Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"

[Quof]

I once went into a Lululemon (before I learned of their generally hateful attitude toward women who are not skeletons, now I won't give them a penny. http://bust.com/general/10300-fat-shaming-or-smart-marketing-why-lululemon-and-others-dont-sell-plus-sizes.html).

I looked over the entire store before a young, bubbly blonde asked "Can I help you?"  I replied "I guess you can't.  I don't see anything in this store bigger than a size 10."  "Oh," she said in a breathy, baby voice.  "You don't look that big."  I responded "I'm not 'that big'.  I'm a healthy, normal sized adult female.  And girls like you pay for boobs like these." And I left. 

[TattleTeeny]

What I hate is the difference in men's and women's T-shirts--like graphic or band ones! Just because I am small doesn't mean I want the shirt to have a deeper neckline or a curvier shape (though I do like a slim-fit) or, ugh, those fucking teeny cap sleeves! If the men's small (because there are rarely men's XS) is made of the lighter and softer (and generally more desirable) fabric, it's still too big and floppy. If the men's small happens to be a just-OK fit, it's always made of that heavier T-shirt fabric...which is boxy, stiff, scratchy, and uncomfortable. Bah!

Edited October 21, 2017 by TattleTeeny

[bilgistic]

17 minutes ago, Quof said:

And girls like you pay for boobs like these." And I left. 

BOOM!

3 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

What I hate is the difference in men's and women's T-shirts--like graphic or band ones! Just because I am small doesn't mean I want the shirt to have a deeper neckline or a curvier shape (though I do like a slim-fit) or, ugh, those fucking teeny cap sleeves! If the men's small (because there are rarely men's XS) is made of the light (more desirable) fabric, it's still too big and floppy. If the men's small happens to be a just-OK fit, it's always made of that heavier T-shirt fabric...which is boxy, stiff, scratchy, and uncomfortable. Bah!

I fucking HATE cap sleeves. H A T E.

I almost always wear v-necks because I feel like I'm being strangled otherwise. I wear big t-shirts to sleep in, and will cut a slit down the center of the neck hole. I'm a "hot sleeper", so that heavy fabric is death. I will wake up in the middle of the night with my face, neck and bosom (ha!) drenched.

[TattleTeeny]

While I do have days when I like a roomy T-shirt with leggings (sorry! I know leggings-as-pants peeves some people!) or whatever, I can't sleep in them because they have too much room to get all twisty! I tend toward those cheapo spaghetti-strap tanks with a built-in shelf bra (though if you have any kind of bosom (haHA!) to speak of, those shirts are probably a nightmare.

[Bastet]

I hate when a message, alma mater logo, etc. t-shirt I want isn't available as a tank top -- the regular t-shirts are too thick and boxy (and are often crew neck instead of v-neck, which I cannot stand), the "women's cut" tees have those goddamned cap sleeves (and are too much of a slim fit), so the tank top is my only option.

Edited October 21, 2017 by Bastet

[Quof]

I was travelling this week, and realized I had packed 2 pyjama tops and no bottoms.  In order to avoid Porky Pigging it, I made an emergency stop at a small town Walmart.  I'm living the dream.

Between vacation and work, I have spent 4 of the last 8 weeks travelling.   My hotel Pet Peeves could fill this entire page.  I was happy to get home and eat homemade food, so I spent a long time at three different markets today, buying all kinds of yummy ingredients.

Then I remembered I'm having oral surgery Monday.  So I guess I'll turn those ingredients into soup. 

[TattleTeeny]

Noooooooooooooo, Quof! That is terrible!

[Quof]

Which - the Walmart, or the surgery?

[bilgistic]

2 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

While I do have days when I like a roomy T-shirt with leggings (sorry! I know leggings-as-pants peeves some people!) or whatever, I can't sleep in them because they have too much room to get all twisty! I tend toward those cheapo spaghetti-strap tanks with a built-in shelf bra (though if you have any kind of bosom (haHA!) to speak of, those shirts are probably a nightmare.

Tank tops are usually fitted on me and are indeed a nightmare to sleep in. I'm of ample bosom and having fabric stuck to me at night is worse than it choking me. Also, shelf "bras" are a cruel joke on me.

