S07.E09: Birthday In The Berks

[Celia Rubenstein]

I think the real problem with Bethenny is that she is now so enmeshed in the public persona that she has created (quick witted, snarky, outspoken tough girl) that she honestly doesn't know who the "real" Bethenny is, and she is actually afraid to find that out.  She is afraid to be perceived any way other than the personality she has created for herself, and when someone hits too close to breaking down that wall and trying to reach out to the real person behind it, as Heather tries to do (in a not so great way), Bethenny strikes out like a viper.

 

 

Nailed it!

 

Or she is just sick of someone she doesn't cotton to constantly trying to ingratiate herself, pry into her business, s/mother her, and correct her behavior. 

[njbchlover]

I don't think Bethenny and Heather would have been there - it would have been the caregivers.  And I think choosing not to have one's children play with another person's children just because one doesn't like the other person is drawing children into one's disputes and taking it out on them.  They suffer as well.  I say this as someone who has had nursery school age children and understand the dynamic well. 

 

See...I got the feeling that Bethenny really didn't want to spend anymore time than necessary with Heather, so a playdate where she and Heather may have to spend one on one time together while the kids play was the last thing that Bethenny wants to do.

 

When Heather mentioned this, if I remember it right, Bethenny gave Heather that withering, exasperated look that she gives to people that she just doesn't think she has the time for.

 

I also wonder about how much Bethenny "guards" Brynn from people...we know that Bethenny has issues with meeting new people, allowing them to get close, etc.~~I wonder if she will force those same behaviors on Brynn.  I think there was something similar with very, very, very rich girls back in the day (waaay wealthier than Bethenny will ever be), like Gloria Vanderbilt, Barbara Hutton (Woolworth's heiress) and Doris Duke.  They were not really allowed to have friends or playmates because their parents were fearful of what other people wanted from them. 

[Vicky8675309]

IMO, Heather did that because Ramona's date/friend kept looking at them when they were cackling as he was talking about his business's, he looked like he felt they were laughing at him. JMO

I think it was messed up editing just like the editors giving Heather the bitch face when Bethanny arrived, they edited Heather's comments so she sounded hypocritical (stop having fun with a friend, no, go have fun with a friend). Last week I was going off Heather now I can't tell since the editing is so unreliable. I think both Heather and Bethanny can be selfish/caring and bitchy/supportive. The obvious (in retrospect) editing makes the show itself seem like an unreliable narrator….hard to explain.

I suspect that guy was looking around wondering why Heather was throwing shade on him for that article (I guess he didn't suspect that the producers put her up to throwing him under the bus)

edit: and not the same as "an"

Edited June 3, 2015 by Vicky8675309

[njbchlover]

IMO, Heather did that because Ramona's date/friend kept looking at them when they were cackling as he was talking about his business's, he looked like he felt they were laughing at him. JMO

 

I cannot defend any of Heather's behavior during the dinner, nor can I defend Bethenny's - they were both acting like pissy bitches but I agree with you about this part.  I thought the same thing, and you know what - they probably were!  (Or they were laughing about Heather interrogating him and Heather wanted to let them know she was aware of it.)

[WireWrap]

I think it was messed up editing just like the editors giving Heather the bitch face when Bethanny arrived, they edited Heather's comments so she sounded hypocritical (stop having fun with a friend, no, go have fun with a friend). Last week I was going off Heather now I can't tell since the editing is so unreliable. I think both Heather and Bethanny can be selfish/caring and bitchy/supportive. The obvious (in retrospect) editing makes the show itself seem like an unreliable narrator….hard to explain.

I suspect that guy was looking around wondering why Heather was throwing shade on him for that article (I guess he didn't suspect that the producers put her up to throwing him under the bus)

edit: and not the same as "an"

Heather did bring up that someone, Carole, Googled him but then she asked him all about his restaurants. As he was answering/talking you could clearly hear Bethenny/Sonja laughing loudly at the same time, so I do think he thought they were laughing at him. 

I cannot defend any of Heather's behavior during the dinner, nor can I defend Bethenny's - they were both acting like pissy bitches but I agree with you about this part.  I thought the same thing, and you know what - they probably were!  (Or they were laughing about Heather interrogating him and Heather wanted to let them know she was aware of it.)

