own workload (but asked for all of it to make herself look OH SO BUSY) then cries to all the managers... I'm supposed to go help her out? Sometimes I think I'm in Opposite World.

[Petunia13]

Ha I have worked with someone like that and do now too.

[hoosier80]

Ah, the martyr.  So busy, but if you ask how can I help you?  Oh, I'll just take care of it. 

 

I worked with one a few years back.  She lived a good distance away, which wasn't an issue when she was hired, but suddenly became an issue when gas prices were higher.  Such a burden on her and her family.  She whined for so long that management said oh ok, you can telecommute 2 days a week.  That grew into 3, then 4, then the entire week.  Rarely in the office, but kept whining about all the hours she had to work.  At the same time, she was going back to school, but her work really didn't seem to be done as well or didn't get completed.  Well the martyr left as she needed more money, completed her degree, got another job.  Her old position was not filled, her duties/work was distributed, a good part to me.  The thing is, there wasn't much that she really did.  Snowed management completely.  What she did was work on her schoolwork , as well as her kids' school stuff and all of their activities. 

 

The only good thing is that the entire team can now telecommute (a few days at least), as to not offer it to everyone would be discrimination. 

Edited December 11, 2015 by hoosier80