I guess I "Porky Pig" it (ha!) because unless it's in the 50s or lower outside and therefore 60s inside, I don't wear pajama pants. I just wear my underwear under my big t-shirt.

How are the men that follow this thread enjoying this discussion?

[StatisticalOutlier]

5 minutes ago, bilgistic said:

How are the men that follow this thread enjoying this discussion?

And will that change if I divulge that I sleep naked?

[Quof]

I had a colleague who slept naked (don't know why she ever needed to tell me this).   This included in hotels, where she once thought she was going to the bathroom, but had actually opened the door to the hall.   You can guess what happened next....

[ratgirlagogo]

4 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I was never small.

 

4 hours ago, bilgistic said:

. I was still a solid size six.

SIZE SIX???!!!   how is that not a small size!!???

[bilgistic]

2 minutes ago, ratgirlagogo said:

 

SIZE SIX???!!!   how is that not a small size!!???

I was always thick, never reedy. Always had boobs and thighs. My sisters are taller and were thinner. I'm short-ish (5'3"), so size two to maybe eight is what I "should" be. Working out doesn't make me smaller; it bulks me up.

I don't know; I have hangups.

[TattleTeeny]

1 hour ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

And will that change if I divulge that I sleep naked?

I usually do too, actually. But not in a hotel because I am riddled with issues!

Edited October 22, 2017 by TattleTeeny

[bilgistic]

If I could sufficiently get clean in the shower while wearing clothes, I would.

My body issues have always been bad, regardless of my size. I hate to blame my mother for it, but there is a correlation between daughters having a mother who diets and daughters having body issues. Clearly, that's not all of it.

I feel a little better about myself if I have a partner who appreciates my figure, no matter its state, but then I realize that I shouldn't look for gratification in others.

Land mines everywhere!

[AgentRXS]

3 minutes ago, bilgistic said:

My body issues have always been bad, regardless of my size. I hate to blame my mother for it, but there is a correlation between daughters having a mother who diets and daughters having body issues. Clearly, that's not all of it.

I feel a little better about myself if I have a partner who appreciates my figure, no matter its state, but then I realize that I shouldn't look for gratification in others.

I hear you. I'm 5'6 and I was never larger than a 4 until I hit 26. Even then, I carried all the weight in my breasts, belly and thighs. When I weighed 100lbs, I was skeleton with a size B chest,  stomach pouch and bird legs.  My grandmother (my primary caretaker) raised me to believe that fat is disgusting. She never  criticized me, but she would always see heavier people and say "Look at the gut on them. What a pig". When I hit 26, within a few weeks I went from 130 to 150 without a change in diet at all. All 20lbs sat in my stomach. When she came to visit that year, she was like "You really packed on the pounds. Maybe you should join a gym". So I did. All that happened was that the muscles in my arms and legs hardened, but that damn belly was still there. No matter my diet or how much cardio I did, I could never lose the fat around my stomach area.

After getting my current job, I stopped working out since I work nights and don't have the energy to wake up early to go to the gym. My weight has climbed to190 lb now. My thighs rub when I walk and have created holes in my work pants. I can't stand to see my stomach at all and wear baggy shirts. My grandmother said nothing during her last visit, but when I brought it up, she said "Your over 30 now. It is what is...you won't be able to lose it. Hopefully you'll find a guy that likes you at your size".

My last boyfriend claimed to not care about my figure, but I didn't really believe him. When we were intimate, I would put a blanket over my stomach area so he wouldn't have to see it. When he tried to remove it, I would put it back over it. So having a partner that is content with your body will mean nothing until you are content with it yourself.  I try every day to work on my self-acceptance but every day I fall short.

Being a woman really sucks sometimes.

[Bastet]

3 minutes ago, AgentRXS said:

Being a woman really sucks sometimes.

It's horrible what we're conditioned to think of/do to ourselves.  Similar to your example, I have a friend who's told me she won't take her shirt off during sex because she's embarrassed of her small breasts.  I told her big ones slide halfway down into your armpits when you lie on your back and bounce all over the place during sex.  It is what it is.  But it can be very hard to accept that when bombarded with messages about how awful and shameful it is if our bodies don't meet some narrow standard that's pervasive in media but uncommon in "real" life. 