I suspect that Sonja was telling Bethenny about the mistress crossover, Carole/LuAnn had already told Heather, Kristen and Sonja about it right before Bethenny got there. JMO though

[AnnA]

Heather is busier than a bedroom in a whorehouse.  It's not just this thing with Bethenny.  She always has to get involved and always has to take charge and always has to put people right and always has to have her girls' backs and always has to find a solution and on and on and on.  It was obvious to me--and apparently a lot of other people--that Bethenny had come to the house to be part of the show and interact with the other women etc.  I wouldn't be at all surprised if she'd been called out on her non-attendance of stuff by the Bravo PTB.  I don't think she turned up looking for a fight and I don't think she wanted to be anyone's special little snowflake especially not Heather's.  I mean seriously!  Bethenny's basically wearing a button that says 'Leave Me The Fuck Alone' and Heather doesn't care.  Well OK then Heather.  I guess you should be prepared for what comes next.  And tearful or not, my money is always on Bethenny in this kind of situation,

 

In addition to the obvious unwelcome probing Heather has mastered, she just had to interrupt Bethenny and Sonja when they were laughing.   It seemed like Heather just didn't want Bethenny to be having a good time.

[Grneyedldy]

I can't fault Kristen for talking about John in Dorinda's house, Ramona started that whole conversation and then let Kristen take the fall for it. I wonder if Dorinda now understands that Ramona is the one that keeps stirring the HW's up about John after seeing how that conversation got started to begin with in her home. JMO

 

I didn't fault Kristen either. If this had been a "real" social event, I would think it was rude as hell, but in this instance she and Ramona were just doing their job.

Ramona, though is a real coward when she's caught with her hand in the cookie jar. Her not coming clean both at Dorinda's and with LuAnn at Petroisians shows her true character.

 

By the way

I really like

the new 

format 

where 

everything is

squished to

the side.

 

I feel like

ee cummings

I gotta tell ya you post some funny shit. I busted a gut on this one. :-D

[pbutler111]

I don't think Heather has acted that different this season from past seasons. She didn't have Beth slapping her down at ever turn in the past, so, there is that.

 

Heather wanted to get along with Beth, I don't see that a flaw.

 

I would not put Beth in charge of who is or is not "Cool".

There is no  one named Beth on this show.  However, Bethenny has not had an issue with Heather trying to befriend her, she's had an issue with Heather's ongoing attempts to try to control her.  Most people would get that someone doesn't want to enter into a discussion with a virtual stranger of the most painful, current problem going on in their life, and they'd respect that and move on. Not Heather.  Heather not only insists on constantly trying to force Bethenny into a conversation about her divorce and child custody, but she gets pissed when Bethenny honestly tells her it's too painful to discuss.  When Bethenny doesn't want attention brought to her at the dinner table, Heather can't stop bringing attention to it until, when Bethenny finally tells her to back the fuck off, Heather actually gets pissed and says, "I can say anything to you I want."  Well, sure, she can say anything to Bethenny she wants, including saying all the things Bethenny has begged her not to bring up.  But, if she's going to do that, she shouldn't whine and complain when she gets an enormously negative response.

[AnnA]

By the way

I really like

the new 

format 

where 

everything is

squished to

the side.

 

I feel like

ee cummings

 

I'm glad that

 

I'm not the

 

only one who

 

feels pushed

 

off to the side.

 

I just posted

 

about it in the

 

OT Thread.

 

I'm on my 

 

desktop now

 

but can't 

 

imagine how

 

awful it must

 

be on my iPad

 

or smart phone.

 

I have to go now

 

I'm off balance

 

and starting to

 

feel a little bit

 

nauseous.

Edited June 3, 2015 by AnnA

[WireWrap]

There is no  one named Beth on this show.  However, Bethenny has not had an issue with Heather trying to befriend her, she's had an issue with Heather's ongoing attempts to try to control her.  Most people would get that someone doesn't want to enter into a discussion with a virtual stranger of the most painful, current problem going on in their life, and they'd respect that and move on. Not Heather.  Heather not only insists on constantly trying to force Bethenny into a conversation about her divorce and child custody, but she gets pissed when Bethenny honestly tells her it's too painful to discuss.  When Bethenny doesn't want attention brought to her at the dinner table, Heather can't stop bringing attention to it until, when Bethenny finally tells her to back the fuck off, Heather actually gets pissed and says, "I can say anything to you I want."  Well, sure, she can say anything to Bethenny she wants, including saying all the things Bethenny has begged her not to bring up.  But, if she's going to do that, she shouldn't whine and complain when she gets an enormously negative response.

When did Bethenny claim that Heather was trying to "control" her? LOL And if Bethenny did not bring up the custody/divorce issue all the time, no one would ask her questions, she has no one to blame but herself for that happening IMO.

[LotusFlower]

There is no  one named Beth on this show.  However, Bethenny has not had an issue with Heather trying to befriend her, she's had an issue with Heather's ongoing attempts to try to control her. 

Heather was not trying to control her. We've seen tons of scenes where Heather was just trying to talk and get to know Bethenny, and even act in a kind and warm manner. At dinner, though, her instincts were wrong, her attempt to be helpful was wrong, and it was a bad match.

And FYI - it's Lotus Flower, not Lotus.