[Quof]

Every woman thinks when a man sees her naked, he's looking at her saggy, baggy, wrinkly body and thinking "yuck." He's really thinking "woo hoo, she's naked." 

[Mindthinkr]

@Quof  You have my best wishes and deepest sympathy. Oral surgery is the pits. 

[Bastet]

11 minutes ago, Quof said:

Every woman thinks when a man sees her naked, he's looking at her saggy, baggy, wrinkly body and thinking "yuck." He's really thinking "woo hoo, she's naked." 

Ha!  Usually quite true; in the most general terms, you tend to hear comments criticizing women they don't know and have no chance of ever sleeping with, but when it comes time to actually have sex with a woman, they're pretty happy one has gotten naked with them.

The worst example of one-on-one assholery about a woman's "imperfect" body I ever heard was a co-worker whose husband (who, thankfully, became her ex-husband) made comments about how "ugly" and "distracting" her c-section scar was.  Seriously?!  Those scars are small, and pretty much obscured by hair (on those who keep their pubic hair, anyway).  But even if it was up high, big, and otherwise noticeable -- she got that giving birth to their child!

[bilgistic]

@AgentRXS, I HATE my stomach. No one but cats are allowed to touch it. It's good for "making biscuits".

[TattleTeeny]

Quote

she got that giving birth to their child!

Right?! And she goes home with a healing wound, aches, pains, and a newborn to care for (and maybe even feed from that same achy body), while men who get, say, a hernia operation get sent home with a healing wound, aches, pains, and instructions to rest and be waited on...and sans helpless infant! 

Edited October 22, 2017 by TattleTeeny

[AgentRXS]

2 hours ago, bilgistic said:

@AgentRXS, I HATE my stomach. No one but cats are allowed to touch it. It's good for "making biscuits".

The only thing worse than my stomach to me is my face. I had Bell's Palsy (sudden paralysis on the side of your face) at both ages 9 and 16. I've mostly recovered except my lips droop a tiny bit to one side. And one eye appears bigger than the other. Its not noticeable until I take a photo of myself. It also makes my smile look at bit crooked. I tend to avoid taking photos at all costs.

Before I could even begin to accept my weight gain, I have to learn how to accept my facial features...its a real battle, let me tell you.

Edited October 22, 2017 by AgentRXS

[riley702]

Hugs, AgentRXS. I've always thought I was ugly, even though I don't care what anyone else looks like. I just know I don't measure up. I've been in double digit clothes sizes since my age was in double digits. It just is what it is now.

[Bastet]

26 minutes ago, riley702 said:

Hugs, AgentRXS. I've always thought I was ugly, even though I don't care what anyone else looks like.

@riley702, thanks to Chit Chat, I saw a picture of you in the midst of cancer treatment.  You did not look ugly then.  And if you don't look ugly when your body is under that kind of stress, you're not ugly looking - by whatever parameters one is using to define that - under normal circumstances.  In fact, you looked radiant; that picture has stuck with me.  Look, yes - beauty is subjective, but there are some features on which a majority of people agree as attractive versus not.  By those standards, not everyone is attractive.  But "ugly" is something that seeps out from the inside.  Even setting that aside, and just going by "attractive" versus "unfortunate, given society's standard" you do not fit into the latter!

[AgentRXS]

3 minutes ago, Bastet said:

@riley702, thanks to Chit Chat, I saw a picture of you in the midst of cancer treatment.  You did not look ugly then.  And if you don't look ugly when your body is under that kind of stress, you're not ugly looking - by whatever parameters one is using to define that - under normal circumstances.  In fact, you looked radiant; that picture has stuck with me.  Look, yes - beauty is subjective, but there are some features on which a majority of people agree as attractive versus not.  By those standards, not everyone is attractive.  But "ugly" is something that seeps out from the inside.  Even setting that aside, and just going by "attractive" versus "unfortunate, given society's standard" you do not fit into the latter!

Agreed!

[riley702]

Aww, guys! Now I'm teary. But feeling better. Thanks.

[StatisticalOutlier]

6 hours ago, Quof said:

I had a colleague who slept naked (don't know why she ever needed to tell me this).   This included in hotels, where she once thought she was going to the bathroom, but had actually opened the door to the hall.   You can guess what happened next....

That reminds me of something I was thinking about the other day.  Many years ago I was staying in a motel, like a two- or three-storey place, with interior halls.  The fire alarm went off in the middle of the night.  Since I was naked, I quickly got dressed in the clothes I'd been wearing that day.  I figured it was a false alarm, and felt the door and it wasn't hot, and looked down the hall and there wasn't any smoke, so I took a few seconds to throw all my stuff into my bag, and went out into the parking lot. 

There were all these people out there standing around in their pajamas, who hadn't brought anything with them.  I went and sat in my car while everything got sorted out, and was prepared to go somewhere else if the place really did burn down.

But it made me think about the people who just jumped out of bed and ran out the door in an unfamiliar city when they heard the alarm.  I guess they just react, without thinking?  Because if there aren't flames licking at your heels, it takes only a few of seconds to throw on some clothes, and at least then you're not stuck outside in your nightgown if it takes hours to be admitted back into your room. 

I'm (as usual) an outlier on this, but it seems really sensible to me.

[DeLurker]

17 hours ago, Mindthinkr said:

I I asked the friendly salesperson where the large sizes were or what fashions they had them in. She replied "Oh no, the people who shop here are your size and we don't order more than one large in anything".

In the older days when haunting the mall was living the teenage dream, there was a store called 5-7-9 which were the sizes they sold.  At the time, I was a walking twig so even those clothes were too big for me. 

 

17 hours ago, PRgal said:

OMG! I never see XS ANYWHERE!  XS is the FIRST to go where I live - even though there is a HUGE Asian clientele.  Either these women buy everything as soon as it hits the racks or they just don't care that there is a larger proportion of people in the 0-4 range.  

Given the discussion I was trying to decide if HUGE meant quantity or girth :<)

I've always been a big fan of oversized clothes, so always had a skewed image of what my actual size was (and of course, it varies by brand).  Most clothes that fit technically always felt so constraining because my comfort level is set for roomy.

[PRgal]

13 hours ago, ratgirlagogo said:

 

SIZE SIX???!!!   how is that not a small size!!???

In many parts of Asia, that's pretty much a medium.  My husband is a large man (in girth, not height - at 5'10" and a bit, he's pretty average in that department) and while I was able to find A LOT of clothing in my size when we were in Hong Kong last time, he found very little.  

NOTE:  We're talking about an American size 6, not British. 

Edited October 22, 2017 by PRgal

[NutMeg]

Regarding sizes, it always amazes me when people are stuck on a specific number. So often a bigger size would look more flattering and, yes, make you look slimmer, than the one you squeeze yourself into just so you can say you're size so or so. But that's another story - when I can see flesh squeezed out of bras because the shirt is that tight, it screams person not knowing the most flattering size of cut for their body.

I am the most "normal" size (which sucks, because it means I have a hard time finding nice things left if I wait too long to go look out sales). This preamble to explain what follows:

I once got into a Marina Rinaldi shop. I really liked what they had in their window and wanted to try some of their clothes. The second I got in, a snotty (as I saw it) saleswoman asked me what size I was. I was taken aback, but answered that I was this normally, but I could be a size up or down depending on the cut and brand, and she kind of kicked me out the store by telling me that they only had sizes yyy and up. So yeah, that happens too :) It's too bad, because I like oversized sweaters and stuff, but it turned out well, because I told my mum, who's on the big side, to look up that brand, and she's loved the clothes she's bought there ever since. 

12 hours ago, AgentRXS said:

The only thing worse than my stomach to me is my face. I had Bell's Palsy (sudden paralysis on the side of your face) at both ages 9 and 16. I've mostly recovered except my lips droop a tiny bit to one side. And one eye appears bigger than the other. Its not noticeable until I take a photo of myself. It also makes my smile look at bit crooked. I tend to avoid taking photos at all costs.

Before I could even begin to accept my weight gain, I have to learn how to accept my facial features...its a real battle, let me tell you.

Doesn't everyone have one eye bigger than the other? It's not noticeable until you pay attention, but it's true for all, so don't fret bout it :) I think there isn't any perfectly symmetrical face.