[imjagain]

There is no one named Beth on this show. However, Bethenny has not had an issue with Heather trying to befriend her, she's had an issue with Heather's ongoing attempts to try to control her. Most people would get that someone doesn't want to enter into a discussion with a virtual stranger of the most painful, current problem going on in their life, and they'd respect that and move on. Not Heather. Heather not only insists on constantly trying to force Bethenny into a conversation about her divorce and child custody, but she gets pissed when Bethenny honestly tells her it's too painful to discuss. When Bethenny doesn't want attention brought to her at the dinner table, Heather can't stop bringing attention to it until, when Bethenny finally tells her to back the fuck off, Heather actually gets pissed and says, "I can say anything to you I want." Well, sure, she can say anything to Bethenny she wants, including saying all the things Bethenny has begged her not to bring up. But, if she's going to do that, she shouldn't whine and complain when she gets an enormously negative response.

Please don't be rude to me. I don't get into these board spats over these silly women. I have done nothing to you.

I call her Beth just like I call Luann, Lu, it's not some big crime. I didn't realize I wasn't allowed to shorten names.

Edited June 4, 2015 by imjagain

[AnnA]

And FYI - it's Lotus Flower, not Lotus.

 

[SCS]

There is no  one named Beth on this show.

Ah, but there is and she's enjoying a cuppa with Lu, Radz, Silex, Ramonja, Tamballs, Moose and Wig.

And FYI - it's Lotus Flower, not Lotus.

OK.... That was funny.

[LotusFlower]

Ah, but there is and she's enjoying a cuppa with Lu, Radz, Silex, Ramonja, Tamballs, Moose and Wig.

OK.... That was funny.

Right back at ya, Steel. I mean, Steelcity. I mean, Steelcitysister.

And it's Radzi, not Radz. (Ok, now I'm getting carried away!)

[bosawks]

Damn, now I'm obsessing over whether I'd be Bo or Sawks?

[Mondrianyone]

I'm tempted to start calling her Methenny now.  Just 'cause I can.

[Roxy]

I wish there was no Beth on this show. She's dreadful. I was really enjoying this show till her skinny ass showed up. I am so tired of her rudeness called "snark" and crying. I really wish she'd have her breakdown elsewhere but we're stuck with her for now. I've started FF'd all her scenes but saw her start to cry so I had to watch part of it. 

 

Heather is completely overbearing but it's not that big of a deal. Just be polite and try to move on. If you're on camera, just put up with it and being a nasty bitch isn't good for your "brand". 

 

I seriously think Bethenny's on drugs or having a breakdown. I don't care which, I just want her to move along and hope her scenes are alone from now on. I can then easily edit her out of my version of the show.

 

Loved Carole's line that she has two speeds- tightly wound and crying. LOL. I kind of liked Carole again in this episode. So much potential for that party if the Skinny Girl had just stayed away. I'm sure she could binge and purge in her place at the Hamptons. Dorinda probably wouldn't give her her own bathroom so she needed a hotel.

 

I know, it's mean, but someone has to say it. And I'm not rude. I'm snarky. And Bethenny should know to stay off my show and not keep irritating me or I can just abuse her. I have to go get a tissue as I"m tearing up......

Edited June 4, 2015 by Roxy

[ryebread]

Ah, but there is and she's enjoying a cuppa with Lu, Radz, Silex, Ramonja, Tamballs, Moose and Wig.

 

Don't forget Truffle Hunter. 

[SFoster21]

First Look Friday at 8:24 pm.

[AnnA]

First Look Friday at 8:24 pm.

 

The group gets a makeover complements of Hannah...... 

 

[Rhetorica]

Heather is completely overbearing but it's not that big of a deal. Just be polite and try to move on.

No, just no. One can't be rude and overbearing and act in a way that is totally beyond social expectations and then be repaid with politeness. The response to this doesn't have to be aggressive, but the one acting out surely should be told her actions are unacceptable.

[Rahul]

No, just no. One can't be rude and overbearing and act in a way that is totally beyond social expectations and then be repaid with politeness. The response to this doesn't have to be aggressive, but the one acting out surely should be told her actions are unacceptable.

 

I'm waited with bated breath for Beth* to exclaim, "What's your damage, Heather?!"

 

*I don't usually call her that but after the recent tirade/name police crack down I think I just might start.

[Rhetorica]

The group gets a makeover complements of Hannah......

A young girl working at our Y a few years ago had these eyebrows. The first time she looked at me I actually startled! I had no idea this was a trend.

[hottesthw]

I forgot we saw Lu in glasses, she looked good in them. I did lol at the raven, vulture conversation.

And Kristen telling Ramona she sometimes has crocodile tears

[HumblePi]

I like Dorinda and her Berkshire estate is just beautiful, from the outside. The inside however, looked to me like a combination of Downton Abbey and The Cosmopolitan of Las Vegas. Hated the decor and colors.