[TattleTeeny]

Don't say that! No one is UGLY, you guys! Or at least not to EVERYONE! I always have to tell my sister this--she's a larger size and taller than I am and gets into funks about it, and thinks that I cannot possibly dislike parts of my appearance (like everyone else on earth, I do). But what she doesn't get is that the guys (and I only use the whole "validation from a man" thing as an example because that's her issue with this shit) who prefer a taller chick--with more of an actual shape, haha!--would definitely prefer her to me, just as guys who like a more gregarious girl also would...or a tattoo-free girl...or whatever other arbitrary thing initially catches someone's eye (and god damn it, I would love to have some of her height! Come on--she bypassed me in that regard when she was 12 and I was 16!). I look at my BF and see the cutest thing ever but if I try hard, I can understand that some people would disagree for any number of reasons. Personally, I cannot see the attractiveness of Ryan Gosling. But I would lay a big fat smooch on Louis CK, haha! 

Yes, I know I am over simplifying (and I also get that most people would prefer to look like RG than LCK). I don't know what I am saying*...maybe that no one is everyone's perfect cup of tea!

* Because I just got back from my first workout at the gym I found. Oh my effin' god, I must be more out of shape than I thought, haha! The jury is out as to whether I like this at all!

 

Quote

In many parts of Asia, that's pretty much a medium. 

If I buy clothes via Ebay from Asia, I have to go for L or XL; I am 5'4" and hover around 118, give or take. 

Edited October 22, 2017 by TattleTeeny

[Maizie131]

Can I please bitch about Christmas movies on both Hallmark channels starting 24/7 this coming Friday and lasting until December 31st?!?!?  I thoroughly enjoy watching Hallmark Movies & Mysteries because I love Columbo, Matlock, Diagnosis Murder & Monk.  They're apparently all gone for the next 2 fricking months!!  Just today I ordered the "complete" Columbo series ($64 on Amazon), I've already got complete Monk.  Is it just me or does anyone else agree this is absolutely ridiculous?  Can't it wait until Thanksgiving Day to start?!? 

ETA:  I'm sorry for disrupting your conversation about weight/clothes.  I must say I'm disturbed that my 11 y.o. absolutely gorgeous Granddaughter is 4'10" and now weighs 110 lbs.  I am NOT happy, but would never EVER say anything to her.  Apparently this is against Grandmother Rules.  I just make damn sure whenever she comes over that I have NO junk in my house. 

Edited October 22, 2017 by Maizie131

[Sun-Bun]

3 hours ago, PRgal said:

In many parts of Asia, that's pretty much a medium.  My husband is a large man (in girth, not height - at 5'10" and a bit, he's pretty average in that department) and while I was able to find A LOT of clothing in my size when we were in Hong Kong last time, he found very little.  

NOTE:  We're talking about an American size 6, not British. 

I'll never forget the scene from RH of Beverly Hills, when Erika Jane was looking for clothes in an Asian market and she found her size only to exclaim "EXTRA LARGE??!! Well that took the wind right out of my sails..."

I had to chuckle as she glibly said that she's a size 6 in America((which I am as well)) but in Asia she's a big fat XL.

I totally feel her pain---just last month I excitedly ordered a bunch of clothes from an online Asian retailer, thinking I was getting a great deal. I ordered in my size and measurements too. I finally got the clothes, tried them all on and nearly wept in horror---it was all Asian hipster-sized and I looked like a damned stuffed sausage in everything. Apparently in Japan boobs and hips don't happen.

[NutMeg]

1 hour ago, TattleTeeny said:

If I buy clothes via Ebay from Asia, I have to go for L or XL; I am 5'4" and hover around 118, give or take. 

I know! I'm about the same, roughly, like one inch taller and two pounds heavier, but after living in Asia for years (and before that traveling there often for business), I'm used to being XL or even XXL and it doesn't faze me. Which may explain why I don't even pay attention to the dress sizes on the labels of my clothes :)

Quote

Can I please bitch about Christmas movies on both Hallmark channels starting 24/7 this coming Friday and lasting until December 31st?!?!? 

@Maizie131, I'm shocked that they are skipping Halloween and Thanksgiving themes altogether. 

[TattleTeeny]

I hate, hate, HATE when Hallmark does this. Eventually it becomes 24/7 temporarily! Then I can't fall asleep to Frasier! Also, shut up, Hallmark--Halloween is the best holiday ever!

Edited October 22, 2017 by TattleTeeny

[Mindthinkr]

32 minutes ago, Maizie131 said:

 

ETA:  I'm sorry for disrupting your conversation about weight/clothes.  I must say I'm disturbed that my 11 y.o. absolutely gorgeous Granddaughter is 4'10" and now weighs 110 lbs.  I am NOT happy, but would never EVER say anything to her.  Apparently this is against Grandmother Rules.  I just make damn sure whenever she comes over that I have NO junk in my house. 

Edited 27 minutes ago by Maizie131.

Although I understand your concern it may just be that weight will dissolve when she hits puberty. My grandson (IMO) had a few extra pounds on until he hit a growth spurt and puberty. Agree however that having healthy choices to eat is a good thing to do. 

I'm also disliking that too much tv is all about the holidays well before Halloween.  Then there are those endless repeats. 

23 minutes ago, Sun-Bun said:

-it was all Asian hipster-sized and I looked like a damned stuffed sausage in everything. Apparently in Japan boobs and hips don't happen.

That could be what's wrong with Vicki from RHOC's clothes because she looks like a stuffed sausage in most of them. 

[AgentRXS]

50 minutes ago, Maizie131 said:

Can I please bitch about Christmas movies on both Hallmark channels starting 24/7 this coming Friday and lasting until December 31st?!?!?  I thoroughly enjoy watching Hallmark Movies & Mysteries because I love Columbo, Matlock, Diagnosis Murder & Monk.  They're apparently all gone for the next 2 fricking months!!  Just today I ordered the "complete" Columbo series ($64 on Amazon), I've already got complete Monk.  Is it just me or does anyone else agree this is absolutely ridiculous?  Can't it wait until Thanksgiving Day to start?!? 

Believe me, its not just TV that seems to forget about Thanksgiving/Christmas. I went to Cracker Barrel last week and all I saw was Christmas merchandise. The small amount of Halloween/Thanksgiving displays were stuffed in a small corner somewhere. When I went there in August, that is when they had their Thanksgiving items on full display.  Halloween was almost completely overlooked.

Between this and seeing some FB friends posting "Its only X amount of weeks before Christmas!" I've kind of had enough. Christmas has always been my least favorite holiday, and seeing Christmas crap IRL and on TV already is just too much.

Last year, I went to Walgreens on Dec. 26th and they were putting up Valentine's Day displays. Nothing says I love you like 2-month old stale candy and cheap stuffed animals.

[PRgal]

44 minutes ago, NutMeg said:

I know! I'm about the same, roughly, like one inch taller and two pounds heavier, but after living in Asia for years (and before that traveling there often for business), I'm used to being XL or even XXL and it doesn't faze me. Which may explain why I don't even pay attention to the dress sizes on the labels of my clothes :)

@Maizie131, I'm shocked that they are skipping Halloween and Thanksgiving themes altogether. 

My mother was once told by a sales associate in HK to check out the plus section.  Mom is 5'5" and most definitely under a size 14 (I'd put her at an 8 or so - at least at that time, back in the 90s). 

[bilgistic]

2 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

Don't say that! No one is UGLY, you guys! Or at least not to EVERYONE! I always have to tell my sister this--she's a larger size and taller than I am and gets into funks about it, and thinks that I cannot possibly dislike parts of my appearance (like everyone else on earth, I do). But what she doesn't get is that the guys (and I only use the whole "validation from a man" thing as an example because that's her issue with this shit) who prefer a taller chick--with more of an actual shape, haha!--would definitely prefer her to me, just as guys who like a more gregarious girl also would...or a tattoo-free girl...or whatever other arbitrary thing initially catches someone's eye (and god damn it, I would love to have some of her height! Come on--she bypassed me in that regard when she was 12 and I was 16!). I look at my BF and see the cutest thing ever but if I try hard, I can understand that some people would disagree for any number of reasons. Personally, I cannot see the attractiveness of Ryan Gosling. But I would lay a big fat smooch on Louis CK, haha!

I have NEVER been attracted to the "conventionally handsome/hot" guys/men. Brad Pitt, Ryan Gosling, Chris Pine, etc. leave me cold. Now, Kevin James, especially in a beard--YUMMY! Give me a big guy with extra padding any day. And yes, yes, yes to facial hair.

I have found in my personal experience that guys who are into the gym tend to be way too much into themselves.