[pbutler111]

When did Bethenny claim that Heather was trying to "control" her? LOL And if Bethenny did not bring up the custody/divorce issue all the time, no one would ask her questions, she has no one to blame but herself for that happening IMO.

 

I wasn't quoting Bethenny saying that Heather was trying to control her, I was expressing my opinion of what Heather has been doing.  And I don't recall Bethenny ever -- ever -- introducing the subject of her divorce or her custody situation with Heather.

[hottesthw]

Hmmm ... so then I guess maybe Heather meant the kids could play together at her house. That's an even worse idea than them playing together at the hotel, quite frankly.

Hey, I have an idea. Why not ask Bethenny stay at her house, too, lol! Heather just can't help being helpful. I'm surprised she didn't offer.

If Heather was completely oblivious to the fact that there was an issue between her and Bethenny, then why was she speaking so negatively about Bethenny at the Red Lion dinner? She obviously has a problem with Bethenny, and I think she knows Bethenny has a problem with her. All that stuff at the birthday dinner didn't just come out of nowhere.

Re: kids playing together, maybe when your kids get older and can manage socializing by themselves it would be different, but we are talking about little kids whose socialization necessarily involves their parents. And I am not personally interested in setting up playdates with kids whose parents I don't care for, especially when our kids are total strangers to each other. There is just no reason. And there are plenty of things to keep them busy in the Berkshires, I would guess. It is not likely they were bored senseless and starved for the company of other kids.

And maybe just maybe Heather is thinking of, and treating Bethenny like the coworker she is. Maybe just maybe Heather knew of a park nearby where the kids could play. No matter how much Bethenny wants to pretend she's above all these other women, she's a desperate harpy trying to keep her 15 minute flame burning just like the rest of them. Despite their attempts to be welcoming and friendly to her, Bethenny has treated her coworkers horribly. And yet they stupidly keep trying to include her in things. What they should do now is give her the space she wants. Ignore her. Have fun without her. Follow Jill's advice and just film around her. Eventually hopefully she'll just fade away.

I wasn't quoting Bethenny saying that Heather was trying to control her, I was expressing my opinion of what Heather has been doing. And I don't recall Bethenny ever -- ever -- introducing the subject of her divorce or her custody situation with Heather.

Noone saw the actual start of the "fix it" conversation so noone knows who started it (although didn't another HW say Bethenny was the one who brought it up that night). Since we have seen her bring it up randomly to her real estate broker (followed by yet another bullshit crying session), it's not much of a stretch to believe she brings it up often.

No, just no. One can't be rude and overbearing and act in a way that is totally beyond social expectations and then be repaid with politeness. The response to this doesn't have to be aggressive, but the one acting out surely should be told her actions are unacceptable.

That describes Bethenny's entire existence for S1-3 no?? She was an asshole and snarked on everyone from day 1.

Karma is a bitch Beth...surely you've heard that one before right?

[jimene79]

And maybe just maybe Heather is thinking of, and treating Bethenny like the coworker she is. Maybe just maybe Heather knew of a park nearby where the kids could play. No matter how much Bethenny wants to pretend she's above all these other women, she's a desperate harpy trying to keep her 15 minute flame burning just like the rest of them. Despite their attempts to be welcoming and friendly to her, Bethenny has treated her coworkers horribly. And yet they stupidly keep trying to include her in things. What they should do now is give her the space she wants. Ignore her. Have fun without her. Follow Jill's advice and just film around her. Eventually hopefully she'll just fade away.

Noone saw the actual start of the "fix it" conversation so noone knows who started it (although didn't another HW say Bethenny was the one who brought it up that night). Since we have seen her bring it up randomly to her real estate broker (followed by yet another bullshit crying session), it's not much of a stretch to believe she brings it up often.

Didn't Carole say Bethenny talks about it all of the time to them?

[pbutler111]

Since we have seen her bring it up randomly to her real estate broker (followed by yet another bullshit crying session), it's not much of a stretch to believe she brings it up often.

 

 

Bethenny's real estate broker is a close, personal friend.  There's a world of difference between crying to your close friend about how difficult it is to not have a fixed home for your child (especially when the friend is in the business of helping you find a home) and confiding in Heather Thomson, who you can't stand and who is so pathetically desperate to be confided in.

[WireWrap]

 

I wasn't quoting Bethenny saying that Heather was trying to control her, I was expressing my opinion of what Heather has been doing.  And I don't recall Bethenny ever -- ever -- introducing the subject of her divorce or her custody situation with Heather.