Over 15 years ago, I dated a guy (who was probably cheating on me, but was definitely lying to me about what he was doing at night) who hated my tattoos. Back then I had far fewer than now. He asked me, "How much would it cost to have that [points at tattoo] removed?" I replied, "Nothing, because I'm not getting it removed." Ass.

[backformore]

21 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

While I do have days when I like a roomy T-shirt with leggings (sorry! I know leggings-as-pants peeves some people!) or whatever, I can't sleep in them because they have too much room to get all twisty! I tend toward those cheapo spaghetti-strap tanks with a built-in shelf bra (though if you have any kind of bosom (haHA!) to speak of, those shirts are probably a nightmare.

Leggings are perfectly acceptable , in my opinion, when worn with a long t-shirt or sweater.   Leggings are also a way to make some of those too-short dresses look cute as hell.  

Leggings as pants - SOME leggings, on SOME people, look very weird/inappropriate when worn with short tops.  Again, my opinion.  

At Target, the uniform is red polo shirt and tan pants.   I once did a double-take when a Target employee was wearing tan LEGGINGS with her polo shirt, because at first glance she looked naked from the waist down. 

[PRgal]

Speaking of looks, guys rarely spoke to me in a "maybe this could eventually lead to a relationship" sort of way until I was in my mid-ish 20s (say, 23-24).  I have no clue why.  I had that really weird "awkward" kiss from a random guy in my last year of high school (and it wasn't even a REAL kiss - we're talking about a peck on the cheek sort of thing) and l didn't have my REAL kiss for another four years (again, fairly random, at a university semi-formal.  Don't really remember his name.  I didn't even know if he wanted a relationship (didn't give me a phone number) and I didn't want one at all at the time - at least not with someone a year below me as it happened just three months shy of my graduation).  Years later, I wonder if I was being an a-hole for not following up...but at least I fulfilled a bucket list item...I know I'm not ugly and wasn't at the time either (okay, maybe my acne scared some people, but that was high school).  

To keep this a legit pet peeve:  Yes, for the longest time, not getting guys to like me/being completely ignored by men was a pet peeve of mine.  As in they didn't even bother to look (okay, I was in drama, so many of the (few) guys there weren't into girls, but I was also a history major) at me (other than at clubs.  And I didn't club much).  I didn't have a lot of girl friends, so there wasn't much of a chance to be set up.  

[backformore]

5 hours ago, DeLurker said:

I've always been a big fan of oversized clothes, so always had a skewed image of what my actual size was (and of course, it varies by brand).  Most clothes that fit technically always felt so constraining because my comfort level is set for roomy.

Fashion has changed a lot, women now wear dresses that would have been considered much too tight when I was younger.   Look at maternity fashions.  When I was pregnant 30 years ago, you were supposed to wear loose flowy dresses.  Now, I see pregnant women wearing skin-tight dresses that emphasize their "bump." I get the body acceptance, and not hiding what we're "supposed"  to look like.   But really, the practical me just thinks "you're going to get even bigger, why buy a dress that won't fit when you're 9 months along?" 

[backformore]

1 hour ago, Maizie131 said:

.  I must say I'm disturbed that my 11 y.o. absolutely gorgeous Granddaughter is 4'10" and now weighs 110 lbs.  I am NOT happy, but would never EVER say anything to her.  Apparently this is against Grandmother Rules.  I just make damn sure whenever she comes over that I have NO junk in my house. 

PLEASE - keep in mind that this is a normal kind of pre-puberty thing a lot of girls go through.  They store fat and start to look "chunky" just before their last big growth spurt and the start of hormone changes, menstruation and breast development.   Her estrogen levels could be making her store fat differently right now.  

[peacheslatour]

17 minutes ago, backformore said:

Fashion has changed a lot, women now wear dresses that would have been considered much too tight when I was younger.   Look at maternity fashions.  When I was pregnant 30 years ago, you were supposed to wear loose flowy dresses.  Now, I see pregnant women wearing skin-tight dresses that emphasize their "bump." I get the body acceptance, and not hiding what we're "supposed"  to look like.   But really, the practical me just thinks "you're going to get even bigger, why buy a dress that won't fit when you're 9 months along?" 