Bethenny has talked about her custody problems/concerns on almost every episode in 1 form or another. Has she said, "let me tell you about my custody problem/reality", No. What she has done has said that she only has Bryn x number of days a month or for x number of hours or that she has to leave to get her because she only has her x number of days/hours, so Yes, Bethenny does bring up the topic. Bethenny is a veteran on these shows and knows if she talks about it, it then becomes a topic for the other women and they are often prodded into it by producers looking for fireworks to film. Notice that Bethenny has not mentioned that she was living with her then BF on the show and no one is calling her out on that or that she has a BF, at least so far, even though I am pretty sure they were well aware of that situation. All they know about her custody issue is what was reported in the press/tabloids and that was only that Bethenny/Jason have shared, 50/50 custody but not the details of who has Bryn when and for how long because that was never reported. And Bethenny has talked about Bryn/custody in front of Heather as she has all the other HWs.

[Celia Rubenstein]

And maybe just maybe Heather is thinking of, and treating Bethenny like the coworker she is. Maybe just maybe Heather knew of a park nearby where the kids could play. 

 

I don't know if co-workers expect their kids to have play dates.  That seems like more of a friend thing to me. Or maybe an "our kids go to school together" thing.  

 

Well, their kids don't go to school together.  They don't know each other at all.  And given that Bethenny doesn't seem interested in being Heather's friend at this point, I can see why she doesn't want to do anything to bring about more social contact between them than the show requires.  Especially if it is going to involve her child.  Really, Bryn should not be dragged into the situation.  The two women don't get along at all.  Why would either one of them want to foster a relationship between Bryn and Heather's kids?  So they can be exposed to the arguments and awkwardness? 

 

The whole play date thing felt like another attempt by Heather to back Bethenny into a corner and make her "bond" against her will.  I am glad Bethenny didn't let it happen.  

[pbutler111]

Bethenny has talked about her custody problems/concerns on almost every episode in 1 form or another. Has she said, "let me tell you about my custody problem/reality", No. What she has done has said that she only has Bryn x number of days a month or for x number of hours or that she has to leave to get her because she only has her x number of days/hours, so Yes, Bethenny does bring up the topic. Bethenny is a veteran on these shows and knows if she talks about it, it then becomes a topic for the other women and they are often prodded into it by producers looking for fireworks to film. Notice that Bethenny has not mentioned that she was living with her then BF on the show and no one is calling her out on that or that she has a BF, at least so far, even though I am pretty sure they were well aware of that situation. All they know about her custody issue is what was reported in the press/tabloids and that was only that Bethenny/Jason have shared, 50/50 custody but not the details of who has Bryn when and for how long because that was never reported. And Bethenny has talked about Bryn/custody in front of Heather as she has all the other HWs.

 

So what is she supposed to say when she's being asked about/bitched out about her absence from certain events?  Is she supposed to make something up so that people won't say she's talking about her personal life?  Or is she supposed to tell the truth, trusting that most mature, intelligent people (precluding many on this show) are going to understand her situation?

[DebbieM4]

Bethenny pushes her away because she does not want to be her friend. I really think it's as simple as that. For whatever her reason, Bethenny does not wish to connect with Heather and that is her right. Heather is old enough to accept what is being said to her and back off, but the more Bethenny pulls away, the more Heather latches on. It's really weird to watch.

 

I agree.  And I'm surprised that Heather is suddenly so awful at picking up on social cues.  It's clear that she's trying to be too close for Bethenny's comfort, so the thing to do is freakin' back off.  At least for a little while.  Maybe wait a bit, and then take baby steps.  Casually mention the weather or something else less personal.  But she's all up in Bethenny's business and shows no signs of backing down.  Bethenny didn't respond at all when Heather mentioned the possibility of their kids playing together.  Take a hint!  My personality is nothing like Bethenny's, but I would absolutely be pulling back too if I felt that someone was trying to get too close too fast and was continually crossing a line.  And if I felt I needed to be abrupt, I would do that also.  

 

Heather seems to be determined to "help" Bethenny and to be her friend, but she's getting in her own way, and doesn't seem to realize that when something is not working there's no point in continuing the same behaviors.  I think some of it could be chalked up to simple social blunders, but attempting to take Bethenny by the hand and remove her from the room put it all in a whole other category for me.  There was nothing to indicate that Bethenny would be open to that, it was completely inappropriate, and it was wrong of Heather to be so dramatic and cause a scene at what was supposed to be a nice dinner.  And calling people out for having a private conversation was out of line too.  No one named her classroom monitor!  A good guest sits at the table, talks to the people nearby, compliments the food, and contributes in a way that adds positively to the evening.  If a friendly overture is shut down, then let it go and don't be the cause of a disruption that impacts everyone else.  (As a host, I would be less than happy if one of my guests pulled another one away from the table under those circumstances.  It's ridiculous.  And rude.)

 

I loved Heather up until this season, but I think she's behaving childishly.  Her need for immediate gratification shouldn't trump everything and everyone else.  Her behavior more & more is starting to seem immature and self-centered.  If her ego isn't being fed the way she wants it to be, she can't handle it.  Bethenny is a mess in many ways, but it was Heather who escalated the whole situation, and I really thought she was much more together than that.

[WireWrap]

Bethenny's real estate broker is a close, personal friend.  There's a world of difference between crying to your close friend about how difficult it is to not have a fixed home for your child (especially when the friend is in the business of helping you find a home) and confiding in Heather Thomson, who you can't stand and who is so pathetically desperate to be confided in.

Her REA is another Reality persona for Bravo and didn't he say that he really didn't know her all that well and was surprised she shared all that with him? Bethenny tells everyone about her custody issue, it is a major storyline for her this season and, IMO, it what she wants as her main SL as she keeps repeating it and I believe she hopes that it garners her the single mom viewer support and the sympathy support for everyone else. This season is all about Bethenny getting back the large number of fans/supporters she lost during her own spin off, the talk show and the custody/divorce reports. Her "brand" took a huge hit and she needs to do everything she can to regain what she lost to get it back on tract.  JMO

[hottesthw]

Or she is just sick of someone she doesn't cotton to constantly trying to ingratiate herself, pry into her business, s/mother her, and correct her behavior.

Could be. And if so, then she should get herself off of my tv so then noone would care about her mother/father/custody issues. But as long as she keeps taking a paycheck and talking about them....

[ottergirl]

Ugh, Twitter is eviscerating Heather. She has said that she behaved horribly and owns it, but also said in response to one comment "thanks Mama I'm taking a beating with her editing stick."

To which Bethenny sub-tweeted her, saying all righteous, "@Bethenny: Hold up white girl. R we blaming editing at this point? In 9 seasons of reality tv i've done i've never done that. #itaintthehills"

So gross. And the comments beneath THAT are really foul.

Bethenny, you haven't had a bad edit because Andy has protected you - and for many of those seasons you were executive producer in control of the edit. You are way too smart to not get that "edit" is about "choosing the narrative" and yes, there are always winners and losers. The old "they only use what you give them" argument has been proven invalid again and again. Producers manipulate and create characters to suit their needs. There's a whole new TV show ("unReal") based on this completely known dynamic.

Look, Heather is a smart, adult woman who made an informed choice to do this show and to come back twice. All actions have consequences, all risks have possible fallout, and she's living through that right now. So she's not a victim. But she's going through the shit and I feel bad for her, angry with the editors (they really don't seem to get that these are real people), disgusted by some of the commenters (not here so much as on Twitter), and frankly, starting to feel a little disappointed in myself for being part of it.

[jimene79]

I have a hard time believing that Bethenny's divorce/custody situation or anything is off limits since she's actually discussing it with me (and all of you) every episode and we don't even know her personally.  This is a woman who goes to the bathroom in front of a tv audience- there are no boundaries and she shouldn't expect me to buy that others are being oh so inappropriate by not having boundaries either.

Edited June 4, 2015 by jimene79

[WireWrap]

So what is she supposed to say when she's being asked about/bitched out about her absence from certain events?  Is she supposed to make something up so that people won't say she's talking about her personal life?  Or is she supposed to tell the truth, trusting that most mature, intelligent people (precluding many on this show) are going to understand her situation?

She talked about the custody starting on episode 1, well before anyone else was talking about it, before it became an issue with/for the other HWs. If she doesn't want anyone else to discuss it, shut up about it already, better yet, she should have never mentioned it. If her custody arrangement is such a problem with her then she should not have come back to the show until things were worked out and Bryn was doing better. Bethenny used her custody as her storyline, not the other HWs. JMO

[hottesthw]

Bethenny's real estate broker is a close, personal friend. There's a world of difference between crying to your close friend about how difficult it is to not have a fixed home for your child (especially when the friend is in the business of helping you find a home) and confiding in Heather Thomson, who you can't stand and who is so pathetically desperate to be confided in.

Bethenny's real estate broker sat on WWHL and when asked denied being her friend or knowing her very well at all. Basically said he was uncomfortable when she started in but it's his job to be there for his clients.

[judylo]

I am now rewatching and I gotta say, I do see a resemblance between Peter and Chris Noth! BUT I hate Carole and her SATC references.

[missy jo]

Mwell345 You could almost draw a line between the two halves of this show.

 

 

I really liked the first part of this episode! I laughed at Ramona stealing Carole's name for the house, Sonja’s shambling entrance, Heather putting on her fur vest to join Ramona, Dorinda's story about her home's background, the shopping trip in town, raven versus vulture, and Lu's dinner costume. Then the B showed up to rain down misery upon everyone.

 

Lotus Flower I thought Heather was on to something when she surmised that everyone seems afraid of criticizing Bethenny. Shades of Lisa Rinna's: "Why is everyone afraid of Kim Richards?" It's almost like she's the super successful former Housewife asked to return, or the franchise savior, or Andy's favorite, so no one dares say anything critical.