I got really lucky. When I was pregnant with my son in 1986 the style was stretchy stirrup pants and over sized tops (and horrible, horrible shoulder pads) I never bought any maternity clothes.

[ari333]

I got chunky before my first period. I was told I was fat and put on a diet that I cheated on and made to hate my body. Then the period came and everything leaned out.  Anyway, it scarred me. So I was all stomach; then I was an hourglass with hips and breasts and flat stomach. I was made to feel bad about that too bc "boys are looking too much." So either way, my fault, I"m old now, but still remember.

PEEVE, "Do you really need that salad dressing?"

Edited October 22, 2017 by ari333

[bilgistic]

I got a TV riser for my TV, so I spent 45 minutes today unplugging everything and conquering the cord spaghetti behind the TV and components. I untangled and wrapped the excess cordage with Velcro straps before reconnecting everything. I want it etched on my cremains urn that I accomplished that. It's been my proudest achievement.

[janestclair]

Nice work @bilgistic.  I so need to do that with my computer cables.  But I'm sure it's dust bunny hell back there and that puts me off it.  

2 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I have NEVER been attracted to the "conventionally handsome/hot" guys/men. Brad Pitt, Ryan Gosling, Chris Pine, etc. leave me cold. 

I concur.  I think we are an anomaly.  

I wear a size XS and a 0, and it's only because I'm very petite.  As in, so petite that petite pants still need to be shortened.  For the longest time I was wearing clothes that were actually too big, and once I figured that out and started wearing the right size it looked like I'd dropped 25 pounds instead of the 10 that I really lost post college.   Most of that was from my chest, because of course it was. 

2 hours ago, backformore said:

At Target, the uniform is red polo shirt and tan pants.   I once did a double-take when a Target employee was wearing tan LEGGINGS with her polo shirt, because at first glance she looked naked from the waist down. 

I've definitely done that too.  Nude colored leggings should not be a thing.  

[Maizie131]

Quote

 

Mindthinkr & Backformore - Thanks so much for your responses re: my pudgy Granddaughter.  I sure hope you're both right that it may very well be a pre-puberty thing, and a growth spurt to come.  That would be fantastic.  She's just so damn beautiful (& I'm not just saying that) -- she has olive skin (Italian), great hair and HAD a darling little body until 2 years ago when she started gaining too much weight in a year's time, and not enough height to go with it.  Thanks, again, for your responses.

PS - pay no attention to that quote box - my mistake.

[TattleTeeny]

2 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I got a TV riser for my TV, so I spent 45 minutes today unplugging everything and conquering the cord spaghetti behind the TV and components. I untangled and wrapped the excess cordage with Velcro straps before reconnecting everything. I want it etched on my cremains urn that I accomplished that. It's been my proudest achievement.

Holy shit, our brains work in a similar way, man. I lost half a day of actual work once in my office after IT gave me a new Mac and just sort of slapped everything wherever and even ignored the holes that are IN THE DESK for cords! Savages.

Quote

I have NEVER been attracted to the "conventionally handsome/hot" guys/men. Brad Pitt, Ryan Gosling, Chris Pine, etc. leave me cold. Now, Kevin James, especially in a beard--YUMMY! Give me a big guy with extra padding any day. And yes, yes, yes to facial hair.

Two words: ROB ZOMBIE! That man is a devilish damn dreamboat! Oh, I swoon. What's funny is I also think ol' regular guy Christopher Meloni is the bee's knees too. Swoons for him also!

I do love a "too short" dress (when I am not wearing one that practically drags on the floor; I am a woman of extremes!)--and despite being only 5'4", I have legs are just about the same length as those of my 5'9" sister, so dresses look kind of shorter on me anyway--and have worn leggings with them. I hide them in boots though so some people probably still think I am being a little tarty, haha! While the tall leg is not a bad "problem" to have, I admit, it makes pants a pain in my ass (not literally), as my size seems to make manufacturers assume my legs are short. I often do the above-the-ankle jeans cuff for that reason--may as well make it look like I wanted short pants, damn it! I do love leggings with longer tops though--easy, comfortable, and works all year depending on the shoes! And depending what I'm doing (and how opaque the leggings!), I've been know to wear them with a non-oversized T as well.
 

Edited October 22, 2017 by TattleTeeny