 

 

It was nearly identical! Hopefully B gets arrested for kicking a cop after filming ends.

 

Lizzing Bethenny wears me out.  She mentions she can only eat shellfish, but then shoots down both Dorinda's and Heather's alternative food suggestions, saying she'll make do.  So why mention her food allergy at all if it ain't no big thing?

 

 

John and Dorinda both made suggestions, but Beth only bitched out Heather, per usual.

 

When Peter, Ramona, and Heather are talking about Peter's restaurant work, Bethenny is pulling faces and being a giggly 12 year old with Sonja. Granted, Peter's work history wasn't scintillating, but it was standard "get to know you" harmless dinner chit chat.

 

 

I watch with close-captioning on, and B was saying to Sonja (paraphrasing), "Should I stab myself with this butter knife or should I ..." giving me the impression that they were actually making fun of the conversation, and I got why Heather said something.

 

Sleek and Chic I'm sorry to say that B can't live happily without being on tv and in the spotlight. If her primary focus was truly spending every minute with Bryn on her custodial days, she would have never taken this job again. Plus, she originally pitched a Bethenny Starting Over show of her own.

 

 

According to B, she is going through the worst time of her entire life right now, but her first impulse is to pitch Andy a new reality show spin-off?! She can fuck right off with her pity party.

 

Wire Wrap and breezy424, I'm with y'all on PlayDateGate. It's a normal, sane gesture for Heather to suggest a playdate, which is why B looked at her like she just drowned a sack of kittens.

 

Ottergirl I think other posters were, like me, looking forward to seeing Carole's take on the situation ... we saw Heather complain to Carole about Bethenny ("she's being so mean!"), but Carole's response was completely edited out, leaving the impression that Carole just stonewalled Heather.  Which I don't believe at all. The ONE talking head Carole had was slightly pro-Heather, when she said Bethenny had two settings, tightly wound or crying.  Bethenny complained about even this mild Carole quote in her own blog this morning.  Do we think Andy has a literal muzzle on Carole right now, or is it just a contractual one?

 

 

I'm surprised that they even left in Carole's TH about Beth (which was 100% on point!); I think anything negative on Beth that doesn't come from Heather is being left on the cutting-room floor.

 

Pattycake2 It appeared to me that Heather, having been the recipient of Bethenny's overt rudeness in the previous weeks, had decided that she wasn't going to let it slide anymore.  So, Heather pushed and probed and gave tit for tat.  Until Bethenny cried.  When Bethenny cried, she won.

 

 

I won too! When Heather finally had it and said, "I can say whatever the fuck I want to you," I fist-pumped and shouted, "Yeah!"

 

Trooper York I think it is absolutely correct that Bethenny doesn't take well to mothering. So maybe Heather should try "Fathering." Or "Step Fathering." She should just hit her with a cellphone

 

 

You win the comments today.

 

ETA: ottergirl, that sucks about the Twitter thing. I need to start a personal Twitter so I can harass Andy and Beth.

Edited June 4, 2015 by missy jo

[hottesthw]

So what is she supposed to say when she's being asked about/bitched out about her absence from certain events? Is she supposed to make something up so that people won't say she's talking about her personal life? Or is she supposed to tell the truth, trusting that most mature, intelligent people (precluding many on this show) are going to understand her situation?

If she has a "situation" that can't be discussed on tv then maybe she should not have signed up for another season. No other HW gets to keep certain things about their lives private, so why does she expect it.

[SCS]

Ugh, Twitter is eviscerating Heather. She has said that she behaved horribly and owns it, but also said in response to one comment "thanks Mama I'm taking a beating with her editing stick."

To which Bethenny sub-tweeted her, saying all righteous, "@Bethenny: Hold up white girl. R we blaming editing at this point? In 9 seasons of reality tv i've done i've never done that. #itaintthehills"

So gross. And the comments beneath THAT are really foul.

Bethenny, you haven't had a bad edit because Andy has protected you - and for many of those seasons you were executive producer in control of the edit. You are way too smart to not get that "edit" is about "choosing the narrative" and yes, there are always winners and losers. The old "they only use what you give them" argument has been proven invalid again and again. Producers manipulate and create characters to suit their needs. There's a whole new TV show ("unReal") based on this completely known dynamic.

Look, Heather is a smart, adult woman who made an informed choice to do this show and to come back twice. All actions have consequences, all risks have possible fallout, and she's living through that right now. So she's not a victim. But she's going through the shit and I feel bad for her, angry with the editors (they really don't seem to get that these are real people), disgusted by some of the commenters (not here so much as on Twitter), and frankly, starting to feel a little disappointed in myself for being part of it.

Thank you. And, for what it's worth, I don't think Heather behaved horribly at all. Heather, if you're lurking, get on with your bad self and keep building your truly successful business. Beth, if you're lurking, go wee in a bucket.

[SFoster21]

I just don't see this awful Bethenny mistreating everyone. she's taking pix of LuAnn, giggling with Sonja and Ramona, speaking with Dorinda and John.

Heather tells her that she, B, and Sonja need to listen to everyone else and when B replies "we have a right to have a conversation," responds with "you need to lighten up." Seriously, fuck you, Heather. She had just been accused of grilling R's date, so she was out of line there as well.

She told Carole that she could "fix" Bethenny's food, but B didn't want her to as though not wanting Heather to fix things is some kind of crime. I would have been so pissed off by her that I would have been crying too. She was like some lumbering truck that kept coming. And, she had a nasty expression on her face the entire time.

I have read posts that said H had no THs during that exchange and that contention is inaccurate. She has several THs. Bethenny owes her no more than a nod and a smile. She got that; but she wants more, for whatever reason. I don't hold a brief for anyone and I can't pretend to have insight into their motivations, but Heather's actions were distressing to witness and not a good look for her.

[ScoobieDoobs]

Bethenny's real estate broker is a close, personal friend.

 

OK, and you know this -- um, how?  The same source who told you Carole has a billion bucks?  Fredrik is merely another Bravo reality show ho.  If there is any other connection, please show it -- and not from Radar, thanks.

 

Look, Bethenny's got a shtick & a script & she's sticking to it.  Maybe even she realized at this point in filming, the crying to anyone near her is getting tiresome & annoying.

 

So I mentioned in the thread for last ep I spotted Satan Andy wandering around Chelsea.  He said on WWHL he's off for a few weeks.  I'm wondering if he's not vacationing somewhere fancy-shmancy with Anderson Cooper or Kelly Ripa (or someone else he can brag about traveling with) cuz he's shitting bricks about this show.  I bet he's staying in town cuz he's  waiting anxiously to see if ratings are improving at all.  And I wouldn't be surprised if he's having Bethenny add in more TH's in future eps to make her at least a little more likeable, if that's at all possible.  I don't think it is.  The attempt to do that is futile.

Edited June 4, 2015 by ScoobieDoobs

[SFoster21]

FWIW, "ratings" don't register to me. These boards do and pages have multiplied exponentially this season. People are watching, people are involved.

And, despite B's so-called sympathetic "edit," there is plenty of downright hostility directed her way. If Heather is getting a bitch edit, maybe she should cease the bitchiness. She's displayed plenty.

Edited June 4, 2015 by SFoster21

[blueeyed]

Dorinda's eyes look dark hazel or brown on the show. In her TH's they're almost crystal blue.  I couldn't figure out why she looked so different in her THs and that's the reason. Maybe it's just different lighting or is she wearing colored contacts? 

 

I'm missing the food porn.  Did anyone notice that one of the vegetable/salad courses was served under individual ice igloos.  And I'm sure the sushi, which can be an art form, was beautiful.  Yet not a glimpse. Phooey.

I noticed that glimpse too. I wanted more. It looked beautiful.

Edited June 4, 2015 by blueeyed

[ScoobieDoobs]

Then the B showed up to rain down misery upon everyone.

 

That shit about wanting to leave a wall up is serious crazy talk. Made me uncomfortable as hell.  Sorry, but if I actually heard someone in real life say something like that I'd think they were in urgent need of psychiatric help.  I just didn't get the connection of Bethenny then saying she could be a crying heap or mess on the floor.  If this description of herself is accurate, she should be checked into a mental health facility & should in no way be responsible for caring for a child.  

 

But we know this is not an accurate description.  It's just more idiotic bullshit being thrown at us by Bethenny.  And it's also her overly dramatic way of telling Heather to get the fuck away from her & to leave her alone.

 

Hey, I don't blame Bethenny for wanting Heather to get off her case.  But shit, she coulda been a teeny bit nicer about it.  Ya think?

Edited June 4, 2015 by ScoobieDoobs

[DebbieM4]

Why?  I don't think Heather knew when Beth got up there and what's wrong with their kids playing together?  And I doubt Heather's kids were at the hotel.  They probably were staying at their house up there.

 

There would be nothing wrong with their kids playing together if Heather & Bethenny were friends.  Or if they were in the process of getting to know each other.  But Bethenny does not want a relationship with Heather, and she's made that clear.  Suggesting that their children could have played together came across as just another way for Heather to push herself into Bethenny's life.  They're not friends and their children don't know each other.   And Bethenny is not interested, no matter how many different ways Heather tries.  Why would she encourage Heather by having their children play together?  She's trying to keep Heather at arm's length, and is having enough trouble with that as it is.

 

I honestly can't understand why this is such a huge issue for Heather.  There are lots of other other women.  Talk to them, be friendly with them, concentrate on them, think about them.  But she really needs to back off and let this obsessive need to be Bethenny's friend go.  The more she pushes, the more idiotic she looks.